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*Steals your NEETbux*
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>>38481018
Not for long, that heart and/or liver will give out eventually.
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>>38481044
Nah, machines will support her for the next 20 years while never going on a diet, and liberals will virtue signal her obese hard life because she's Mexican
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>>38481018
i want to stick my dick between her fat sweaty rolls
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21 yr old Ausfag
>Be me this morning
>Partied hard the night before
>Wake up with a hangover
>"I'll fix this"
>Break out my weed and smoking lamp
>Sit on my dunny throne and take a big greasy hungover deuce
>With bong in hand i rip a hotone
>"Ahh thats better"
>Got to ash the cone piece in the dunny
>Move my Johnson to the side
>And then i drop my cone piece straight down into my toilet
>Immediately the seen from trainspotting comes to mind (pic related)
>Laugh my ass off for 5 mins
>All of a sudden come to the realization i have to make a hard choice
>Flush or dive in?
Continue?
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big dirty self bump
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Fish it out, anon. It's what Renton would do.
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>>38251545
OP
>Think hard for a lil bit
>"Its my own shit right?"
>Slowly move my hand down to the toilets murky depths
>My hand slowly slides through the shit like Moses parting a brown sea
>Start to slowly fish around gagging as i go
>Suddenly i strike metal "this is it!"
>Pull the shining shit covered cone piece from the bowl
>Immediately douse my shit covered hand and the cone piece in half a bottle of iodine, soap and rinse
> Load another wipe my ass and flush
gee life is strange
Anonymous
my ears itch part 2:electric boogaloo 2017-07-09 11:30:42 Post No.38251529
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my ears itch part 2:electric boogaloo 2017-07-09 11:30:42 Post No.38251529
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my ears itch part 2:electric boogaloo
Anonymous
2017-07-09 11:30:42
Post No. 38251529
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even though i said i didn't like q-tips i used one to scratch my ear and what do you know i can't even reach the spot
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have sympathy for me everyone
>be me, semi-autistic beta, struggling with basic communication
>find girl on Omegle
>meet up and she becomes my gf at 17
>move in together at 19
>realise I no longer like her
>can't go back to parents because I don't speak to them and they disowned me
>no friends
>can't afford to get rid of girl and live alone
kinda unsure what to do here, don't know whether to ride it out with this skank and save some GBP or to just take a plunge
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>>38251485
Why did your parents disown you?
mah fwend
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>>38251523
never got on with them. Mums are real bitch and would screw me outta everything so she could walk away with 100GBP more.
Dad's an alcoholic drug taker. Maybe I disowned them as much as them me. But it isn't an option here.
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>>38251485
Honeymoon periods over and now the first time you have to work at the relationship you want to throw in the towel.
Idk maybe she's abusive and you wanting out is legit but somehow I don't think so.
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>alcohol makes me feel happy and safe
>but it also completely fucks up my memory and turns me into a retard
the eternal dilemma
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>>38251378
>doesnt even make me feel good anymore
Heroin is supposed to be ok right?
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I don't even drink that much anymore but I had an alcoholic summer a few years ago after my ex broke up with me and now the damage is done. Memory permanently fucked up.
>anon you said you would do this when we talked earlier today!
>we talked today?..
I'm also starting to not be able to recognize faces or voices, but I'm not sure if that's from booze.
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>7 inch pee pee
>Can last for 1-2 hours
>Sub
Anyone else?
29 Posts / 9 Images
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>8 inches
>wizard
>small penis humiliation fetish
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>>38480986
>4 inch wiener
>dominant sexually
>have erectile dysfunction from jerking it so much
>see literal MtF transwomen with 8 inch boners thick as a tree trunk
It isn't fair. Life isn't fair.
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>37.6 foot penis
>Literally God
>Asexual
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I-I want a qt trap to notice me where are they all at?!
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>>38251353
out getting fucked by chad.
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>>38251381
god i fucking HATE chad even taking my degen gorls (male)
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I tried to post this in text but it won't let me.
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This is how girls react in the presense of an ultra-Chad. Go 6 minutes into the video:
https://youtu.be/dHSAQLzNLAw?t=6m
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>>38251271
won't watch.
I don't want to hurt myself
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>>38251271
That's just so pathetic...
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This is a Garfield strip discussion thread
I think that the expression in Jon's eyes in the last frame also indicate that the bottle is a vehicle for his own insight into the sound of silence, the constant static that he needs to distract himself from the mundanity of his vet-oneitis wageslave life and the void that he sprints from by using detailed, esoteric pop culture and substituted and largely imaginary relationships with his pets.
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>>38251250
Garfield minus Garfield is way more relatable for me.
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Jon Arbuckle is 100% /ourguy/. I bet he posts here.
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>>38251250
I can tell from your elementary conclusion that you have not studied the classics in regards to Jim Davis's comedic and ethereal genius. Here is a snippet of the truth, but it's up to you to find the true answer. Which many specialists have concluded doesn't infact exist on this realm of understanding.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NAh9oLs67Cw&t
Growing up, Super Mario 64 was my all time favorite game. My favorite thing to do in the game was to swim really deep underwater and watch as the health went down, then watch Mario drown.
I used to do this freely but then my parents started to notice. They asked me why I kept making Mario drown and I told them I liked watching him struggle. They made me stop playing the game and I was forced to hide it so they'd think I threw it away. But whenever I was home alone, the first thing I'd do was pop this fucker in and go to a water stage. I'd make Mario drown for hours. I've been trying to find that same satisfaction ever since.
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>>38480965
Have you tried asphyxiation?
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I'd like to be in the screencap.
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psychopaths and serial killers gets great satisfaction from torturing animals at an young age.
You might want to get that checked out m8.
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The path of the righteous man is beset on all sides by the iniquities of the selfish and the tyranny of evil men, blessed is he, who in the name of charity and good will, shepherds the weak through the valley of darkness, for he is truly his brother's keeper and the finder of lost children. And I will strike down upon thee with great vengeance and furious anger those who would attempt to poison and destroy my brothers, and you will know my name is the Lord when I lay my vengeance upon thee!
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Hello! Let's have a google maps escapism thread. Post screenshots of places you'd want to visit / where you'd want to live. Comfiness is encouraged but really anything you like goes. Posts of weird or interesting sights you find are encouraged as well.
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>>38251065
some pleasant looking building i found along the coast of Hudson river
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Am I supposed to be moving my tongue every time I speak? Even when I'm not saying L's?
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how the fuck else do you pronounce words do you speak with your epiglottis
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not excessively
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Are you supposed to breathe in while saying words or out? Or not breathe at all?
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>Walk past a mirror
>Catch a glimpse of my head from the side
>filename 'self_esteem.exe' not found
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Hey, at least you don't look like and irl version of wojak
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>>38251067
Wojack actually looks better than me. His chin isn't pointy and weird, and he doesn't have an overbite.
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>acne clears up
>realise I'm still ugly af