RGRE: Reversed Gender Roles Equestria

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>>28920954
>Best RGRE image

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>>28920954
>you horny bastards are runing my thread
>that means i can enjoy every night

>>28920954
m-muh vagina

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>>28920954
nice

>>28921312
1. Cow
2. Dog
3. Goat
4. Horse
5. Cat
6. Bunny

How shits my taste?

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Cow

>>28921364
Wow. I would legitimately not hit that. I learned today that I apparently still have standards, albeit extremely low ones.

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>>28921405
>anon why do you never make eye contact when we make love
>anon I have never seen you hold any of our kids
>anon why do you cry

>>28921525
But that is not your husbando its your wife

>>28921533
7.25/10 would still smash.

>>28921350
Not much, they're all on there.

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>>28921592
You underestimate my power.

>man it sure is stories in here.

>>28921650
>anon see cow
>cow say go in kitchen
>anon go in kitchen
>anon drink milk in fridge
>cow say anon cow married
>anon touch the cow

>>28921364
Raricow a cute.
I wouldn't mind seeing a RGRCowE story.

>>28921592
Yes, I would.

Guess I'll dump what I have before bed

>>28917508
>You are Applejack, and girl are you furious
>Those wood 'fer brains lumberjills were getting close to your trees again.
>Varmints, the whole lot of 'em.
>You had been keeping tabs on their wanton path through the forest near your orchard, but they got to your border faster than anticipated.
>They must have gotten a new secret weapon to wage war against you and your tree lovin' kin.
"Git! Git you darn morons. This is private property!"
>You shoo a few of them away by slapping a metal pan against a tree.
>You really need to build a fence, but you have been so busy this season.
"Ah thought ah told 'yer formare to keep headin south, this is north!"
>A tree falls a short distance away nearly crashing into one of your own.
"Darn it, that almost hit 'mah apple tree!"
>The last of the remaining lumberjills scamper off in fear, they know what they did.
>"Sorry miss, I guess we got a little ahead of ourselves."
"A'hve told you lot once, a'hve told you a th-"
>You stop as you turn to face the owner of that strangely deep voice.
>You have to crane your neck back to look up at it due to its height.
>Your jaw works silently for a moment as it looks apologetically down at you.
>"Sorry, it's my first day, and I think we are a little ahead of schedule. The foremare must not have noticed we got off the path we were supposed to follow."
>The new secret weapon of the lumberjills is a right evil force to be reckoned with.
>They have given up all decency and have resorted to tamperin' with 'yer heart.
>They have unleashed reckonin' upon you, but you must fight back for the sake of the farm!
"W-well, now... Yah see..."

>>28921687
>Darn it girl, get it together.
"Just m-make sure it d-don't happen again."
>The sweat is pouring as you muscle out the words over your tied tongue.
>Darn his pretty face, and to tartarus to that outfit he is wearing.
>Darn thing is sticking to him and soaked with his sweat.
>Huggin' his every curve.
>Oh Celestia the fragrance coming offa' him.
>"Terribly sorry, won't happen again."
>You want to point out its the third time this year, but yer mouth has betrayed you.
>The majestic stallion nods appologetically and gives you a winnin' smile, you fight against the weakness in 'yer knees.
>He leaves, and in moments you recompose 'yerself.
"Shoot, he must be new in town..."
>You don't reckon you ever saw anything like him before.
"Ah might have to have a talk with Timber over that getup, that's right too lewd..."
>Seriously, who wears socks in public?

>You are Twilight Princess of all of Ponyville.
>You are doing very important princess duties.
>"Twilight, don't you think this is kinda creepy? I'm pretty sure if the ponice see this you would have to pardon yourself."
"Hush Spike, I have never seen anypony like that before. Heck, I didnt even know minotaurs could have children with other species."
>"I don't think they are minotaurs Twi."
"Well ofcourse they aren't, they are half minotaur."
>"No, I mean I don't think they have any minotaur in them."
>You turn your attention from your telescope to look at Spike.
"What makes you think that?"
>"Call it a man's intuition, but they don't have cow heads."
>You wave off the notion of stallions having a supernatural ability to know things.
>Sure Pinkie has a supernatural sixth sense, but that is an isolated incident.
>No way all men have one.
>Right?

>>28921694
>Looking back through your telescope you try to find those three strange ponies again, but all you can see is blue.
"Odd, the sky shouldn't be down there..."
>"Twilight."
>You look up from the telescope at the sound of the deadpanned voice to see Rainbow Dash.
"Oh uhh... Hey Rainbow... How's it uh, going?
>"I see you noticed them too huh?"
>You blush slightly at having been caught peeping on ponies from your balcony.
>"You do know everypony can see this huge thing sticking out the balcony right?"
"I was conducting important research I'll have you know."
>"Yeah well conduct the research on their dad."
"Their dad? Rainbow I don't know if now is the time to-"
>Rainbow grabs the end of the telescope and points it off towards the edge of Ponyville.
>Looking through it, you are graced with the sight of a completely alien being.
>Tall, green, muscular, and covered in lewd clothes.
>"I'm out, no way I'm going to sit here with you pervs."
>Spike shakes his head and hops off the chair next to you before storming out of the room.
>"Is that outfit legal? Because if it isn't you should make sure it is."
"Shh, im doing important princess... Things."
>You adjust the telescope to zoom in on his butt.
"Very important..."

More to come tomorrow.

>>28921697
Is good but needs more cow

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>>28921687
>>28921694
>>28921697
legit made me laugh.

>>28921697
Anon should have had four daughters. Unspecified, Unidentified, Unclassified and Unnamed.

That way when they all get together
THE FIRE RISES

>>28921697
I like it.

>>28921694
>>"Call it a man's intuition, but they don't have cow heads."
>man's intuition
>man
HOL UP HOL UP

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>>28921901
take this.

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>>28921901
>man
>not cow
There is no thread there is only cow

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>>28922043
Cow

>>28921697
This is great.

> Dragons play Horses and Hoards
> Role-playing as drakes, wyverns, etc trying to gather a proper hoard while subjugating the lesser races
> Some play uprising campaigns, taking the role of lesser race leaders, working against their draconian oppressors
> Humans are too OP, but half-human characters are more common
> Incredible charisma, high intelligence, skill at complex machinery, and of course, indiscriminate taste in mates
> Awkward dragonettes sit around a stone slab, playing an all human male campaign to lay the dragon
> The traditional gaming forum walls have many carvings complaining about those sorts of CM's
> "Dare you enter my magical realm?"
> Other monoliths are dedicated to erotic human sculpture and engraved texts
> "Lay the slayer"
> "I'm ovulating so hard right now."
> "Stop, my cloaca can only gape so wide"
> Something something Anon is pursued by dragon ladies

>>28922168
>tfw you are the magical realm
Feels good

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>>28922132
Cow

>>28922168
>I'm ovulating so hard right now."
> "Stop, my cloaca can only gape so wide"
Ok, I need to take a few minutes to compose myself now.

>>28922168
>>28922407
kek

>>28921697
>green skin
just say peachy brown, don't go full anon body suit shit

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>>28922168
>>28922407
>Here There Be Dragons is abandoned.
Someone needs to pick the mantle up.

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>>28922501

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>>28922501
There is no dragon
There is only cow

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>>28922168
>I'm ovulating so hard right now."
> "Stop, my cloaca can only gape so wide"

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>>28922597
There is no ovulating
There is no cloaca
There is only Zule
Zule is a cow

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>>28921668

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>>28922646
No, ork

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>>28922665
Cow

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>>28922671
Ork

Are we /furry/ now?

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>>28922688
Cow!

>>28922558
>>28922612
I want to see Anon herd a dragoness and a minomoo.

>>28922696
Looks more /tg/ to me

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>>28922697
Ork

OrcAnon in Equestria when?

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This is all looking very not pony related, let alone rgre.

>>28922724
Seeing how anon usually acts I would say that he was one from the beginning
>>28922731
It's just a few colts getting there hare done and arguing what race has the tightest pussys

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>>28922750
>there
>hare

>>28921697
More please.

>This isn't right
>I shouldn't be here
>Where's Twilight?
>Why did I wander off...
>Why is everything so big?
>It can't be a dragon's dwelling
>There's too much flammable stuff
>And no hoard

>A deep voice echoes through the room
"What brings you here little drake?"
>Spike froze in place
"Seeking treasure and riches to add to your hoard, perhaps? A pile of gems and gold large enough for one such as I to lay upon?"
"If so, you'll be disappointed."
>Spike slowly turned around to see the owner of the voice.
>He looked up.
>And up.
>And paled.
>He, somehow Spike knew it was a he, was massive.
>Spike didn't even come up to his knees.

>It was a Giant.
>A real Giant.
>Giant's aren't supposed to be real

>>28922777
Checked
Also continued

>>28922777
Neat, an interesting prompt and holy trips at the same time.

Continue.

>>28922777
Someone make this happen, the trips demand it.

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Anon, please. put it on pastebin.

