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Recently I've been struggling with desires to cheat on my girlfriend. I love her, which is why I feel conflicted, but I think being long distance just makes a part of my brain long for that physicality. Adding to the difficulty is the fact that in past relationships, I've cheated on the girl and she's never found out, making me want to do it again. Part of my mind says "you're young and sex is kinda fun" but the other says "don't be a shithead". Any recommendations?
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bumping for confusion
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>>17132655
Ohh i feel ya. 4 year relationship and some days i just see a cute girl and can only think of having rough sex with her. Like a primal urge to just fuckkk
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>>17132738
But you've never acted on it? I just get so frustrated with how easy it is now with Tinder and the like. I could probably bone someone tonight if I put forth the effort. I just don't really know if it's worth it.
Anonymous
Generic I Need Relationship Advice Thread 2016-05-11 14:18:00 Post No.17132640
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Generic I Need Relationship Advice Thread
Anonymous
2016-05-11 14:18:00
Post No. 17132640
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Hey /adv/! Thanks in advance for taking the time to read this thread. I just want some different viewpoints on a circular issue I'm having in my relationship and maybe some way to possibly repair it. I have been dating this girl for about 15 months and things have been pretty good all and all save for a few rough patches. The problem is I have always felt I've given more in this relationship. I'm not a beta type personality and I don't worship women. When it comes to my relationships I try to treat the other person how I think they wish to be treated. The only problem is I don't really feel like that's reciprocated much in my relationship.
A recurring issue in our relationship is her inability to stand up for me to her parents. Which are very old fashion and controlling over her life. The amount of compromises I have made for this are innumerable, but I will try to list a few notable examples.
I had to move next door to her and now pay 600~ in living expenses just to live near her as we were 45 minutes apart before and her parents forbid us to live together as it would be "living in sin". I have had to maintain a fulltime job and not continue my studies in school due to this. She has full financial support from her parents and is having most of her school paid for by them so thats cool. I can understand she doesn't want to rock the boat but thats kind of showing of her priorities and I think about it a lot. I've had to put up with the uptightness of her parents and their expectations of me. I don't really behave like myself around them and neither does she. She has said a lot of bad stuff about me in the past to her parents when we were going through a hard time so her perspective of her parents is grossly skewed as she left out many details of her own participation in the issues. I am really just waiting on her to finish college my whole life is on hold for this girl. I love her and she's a fantastic person but I feel like she
>cont
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>>17132640
isn't very appreciative of me. Not in the "Stacy" pretty bitch sense, but in the sense that she's a self centered millenial and can't take it upon herself to comprimise. Her family is running our major relationship decisions and its getting worse. I wanted to attend her Dr. appointment with her today and I wasn't allowed because her mother decided she didn't want me there. She has Lymes disease and I spend a lot of my time trying to keep her eating the right foods for her diets and make sure she's healthy but I am not fitting to visit the doctor? It's coming to a boiling point with me and I'm tired of discussing it I love this girl with all my heart but my biggest fear is I will have to walk away from her. She would be absolutely crushed but she's been way too unreliable and frankly I'm really pissed she's wasting all this time on a BA in forensic psychology just to cling to me with my "stupid mans job" once I get into a plumbing apprenticeship program.
I'm getting very depressed spend all my life working or playing WoW I have no social life because I moved out to a different city where I thought I would be integrated but ultimately I was spurned by her parents. I have an ok relationship with her parents they just secretly fucking sabatoge me when I'm not around and I'm so fucking over it.
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>>17132645
The most major one was I had to bury the hatchet on a debacle where they thought my GF got bed bugs (they were rampant in ohio at the time) I am from a notoriously low income area although I only moved there a few yrs ago. The parents immediately assumed I was the culprit and treated me like utter shit. They had this huge panic (her mom is an anxiety ridden co-dependant so ye.txt) and fingers were not so subtly pointed. I tried to ignore her parents but they were so belligerent. They wound my GF into a huge anxious bundle and she has really bad issues with anxiety as it is. I had enough at this point and confronted it. All I really asked was who was thinking about how femanon felt. I was met with a response from her father "you're going down a path you don't wanna go down with me." I essentially just stared at him with a blank stare because I was unsure what to do at this point. My rational side was like just let it go but my more primal side was enraged. I didn't speak for the rest of the visit and this was AFTER I cleaned out her entire room moved all her furniture to the garage and moved every piece of clothes to the laundrymat and ran them through the industrial dryers I DID ALL THIS OUT OF THE GOODNESS OF MY HEART WHILE BEING ACCUSED OF BEING A FUCKING PLAGUE BEARER! I really am a kind person but I have a boiling point and that day I had hit it and I literally would not speak to her father I had to show great restraint. I addressed the mother about it because the father is one of those "I'm the head of this household" types who cannot be reasoned with. and she just simply reinforced that it was his house whatever thats his wife thats fine. but when all was said and done and the exterminator came out and declared there was no sign of infestation outside of the fact that there were maybe 10 rolley polleys in her room which are what they mistook for bedbugs. I was told simply this. "Well you need to understand this was a stressful time"
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>>17132656
I go home and steam on this for a few days. This is just one infuriating instance of dealing with her fucked in the head parents. They aren't evil people but they have really a really fucked up morality about them. They're kind and generous but they're so fickle and snobby. Just think your average middle class church going family.
