/CPD/ CHICAGO POLICE SCANNER GENERAL - ANOTHER DUMPSTER FIRE EDITION

Sage me I can't delete

>>132441053
Or save for next bump limit

>>132441053
Yeah go to other bread

>>132441436
the other thread being >>132441028
we'll get back to this one when that one hits 300

Bump for reserves

dont fall off bump

>>132442582
you cant bump your own thread.... thats why i offered.

>>132442965
it went up to the first page, so I'm guessing you can

>>132442965
I believe thats on /b/
Sage. Set my timer for 10 minute intervals

>>132443095
>>132443217
there was 15 seconds between our posts that
why it went up. trust me i have to bump with my mobile when cpd gets slow about 4am

>>132444699
The fucking teamwork /cpd/ is best

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>>132444699
>roommate hits guy in the head with a fork.
LOL wtf?!?!

Most are in >>132441028
Hang out there til it hits bump limit

Well done lads

>over 4000

AHAHAHHAHA can't fuck with it tonight. we gonna come over tomorrow morning lmao

>another FUCKING garage on fire

NYPD Officer shot about two hours ago in the Bronx 46 precinct.
Officer is in Critical condition in the hospital, perp is DOA on scene.

Scanner: https://youtu.be/BW4awyfW2Y4

flat lining?

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>>132447604
burning trash cans, garages, cars, and empty houses have almost become white noise at this point.

Fresh hot steaming meme. Without picrobert I had to pull a stock image and try to make it work. Still too dark?

anyone else hear Trump just now?

YOOO I DON'T KNOW WHAT I SAID AHHHH
I DON'T REMEMBAHHHHHHHHHHHHH

>open key trump impersonation

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>>132445994
Mister Furious was talking shit to Blue Raja and he took care of business against that motherfucker.

Did I just hear a Trump sound clip?

>>132447960
>YOOO I DON'T KNOW WHAT I SAID AHHHH
I DON'T REMEMBAHHHHHHHHHHHHH

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>>132447831

DAMNIT!

I'm not feeling very creative, but i felt like I should try because it's Nigmas.

>>132447604
the hard life of a garage

>Bullets, no gun...

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>>132447945
>>132447962
Take your political b8 to threads that care.

>>132447960
10-4

>>132447813
The scanner audio is brutal.

http://nypost.com/2017/07/05/nypd-officer-shot-on-duty-in-critical-condition/
>a suspect who came up and blasted her through the window without warning, sources said.
>“It was an attempted cop assassination,” one law enforcement source told The Post.
>The gunman approached the officer at 12:30 a.m. as she sat inside a temporary headquarters vehicle

>>132448108
did you not hear it anon..... i made that image you posted silly anon

>gunshot wound to the right ankle
>achilles heel area

>victim's condition is "good"
Well done, Robert!

>>132448108
not b8, it was loud and clear..

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>>132447828
Is this who's behind Crabby

What is going on with the condition thing?

>>132441053
Go Blackhawks.

My fucking ears hurt from 4 hours of headphones. Worth it.

>>132448299
stable is not a condition, they need "good" or "critical" as a condition

>>132448299

Stable is not a condition.
Meme from last season on the fourth.

>another trash can on fire

>two more, separate, cases of trashcan fires

>>132448200
Well I sure as hell didn't make it. Lots of mileage left for it though. Cheers, Robert.

>>132448372
Ahh okay.

>>132448341
Fuckin right Chicagoooo

>>132448279

Do you have at least 20 other chinaman pictures?

>cookies
The tamest thing I've heard on this channel

>hallucinating from eating cookies laced with marijuana

>33 y/o female ate some weed cookies and is now hallucinating

>trippin off the weed cookies lel

How many marijuanas were in those cookies???

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WHICH ONE OF YOU DID THIS

"Ahhh I don't know what I said! I don't remember!"

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CsaB3ynIZH4&feature=youtu.be&t=60 [Embed]

How did you put that over the scanner LMAO

Still drunk quick rundown lads? Thank you

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>>132448033
Sosa remembers

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>chick hallucinating from pot cookies
there must be more than that

>>132448372
>>132448420
"good", "poor", or "critical"
ftfy

>>132448411
i was only pointing out this is my /comfy/ not gonna derail with b8. the impersonation was funny as hell. he did it on purpose. assume he was making fun of a victim/complainant/perp

>>132448505

At least 7

Protip: that was not marijuana

>arguing with the doorperson
What a vapid cunt

>>132448461
not on my current flash

>>132448566
Oh shit, he wasn't making fun of Trump, he was using Trump's meme to make fun of someone. That's hilarious.

