Archived threads in /r9k/ - ROBOT9001 - 8200. page

Anonymous
2017-03-13 08:43:03 Post No.35501992
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Anonymous 2017-03-13 08:43:03 Post No. 35501992 [Report] [View this topic]

>19 year old NEET
>mum calls me out of my room
>daily mail online article on her tablet tells me to sit down
>asks me how I feel in supermarkets
>starts talking about autism diagnosis
>doesn't let me leave for an hour to watch my chinese cartoons
>mfw

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Anonymous 2017-03-13 09:00:25 Post No.35502354
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Anonymous 2017-03-13 09:00:25 Post No.35502354 [Report]

You're autistic
get disability for it

Anonymous 2017-03-13 09:08:02 Post No.35502512
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>Back in high school Councillor tells my mum that he thinks I'm Autistic
>Don't get tested because I know I am just socially retarded
>Few years later visit parents for dinner
>They have friends over
>I leave the room for a minute
>She starts telling them I'm autistic
>Suing landlord over bond claim and assault charges
>Hire my mum as my lawyer because it is free
>She tells the judge I am Autistic to try and score some sympathy points
>Visting Thailand with family
>Some degenerate roastie starts flirting with me
>Brush her off
>My mum tells her I am Autistic

Anonymous 2017-03-13 09:14:31 Post No.35502637
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Anonymous 2017-03-13 09:14:31 Post No.35502637 [Report]

>>35502354
How?

I tried once and got rejected

Plz tell me how to get neetbux

Anonymous
CALLING ALL DEGENERATES 2017-03-13 08:37:55 Post No.35501902
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CALLING ALL DEGENERATES Anonymous 2017-03-13 08:37:55 Post No. 35501902 [Report] [View this topic]

ATTENTION TO ALL DEGENERATES CURRENTLY ON /r9k/, THIS IS NOT A DRILL

I found this on /b/ https://everything-forever-store.myshopify.com/, apparently some feminist is giving away buttplugs for free if you pay for the shipping.
Is there any way to make sure it comes in a discreet packaging? I really want to get a buttplug, but don't want to receive a package with DILDO PRO printed all over it

~~also yes I'm pretty sure this is funded by george soros to promote degeneracy and bring about the downfall of western civilization by turning us gay but it's not like I care at this point~~

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Anonymous 2017-03-13 08:42:25 Post No.35501979
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Anonymous 2017-03-13 08:42:25 Post No.35501979 [Report]

>>35501902
In general, those types of things already have discreet packaging. It will probably just be in a box with your address.

Anonymous 2017-03-13 08:44:12 Post No.35502026
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Anonymous 2017-03-13 08:44:12 Post No.35502026 [Report]

>>35501979
I'm not sure I trust a feminist with this though.
What if it's in a rainbow box with the words "embrace who you really are :^)" written on it, to spread acceptance or something

Anonymous 2017-03-13 08:44:50 Post No.35502039
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Anonymous 2017-03-13 08:44:50 Post No.35502039 [Report]

>>35501902
>being so insecure about your sexuality that you project your denial about yourself outwards onto some global conspiracy

Not FBI
Murder Thread :^) 2017-03-13 08:37:27 Post No.35501895
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Murder Thread :^) Not FBI 2017-03-13 08:37:27 Post No. 35501895 [Report] [View this topic]

Well robots, how would you go about killing people theoretically
Spree killing, mass murder, and serial killing all welcome

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Zapatero el judío sefardí 2017-03-13 08:39:08 Post No.35501930
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Zapatero el judío sefardí 2017-03-13 08:39:08 Post No.35501930 [Report]

>>35501895
4 some shity fags i would do some torture things

Anonymous 2017-03-13 08:45:27 Post No.35502053
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Anonymous 2017-03-13 08:45:27 Post No.35502053 [Report]

>>35501895
I would spend about a month beforehand researching forensic science to find out exactly what I can do to avoid getting caught first. Then I would move to a city with lots of people, and find lots of good escape routes if needed. I would get a few silencers and guns, along with other killing tools, like common knives and stuff. Also I would become fit just in case. After preparation I would find hunt down families on welfare and murder them in their sleep to help improve the city. I would keep going in that city until it seems like the police could be closing in on my area for suspects, and then I would move to another city with money I've saved up.

