/mtfg/ - cotton candy edition

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>>7267509
I have brown hair, brown counts as a colour.

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barron

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• kiwi discord: https://discord.gg/pNWQ2S7

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>>7267509
colored hair would be neat but people seem to appreciate my natural hair color so i dont wanna ruin it

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Today wasn't as bad as yesterday, but it wasn't great.

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my waifu

>>7267522
Barron "5'11" at ten years old" Trump

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I hope I can be cute someday.

>>7267496
Bexe is really sweet and pretty and has great boobs
>>7267513
I'll have to try that then

>>7267522
Barron Trump 2044

>>7267505
It's not just body/boobs I want, I guess. I would love face+voice+hair as well. Is TruTrans (tm) mostly genital dysphoria?

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repost bc last thread died

>go to Walmart in 100% boymode
>haven't shaved
>didn't comb hair
>wearing boyfriend's t-shirt and jacket
>jeans and kept hands in jacket pocket
>people stare and ask "is that a girl"

wtf my boymode is cis male tier idk what they were smoking pic is alpha male me

>>7267533
barron "8D underwater chess against the cyber" Trump

>>7267541
>Is TruTrans (tm) mostly genital dysphoria?
here it's that you have to be straight and get srs

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i want rainbow pastel hair but it'd also be blindingly gay

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Kiwi I didn't get that many (You)s.
Should I just go sit at the table in the corner?

>>7267543
Barron "my height isnt the only thing thats 11 inches" Trump

>>7267541
Trutrans is when you become an irl futa and creampie chaser's butts

@7267549
yes
>>7267496
sheen a cute uwu

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>>7267549
sry better luck next time

>>7267542
empty your trash and put the toilet paper on the roll you monster

>>7267542
>manspreading

I want to rub my dick on kit's face

>>7267564
Iktf

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>>7267542
>Korra enters the thread.

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>>7267558

>>7267549
sorry hi

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>tfw won't get to do study abroad again
>tfw I'll never be in a comfy french town on a cold winter morning, just walking through and taking in the scenery
>tfw no comfy train trips to another country for the weekend
rip
>>7267535
you will be
>>7267546
i've always wanted to dye my hair but I'd be such a tumblr tranny stereotype so I avoid doing it

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coloured hair best hair

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>>7267569

this thread just started why are all the unbearables showing up

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>>7267569
....

>>7267572
>tumblr tranny stereotype
I already have the hipster glasses shit going, I think if I dyed my hair I would be unable to escape from this.

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>>7267573
i agree

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>>7267576
deplorables you mean

>>7267576
favorite person in the whole world had to go to sleep so I'm sad and lonely now but I should be asleep and out of your hair pretty soon here

>>7267588
so did she like the cleaning surprise?

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>>7267569

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D E A D
E
A
D

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guess i can just post tons of these

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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uajIhwkZ0J8

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time to revive this shite

should I stay up an hour to get groceries or sleep ?
fallout 1 or 4 ?
cod or battlefield ?
civ or total war ?
spaghetti or fussilini ?
sugo or pesto ?
cheese : molten or in slices ?
romance or action ?
forest or city ?
bow or gun ?

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>>7267609
groovy

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>reassigned to another area of the store because injured arm
>start to miss interacting with people
What the fuck is wrong with meee

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>>7267602
mouth to mouth resuscitation

>>7267610
>groceries
>fallout 4
>battlefield
>civ
>fussilini
>pesto
>cheese : molten
>romance
>forest
>bow

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>>7267610
>fallout 1 or 4
Only played 4, can't say.
>cod or battlefield
Battlefield.
>civ or total war
ugh I can't pick.
>spaghetti or fussilini
Spaghetti.
>sugo or pesto
Dunno either.
>molten or in slices
Molten.
>Romance or Action
Depends really, both are just cheesy af nowadays.
>forest or city
City is fun with friends.
>bow or gun
Gun.

>>7267622
What happened to your arm?

>>7267614
yeah

To be or not to be...that is the question

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>>7267627
That's pretty gay.

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>>7267628
I pulled something at work today
Oversized reusable bags plus heavy groceries

>>7267610
Just popping in to note that room temperature cheese is worst cheese

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>>7267637
You must be weak af. I am too.

