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I'm not ok, you guys. I have been feeling pretty fucking depressed since a long time now, and even while I try shit just doesn't get better, not even in the slightest. I feel like I'm a burden to everyone around me, as if I just making things worse by existing. I'd be lying if suicidal thoughts haven't entered my mind (I had an attempt a couple years back) and I'm scared shitless of what I could do the next time things just get to me.
I have economic problems, can't seem to hold on to a job, my GF is fucking mad at me almost everyday because I dragged her into this mess, I feel like I don't have any friends.
I don't know what to do, but I needed to get it out of my chest to someone that'd hear it. Do you have any advice? Someone who went through the same thing, how did you cope?
I'm running out of ideas to make myself feel better, to improve myself. If you could just give me some tips, I'd be very thankful.
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Hey dude.
Take a deep breath. Breathe.
It kinda seems like you need a break from everyone. Your gfs shitty mood is going to stress you out. There are no sure fire ways to fix a person, but there are things you can try.
Exercise, changing your diet and working hard.
I'm sorry I'm not the best at advice, but I hope something works for you.
I'm sorry.
Best wishes OP.
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Here are a few things I find helpful when things are rough
-avoid listening to music that makes you sad or emotional.
-Make sure you are eating well, getting all the right nutrition and make sure you get enough sleep
Take some time each day, maybe like 15-30 minutes to just go somewhere quiet on your own, take some deep breaths and lie down.
-Make a list of all the things you have that you are thankful for, try and make it as large as possible
-remember that in the end it will be probably be fine
-Do exercise. Not only does it actually make you feel better, but it will take your mind off things, and you'll be more fit by the end of it.
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Okay. I'm shitty with words right now and not particularly sober, but, hopefully I don't fuck up too bad. So, I've been talking to this kid online for a little while (roughly eight months? Also, I say kid, but she's 16, she's just a kid in comparison to me- I'm 24.) and she's real great and all, but semi-recently she got fairly fucking wasted and confessed a bunch of shit to me, including the fact that she's in a fucking terrible abusive family, (although she never actually said abusive and got really defensive when I did- just talked about her parents hitting her and usually not letting her eat and shit) and that sometime last year, she was raped. Just a bunch of fuckery, plus I know she's got depression, if not a bunch of other stuff. I'd be surprised if she didn't have a bunch of other mental problems after living in such a fucked up home for so long, but, anyways.
She really beats herself up over this stuff and totally believes it's her fault and all, and while I've been trying to convince her that it isn't and that no one deserves it, and especially not her since she's such a fucking nice person, but I can tell she really doesn't believe me. I'm at a loss for what to do and how to get it through to her. I've been depressed, yeah, bur just because I was a fucking loser in school and shit. She's got a whole other can of worms and I really don't know how to go about helping her at all. I can't even really call the cops about the abusive shit since she's in a different country than I am(She's US, I'm Norway) and she's got a sibling that I know she cares about a lot, so I don't think she'd ever be willing to just leave, so there's not much I can think of to help her situation at all, other than maybe trying to get through to her that it's not her fault and shit. Does anyone have any advice or maybe experience in helping someone in a similar situation to her?
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Jesus, I wrote a fucking book. But I'm gonna ask the additional question about how abuse cases are handled in the US? Like, if I were to call and report it and it was proved or whatever, what happens next? Are her parents arrested, is she taken into government foster care stuff?
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>>18624139
Your call might not amount to anything. Sometimes it takes multiple calls or reports before anything is done. After that a state department will perform an investigation. The investigation strongly depends on interviews with the children or multiple provable pieces of evidence (repeated hospital trips, teachers or therapists reporting unusual injuries or absences, etc.). If there isn't a pretty solid case and she doesn't want her family split, it isn't happening. If it does happen, the parents may or may not receive charges (most likely not), the children will be taken away, and put into the system. Foster care is frequently worse than the original situation in the U.S. (this is what happens when you financially incentivize people to adopt children) and quite often separate the children. Mind you this is not to say that all foster parents are horrible and foster agencies do try to keep siblings together, but it is not always feasible. Those are the risks.
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>>18624225
Christ, that sounds like hell. So I don't have much way to legitimately help her without risking her being put in a way worse situation?