>beaten by an unknown male

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>>132448299
>>132448372

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24 YEAR OLD MALE BLACK

>Male Black named Odee's Nix

>>132448559
I heard good, serious, and critical earlier today

>>132447945
I sure did.

>(((polaski)))

>remove intoxicated aggressive panhandler from McDonalds

> Please remove the intoxicated panhandler who is aggressive with people

Who the fuck is panhandling at 3 am

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>>132448566
Fair enough. I'm a returning vet from last summer. I like your crabby dispatch drawfag works. Stay comfy, Robert.

all those poor, innocent trash cans

One very cheery robert

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>>132448556
>>132448605
remember that fat nigger wannabe ralphie may? he was scheduled to do a comedy show in denver and it was cancelled because he couldn't even talk, let alone do the show. when he was arrested he looked confused as fuck.
protip: if you eat enough weed, you will trip the fuck out

Oh man Niggy Smalls is on the loose

>>132448794

Drug addicts

>>132447813
Jesus fucking christ that's rough to listen to

>>132448873

I mean to say... who are they panhandling to? Who is still out and about at 3 am in residential neighborhoods?

>females trying to fight the female caller
>man passed out in a gray Rav4

>Officer Erica is calling, group of females trying to fight her
Robert to the rescue

Would you go on a ride along with a real Robert /cpd/?

>passed out in a Rav4
completely out of hand

>>132449020
of course

>>132448980

Drunk white folks. Like me when I go out to the bars.

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>>132449013
ROBERT'S GONNA SMASH THAT

i came because i thought this would give me a good laugh but this has just made me sad as fuck

>>132449020
it would sure get the testicles quaking

>>132449020
Hell yes. Alone, never.

>>132448794
You ever been to a large city at night? Panhandlers panhandle at all hours. Fucking lazy shits. We should be able to hunt them like animals.

>>132448707
Yeah, we also heard "fair" a little while ago. Which sounds synonymous with "stable" if you ask me. But dispatch doesn't seem to sass about those phrases like how they get triggered by "stable".

>>132449079
Go to Walgreens, buy some redpills and a blackpill, take them and wait a few months. Then come back for a good time

>>132449020
any time

>dark complected black male
black as night

>>132449079

You're just not /comfy/, snacks are on the table and beer is on tap.

I wonder what happened to the gorillian guns Sassy was talking about before she clocked out.

>>132449128
subject is in yeet condition

>Having a problem with her daughter's friend
>17
Fucking hell

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>>132449185
>white invaders
lol. i thought it was a made up version of complexion, but it is indeed a real word

>>132448197
She didn't make it. RIP.

I've been mostly lurking, but just wanted to wish all you Roberts Happy Fourth of July and tell you that I hope you are all /comfy/ af, that you have success in your endeavors and that you all find happiness and fulfillment. Goodnight.

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>>132449079
only the animal or child abuse calls are depressing, but i get full 10/10 mad immediately when a kid calls about his fighting parents or someone calls about a dog getting abused

>>132449353
night robert

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>>132449020
yes, especially after Illinois goes bankrupt and has to stop EBT payments

>>132449353
thank you robert. be well

>she's bipolar and violent

>>132449353
Happy 4th Robert. We always /comfy/ with Robert at the reigns. Sleep tight

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>>132449079
If we don't laugh at the angry drunk step-dad trying to break into a 13yr-old girl's bedroom, who will?

>>132449353
thanks robert, goodnight and stay comfy

>no description
I'm pretty sure we could narrow it down.

>>132449417
had a 3yo call 911 drunk father was yelling in background. thursday or friday. chapped my ass. i only have sympathy for kids and animals.

>>132449534
I don't know why but I picture the loli to look like Brooke Shields from Pretty Baby.

Refuse EMS = warrant

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>>132449353
Good night and stay comfy, Robert.

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>>132449534
that's kinda creepy but i see your point

>>132449617
3 yo knows to call 911 when degenerate dad is off his hinges. fuckin sad

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>>132449617
reality really is the worst nightmare of all, and anyone who says otherwise is a newfag

>>132449730
Kek. Imaging dispatch saying
>1224 Robert, that fucking baby is calling again, complains of a disturbance with the step dad this time

>>132449689
That call was a few months ago. No conclusion by sunrise when I called it a night. ;_;

>>132449771
this is true. the world is much worse than anything fiction can dream up.

>>132449771
ha that reminds me of the feelsguy nightmare goggles meme. it resonates

>>132449829
even worse. the baby is standing outside in pullups giving a report to Robert like a pro.