>>7267642
depends on cheese tho imo
>>7267628
>Only played 4, can't say.
1 is basically a isometric round based shooter
with wayyyy deeper rpg elements
so rly comes down to rpg-esque shooter or deep-level rpg

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>>7267637
Do you even lift bruh?

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hrm
i wonder if i should do my bangs straight down or like this
or if i should keep growing them out and part my hair differently

capitalism is agp

>>7267650
Thats exactly how you do you hair already minus the length.

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i am agp

aye, there's the rub,
For in that sleep of death, what dreams may come,
When we have shuffled off this mortal coil,

>>7267647
my roommate opens everything for me since i am too weak for it

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>>7267653
Well for that specific style I'd cut my bangs as opposed to having them so long and out of control right now
But the rest of my hair would keep growing

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>>7267651
-posted from something capitalism invented
>>7267650
messi straight down

>>7267654
uwu

>>7267610
I like shopping at late hours.
new vegas
neither
linguine
sugo
molten
action
forest
bow

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>>7267654
Same desu.

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>>7267648
Note that I barely played 4 and I just made Hitler and dicked around for a bit.

>>7267651
I'm AGP D:

>>7267656
I can open everything except the salsa bottle.

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>>7267610
>should I stay up an hour to get groceries or sleep ?
Stay up five hours to do nothing but jerk off and play games.
>fallout 1 or 4 ?
1
>cod or battlefield ?
Battlefield.
>civ or total war ?
Total War.
>spaghetti or fussilini ?
Fussilini.
>sugo or pesto ?
Pesto..
>cheese : molten or in slices ?
Molton.
>romance or action ?
Romance but only good ones like In the Mood for Love.
>forest or city ?
City.
>bow or gun ?
Gun.

Are there any ways to hide your junk that doesn't involve pushing your gonads up into your body?

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I wonder if I should get a pushup bra

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>>7267659

>>7267664
>jerk off
is shlicking allowed too ?

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>>7267663
opening salsa is the worst

>>7267669
Of course~

>>7267668
feel free to move to the uncivilized north and live the way you wanna live
free from capitalism

>>7267666
Wearing push up bras is a form of lying

>>7267633
Lesbian or straight, that's the way I like it. ;)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q3svW8PM_jc

>>7267656
I have a strap wrench in the kitchen. I'm finding I'm using it more and more.

>>7267666
can't hurt to have a few int the war chest.

Thus conscience does make cowards of us all

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>>7267647
I am, but these were still excessively heavy, they were like Costco sized bags full of cans and liquid.
Customers that give me bags that large are actually cunts

>>7267649
I have less testosterone than a cis women, my muscles are really weak.

>>7267666
You're not mega milkin it yet.

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>>7267674
lol
>>7267675
yeah that's true
>>7267679
i'm not and th at's why i'd want a push up right?
make use of what tit i do have

>>7267672
based

>>7267589
yes a lot

>>7267666
Push-up bras tend to hide wide set boobs. Would recommend, I wear nothing but push-ups.

>>7267673
>uncivilized north
what

>>7267678
>tfw afraid of being too weak
How do you get over this?

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>>7267683
Hide that they're wideset or hide them entirely?

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>>7267671
I tried to get my brother to open it, but he couldn't either. Luckily I found the already opened jar.
Also my parents said I needed to go to the gym after I couldn't lift the esky out of the car and had to get my mother to do it.

>>7267675
My sexuality is weird, I'm bi but sometimes the idea of sex grosses me out.

>>7267678
I guess working at a Super Market sucks eh?

>>7267685
iirc you can live in the north of canada without being part of state or something
only rules :
no crime
not able to use anything provided by the state of canada , e.g. healthcare

>>7267689
that they're wideset

if you have something to work with push-up bras pretty much make it look like you have perf tits

>>7267693
that only affects me though even if i wanted to do that

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>>7267695
Cool, guess I'll order a push up bra when my paycheck comes in.

>>7267648
Never had one that's better room temperature. Any examples?

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>>7267700
Get matching panties too.

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>>7267704
Push up panties?

>>7267698
well, you complain about a system most people like
if you don't wanna be a part of it there are options other than being a hypocritical trip on 4chin ^^
>>7267701
soft french / swiss cheese
cambert tastes pretty good at room temperature for example

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>>7267706
gotta show off that package yo

>>7267711
Those are the dumbest fucking things on the planet.