Hi adv,
Im seeying slight hairloss at the corners of my head. What products are proven to work? Money is no issue aslong it aint no hair transplantation
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>>18624115
None. Cut your hair down short and maybe save up for a hair transplant if it really is that important for you.
Good luck OP.
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>>18624115
You have corners to your head? You must be a real square.
There's a good chance I'm going to get my first kiss soon with this girl that's made out with probably 2 people. I keep feeling really intimidated, like I'm going to have to prove myself to her since she's already become so good at being intimate with other people.
How do I get over this fear, /adv/? How do I become comfortable with kissing and becoming intimate with her?
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She won't care. No girl would dump a guy because their first kiss wasn't up to her standards. My first kiss was with a girl who's kissed several other dudes and she was very instructive on how to improve - less tongue, more forceful, move your lips etc. In the end she told me I got much better, so that will build your confidence more than anything.
If it's your first kiss there won't be much to it anyway - just a peck on the lips, no tongue - so there's not much you could do wrong.
Now leave this board and don't come back until you're 18.
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>>18624054
Thanks anon. That makes a lot of sense. I'm really close friends with the girl, too, so I don't know what I was worried about.
Anonymous
Complicated Relationship, I screwed the pooch 2017-08-15 07:18:59 Post No.18624036
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Complicated Relationship, I screwed the pooch 2017-08-15 07:18:59 Post No.18624036
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Complicated Relationship, I screwed the pooch
Anonymous
2017-08-15 07:18:59
Post No. 18624036
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How bad of an asshole am I?
Part 1
> Be me, meet girl we'll call her D, I'm in my late 20s, she's early 20s.
> I'm her first love, first sex partner, first everything.
> Now she is by no means a 10/10
> Her personality is 5/10, her looks 6/10
> Over protective, super jealous, and zero motivation
> I'm easily a 7-8/10 personality with 7/10 looks
> So D has this friend, we'll call her Y.
> They've been friends since High school, still hang out once in a while
> when I started dating D, Y was also dating someone
> But deep down I always felt I choose the wrong girl
> Y was everything I was looking for, but she was taken as was I.
> 2 yrs later Y breaks up with her BF
> I'm still dating D, but we aren't connecting on anything
> I ask to spice things up in bed, but D is lazy and remains a starfish
> I never get any bjs, sex is me doing all the work
> D starts eating more, gaining weight and starts looking for excuses to not work out with me
> Y finishes University, D gets placed on probation.
> I'm fallen out of love with D a yr or more ago, at this point I'm just with her to not hurt her
> I decided to settle
> I had chances to cheat with random skanks, but I turned them down.
> I want kids now, D wants to finish school before kids
> I want to go back to school, D freaks out about losing time with me
> For almost 3 years we've hung out every weekend, despite me insisting for her to have ladies night
> I feel overwhelmed and suffocated
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Part 2
> 1 month from 3 yr anniversary with D, and me and Y start talking more
> I notice neither one of us tells D we are talking
> at a social gathering me and Y just sit and talk, relax
> Talking leads to texting, texting lead to role playing, and role playing lead to dirty snaps
> after a couple days of being on the ropes I knew it was wrong, I was with D and Y was her one of her best friends
> But it was Y, I fell in love with her 3 yrs ago, we never talked but I always asked about her
> Me and Y met up around 9pm on night and we talked, walked around, started making out, and lastly we slept together.
> It was amazing, she smelled amazing, we went at it for 40 mins in the back of my car.
> went to get food afterwards, and talked till 2am despite both of us having work in the morning
> it was an amazing night, we shared stuff about each other, I told Y stuff I never told D
> that night I told D I was taking a nap, I never texted her back, this was a Wed
> the following night, on a Thursday, I'm still dating D, but me and Y both agree this is just about sex
> Y and D hang out and go to a festival. I didn't go, I stayed home.
> At the end of the night their ride bails so Y suggests D should call me to take them to their cars.
