Archived threads in /adv/ - Advice - 6674. page

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Is anyone here particularly familiar with like
the definition of conditional love
in the context of like someone who's really emotionally abusive and justifies it by saying they love you unconditionally but actually it's very much conditional?

I'm trying to get this person to understand what they're doing but they're in an extreme state of denial and I don't know what to do.
They're not listening to me at all so I'm resorting to try finding stuff like youtube videos and other outside sources that explain it but I haven't been able to find anything legit about conditional love.

Sorry this might be confusing sounding but I really need help because if this doesn't work I might have to completely cut out this person from my life along with all mutual friends and I really want to avoid that but I'm doing all the work here and I'm just so exhausted.

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>my main strengths are problem solving, software design and coding
>apparently IT, CompSci and GameDev fields are oversaturated
what do?

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Hi /adv/ how do I make new online friends after losing all my previous ones?

VERY long story short, due to rumors and petty shit, my group of online friends (All friends for 2+ years) I met through gaming dissipated and were all turned against my one friend and I. After about 6 months of not going on my pc, gaming, or talking to anyone I've resolved to find a new group of friends

No idea where to start. Do any anons have tips for meeting new people online?

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What gender, and rating out of ten?

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By the end of my relationship i got some dark bumps on the base of my shaft.
I'm pretty sure they might be warts. I'll get them checked in a week or two.


My question is, i had a bad breakup with that girl. Pretty shit one. I was madly in love, and she also talked about being so in love etc and i knew she was, but she was quite drama and last months were horrible. She would fight all the time. She broke up by provoking fight after fight till i said something not very nice and use that to break up.
Anyways, i noticed these bumps last two weeks with her. Been together for a year. Hadn't touched any other girl half year before being with her.

On the other hand i hadn't ever thought she could have cheated or anything. And i still 99 % don't think so ... Gut feeling.

But at the same time it eats me thinking about it and i don't know that to say to her, or if i even should or am i just writing to get a reaction from her?

Once i get it confirmed, if it's ANY kind of STD. Should i say:

1-nothing. Get it fixed and never think of it again.

2-tell her what i got and tell her to get checked as well . That's it "hey, i noticed i got blabla, and the doctor says it's blabla. You should check with your doctor too "
If she didn't cheat she might think i did. If she did she will wonder if i think she did?

3-indirectly suggest it but dont accuse. Maybe something like: "hey, last weeks with you i noticed i had blabla, but couldn't check them till now. I hadn't been with any girl but you for the past year and a half until you broke up. I'm not going to ask how i got them, just letting you know you should get checked"

4-accuse directly, but don't think i should

5-??? Any better ideas?

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Surprise!! You're having a baby (or your partner is)

You have to choose one male and one female name. What do you choose?

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So, tomorrow is my last day of my first semester in college. I have been doing my best in school, and honestly, I am not a good student, i'm average at best, at worst, a C or D student. My family wants me to do my best,and I do, but I found out today I may have failed one of my classes. Tomorrow I have my final for my history class, and I am failing that class too. And for my English class, maybe, but let's just say I did fail English as well.

I have failed three out of my four classes. I am on financial aid,and after tomorrows exam, I am afraid to come home to my family. I am not the only one who has been to college. My older brother has and finished school, his graduation in next week. My cousin is also finishing up school and this Saturday is his graduation. I am the youngest children here who is attending college and I pretty much failed my first semester. My older brother and cousin never failed any of their classes.

I'm afraid /adv/. I'm having trouble breathing, knowing I failed. My family isn't well off, we're middle class, but because of my financial aid, I know we're going to have to pay back all the money I wasted for those three classes. Maybe two incase I pass English. My family expects great things from me, and seeing how my brother is, he's way better off then I am. He is better in almost every single way possible. I'm just the fuck up child in the family. At 18, I have managed to already fuck up my start to college and now will face the consequences. I'm not telling my family until tomorrow about any of this. I'm considering not coming home tomorrow either, until maybe 8 or 9 at night. I don't want to disappoint my family any more, and yet I already have.

This isn't a "i'm gonna kill myself" thread, I need help. What do I do ? Are things going to get better for me? Am I just a fuck up? Please, help. Help.

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I am going to die a virgin, I am okay with this.
My family is not.
How do i get them to accept this?