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oops I posted in the wrong thread lol
ANYWAYS
SOON MY HAIR WILL BE PIC RELATED
S O O N

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I had a weird dream once, a very very weird dream.
I was kidnapped for like 3-4 years but forcibly put on HRT; when I was finally released/rescued/whatever people just kinda accepted it since it "wasn't my choice" and weird stuff.
Thing is I'm really confused. Some days I'm totally ok being a dude, other times I feel like I want HRT ASAP. I really don't know what the fuck's happening. I sometimes wish that dream would actually happen.

>>7267690
It would suck less if customers thought about the people who actually have to handle their groceries. They don't though, today just had a particularly bad string of heavy lifts because people are too dumb to realise that some heavy items need to be left in their cart.

>>7267686
Idk, you can lift
I'm just excessively weak

>>7267700
This should be funny when a family comes into your store and the kid says mom why does that boy have balloons in his shirt?

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>>7267716
>I was kidnapped for like 3-4 years but forcibly put on HRT; when I was finally released/rescued/whatever people just kinda accepted it since it "wasn't my choice" and weird stuff.
That's something I relate to. I used to fantasize about it not being my choice. Not even in a force fem kind of way. It just relieved the mental stress because if I was wrong that I was trans then it wasn't my fault and it's just something that happened to me and I need to accept.
>>7267718
That's funny anon! Too bad I only wear comfy things to work because it's fucking work.

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>>7267717
What's your job at the store? I mean I don't think here people deal with heavy lifting at least at checkouts.

>>7267714
not if you wanna show all of your goods

>>7267719
That means you can save your fetish bras for home then.

>>7267716
Dysphoria tends to come in waves, it's pretty normal for you to not feel like you need to transition constantly, but if you feel that way a lot you definitely should.

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>>7267722
I'll bring them so I can AGP while I'm on break.

I need to stop spending so much time on the internet talking to cute tranny girls I don't think it's good for my brain

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>>7267720
I'm a cashier.
We're understaffed so I bag as well as ring people through.

So yeah, I have to do at least some heavier lifting.

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>>7267729
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sXr71Rmvcaw

RUN

>>7267729
That's probably a good idea. You should stop talking to people on /mtfg/ as well.

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>>7267733
Bagging can't be that hard unless you guys gotta lift the bags as well.

>>7267733
Can't they bag their own stuff or is it a store for disabled people?

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>>7267725
Not that Anon, but my current situation has been building for years. I have periodic bouts of dysmorphia that frequently outlets towards dysphoria. I've also had a sort of shattered persona thing where I felt like the last bit of assertiveness within my body was contained in some parallel version of myself that happened to be notably more fem than myself.

I should've gotten therapy like 10 years ago. Didn't. Suffered for it. Depression. Reclusion. The downward spiral. No life. No job. No prospects. No experience. No skills. 30 fucking years old. Been living in a prison cell of my own making for 7 years.

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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=c2RuyUHfdWE

After a little rage I feel right as rain

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>50+ inches of snow expected for this winter
Welp I guess I'm doing nothing but stocking up on winter stuff black friday.

just looked through the album, is hrt really that magical?

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>>7267632
>>7267655
>>7267677
please stop being sad snicks

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>>7267746
HRT isn't a magic pill
It'll help but you gotta do work too

>>7267737
It's so hard to stay away

>>7267746
Depends on your genetics.

>>7267746
i keep my expectations low
your mileage may vary

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>>7267749
>HRT isn't a magic pill
agreed

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>>7267739
[spoiler]I do[/spoiler]
It's a full service grocery store, I have to cash, bag, and load their carts.

>>7267740
Some do, it's my job to bag for them though.
I hate it when people give me really awful bags and 400 dollars of groceries and then just sit there and stare while I struggle with them.

>>7267749
You look healthier and happier. God damn you are cute.

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>>7267754
I kinda want to try cycling progesterone now that I'm almost 11 months and actually have boobs
>>7267756
Aww, thanks.
Depression's gone but idk about healthier lol

>>7267716
If my experience indicates anything, dysphoria is not necessarily constant, and some days you might not even notice it, then other days it just utterly disables you.

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>>7267755
Woah that's lame as fuck, in the grocery stores I've been too the customer has to load the cart.

>>7267746
No they're just dedicated and feminine. If you're a masculine hon there's not a lot of hope anyone will teach you to be a girl.