Anonymous
Questioning your well being guys 2017-03-13 08:37:08 Post No.35501886
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Questioning your well being guys Anonymous 2017-03-13 08:37:08 Post No. 35501886 [Report] [View this topic]

Is there really a majority of robots here? Probably some of you guys are but that's not the majority, right?

What you think the average /r9k/ browser looks like? Do we know what's the percentage of girls vs dudes here? Are they actually robots living in their mom's basement covered in filth? I'm curious.

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AnonRepilled 2017-03-13 08:42:08 Post No.35501976
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AnonRepilled 2017-03-13 08:42:08 Post No.35501976 [Report]

>>35501886
1- kek.exe @pic
2- >What you think the average /r9k/ browser looks like?
like pic related
3- > Do we know what's the percentage of girls vs dudes here?
fembots doesnt exist

Anonymous 2017-03-13 09:04:50 Post No.35502452
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Anonymous 2017-03-13 09:04:50 Post No.35502452 [Report]

>>35501886
who even came up with this pic

Anonymous
2017-03-13 08:35:19 Post No.35501849
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Anonymous 2017-03-13 08:35:19 Post No. 35501849 [Report] [View this topic]

So if i cant quite wrap a dollar bill around my cock, that means i'm over 6 inch girth... that's pretty fat, right?

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Anonymous 2017-03-13 08:38:14 Post No.35501912
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Anonymous 2017-03-13 08:38:14 Post No.35501912 [Report]

Also, i'm like 7.8x6 inches
Share your dimensions

Anonymous 2017-03-13 08:40:00 Post No.35501945
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Anonymous 2017-03-13 08:40:00 Post No.35501945 [Report]

>>35501912
6.1x4

>>35501849
yea that's pretty fat.

Anonymous 2017-03-13 08:47:02 Post No.35502086
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Anonymous 2017-03-13 08:47:02 Post No.35502086 [Report]

>>35501945
Good to hear. You guys think girls will be impressed or comment that it's big?
Not really sure how common that girth is
Never had sex yet

Anonymous
2017-03-13 08:31:58 Post No.35501780
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Anonymous 2017-03-13 08:31:58 Post No. 35501780 [Report] [View this topic]

>Haven't had sex in nearly three weeks
This is horrible bros. I hate being a robot

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Anonymous 2017-03-13 08:34:30 Post No.35501838
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Anonymous 2017-03-13 08:34:30 Post No.35501838 [Report]

nigga i ain't had an impure thought in three weeks

you are like a little baby flesh slave

Anonymous 2017-03-13 08:35:30 Post No.35501853
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Anonymous 2017-03-13 08:35:30 Post No.35501853 [Report]

>>35501780
HELP
I can't make threads, only post replies. Anyone else have this problem? How do I fix this curse?

Anonymous 2017-03-13 08:38:01 Post No.35501906
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>>35501853
Saw you post this yesterday in another thread

Anonymous
2017-03-13 08:31:28 Post No.35501763
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Anonymous 2017-03-13 08:31:28 Post No. 35501763 [Report] [View this topic]

>post yfw the orgasm wasn't as good as you thought it would be

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Anonymous 2017-03-13 08:32:42 Post No.35501793
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in many ways I see masturbation as maintenance
namely, get my rocks off so I can stop thinking about sex for a few hours
as a result my orgasms tend to be underwhelming

Anonymous 2017-03-13 08:34:05 Post No.35501832
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>tfw the orgasm hurts

Anonymous 2017-03-13 08:34:10 Post No.35501834
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Anonymous 2017-03-13 08:34:10 Post No.35501834 [Report]

A while ago in a thread on /pol/, some Italian guy claiming to be a doctor or medical student or something said it was a scientific fact that all orgasms feel exactly the same.

That is such absolute bullshit.

Anonymous
2017-03-13 08:26:22 Post No.35501662
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Anonymous 2017-03-13 08:26:22 Post No. 35501662 [Report] [View this topic]

>super high sex drive
>small penis so I'll never fully able to satisfy it

What did God mean by this?

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Anonymous 2017-03-13 08:27:56 Post No.35501697
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Anonymous 2017-03-13 08:27:56 Post No.35501697 [Report]

>>35501662
>what did "God" mean by this
What did he mean by this?

