Archived threads in /news/ - Current News - 309. page

Good gets rid of the degenerates

>>38188
That's not how opiod addictions work. There are good people getting hooked on these extremely powerful drugs.

>>38207
without mentioning the fact that you can get addicted to opioids if you have a bad accident and they give you morphine

>>38515
An unidentified employee at the Panamanian law firm Mossack Fonseca leaked the final installment of more than 11 million company documents to a German newspaper, exposing the use of offshore bank accounts and shell companies by associates of heads of state in Argentina, China, England, Iceland, Russia, and Saudi Arabia.[1] The prime minister of Iceland resigned following protests in Reykjavik, where 10,000 people banged drums, blew whistles, and waved bananas.[2] British prime minister David Cameron admitted he had previously owned a stake in his father’s Bahamas-based trust fund, which he did not pay taxes on.[3] The president of the Chilean branch of Transparency International, an organization that monitors corruption, resigned after being linked to five offshore companies; and China blocked Internet searches of the word Panama.[4][5] “Any publicity,” said a bookstore owner in Panama City, “is good.”[6] In Macedonia fighting broke out between migrants attempting to climb a border fence and police officers, who deployed tear gas, stun grenades, and water cannons.[7] One hundred twenty migrants were deported from Greek islands to Turkey, and 149 migrants entered Greece from Turkey.[8] It was reported that 1,000 Afghan and Syrian migrants rioted for six hours at a detention camp on Chios, where only one asylum service official was employed to process refugee applications.[9][10] In Leicestershire, England, a seven-year-old Afghan boy trapped in a locked truck with 14 other migrants sent a text message to a volunteer aid worker who had given him a cell phone in Calais. “I ned halp,” he texted. “Darivar no stap car no oksijan.”[1

>>38517 forgot quotes, sry ::>_<::
>Federal prosecutors revealed that former Speaker of the House Dennis Hastert had sexually abused four boys when he was a high-school wrestling coach in the 1960s and 70s and had paid one of his victims $1.7 million in hush money.[12] Belgian authorities arrested Mohamed Abrini, who is suspected of being one of the three bombers who carried out the Brussels airport attacks in March.[13] In Damascus, Islamic State militants abducted more than 300 cement-factory workers.[14] North Korea announced it had designed an engine for a ballistic missile capable of reaching the United States. [15] Facebook removed pages that were selling handguns, rifles, submachine guns, anti-tank weapons, rocket launchers, heavy machine guns, portable anti-aircraft systems, and grenade launchers.[16] Explosions during a fireworks show at a religious festival in India killed 106 people.[17] A NASA study found changes in the Earth’s wobble, caused in part by Greenland’s annual loss of 272 trillion kilograms of ice. “There is nothing to worry about,” said a space researcher at the University of Texas. “It is just another interesting effect of climate change.”

>>38520
>Elementary school students in England launched a stuffed toy dog into space using helium balloons, and two high-school students in Auckland were hospitalized with neck wounds incurred during their opening-night performance of Sweeney Todd. [19][20] The Tokyo Fire Department announced that 104 people had been hospitalized for acute alcohol intoxication during this season’s cherry-blossom viewing parties.[21] Sweden’s tourism agency installed a phone line for anyone in the world to call “a random Swede,” and suggested discussing the northern lights, darkness, meatballs, and suicide rates. [22] In California, two men began stabbing one another in the head and neck after one defecated on the other’s lawn.[23] A Bronx man who had hired an Uber to travel from Philadelphia to Herkimer, New York, took over driving so that the driver could nap, led police on a highway chase, and crashed into a guardrail.[24] In Germany, the town of Tegernsee stripped Adolf Hitler of his “honorary citizenship”; a fight broke out in the buffet line at a Mercedes shareholder meeting when a man took more than the two sausages he was allotted; and 90 people were evacuated from a casino after a vibrating penis ring in a men’s restroom trash can made ticking and humming noises.[25][26][27] California researchers found that touching the genitals and buttocks of robots arouses humans.[28] In Guangzhou, a restaurant terminated its robot service staff for incompetence.