> Y is texting me the whole time so I know what she wants, D is refusing saying I'll get mad
> almost 3 years and I rarely got mad at D
> Finally D calls me up and asks I pick them up
> I pick them up and the whole time I kept looking at Y and smiling, she was in the backseat
> When I drop them off D goes to kiss me and I instinctively pulled back, but I realized what I did and went in to kiss her.
> D wants to call me from her car to talk, I decline saying my throat hurts
> As I'm driving away Y texts me if I left, I hadn't I drove around the block and was texting Y to drive to me
> we made out again and slept together in my car.
> D got home fast and was perplexed how she lives further but beat us both home
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Part 3
> By this point me and Y are starting to text more. I'm texting D less and less. Y admits she got a little jealous when she saw me kiss D. I admit it felt wrong
> For a couple days me and Y are texting, Y feels bad thinking I want to break up with D.
> I explain I've been wanting to break up with her for a while.
> I explain I don't consider myself switching Y for D, even if me and Y don't work out I still wasnt planning on staying with D.
> Y decides we should avoid hanging out until I break up with D
> This was Friday, after work D wants to hang out, I decide I didn't want to. I didn't want to make Y jealous
> Y swears she doesn't care D is still my gf. I insist its fine and I stay home alone
> On Saturday
> Me and Y are still texting and staying up late. Think we were also talking on the phone
> I worked so I didn't go to the beach with D and Y and the rest of their friends
> After work, I go home
> When the beach thing is over D wants to come over, I tell her I'm going to take a nap. I stay up texting Y
> 1 hr later I text D I'm awake but don't feel well to hang out.
> D shows up anyways crying saying she wanted to hangout
> we have a big argument in her car, I explain I'm exhausted and didn't want to spend time with her
> D is crying, makes me upset to see her cry. I ask her to go home
> D doesn't go home, she goes directly to Y's place and cries over there
> Y doesn't text me with all this happening, I feel bad for Y knowing she must feel bad and guilty
> Eventually D goes home, Y checks in on me and is worried about me.
> She kind of hints I can fix things with D if I wanted to, I explain its too late. I care about her, but I don't love her and want to be with her.
> we change subject, I was worried it was making Y feel bad
> we joke Sun is the last day of festival and we didn't get to go on rides
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Lastly Part 4
> On Sunday
> a day later me and Y decide to go to the festival to go on the rides
> D hates the rides, but loves the food. I hate the food and love the rides, Y feels the same
> So we go to the festival, have a great time, but the whole time Y was paranoid we would run into someone they know
> Eventually it gets dark and Y is more comfortable, we have a great time and go on lots of rides
> We were holding hands the whole time, I hugged her when we stopped, it was incredible until
> D starts blowing up my phone, I told her I was going to my brothers place and to give me space
> She called my brothers wife and starts worrying and texting me and calling me non stop
> I ended up turning off my phone.
> Y got a little up tight, torn between seeing me stress over D calling me, and at the same time she feels bad knowing its cause of her
> 15 mins later
> After the festival, me and Y sleep together again. making it the 3rd time
> Once we go home I return D's call.
> She was asleep
> we talk, we fight, I explain to her I don't see a future with her.
> She asks if I can say I love her, I tell her I can't
> She still wants to work it out, she wants me to give us another chance.
Me and Y know we fucked up, she thinks I'm perfect, and I think she's perfect
> We both want kids soon
> She is exactly what I was looking for body wise, face wise, personality wise
> D was always bitchy and judgmental, whereas Y is sweet and her soul feels closer to mine
> Y is sad because she is going to lose D and their group of friends
> I feel terrible about causing this trouble
> But at the same time I feel I would make the same mistake, just to be with Y
No chance of not breaking up the group. Just wanting to vent and have you guys listen. Thank you for reading.
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I told a lady that her boyfriend showed me and a friend her nudes without her knowing. Did I do the correct thing?
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you definitely didn't do the wrong thing.
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>>18624032
>being this much of a faggot
yea OP you sound like a real pal
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>>18624032
You probably accelerated the eventual breakup of that relationship but if you're expecting the fair maiden to grant you her handkerchief you shouldn't hold your breath.
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I ran away from home from my abusive alcoholic mother. She called 911 drunk and now they're most likely going to put me in an orphanage. My life is falling apart right now. Can any anons who have been in similar situations share some insight? I don't know how to cope with this. I've kinda almost made peace with being put in a home, but I still feel hopeless.
