Deadly Hands of Kung Fu Storytime (Part 5)

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>>83749318
It's the "late" edition because it was supposed to be midnight last night instead of 4 PM today. And yes, that means we'll have our regularly scheduled storytime in 8 hours.

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This story just reminds me I need to read Lone Wolf & Cub eventually.

>>83750000
Yeah, Sandho Kim is really leaning hard on Goseki Kojima's style here.

>>83749519
Really digging Nebres' work in this issue.

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>>83750083
Is he? Most my my manga knowledge of from shounen (I like to think it's some decent shounen, but that's like saying "decent capeshit"), so I don't know much about his work outside of his reputation

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Shit, my page is messed up. THIS page is supposed to go first, and THEN >>83750239

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This seems like a bad idea.

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You just KNOW they had to think of an insult for him to use without calling him "nigger".

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My father was in 'Nam, and he didn't learn any martial arts outside of the Marine Corp. I call bullshit on this guy.

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Man, they really don't put much into these racist insults besides "Slant" do they? I mean, that's all this guy seems to use.

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ANOTHER Bruce Lee cover.

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Remember when "Oriental" wasn't racist?

>>83749362
As always, anon, thanks a bunch for this storytime.

What are you going to post once these issues are done?

>>83751981
I've been called an "oriental" a couple of times, by older white folk in their 70s who didn't seem to attach any negative connotations to the word—they were simply using it as a synonym for "Asian." It's all about context in usage, I suppose. I mean, I prefer that they didn't use it, of course, but I'm not going to lose my shit over something like that.

>>83751255
Probably Nebres's best opening montage/racap splash page during his run on this series.

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>>83752321
>What are you going to post once these issues are done?

Well after this, we're FINALLY going back to the original Power Man and Iron Fist series. After that I've got a plan, but I want to be a surprise.

Aww shit, Kung Fu Treachery as told by Marvel!

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That is the saddest looking Yakuza I've ever seen.

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>Main character: Iron Fist
>Acquired

>>83753166
Man, this is pretty dark. I can imagine some guy picking up this mag off the rack thinking he's set for maybe half-an-hour of kung fu chopsocky hijinks and just getting hit in the gut with this.

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Shit, I have to go on an errand. I'l continue this in maybe half an hour.

>>83749398
Anyone who's read Master of Kung Fu, which I assume has more of Shang-Chi's friends in it- Is Black Jack Tarr usually this casually racist?

>>83749612
>Fight a bunch of Morbius clones,
>Then a Ghost Rider.

This seems like a hard level.

>>83753385

>>83750083
Wait, when did Lone Wolf and Cub start? Before the mid seventies?

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AND THAT ERRAND LASTED WAY LONGER THAN IT SHOULD HAVE!
Some motherfuckers should clean their garages out, all I'm saying.

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And then the heroes save her, but they die and end up in a small room in Japan with a black ball.

Oh wait, wrong series.

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IRON FIST
R
O
N

F
I
S
T

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This guy looks like someone who would fight Luke Cage.

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>"And the glass upon the man's chest shatters... spilling fluid and all contained upon the filth of the alley's floor"
>"spilling fluid and all contained"
>"all contained"

So Danny just killed a man, because I'm pretty sure we saw a heart and lungs in there.

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Wow, I was taking the piss, they really do acknowledge that Danny straight up killed him.

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>Sir "Not Appearing in this issue"

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>By Chris Claremont

I want you to remember that for the few days it takes to finish this story. Chris Claremont, the guy who writes his damn solo, wrote that story. It will vex and annoy you later.

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And from now on, Iron Fist officially has his own solo stories in this mag. So for those of you who want the Deadly Hands of Kung Fu Omni for Iron Fist? Skip it, he's only in two issues, and wait for the second volume.

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So what is this, the third time we've done Danny's origin?

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His mother doesn't refuse Meachum's help or swear to murder him in this version, so I don't like it.

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Okay, why is his pose like that in the first panel?

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>>83752337
It's sort of like how black people used to be called colored people, and it was fine because that was just what the word was back then (sort of like how certain people say black people is racist and the proper term of "Person of Color"). It's why I always ask "So was this racist then, or have times changed?" I don't want to make a joke about a character being racist if it turns out that it's just one of those things that wasn't racist until the 80's.

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A scene almost exactly like this happened in the Spider-Man manga (known popularly as "Suffering-Man"). Unmasked Spidey waves a woman from getting raped, when he asks her if she's okay, she then assumes he was one of them (or beat them off so he could have her to himself, the series was kind of dark that way).

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Yet again, since Professor Wing is here, this story takes place during the Marvel Premiere times, before Danny got his own solo and Colleen was kidnapped.

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>Dhasha Khan

Despite the obvious connection, especially given what we learn about about him, he has no connection to Master Khan.

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Ask Sabertooth. Turns out he can fight pretty well when he can't se.

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Okay, the Fantastic Four explicitly publish their own comics, and hired the real Stan Lee and Jack Kirby (who may still be around given the sliding timescale).
Avengers probably do the same thing.
But who the hell is in-universe publishing Deadly Hands of Kung Fu? Normally I wouldn't care, but here they are drawing attention to it in a series that otherwise isn't a comedy!

>>83754448
Yes. I guess 'Chinaman' is old-fashioned enough that it seems more hokey than racist.

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>>83758797
Is it racist if Shang-Chi actually IS from China, and basically acts like a sterotype?

>>83756386
First published in 1970.

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THIS, on the other hand, is probably racist. But he's REALLY pissed. And no, I don't intend to storytime that Marvel Team-Up issue.

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No, wait, I still have it. Maybe I'll do it next.

>>83750031
Is it bad that getting a piggy back ride on fast zombie seems kinda fun?