>>7267749
>>7267754
Please stop it's not the right time of day to post vomit inducing pics yet.

>>7267758
can't recommend cycling it tbqh
from my experience it just destabilizes your mood
frankly i had better experiences with just having a stable daily dose
>>7267762
sorry salty bae

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>Starts reading history articles and is hit by the realization my lineage can be traced back to the proud and invincible Spanish Empire and its mighty conquistadores and I will singlehandedly end that lineage by turning my dick into an useless vestigial appendage by taking pills to turn me into a cute girl.
Feels good man.

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>>7267746
It's not

>>7267761
This.

Unless you passed before hrt and were a femboy. You have no hope.

>>7267755
So they just stand around at your check out for 15 minutes and make you do everything and make everyone else wait instead of doing it themselves and leaving in 2 minutes?

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>>7267754
You look as if you became more butch as transition went.

>>7267763
You still look like a man in your new pics.

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I think I might do a pair of these for my snow boots, in grey
I like the rubber part since the snow gets deep and my feet will sink into the snow, i like how high up they go, and i like the fuzzy liner around the top of the boots
>>7267763
How long did you keep a daily dose going?

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>>7267761
>If you're a masculine hon there's not a lot of hope anyone will teach you to be a girl.
>>7267765
>Unless you passed before hrt and were a femboy. You have no hope.

Don't try to kill peoples' hope. There's being realistic, and then there's being a fucking asshole.

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>>7267760
Mhmm
I do all that for 40 hours a week. It's actually pretty hard on the body.

>>7267768
Yes
This is what I deal with day in and day out.

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why does my repression beard always make me subconsciously rage

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>>7267774
If they feel there's no hope left for them clearly the best way to handle that is ruin it for everyone else too
Misery loves company.

>>7267774
Neither of us are being an asshole.

>>7267774
it's the truth.

Passing is reserved for a chosen few. The lucky ones. This is just a fact.

>>7267778
Because facial and body hair is fucking awful and I hate it.

>>7267778
you're a girl

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>>7267775
>I do all that for 40 hours a week. It's actually pretty hard on the body.
Service industry jobs suck. I got so over-stressed and worked on friday I started feeling dizzy and nauseous
I legit wonder if I can handle this job for much longer and if it's taking a real toll on my body

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>>7267775
Money is money I guess.

>>7267765
>not naming that image mtfg.jpg

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>tfw fresh hotel room and spa

NO NEED FOR TENTS

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>>7267786
Yeah well there's nothing I can do about that.

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>>7267789
I make slightly more than minimum wage, so I don't have much of that either ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

>>7267787
Have you considered a change of scenery?
You work in a grocery store too right?

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>>7267790
but this is mtfg.jpg

>>7267796
>Have you considered a change of scenery?
Plenty of times but receptionist jobs for half the hours won't cut it.
>You work in a grocery store too right?
I do fast food now, I was in grocery before but got abused so I left.

>>7267781
Why should people be allowed happiness just because of the circumstances of their birth or luck of their genetics?

>>7267781
That's a lie, I pass and look better than most of you. If telling you that you should be able to figure out how to pass on your own ruins your hope then you weren't going to turn out well anyway. But go ahead and tell yourself that everyone is miserable and angry if that makes you feel better.

>>7267794
theres lots you can do about that but you're just afraid

>>7267775
You must get paid a lot to have to deal with that kind of behavior.

>>7267802
>If telling you that you should be able to figure out how to pass on your own
That's different than just telling someone they're not going to pass, period.

>>7267791
Muff I love you and I think it's cool you still wear diapers

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Meh I don't feel like getting dragged into a pissing match with /mtfg/'s wastebin, night everyone! Elanna I wanna talk about jobs and stuff another time.

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>>7267796
Damn you have a minimum wage that is close to my min. wage. Though when I'm 21 my min. wage will be at least $16 AUD :3

>>7267813
Sleep well!

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>>7267791
hey muff, how are you?
I bet it feels good to get out of the cold (thats why I love winter)
you're basically living my ideal life btw
are you going to build a cabin with a stove eventually?

>>7267807
I didn't say nobody can pass and neither did the other anon. You have a way of seeing something that's only in your head, maybe you're the one that's too far gone and miserable.