>The Syrian Army recaptured the ancient city of Palmyra, which had been occupied by the Islamic State for ten months.[1] Military officials reported discovering that the group had raided tombs, planted thousands of explosives throughout the city, decapitated 2,000-year-old statues, and buried in a mass grave at least 42 people, some of whom had been decapitated.[2][3][4] An Islamic State–affiliated group in Saudi Arabia claimed responsibility for the bombing of a police station in al-Dalam, where one person was killed.[5][6] An Amtrak train traveling from New York City to Savannah, Georgia, hit a backhoe parked on the tracks outside Philadelphia, killing two people; and a train in Thailand hit a double-decker tourist bus, killing three people.[7][8] In England, 18 people were injured when two trains collided at a railway station.[9] A nurse in Tuscany was accused of murdering 13 of her patients, and a nurse in New York lost her license after taking a photo of an unconscious man’s penis on her phone and sending it to her coworkers.[10][11] Officials in the U.S. Department of Justice announced that they had figured out how to bypass the security features on an iPhone belonging to one of the suspects in the 2015 shooting at the Inland Regional Center in San Bernardino and agreed to unlock another iPhone for police in Arkansas.[12][13] The Great Barrier Reef was reported to be in the midst of the worst coral bleaching in its history, the Pavlof Volcano in Alaska erupted unexpectedly, and a sinkhole in a pond in China swallowed 25 tons of fish.[14][15][16]

>>38277
>In Georgia, video footage surfaced of a 32-year-old man who packed his lawn mower with tannerite, a powder that explodes when struck by a high-velocity bullet, and then began shooting it with his semi-automatic rifle. “I blew my leg off,” he said.[17] A 67-year-old turkey hunter in Alabama fatally shot himself when he fell into a ravine and his gun discharged into his upper body, and a 16-year-old boy in Florida fired a gun at his bedroom wall and accidentally shot his sister, who was in the next room.[18][19] GunTV, the first home-shopping network for guns, launched with the slogan “Live Shopping. Fully Loaded.”[20] Lawmakers in California and New York announced they would raise their states’ minimum wages to $15 per hour, and an assemblywoman in New Jersey proposed a law that would impose jail sentences of up to 15 days on pedestrians caught sending text messages while walking.[21][22] A 72-year-old man was arrested on a plane in Hawaii for trying to bite and head-butt fellow passengers after being told he wasn’t allowed to do yoga, and a 59-year-old man on an EgyptAir flight traveling from Alexandria to Cairo claimed to be wearing an explosive vest and forced the crew to redirect the plane to Cyprus, where his ex-wife lives. “Always there is,” said the president of Cyprus, “a woman.”[23][24]

>>38278
>Fishermen in Portugal rescued a 65-year-old British tourist from the Atlantic Ocean while she was attempting to swim to a cruise ship, which she thought her husband was aboard. “Susan,” said the head of the port authority, “got a little lost.”[25] A 69-year-old Florida man was arrested for driving six miles with his wife on the roof of his Toyota, claiming that he did not know she was up there and did not hear her screaming.[26] Shouting was banned on a rollercoaster in England, and a 100-year-old woman was evicted from her Palm Springs apartment because of noise complaints. “I’ve evicted people,” said the eviction specialist hired by the landlord, “off their death beds.”[27][28] In the Indian state of Maharashtra, a law was passed requiring candidates in municipal elections to provide evidence that they have working toilets.[29] A teenager in Ohio pleaded guilty to touring a high school while posing as a state senator.[30] Saudi Arabia’s Committee for the Promotion of Virtue and the Prevention of Vice arrested a doctor for flying a rainbow flag, and doctors in Brazil prevented a man from losing his hand after an accident by sewing it into his abdomen. “It’s a really weird feeling,” he said, “to wiggle my fingers.”[31][32]

Op is a faggot

jfc those royal torpedo titties

Fuck the bitch

>reality check
http://www.bbc.com/news/live/uk-politics-eu-referendum-35603388
These reality checks have potential if some anons get in on it.

