Motherfucking Lentils

>>7572160
Well, that depends on what kind of lentils. I love making fried chickpeas to go with chicken, or split pea daal.

First pick out any rocks by spreading a handful of the lentils onto a white plate and checking carefully. Then rinse.
I pressure cook them with 1 part lentil and 5 parts water, with tomato paste for 10 minutes or so.

Then when they're done add a bunch of spices, and eat with some toasted whole wheat bread.

I like them. I just do them simply, either Swiss/southern German style or Neapolitan style.

For Neapolitan:

Lentils, 200g/half pound
Water, 1 litre/quart, more if/as needed
Garlic, 3-4 cloves, smashed flat
Olive oil, 80ml/third cup US
Parsley, a handful of leaves
Salt, to taste
Spaghetti, dry, broken into spoonable size, 300g

In a pot, combine all ingredients except salt and pasta.
Bring to the boil and cook until lentils are done.
Salt to taste, then add the pasta.
Boil until the pasta is done, adding a little boiling water from a kettle at a time, if/as necessary.
Adjust salt, if needed, and serve.

For Swiss/German:
Same basic idea, minus the pasta and swapping out the garlic for onion and carrot, the parsley for celery and the oil for any other cooking fat.
Once cooked and reduced to be quite thick, boil some spätzle and drain.
Top the spätzle with the stewed lentils and serve with hot dogs.
>some people boil the sausages with the lentils, so you can try that, too.

>>7572160
>chickpeas to go with chicken
That sounds entirely appropriate

>>7572186
>First pick out any rocks
Jesus christ, that's actually a general lentil issue?

>eat with some toasted whole wheat bread
That does sound bretty tasty

Mujaddara!

>>7572187
>Swiss/German
Sounds fucking delicious.
>serve with hot dogs
Seems a bit out of place, but I'm all for it

>>7572208
I was going to get at you for being a kebab, but that actually looks decent

>>7572202
>Jesus christ, that's actually a general lentil issue?
absolutely. I bit down on a rock once.

>>7572160
make an indian/pakistani curry with lentils and potatoes. very cheap and very filling.

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Different lentils have different applications...

Red lentils for soup. Green french lentils are a side dish/salad (pic related)

>>7572384
>proscuitto
>mozarella
>>>/int/>>>/o/ >>>/t/>>>/h/>>>/e/ >>>/trash/ >>>/i/>>>/t/ >>>/g/>>>/o/>>>/e/>>>/s/.

Remember, beans and rice are very nice.

Lentils are one of the quickest beans (legumes, I know, purists - anybody have a peanut (legume) recipe that might substitute for beans???).

They make a great combo with rice and you can cook them together if you have a rice that takes 30 - 40 minutes. With Basmati (20 min) start the lentils 10 min ahead, then add the rice.

Flavour at will. I use homemade stock, so usually eat them straight from the pan.

>>7572458
>usually eat them straight from the pan
Savage as fuck

>>7572458

Also, they are not niggers. They are a food staple.

For Nigger, see Woman is the Nigger of the World by Lennon & Ono:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CtY5bv-oxLE

>>7572458
>rice

Wheat>rice

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>>7572470

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>>7572491

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eu6ioKjZsGU

>>7572160
I love to mix lentils and rice. The cook time and water needed(2 to 1)is the same so they cool well together. Add some Gram Marsala. Then, separately, sautéed some onions with tumric.
Mix the two. Eat it.

