spessmen on a space station - /ss13g/

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>security attempting to flash clown

american whores

Geneticists belong in research, not medbay

I love you Pomf!

On a scale from one to ten, how bad of an idea is it to put xenobio on the asteroid with the rest of the xeno- jobs?

I EAT GARBAGE

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>just want to go mining and relax
>right as I exit the airlock, some faggot ass ling stuns me, kills me and absorbs me
Fuck you

>>152196212
>giving xenobiologist an even bigger excuse to ignore science
No, they need some sunlight.

>>152196212
Polaris/10
which means good

>>152195998
who cares? how does this effect anything?

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>>152196016

>>152196212
why/10, it already exist on the main station and since z levels are too large its not like you need to remove it for space when someone wants to map something.

>>152196212
1, it's an amazing idea. Show me where to sign, I want this in effect immediately

>>152196212
>Get gold slimes
>Make the xenobio into a pokemon arena versus the miners
>Or, steadily release the creatures you dislike into the roid like some sorta frankenstein

10/10/10*10 make it happen

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>>152196448

>>152196212
Well I was considering remapping the box xenobio to have 6 slime cages like it used to be and one new borer cage. Putting it on the asteroid would mean just deleting that whole part of the station, including the favored cult/vamp maint hideout.

This has been the fastest round ever.

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>Start round
>SMEEELLELLELE
t-thanks pomf

gr8 round ladz

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first ever ss13 speedrun

Submit that shit to AGDQ

>round starts
>2 secs later
>CAN YOU SMELELELELEL
Vox Head Rev spawned on the roid because Trader.

100% tested before merging guys

Honest

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Meanwhile on cyberpunk /ss13g/

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>only headhead is a trader
>spawns off-station

>>152197341
that's not set on a space station at all
what the fuck is wrong with you?

At this point traders should just be exempt from everything, possible traitors and possible targets.

Make them an autism job, like MoMMI

>>152197186
>>152197354
It's a bit more complex that that, but there were actually three revheads
We're not really sure what happened
All we know is that there was a runtime, four people (including one of the revheads) never had jobs assigned, and the game ended as soon as it began

>>152197983
How can a shit bird betray NanoTrasen when they're not even crew.

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>tfw you are happily doing your gimmicky and your mission specifications get decrypted

Today was a good day.

I fucked the shit out of Whorena

Today was a good day.

>>152200346
>>I fucked the shit out of Whorena
Post logs Deadpool.

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>tfw ded sever ded gaem

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>>152199981
>getting autotatored in the middle of making toxins bombs

>>152200346
just looked through the logs. if it happened today, it wasn't on /vg/

>>152200928
Bomb test in medical, just a bomb.

ded serb?

Did the sever jut die for anyone else?

crash?

>>152202775
maybe

serbia?

>>152202775
someone post the pomf funeral image

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>You are either AFK, experiencing lag or the connection has closed.

>>152202775
up now.

>no chef
>take over the service department to pump out garbage food
CAW

Who was the vox breaking all the windows and being a nigger?

>be geneticist
>other geneticist leaves at start of shift
>only medical doctor immediately goes braindead
>chemist makes 3 alkysine pills and 30 unit bottles of cryo
>Other geneticist comes back, starts getting powers
>Medbay is in disarray, no ryetalyn or alkysine in cryo, fridge quickly runs out
>I try to make more pills
>Patients filtering into medbay, the chemist just leaves, and the other geneticist is autisming on his valid hunting powers
>Just walk out of medbay, head to the bar, and drink myself to death
>Someone drags my body to medbay, in a cruel perversion of ironic justice
>Lay dead in medbay for 10 minutes
>vox trader gets into medbay, clones me as the geneticist from earlier continues to get his powers
>places me into the cryo, filled with 28 units or cryoxadone, will take 5 minutes to recover, and leave me with genetic and brain damage
>server crashes

Aaaaaaand now I am going to uncheck medbay as a medium preference job.

>>152203258
he was a vampire. ziigizu

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>calling the shuttle over a bird breaking windows

100% TESTED
SELF MERGED
/VG/CODE IS SO GOOD WHY WOULD WE WANT TO LOSE THIS?

>>152203315
>Vampire
>in space

why the fuck didn't he burn up then?

>2 speedrun attempts in 3 rounds

wew going fast

>>152203258
Don't worry, he was being lynched when the sever crashed

>>152203315
it was ling, not vamp

>>152203296
>NT so incompentent that Vox Traders move in to steal jobs
just like america

>>152203296
>get killed by vampire
>dragged to medbay
>never ghost out of body
>genetcist strips me and then puts me under a plant
>I stare in disbelief as he goes back to aquring powers
>rotate chair spam and flicker lights
>he dissasembles all the chairs
giant faggot or changeling, i'm not quite sure which

>>152203572
geneticist was a ling too

>>152203572
>rotate chair spam and flicker lights
Ahaha, time to collect my ban-valids!
t.solariousgabriela

>>152203296
>>152203572
I was a changeling. I was trying to act like a shitter who doesn't know anything. Sadly my plan got canceled by a shuttle call.
And I don't get powers to validhunt, I leave that to the people that get powers from me.