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Hey, /adv/! What are some good gift ideas to give to a romantic guy that you've been seeing for only three months?

>He's rich, has all the regular gamer stuff besides new consoles (I can't afford)

The only idea I have that could be taken seriously is to make a CD of me singing/playing covers of his favorite songs (all the dumb romantic ones, especially since he loves female singers) but I want to do something more for him.

The thing is, I know that he will probably get me something expensive (since he said he wanted to) and I just can't reciprocate, and I wish I could so much. I'm really at a loss here. :s

Any help would mean the world to me.

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If I'm a guy and I wear loose jeans without a belt and wear a thong underneath. If I go to Victoria secret's and bend over the whole time do you guys dare me to do this.

What will all the girls think? Would they circle me like sharks haha

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Guys I'm confused. Maybe I can get some of your opinions to help me out.

I'm 24, prior US military, no degree, currently work doing Armed Security making great money. But i'm not satisfied with that job. The whole job hunt is stressful. the competition is crazy and my list of jobs i can apply to is very limited. Its not about the money to me. I just want a job I care about. I'm never going to get married or have kids. So i don't really have shit to live for 2bh. I just want a job i can focus on and care about. Below is 2 options that I could potentionally have. I just can't decide what to do.

1. A friend of mine works for a large, local Energy company. It's known to be a really good company to work for. They pay great, take great care of their employees, and overall just have very good ratings and reviews. My friend showed me a entry level position as a Groundman that the starting pay is almost identical to what i'm making now ($25/hr). Its all on the job training, and after a 1-2 years you can certify to be a Linesman. If you pass the certification your pay jumps to $37-39/hr. Which is obviously great. So there is that option.

2. My second option is i could hope and pray that the one job i really want, (Federal Air Marshal) opens up in the next few months like there is talk about. That job seems ideal to me because its constant travel, gov benefits, and i like shooting guns. Problem is its extremely competitive. But i have a plus because i have a Security clearance, and suitability with that Agency because of my current job. *note- my BEST bet to get hired for Federal Air Marshal would be while i'm still employed with my current company. Because i'll lose my agency specific suitability if i quit, and that can take months to get.


Continued...

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I've never been able to deal with life issues well. I've always done well in school and whatnot, however I've never been good at dealing with life issues.

Whenever somethings troubling me, I sit there and I think and I think and I think, but I come up blank, so naturally my next step is to seek help from my loved ones. While I recognize there's nothing wrong with asking for help, I feel like relying on others this much is really unhealthy.

Maybe it's because I grew up as what was essentially an only child (A have a half sister and a step brother who lived on and off with me and my parents growing up, however I'm significantly younger than them so they were always really nice to me) so I may of never developed proper problem solving/conflict resolution skills (In fact, in kindergarden to about grade 2 my social skills were so poor I had to take special classes to develop them properly), however I can't help but feel like there's something more at play here.

I can provide examples if needed.

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so my gf is going to move aways with her mother to new york. she wants me to go with her. thats the other side of the country. i don't think her mother lilkes me too much. me and my gf have minimum wage jobs and live with our parents. Im not sure if i should go or not. I hate it here in this shit town but at least its safe right. I just don't know. I don't want her to leave either. any adviice ??

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I've been in a weird borderline emotionally abusive relationship the last 2 years.

If I think about it logically I have no reason to stay, and I should have left a long time ago but I stick around and I crave him and want to be with him. I have no idea why I do this, I love myself, and I think I'm pretty decent looking and smart and I know I could get another boyfriend yet I still fucking stay.

How do people get out of these things? Weve tried breaking up a few time and we ALWAYS go back.

and just a note* by abusive I didn't mean he calls me names or anything I just mean hes throwing me around emotionally and constantly says things he "dosnt mean" and then takes them back and its confusing and it helps keep me around.

sometime I really think me and him could get married and belong together but other days I KNOW that that will never happen and if it did it wouldn't work out.

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Am I the only straight man that thinks that vaginas are disgusting?

I'm a straight man, but I am turned on by a woman's face, her figure, breasts, legs, etc. When it comes to the vagina, it's just a big turn off in terms of visual attractiveness (outies in particular).

It does feel great and all, I can obviously concede that, but I find it odd that people look at picture of vaginas and get turned on by them, while I find them so gross.