>>28922777
More and nice trips

Why don't mares ever learn?
Why do they always put crazy in the pussy?

>>28922955
Crazy often doesn't seem crazy until after it's too late

And Crazy puts out.

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>>28921592
With heavy artillery.

>>28921697
Moar, Moar, Moar!

I hear a rumor...
Luna have a black hole.

If anyone was interested in an rgre eqg setting, I think we got a premise to work on now.

https://derpibooru.org/1300261?scope=scpedc9baa83c4a29465087ddf899221bd1b38b4d23a

kind of depressing when the art is that cute

>>28923406
NO!

NO SADS FOR TACOHORSE

>>28923382
>Black hole
Goddamit anon. luna's black hole is danger role.
Are ready to fuck that hole?

>>28921808
>Anon has a new child with a pony from Ponyville
>Names it "Redacted"

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>Instead of Equestria, Anon ends up in Griffonstone
>He's almost immediately set upon by grifniks who want to steal his socks
>But one of them, a gruff hen named Gilda, distracts them and helps him escape with his purity intact
>When Anon sees the poverty she lives in, he's horrified and insists on helping her somehow
>There are no hiring businesses in the kingdom, but Anon is somehow able to find baking supplies
>Gilda puts together a stand and starts selling his scones
>Yadayadayada I just want to fuck the gopnik catbird okay?

When the fucking fuck did this shitty cow anthro shit take over the RGRE thread? >>28922043

>>28923468
Please
>My name is "Nobody"

>>28923594
Please
>My name is "Not Important"

>>28923570
Fair enough
>Griffons, being predators, are a bit more violent and territorial than they are overprotective of their mates
>Less "Of course my male can't go out and work at a job, what if the poor thing gets an ouchie?"
>More "If you touch my male's dick I'll skin you, turn you into a rug, put you in front of my fireplace, and fuck my man on top of you after a romantic evening"
>Actual fights have sprung up because griffons thought that Anon was romantically involved with Gilda and wanted to fight her for Anon

>>28923633
>Anon has child with a pony and names the offspring "No Name"
>Lives in Ponyville with a pony with No Name

>>28923647
>"Did you see that!?"
>"Yeah! I know!"
>"Unf~ Look at that flank"
>"M-muh vagina"
>"Oh my"
>meanwhile "No name" and "No Important" also his elder brother "Nobody"
>No name and No important are start fighting something with the stick of justice
>While Nobody was reading his father's novel "The Last Kingdom"

>>28923633
His child grows up with self-esteem issues.

>>28923633
Please
>My name is "Reaper"

>>28923593
That's my fault because of the mino story I did last thread. I try and keep the little one shots really spaced out so they don't get in the way or annoy people who don't like the minotaur stuff too much. It might just be someone who really likes them and really wants more or shitposting because they want it to stop.
Sorry about that.

>>28923738
But does he fear her?

>>28923950
It's not your fault, it's what I will do whenever we throw a shit fit when a writer has a fetish we don't like

>>28924142
Could be worse. There are some threads out there that freak out when a writer interprets a character differently than what's accepted by the thread.

>>28923570
>want to steal his socks
So he encountered little Gabby first?

>>28923636
How do prides work, then?

>>28923677
engrish ahoy

>>28923416
It's okay. See?

https://derpibooru.org/1300995?scope=scpeba321d5e0d88e88a1e7b235171b4a8f0d49ad646

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>>28924690
you monster, MAKE HER HAPPY NOW!

>>28924690
The people that laugh the most are the people that stay awake at night, unable to sleep because they had that dream again.
The one where they're all alone.
Again

Holy shit its devoid of green in here, lemme fix that.

>>28921697
>You are Anonymous.
>Finally home after a long day at work.
>It is kind of nice that there was an opening for a nice and easy manual labor job.
>Normally you had to get cooking or cleaning jobs, but this time you were in luck that some pony stood up for you.
>Odd name though, who calls their kid Bundle of Sticks?
>No self respecting parent, that's who.
>Opening the door to your home the aroma of cooking greets you.
"Mmm, smells good. What's for dinner?"
>"Dad!"
>You are greeted by a chorus of three girls bounding over to embrace you, the combined force knocking you off your feet.
>You laugh as you gather them up in a bear hug before standing up and letting them go.
>"I made chicken alfredo for supper."
>Incognito strikes a triumphant pose with her hands on her hips, nose in the air as if to bask in your adoration.
>You pat the top of her head eliciting a snooty laugh from her, and looks of envy from your other daughters.
"Wow, you managed to get meat? This town seemed mostly pony."
>"Den found a boy gryphon and sweet talked him to give us a discount on it."
>Your canine daughter says with a mischievous look.
"*gasp* Is my little girl already preparing to fly from my nest? Oh woe is me, what is a father to do?"
>"No, she lies! I told a sob story about my single father raising us all on his own I swear!"
>Unidentified waves her arms frantically as she explains herself.
>A sinister look appears on your face as you chuckle at the thought of saving on meat prices.
>"Ooh, that's the face! I was trying to do that earlier!"
"Hmm, why? What were you up to?"
>Unspecified opens her mouth to excitedly tell you when realization hits her and she shuts her mouth and covers it.
>This elicits you raising an eyebrow as you stare silently into her eyes.
>It takes less than a minute before she breaks.
>"O-okay! I give!"
>Her ears lay flat against her head.
>"There was a pony looking for you, but she smelled funny."

>>28925405
"Funny bad, or funny ha ha?"
>Your draconic daughter cuts in before the others can answer.
>"Funny bed."
>It takes all of your self discipline not to laugh at the pun.
>Curse being a dad, you remember when puns weren't funny.
>"Come on, lets forget about that, supper is gonna get cold."
>Your avian daughter grabs your hand and pulls you towards the dining room, trying to change the topic.
>You know how lucky you are to have three daughters that look out for you.
>Something seems off however, looking over your shoulder at the window with the blinds drawn you can't shake the feeling that someone is watching you.

>You are Princess Celestia.
>You are watching Anonymous through a scrying spell.
>The silver water basin you cast the spell from depicts him sitting down to have dinner with his family.
>A look of fatherly love on his face as he pats one on the head, but you can't hear what he says.
>"Sister, art thou coming? The chefs have prepared dinner."
>Luna opens the door without knocking, giving you no chance to hide your shame.
>Thinking quickly you kick the basin over, sending it clattering and spilling its contents while shattering the spell.
"H-hey Luna... What uh, what brings you here?"
>Your sister adopts a confused look as she stares at the upturned basin in the pool of water it once held.
>"Sister, did I come at a bad time? thou knowest to hang a slipper on the door if you-"
"No! I wasn't doing that!"
>You practically scream as your face goes red.
>"Oh, pray tell what were you doing then?"
"I was uhh... Checking up on a villain who moved back into the area recently."
>"Ooh, let me fetch mine axe. It hath been a long time since we last hunted villainy."
>You gasp and run after your sister as she excitedly turns and runs for her own room.
"No! He's reformed!"

>>28925412
>Your sister skids to a halt and you nearly run into her.
>"He?"
"Well, yeah. You know, its kind of a long story."
>"So what, werest thou merely checking upon him to make certain he wasn't up to his olden ways?"
"Y-yeah... That's right."
>Your sister contemplates on this for a moment before looking back at you with a questioning expression.
>"And what were this villain's olden ways exactly?"
>You heave a sigh, glad to have her on a more managable path of questioning.
"About fifteen years ago he popped up, nopony knows where from. He was unstoppable, immune to booping, tickling, or warm blankets."
>This draws an impressed look to your sister's face.
"And he wielded a magical axe, that had the power to conquer any foe. He sowed chaos across the land I had not seen the likes of since Discord.
>"How did you stop him?"
>A complicated expression makes it to your face.
"He stopped himself. Somewhere along the line he managed to impregnate three females of differing species. After they dumped the children on him he stopped his tour, and decided to live the quiet life of a single father.
>"Wait, tour?"
"Yes, with his magical axe he played melodies of power that was beyond pony comprehension."
>"You hath lost me sister, what kind of axe is used for music?"
>You pull your sister back to your room and open the bottom drawer of your dresser.
>Under a few folded dresses you retrieve a picture with worn edges, showing its age.
>Within the picture was the human Anonymous, wearing a studded leather vest that was open to reveal his chest and belly, worn blue jeans, biker boots, and cut off leather gloves.
>Within his hands was the artifact of unimaginable musical power, his guitar.
>"Why dost thou have this in here?"
"S-shut up Luna!"

And there we have it for now.

>>And there we have it for now.

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

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>>28925420

>>28925405
the names of the kids are so impersonal i have trouble remembering who is who

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>>28925420
>More stalk
>Extra Good
What next? Trixie? Shimmer? Starlight?

>>28925458
I'm with you there mate.

>>28925420
kek
He was a rockstar, fantastic.

>>28925458
>>28925469
That reminds me about an old thread something about /int/
He call himself... Twilight Sparkle in vietnamese language.

