Archived threads in /r9k/ - ROBOT9001 - 3835. page

File: tumblr_o6q1wa5FJU1r8lurwo5_r1_1280.png (210KB, 1200x900px) Image search: [Google]

210KB, 1200x900px

>mfw wanna be a bull, but have a gf

File: StinkyStan.png (139KB, 2784x2696px) Image search: [Google]

139KB, 2784x2696px

Stinky Stan was here...

File: 6f5.jpg (15KB, 427x365px) Image search: [Google]

15KB, 427x365px

How do I cure someone elses Oneitis?
The same dude has been contacting me daily for about 1.5 years now (He has my phone number) and I have never responded. He did it literally (LITERALLY) daily for a whole fucking year, and I never responded.
The last half year it has slowed down, but it is still there.
It is so bad that I can no longer make any online profile with my real name, without him finding it and contacting it somehow. He would constantly make new accounts with new names and re-add me or try to contact me.
I even changed my online alias and made new accounts because of him.

Story is basically this
>Chat online for 3 months
>We live somewhat close
>Go over to his house just to hang
>We just play board games and watch TV in his bed
>Nothing lewd just laying together
>After spending time with him in real life I find him mentally unstable (Mostly anger and him taking pride in hurting people who he dislikes)
>Tell him it won't work out on a text when I'm on my way home
Ever since then it has been literal hell.
Call me a coward for not saying it to his face, but I was legit scared he would hurt me.

He also said he had mild autism (When we finally met irl).

File: richard-farley-56af230e3df78cf772c0cff2.jpg (53KB, 735x735px) Image search: [Google]

53KB, 735x735px

>desuarchive is still down

How am I supposed to e-stalk anons now?

File: image.jpg (59KB, 482x427px) Image search: [Google]

59KB, 482x427px

I really need to find a way to leave this website forever...

File: 472.jpg (14KB, 320x319px) Image search: [Google]

14KB, 320x319px

>onto my second pissbottle of the night

File: ree.png (327KB, 604x601px) Image search: [Google]

327KB, 604x601px

>be me
>senior year of high school
>parents give me $700
>buy a Samsung S6 to replace my HTC Desire 816
>in class one day
>bored as fuck
>start drawing on notebook cover
>decide to draw pepe
>suddenly have this brilliant idea
> get home, factory reset my HTC so there's no way the phone could ever be traced back to me
>Get on computer and download fucking normal fags video (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Mq-Y93N40o4) [Embed]
>use Hitfilm 4 Express to add a 20 minute long blank screen and loop the "FUCKING NORMAL FAGS GET THE FUCK OFF MY BOARD"
>export the video onto youtube and put it as private
>fast foward to 4th period (the most boring class of the day)
>play the video on HTC
> hide HTC in bookshelf
>fast foward 20 minutes
>video plays
>everybody just laughs but teacher is not amused
>teacher has anger issues
>tries to get everybody to calm down quietly
>after that he just yells "SHUT UP"
>goes to the bookshelf
>takes phone, opens the window and throws it out (the class was on the 2nd floor)
>good night sweet prince
>phone almost hits a kid
>kids start talking about what happened
>everyone is wondering who's phone it was
>to this day my best friend is the only one who knows it was my phone

File: checkum.png (489KB, 1080x1920px) Image search: [Google]

489KB, 1080x1920px

YOU HEARD THE DOD, YOU NEET BEDSHITTERS. YOU'RE ALL GONNA ACT LIKE CHADS BY GOD.

File: thot patrol.jpg (59KB, 1080x597px) Image search: [Google]

59KB, 1080x597px

>it's 3:13 AM
>been trying to sleep for 2 hours
>cannot fall asleep at all, tried turning off electronics and turning all lights off so my room is pitch black and I still can't sleep
>toss and turn a fuckton
>brain will not shut the fuck up
>this has been going on for a week
I fucking hate my brain

File: 159357419532.gif (397KB, 250x188px) Image search: [Google]

397KB, 250x188px

I want to be a robot. Not the R9K robot, but a machine. Ever since I was a kid I always wanted the benefits of a machine. You wouldn't have to feel sadness, you wouldn't have to feel anxious, you wouldn't feel nervousness, you could choose your emotions, and you wouldn't have any disgusting internal organs (heart, brain, stomach etc). You wouldn't have to do any disgusting routine things like humans. Like taking a shit, or pissing. I've been wondering for a long time if there is a second life in a different universe where everything is better in every way, but the only thing stopping me is that I don't know for sure what's in the afterlife. Whether one of the religions is true, or if it's something not even heard of. I don't know guys.

File: IMG_2119.jpg (66KB, 850x400px) Image search: [Google]

66KB, 850x400px

>on r9k
>AND the toilet
Is this what anons mean by shitposting?

File: disgusted-face.jpg (41KB, 342x456px) Image search: [Google]

41KB, 342x456px

other than the jokes this board is pretty sad i genuinely get more suicidal everytime i look through

like seriously get out instead of complaining on this board all day. anyone that's told you this you guys call a normie, no one's gonna help you but yourself

>but desu pretty glad non of you gonna be able to reproduce

File: tumblr_oqfuwmdsU71sg5eb3o1_1280[1].jpg (373KB, 1280x1920px) Image search: [Google]

373KB, 1280x1920px

>tfw no fat beIly gf to cuddIe with

File: 15202580_1768971883355281_5354524793995367170_n.jpg (16KB, 417x353px) Image search: [Google]

16KB, 417x353px

He tried to log into my account. i only have his IP.
78.160.250.22
that asshole better not get near my schmeckles.

File: P6mIw9N.jpg (65KB, 500x667px) Image search: [Google]

65KB, 500x667px

I dunno, everyone keeps telling me spaghetti and ketchup is disgusting. I dunno, the tart of the vinegar causes Lucifer himself to seize and torture your tongue in the deepest depths of hell only for you to be dragged back by the fructose which dances around you in a ritual like manner similar to the cults of old with the spices being the blood and sacrifice to ignite the ritual and to bring you back to your sense and into this world. Once you are back, the flavorless spaghetti dilutes the previous drug of the ketchup so that it does not overwhelm your sense and stabilizes you in the real world just long enough for you to see that the ketchup is everywhere. You then look to the right and see a building of ketchup stretching and grasping towards the sky only to fall ketchup short of it. You notice. Ketchup as the dog. Ketchup as the people whom collar and chain the ketchup dogs. Ketchup as the sun that looks down on all. Ketchup as the clouds. Ketchup as the infrastructure that hold this society together. You then run away, looking for an escape but there is none. Ketchup is all. Ketchup sees all. There is only one god: Ketchup. You see ketchup people everywhere, you run shoving them aside, their bodies turning into mist with each shove. You cry and cry and cry. You are a murderer. Your victims: ketchup. You cry and suddenly you don't care anymore. You run again, destroying all ketchup in your wake. It's dark now and noketchup is left standing. The moon, ketchup, sees all, It intensely stares at you through the clouds of ketchup. Your guilt crushes you. You move left but then right then left again and now ketchup. You fall into a hole. The ketchup moon follows. Its gaze reaches into the hole and illuminates ketchup for you to see. You stare and stare and then, staring back at you, Spaghetti.