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>>18624028
>be me
>have abusive alcoholic mother
>mother gets DCFS called on her after hospitalizing me
>sister and I talk and decide to lie and keep family together
>have to lie a lot DCFS knows whats up
>enough lying and they stop pushing
>mother gives up on raising kids and pulls me out of school to raise them
>I do a good job
>kids are great, my life is a trainwreck
>still trying to catch up with people who are younger than me
>now fast approaching 30
>starting bachelor's
>I would have been better in a home, siblings wouldn't have been
>still don't know how to cope with any of this other than make my life better
>emotionally fucked and trying to work on that
There's no really easy answers to this. The situation decides a lot. I am glad that I saved three lives from getting fucked up even if it meant fucking mine up. Eventually I'll fix it. If you feel a home is the better option, take it. If you don't, get ready to lie through your teeth. Either way expect emotional baggage that most will never understand, but will also try to tell you how much worse they had it.
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>>18624057
Hope things get better for you.
A home is my only option, because my only family here is my grandmother, and the cpc don't usually let them take kids.
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>>18624070
I hope they do to. I keep trying. Brace yourself homes aren't fun or easy, but it is better than being abused. Be smart, play your cards right, you aren't going to have a support net until you build one yourself.
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Hi. I have an eating disorder but my doctor doesn't know, will he be able to tell I haven't been eating just by taking my vitals tomorrow? I just finished my third day fasting and don't want to stop.
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>>18623957
how have you managed to conflate eating disorder with fasting? also, why are you cheating your doctor, as well as yourself?
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>>18624001
I'm diagnosed with an eating disorder and I fast to lose weight????
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While I don't plan on taking this into court I have noticed a few things I'd like opinions on.
Due to a handful of charges I did not commit and I'm fighting those myself excellently I am required to take piss tests (even though my charges aren't drug related)
Today I took one and noticed something. The office the court has a contract with has their licenses displayed like many do and the doctor's license Expired in January of this year.
I don't do drugs each test comes back negative for everything and it's really a waste of time and money.
Do you think with this realization of expired credentials I could either refuse the tests legally with out repercussion or secondly sue the state or company for sending me/testing under an expired license and false pretenses I am being handled by a medical professional which obviously isn't the case as he is displaying.
Discuss
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>>18623951
Criminal, civil or family court?
Parole, probation, pending, diversion?
what the deal OP?
Also, probably not.
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Licences can take a while to turn up due to bureaucracy (literally months), or the business might have forgotten to put the new one up.
Source: my parents run a business that requires a food licence
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>>18623960
Criminal I don't want to get into it too deep since its still ongoing but one of the charges is loitering and prowling and when approached I was on my property.
they're trying to pin s burglary on me but my house was one broken into.
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What can I do for fun just on YouTube or something? I have 2 hobbies producing music and growing weed and I already beat it to death I've done it so much that those are the only things I do or research in my free time now and I can't think of a single thing to do when I'm just chilling out and I hate tv.
Whenever I sit alone I just either listen to music which is pretty much studying to me or I look up videos on how to do my hobbies or I'm doing them but I'm sick of it. I just want something stress free that I don't have to worry about. I tried just relaxing and I just ended up looking up what drugs do to your brain so it was just more learning and stress. I only have one game on my laptop runescape and even that sucks and is just stressful and boring.
I just want to have mindless fun I don't wanna work out or do a hobby or study my shit anymore I just want something I can enjoy like on YouTube or something I don't really like video games anymore. It's so hard for me to do anything pointless all I can worry about is my future and being able to make as much money as possible and freelance in jobs. I like pool but I don't have a table and I want something I can just do sitting at home alone bored in my bed or something.
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>>18623935
what do you do for freelance
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>>18623935
Fold 1000 paper cranes. If still bored after, fold 1000 more but faster and better. If still bored fold 1000 more but... You get where this is going, right?
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>>18623935
Haha, oh man, imagine not liking video games.
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Im terrified about leaving my 2 weeks notice.
Previously when I left my jobs, I just quit going. This time I want to leave the proper way and leave a notice.