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My girlfriend had 39.5 fever, couldn't get out of bed, eat or drink and puked green and black. I called an ambulance despite her telling me not to and menacing me to dump me if I did so. Now her mother and her are angry at me.
Did I do the right thing? Why is love so difficult?
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You did the right thing
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>>17132614
39.5 degrees? She's freezing to death
also you did do the right thing. You can actually go to jail for YEARS if don't do anything and she dies.
If she breaks up with you who cares
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>>17132623
39.5 celsius
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How do I forgive my ex?
I don't want to take her back because she cheated on me but I feel like I need to forgive her to have peace and move on, but I can't stop feeling hatred everytime I think about how disgusting she was
We haven't talked or seen each other in 2 months. Should I talk to her?
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>2 months
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Give it a decade. Having trust broken is deep wound.
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>>17132601
After over a year i still feel pure unadulterated hatred for my ex
I did forgive her once, she took everything for granted and lied about everything until i snapped at her
Find peace for yourself, she deserves none
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>don't talk to anyone and keep to myself
>people think I'm a weirdo sperg school shooter in the making, get "talked to" by officials about how I need to improve
>talk to other people and try to be confident
>make other people visibly uncomfortable, girls in particular show fearful body language and a subdued desire to just run away
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cool tumblr post
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>>17132579
You sound like you a 15 year old asspie with no concept of normal, human interaction. It's cool thogh, just watch another episode of justice league, you'll grow up in a flash.
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>>17132629
>15 year old
>watching justice league
it came out in 2001
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24 year old male.
Went to the gas station the other day, was high as a bitch. Eyes redder than the devils dick.
There was this really cute girl working who complimented me on my shirt, it was of george bush sucking blood out of the statue of liberty. I was gonna go with the "Oh the guy who drew this pic actually drew batman" but I didn't want to sound like a fucking nerd, so my high ass says "Yeah I actually got this from goodwill"
So now I just look like a scrub but the girl was laughing anyways, she was super cute.
But I wanted to get out of there, the entire reason I was at this gas station was because the one I normally would have went to had gotten robbed and there were a bunch of police in it, and there was a man in the store with a tear drop tattoo signifying he had either killed somebody or saw someone die. So I grabbed my cigs and dipped.
I've been thinking about this girl since, and I think i'm going to start going into that gas station more now and next time I see her ask her to get breakfast with me b/c i work 3rd shift. I'm sick of having "What ifs" constantly because I never make a move
First of all, did I already fuck up?
Second of all, is it appropriate to ask girls out at their work place?
Third of all, I have some coupons for this gas station, am I gonna look like more of a scrub if I use these?
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1. No
2. Yes , but you can wait for her to end her shift and ask her out
3. I dont think so
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>there was a man in the store with a tear drop tattoo signifying he had either killed somebody or saw someone die.
lol just how white are you?
>First of all, did I already fuck up?
no
>Second of all, is it appropriate to ask girls out at their work place?
no
>Third of all, I have some coupons for this gas station, am I gonna look like more of a scrub if I use these?
yes
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>>17132575
By the time she ends her shift i'll be working 3rd shift, the gas station is usually dead-ish at this time of night, its a town of about 60,000 and i was in there at 8:30 on a friday, wasn't super busy at all
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Ok I need some advice.
I live in middle east, Iraq to be exact.
Needless to say the security in here is non existent.
I live with my family and my uncle lives next door, with the two houses connected.
The situation is like this
a few months ago a woman in her late thirties, came to my uncle house after his wife died, requesting some money as a charity in the name of his late wife.
His daughter was home with my mother, and invited her in and somehow managed to walk away with 200$.
After asking around no such charity even the place she described didn't exist.
Today she came back, and one of my cousins and my uncle faced her with that the place and the charity didn't exist.
She avoided the questions, So I showed up, and kicked her out.
