tfw no yoichi bf
ITT: Things that pull the trigger.
>>38380702
originaloideqwerty
>>38380702
well if that dont activate your almonds
>Apply for the Army
>Recruiter tells me to practice for the aptitude test online
>Bombarded with math questions and times tables
>Realize I'm too stupid to figure this out and begin getting nervous
Haha it's okay I didn't want to join anyways...
This girl me and my wife grew up with has a weird story
>She was this emo girl, molested by her grandpa and lived with her grandma
>She was always pretty crazy but all my friends were
>Anyway fast forward and she dates this guy from middle school into high school
>lost track of her after I moved to college then found out about her later
>her bf sat at home playing video games and met a guy online called Brandon
>the bf got the girl to play video games with him and Brandon
>Brandon took a liking to the girl and asked the bf about her more and more
>finally the bf pretty much handed the girl off to Brandon
Fucking paid for her to go to Illinois and gave her money clothes and food for like a starter pack
>she now lives with this weird ass Brandon guy that her ex pawned her off on
>they have a baby and since then Brandon won't touch the girl at all even though she's still super hot
>she tries hard, even goes down on him at night or plays with him but he always pushes her off
>then turns around and whacks off to porn
He decided they needed to start having an open relationship
>the girl is bisexual so she now has a male and female fuck buddy since their relationship is open
>Brandon broke her phone because she's having sex and he isn't
Lost track of her again until she contacts my wife lol. Waiting for more of the saga
Going to bump again for more story viewing
>>38507250
This is really depressing desu.
Origattoni
>>38508191
Why is that
Originalus
Why do they always have hooked noses?
because evolution and breeding made them have hooked noses you fuckwit
>>38380683
Because they are a semitic people. They are descended from Lot and his 2 daughters who raped their father by making him drunk. They are the offspring. That is why Asians look weird, they have a lot of inbreeding in their bloods. When your parent does a certain behavior your descendants are more likely to act the same way.
please respond with a unique comment in this thread
I watched zootopia today. It was good.
I made out with a drunk girl yesterday, she is a hoe I've known for a while now, not sure if she enjoyed it
>>38507291
inb4 a bunch of virgins ask why you care if she enjoyed it or not
Whatsup fellow virgin robots, today I paid a girl off craigslist a 100 dollars to take a snapchat pic with me in bed, where it looked like we were just chilling together (half naked, suggesting we had sex), the pic came out very natural. A couple girls from my university actually messaged me asking who it was, this confirms my theory that you become interesting to girls when they think you are attractive to other girls.
My question is: could you guys think of any other scenario I could take a picture of that makes it look like I am attractive to other girls? I want to expand my scheme.
>>38380653
If true, this is just really sad. Save your money dude.
>>38380653
>A couple girls from my university actually messaged me asking who it was, this confirms my theory that you become interesting to girls when they think you are attractive to other girls.
They probably wondered who would fuck a virgin like you. I'd probably ask the same thing if I knew you. Don't look too far into it, and stop wasting your money on useless shit.
>>38380707
Why would they wonder, why would they even give a fuck to send me a message if they weren't at least slightly intrigued?
Is this peak masculinity? Is this guy taking super male vitality
>>38507173
>You will never be raped every day by Tyronette while chained in her basement.
>She will never forcefully feed you hormones and get you sex reassignment surgery so she can fill your manmade cunt with her black seed.
Feels bad.
Q: Why do black traps look so convincing?
A: Black women are already masculine.
>>38507173
>510
wtf this is my area code
that tranny could be filling my boyholes within the next 24 hours
WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS!!!
REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Zr5qzV-8Zkc
>>38380629
Yeah, you're a little late to the party. We REEEEE'd about this a while ago.
>>38381657
thank you. Im a transphile and dont really like men.
tfw your instagram crush has a boyfriend and you consider turning to real life girls, but realize how much of an effort it is, so you spend ours finding a new waifu on insta.
I want to text a special girl that I really like but I'll be a sucker if she's with another guy. She's a self-described whore, this is hopeless. I should really just stop thinking about dating her
>>38380700
Do it, maybe it works maybe it doesn't otherwise you're just wasting your time on thoughts.
>>38380805
I want to but I already know the answer if I confess. That's what torments me:( the two things she told me on our first hangout was that she was a whore and that I had to be able to keep it casual. I think she knows anyways, she acts out of character, sweet, towards me. I'm about to be dumped by someone who I'm not dating
I'm getting reoccurring nightmares thinking about her with other guys. This is soul-crushing stuff, don't enter anything casual if you can help it
I've realized I'll always be fat.
It doesn't matter how hard I try, I'm too weak and hungry. No matter how much I eat I'm always hungry making dieting very difficult. I try to run often and eat under 1600 calories a day, but what's the point. I'll be ugly regardless of how fit I am, I don't care for my health since I want to die, and the only pleasure in my life is food. Working out has never made me happier, it only took away the only source of happiness in my life and no matter how fit I am I'm still lonely.
>>38380597
You sound like a schizo. You lament being fat but then say you don't care because you'll be ugly anyway so you don't want to lose weight. Make up your mind
Get gastric balloon procedure if you are worried about eating and portion size. And if it is such a big deal to you (and are not a wagecuck or a wizard) save up for liposuction.
>>38380781
>just pay for life-endangering surgery since you lack will power
kek
>just put yourself out there and apply bro, you don't need any connec-
>Handshake(1) required.
>>38507130
>1 employer reference and 3 "professional" references
Anon come on..
>>38507192
Explain, shitstain.
Wondering whether this is gay
If there's two pee wees in the picture without a pair of bobangas then chances are that it's gay
>>38380593
>Wondering whether this is gay
It's perfectly straight
nothing gay about it
Yeah he could have set his feet on him by accident
When will /lgbt/ accept trans-terrestrial?
i need to vent and get this off of my chest, been thinking about this scenario a lot
>reviewbrah comes out of the bathroom
>he is dressed with pink tutu, lacey bra
>he is extremely nervous
>i laugh a little, so does he
>we fuck
>i get small container, make him cum inside of it
>use his semen to impregnate a woman
>raise child without it ever seeing the light of day