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>>7267801
>when you realise the true redpill

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=93tR96egox4

I've been such a fool, MTFG. A Man will always be a man. There is no new woman. We tried so hard to create a society that was equal, where there'd be nothing to envy your neighbour. But there's always something to envy. A height, good genetics, something you don't have and want to appropriate. In this world, even a Hugboxed one, there will always be rich and poor. Rich in gifts, poor in gifts. Rich in love, poor in love.

Now. Let me show you where /pol/ is
*gets shot*

>>7267813
Sweet dreams grace I love you very much

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>>7267806
11 dollars an hour
After tax I take home about $370 a week.
Feels good to have a degree.

>>7267800
Idk, fast food and grocery are particularly hard though. I see your point however.
>>7267813
Goodnight grace

>>7267819
>In this world, even a Hugboxed one, there will always be rich and poor. Rich in gifts, poor in gifts. Rich in love, poor in love.

Then I suppose we'll just have to rip this world apart and build a better one.

What does everyone talk about on discord? Im afraid to go there.

>>7267819
We must me our own martyrs, Amy. We treat everyone the way we want to be treated and act as if the world is already the way it should be. When we fail, we will fail trying. And when we die, we will die living.

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>>7267804
I'll try again later today

>>7267813
nini grace uwu

>>7267819
Always the hopeless that get involved with /pol/ in any way.
>>7267825
Sounds like the plot of a fantasy novel, you should write a book.
>>7267828
Very deep, you must have such a high opinion of your own intellect.

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>>7267814
I mean, one would hope that you're making more than minimum wage at 21 if you play your cards right but look at what happens if you don't.
6 years of school for this shit, someone please end me.

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>>7267829
good girl just please stop putting it off

>>7267813
I give you 40 minutes until you're done sleeping and start shitposting again

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>>7267835
>6 years of school for this shit
Our generation in a nutshell.

>>7267835
Maybe you should go back to school and get a degree in something that can get you a job.

>>7267842
t. boomer

>>7267808
Yeah cause wearing diapers is cool

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>>7267842
What decade are you living in? University degrees are literally toilet paper if you don't have connections and experience.

>>7267841
Idk, mistakes were made, I basically only remained in university because my parents expected it of me.

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>>7267835
Don't you have a degree in programming? Jeez I thought that shit was in high demand. I hope the jobs come back when I'm in the proper workforce ;-;

>>7267850
there are no jobs we are in a global recession
those who have a job right now are lucky

>>7267848
>sister spent a decade in and out of college
>drained parents of money until finally getting some bs cop out degree
>now works at starbucks

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>>7267850
My bachelor's is in chemistry.
Programming is something that's entirely self taught, I'm attempting to get into that as a career.

>>7267859
Take a code testing job, and work up.

>>7267832
>Very deep, you must have such a high opinion of your own intellect.
Nah, I'm just good at saying shit like that. In text anyway. I was diagnosed with bipolar disorder and what helped was changing the way I was thinking when I was at the depressive state. I have a private blog where I go on long rambling motivational pep talks like that for myself. Usually they're less generic and more specific and about current minor issues and how tiny those issues are. Or how I should ignore my failures and concentrate on things I succeed at.

Essentially I work myself into a frenzy because it's easier to deal with the world in that state. I had gotten so good at it my therapist told me I didn't have to come back unless I felt like it.

Essentially, I made myself crazy in a functional way. My therapist and I worked on becoming aware of when depression happens. And I privately worked on steeling myself when it happens and start telling myself crazy motivational shit like that. I guess I know it's mad talk but I also believe it. At least at the time of when it comes out of my head.

>>7267859
>>7267864
When you apply, make it known you want to become a programmer.

Area of programming you'd like to do?

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>>7267858
>tfw sister has a master's degree that she entirely paid for herself, and was living on her own for a few years beforehand
>tfw she's working within her field, married and probably going to end up in a good place
>tfw I'm the fuckup that drained parents for years and ended up in a dead end service job

>>7267864
Is that generally something that interns are offered?

>>7267868
Idk, I enjoyed .NET stuff when I was tinkering with it. I think I'd like to do desktop application programming, but I know jobs for that are a bit harder to come by.
I'm trying to learn mean stack webdev right now but it's slow going, it's very different from what I'm used to.

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>>7267828
But it's so much easier to just be nothing and keep the pain to myself

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One day someone will love me. Right?