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>>28925420

wasn't LAP suppose to post something a thread ago? And where the fuck is BNW? I know a lot of the writers chat using discord, could one of you give us a heads up on the condition and activitie of the writers that haven't posted in a bit?

>>28925648
LaP is active, just edited something for him.

>>28925648
>tfw no one invited me
>>28925582
fuckable

>>28925648
BNW is dead, senpai.

>>28925405
>>Odd name though, who calls their kid Bundle of Sticks?
OP, what are YOU doing in this story?

>>28925853
Taken by the gods.

>>28926156
YES, PUNY MORTAL
WORSHIP YOUR MASTER
YOUR OVERLORD
I OWN YOUR SOUL

>>28926189
FALSE ONE!

WE DEMAND TRIBUTE.
YOU DESERVE NOTHING.
WE SEEK NOT WORSHIP
ONLY THE DEATH OF ALL WRITEFAGS
AND THE EVENTUAL DEATH OF THE UNIVERSE.

>>28926223
WILL COW KILL THE WRITEFAGS?

Furry shitposting this time? Gosh.

>>28926235
It's more /tg/ than furry to be honest

>>28926223
>No fur
>Skin problem
>Anime face
Fuck off.

>>28926209
Minotaur cow-person
>>28926223
>>28926232
Human woman with horns, cow-ears, and a tail

>>28926235
Just report it, none of these showed up in the show, and none are iron will or r63 iron will.

So would fat-Anon be seen as a chubby anime girl with big tits, or as that nasty obese black woman you see who doesn't wear enough clothes?

>>28926418
How fat is he?

>>28925420
Darnit. How old are Anon's daughters?
I can't imagine anything consistent based only on the information provided.

>>28926541
I was picturing around the 13-14 mark. Early teens at the most.

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>"Anon, I overheard you talking to Twilight about human history. Tell me, who was this 'Kneel StrongArm'? What was his crime? Why did your people work so hard to send him to the moon, rather than simply beheading him?"

>>28925648
Discord chat is a mistake.

>>28926597
Good prompt.

>>28926432
Not belly-hanging-over-the-belt fat.

>>28926597
kek
"It wasn't that bad. We brought him back after a few days."

>>28926666
The super devil tells the truth.

>>28926666
HOLY SHITTT! MAKE IT HAPPEN!!! GREEEN!
GREEEEEN!

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>>28926666
>6666
That the deeeviiiiil!

>>28926396
Nether has anon, or any non canon character, just because it's not from the show doesn't mean it doesn't belong here because the posts imply that the picture is from somewhere in the show setting
Furthermore iron will existing in the show should alow any Minotaur picture or discussion here as long as it pertains to the Minotaurs that could exist in setting.

But for clarity's sake? What features is ok and what aren't?

>>28926730
Shitposting dozens of WoW pics and anime 'cow'girls does not relate in any way to MLP, neither of those have anything to do with the show, if it was OC about or in the shows style I wouldn't give a shit, but this is neither.

>>28926730
The last one he post, it was a furry.

>>28926730
I think it would only feed the triggered anons if there was a set of rules regarding minotaur appearance. Using Iron Will as a guideline should be good enough.

>>28926768
Just let him get swept up. If he can't tell the difference between a minotaur and fucking anthro cows, then he's a tard bruh

>>28925420
>You are Rarity
>Out for a nice morning brunch with Fluttershy
"Say flutterhy, have you heard of the newest residents to Ponyville?"
>The yellow mare nods with a small smile on her face.
>"I hear its a single dad raising three kinds, I bet he's really nice."
"Yes, it seems these days stallions who can care for a family are hard to come by."
>"Rainbow was telling me he was fawning over her yesterday, he must be looking for a mare to help him out."
"Funny, I heard it was the other way around."
>You let out a giggle at the gossip, ready to unload.
>"Huh, who did you hear that from?"
"I may not have Apple Jack's ability to discern lies, but I do have a small purple dragon friend who happened to see Twilight and Rainbow using a telescope to spy on a certain stallion's butt.
>Fluttershy gasps and covers her mouth with a hoof.
>"Oh my..."
>You take another sip of your morning coffee as fluttershy takes another bite of her daisy sandwich.
>You glance over as something catches your eye and you nearly choke on your drink, fighting to keep from spitting it on your friend.
>There strolling down the road holding hands with two of his daughters, the third riding on his shoulders, is the stallion you were gossiping about.
>You eye his outfit, jaw slowly dropping.
>He had on shorts, a polo shirt, tennis shoes and socks up to his calf.
>What he was wearing was practically the entire DILF uniform.
"Fluttershy!"
>You whisper as urgently as possible.
>"Hmm? What is it?"
>The poor thing hasn't noticed him yet, so you frantically point your hoof.
>Following your gesturing she looks over and seems to freeze in place.
>"W-wow..."
>You appreciate the scene of him walking by for a moment more, before you catch somepony's eye.

>>28927408
>It was not his however.
>The half dragon riding on his shoulders had locked eyes with you, and she was not happy.
>You hurriedly look away, blushing at the unmarely behavior you were displaying.
>Flutterhy made a squeaking noise and pulled her neck in while covering her face with her hair, you assume the gaze was shifted to her.
>The two of you sit for a moment more in silence before you finally muster the courage to speak up.
"So, that was the new stallion huh?"
>"Y-yeah, it would appear so."
>Fluttershy nodded in agreement, slowly coming out of her own mane to look at you.
"He sure was something, wasn't he?"
>A grin makes it to your face.
>"Something dreamy."
>A blush makes it to Fluttreshy's face.
"A mare could have all kinds of lewd thoughts about a stallion who goes in public dressed like that.
>"I want his kids to call me mom."
>Your eyes widen at that one.
"Oh Fluttershy, you are a kinky one."
>The two of you share a laugh as you fantasize over the mare talk.

>You are Unidentified.
>This is tartarus.
>Dad got the day off work because they are ahead of schedule at work and have a surplus supply of wood.
>So this morning he decided to take your sisters and you out for brunch.
>He wore the outfit though.

>>28927417
>Your sisters and you have tried relentlessly to get him not to wear this one.
>He always has the same lame response that seems like its an inside joke noone else gets.
>'Is too late sergei, am dad now.'
>He claims its what dads wear, and you cant argue against that.
>You just wish it wasn't gathering as many hungry stares as it was.
>Everywhere he went in this outfit it was always the same.
>Mares would all stare, eyeing his socks hungrily.
>Stallions would avert their eyes and be shamed by how good the socks looked on his calfs.
>"Come on girls, one of my coworkers said this place makes amazing cupcakes."
"They didn't happen to recommend any place with eggs and bacon did they?"
>"No, they got squeamish when I asked that."
>You huff and shrug your shoulders, at least your bigger sister Specs seemed excited.
>"I hear that they have a dragon special too, instead of sprinkles it has gems on it."
>Great, now you have two sisters with wagging tails.
>As you near what you assume to be the place you feel like you are going to get diabetes from just looking at it.
>The entire building looks like a frosted gingerbread house.
>Dad leads you through the door, finally letting go of your sister's and your hands before setting Coggy down.
>"Alright girls, grab a seat and I'll get the cupcakes."
"Alright dad."
>You are just glad there doesn't seem to be any other customers here, and the only ponies working seem to be a husband and wife.
>Maybe it will be better in here than out there.
>picking one of the many empty booths your turn to your sisters before a serious look appears on all of your faces.
>"Let the winner reap the bounty and the losers acknowledge defeat."
>Coggy says with a stern expression, as Specs and you nod in approval.
"Rock, paper, Scissors!"
>All three of you yell as you throw your hands out.
>Triumph! you throw rock as both of your sisters throw scissors.
"Looks like today it will be me who sits by dad."

>>28927422
>You gloat over your victory for a moment as your sisters grumble and file into one of the booths, leaving you with the other side where dad will have to sit.
>You scooch into the booth, only to bump into something warm and furry.
"What the-"
>Looking over at what you bumped into you let out a scream as you find a pink pony who was not previously in this seat.
>The pony also screams along with you, matching your pitch and stopping when you stopped perfectly.
>"Hi, I'm Pinkie Pie."
>You clutch at your chest, trying to calm down.
>Your sisters likewise seem surprised, apparently they didnt see the mare sitting next to you until you bumped into her as well.
>"Hey, if you sit there dad won't have anywhere to sit..."
>"Specs is right, that seat is taken miss."
>You adjust your look into a frown and poke a clawed finger into the mare's chest.
"Hey, I won rock paper scissors. I get to sit by dad, and if you sit there I don't get t-"
>"I brought your order!"
>The mare seemingly ignoring your complaints pulls a tray out from behind her back.
>There was a cherry cupcake with gem sprinkles, a vanilla cupcake with sugar sprinkled over the frosting, a vanilla cupcake with birdseed, and a chocolate cupcake with chocolate frosting and bits of fudge sprinkled on top.
>You cast your gaze back at your dad who seemingly was still ordering.
>"Oh, and for me I would like the chocoholic's delight cupcake."
>"Coming right up sir."
>Your dad hands over the bits then heads over to the table raising an eyebrow.
>"Woah that was fast.
>Your sisters and you turn gaping expressions towards the pink mare sitting next to you.
>Specs is the first to react however has she reaches for a cupcake, hungry glee in her eyes.
>"Mine!"