>>38144
I'm not from UK or Europe but... Wouldn't it be easier to believe this if it didn't come from a government run publication, regardless of the truth of either? The Government(UK), as far as I know, has/should have a significant interest in keeping good relations with the EU for trade and such.

And what's the point of leaving anyway? Muh Freedumbs?

>>38201
I think it's more that people want self autonomy. EG they don't want to be forced to take in migrants, forced to meet some austerity quota, force to do this, that, and some of those.

Not in the EU, so I'm not 100% on that.

I wonder if he actually was from Syria or was one of those people from North Africa.
Either way, he was pretty stupid.

>>38240
I doubt anyone is really surprised by this, they are a plague that brings nothing but anguish.

>>38240
why do i get the feeling this wont get any coverage

man this is /news/ we don't give a fuck about white dude's and their violent crime. this is a place for hating niggers, spics, and women. back to plebbit with this shit. if you can make this about how she fucked up then you might have something.

http://q13fox.com/2016/04/11/police-say-human-remains-found-in-seattle-thought-to-be-those-of-missing-renton-mom-of-3-suspect-arrested/

>>38394
Fuck off back to /pol/, dickmuncher.

>>38405
Moron

>>38394
Terrible tumblrina false flag.

>>38217
other coverage:

>Goldman Sachs pays $5 billion to settle allegations it sold shoddy mortgages
https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/business/wp/2016/04/11/goldman-sachs-pays-5-billion-to-settle-allegations-it-sold-shoddy-mortgages-prior-to-financial-crisis/

>Goldman Sachs to pay $5 billion in U.S. Justice Dept mortgage bond pact
http://www.reuters.com/article/us-goldman-sachs-mbs-settlement-idUSKCN0X81TI

>Goldman Sachs Resolves U.S. Mortgage Probe for $5.1 Billion
http://www.bloomberg.com/news/articles/2016-04-11/goldman-to-pay-5-1-billion-to-settle-u-s-mortgage-bond-probe

>Goldman Sachs Will Pay $5 Billion For Misleading Investors On Mortgage Assets
http://www.npr.org/sections/thetwo-way/2016/04/11/473817622/goldman-sachs-will-pay-5-billion-for-misleading-investors-on-mortgage-assets

The only thing "punishing" corporations accomplishes is filling the state's coffers anyway. People are the ones who do crimes, and there's no incentive for them to stop if they don't get punished.

>>38217
hmmm

>>38134
It might be Elton John's husband, according to
http://www.2oceansvibe.com/2016/04/08/apparently-this-is-the-celebrity-in-that-threesome-scandal/
Fuck Britain though

>>38134
I don't know

>>Same here, Gotta be a Scottish pal or American who take a picture of the paper or something!

related:

http://www.wsj.com/articles/u-k-s-daily-mail-explores-bid-for-yahoo-backed-by-private-equity-1460324999

>The U.K.’s Daily Mail has emerged as a suitor for Yahoo Inc. ’s assets, joining a wide group of interested companies that includes telecom giant Verizon Communications Inc. as an April 18 deadline for preliminary offers nears, according to people familiar with the matter.

>The parent company of the Daily Mail, the British newspaper and global tabloid website, is in talks with several private-equity firms to launch a bid for Yahoo, the people said. Daily Mail & General Trust PLC, whose main interest is Yahoo’s news and media properties, is just one of some 40 players that have expressed interest in the Web portal.

>Yahoo has held meetings with Verizon, InterActiveCorp and CBS Corp. , one of the people said. The Mail hasn’t yet met with Yahoo executives. Verizon, which owns AOL and is looking to beef up its digital media and advertising businesses further, is considered a front-runner for Yahoo, according to many executives and analysts following the sale process.

>A possible bid by Daily Mail could take one of two forms, the people familiar with the matter said. In one scenario, a private-equity partner would aim to acquire the entirety of Yahoo’s U.S. operation, with the Mail taking over the news and media properties.