>>7267771
yes
>>7267773
all the time since all females display a constant level of prog

>>7267874
as long as you aren't sheen

>>7267835
>>7267835
I know that feel, elanna. Th previous job I worked at for a while was minimum wage for my state: $7.65 an hour at 25 years old. *I* am the biggest loser. I was so fucking mentally dead there. I got stupid lucky after and do $11.55/hour at a new job now that I could do for a few years without wanting to kill myself.

No degree yet, but I was on and off again in school for years and did so bad financial aid was pulled on me and loans piled up. I had another lucky moment where I applied for an appeal for financial aid and ran right into literally the person in charge of appeals in an unlikely building. I'm back in school part-time. It's slow going but the student loans left are frozen and subsidized and financial aid is covering everything because of how hilariously poor I am.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o-eVxtuMR0o

>>7267871
Interns usually get coding assignments. Testing is one way others outside the industry get into programming, unless their outside experience gave them coding work.

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>>7267859
Well good luck with whatever happens.

>>7267836
I'm not sure I'm trans anymore.
I'm not really dysphoric. I just get upset if I think about it at certain times.
If I was tru trans I would have said something in childhood

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>>7267886
Almost noone says anything in childhood..

>>7267882
Welp, I can only hope some persistence will pay off
Sadly I have uncompleted computer related coursework so it probably looks bad

>>7267881
That's fucking brutal
At least you're in school and it sounds like things are stable though. What are you studying?

>>7267883
Ty Emily I'm gonna need it

>>7267886
you're moving onto bargaining.
depression is next and finally acceptance.
you will get there.

Five stages of grief.

1. Denial & Isolation
2. Anger
3. Bargaining
4. Depression
5. Acceptance

Has anyone seen Kayla? What happened with that guy?

>>7267772
weird how I pass regardless of you opinion
innit ?

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>>7267891
You know from experience I go through acceptance and then go straight back to denial

I literally run through all those steps everyday

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2rgepWg4rzw

>tfw I've fucked up myself so bad. I need to learn how to break through more repression layers.

>>7267890
Write some apps for smartphones. Build up a body of work to show off.

>>7267711
This makes me hate myself even more

Larry

>>7267891
>Acceptance

http://m.wikihow.com/Let-Go-of-Your-Dreams

>>7267890
Why not find work involving chemistry?

>>7267843
>>7267848
People get hired for jobs in their field all the time.

>>7267909
pretty sure thats meant to be satire?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lLeCB7Kn-VE

>>7267903
I think it looks silly.

>>7267872
Personally, I hate myself a lot less since I've started trying again. Even though I'm struggling to think of things I've succeeded at doing lately. I also have to remind myself to be as patient with me as I am with others. Yes I know I'm a piece of shit, but everyone else is actually a piece of shit too and I'm patient with them.

>>7267890
>What are you studying?
Gotta get that meme degree! Computer Information Science.

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>>7267914
I think I would resent myself if I ever let myself take titty skittles and fuck up my entire facade of normality

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>>7267910
Not possible with anything less than a master's, and I'm not willing to commit to more school in a field that I simply don't enjoy

>>7267911
Yes, and most of them didn't spend their university years being a depressed shut in tranny, and were making friends and building a work history.

>>7267900
That's what I be doing, it's time consuming though

>>7267911
FIRM HANDSHAKE

>>7267865
>>7267881
>>7267914
On a scale from 0 to 10 I would place you as batshit insane. How do you hide it from people in your daily life?

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how to kill myself?

>>7267920
>>7267924
How hard is it for you to do a skype interview?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Id_UYLPSn6U

>>7267920
Good luck with it.

>>7267929
Why do you want to die now?

>>7267929
You do something to distract you from how terrible things feel and slowly pull out of the funk as you move forward and improve. Eventually you maybe even find true happiness.

Don't let depression drag you down. You can fight it. You can smile again.

>>7267918
it's a gamble

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>>7267930
It's like you think people with bachelor's degrees in this field even get past the first screening.

>>7267929
Be someone better than you.

>>7267933
life is suffering

>>7267934
i cant do anything. i will never get out of this because i'm truly stuck in an awful situation. the only way out is to die

>>7267937
I didn't say that and I didn't choose your degree for you.

>tfw nobody to
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Dx1XtKbEtfE

>>7267942
Awful situations don't last forever. With effort and positive thinking there is always a way out that lets you move forward.

Don't give up. Don't ever give up.