>>7572230
>I was going to get at you for being a kebab,
kebabs have god tier food. well just the syrians and lebanese

>>7572208
tayub habibi

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>>7572160
boil off a batch, separate it into two parts (check for rocks). put one part in a food processor and chill the fuck out for a minute, ok? just.. chill. we'll come back to it. strain the other half and put it into a butter pan or other small cookware.

get you some chopped up veg. carrots, fucking cauliflower, onions, snap peas, whatever. blanch or steam those off (par-cooked, not all the way) and get a saute pan ready with some oil with a good tablespoon of yellow curry powder ready to go. ok now saute that veg off and hit it with half the curry powder, and start puree-ing up those lentils in the food processor. go back to your bowl of not-pureed lentils and reheat them in your butter pan or whatever with just a bit of water covering them. by the time all this shit is set up the saute should be nearly done, so angle your pan and push all the veg off the heat to the back of your pan, so the oil drains away to the front side of the pan (over the flame) and start folding your lentil puree into the oil, adding more curry powder to taste until it's all reheated. grill off some naan bread right now if you want - the other lentils should be reheated by now, too.

plate it however you like.

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Ever tried associating green lentils, beets & feta on a bed of lettuce, sprinkled w/vinaigrette?

>>7572202
it's an issue with any dried beans

>>7573275
>rice needs 2:1 ratio

holy BALLS you are the reason most americans don't like rice. nobody likes fucking rice soup.

The correct ratios are
1 : 1 white rice
1.5 : 1 brown rice
2 : 1 wild/very thick germ rice

Here in hawaii we make nice fluffy fucking delicious rice. I could honestly just eat rice and soy sauce for dinner. But what you faggots do to it on the mainland is inexcusable.

RED LENTIL MASTERRACE

boil water, turn off heat, throw em in, take off heat, let sit for 15 minutes, lightly shake pot occasionally

if they're still hard at all, put on burner a tiny bit

if you're a skillful master you will have individual little caviars instead of pink mush. gently toss some good buttery herb shit into em

also lentil soup is shit, it's a horrible concoction, don't ever do it, don't ever buy it, don't ever enjoy it

>>7573587
Is there a good lentil and bean guide you would recommend?

>>7573579
I just did this and it turned out practically raw and shitty. Thanks faggot.

>>7574576
Keep the lid on so it steams arsehole

>>7573275
I made a lentil soup with rice, have a great recipe for it. I make it in a pressure cooker.

No need to presoak the green lentils. Here's my recipe all sloppy and what not.

Pressure Cooker Green Lentils

Ingredients
1lb Green Lentils
1/4 cup basmati rice
2 carrots, chopped sliced thin whatever
2 celery sticks, chopped sliced thin whatever
2 tomatoes chopped or about 12 ounces pureed chopped tomatoe juice
1 medium sized onion. chopped sliced whatever
3 cloves garlic, sliced thin
1 bayleaf
salt pepper to taste
Olive Oil, however much you need to saute with
3 quarts water

Saute the onions in some olive oil till they turn translucent, then carrots & celery, then garlic for a minute or two, throw the bayleaf in too, cause who cares really.

Pour tomato juice onto sauted crap, let that cook up a bit and bubble a minute or two.

Dump lentils into mix, let them cook a minute or two if you want, then just dump in 3 quarts of water, rinse the basmati for now and set it to the side.

Seal pressure cooker, cook on low pressure for 12 minutes then quick release the pressure using cold water method, or if you're autistic release it through the valve to hear it hissing.

Open cooker after pressure quick release, dump in rinsed basmati rice, seal cooker again, get it to high pressure for only one minute, then let cooker cool down 10minutes natural release, if pressure hasn't dropped in 10 minutes, do cold water method or manually release pressure.

NOTES: I could be off a bit with the water, I use a non-venting pressure cooker at home, so if using venting I guess you have to compensate for liquid lost to venting. You don't need rice for this recipe so if you don't add rice cook on low pressure for 15 minutes and then let it naturally release for 10minutes.

All the vegetables you want, including tubercles in a pressure cooker with lentils.

Remember to soak them over night and watch ou for small stones.

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Is this common world wide or is this justeuropeanthing? Sour lentils it is.

>500g lentils
>500ml stock
>2 onions
>garlic
>1 tbsp of lard
>1 tbsp of flour
>1 tbsp of sugar
>3 tbsp of vinegar
>salt
>pepper

>>7573579
uhhhh since when do most americans not like rice? maybe they don't eat it as much as other cultures, but i've never met anyone tell me they hate rice.

