/csgog/ Counter Strike Global Offensive General

;;

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CAPTAIN JEAN LUC PICARD OF THE USS ENTERPIRSE

Fixed:

>How to git gud
Do this EVERYDAY: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SlCRfTmBSGs
Watch this EVERYDAY: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T0Y8PmrzHuI
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NUgKRtAJqwU

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Post your bets.

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Every thread
https://www.strawpoll.me/10454179

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SILVER 3 BOIS

>>145244034
>lets turn a 15 year old shitposter into a meme xD
Maybe go to tumblr?

>post stream highlight
>get tons of upboats
>change link to gay porn
:DDD

>>145244034
lose weight fatty feet are so fat you dont even have arches

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>be bad
>watch anime
>get good
>win

>>145244341
i miss cacti

>>145244341
>be gotard
>watch anime
>anime has pro csgo tips in it
>get good

rrrrr is _____

>>145244509
fat

>>145244509
fat

>>145244509
KAWAII

>>145244509
black

It's been good gog. I've been posting daily for 2 years, but fuck this. This thread is so sad. Enjoy the shitposting.

>>145244672
spotted the fatty

>>145244672
t. rrrrr

>>145244732
what made you post yesterday but make you not want to post today?

>>145244732
bye manlet nerd maybe now youll have sex

>calling people fat and telling them to get laid
Is this really the best we can do?
Come on magog aren't homos supposed to be funny

>>145244970
this manlet cuck is getting salty

>>145244801
I've been posting less and less. For some reason I held on to the idea that this general would get good again and the shitposting would be ignored. Nothing good lasts forever, I guess. I'm probably one of the last regulars to leave, it's definitely not the same people posting here anymore.

>>145245043
I'm a 6ft tall switch with a cute bf that loves me
I enjoy spending time with magog and consider all of you my friends

>>145245135
it's same amount of shitposting as any other general. you're really overblowing it.

>>145245152
you dont have to lie on the internet fatso no one here cares and im not a retard like you to pretend online losers are my friends come back when you have sex

>>145245360
our boy streamin /stichomythia

>>145245135
kys manlet dweeb

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>adult male
>wears shorts in public

god tier
>tactics

good tier
>victory
>guardian elite

aight tier
>inferno
>train

shit map tier
>nuke
>dust 2
>militia
>mirage

nys tier
>militia
>train
>guardian
>italy

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Anyone else entry/igl here?
>enter into mid/site
>either get kills and win the round for the team
>or die and dictate the remainder of the round

>>145246242
Better than me, senpai.

Just installed this yesterday

>>145246419
Post id and location so you can find someone to play with

>>145246838
I don't want to embarrass myself here until I can get a positive k/d in death match.

>>145246242
im both entry and igl
post id and be my bf?

>>145247101
If we both entry/igl will we be compatible?
I need a 2nd to trade effectively...

Best place for teams? CEVO, ESEA, or MLG?

Also add me
Steam: CamrosX (Best Chest of the West) [just a stupid name I thought was funny]

Good smg/eco rush and flanker

>>145246242
Im a dedicated scout+cz/deag player

>>145247219
Whoever gets best spawn goes first, and we can both contribute to the strats and both cuddle :3

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>>145247360
>Good smg/eco rush and flanker
So you're good at things everyone is good at
>mfw I solo que and 3 pubs say they're lurkers

>>145247425
uhh I rifle/deco

>>145247467
Are you sure it won't turn into a dick measuring contest?

>>145247219
>>145247467
lose weight fat boys maybe you wouldnt be so pathertic

>>145247684
>2 people flirting
>pathetic
You poor lonely soul

>>145247589
yeah lets measure dicks but only to see whos top x#

>>145247732
>two fat manlets that dont go outside so they get desperate enough to thirst after other fat dweebs
you poor failure of a human

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ITT

>>145248219
No im cute :3/

why doesnt kujo ever use his power in daimond is unbreakable?

>>145248219
I look nowhere near any of thoose two

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>>145248654
Spotted the fatty

>>145249049
Ok I will let you touch my dick... But only if you're being soft >_<

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Im looking for the name of an old map from CS source. It was a very pretty fantasy city. In the skybox their was a bay and balloons in the air, and in the map there was a museum, caffe, and some other things I cant remember.

>>145249385
can you even see your dick fat boy

>>145249580
Noooo~ that's so hard dont~ kyaaaa

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>>145249736
fatty having a breakdown

>>145249994
Oniichan~ thsats the wrong hole uuuuuuu

>>145249385
tfw we wont play with our dicks together
Yours being soft and little and mine being hard and big like it is

>>145249542
bls respond

>>145250709
sup

>>145251134
ty anon

>>145249994
fucking disgusting

>>145245934
ok now do one for genuine pins

>>145243940
Make it so

>>145255006
The first duty of every Starfleet officer is to the truth, whether it's scientific truth or historical truth or personal truth

I havent been on csgog in a month or so whats fresh

>>145256823
nothing

it's dead

>>145256823
everyone moved on to overwatch

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>>145257548
I play both though!