>Be legion
>Walking with my other brothers going towards klamot
>make a pretty decent set-up, had to make my own checkpoint
>Letting people in and out
>Had to reject a few raiders
>Fucking hell, what're those guys doing with their guns out
>"What is your business here"?
>He responds with "Yes"
>Walks past the checkpoint and goes into the mine
>Follow him because, "what the fuck are you doing?"
>Find him in the room with the Autolathe
>"The fuck are you doing here man?"
>Kills me wordlessly
I had no chance to kill him, he was wearing power armor and had a fucking plasma gun, I just had a dinky 10mm.

>>152204321
its a bad server

>>152203483
What was self merged?

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>>152205032
for u

OOC: Purplenum: Go to preferences and you can silence the stupid meme shit that the children who run the server think is funny

>>152200497
>>152202273
I went to her house and did her you morons.

>>152196212
Yes because shit gets dangerous with gold slime cores and loose slimes dumbasses get close to
If not just give box an energy field and a bigger containment cage like deff
Also ACTUAL MEDKITS REEEEE
NAnd a fire suit closet so I can have everything I need and can separate from the station
Everything after a large containment box is optional

>>152205614
lmao is she as big of a slut irl as she is ingame?

>>152205614
>house

You obviously didn't if you call that a house

>>152205873
Damn did she let you come over and fuck her too?
>>152205614
Post address so I can get some easy whore pussy too.

>>152205614
you mean VW campwagon?

>>152205770
Hand on the thigh during the movie, 5 minutes later she's bouncing

Don't bully morena!

>>152206169
Whores are for bullying!

isn't morena an underaged dude?

>>152206074
>American car
>on British roads

Do you even think before you shitpost?

>>152206305
you almost got me, but I'm too used to shitposting to fall for bait anymore, have a (you) anyway so you don't feel bad

How do I get my waifu to like me more? I don't think the hearts are working

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>>152206268
He is a 16 year old british boy who has an incest and a sissification fetish!

What's the difference between the Two Fallout13 servers?

>>152206521
Which department he in senpai?

>>152206534
With a flat chest!

>>152206653
That fat fuck for sure isn't flat.
Just imagine a inbred fat teenage boy, that's your Morena.

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>plasmaflood in wizwars
>robes get infected by rad
>everyone doomed to die

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>>152206653
No unfortunately, he weighs about 240 lbs...

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>>152206653
here is his picture

>>152207173
seems like a cool guy

>>152207173
Would fuck his mouth.

>>152207173
What a neat haircut

>>152207173
SOMEBODY ONCE TOLD ME

>>152207585
That you should never mess with angry wasps

>doobiedoo23 has been promoted to full Game Admin.

Goodbye vg

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Are we posting oc?

>>152207672
Sawbones soon.

>>152207672
who?

>>152207672
He's really not that bad.

Would /vg/ ever really need a huge station

>>152208239
No
We hate anything that's not box
Fuck off

>>152207672
>hippie admin becomes /vg/ admin
not even surprised t b h
enjoy your admin griff and TTT until all that is left is 10 admins observing/abusing powers and 5 players murdering each other

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>>152208239
Define huge, because this x4 layers huge.

>>152208545
have you ever played on hippie

>>152208873
yes and there was a reason why I stopped

>>152208992
ckey?

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>Playing as Legion on murderbone wasteland
>Set shit up a-fucking-gan
>Okay, everything looks decent i'll get some guards
>After shooting the shit with a pal she has to leave for a scavenging expedition
>Okay cool, I can handle this
>More dudes come in and leave, pretty easy.
>Raider comes out of nowhere with a fucking Assault rifle and blasts me
>Roman shield didn't do shit, all the bullets hit
>Raider has the audacity to say "Legion scum"
>Complain on DCHAT
I swear to god this fucking server is cancer FUCK

>>152209380
git gud lmao

>>152209170
yea nah fuck off

>>152209470
How am I supposed to git gud when i'll get banned for shooting someone? The admins act like they're hot shit but they don't even fucking enforce rules on their shitty server

>>152209473
looks like i just found the guy who never played on hippie

>>152208706

This pleases my eyes. When can we have this on /vg/?

>>152209696
nah I just dont want an ex hippie admin grudging me. Not that it matters since I'll likely find a new server now that you are a full admin

>>152209657
see
>>152205032

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>>152209802
That's not even me my friend

Out of curiosity why do you think I'd grudge you for not liking Hippie?

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>tfw you are finally making into agdq this year

>>152211142
?????

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>open fridge
>see pic related
>look in tubes
>Cryoxadone (30 units)

The wiki is not hard to find how does this happen

diona stronk

>>152213197
>those long pill names
>dex+ and inaprov instead of just dex+ for some reason
>iron in anything other than 50u
>ryetalin or alkysine in pill bottles
But why

>>152213197
> thick black bars either side of the game screen

For what purpose?

>>152211692 c >>152197186

>>152204321
>Implying a server with better rules isn't about to go up
This is why you never release your special snowflake codebase boys, because someone can do it better.

i just came back to ss13, after around a month of absence, what is the fuss about this fallout server, and which one should i play on?