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3 hours train ride ahead of me
I wish there was a gender clinic in my city ._.

>>7267906
yes bro ?

>>7267928
I don't talk about ANYTHING personal unless someone specifically asks about it.

Here I'm mostly trying to relate so I am talking about personal things. I think I come off as weird but harmless and kind of friendly in person. If it makes you feel any better I don't present female. I mostly aim for "gay boy".

What in particular makes me come off as batshit insane? All the weird little self-motivational things I say? Because those are mostly private thoughts.

>>7267942
Let's talk about it, tell me about your life.
Do you have close friends?
Do you go to school?
Do you like where do you live?
Are you employed?
How is your transition going?
Do you take drugs?
Are you seeing a therapist?
Does your significant other know how you feel?

>>7267918
I am the biggest example of why repression doesn't work, I told myself for years that I wasn't trans and that it was just a fetish and that I wasn't ever going to transition and then did a dumbass thing and intentionally manned up and I got broken, told myself my family would abandon me and was dreaming of building a house so I could escape to and transition in peace and when that fell through the plan was to kill myself at 30.
Then I got ill and everything came crashing in on me and I decided it was time to at least try before killing myself. I'm still barely here 3 years later and I honestly do believe that I might end up being okay with my bad situation as long as I can dig myself out of my own misery caused from such a long and needless repression.

Faye is the same age as me and repressed, went into the army and eventually once she started looking and feeling like shit she transitioned and she got incredibly lucky as far as genetics go.
I am not sure what her emotional crutch was in repression but mine was eating.

>>7267951
Yes it's for the best you keep them private.

>>7267955
If I talk about them do you think they'll take me away and put me in one those mental facilities? Because as long as I get to keep taking my prescriptions I'd be down for that for a year. Maybe I could pick up painting. Or find time to read that backlog of books.

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>>7267929
suicide is fascinating to think about

>>7267954
Don't give up hope. Faye only dates girls young enough to be her daughter, that can be you in a year with just a slimming shake a day.

>>7267957
Your therapist should be able to hook you up with the voluntary lock up.

>>7267954
But I am an ogre. All transition does is socially cripple me ten years earlier than it would have usually.

>>7267954
>incredibly lucky as far as genetics go
odd that an old fag like yourself has never seen candid pic of faye

>>7267942
No don't

>>7267952
I have no friends in real life, lol. I'm completely isolated because of the paranoia my family gives me
I dropped out of school 3 years ago at 16
I do enjoy living near Boston, its convenient for me
I'm not employed anymore
My transition is going ok. My chest is really sore
I used to smoke weed sometimes but not anymore
I'm not seeing a therapist because I'm too scared to think of how my mom would react if she found out
I don't have a significant other and probably wont ever have one because i've had almost no experience with talking to people, i'd be too stupid for someone to love me

>>7267967
They're programmed to only see what can't hurt them.

>>7267965
maybe so but plenty of ogres have transitioned just fine.
put it this way, do you want to be spending your 30s worrying about transition and getting your life sorted and wondering where to get the money for anything (like me) or do you want a relatively painless transition in your 20s and FFS + SRS way before you're 30 and spending the best years of your 20s just being you?

>>7267967
I have seen several photos fayngle and normal angle and those that have been shoops in both directions and everything in between.
faye looks like a normal woman our age... I look like a woman 15 years older.

existence is depressing

>>7267961
I still want to see what Sheen will look like thinner.

>>7267964
Now that we're talking about it, I'm in the US so this wouldn't be free. It sounds expensive actually. I'd rather just keep playing the society game and accumulate money instead of more debt.

>>7267974
Get employed again, find roommates, move the fuck out.
Transition in peace with a therapist's support.

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>>7267977
existence is the only thing not depressing

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>>7267978
like this

>>7267974
Find a therapist to talk to if you're isolated.

>>7267978
Some places are free like jails.

>>7267974
You're unemployed, transitioning and are scared of how your mom would feel if she found out you were seeing a therapist? Does she know about the hrt? Is she buying it for you?

>>7267977
No, you're depressing.

>>7267976
I have no choice when you put it like that.

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>>7267981
Sometimes I wish I'd just overdosed

>>7267988
No, I'm unintentionally hilarious

>>7267978
>>7267985
Massachusetts has really good services I think.

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>>7267991
You're going to want to pick a more effective method than that.