A week ago I got my new scheduling approved for school, but one day where I have my training for an academic program they didnt let me have the day off (13 day notice). Im not sure why they didn't give me the day off as I rarely see my direct boss. Either way it is clear that I cant work two jobs and do school. I told them previously that I wouldn't quit once school starts.
Im just going to give my 2 weeks to the hiring manager before my shift. And I am just worried that my coworkers or boss is going to be pissed or something for my last 2 weeks. They dont have that many people in my position and it would put them in a slight bind.
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>>18623929
I can see you're scared of bitching about the schedule again but its probably a better first idea than putting in 2 weeks notices.
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>>18623958
My other job has a static schedule and it is at my university. The reason I got this job was because I couldnt work during the summer.
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For the record I have only been at this job for 3 months.
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Currently have HR degree from community college and work as an HR assistant and its not my thing.. wanna get into the Training and Developement side of it. Would getting a BA in Educational studies be a practical degree for that taking into consideration I have a AAS in HRM?
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>>18623925
People like you disgust me. How about going for a job/degree that actually produces something that the general population wants?
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You cant be serious..
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>>18623925
Why not try and get into that side with your current employer? Ask them what the requirements are for you working there and if they have a position open.
See where that takes you.
Good luck OP.
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be me : an American lived in Uruguay 7 yrs. ex gf of 5 yrs. ago, comes back to uy. from brasil ((seduces me)), then bangs me... My question is, why do you think she did that??? FYI she cheated on me.
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>>18623891
She was horny and you were an easy sex-target for her. Don't chase after her if she's already cheated on you.
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thanks anon
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just some doubts. ty
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Ok 4Chan I have a question.
If an escort is technically a prostitute, and I slept with someone who used to be an escort, does that mean I technically slept with a prostitute?
Or does it not count because I didn't pay.
Help me out here degenerates.
ty
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>>18623879
If you didn't pay for it, no, not a prostitute. You just banged a really slutty whore. Might wanna get yourself checked for any STD if you didn't wrap up
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>>18623879
>does that mean I technically slept with a prostitute?
Why do you care...?
There isn't an official rule to this. Some would say yes and others no.
>Help me out here degenerates.
Ok ouch?
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>>18623879
You're not very bright. The law never says anything about sleeping with prostitutes, it's engaging in prostitution, which is soliciting sexual favors for monetary compensation
Yes, you slept with a prostitute, but you didn't engage in prostitution
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looking for advice
>Needed to sublease an apartment at beginning of this summer
>found someone
>i needed to move fast and it would have taken 3 for the apartment place to "inspect" the apartment and get the forms in order (+350 dollar sublease fee)
>he let me move in without signing anything (his stuff was already gone)
>i lived there for 3 months while paying directly to him, not ever signing a sublease form or anything. so the apartment place didnt know i was living there
>this was fine until the last month, when they started doing inspections (fire alarms, etc) and the manager realized what was going on
>i had already paid the guy the last months rent, so i was basically done paying anything and was planning on moving out at the end of the month
>i move out, original guy returns the keys and all is done
>get text message from original guy bitching at me saying he got a "termination fee" of 350 dollars because the manager changed the lease to my name for the last like 2 weeks after seeing me a bunch of times
>he wants me to pay the 350 dollars for him because he "doesnt feel responsible for it"
whos in the right here? i think he should be on the line because he didn't pay the original sublease fee and this is really all his fault, but to me it doesnt really makes sense to have a termination fee and not just a retroactive sublease fee (which neither of us paid)
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Ignore him. He's the one who didn't do shit properly, and the fee has been charged to him. He's not going to pursue you for it, it wouldn't be worth it and he really has no case either.
Just make sure that you don't have to pay some sort of termination fee yourself.
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>>18623833
Girl here, tell him to fuck himself. Block his number, it's his fault for trying to go behind the owners backs
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>>18623833
If you havent signed anything he cant do shit about it.
Just type its not your problem for him agreeing on you preposition while it suited him also even though problems might occure with HIS manager.
Then block the bitch if he makes some bs excuses or harrases you for it.That way you have mssges to back you up.He agreed for it, hes problem now.