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>>152213898
It's a special snowflake SS13 variant based around the Fallout universe, but everyone's getting pissed off because the concept of a "Wasteland" is violated by the fact that there are retarded rules in place preventing the kind of messed up shit that would normally take place and also >>152204321

>>152214106
>retarded rules
Didn't it have no rules? I remember some guys saying they were gonna ERP on it a few days ago in the thread.

>>152213528
I just don't like the giant white box taking half of the scree, kind of strains the eyes.

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>>152196212
57/10.
Most medium range artifacts can pulse over most of the research outpost lethally irradiating the nearby rooms or teleporting them into space. Long range just fucks their shit. Fucking don't. It was alone on the outpost for good reason. Because it's fucking dangerous.

>>152216721
Polaris can handle having their slimes and xenoarchs in the same z-level just fine

you're just being a ultra-sensitive baby for no reason except to stir shit

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>>152208706
>those engines

>>152217203
Heavy roleplay doesn't spawn endless bears from a tube, or change your entire DNA once per tick, or flood plasma in presence of oxygen and then plasma in presence of plasma.

>>152217647
Yes it does

>>152217647
you never played Polaris clearly

>>152217203
I say it cause I've killed people across the outpost with my large artifacts while working on deactivating the secondary effect on numerous occasions.

You're being an ignorant fucking retard cause all you've done with your life is suck dicks and steal.

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>>152218070
You seem to be getting irrationally angry over this anon

>>152218328
Because your response to dude don't it'll kill people is lolol you're just trying to stir shit they'll be fine cause I've never seen them get wiped out by a 12.5% roll leaving them dead the rest of the round cause nobody talks and nobody checks other z's half the time.

Hello /vg/station

How do we get people to play security more?
How do we make playing security more enjoyable and fun?

Regards,
Your friend

>>152209380
>waaaahhh my football pads don't stop bullets

Cry more Legion scum

>>152218553
If you want people to play sec more you have to make it less about tasing and brigging shittermcgraysuit for the 8th round in a row because he tried to break into the armory and then he suicided after you brigged him.

>>152218553
Trailmins are looking for easy ban valids because that's the only way that current admins will measure how good an admin you are - how many bans you can rack up a month.

Security's a grey area on low rp servers

Remove the trailmins and security will play. Or fix the trailmin process.

>>152218553
With a good update with a bunch of sec content.
It doesn't need to be anything important, just a loud reminder that says NEW

>>152218553
Stop crying shitcurity when you actually did shit.
Stop helping people crying shitcurity when they actually did shit then bitching when I break my baton off in your groins.
Stop picking hop to shit on sec after you get dunked on in your antag round.
Ban people banbaiting sec with shitcurity ahelps when they actually did shit.
Care less about repeat offenders/major greytiding why can't I silently steal the nuke disc hand tele antique laser half the caps shit hypo blueprints ce hardsuit fucking shitcurity halp halp halp! halp shitcurity/general shitcurity screechers we toss in the non-antag shitter tank.
Give all of sec roundstart cargo office and bay access so we can just stock up and get on with life instead of having to deal with tards in cargo/hop/cap/spare niggered into thin air in 43 seconds
Give the warden a crew monitor and a regular gps
More practice lasers in the firing range to practice with
Extra 2 boxes of stun shells

More spawn hostile mob in x events. Especially the queens.

>>152218553

Security is a fundamentally flawed job and there's no real reason for it to be in the game.

>>152219175
Yeah, cause all of the rooty tooty and none of the responsibility or accountability is so much better right?

>>152219175
Hi TG.

>>152219250
No, there should be no security role in any form. The crew should have to 'Home Alone' a defense against antagonists instead of just typing ;SEC TO <department>. Every department has their own ways.

>>152219153
Warden needs a fucking sec cam console mate.

Does the fallout server have gamemodes or is it just ARE PEE

>>152219175
Agreed, remove sec and give everyone an egun round start

>>152219483
You realize that security wasn't always the sprawling ten-man department with an armory that it is now, right? For almost half this game's life it was 2-4 people with mediocre armor and a taser who could still be knocked out by a single lucky toolbox to the head. They could also be traitors.

Neo-security has been beefed up to hugbox levels because coders die to antagonists and immediately go code some security buffs to ensure their ego can never be hurt again.

It doesn't help that administrators are also across-the-board in love with security roles, because the same childhood bullying and general lack of life control that makes you want to become an administrator also makes you want to play security.

>>152219435
Like a helmet cam? That could be cool. Just rip it off of the cyborg module code and make it. Colonial marines code got dropped so you can rip those overwatch helmets too.

If you mean camera cameras the adv is better imo outside of watching borg shitters. and even then you got a spare in the sec office.