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Gonna be honest Bobbie, you deserved that, and you know it.

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>>83758956
Not when you can run through those thin papar doors sterotype Japan has, and you can feel like the Kool-Aid man or the Juggernaut.

>>83756386
First published in 1970. Deadly Hands started in the mid or late seventies.

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>Chinaman
>Slant
>Little "Yellow" Tyrant

Man, I joked about uncreative racist taunts earlier, but this guy keeps coming up with new ones.

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>"Accept that Lotus has a mind of her own!"

I didn't want to go full Tumblr, but yeah. There's no world where beating the shit out of one of your best friends will get his girlfriend to like you, at least if she's worth having as more than a trophy.

>>83758964
Bob Diamond is worst boy.

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And there you have it, Anons. The end of the Sons of the Tiger...

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And the beginning of the White Tiger

>>83758781
Bob Diamond's agent ended up selling the rights to the comic. Although the way they act, they wrote it as pure fiction and this is a really weird coincidence. But hey, it's just a comic, you should just relax.

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What the hell, let's do it. One more, and then I'll see you in the new topic in about an hour and a half.

Huh, so THIS is what they look like in color.

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>>83759203
>Bob Diamond's agent ended up selling the rights to the comic. Although the way they act, they wrote it as pure fiction and this is a really weird coincidence.
Shit, that'd make perfect sense. Okay, fair enough.

>But hey, it's just a comic, you should just relax.
It's one thing when Marlo ran a comic shop in Captain Marvel, that series was pretty much a comedy, so it was just a joke. Same with She-Hulk, or most times it's done. My autism isn't THAT far gone. It's just when it's done in what is otherwise a really serious story, where three best friends tear themselves apart over a woman they love that that little voice in my head starts buzzing.

>>83758417
Person of Color just refers to any non-white person.

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The main reason I get annoyed over stuff like that? Enough other series have answered these kinds of questions.

My favorite example was the reveal of who owns the Spider-Girl shop in MC2. It was Mary Jane, and she used the profits as a college fund.

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>>83759320
It's also a lot more of a mouthful than "Asian" "Black Person" "or "Hispanic". I long to live in a world where people will take for granted that, I'm just trying to use the word that won't piss them off.

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So did the Fantastic Four ever try getting the Human Torch to turn Sandman to glass? I feel like that's just enough comic book science for them to try it at least once.

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>Crime-Master

When was the last time this guy showed up? Or the Masters of Evil? Or any of those groups which have names that scream "I'm the evil villain, and I know it!"

>>83759363
I just think it's kind of funny that the alleged reason for saying POC instead of non-whites is that you're lumping together a bunch of people based on the fact that they're not white...but Person of Color does that too.

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Okay, I get why the three of them dress the same, but why is Lin following their color scheme too?

>>83759173
White Tiger: the World's most successful dumpster diver.

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>>83759465
I like to think it's worse, since PoC literally does that. It somehow looks at Jamal Brown, Shu Li, and Jesus Hernandes and decides that they belong in the same group, but Sam Smith has nothing to do with them.

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>"We're gonna get YOU next, Slant-Eyes!"

Wow, I wouldn't have expected that kind of racism from the comic books. You know, harsher rules and all that. Or is that just "times have changed" again?

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I don't know why they're surprised. I mean, they beat God in a Kung Fu fight a little while ago. I'd think they'd be jaded after that.

>>83758051
So his guts are just...floating around? That doesn't seem healthy.

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>>83759680
Do we have any doctors in the thread (and if so, I'd like to think you'd have better things to do than read 40 year old Kung Fu comics) that can confirm of deny that that's what the body would look like if glass were there?

>>83759621
I remember in a Defenders comic a guy almost blurts out nigger at one point.

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Ladies, panel five is why if you're going to kung fu fight you should have short hair.

And yet none of the recent "Practical" Women's costumes have them with short hair, I believe.

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>>83759817
>"NAGGERS!"

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Why isn't he turning into sand immediately?

>>83759108
Yeah, it's intentional that they're writing Bob as seeing Lotus as more of prize to win than a person with feelings.

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So were these two before the Kingpin, or after he fucked off? Because I feel like he'd have words over "I AM NOW THE KING OF CRIME!"

>>83759494
She's got team spirit!

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And you are now realizing we went an entire issue, featuring FOUR Kung-Fu heroes, and with Fancy Dan, and the closest we got to a legit Kung Fu battle was one panel on the ninth page.

Anyway, see you in an hour (in a different thread) with our regularly scheduled Deadly Hands of Kung Fu!

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>>83759871
Nah, just the first couple letters. Also has the first time I've seen MCU citizens doing the right thing.

>>83759757
Shouldn't it be "Pepita es muerta", since death is not a temporary state?

>>83750353
>For committing murder as an act of self-defense

>You see, some ignorant brother wouldn't keep quiet while I was talking and I defensively punched him in the neck.

>>83758937

I'd like to see the Sons of the Tiger in the Netflix shows. Have them be a team that encountered the Hand in the past and then split up. Abe Brown went back to Harlem and can be this experienced martial artist Luke Cage runs into. Bob Diamond does coke. Lin Sun does his own thing. Lotus Shinchuko gets captured for the Hand. During the Defenders crossover, reunite the three and have them save Lotus.

Bump. Just got back from work and this thread's still here... time to end my day with some comics!

>>83749318
Thank you

>>83751981
It's still kinda ambiguous in Britain, considering Asian= South Asian. Oriental=East Asian

>>83750594
>I believe that all life is sacred
>Except of course, Ninjas.

>>83765387
Ninjas aren't really alive, they're like robots that way.

>>83751808
>Next: At Last: What the Hell is Happening

>>83767530