TEEEENNNN FOOOUURRR

t. Roberto the Faggot

TEEEEEEEEEEEEN

FOOOOUUURRRRRRRR~

>>132449860
>feelsguy
Hi, read-it!

933 Robert still too damn happy

>>132449860
he has a name

I like this P-Scanner thread stuff. I would like one for every shit city. It could be its own sub-/pol/.

I hope the have better trigger discipline than key discipline.

>Ghostly Dispatch

>>132450088
What about echo discipline? Some cops have these weird echo robot voices going on.

4 people on his front porch.
wtf if 4 niggers posted up on my porch there is gonna be four dead niggers in my yard.

Lot of people shot with fireworks

>need an ambulance for a mental

>>132450171
Don't worry, no charge for them.

>>132449834

>read-it
nah

>>132449964
he does, i think its polish or something

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>>132450059
rhymes with

>>132450166
Equipment issues.

>>132450271
>responds to same post twice
10-4

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gn

>>132450271
Wow

>>132450289
woback! hehe

lmao. "got a slumper"

>>132450289
>>132450468
shit forgot the L meany woblack

>packages
>heading northbound, into the bushes

>dark-skinned male with packages in the hand
>in the bushes
>heading northbound after trying to get into cars

>commercial alarm
>auto accident
>EMS call at South Wabash
>southbound male traveling in the bushes

>4 MALE BLACKS and a MALE WHITE break into Whole Foods

daaark skinned male with packages wanderin through the bushes. Uganda FedEx???

>4 male blacks and a male white broke open the door at whole foods

I didn't know they sold purple drank at Whole Foods?

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>>132450468
>>132450575
YOU HAVE TO WOBACK haha

>>132450639
>>132450676
Gotta get that organic gluten-free cocaine, my dudes.

>>132450676
male white is the only one that knows what the fuck to steal in there

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>>132450717

Stealing meat to resell

>shell casings at one crime scene
>blood at the other

>>132450799
You know who the fuck chose Whole Foods

>>132450717
that really made me laugh

>first nig in bushes tonight almost have a bingo

>gunshot wound to the upper back
>serious condition

>victim in serious condition, gunshot wound to upper back

>>132450836
The male blacks probably thought it was "Ho Foods."

>>132450909
>4 male black and one male white @ whole foods
>male white
probably the inside man.

according to hey jackass we tied 2013 with 63 wounded but fell short of dead nigs. 8 this year vs 15 dead then.

>>132451000
probably works there

>person shot and drove himself to the hospital

Anybody know how many gunshot victims we've had tonight beyond lots?

>>132451032
God damnit

>>132451000
What I meant was that he probably suggested to go there and they misheard him. It's a shame.

>>132450909
It's horrifying to think a white guy with a gang of nigger henchmen raiding whitey's pantry to get them proper nutrition so they can become bigger, stronger, faster, and not sluggish like they would be on shitty food.

The implication here is horrifying....it could be the start of a Planet of the Apes scenario where the white guy is their Caesar.....

>>132451104
Anon you're not thinking. They can't afford Whole Foods. When they break in, Robert turns them into amusing statistics

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Fuck Chicago. Let it burn.

https://youtu.be/pFSw9UORIyY

>2:43
>backlogged
Christ

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>>132451061
i smell a promotion in your near future young robert.

>>132451188
You think that but deep down....it's the beginning of the Battle for the Planet of the Apes......dear god....

>we're on a backlog so....it may be a while before we're there
>domestic violence at west augusta

Khan is pissed. got his bomb belt stolen and now he can't jihad the IHOP in a couple hours

>ex-boyfriend ahmad hamed beat her up

Male Arab makes his first appearance of the night.

>>132451243

Too many fireworks calls

>/gathering/

>>132451312
There can only be one...nig....

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sJr_G7rKusI

>Hyundai sonata
fucking wew

>>132451302

Not a big presence here as far as I can tell. I had some A rab regulars where I work. Kept my eye on them and they don't show up anymore. Same with all coalburners.

>several shots fired at 5-4 and Wood

>>132451279
It actually makes sense to rob an uppity hipster place like that on a night like this. Have they evolved or was this MALE WHITE's idea?

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>>132451473

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Sometimes I pretend you guys are talking about me when you go on about Robert.

>2 SHOTS
2 SHOTS

The shots are back.

>>132451469
A couple weeks ago 3 of them dragged a handcuffed guy into the woods.

ALL THESE SHOTS FIRED, BUT WHERE THOSE DED BODIES AT?!

>>132451554
male white has to be the brains of the operation.