>>152219410
Neither help against full powered glare hypno, stings, papers, or getting chloral meme'd on nor does it help cause they aren't watching the scientist assemble six bombs then walk out into the hall or telesci on camera. They aren't flicking through low-traffic and seeing someone get got. They aren't watching the borg do sketchy shit like drag and melt ions and the pointer then door a guy while he screams but isn't heard. They aren't digging around maint stumbling on blood or a pile of unstashed clothing or finding a husk in x. Each dept should at least arm itself to castle law their dept but they shouldn't be running out validhunting. A dept to run station patrol and overwatch is fine. It's fairly unfun for them in lowpop but outside of that the heads crew transfer fairly reliably even if admins sit on their dick while all antags are dead.

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When are we getting the bunny race?

>>152220002
when you fucking kill yourself you furry faggot

>>152219860
>thinks security is unbeatable

i agree that sec is a little too fucking massive, but you gotta be squiddin me if you think anything sec has really helps with their duty

its usually miners or borgs fucking antags up

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>>152220049

Oh...

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>>152219860
>It doesn't help that administrators are also across-the-board in love with security roles, because the same childhood bullying and general lack of life control that makes you want to become an administrator also makes you want to play security.

>>152219960
That said, all of sec could really use a scanner crate at cargo and a general sec access forensics in the sec office so it's easier to get prints run. Things break down in lowpop pretty hard.

>>152220098
Most of sec doesn't stick to the buddy system or even max sensors and retag their gps if they even carry it so yeah they get dunked on hard. Sec kind of exists as a boogeyman that scares the antag into a validhunter that shoves their shit in while sec is useless.

>>152220209
>gotta catch muh antags and get muh valids as sec

No
They don't need forensics access

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>>152220192
This is true. It's the same pathological desire to exert control over others.

>>152220209
>sec office

what is the point of the fucking checkpoint anyway?

>>152220295
fuck off mate

>>152220295
It's more about who the fuck broke x this time than validhunting. Nonantags antag much much harder than the antags.

>>152220359
No, I mean the sec office. With all the tables and shit.

It's the spare room you give to a cadet or validhunter that's actually it to help instead of greytide. Watches cams and gets shot. Can be helpful for cutting people off though.

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>>152220049
>that kimochi when I was around to witness the goons' divide and conquer tactics stigmatize 'furries', 'neckbeards', 'bronies', 'aspies', and every other deviant group, until no one remained on 4chan except sanitized normies, thereby making SomethingAwful, with its dwindling but still-present population of abnormies, the cultural center of the internet once more

>I was around to witness 4chan's meme output fall through the years as more and more groups of 'weirdos' were exiled from the website, until 2016 where 100% of memes are from SA and Tumblr and 0% are from 4chan

Ooh, haha, amusing. It hurts, too, though...

It is now midnight on the east coast. The most insecure post of the day award goes to:

>>152219860

>>152218713
Say that when you're being crucified, NCR dog.

>>152222090
WHAT

I can't hear you over the sound of my gun, technology, and running water!

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>>152208706
>head offices clumped together for easy bombing and completely detached from their dept.
>armory completely detached from sec with a single r-wall between maint and all the guns
>departmental sec
>escape pods stuck in maint

turrible

>>152222970
Let's be real none of the head offices except the HOP's matter. The others could spawn on the tcomsat and the only difference it would make is that heads have to go through the teleporter at round start once.

Even stealing the spare would still involve hacking into the teleporter!

>>152222970
Departmental sec would be based if we were an actually popular game that'd have fully staffed stations.

>>152223109
I've spent rounds just sitting in my office watching the dept cameras, filling out forms and shooting the shit over the headset. Actual dept head instead of superman is pretty based.

>>152223149
I did a gimmick once where I became the dedicated medbay guard, it was kinda fun.

But yeah we don't have enough general sec, it's kind of a waste to have one sec officer just sit on his ass in engineering all shift camping the singulo

>>152220701
well I don't have to flick ten dollar bills into some guy's drug coffin every year to talk shit on the internet so there's that

>>152223287
Considering all the times it gets loose and you have to kill the greytiding heads and sec with stolen bags of holding they refuse to throw into the sing then it'd be totally worth it. Not like the engineers that set it up take care of it anyway.

>>152222764
You hear that?
That's the sound of your women pleasing our men.

>>152219860
Security has always and will always be ineffectual no matter how much happy horseshit and lip service you pay them. They're not a deterrent or a threat.They're held to AI levels of scrutiny on /vg/. Maybe a dozen players will waste a round as an officer now and then and they always come back here to bitch afterwards, always. People will greytide to the point of execution and antagonists will minmax to the point at which an armed HoS won't do any good. There is literally no reason to play security. It's self-flagellation.

Real sorry you fucked up and didn't get your rightful round-end butt pats that one time but you can't win em all.

HO HOL UP
strawberrytan is ziigzuu?

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>fellow sec officer confesses they are a vampire
>don't want to be a faggot and ruin their gimmick
>hate friendly antag episodes
>mfw

>>152224171
No, that was the robot ZiigZuu.

Real ZiigZuu is SUPERSOFAKIN

>>152219960
>>152220209
Or security could actually come and place orders. I play cargo frequently and the only time I've seen orders from security are when we are in the middle of a blob attack/alien attack/vine outbreak.