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hey csgog why arent you getting idiots vac banned in ur spare time

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=65kvimoefQ4

>be smfc
>queue against cheaters because prime is taking 9 billion years as per usual with valve
>now a low elo lem
>getting paired with eagles and dmgs
>no one making callouts or listening to strats i call, lose even more
>people dicking around baiting each other instead of pushing out onto sites
>smoke clears by the time they do push onto site
>i always entry because in my mind i am expecting my team to actually know how to take a site
>get mowed down while entryfragging while team baits me
>team then proceeds to bitch me out for having shitty KDR when i'm entrying every round and doing 80 damage every time i push site
wake me up inside CAN'T WAKE UP

>>145261267
just play esea

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loadouts? post + rate :3

1/2

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>>145261705
2/2

>>145259963
Weirdo and how is it a silly game? OW is good

>>145257548
>game peaks at like 1m players
>every moved 2 fagwatch

>>145261953
neck yourself

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>>145262681
Kys yourself my dude

>>145262749
dunk yourself you waste of oxygen

>>145262904
Drown in acid you cuck

>not watching the grand finals of the dotard major

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>dead thread

kek pyth got kicked out of an mm match bc of fucking russians

>>145263453
watch my cock slide in and out of your asspussy dotgay

our guys are winning

dope 360 no scope

this game is dead... is it finally time to move onto overwatch?

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are we going to watch e3 together magog?

>>145264782
I'll watch with you :3

>pro game
>dualies

ROFL

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>>145264701
People are just watching dota finals you, goob

>>145265252
>you comma doob

Nah, you're the doob, doob.

>>145265341
Cant smoke me senpai

China is choking again.

>>145265548
Tyloo has shit T sides.

Maybe these chinks would play better if they lowered their mouse sensitivity.

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>CN CS

>>145265450
smoke my dick faglord

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FUCKING CHINKS GO KILL YOURSELVES.

>12-3 half time

Another game ruined by OP awp -_-

tyloo is so shit

this is why tyloo are my favorite team, i get a fucking heart attack every time i watch them

FUCKING FINALLY

OUR CHINKS

fucking hell this will be the last time Ill bet on Tyloo matches

>>145266392
they're so exciting to watch every time

and sometimes they make really impressive plays like mo's flick in mid

tyloo should start as t side then fuck them up when it comes to ct

>thoses Splyce faces
mad af

These Chinese interviews are always so awkward.

>>145266552
not as awkward when sadokist was interviewing players in korea

>>145264762
why

>>145266789
CHN CS

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csgo

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>csgo match analysis
This is cringe

Does anyone know how to watch the E-league finals while in Britain?

>>145267834
watch tbs

>>145267794
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UVakOi6wcX4

>>145267893
Is that available in Britain?

idk man if cheating was allowed immortals and danish teams wouldn't have problem

>>145267946
why the fuck does everything have to be about britain why do you think you're so fucking important kys

>>145268163
Because they used to be a huge empire and cant handle being absolutely irrelevant now

>>145267946
dont think so. there is prob a mirror somewhere. you can watch the game on twitch but you wont see the crowd or replays.

>>145268269
Yeah, Ive been watching the matches on twitch but it really isnt the same.

i just want rng to lose so these stickers skyrocket.

They need to stop doing co-op missons

shit took me weeks to find retards who don't die to bots

Will we ever see Dignitas holos again?

>>145268669
those bots are nutty man

digniggers

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Giving away dead by daylight betakeys, post your id pls

>losing against RNG

um??????

>cajumb toggling again

>>145268904
messaged you on steam

>>145269245
fart on me

>>145269194
>didn't post steamid
>messaged you on steam
????

>>145268904
I only want your friendship though

>MSL AWP

>>145269902
I will remove you after sending the key

our girl keep roasting MSL lmao this guy career is over

>renegade loses
>ez win for tyloo

>8/2 memegades
>cajunb starts toggling
>our guys lose 16/12

>8-2
>I go high on Renegades
>They immediately lose anti-eco and fall apart
JUST

fucking togglers

>THE DANES
>rubino is norweigan

guys my gf doesn't want me posting on csgog what do I do

>>145270856
get tyrone to set her straight

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>always rooting for the winning team
>never disappointed

feels good man

why do the favelas yell so much

>>145272551
low iq species, same reason south america and africa are shitholes

>>145270856

bring out the bull Johan

favelas without cheats kek

>>145270856
>gf
I hope that was a typo

Siztra is my boyfriend

>that cringeworthy paid crowd

holy fucking shit

pro cs is so fucking boring to watch
>sneak around for almost two minutes
>then everyone dies in ten seconds

>>145275043
?? fast coordinated executes are great to watch

I hate it when someone gets picked early on and it just becomes a split terrorist team getting picked off

happens all the time watching inferno games or mirage

will the favelas get beheaded when they get back home?

Thank fucking god immortals get fucked out of another major. There isn't room for two cheating br shits

>>145273984
lose weight fatso

>>145275690
only if you help me to

Let's frag some noobs tonight!