>>28927427
>Dad with lightning speed slaps the cupcake out of her hands before grabbing it for himself.
>"This one is chocolate Specs, I dont plan on taking you to the hospital today.
>"Aww, but it smells so good...
>Specs whines as your other sister greedily snatches her gem encrusted treat.
>"So whose your new friend girls?"
>"Hi I'm Pinkie Pie! I work here at Sugarcube Corner!"
>Dad grabs a chair from a nearby table and slides it over to the booth before sitting down.
"Noooooo!"
>Dad eyes you questioningly as he takes a bite of his own confectionary treat.
>"What got into her?"
>Your dad drops a fudge sprinkle on the ground and leans down to get it, his shirt pulling out of his shorts and revealing his underwear.
>The mare smiles and starts to lean over the table for a better view.
>And there it is, there is the advance you knew was coming.
>Unfortunately for her she is too close to Specs right now, your big sister will show her what she gets for messing with dad.
>Specs lets out a low growl before starting to lunge forward, only to readjust her trajectory at the cupcake Pinkie slid towards her.
>Clever girl.
>You look at Coggy who should be breathing fire any moment now to scare the mare off.
>But it looks like she too has been done in by the cupcake she was provided.
>Instead of flames, a cool breeze comes out of her mouth leaving her with a look of surprise.
>Those gems must be enchanted or something.
>It is now up to you to save your dad!
>The mare makes to walk on the table towards your dad, but you grab her around the barrel and pull her down away from him.
>"Five second rule"
>Dad chuckles as he sticks the sprinkle in his mouth.

>>28927435
>He blinks a few times as he notices the scene drastically changed since he went down to pick up the sprinkle.
>"Whatever."
>Dad shrugs and digs back into his cupcake.
"What do you want?!"
>You whipser into the mare's ear threateningly.
>"To be your mom."
>She whispered back in a serious tone.
"WHAT?!"
>You squawk out.
>After sever trys now Coggy is starting to create sparks out of her mouth, like an old lighter about to finally catch.
>"Oh well, look at the time! Bye bye!"
>The mare bounds over the seat and retreats back behind the counter, turning before she enters the kitchen.
>"By Anon, see you later!"
>Your siblings and you sat there steaming, in Coggy's case smoke literally coming from her mouth.
>"She seemed friendly."
>Your dad says with a smile as he waves back at her.

We looked like we needed green, but this is all I have for today.

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>>28927417
>>"I want his kids to call me mom."

>>28927422
>>'Is too late sergei, am dad now.'
>Dad outfit
>Not a jeans-jacket, a t-shirt tucked into his pants, and a ball-cap

>>28927422
>"Rock, paper, Scissors!"
>>All three of you yell as you throw your hands out.
>>Triumph! you throw rock as both of your sisters throw scissors.
>"Looks like today it will be me who sits by dad."
God, why is your writing so CUTE?!

>>28927570
Nah, thats the colder weather dad outfit. Warmer weather brings the shorts and polo shirts.

>>28927604
While wearing socks with sandals and a fanny pack?

>>28925648
Amphetanon's hit some rough times IRL, I haven't heard from Sleepy in over a month (the last time we've talked was October 13), BNW is just busy as usual. Anyone else you're curious about?

>>28927710
Well, duh!

>>28927442
2cute, never stop

>>28927442
Anon, i'm gonna have to warn you, this is getting too cute.

>"Sir, i'm gonna have to issue you a ticket."
"Why?"
>"For walking home without my address."

>>28927408
>DILF uniform.
I LOVE YOU ANON!

>>28927729
Shuk.

>>28927888
>trips
>"Sir, pull over! You can't have an ass that fine without a license!"

>>28927888
>"Sir, what were you doing at 7 o'clock on the night of tomorrow evening?"

>>28927729
There's a discord channel?

>>28928418
Its a mistake, it was a big part of how Fingerbang died, our revival solely based on the writefags that refused to be a part of it.

>>28928011
Shuk's a bit busy, though I'm not really up when he's online. I assume he's busy writing or IRL stuff.

>>28928418
Yeah. BNW doesn't have a way to contact you, that's why we haven't sent you an invite.

>>28928461
RGRE hasn't died and won't die in the future. If anything, the Discord has helped us discuss ideas and help each other not kill ourselves and write. This is because we don't shoot an invite to just any up-and-coming writer with a name.

>>28928471
So should I post my email here or in my pastebin for contact purposes?

>>28928492
It'll be up to BNW to decide.

>>28928485
I am calling it on the Discord chat if everything fucks up, regardless of the unprecedented success it has had so far. I don't trust you or anyone that openly supports it, however seeing as I cant kick your ass personally, there is no one to stop it. I will be awaiting the fail so I can gloat. Then of course remind people that it was a mistake so it never happens again.

>>28928518
No worries.

>>28928544
Jokes on you, Anon. RGRE has already been and always will be this way. It's too popular and the Discord is too exclusive. Love and Powerlifting will still write and so will we, but more often than before. RGRE has already turned to shit long before it became so popular, so when it becomes a bump hell like it used to be--which, by the way, is highly unlikely--nothing of value will be lost. The theme's still very attractive, with all the wish-fulfillment and power fantasies it can spawn. RGRE has always been driving writers away.

>>28928578
I suppose, we do attract the most idiotic of people to this thread. Goes with the territory of being the biggest thread on the board I guess.

>>28927442
This is sickeningly adorable.

You did the daughters well, they're fun AND cute.

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>>28927442
You did Pinkie really well too. She's not overbearingly annoying or 4th wall breaking, this is good. Very good.

>>28928492
>>28928545

put your email in your pastebin and you'll get an invite!

>>28928622
>invite
I don't know about that.
last time i did that. i got invited by 34 writer from fimfiction. include my little dashie's author.

>>28928622
It's there

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As a resident image-fag i am seriously concerned about the discord's effect, but as long as the green flows my concern is irrelevant

I basically operate as if the last time someone posts they immediately keel over

So this is still a work in progress but here's the next part of the Anon in the wasteland thing.
---
>Your leg might be broken.
>Along with your arm.
>And your coccyx.
>Landing on a pile of rubble after jumping from the second story of a building might have been in retrospect a bad idea.
>But you were alive and limping towards the white house.
>You had to get away from these horses.
>Their talking led to only one logical conclusion after all.
>They were after you.
>The furfags weren’t satisfied with only destroying humanity.
>They wanted your ass gone.
>Being an average human was probably a slight against their degenerate ways.
>Two of them had horns, probably to do the stabbing.
>”I think he went this way.”
>Fuck
>You needed to hurry.
>If you could get back to the safety of your makeshift home you might get through this.
>Ignoring the throbbing pain in your leg you increased your pace.
>Soon enough the broken fence which lead to the south lawn came into view.
>You couldn’t slow down now, they were probably hot on your trail.
>Squeezing through the gap in the fence you stopped.
>Just on the other side was mister viper.
“Uh hi.”
>The snake continued to watch.
>Whether it acknowledged your greeting or not was a mystery.
>Eyes locked on you, it waited.

>>28928802
“I’m going to be straight with you here, there’s a bunch of crazy horses after me. So you got two options here.”
>Casting a nervous glance behind you, you continued.
“One you can bite me and we’ll call it a day or you can do me a favor and try to stall them for me. I promise I won’t kick you off the bed tonight if you do.”
>The snake nodded.
>IT FUCKING NODDED!
>This must have been hell.
>Talking horses, a world destroyed by furries, and critters that understood you.
>Giving the serpent a salute you continued on.
“Godspeed my friend.”

>”I’m sure he went this way.”
>That poor colt must be completely distraught.
>He must have hurt himself from that fall.
>”Fluttershy come on, we’re going to lose his trail if you don’t hurry.”
“Sorry.”
>Following closely behind your friends you followed the path the colt must have taken.
>The solitary conditions must have taken its toll on his poor head.
>Colts were easily confused as it was but to add not having anyone to talk to must have been torture.
>You had to find him fast.
>”Flutteryshy can you come here for a second.”
>You really need to stop spacing out like that.
>Your friends stopped just short of a broken fence.
>Passing by their still forms you came to face with
>Oh an animal friend, maybe they can help.

>>28928805
>”Hisssss”
>Oh dear.
“Girls I don’t think”
>”Just tell him to move shy.”
“Miss Viper says that she isn’t going to let us pass.”
>”What? Why not?”
“She said something about protecting her husbando.”
>”We don’t have time for this Fluttershy.”
>Rainbow despite your warning attempted to pass by the visibly coiled viper.
>You told her many times before about how touchy snakes can be.
>”AAAAHhhh she almost bit me!”
“Maybe we should find another way through.”
>The girls nodded in unison.
>Rainbow looked like she wanted another go at the snake but quickly rethought that idea when the viper flashed it’s fangs.