Was it the right thing what I did?
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>>17132531
Yes.
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>>17132561
I took a few precautions as well.
I wore a baseball cap, came out from my uncle house when I kicked her I said, "Thank you for caring about the orphans, please leave now we have nothing to give you"
In a firm rude way.
Though my family fucked it up by shouting my name.
I suspect she's in some gang watching the house to rob it.
the family is worried that they might retaliate.
Is there bases for their worries?
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>>17132561
Could have been better way to do it?
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How can I help my gf gain self-esteem?
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>>17132490
Post something of her. What's the issue she struggles with?
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>>17132513
She has quite a few issues, to be honest. She thinks she's stupid, incapable and ugly. She's incredibly shy and feels like she never has anything worth saying. She doesn't have the confidence to make a lot of decisions and usually panics until someone else makes the decision for her. She can see that these are problems and that they make her unhappy, but she doesn't think it's worth trying to face them. She cares a lot about other people's wellbeing, but doesn't bother about her own.
She's studying for a PhD at the moment. I think the fact she's got so far academically is pretty good evidence of her intellect, but she's convinced her good grades at uni were purely the result of the help she got and that she was offered the PhD position out of pity. She's afraid she'll fail and works overtime and at weekends to catch up for time she spent panicking, so she doesn't have a lot of downtime.
I'm not sure how much detail you want so I'll stop here for the time being.
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>>17132582
Dunno, man. If that's her outlook on life it probably means you're a 3-4/10 because she feels that's appropriate for a dumb, ugly puppy like her. If she finds out she's a hot genius she may very well dump your ass.
Just stick with being nice to her, and tell her she's a demon in the sack.
Guys, I just realized something.
I am one of those people that constantly try to get compliments, to impress and to make others think I'm good at something. I have this inmature, undesirable, very primitive need for attention. I'm not sure where it's coming from, but it's been creeping on me for some time now. I will break up with girls because they don't meet my quota, I will constantly try to get validation out of people
And the worst thing: Since I think I was secretly conscious about what I was doing, I was doing it in the most subtle, bitch-ass effective ways. Always camouflaged, always subtly asking for attention.
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I would very much appreciate any input on how to detect where it's coming from and grow out of this inmature, undesirable trait and become a proper, confident, complete person.
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>>17132489
Does it directly affect your professional life?
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>>17132498
It very well could affect it. In very subtle, yet real ways, this need for attention could shine through my persona, and make me fundamentally unlikeable. Which is an undesirable route to take when you're trying to fit in, become your coworker's mate, and just retain your position, you know, just do good in it.
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My boyfriend doesnt seem to want to talk to me anymore. Before anyone says it, no I dont think hes cheating on me because he is a shut in who doesn't seem to be interested in people in general.
If it was always like this then I would understand, but for the first few months we were constantly skyping, he was staying up late to talk to me and we would talk about anything and everything. We're ldr but we've seen eachother quite a bit and he spent a few weeks with me recently.
Its like he isnt interested, everytime we talk it feels forced and I'm starting to give up.
I dont know what I can do to try to better the situation.
I've tried talking to him about it, he doesnt seem to think its a problem and puts it back onto me for not coming up with conversation topics. Its almost as if hes gotten too comfortable with me and no longer goes out of his way to talk. Our conversations are basically "what are you up to, cool, I'm going such and such, how was your day?, im going to go play a game now'
He is always playing games, which is fine with me but he doesnt tell me hes going to, so im waiting by my phone for a text message back for an hour.
I just dont know what to do anymore, its to the point that I no longer try to put aside time for skype calls because hes too busy on games, and I dont want to take his mic away while hes raiding or whatever.
Anyone have any adivce that isnt 'dump him!'.
I want to try all possible options before ending something I've commited to because I do love him.
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>boyfriend
This is an internet thing right? You have never met in real life?
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>>17132488
>We're ldr but we've seen eachother quite a bit and he spent a few weeks with me recentl
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Long distance relationships aren't actual relationships, they're just a way to pass time before finding a real connection with someone.
He seems to have known that, why didn't you?
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I was over ar my boyfriend's place and he let me borrow his PC while he was doing something. I was looking up stuff for one of my classes so I opened up his downloads folder and I found porn. Lots of porn. I then checked his browsing history and found shitload of porn sites that he visited almost everyday. I have talked to him about it but since we don't live together and can't have sex regularly I kinda understood and told him it was okay. But I just can't stop thinking about it. It makes me feel like I'm not good enough for him for some reason? He watches porn starring girls that look nothing like me and I'll never be able to look like them even if I tried my hardest because natural huge tits. And that's what turns him on. I don't know what to do. It makes me feel like I'm not enough
I know it's normal because, well, that's just the way it is, I can't always be there. But it just makes me feel down and so fucking anxious and I don't know what to do
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>He faps because he gets horny
>implying you aren't fucking the horny out of him
>implying you have to have sex to get him off
So why aren't you on his dick right now? No need to fap if he's empty.