Anonymous 2017-03-13 08:33:57 Post No.35501828
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Anonymous 2017-03-13 08:33:57 Post No.35501828 [Report]

>>35501697
god, nature, whatever

Anonymous
2017-03-13 08:23:17 Post No.35501600
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Anonymous 2017-03-13 08:23:17 Post No. 35501600 [Report] [View this topic]

>tfw no prosumer bf

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Anonymous 2017-03-13 08:24:20 Post No.35501615
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Anonymous 2017-03-13 08:24:20 Post No.35501615 [Report]

It's been a while since I've seen you anon, how are you doing?

Anonymous 2017-03-13 08:29:03 Post No.35501722
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Anonymous 2017-03-13 08:29:03 Post No.35501722 [Report]

>>35501615
Doing alright, today's been good so far.

Anonymous 2017-03-13 08:34:55 Post No.35501844
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>>35501600
Thanks, Doc.

I produce and consume media.

Anonymous
2017-03-13 08:22:47 Post No.35501590
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Anonymous 2017-03-13 08:22:47 Post No. 35501590 [Report] [View this topic]

Would you get hooked on heroin if it meant you'd get a qt drugg gf like Natalie?

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Anonymous 2017-03-13 08:24:06 Post No.35501613
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Anonymous 2017-03-13 08:24:06 Post No.35501613 [Report]

no you fucking fag. there's nothing romantic about getting hooked on drugs. go out and meet some druggies and tell me you want to be around them.

Anonymous 2017-03-13 08:24:42 Post No.35501625
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Anonymous 2017-03-13 08:24:42 Post No.35501625 [Report]

Nah. Not worth it. I'm just going to keep trying.

Anonymous 2017-03-13 08:26:38 Post No.35501670
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>>35501590
>would you kill yourself to get a druggy roastie

the answer is no

Anonymous
2017-03-13 08:19:12 Post No.35501510
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Anonymous 2017-03-13 08:19:12 Post No. 35501510 [Report] [View this topic]

>tfw found some solace in the words of Jesus

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Anonymous 2017-03-13 08:20:19 Post No.35501535
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Anonymous 2017-03-13 08:20:19 Post No.35501535 [Report]

>>35501510
but sissel ~~animals don't have souls~~

Anonymous 2017-03-13 08:20:24 Post No.35501538
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>>35501510
Lucky
Oregnal

Anonymous 2017-03-13 08:20:58 Post No.35501550
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Anonymous 2017-03-13 08:20:58 Post No.35501550 [Report]

>>35501535
but anon ~~i'm not an animal~~

/cozy/ loner room
2017-03-13 08:18:24 Post No.35501491
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/cozy/ loner room 2017-03-13 08:18:24 Post No. 35501491 [Report] [View this topic]

Room's up n running, gonna stream Of Mice and Men at 1:30pm Pacific time, join for quality memes

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Anonymous 2017-03-13 08:19:16 Post No.35501512
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Anonymous 2017-03-13 08:19:16 Post No.35501512 [Report]

>>35501491
lol forgot to link
https://www.rabb.it/r9kCozyRabbitCast
https://www.rabb.it/r9kCozyRabbitCast
https://www.rabb.it/r9kCozyRabbitCast

Anonymous 2017-03-13 08:22:16 Post No.35501578
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Anonymous 2017-03-13 08:22:16 Post No.35501578 [Report]

>>35501491
bump for comfy of mice and men pic

Anonymous
2017-03-13 08:18:15 Post No.35501489
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Anonymous 2017-03-13 08:18:15 Post No. 35501489 [Report] [View this topic]

>have a collection of piss bottles
>never clean my room, there are broken plates and months old food scraps
>my toilet has a layer of shit crust from never being cleaned
>vomit in my shower and sink
>started vomiting into the kitchen sink where my family prepare meals
This isnt me, its a family member. How do I go about getting them help? They faked being fine at the pschiatrists but theyre getting worse everyday, food goes missing in the night and there is vomit in more & more places. It was funny when I memed about it but now its actually fucking happening

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Anonymous 2017-03-13 08:19:52 Post No.35501524
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Anonymous 2017-03-13 08:19:52 Post No.35501524 [Report]