>>7267980
employment is really draining. plus i already do know how i'd be able to move out sometime soon-ish because of an online friend who is willing to help me. i just cant imagine having to tell my mom that i'm moving and how she'd react. i would be guaranteed to never be able to return, so i'd have to somehow send EVERYTHING of mine before i moved. i just want to break down and cry when thinking about having to deal with the yelling and her trying to deny me of leaving

>>7267987
The state pays for my HRT. She knows I'm on it and tries to make me feel bad every chance she gets

http://www.trans-health.com/2001/lose-muscle-gain-fat-dieting-for-mtfs/

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>going back to the psych ward
Nottu dissu shitu again

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>>7267989
I don't think I'm really in the mood rn

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>>7267996
>wanting to lose muscles
fags

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>>7267996
>Raverdyke
I fucking died. Then googled that handle and found pictures of exactly what was on the tin, even when using their real name.

Honestly... she passes as a dyke. So mission accomplished.

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Ughhhhh i hate my curly hair so much
Litterally 10 mins of being outside and now my hair is a frizzy mess

>>7268004
i have that same issue

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>>7267509
Can't go to sleep :/ took too much coffee.
Thinking about smoking weed but i have work in 8hours and i need my sleep for my nogains

>>7268006
The worst thing is i need to be out and about all day with this hair
Guess ill have my hoodie up all day

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>>7267996
>"Spartan...no..."

>>7267995
>The state pays for my HRT. She knows I'm on it and tries to make me feel bad every chance she gets


Here's the story of the mother who was a controlling, abusive bitch. She divided her children with lies and promises of wealth, shattered their family, and kept lying to them to try and maintain control. And then when she grew old the one child that stayed loyal to her smothered her with a pillow so he could be the first to ransack her place for money to buy drugs.

And that's how my grandmother died.

If your mom wants to live like a bitch, karma will make sure she dies like a bitch.

>>7268014
These problems go away if you have some one putting it inside you

is it okay to die

>>7268019
what makes you the beanboy?

>>7268020
No. Live. Get better. Stronger. Smarter. Do good. Love you.

I'm sorry that I'm sad goodnight ;-;

>>7268020
you will die one day.
that is okay because we all die some day

>>7268024
do you really work at walmart?

>have butch dyke face and personality
>only into guys though esp. after hrt
Why am I even dysphoric rofl

>>7268020
Everybody does eventually so yeah I think so

>>7268016
all you have to do is work out you BMR, eat less than that whilst going vegan, do cardio

>>7267998
hugggg

>>7268022
but i can't do those things

>>7268024
Hugg Elann

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>>7268024
its okay to be sad, occasionally
nn elanna

>>7268035
No excuses.

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>>7268021
"The" BeanBoy?
I've done some shit while in group chats with pic proofs that kinda got people talking about me
Also i have the ability to verbally shitpost and am like genuinely a cool dude to talk to over the internet bcuz i have unique experiences that are interesting to some people

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>>7268030
I bet some guys do like the dyke look and would want to date someone like that.

At least... I hope so.

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>Been on hormones for just under a month
>People have been complimenting my hair and skin lately 100% in boy mode saying it looks really nice and smooth

a-am I gonna make it?

>>7267999
sorry elanna i thought it would be funny for some reason but after posting it it wasn't sorry

>>7268047
idk

>>7268044
is that you? are you trans ?

>>7267998
you need it, take the fucking help instead of being a whiny miserable little shit

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>>7268052
FUCK YOU

>>7268057
retard

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>>7268058
you have no idea who ur messing with :)

>>7268047
i doubt it desu
nicer skin and hair wont mean shit on a man like you

>>7268047
congrats
i've been working on hair and skin but they're both pretty bad

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>>7268047
maybe

>>7268065
u dont even know what I look like DORK

>>7268069
stealing this ty

>>7268053
It's me.
Im not trans im high

>>7268063
sry

>>7268071
i thought you are trans just repressing

>>7268070
i dont have to know
can tell youre an ugly boy
who will never ever pass

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Im 23 years old and still a virgin

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>>7268076
y u gotta bring the whole mood down

>>7268077
What's considered "virgin"?
If I've sucked a dick am I a virgin?
Do I have to get pounded in the ass? If I have a dick do I have to have stuck it in someone else's hole?

>>7268077
What do you look like Dana?