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Archived threads in /r9k/ - ROBOT9001 - 3699. page

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Fuck traps
Fuck roasties
2D is where it's at
11 posts and 7 images submitted.
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2D is superior to 3DPD in every way.

>2D in bikinis
My weakness.
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bump for truth
3D women are NOT important

>Yum, Anon! This is some fine ass goat semen you got here. But how did you get it? My grandpa used to own farms for roughly half a century, and he describes goats as some of the most stubborn fucks he's ever worked with.
1 posts and 1 images submitted.
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during this point in my life i had a girlfriend, even while being so downright ugly
9 posts and 3 images submitted.
bone structure > skin quality
You just had/have acne, and that doesn't mean you're ugly

Two rules.
Never hit on girls. The little-known first rule of hitting on girls. This doesn't mean don't approach them or chat them up. Approach girls constantly and openly (see below). But never do anything that triggers that little alarm in her mind, "he's hitting on me." If that alarm goes off before she's decided about you, you're done. Don't rehearse lines. Don't say, "I like you". Don't corner them in an awkward situation, don't try to maneuver them into meeting again, don't plan an elaborate first date, don't back them into some first kiss. Don't do that. Do be magnanimous and open.
Be magnanimous. Judge your own behaviours by this word. George Clooney, Michael Caine, or Aaron Eckart in the first scene of "Thank you for Smoking" are the gold standard. Approach girls constantly and openly. Talk to them. Introduce yourself. Smile. Be nice. Laugh easily and laugh often. Then give them space. Move on to someone new. Approach men, too. Interact with people like their private parts don't matter. People are inherently interesting - talk to them for your amusement. Joke with the cashier girl. Talk to your postman about the weather. Ask the person waiting next to you at the bar whether to get Bud or the local thing. Some people will blow you off. Fine. Laugh. They're not on your level. Sometimes you'll embarass yourself. Fine. You're practicing. Laugh it off and say hello to another stranger. You're magnanimous.
That's the practical stuff. But honestly, man, don't worry about girls. Just do what you need to do to be proud of yourself. Go for a jog, wear clothes that fit, and get excited about a hobby. Girls don't matter, but you matter. Once you're happy with yourself, someone will fall in love with you. I promise.

Lifted straight off of reddit. Thoughts?
5 posts and 2 images submitted.
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>People are inherently interesting

Well now we know OP's full of shit
Do you want practice socializing? Talk to salesman and pretend to be interested in buying something. Used car salesmen are the best.

Don't listen to PUA pep talk, especially on reddit. It's sad how they turn words like 'magnanimous' into jargon.

Finally, focus on earning money and maintaining good health. If you have money, you can always fuck a hooker, but if your only skill in life is picking up girls, you're going to be miserable in the end.
This is a lot easier when youre drunk

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>go to sleep wanting to kill myself
>dream about meeting SUPER C U T E girl
>hang out with her and talk until i wake up
>wake up wanting to live my life
This is it boys. I'll see you in Normieville.
10 posts and 3 images submitted.
>Go to sleep
>Wake up

Fuck not again
I had something similar happen to me.
> go to bed happy and carefree
> dream about accidentally committing vehicular manslaughter
> go to jail for 20 years
> wake up afraid to ever drive again
Fuck dreams man
I recently dreamed that I was in a transgender bathtub and Tana Mongeau was in the tub with me giving me a hand job and I was talking to IDubbbz but he didn't see her for some reason. It was really weird because I hadn't seen any Tana/IDubbbz shit since 4 months ago.

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>bored and curious
>look up old acquaintance online
>find out he's a sex offender doing time

I'm much more grateful now for my situation than I was a few minutes ago. Holy shit.
1 posts and 1 images submitted.
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>start lucid dreaming
>fucking oneitis in lucid dream on a cloud
>some random old guy kept flying around wanting to fuck me
>keep telling him to fuck off
>He comes back with more old people
>they take my oneitis and gang bang her
>get mad and wake up

Anyone have success with this shit?
14 posts and 6 images submitted.
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>cucked in his own dreams
How do you live man
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it's not a lucid dream then anon, you are in controll fully of the dream

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>be dreaming
>be wracked by guilt about something wrong that you did
>wake up
>still feel guilty
>but then remember that you didn't actually do it
1 posts and 1 images submitted.
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>stop smoking weed every day
>life begins to improve

who woulda thunk
2 posts and 1 images submitted.
>quit smoking weed every day

>still end up binge eating thousands of calories


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Who here /costco pizza/
8 posts and 3 images submitted.
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I order from the local dominoes because they have a delivery girl.
It's pretty good but not $10 good desu

When i do get it i like to fold the slice on top of itself and put parmesan in the middle
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that would be enough for me to NOT want to order from there.
when ordering pizza i usually pay online with my paypal and add a message to leave the pizza at the door.
i also put a physical note on the door also, in case they didn't see the message.

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Mom, STOP calling me handsome. I am not.
10 posts and 2 images submitted.
at this point i just feel like she's mocking me
She's saying it to convince herself more than you. She hasn't excepted you won't bring her children yet
But you are handsome anon

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>Works at a gentleman's club but doesn't say it's a strip club
4 posts and 1 images submitted.
Everybody, and I mean ABSOLUTELY everybody, knows it's just a fancy word for strip club

One of my FB friends had it on her profile and I asked if she used to be a stripper. She said no and wondered why I asked
>trusting a woman to admit that she's a former totallynotawhore

Realest Rappers?
1 posts and 1 images submitted.
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Am I the only one that see artists and other "popular" people on social media as perfect? Like this artist for an example they have literal thousands of followers and I believe in my mind their personal life is perfect and it pisses me off because they are about to make online friends that pretty much helped them get where they are today. It really pisses me off. I'm ready to FIGHT FIGHT FIGHT.
31 posts and 5 images submitted.
ayo fool why you hate them for? just because they have all that doesn't mean you can get it too
I mean what has this person done to you to make them hate them? Did they say your drawings were shit? C'mon man. Nowadays people hate other people for no reason at all other than because they're "popular".
For some people high school and its mentality never end. Usually the people posting this are also in, or barely out of high school, which makes it understandable to some degree.

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>i overdosed
>should've known your love was a game

>now I can't getcha outta muh brain
>Ooh it's such a shame

>we don't talk anymore
>we don't we don't we don't
>what was all of it for?
1 posts and 1 images submitted.
No replies in the DB for this post!

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