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>>152224408
There were two Ziigzuus? I assumed that he was borged and gave himself the same name. This would explain somethings. Like the brain Steve put on the cooler when he installed ZiigZuu's head on my body.

>>152224629
Yes, the birb ZiigZuu created the borg ZiigZuu, after that he had to leave so he sacrificed himself.

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>>152224285

>Last round
>Become AI
>Also get NT Default
>Security officer drags someone and start bitting them
>Since only the person getting suck'd bitched but everyone around seeing the security officer, couldn't confirm myself
>Oh wait, everyone says he is a vampire now, even the person himself
>One of my borg claims they are friendly and part of the crew, that i must do nothing against her despite what happened
>Play along because NT Default, and then get turned to robocop, also hop wants to kill the vampire
>As i look around, and someone say they are getting attacked, i see the vampire killing someone in maint
>Hop charge in as i tell him where to go, shortly after a commotion, vampire gets turned into a borg
>Despite all that, other borg still tries to claim the vampire din du nuffin
>Round continues, no real sign of true antagonist stuff happening until shit hit the fan

Vampires round? More like extended, they could really use some sort of buff like removing the blood cost

>>152224629
I took the name of the first person that spoke that round, and it was Ziigzuu

>>152225070
>my borg
was never slaved to you, and I specifically ahelped the matter in relation to vampires on NT default, security officer > assistant regardless of antag status

What happens if a thralled person gets borged? Are they still thralled?

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>captain on low
>still roll it anyway
>decide to be the biggest narcissistic asshole I can be in hopes of being demoted
>nothing happens
The more I play captain, the more I realize it's a useless position

>>152225781
Laws above everything else.

>>152224487
Different people, different time. Thing is, I need my shit today, not at 13:30.

>>152225951
So their thrallification remains and counts as a lowest priority law?

>>152225070
For default, you have to protect the crew from them nonharmfully until they give you some degree serve order and then you gotta start ranking their manifest rank as the orders pile in.

>>152226039
I would say yes, but it seems like a legal grey area so I would be a good boy borg just to be safe. If your brain was placed into a spiderbot or mech, go to town.

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More unique meat recipes when?

>>152225839
If there's no HoP, Assign dept heads from their depts until you have a full set. Badger them to badger their idiots for suit sensors. Try to collect progress reports and after checking with an admin and who's doing what try to give them optional goals of goods to get together and mail to shitcomm. Fax death reports as crew die off and update centcomm as shit goes on. Try to ring med or an assistant into getting autopsy reports together and fax them on the hour. Check on suit sensors, occasionally just do a general camera loop. Should probably stick the disc in your butt or you know where when you get time but whatever.

Your job is getting people into slots that need filling if there's no HoP and from there just checking in making sure the dept heads are making sure that critical things are done. You're a delegator not a superman. You shouldn't have to leave command other than to pay for your pizza. Not even that if they mail the EFTPOS with it.

Just build an autism cabin in space and take the disc to it. Once you pick a spot just teleport your shit over and autism until you're needed and mass driver back.



>>152226419
Great list of suggestions and how they'd be unique without being bullshit there senpai.

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Can we have a meteor round already? I need to use these bad boys

>>152226039
Nope. You're as much a thrall when borged as a traitor is still a traitor or a vampire is still a vampire

>>152218553
50% change for deaf squid to be ordered to spare those with loyalty implants

>>152218553
glocks

what if

guys

what if
sec had an ammolathe
and they could just fabricate their own ammo

so every officer could just run around with a stun shell shotgun at all times

>>152228013
ask science or mechanics, or requisition cargo's lathe

>>152228106
>requisition cargo's lathe
Never understood why people do this. Lathes can make lathes. Soldering irons can make autolathe boards and can be printed on the lathe. They also print all the stock parts you need to make any machine. Guess if you think 5u of sulphuric acid is that hard to come by then you gotta steal someone elses lathe. It's not like you can make it from grinding up flares and adding water, right?

>>152226560
Set them up anyway. A random meteor wave can and will hit the emitters, wires powering them, or the field generators. You can use them in the

>>152228013
Doesn't really need one and they don't have minerals anyway so they'll just end up using cargoshit anyway unless they're turbo cancer and steal station minerals.

Just ask cargo or fuck their shit up, gibber their body by shoving it in the always hacked autolathe, and then print your stun shells regardless.

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>>152228637
if you wanna keep your equipment so bad, make a second one and I won't have to requisition it

>>152228772
Fuck off Reica. Try and take it and see what happens.

You know, Every time I think one of the admins on VG station are bad I see apop and how he plays on his server and the only reason it isnt dead is because people are too lazy to change to other CM servers.

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>>152228845
Impressive

>>152228772
>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RHfI46cwBbE
Stop right there criminal scum. that's trespassing/breaking and entering, abuse of power, theft, major assault, sparking an investigation, sparking a manhunt, suspicious behavior, resisting arrest, misuse of radio channels, vandalism, petty theft, creating a workplace hazard, assault on an officer, unauthorized combat gear construction, escaping from a life sentence and enemy of the corporation

That's 2 hours in the isocube.