Either you handle it or he does.
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Porn = fantasy
You = the real thing
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men are such pigs
ugh
Anonymous
Worth driving BMW M4 during winter? 2016-05-11 11:52:28 Post No.17132438
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Worth driving BMW M4 during winter? 2016-05-11 11:52:28 Post No.17132438
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Worth driving BMW M4 during winter?
Anonymous
2016-05-11 11:52:28
Post No. 17132438
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I'm about to buy a BMW M4 but is it worth driving it in the winter?
Any advice?
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Why wouldn't it be?
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>buying any "luxury" vehicle
HAHAHAHAHA
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>>17132702
This. Such an incredible waste of money that serves no purpose other than dickwaving.
>mfw people go into debt for this shit
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I'm a Canadian about to travel to the USA by car in a few weeks.
I'm going from Alberta through Idaho, and going to end up in Portland for a week vacation.
Last year I was arrested(bench warrant) because I didn't pay my "driving without insurance" fine, my friends came and paid it and I was in and out in 8 hours.
I have zero criminal record, but I was still technically "arrested".
Will this be a problem when I cross the border?
What do I say when they ask me if I've ever been arrested?
Also, if you get refused entry, how can you get into the united states?
Do you go through another border crossing?
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>>17132430
If you've been arrested you have a criminal record.
A record doesn't just mean convicted of a crime it means all information pertaining to you in the criminal justice system.
So if you were taken into custody, even without charges, you have to put in an application to Parole Board of Canada to have that information removed.
What to do? Well that's on you. If you say you don't have a criminal record, and you get flagged, you could be arrested again. If you say you do, you could be denied entry. But they also might just let you enter anyway because you've not been convicted of anything.
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best to give them a call for some solid facts.
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>>17132508
>If you've been arrested you have a criminal record.
A bench warrant doesn't count as a criminal record.
>you have to put in an application to Parole Board of Canada to have that information removed.
I heard it's pointless because they don't share that info with the USA.
>you could be arrested again.
What would I be arrested for?
This site:
http://www.ezbordercrossing.com/the-inspection-experience/prior-criminal-offenses/crimes-that-will-make-you-inadmissible-to-the-u-s/#.VzMcuuQuPWE
says:
>Offences like fail to appear, causing a disturbance, common assault and impaired driving are not ordinarily considered in determining your admissibility to the country. In addition, multiple convictions involving crimes which are NOT classified as crimes involving moral turpitude ordinarily do not block your entry.
This may sound like the dumbest problem to have but I really struggle with it and need some guidance /adv/. Recently my female best friend found out her husband cheated on her. Shortly after she confessed to me she's been in love with me for 5 years. This keeps happening. Every friend I get close to falls for me and ends up leaving/resenting me for not returning the feelings. The worst part is I feel like they build me up and put me on the pedestal I can never live up to anyways. I am nothing speculator looks wise and I'm mentally crazy/emotional. But I feel like I'm going to be stuck alone forever because no one wants to be my friend. This is the second female best friend to do this. Last time she ended up hating me and we haven't talked in ages. I don't think I'm gay but I do absolutely love my best friend. I think she's beautiful and we get along like I never have with anyone else. But I feel like she's just reacting to her husband cheating(even though she assures me that's not it). I don't want to reject her while she's still going through being cheated on. But I don't want to feed into it and lead her on either. I keep thinking if I had just gone for either of these girls I would be treated so well and know we would always be happy. But am I gay? I have never been with a woman and I love men. I mean I'm pretty old fashioned and pro gender roles. What do I do? How do I make friends that won't fall for me? I'm not even worthy of any of these people it makes me feel like a fraud.
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>>17132427
Let her watch you suck a few dicks. She'll lose interest.
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>>17132427
>How do I make friends that won't fall for me?
This is such an adorable little attention whore question I just had to highlight it.
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>>17132553
I'm not an attentionwhore at all. It's an honest question. I don't have many friends and when I do get close to one the same thing happens.
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Is there actually a way to make your dick longer without getting surgery pls help
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use a vacuum 30 min a day for a year if you want solid results.
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Cocksleeve? How big are you?
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No. Even surgery doesn't really work: the result looks bigger, but doesn't work like one of that size should.