Fucking Augusta damn

>shots fired at Kirkman and Ogden
>car flipped over at Addison and Clinton

>>132451599
>The woods

What?

Ahmed Hamad is still beating his girl. deport him

>2 males blacks
>2 females blacks
Fighting.

>hit in the face with a bottle

>>132451741
waiting for the train. get hit with nighttrain instead

>MALE BLACK PLEASURING HIMSELF

>he was also pleasuring himself

>offender pleasuring himself

oh fuck that. poor Robert that has to go arrest a nig jerkin off

>MALE BLACK PLEASURING HIMSELF
he's taunting you robert. u just gonna take that shit??

>>132451814
>>132451833
Lmao, wasn't sure if I heard that right!

>victim 1
>shot in the hand and thigh
>victim 2
>shot in the left foot

>>132451919
Another >footshot

Thats 100 shootings at least by my count tonight

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>>132451276
awww sarge

>Latin Dispatch

hey does the cpd actually know of this online community of autistic supporters?

just back, here last night, and earlier this afternoon. kids are asleep long ago, friends are done, fire is doused.. anything fun I missed? other than the normal naked male black crap?

>>132451919
>victim 3
>cant stop jerking off
>[something female white], latina helping mentioned

>>132452061
they are aware somewhat

>>132452061
Yes another anon said they rarely acknowledge it though.

>>132452061
We had a Robert who posted here. Got caught by Sargent. So at least 2 know

>running car for 2 hours
Fucking pollutionists

>>132451958
shootings are not why we are here. we need bodies and coroner calls.

>>132452113
2 machete attacks
roommate hit with a fork
fires everywhere
people passed out at the wheel
fights
fights
drunk woman wandering into random house
lotsa people hit with bottles

Is that another body? Or 2 casings from where? Is that the camry?

>>132452301
You forgot the male black in the bushes. And the masterbator.

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>everyone crashin tonight

I think the kill count is low for the night. likely to be revised up after the sun comes up and they find a bunch more dead bodies laying around

>>132452301
>>132452113
You missed
>dude shot in the arm, ass, and twice in the head
>dude missing half of his head, possible from a fireworks accident

>>132452398
oh shit right.
black stroking it in public
Uganda FedEx worker lost in bushes

>>132452061
yes, they once came over the radio saying "and to the thousands listening" they know and watch these threads. with all that free fed money, they can hire folks to monitor "the web". CPD did post a cap of one of these pages on their fb a while back

>>132452405
not yet

waiting for more

>>132452462
half head nigga too.
sorry Robert it's been a long night of drinkin.

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>>132452061
There was also a robert that would blast Sandstorm once in a while last summer. I think he knew.

>>132452301
>>132452462
thanks.
fork is an unexpected weapon
was he launching a mortar from his head?
>yes that happened last year
again thanks for the update

car parts... all over everywhere

>>132452683
They specifically said 'Hit with a fork'
kek

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>>132452301
missed
>stolen construction vehicle (occupant armed with AR-15)

>>132452683
dunno. just random screaming women in the background and Robert telling dispatch dude was missing half his head.

Asian dangling other Asian over bridge, can't forget that one.

>>132452683
No idea. There was a call that said nothing beyond "fireworks accident" followed shortly by Robert reporting a guy with half of his head gone

>another porch on fire

>won't leave starbucks

>asian male and a male black
why not male asian?

>Wife complaining about and Asian male and and a MALE BLACK
>When you're so used to Black crime you refer to and Asian man as an 'Asian male' and a Black man as MALE BLACK

Did it go silent?

>uuhhhhh sure
thats a couple times now. not feelin it tonight

Tribune says "more than two dozen shot" in most recent article, but the one from a few hours earlier says "about 60 shot, 8 of them dead"

https://archive.is/Nq16A
https://archive.is/PU4Hk

>>132452937
Negative Robert, fix (then check) your keys fast Robert

>>132452061

I hooked some roberts up with doughnuts a month or so ago. I almost spaghettied but I kept it in and told them thanks instead.

>>132441053
Dude i don't know how all of your nazi bullshit appear always in the threads but you are very fuckin annoying ... GENERAL RETARD EDITION KYS

>>132453137
Check your keys you filthy slut

>Revenge of the Chain Snatchers

>>132453137
what are you on about?