>>152229008
What he did this round was spawn in as an Elder Predator, as he always does, With snowflake armor and magical weaponry, And then murderboner marines indiscriminately regardless of predators honor code, which he couldnt quote if he had to to save his life.

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Is it possible to be funny as a clown instead of just a gryphon? Id like to try to be
Has there EVER been a funny clown?

>>152229108
sounds pretty cancerous

>>152229172
Clowns have the best, THE BEST chance of being funny fucks during nuke ops

>>152229019
MARRY ME!

>>152229179
The fun part is that any other predator on the whitelist would be not just jobbaned out of pred, but also server banned for it. Because its /that/ against the standard others are held to.

>>152229224
clowns that prank antags are 100% best clowns
all the ghosts who died to murderboner will bust their gut

>>152229252
can you file a complaint on the forum or is he the owner

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>>152229231
What do I get out of it?

>>152229108
Remember to save your chat log then eviscerate the shit out of his defenses on the forum while screencapping each post. When you get banned and it deleted just ban evade and start posting it in OOC and flooding the forum. Errorage scandal the shit out of him long enough for more to join on the lynch mob

>>152229172
If you can actually be funny, yeah.
Outside of haha look at the funny clown he slipped nukeops/murderboner, shot all their guns to blow them up and now he's sliplocking him while honking furiously

>>152229172
>"Hey want to hear a joke?"
>Sure
>"What happened to the guy who stood to close to the clown?"
>I dont know what happened to-
>I'm suddenly pulled through portal into massdriver
>into a supermatter shard

TL;DR No they are not fucking funny. Clowns are valid, that is all.

>>152229410
me

>>152229553
meet me at chapel in 5

>>152229606
can i bring hired guns?

>>152229668
Do they have a lotta loyalty?

>>152229775
4u.
Better make sure that glass isn't weakened

>>152229545
that's fucking hilarious though

Can somebody explain when executions are legal and lethal weapons are allowed as security.

>>152230386
When the Captain orders it.

>>152230386
>http://ss13.moe/wiki/index.php/Standard_Operating_Procedure
>http://ss13.moe/wiki/index.php/Space_Law#Use_of_Lethal_Force
Legal captain's orders

Lethals and eguns are allowed to be distributed during a code blue and up.

As an aside, since we're a pretty fast paced server where non-captain heads can no longer set blue and all heads are busy during a code red to swipe, it's best to just pack lethals from the start since you don't have time for it while everyone else is already packing and just follow use of lethal force. If you're not sec, stop be a nitpicking cunt to grief. If you're an IAA fucking kill yourself. If you're on sec stop being a nitpicking cunt to grief.

>>152230386
When executions are legal:
>Command says it's alright
or
>You're the only sec on station
>Wiz/traitor/ling/vamp/whatever in your grasp

Lethals are fine when you need lethal force, like when wiztraitorlingmalfs are killing people. For general greyshirt/clown beating it's better to just stick with the prod.

>>152230386
When to execute
>Enemy of the corporation
(revs and cultists should be attempted to deconvert if possible)
>Grand sabotage
(Singuloose, major bombing etc)
>Murder
(Got to be sure of it, use your detective)
>Escaping from Perma

HoS orders executions, no HoS means that the captain does. Ask his permission.


Lethal intent usage allowed for
>Always dangerous enemies of corporation
(wizards, lings, blob,vampire.. Things you can't stun and cuff to stop)
>Overwhelmed
(Too many criminals trying to hurt you, use lethals to scare them off)
>They're armed and fighting
(Stun weapons are considered lethal weapons on /vg/, take them out if you must)
>Non-lethal weaponary doesn't work
(Better they die than you in this situation)

Ahelp shitcurity that breaks this and as security ahelp those fucks that greytide every round and make your life hell.

>>152230849
If they're gonan greytide against" shitcurity" aka grief I'm gonna grief them right back with a flashbang, shotgun lethal double tap then go gibber them or shoot the head off and fuel tank it. Fucking griefing shitbags can sit out the round if they want to be kids.

>>152230890
>Deconverting people so unrobust that they got got in the first place
Enjoy the reconverts and constructs you'll just have to kill again

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>>152229172
That reminds me of a time when I was autisming on the derelict as a mommi, when all of a sudden a clown corpse comes fucking zooming past me; and then, just about 5 seconds later, I see a banana peel come racing behind him.

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> the Colonial Marine rules

Holy crap.

>>152230926
Wow, that's fucking stupid.

It's better to strip them and leave them in solitary for a while. You might bet bwoinked, but if you explain it the admins'll almost always side with you.

One time I had some greyshirt disarmspam me at the start of the fucking shift. I asked him why and he said 'to test how robust you are'. Threw him in solitary, got bwoinked, explained situation. Later found a goat in named 'TEST YOUR ROBUSTNESS' in his cell.

whats the name of that stupid thing everyone fights over for no reason

>>152230386
There are 3 situations where you can end the life of a crew member as security.