“Jeff you god damn horny bastard.”
>You found Jeff in the closet with two mops.
“I swear to god you’re going to need to get tested. Do you have any idea what kind of shit they’ve had to clean up?”
>Picking up your formidable friend you made your way to the foyer.
>Hopefully your snake ally would scare those horses off.
>But even if he failed, now they would have to face your combined power.
>Holding Jeff up you banged your chest.
“Come and get some you degenerate fuckers!”
>Pain completely forgotten you readied yourself.

>>28928809
>Off in the distance you heard screaming and yelling.
>Give ‘em hell snake friend, give ‘em hell.
>The yelling stopped.
>All was quiet save for the wind blowing through the cracks and crannies in the dilapidated building.
>This was it.
>Your last stand.
>No
>Humanities last stand.
>The still silence was eventually broken by the patter of hooves on marble.
>Six figures emerged from the ruble which lined the entry way to the white house.
>The multicolored horses looked cautious and alert.
>Taking a deep breath you gripped Jeff tightly.

>Many Equestrian historians tried to piece together the events that transpired within the House of White.
>Princess Sparkle despite being a meticulous note taker avoided making any concrete information available.
>Thankfully through careful research and second hand accounts from the other parties present they were able to piece some of it together.
>The following is a dramatization which has been adapted for your viewing.

>”I’m mutherfucking King Kong!”
>Ducking behind an upended table you could tried get a grip on the situation.
>Ears still ringing you looked around.
>Applejack was clutching her flank, she was the first to attempt to disarm the frenzied colt.
>In her hurry she didn’t expect him to retaliate so fiercely.

>>28928816
>You watched in horror as the broom he was holding came down and gave her a nice hit on the backside.
>Rainbow Dash was still flying around him zig-zagging in an effort to avoid getting hit.
>Fluttershy was hanging onto to Pinkie like her life depended on it.
>The isolation must’ve really gotten to this colt.
>”Twilight darling, we need to get this colt under control.”
::SMACK!::
>Taking a peek you saw Rainbow now floating high up rubbing her rump.
>”Can’t you just use your magic to get him to calm down?”
“I can’t use magic to overpower a colt.”
>”I guess I have no choice then.”
“Rarity what’re you going to do?”

>The blue one was out of reach.
>You managed to whack her on the butt once or twice.
>Your attention however turned towards the white horse that emerged from behind the desk.
>It confidently strode up and stopped right in front of you.
>Just out of reach of your broom you might add.
>”Now darling don’t you think this has gotten out of hoof. Why don’t you just set that broom down so we can have a little” she batted her eyes “chat.”
>Oh fuck no!
>You were not going down like this.
>These horses didn’t want to just do you in.
>They wanted to corrupt you in the worst way imaginable.
---
I'm going to probably edit this a bit more. Psatebins is here: http://pastebin.com/whA8Xhix for those interested

>>28928822
you fucking great motherfucker.
also, please tell me their is going to be a star wars sandpeople honk with the broom next.

>>28928822
what is even going on

>>28928802
IT STILL LIVES, HAIL THE MIGHTY DOOMSDAY WEAPON JEFF, HAIL!

>>28928946
>Anon is in the future earth
>Furries took over and humans mixed their DNA with animal DNA
>This caused humans to eventually lose their humanity and become straight up animals after generations
>Humans eventually forgot everything that led to them becoming animals
>Anon went through portal and ended up in this future
>Minuscule equines are attempted to help a "crazed lonely colt"
>Anon is trying to fight off the furry horde that, he believes, is trying to make him a furfag

>>28928978
what

>>28926597
>Luna is then told the story of a people without magic

>Who had looked up at the moon and stars for millenia
>And wanted to go there
>To see what it was like
>To look down on the earth from high above
>To see whether the moon really was made of cheese or not.

>A people who loved the moon so much that they devoted themselves to reaching it
>Somehow
>Someway
>No matter what the cost.

>And despite their lack of magic, find a way they did.
(or perhaps, Technology is a kind of magic after all)
>They rose up on wings of fire and steel
>And three men journeyed to the moon for the first time
>And two of them got to set foot upon the surface
>And see the Moon, in all its desolate glory.

>Luna wasn't prepared for all these feels

>>28928686
Heli, BNW sent you the invite. Feel free to accept the invite whenever.

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>>28928986
Not rgre but I fuckin dig it.

>>28928994
Just checked and haven't received it, I put the discord tag # in the pastebin as well just in case.

>>28929053
Strange. Have you checked your spam or other folders? If not, he must have sent it wrong. I'll see if I could send it to you. My email is [email protected].

>>28929075
Got it, thanks.

>>28926212
FAK OFF! Ye speak LIES and SLANDER! Listen writefriends. Old or new, we need you to come back! We need to show the propeller that it has no power! That we ar never dead! Only missing in greentext!

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>>28928986
>Luna's face

>>28926711
“So you’re a succubus?”
>”Succupony.”
“And you’re here because?”
>”Let me give you a clue hot-stuff.”
>Turning to the side, the mare gave you a nice glance at her cutie mark.
>A very suggestive cutie mark.
“All right then.”
>The now grinning demoness licked her lips.
>”I’m here because somepony is pretty pent up. I could sense it all the way in tartarus.”
“Uh-huh.”
>Walking to the kitchen sink you filled up a glass with water before making a sign of the cross over it.
>”And what kind of sex demon would I be to pass up a feast like th… eeee it’s cold it’s cold! Stop that!”
>Flinging another handful of water you continued the ice cold attack.
“The power of Christ compels you!”
>”Stop I’ll catch a cold!”
“Foul demons begone!”
>Long story short the succupony did catch a cold.
>And you got stuck with nursing her back to health.
>Turned out she’s a really nice mare, you know, someone you could bring home to mom.
>Except for the whole milk your dick dry to sustain her life-force thing.

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>>28928238 #
"Ahahaha, i was plannin' on jackin' it. But now that you're here."
>You slap Princess Celestia's ass through he cop uniform.
"I guess i got a helper."
>You say as the princess recoils from the slap.
>"W-Well okay, that um, check ou-" The now blushing princess stops talking when you wrap your arm around the back of her neck and navigate her towards your house.
"Nuff ah that talk. Oh, and do you like pearl necklaces?"
>She looks at you confused for a bit.
>"What does a pearl necklace have to do with rutting?" She ask causing you to smile.
"You'll know soon enough."
>Tfw.

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>>28929137
>>28929146
Good job.

>>28929185
Shit... He noticed the fuck up post!

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>>28929185
see image
>>28929139
Not enough succupony in these threads
>>28929146
Not enough anon being sexually dominant sadly enough. We need some good stories about anon grabbing mares by the pussy.

>>28928822
FIGHT ON! FIGHT TO THE DEATH!

>>28929198
you mean this one?>>28929137

>>28929225
T-That post doesn't exist! I- i mean! HE, never posted it... please don't sacrifice me to the propeller...

>>28929237
You don't understand the severity of the situation then, or the significance. We don't willingly give the propeller sacrifices, mistakes are what attracts it, QUICK YOU MUST WRITE A QUICK GR...ARGGGGGG!

>>28928986
This'd be appreciated over here: >>28903402

>>28928461
>None of my friends want to hang out with me and it isn't my fault.

>>28928544
Okay.

>>28928613
>"Hey, Anon? Guess where I just put these candies."

>>28928986
>"There was Buzz Aldrin.... Neil Armstrong... and the other one."

>>28929636
No one ever remembers Michael Collins.

>>28929743
Who?
G-Get it?

>>28929743
He has the misfortune of not having a cool name.

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>>28929743
Who could forget? He was a key figure in the Irish war of independence, and still holds an important place in the hearts of Irishmen today.

>>28927442
>You are Celestia.
>Still trying to protect your pride against your sister's inquisition about Anonymous.
>"Verily I can understand a bard of merit moving the hearts of ponies, but how doth thou justify calling him a villain?"
"You don't understand Luna, the melody was hypnotic. The chaos it left in its wake left many families broken as debauchery and crime ran rampant.
>"Ah, so he ist a tempter of sorts then?"
"Well, kinda? He played a multitude of songs and yes the one about girls, rocks, and boys did leave ponies with urges they couldnt control he also one time played a song about breaking the law.
>"Thou hast lost me again sister, what is seducing about rocks?"
>You let out an exasperated sigh as you shake your head.
"Not literal rocks, it's- You know what? you had to be there to know."
>You cross your hooves in front of you and frown at your sister being at a loss of words.
>Luna considers this for a moment before nodding at you.
>"Very well sister, I shall have to see it for mine self."
>Luna stood from where she was sitting and made for the door.
>Oh no...
"Luna, he doesn't play anymore. Trust me, I have kept an eye on him."
>This stops your sister and she gives you a scrutinizing look, one of many she has given you tonight.
>A look of understanding then dawns on her.
>"Thou art under his spell!"
>Horse apples.
"N-now Luna, I have no idea what you ar-"
>"Thou hast seen him play, and thou hast fallen for him sister!"
>Your shame has covered you like a blanket, tuck me in, let me die.
>"Have no fear sister, I shall tarry not tonight."
"Luna... What are you doing?"
>You ask with your ears back and your shoulders slumped.
>"I am going to confront him, no foul tempter makes a mockery of us. We art mares among mares! Not some shy stallions!"
>With this proud exclamation your sister bounds out of your room leaving you alone.
"Great, now I get to deal with this..."
>You slump into your bed, ready to call it a night.