>Those assets include verticals such as Yahoo Finance and Yahoo Sports plus Yahoo News and a video operation whose big star is Katie Couric. Yahoo has been retrenching in those businesses. In February the company closed seven digital magazines including sites dedicated to food, parenting and health.

>In the other scenario, the private-equity firm would acquire Yahoo and merge its media and news properties into a new company that would include the Mail’s Web properties, DailyMail.com and Elite Daily, the people said. The Mail would run that business and would get a larger equity stake than under the first scenario.
...

>>38083
>you live to see Yahoo! get sold for peanuts to a fucking gossip mag
Did Yahoo get here because of its feminist workforce?

>>38110
probably
now that Yahoo owns tumblr i wonder what would happen if the dailymail purchased them

>>38137
> Cost is $2.01
> Pays $2.00
> Still works

>>38141
Its in Canada, pennies were phased out so all purchases round to the nearest nickel.

>>38166

Well that must drive CPA's cray cray bananas

>>38120
>Saturday's shocking revelations follow another tragic month -- 28 Attawapiskat residents attempted suicide in March, more than 100 since September of last year.
>One person has successfully taken their life since September.
Why do these snowniggers suck so badly at killing themselves?
They don't really sound that suicidal, t.b.h.

>>38129
Especially considering most attempts are at around 10% (https://www.hsph.harvard.edu/means-matter/means-matter/case-fatality/)

although a different source claims it's much lower than that: http://lostallhope.com/suicide-statistics

>>38120
Natives kill themslves all the fucking time. I had plenty of contact with Davis Inlet people when I was in Labrador. They all just drink and sniff gas to the point where they are brain damaged retards and then cant cope and kill themeslves when the goverment tries to help by getting them off that shit thats killing them.

I had this one retarded native kid when I was in school. He loved sniffing gas so much he started rubbing it on his gums like fucking cocaine, and ended up losing all his teeth. Ended up with the cheapest shittiest looking metal teeth you ever saw costing the government over 40k. He ended up going to college where he overdosed on pills.

>>38070
I like Paul Ryan better than everyone else in the race, but he's not running. His speaking tours are aimed at holding the party's majorities in Congress.

It's a prudent move considering the damage Trump is threatening. For the sake of the parties and the country the executive branch needs to be nerfed.

>>38070
>And his office continued to beat back the not-exactly-library-voice whisper campaign favoring a coup at the Republican convention in July that would elevate Mr. Ryan to the top of the ticket.

He ain't gunning for the 2016 election, but he is setting the groundwork for his later career and possibly revitalizing the GOP.

Ryan isn't stupid, he's already repeatedly declined to run for the 2016 election because he doesn't want to get caught in that train-wreck. But you better believe he'll make sure to be standing in stark contrast of this circus by 2020.

>>38070
Ryan won't run. He isn't stupid, and know it's not his time. He can't unite the party as it is and has very few brag-worthy accomplishments to his name. He will probably run later in his life though.

Make no mistake, there is no white knight establishment candidate coming to the rescue for 2016. Kasich won't get shit, and if he does the party will revolt. It's Ted v Trump this July.

Ahh the NYpost, Rupert Murdoch's #2 best paper after TheSun for highlighting the most outrageous things going on in the world. I'm not whining, I just haven't seen them on /news/ in a while.

>somali journalists
They have those in Somalia now?

>>38210
techincally he was working al-Shabab

>>38209
I glad they covered the execution and brought out the mardi gras ropes for the occasion. The though of this inbred buffoon, chewing khat, wagging his fat finger in the air, and telling you how to do your job alone is utterly repulsive.

>>38148
Assad kills more people than ISIS.
ISIS kills more ISIS fighters than anyone else.
Terrorism is less threatening to western civilization than any number of things people don't talk or care about (including rust).

>>38151
Rust is a good game

>>38158
http://www.theatlantic.com/magazine/archive/2015/03/rust-never-sleeps/384972/