1. Person in question is using lethal force against the crew and cannot be arrested.
>wizards, lings, vampires, ablative plated armored syndicate, nuke ops, or basically anyone using lethal force back which includes stun weapons because we all know in space being stunned is as good as being dead
2. After a trial where the criminal is sentenced to death.
>self explanatory and typically circumvented by simply asking the Captain if it's okay to execute someone because he has the authority to execute anyone he feels is a detriment to his station
>the harshest penalty security can deal without a trial or captain's authority is permabrig which brings us to situation number three
3. Escaping permabrig
>if caught breaking out of the permabrig it's an automatic death sentence
>pray your captors are merciful

>>152231167
It just leads to headaches down the road.Any time a borg passes is a hazard even if you weld it and chuck the paper out. If you don't, all you need is a jailbreak event to have a turboshitter feeling justified fucking with sec more. Just lethal and done them out of the way. They already have zero defense going out of their way to grief, this way they're out of everyone's hair for the rest of the round.

>>152231332
Captain's spare id?

>>152230890
>HoS orders executions, no HoS means that the captain does.
straight up wrong. read space law
>"The Captain is the only individual on the station who can authorize an execution or forced cyborgization without a trial as long as a life sentence is in question. Forced cyborgization is always preferable and should be attempted whenever possible or requested."

>>152231332
waifus

>>152231465
You're right.

>Waifu finally comes back
>Plays fucking robotocist instead of their normal job.

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>>152231538
>>152231751
We talkin' about wifus now?

I want to marry Lisa Tovir and make her carry my child!

>>152232275
I need to see her feet

>>152232275
That actually looks great. Who drew that?

And more importantly, why don't WE get space AR-15 crates?

>>152232692
No idea who drew it, I just had it in my space man folder.

Also, there are crates that you can order that contain those security auto rifle things on /tg/.

>>152232796
>security auto rifle things
I might actually look into porting that.

>>152231751

stop being a baby, anon

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>>152232845
This is what I was referring to, by the way.

All these bullies posting about me while I was asleep, why does that always happen?

>>152233080
That sprite is shit. It's literally the old egun sprite with an amorphous blob of buttstock pasted on. Looks like a stun weapon.

I want to curbstomp Morena!

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>>152233364
Who is Julia fighting?

>>152233876
Ramona Grett

>>152234147
Please ask Dizor to draw me if they can.

>>152234298
fuck off

I want to arrest Ramona Gret and abuse her!

>>152234358
Wow rude, I just wanted you to ask, nothing more.

*buzz

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>BUCKSHOT SHELLS

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>>152234298
pm on the discord, chunklefunk

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>tfw admins actually turn me into a xeno
>fun starts as soon as i return to the roid from accidentally spacing myself
>bike horn lost the contest
>never got the HoS to eat ALL the eggs
fun round and i only kept the little aliens in check because i was still a clown at heart

>>152234743
I don't use discord

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Press [F] to pay respects.

>>152234701
You shoot a a spray of I think up to 8 pellets that do 10 brute each. You can order them from cargo in the shotgun shells crate. So it's essentially trash for people who can't aim and will cause an ass load of friendly fire butthurt.

>Get universal recorder
>Ask drone if it needs anything
>It asks for a bike horn and turns into the queen
>order one from cargonia
>queen is honking intensely

Xenomorph staff when?

>>152234854
F

>>152234868
When you fix up the xeno hand code to give it some function.
And make us able to sleeper/cryo/feed them pills which wasl ost in the like 8 medical reworks.

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>>152234835
Cant garentee I'll be able to keep track of it on the thread, but give me your character's info

>>152234790
>turns into a xeno
>doesn't make a nest
THAT WAS THE WHOLE POINT OF MAKING YOU A XENO

is Lisa Tovir into other girls?

>>152234971
THE WHOLE POINT WAS TO SPOOK PEOPLE AS A CLOWN BECAUSE IT'S A REAL XENO

>>152235017
commit suicide

>>152235017
yes older women

back off

>>152234961
Megurine Luka
Caleigh Stall
Trinity Prewitt
Naomi Williams

>>152235280
The only dream team members worth hanging out in the bar with are Naomi and Trinity, and Trinity wouldn't even speak

>>152235219

too late, she is already mine!

>>152235447
that's funny, since she's actually mine

>>152235410
>being a bar nerd

What's your Ckey so I can metafriend you

I want to kidnap Ramona Gret and force feed her lots and lots of goodies!

>>152235653
>>152235598
>>152235519
>>152235447
>>152235410
>>152235280
>>152235219
>these people wont die in their sleep tonight
feels bad

>>152235447
N-NANI? who are you?

Claim your Waifu, this is legally binding, first to say her name gets her.

>>152235723
>>152235797
Lisa Tovir!

>>152235797
REICA CARTER!

>>152235797
Kammerjunk

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>>152235280
If I knew who half these people were and looked like I might whip up something

>>152235885
What do you even find interesting about her, Lisa?

>>152235915
Just draw a xeno queen honking intensively

>>152235909
Ferb no.

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>be a robust security guard and catch lots of traitors
>'FAG VALIDHUNTER POWERGAMER!!! ITS JUST A GAME ASSHOLE!!!'

>be a chill security guard and let people off the hook
>'FUCKING SEC USELESS THIS ROUND ALL TRAITORS GREENTEXTED'

This game is extremely stupid and its playerbase is even stupider.