>>132453137
get lost sharedblue

>>132453250

Don't respond to vermin, it's not /comfy/

>>132453263
>>132453305
He's upset we're not in one of the (actually) 57 CNN threads

"Robert finds A Casing" and other childrens books from RedPill publishing

>>132453342
haven't checked the catalog all night. glad I haven't

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female black shot

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>>132453439
This was from earlier when I was arguing with that reddit spacing faggot

damn. another shot

>>132453499
dear lord...the spamming

>>132452833
porches and fences burn easily it seems. when in a roman candle battle, don't dive behind something flammable, and use a metal trash can lid as a shield not a plastic one

>>132453342
>>132453439
whoa shit, i didn't check it either. i had this night reserved for robert.

>>132453539
over 50 there, with 2 more lines I couldn't get in there. Official /comfy/ space of /pol/ right here

Robert made over 50 preventive arrests for the festivities

>>132453499

Why? CNN got caught threatening to doxx someone, but all these threads? Nevermind. I don't care.

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>if only that kid on the big wheel was wearing a diaper, I'd have a coverall for the holiday weekend. Or even the oldtimers patient who escaped.

>>132453683

damn, anon. That autism is impressive.

>>132453064
"The night Chicago died". I hear that song almost as an ear-worm during this crap

bitch has a warrant. all the sudden she needs to go to the hospital.

>The other rollover

Multiple rollover wrecks. Fuck me.

It's been fun Roberts, but my ears really hurt. Thanks for a /comfy/ night. Happy 4th of July, and God Bless America

>>132453947
good night Robert. stay comfy

>>132453604
My man.

holy shit. brown ford explorer just dumped a dead body out.

>>132453876
out here it's mostly atv rollovers with organ donors, and they guy that hit a tree with his boat
>St Louis Cty, MN

>>132454130

This is city driving. It's a bit fucked

is there any city that comes close to the action in chicago?

He's driving with a revoked driving license, gang affiliation and parolee stuts. But otherwise he's clean.

don't step in the leadership, Robert

alley covered in hurl. don't come up the alley. jesus Christ what did that guy eat?

>>132454319
Mardi Gras in New Orleans. That is insane. (February)

>Winnebago
LONE STARR!!!!

14/15 beers in

Condition update: Stable

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>>132454507

>>132454506
what about the other black infested shitholes like camden nj, or Los Angeles

does someone want to remake.... so i can keep it up for the couple of us left as well as the anons who wake up and join in the am for a few hours.

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>>132454507

>>132454649
There's only one man who would dare give me the raspberry.... MALE BLACK!!

>>132454631
no idea. ive heard detroit was even better till cops gave up and it was like 2 hour response to a gunshot call

>>132454632

I've never OP'd. I'll do it if you wont.

>>132454701

You've just been blacked.

>>132454722
Detroit is slow but some crazy shit happens, haven't listened to it in a while though

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>wana play guess the mugshot... mail or female

Ass opposed to harming someone with non violence...

NIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIINE THIRTY THREE RAHBERT

>>132454856
that's what happens to your hair after decades of wearing a hair hat, just imagine the smell of her weave

>>132454758
if you dont mind just copy paste body. copy subject. hit reply to op in this thread and copy the >>post# change it in bottom of pasta body. image the post

>>132454952
What spirit. Bless him.

>>132454856
The facial stubble makes me want to say male, but the lips and eyes look female. Though it could simply be a pink shirt bias. So I'm gonna say Male.

>>132454961
>>132455016

Gender Female

DOB 1967

Race Black

CCN 5284

Height 5'07 ft.

Weight 285 lbs

Eyes Brown

Hair Black

Arrested 07/02/2017

>>132455016
no adams apple

>>132455073
Oh damn. The lack of jewelry and makeup threw me off, too. I think this is why most black women seem repulsive to me, they have a mannish face.

BURGER KANG

When will the new bread be made?

>>132455354
WE WUZ ROBBIN KANGZ N SHIET

waiting on >>132454758
>>132455396
i cant make been getting an error all night

new bread
>>132455473
>>132455473
>>132455473
>>132455473
>>132455473
>>132455473
>>132455473

>>132441053
>>132441053
>>132441053
>>132441053
>>132441053
New /comfy/ lounge
>>132441053
>>132441053
>>132441053
>>132441053
Police Line
>>132441053
>>132441053
>>132441053
>>132441053
Doughnut Cross

>>132455610

This is why I don't OP. HAHAHAHA.

>>132455572
>>132455610
Uhhhh...

>>132455659
tis ok you did great man thank you. i kept searching catalog till i saw it

>>132455671

I baked this>>132455572 But fucked up the link. Robert had my back.

>>132455671
look at it again... it directs you here.. he just copied wrong op post number no biggie follow mine
>>132455473

>>132454856
Gorillas really aren't known for the sexual dymorphism, huh?