>>28930385
"She is so not ready for what she has gotten herself into."

>Thou art Luna.
>Final vestige of mareliness on Equestria.
>Thine sister hath betrayed her origins to fawn over some colt.
>Shameful.
>Thou shall show her, thou shall show them all what it means to be a mare.
>Casting the spell and entering the dreamscape, it doesn't take long to find Ponyville.
>Searching through the many dreams you finally stumble upon a house emiting an odd amount of energy.
>There, under three almost childish whisps of dreams, was one so powerful it was tangible here in the dreamscape.
>If thou touched it thou would enter like normal, but thou would have to battle for control of the dream.
>Whomever this dream belonged to had amazing mental constitution.
"Very well, we shall do this the hard way colt..."
>Thou spit into one of your forhooves before rubbing them together and diving head first into the dream.
>Thou art immediately in a smokey dim lit room, filled with beings that looked almost identical to the one known as Anonymous.
>Looking around you notice thineself upon the edge of a stage,
>As spotlights hit the stage, illuminating Anonymous in a leather jacket and leather pants music starts to play and the crowd starts cheering.
>"Last night a little dancer came dancin' to my door"
>"Last night a little angel Came pumpin cross my floor"
>Thou fight back, but thine body betrays you, as thou dance onto the stage towards him.

>>28930390
>"She said "Come on baby I got a licence for love""
>""And if it expires pray help from above""
"N-now see here c-"
>Not giving thou a chance to actually answer the song continues as he approaches.
>He runs a hand through thine mane and look deep in thine eyes as he sings on.
>"In the midnight hour she cried- "more, more, more""
>Thine eyes widen you gape at the implication.
>"With a rebel yell she cried- "more, more, more""
>"In the midniight hour babe- "more, more, more""
>Feeling control slipping ever further from thine control, thou does what is required.
>Thou fled.
>Tail between thine leg to hide thy shame.
>Thou awake with a start, bedsheets soaked.
>Poking a hoof into thine sheets to confirm what you feared.
>T'was not sweat.
>Making a beeline for elder sister's room, not even bothering to knock thou enter her chambers.
"I have failed..."
>Celestia looks at her clock with groggy eyes.
>"Luna it hasn't even been ten minutes since you left..."
>Shame is all there is, nothing more.

That is probably all I will have until tonight, hope you all enjoy.

>>28930395

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BPwZaQfoIbU

>>28930395
Wait... is this Billy Idol in Equestria?
I like it.
I've never heard of Billy Idol

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>>28929139

>>28927888
>>28928073
>>28928238
>Police pone keeps shouting pickup lines at Anon every day he passes by on his way to work
>One day he gets an idea
>Sauntering up to the cop, he gives her a very sexual smile
"Ma'am, for multiple accounts of sexual harassment, I'm placing you under citizen's arrest."
>He snaps one end of a hoofcuff on her
>"Oooh, kinky."
>And the other to a light pole
"Not to mention obstruction of justice, disturbing the peace, defamation of my character, unlawful stop and frisk, littering -and yes, I have seen you drop your gum wrappers wherever you stand, you tiny degenerate- and wearing your sunglasses at night which is at least a misdemeanor in douchebaggery."
>He then walks off
>"N-No wait! Don't leave me here! I- I'm gonna miss my soaps!"

Penis power, am I right, fellas?

>>28930935
>you tiny degenerate
I laughed.

>>28930935
I dunno if you're allowed to restrain someone in a citizen's arrest, or if cops are even eligible for it.

>>28930943
You can try, but it might end with you getting fucked up, there's procedure for it, otherwise it's kidnapping and either way there's a good chance to police will blacklist you.

>>28930943
Officers are not exempt and restraint depends on the circumstance.

In the case of an unlawful stop and frisk which was being used as an excuse to sexually harass, both are within reason but you'd need eye-witness testimony or even video/photo evidence, otherwise it would be your word against the officer's who might not have a recorded history of abuse with which to apply reasonable doubt.

Any greens about the Spa Twins trying to either give him special messages, or trying to hire him to bring in more customers?

>>28930972
>>28930943
One of the requirements, I think, is that you need to call the police right after you restrain them, I think. If you perform a citizens arrest and then let them go it was technically kidnapping.

I think.

how would RGRE ponys react to anon drinking milk as an adult? We are the only creatures that I can think of that drink any kind of milk after infancy.
Would they think he is the ultimate mama's boy? (Equivalent to the ultimate case of Dady issues)

>>28931903
The problem is, ponies have a near-human society, and already keep herds of cows around. Chances are good that milk drinking is normal.

>>28931996
Well for the sake of a story what if it wasn't.
How would they react?

>>28932026
They might find it cute.
>"Aw, the little colt needs his calcium!"
They might find it weird.
>"Uh, aren't you, like 25?"
They might find it hot.
>"You want some straight from the source, little boy?"

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Do you see this tiny horse here?
This horse belongs to me now.

No. It doesn't have a choice, and you don't have a say in the matter.

>>28932159
Amazon Anon catching Rainbow Dash as a wife when?

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>>28932197
>Rainbow Dash
Why stop there?

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>>28932222
Quads have spoken.

>>28931996
the actual problem is a main character in a cannon episode drinks chocolate milk

also baking

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>>28932116
>>"You want some straight from the source, little boy?"
Yes, p-please?

>>28932346
>actual cows hitting on anon after they find out he loves milk
That would be fun but if it happened to me I wouldn't be able to drink mile without getting a bit creeped out

>>28932605
>gigga cow nigga lactates chocolate milk
>every night Twilight goes cow-tipping

>>28932687
So is cow tipping in this context twilight fucking the nigger cow or linching the nigger cow?

>>28932765

Lynching of course.

Can't trust ziggers or ciggers around our stallions.

>>28932901
>ciggers
You mean those Moohammed worshiping cow(l)heads?

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>>28932605
>>28932687
>>28932346

>>28932967
why would he a cow when he has pony?

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>>28932974
Cause they don't produce milk unless they're pregnant.

>>28932974
Some days the what ifs come at you strong, and our anon here is not of the toughest will.

>>28932974
That Minnesota accent REALLY turns his crank.

>>28930395
>You are Anonymous.
>You crack your eyes open as the sound of your alarm wakes you.
>Flailing your arm at the bedside table you manage to quell the shrieking beast upon your third attempt.
>You inhale deeply as you get up and out of bed, stretching as your limbs pop.
>Dragging your feet you make your way to the kitchen and start a pot of coffee before starting the morning routine of waking your daughters up.
>Specs was the first, because you would also have to get to her again after you woke the others up.
"Specs wake up."
>You gently nudge your canine daughter who whimpers and bats at your hand as she rolls around under her sheets.
"Yeah yeah, five more minutes."
>Next you work your way to Coggy's room.
>You carefully stick your head into the room, and look around before entering.
>She was in the middle of what you assumed was a sort of dragon puberty, and there were some mornings she was snoring fire.
>As a result you had to make sure her room was made of stone bricks, entire thing was basically a big oven some mornings.
"Sweet heart? Are you awake?"
>You are answered with a yawn and a groggy smile.
>"Morning dad..."
>Your draconic daughter walks over from her pile of shiny metals and gems she had collected over the years.
>Apparently a hoard was a healthy part of any dragon's life, so long as she kept away from the silverware you didn't care that much.
>You kneel down and accept Coggy's good morning hug before taking her by the hand and leading her to the kitchen.
>With a big yawn of fire, she started the wood stove so you could make breakfast for the girls.
"Den, you awake?"
>You call after your middle daughter who was usually awake before you, which you assumed was a bird thing.
>The avian girl strides out of her room, stretching her wings and arching her back as she joins her little sister at the dinner table.
>You crack open a few eggs into a frying pan and put it over the stove before depositing hashbrowns in as well.