>>7573587
>lentil soup is shit
tastes great if you make your own stock (which you didn't) and have a general idea of how to cook (which you don't)

>>7572160
Easiest way to make lentils taste good is to add bacon, cook whatever vegetables you're adding in bacon fat, then use chicken stock or bouillon cubes instead of plain water.

>>7575056
Also, you literally only need once slice to bacon to make a whole pot taste good.

>>7572160
i make madjara very good

>>7574698
>>7575056
Saute stuff with a little bacon grease added to the olive oil, goes a long way in adding great flavor to the end product. Pork fat make lentil soups taste superb, using a chicken broth does too.
>>7575017
Probably a euro thing, my grandma would sometimes add vinegar, I sometimes do too.

>>7572160
Mirepoix & bacon

My favorite lentil recipe:

http://www.epicurious.com/recipes/food/views/lebanese-lentil-and-rice-pilaf-with-blackened-onions-108813

>>7572208
>Mujaddara!

This guy knows what's up.

>>7572208
What kind of vegetables do you serve this stuff with?
Because it sounds delicious, but not like a complete meal.

put em in waffles or burritos.

>>7577489
Burritos sure, but waffles?
What kind of waffles are you eating?

>>7577485
It's very filling. I usually just eat it with some yogurt on top. You can serve any veg you like on the side, but I don't really think it's necessary. You could mix some veggies into the yogurt maybe, like saute some spinach up with garlic and mix that in.

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In a pot on medium heat:
>Sesame oil
>2 red onions (or 1 large red onion), diced
>A big spoon of minced garlic

Sautee five minutes. Add:
>1 red bell pepper, diced
>Handful of chopped mint leaves
>Smoked paprika
>Sumac
>Lemon juice
>Cumin
>Black pepper
>Optional splash of red vinegar or wine (not too much, the sumac and lemon are already tart/acidic on their own)
>Soya sauce or salt
>Chili paste (such as sambal oelek) or chopped red chili peppers

At this point it should taste a bit too strong to be palatable on its own, because it will be used to provide flavour to the entire stew once the rest of the ingredients are added. With that in mind, add a few good spoons of the savoury spices and a bit too much of the peppery ones, really get a fragrant and flavourful base going.

Slightly reduce heat, sautee and cover. Let it all sweat, get everything turned into a bit of a paste. Once it's all looking good, add:
>1 can of crushed tomatoes (unseasoned, exact size isn't very important as long as it's like a 300-500ml can and not gigantic or tiny)
>1-2 cans of water or chicken stock

Cover again and bring to a boil.
>If using water in the previous step, add your bouillon/soup base and mix it in
>***WARNING** IF YOU USE VEGETABLE BOUILLON THIS RECIPE WILL BECOME VEGAN, BEWARE AND STAY SAFE
>Add 1 cup of red lentils

Cover again and simmer on low-to-medium low until the lentils are tender.
>Remove from heat and drizzle in tahina (sesame paste), while stirring, until the stew is thickened
>Serve over fresh steamed rice

wa la

This is the best vegan thread we've ever had!

>>7572160
Lentil Dahl soup. I make it a lot and got the recipe from a book called Vegan Planet. I double the spice usually.

food.com have ripped the recipe off here

http://www.food.com/recipe/indian-spiced-lentil-soup-195021

>>7572160
French Lentils are the best for eating in a side dish, or as an entire meal with some kind of grain.
If you're going for a Daal Spinach indian dish, split lentils are your friend.

Just boil the niggers in a pot until they're tender.

>>7572208
My nigga

>>7572422
mozz works with prosciutto

>>7572470
John Lennon is an obscene jerkoff, good riddance.

>>7573587
>also lentil soup is shit, it's a horrible concoction, don't ever do it, don't ever buy it, don't ever enjoy it

Use brown lentils and mix in some goat cheese.

>>7577964
Yes, mozzarella does go quite nicely with prosciutto.
However, mozarella and proscuitto don't at all.