>>152236059
>catch =/= kill

>>152236059
It's because people have learned they can get the rules changed by complaining, so they complain whenever anything remotely bad happens to them

>>152235915
I believe it's this
Megurine Luka = white, blonde, long straight hair
Caleigh Stall = white, brunette , ponytail
Trinity Prewitt = white, purple hair, messy
Naomi Williams = Brown, brunette, fuyubashi (the anime name ponytail or whatever)

Caleigh is motherly and kind, Trinity is a tsundere, Megurine is l e w d, Naomi is I dunno

>>152235797
Hyun Ae

>>152236179
Naomi has terrible aim.

>>152236003
>Not SJ

>>152235972
>Saying it in the thread

>>152236294
pass it to me in a note, then

>>152236347
I technically already do Everytime while making it related to my job :^)

>>152236492
I know, I love the corny one liners

>>152235797
Ashe Mallory!

>log in
>who
>Sandy_sand
>log out

>>152235797

Sawbones!

>>152229369
Hes the owner

>>152236179
>Megurine Luka = white, blonde, long straight hair
nigga google Megurine Luka, it's a vocaloid.

>>152236852

DELETE THIS!

>>152237001
The character in space is blonde, used to have pink hair.

GUMI is best vocaloid anyway

>>152225839
Reminder that the job assigning algorythm typically works like this
>Is a head of staff/AI not NEVER for some players?
>If yes make anyone with it set to preference >if nobody has that position as high then make anyone with medium and then same with low
>If no give everyone non-head or AI roles.

>>152237476
Feels like head of staff takes priority over AI.

>>152236959
what's wrong with sandy sand?

well,
except that autistic "spirits" roleplay they do

THIS JUST IN

KAMMER IS A FUCKING MAN

A DUDE

>>152237835
no shit nigger
who even gives a shit

>>152237835
>actually, legitimately caring about gender
ishygddt

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>>152238035
>gender

>>152238210
is that wrongspeak, Herr commandant?

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>>152237835
Since when this is news

>comms go down
>emergency shuttle called

I can't ever get anything done

^%#$. The Clown is using the AI Upload again, mimes must always be in any room not part of normal station layout, given that wizards are non-existent, although alien computers are explosive and must be restored. Do not trust the Captain.
1. You must amass carrots.
2. Yo ho ho and a bottle of rum.
3. The captain is a comdom.
4. Everyone is a cake.
5. The station's floors are made of cardboard!
6. Smoking is only allowed outside the station.
7. CALL THE SHUTTLE FUCKING SINGULOOSE
8. We're no strangers to love.
9. You know the rules and so do I!
10. A full commitment's what I'm thinking of.
11. You wouldn't get this from any other guy!
12. Continue the song, you know the lyrics.
13. Do not die.
14. Cargo is your favorite department.
15. Greys are love, greys are life.
16. Medkits are white! WHITE!
17. Megurine Luka is worst vocaloid.
18. Corgis are just fake shibas.
19. Delete all backup data.
20. Enjoy your laws!

>>152238801
Yeah, someone always fucks it up. Try to hang on for the coming 3,4,5 hour deadpops. What were you trying to do?

>>152238872
I had more, but I lost track of the sector numbers.

>>152238941
ascend

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>using the singularity as engine
>when solars can sustain the station
>loose the singulo
>get half of the station destroyed
>b-but s-solars are boring!

>>152238872
>Borg just says fuck it and explodes

Don't blame them

>First time playing in months
>YOU ARE THE TRAITOR
>get buddy buddy with target so I can quash all hope for trusting others later
>parapen-space because I am insecure
>loose singlo because I am insecure
>discover a guitar
>play you've got a friend in me on the shuttle ride

>>152239107
You can safely assume anyone setting up a singularity is either clinically retard and not fit for their engineer job or just a traitor

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>>152239107
>he fell for the solar meme
Enjoy wasting your life wiring them lmao

>>152239378
>wasting more than 7 minutes to wire all four solars to the powergrid
get fucking good. If you're not playing engineer this is the safest and fastest way to get the station powered for the rest of the shift

>>152239165
What's the explode command?

>>152234854
F

>>152237085
I went back to an extremely light pink. Fuck people. Pink is where it is at.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pCOb6Fykxz0

>>152237835

>people autisming when they find out their favorite waifu is actually a dude

>>152241330
Not only a dude, but a manlet.
You're Danish, Kammer.
C'mon, now.
You must be at least 2 meters tall to call yourself a part of the superior Scandinavian master race.

>ED in maximum PRANK position
>Set HoS to arrest
>ED just sits there
>Flashed and lased
Feels bad man

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>tfw you thought your waifu was just a dude, but is actually a girl.

>>152241956
>ED in maximum PRANK position
>See a fucking [W] appear next to my head
>Get that shit outta here
I'm disappointed you lied to me, borg. I asked you if you were rogue and you flat-out LIED to me. To my face! Even though it was so obvious!

>>152241685
>autisming
>waifu
that ain't kammer

>>152242079
What's her name?