>>28933259
>As they sizzle you call after your canine daughter.
"Specs, you are going to miss breakfast if you don't wake up."
>This elicits a groan of effort as your largest daughter finally makes her appearance.
>Instead of joining her sisters at the table she makes her way over to you and flops on the ground at your feet belly up.
"How are you still so sleepy? I swear if this is another growth spurt you are going to be bigger than me..."
>You shake your head and try to move back to the frying pan only to have someone latch onto your leg.
>You try to pull free a couple of times before sighing and dragging her over to where you could reach to continue cooking.
"Alright, who wants the first plate?"
>Your eldest daughter slaps a hand against your thigh and groans into your leg.
"Very well, I kinda figured..."
>You hand your plate down to her and she finally stands up and makes her way to the table, content with her meal in hand.
"Oh come on, when was the last time you brushed yourself young lady?"
>Looking down at your pajama pants you notice dog hair all over your leg.
>The big girl shrinks under your glare as you put your hands on your hips.
"After breakfast I am going to brush you, since you apparently can't do it yourself.
>Shaking your head you turn back to the pan to start the next round of breakfast.
>It doesnt take long before food for everyone is ready, and you all sit down together to eat.
>You hand over Specs her second plate you made after your own and dig into your own meal.
"So girls, make any new friends yet?"
>Silence answers you as your daughters awkwardly eat their food.
"Eh, can't blame a guy for hoping."
>You shrug as you fork another mouthful of egg into your waiting maw.
>"Hey dad, would it be okay if Specs and I went to the gem quarry today?"
>Your draconic daughter asked with a hopeful expression.

>>28933265
>You hum to yourself in thought before shrugging and nodding in approval.
"You not tagging along Den?"
>Unidentified shakes her head as she swallows her mouthful of food.
>"Actually dad I was going to go fishing today."
>You preferred when your daughters used the buddy system, but Den was smart enough to know her boundaries.
"If you promise to be careful I guess it's alright. You know I prefer you not being alone out there."
>"I know dad."
>You glance at the clock and sigh as you get up from the table.
"Well girl's I need to get ready for work soon. Den, can you clean the dishes for me? I need to brush your sister."
>Your canine daughter tries to make a run for it but you knew it was coming and have already tackled her to the ground and pulled the dog brush out of your pocket.
>"No! It feels wierd!"
"You are shedding everywhere!"
>She may give you a run for your money but as of now you are still bigger and manage to awkwardly brush her legs and tail.
>She fought, but the way her tail was wagging you swore this was her attempt at getting more attention from you.
>You finally stand triumphantly before tossing the brush next to her.
"Alright, you finish the rest. I need to go change."
>In minutes you are changed and on your way out the door.
"Try to make some friends today won't you girls?"
>You head out and close the door behind you before they can give you any sass.

This is all I have for now. Don't expect much more until Turkey Day is over and done with, enjoy!

>>28932989
> pregnant
> producing milk

Who the fuck are they producing milk for if they're still pregnant? Milk comes at the very end.

>>28933251
Moo-nnesota

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>>28933300
Alright, you got me!

Anon just has a pregnancy fetish, ok?!

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Princess of "Love"

>>28933271
Thank you

>>28933271
>tackling your half canine daughter as she fights and struggles to get free of imminent brushing is so common an occurrence no one bats an eye
That's both hilarious and adorable.

>>28933271
My heart.

>>28933351
>a is a triangle
>hormon-triangle
>hormona

???

>>28933679
seriously?
hormonal

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What happened to that story where Earth Anon is on RGRE CHS because he tries to get a job but he can't because he doesn't have a highschool diploma because he doesn't exist in this reality so he gets enrolled as an adult into an all-girls high school filled with hormonal teenagers?

>>28933756
I don't think it was started, it was an idea that floated around and LaP is the only one to really do any EqG stuff. I would like more though.

>>28933778
Just because you want to see they body's color.

>>28933271
You've been really diligent, so thanks on behalf of the thread for the content first off.

Wanted to give some feedback.

The concept is pretty nice mix that surprised me. Dad-Anon is something that can give mixed results, but so far it's been cute. I was really excited when you threw in 'reformed villain' on top. That has so much potential in my mind and a big part of me wishes I thought of using it for a green. In this particular case, I felt slightly underwhelmed though. Anon just seems to play music and the ponies don't understand it, and they get aroused and rebellious in some cases as far as I can tell, mistaking it for enchantment. That's not a BAD plot device but I feel like you missed an opportunity there to bring in a plot device that could interact more with the daughters and mane 6. He COULD play a show and drive mares crazy in ponyville, but... eh... I feel like you could do better.

I agree with the anon that appreciated your pinky. She's usually written as a hyper obnoxious character, but here you play her more clever and genuinely comedic. Good job with her.

One of the things I wanted to mention was that there was a terrible name issue with the daughters, that you seem to have discovered and patched already. Basically calling them all variations of Anon makes it hard to keep track of them and gives them no personality almost. Their names even started with the same prefix sounds. I would have suggested doing what satyrs seems to do and name them more like a character from the show, but you took pieces from all their names and this so far makes them all feel unique. Problem solved honestly, so nothing to do there.

Keep it up.

What are some good stories, preferably where everything with a vagina isn't after Anon?
Basically looking for something light on the lewd, or just no lewd at all, though romance is fine..

>>28934204
That will be.... Sombra.
>What about discord?
S/He can be anything s/he want.

>though romance is fine
Go kill yourself. go back to /hhh/

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Story with Anon hanging with Discord and taking advantage of the reversed gender roles to hilarious effect when.

>>28934204
Off the top of my head, this fits your criteria:
http://pastebin.com/vRwCyW1x

>>28934271
Eris... yes... she got a chaos pussy.

>>28934204
Cow tipping is good, there are just 3 characters that want anon, the rest just like him as a friend

>>28934271
Goddamit Discord act like gay or something because it like fuck pussy with ball stuck on top of it.
I swear i didn't write story about it... maybe

>>28934271
>The world was not ready
>Equestria could not handle the sheer magnitude of stallionish whimsy that these two titans sowed wherever they traveled.

>>28934360
It's It's a sea aenemone.

>>28934341
That easy great.

>>28934271
>Day One in Anonquestria
>Be Discord.
>One of the locals approaches you in curiosity.
>"Who the fuck are you?"
"I'm Discord"
>More of the locals crowd around you.
>"Someone else?"
>"It's been so long."
>"You're our new waifu."
>The large crowd that has gathered around you looks at you in a way that makes you very uncomfortable.
"Oh dear."
>"You'll be calling us that a lot, sweetie."
>One of them straps a set of false breasts onto your chest.
>"No Anon, get that gay shit off of him."
>They dejectedly remove the fake boobs.
>"Now who's going first?"
>"Use the wheel!"
>"Wheel!"
>"Wheel!"
>"Wheel!"
>The locals of wherever you are are all chanting and a large raffle wheel is brought out.
>Each of them takes a ticket and one of them spins the large colourful wheel.
>It lands on "Bumrush them".
>Which is exactly what they do.
>They all charge at you and try to violate your bottom in a very sexual manner.
>It's not very effective, since when one manages to start their violation the ones next to them haul them off of you so they can begin themselves.
>You end up getting more battered and trampled than violated.
>This stops when a huge white Anon lands gracefully nearby.
>"My little Anons, please stop." says the huge white Anon.
>The regular sized Anons do as they are asked, and the larger one resumes his speech.
>"I want some of dat ass."
>The crowd parts to let the big guy approach you.
>"But the wheel" interjects one of the Anons.
>"Fuck the wheel, I'm the biggest so I'm the boss!"
>"Fucking Anonlesita."
>"You can do what the wheel says once I'm done splitting this guy here in two."
>Anonlestia unzips his pants and you know you're going to have a bad time.
>rape

>>28934691
Stay classic. also

KKKKKKKKKKKKKKEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEK

>>28934691
>>"I'm the biggest so I'm the boss!"
The Anon's have obviously embraced their orky green-ness

Alright, give me few - 12 hours to done a fucking... BANG Cow or some shit.

If i didn't not done. that mean, i'm piss.

>>28934729
That mean, Write Clop
>Greentext story

>>28921694
Ya know, I didn't expect much of this right off the bat, but I'm really likin' it.

>>28932974
>Not keeping a large, multi-species harem.
>Not endeavoring to fuck and possibly impregnate a girl or twelve of every race.

http://pastebin.com/u/AsianAnonymous

I have to sleep now. maybe next time. no cow today.

Make those discord is a bad mistake.

>>28934989
YOU'RE THE LAST ONE WHO DIDN'T NOT JOIN!
YOU BETTER NOT JOIN THEY FUCKING DISCORD.
They will be lazy as hell!
You promise us a cow story

>>28935084
>>28935096
Everyone is just really tired, Anon. We're humans too. It's just so hard to write something that isn't slop. And no, not every writefag is in the Discord.

>>28935096
You need to work on your grammar.
You probably meant:
Making that Discord was a bad mistake.

>>28935084
You also need to work on your grammar.
You probably meant:
You're the last one who didn't join!
You'd better not join the fucking Discord.
They will be lazy as hell.
You promised us a cow story.

>>28934729
I can't figure out what you're trying to say.
I do not understand what "BANG Cow" means
The grammar in your post also needs improvement.
I optimistically look forward to reading your work.

