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Archived threads in /r9k/ - ROBOT9001 - 2079. page

This is a red board which means that it's strictly for adults (Not Safe For Work content only). If you see any illegal content, please report it.

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>over half way through 2017
>he isn't bisexual
2 posts and 2 images submitted.
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>not trisexual
>in the year of our lord

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>tfw have a chronic rhinitis
>tfw 170cm manlet
>tfw have a heavy hyperhidrosis
>tfw have a M hairline

Why is life so tough?
1 posts and 1 images submitted.
No replies in the DB for this post!

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So how did reducing time browsing on this board work out for you so far?
22 posts and 5 images submitted.
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He looks better before, anon
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>>38517460
>eyes were full of life
>now look soulless
Yeah fuck becoming a normie.
>>
>>38517460
>have a job
>have my own flat
>live with my girlfriend
>going to college part time
>money to spend on what I want
>planning to get married in a couple of years
>browsed /r9k/ daily for years
You robots are sadly mistaken if you think leaving this site will fix you, you people are not mean to be like me and other normies stop trying to convince yourself otherwise and just accept your fate.

SHAKE HIS FUCKING HAND ANON
3 posts and 3 images submitted.
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>>38423077
FIRMLY, CHAMP. IT'S GOTTA BE FIRM.
>>
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>>38423077
Fuck you dad, I'm staying NEET.

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>ask oneitis to meet up with me
>*message read
>no response
7 posts and 2 images submitted.
>>
>he has read receipts on
Stop being so insecure and you might get laid some day
>>
>>38517487
I didn't know you could turn them off.
Also I ain't a virgin.
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>>38517487
What are you talking about you shut in retard? The person who receives the message can turn read receipts on or off for the person who sent the message, not the other way around.

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>be me
>be in second or third grade
>find one of my moms magazines laying around, the ones where the ladies are half naked and shit modeling bras and panties
>have a brilliant idea (or so I thought so at the time)
>think that maybe if I put this magazine under my pillow before I go to sleep, I'll dream of them
>secure the magazine under my pillow
>go to sleep
>wakeup
>didn't dream of them
>check under my pillow
>no magazine
>it's in the trash
>my brother put it in the trash

REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE3EEEEEE
1 posts and 1 images submitted.
No replies in the DB for this post!

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>tfw huge dick
>girls will literally never see it because Fleshlights feel too good

Artificial wombs when? Fleshing while stoned feels too good to give up for someone who's essentially a gay retarded manlet. The only thing I need are kids.
10 posts and 1 images submitted.
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>>38517432
>The only thing I need are kids.

Why? Kids are little shits that cost lots of money.
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>>38517432
Post pic please I want to jerk off thinking of it
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>>38517432
How big is your dick OP? Apparently i'm top 1% on dick size statistically at 7 inches.
Source: https://calcsd.bitballoon.com/

I think that's bullshit tho, all these averages and statistics are just made to make men feel better about themselves.
Porn, dick rate threads, etc lead me to believe i'm pretty average.

>After enjoying the playboy lifestyle for more than 10 years and having had sex with more than 250 women, I recently got engaged to my girlfriend of over 2 years.

Friendly reminder that if you are a white male you can't be a robot.
1 posts and 1 images submitted.
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Tfw no brum gf to go to town with
1 posts and 1 images submitted.
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Gone but still not forgotten. RIP
11 posts and 3 images submitted.
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lmao what a whiny little bitch
i bet he would have killed himself if he had phimosis as well lol
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>>38517428
At least he went out with a clean dick!
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>>38517463
Hey, at least his dick is huge.

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Why the fuck can I not stop masturbatimg to this girl
5 posts and 2 images submitted.
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>>38422922
Who is she? Maybe we can masturbate to her together ;)
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>>38423727
Some hapa slut by the looks of it
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>>38423727
>>38423750
apparently she's columbian. https://www.xvideos.com/profiles/karlasolis18

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Why are you worrying about women when you could be focusing on your training?
2 posts and 1 images submitted.
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I'm going for a week of nofap...after I fap 4 more times.

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> I am yet to find a conservative girl
> yes i have left my moms basement
> am in multiple clubs at uni, clubs for my hobbies, go to random meetups, go out alot etc
> even the ugly ones are up themselves and are sluts
> maybe i need to get out of this shithole called australia

> if there any good girls reading this, i give you this song
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0Gl2QnHNpkA
20 posts and 2 images submitted.
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>>38517421
Get the best looking one you can get and slowly turn her into what you want her to be. if you make a good emotional connection then it's not hard, just takes time.
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>>38517421
You have to join a church, dipshit.
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>>38517421
why do you want a conservative girl? they are all salty whores

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Hey anons! Need some friends? Or maybe need someone to talk to in general? Come join /Light~Criminals/ and become part of the family ^_^ yqK3aPB

"we'd love you here"
5 posts and 2 images submitted.
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My mom says i can't hang out with criminals, even "light" ones
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>>38422974
you're not a real robot if you're not a Light~Criminal, sorry.
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But I don't want friends.

I want a gf

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>shave my dick
>cut my dick with razor and it bleeds

how the fuck do i remove my dick hair so it looks fem without bleeding
13 posts and 1 images submitted.
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>>38517369
Get a brazilian wax no homo
>>
Im sorry that you never had a father to show you the very simple technique of dick shaving OP
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>>38517369
let me help you with that anon. i'll make sure your balls are nice and smooth too


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