>>28934728
>>28934714
I'm glad you liked it.
>Princess Luna is a large black Anon who comes out in the night.
>"Once you go black you don't get a chance to go back."
>Legends tell that if you walk past an alleyway exactly at midnight, NiggerNon Luna will appear.

>>28935194
We're very busy conspiring against you, give us some time to get things put together.

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>>28935216
>grammar
>grammar
>grammar
Life is hard.

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Alright, hold onto your butts boys. This is gonna be a long 'un

>>28935422

“…You alright there, Twi?”

>Anon, who was sitting on a plain yet comfortable wooden chair, couldn’t help but eye Twilight in concern. The alicorn was ignoring him, focusing all of her efforts on the small vial and needle in her hooves.

>Twilight had been trying for the last ten minutes to pierce the thin metal tin covering the lid with little success. Usually, she’d have done such a delicate task with her magic or at least her wings, but, because of her peeping, and because she hadn’t been able to get out of the room quick enough when Anonymous and Celestia had caught her peeping, she was not only unable to use her magic but her wings as well

>A heavy duty magic inhibitor had been placed around her horn, and a specialized rope had been wrapped around her barrel to keep her from spreading her wings.

>Neither inhibitor nor rope hurt the purple alicorn in any way. They had been placed on gently, but firmly; not a feather out of place. But for Twilight, a mare who had used magic for practically everything since she could walk, having only her hooves to work with was a punishment unlike any that she had ever received. As was the point.

>Twilight was under “parole”. No matter how much she complained or begged her bindings would [i]stay[/i] where they were until she learned to respect people’s privacy and not poke her nose into things that she [i]shouldn’t[/i].

>That being said, as he sat there watching her struggle, Anon couldn’t help but think that maybe they should let her break her parole for a little while. If not for her sake then for his.

>“Oh horse apples… Will you stop… get in there…”

>Twilight had the vial between her hooves and the syringe awkwardly positioned in her mouth. Each movement that she made was jerky, unsure. Each scrape along the vial’s cap and each time the needle [i]just[/i] missed burying itself into her foreleg made the human flinch.

>>28935427

>He could feel himself growing more and more anxious. He was already a little nervous today—what with they were going to be doing—but sitting there watching this was slowly but surely driving him over the edge.

>With a yelp—that nearly sent both him and his frayed nerves to the ceiling—Twilight dropped the vial and hugged a foreleg to her chest.

>“Owowowowo!” she cried, still somehow holding the syringe. “I jabbed myself! Motherbucker!”

>This was the straw that broke the camel’s back for the young man.

“Twilight! Please, you’re killing me!” Anon said, covering his face with his hands. “Just… just bring that over here and let me do it!”

>Twilight, wiggling the hoof that she had accidently stabbed, looked over at him. “What?” she asked.

>Anon’s eye twitched when he saw a bead of drool working its way down the body of the syringe.

“Pick up that little jar and bring it over here with a needle—not the one in your mouth! You stabbed yourself with that one, you crazy purple horse! Get me another one! A [i]clean[/i] one! One that doesn’t have your spit all over it, for God’s sake!”

>With some bumbling, Twilight eventually managed to do as he asked, picking up the vial and getting him a new syringe. [i]Where[/i] she had gotten either of the syringes that she had on the table was a mystery. Where she had gotten the drug was also an enigma. But he had no desire to know where she had gotten any of these things. He had a feeling that the answer would make him more anxious than he already was.

>“Remember to be careful. Those needles are sharp and you really don’t want to stab yourself with one.”

“I know.”

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>>28935432

>“You won’t need much. By my calculations, you shouldn’t need more than twenty cc’s.”

“I got it.”

>“Make sure that you’re measuring carefully. Since it’s a liquid it’ll dip down a bit in the mid—”

>Anon jumped when he felt the purple princess’s breath wash over the back of his neck. Looking over his shoulder, he saw that she had propped herself against the back of his chair. She was staring at the vial in his hands intently, her mouth slightly parted.

His eye twitched again. “Twilight, if you don’t stop breathing down my neck I’m going to stab you with this thing. I swear to almighty God I will stab you.”

>Twilight, her ears folding against her skull, quickly pushed herself away from the chair. “Oops, sorry,” she said with a sheepish chuckle. “I’m just making sure that you’re doing this right. I wouldn’t want you hurting yourself.”

“Just be quiet for a second,” Anon grunted, lining up the tip of the syringe against the metal cap. “Let me get the stupid needle in this thing before you go distracting me.”

>There was a surprising amount of resistance as he punctured the top of the vial. He pushed the needle deep into the liquid, eyeing it curiously, before he began to pulled back on the pump.

“So what is this stuff again?” he asked, focusing his attention on the measurement ticks. “Celestia tried to explain it to me before she went off to lord knows where, but she forgot that I don’t have a doctor’s vocabulary.”

>“It’s a chemical cocktail that’ll active your thyroid and hypothalamus by using a special chromosome that—”

“English, Twi.”

>>28935437

>Twilight’s mouth snapped shut. Her brow furrowed, and she looked at the vial thoughtfully. Collecting her thoughts for a few moments, she opened her mouth and tried again.

>“What’s in that vial is going to help you secrete far more sperm than you usually do,” she told him.

“Automatically?”

>Twilight shook her head, her tail flicking. “No, it’ll take a couple of minutes.”

Anon frowned. “A couple of minutes? That still seems pretty fast for something like this,” he mumbled, looking at her from the corner of his eye. “Is there some kind of magic in this that speeds up the process or whatever?”

>Once again, the bookworm shook her head. “There’s no magic of any kind in the drug at all,” she assured.

While he kind of doubted that—what with almost [i]everything[/i] in this world being magical in some way or another—he held his tongue. “How does it work then?” he asked instead.

>Twilight smirked. “I’d explain it, but you wanted me to dumb it down so…”

“Hey, no one likes a smart ass,” Anon chided, sticking his tongue out at her as he drew the proper amount of liquid from the vial.

>“I’m just doing what you asked,” Twilight smartly replied, smirking. “Now, lift the tip to the ceiling and squirt a bit of the liquid out. We need to get the air out of there so we don’t shoot any into your veins.”

“I’m guessing that that would be a bad thing, huh?” the human questioned, making a face as he lifted the needle up so that the tip was pointing to the ceiling.

>>28935444

>Twilight nodded. “Yes, it would be very bad. Very, very bad.”

>Nodding, he flicked the needle before pushing on the end of the pump. A small spurt of liquid flew out from the tip and onto the floor below. A small bead of the drug began to slide down that thin, sharp tube of metal. Anon watched is as it made its way down to the glass body, a scowl on his face.

He looked over at his purple friend. “You know that I don’t like needles, right?” he questioned.

>“I recall you telling me that many times,” Twilight answered diplomatically.

“But we’re still going to stick me with one?”

>“We need to do all that we can to improve the chances of your seed taking,” the princess explained, walking around so that she was standing next to him. “There’s a lot that we can’t do, since we don’t want to alter your seed through magical means, but we [i]can[/i] increase the amount you cum.”

“And that’s going to matter?”

>“To be frank, we have no idea,” she told him with a shrug. “But a normal stallion can produce over a fifty milliliters of semen during an ejaculation; far, [i]far[/i] more than you’re able to.” She shifted her weight, staring hard at the shot in his hands. “The princess and I don’t know if having you cum as much would help, but we both thought that it wouldn’t hurt anything.”

>While the prospect of being able to cum as much as a [i]horse[/i] was oddly appealing to the young man, Anon still couldn’t help but have a few reservations. More than a few actually.

“Do you even know what this stuff is going to do to me?” he queried, his grip on the syringe tightening.

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>>28935448

>“Nope,” Twilight admitted as he grabbed a cap and placed it over the needle. “We’ve never used anything like this on you before.”

“Has this been used on [i]anything[/i] before?” he asked.

>Twilight nodded. “Yep. The drug on your hands is primarily used in the breeding of pigs.”

“Pigs?” the human questioned, not looking all that happy with the purple princess’s admission.

>“Pigs share many biological traits with you,” she quickly clarified. “So the princess and I figured that it’d work.”

>Anon looked down at the syringe in his hand. He could have asked why on earth the two didn’t get some advice from a doctor of some kind, and probably [i]should[/i]. That would have been the smart thing to do, the right thing to do. For all he knew, this could make him grow another arm!

>But he didn’t.

>Twilight was one of the smartest mares that he knew, and Celestia might have been even smarter than her. Without a doubt, the two of them probably researched everything about this drug. He wouldn’t have been the least bit surprised if the two knew this drug, its side effects, and everything in between backwards and forwards.

Sighing, he carefully placed the needle onto the table in front of him and leaned back into his chair. “So you have no idea what this is gonna do to me and you have no idea if it’s even going to work?” he questioned.

>To both his amusement and horror, Twilight nodded. “We can only try our best and hope it works,” she said simply.

Setting the vial down, Anon picked up his chair and spun it around so that he was staring right at Twilight. “Fuck it. I’m already in too deep to back out now,” he grumbled.