>>145275896
Yes! :)

>>145275896
Ok I'm in, lets do it.

>>145275716
help yourself ya manlet dweeb

oscar or oscar?

>>145275896
can I join?
>>145276087
meanie

>>145275896
try losing weight fatty

>>145276154
oskar

is it true that CLG are picking up jks and koosta and that Liquid are taking jdm?

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>>145277351
wow liquid is insane, killing CLG and Renegades in just two roster swaps

>>145277551
no idea if it's true or not just rumours I've heard, I still think that Liquid will never do as well as they did at columbus ever again in their career, they got super lucky by getting dust2 against fnatic and then playing CLG in playoffs

just lost a game 12-16 lads and my bf isn't here so I can rage fuck him. What should I do?

>>145277773
lose weight fat boy

>>145277929
I'm well trained and 150 lbs you sad fat fuck.

>>145278049
yeah sure whatever you say chubbs

optic aim are insane wtf

>jumping ak headshot
that could have been a cool round

my gf is coming over in an hour and thirty minutes :)

desu the usp and glock should have the same running speed as knife

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where were you when cheating favelas got knocked out by comrade worldedit

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>two CTs holding B
>kill no one
>do no more than like 15 damage total
jesus christ optic please

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>it's another "team sucks at t side" episode script

>>145279018
she has to finish off jroc first

HR is choking again.

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>>145279461
?

we should get a /csgog/ quake live server

M 1 X W E L L

>>145279575
you should lose weight fatty

>buy
>lose
>eco
>win

um?????

>lelraisers

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>tfw optic stickers

>>145280219
game is trash and it took you this long to realize it retard

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>our guys have to face either EnVyUs, FlipSid3, dignitas, HellRaisers or Gambit

i'm very worried

>>145276326
well, you've fucked me

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>>145280761

>implying c9 will beat envyus

lmfao

are tomorrow's qualifier matches going to be best of 3?

>>145280827
what!?

>>145281963
wrong oscar m80

>>145281923

its bo1 all the way through

>>145282020
well i never said there was one os[k/c]ar...

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>devil
They've already lost the mental game

>>145281923
they're all today m8

>>145281923
There are no qualifiers tomorrow.

playing quake live right now and it's the dumbest shit ever

hey guys check out our general and post there to let us know what you think :D

>>145253641

>>145283781
check us out too lol!
>>145276562

>>145283781
the only game deader than ours......

>>145283662
try reflex. it's way better.

>>145283998
>39 players

lmaoooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

>>145283998
>play reflex
>implying you can

>>145283662
how underaged are you?

>tfw stoaga didn't survive the gay shooting in Orlando

>>145284317
thank god

>happy switching to a pistols as a duel starts
has there been a greater shitter that Happy?

>wash mousepad
>use it for a day
>already dirty

>>145284492
wash your hands, retard.

>>145284492
>wash bf
>use him for a day
>already dirty

>>145284605
My hand is on the mouse though, retard???????????????????????????

>tfw can't decide what food to order

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>half of /csgog/ killed by one fucking muslim
how???

>>145284730
chinese and bet on tyloo

>>145280761
I hope EnVy wins so TyLoo won't have to play them.

>>145284665
when your dirty ass hands get sweaty, the dirt drips on to the mouse and, from there, drip on to the mousepad. every time you do one of your ebin flix xD you smear the dirt all over your mousepad, you fucking ape.

>>145285171
My mousepad doesn't get dirty in the middle where I keep my mouse most of the time though, retard???

>>145280761
they could literally take any of them, envy might be pretty bad for them though

>>145285338
TyLoo chokes hard on T side.

>>145285338
they almost got beaten by fucking Splyce this morning

i'm a pretty big Tyloo fanboy but i'm not going to get my hopes up

>>145285332
>where I keep my mouse most of the time
evidently, you dont

>>145284828
No good chinese near me, got fucking subway, because I got a coupon. Fuck my life subway is so shit.

>>145284761
that's not funny..

>>145285517
But I wash my hands all the time and the mousepad only gets dirty at the bottom part where I never flick?????????????

>>145285523
i say the same thing every time i get subway i dont know why i ever do

>>145285632
>I wash my hands all the time
evidently, you dont
>the mousepad only gets dirty at the bottom part where I never flick
you must have a sloped desk

>>145285825
It gets dirty where I brush my forearm, retard. Even though I shower everyday.

>>145285649
>subway just calls me
>ey bruh, we aint got no bread, wanna have your sandwiches made with tortillas instead
>uhhhh, s-sure

Fucking subway god mother fucking damn it.

>>145285974
prob dead/dry skin? how hard you flickin.

>>145286245
>subway
>no bread
>tortillas

What the fuck?

>>145284230
>spawn with a pea shooter
>die as soon as i spawn because i can't fight back with a gun that does no damage
>most of the game is running around looking for a weapon
>QUAD DAMAGE

>stewie and ska during that retake
holy shit lmao
"pros"

>>145285974
>It gets dirty where I brush my forearm
damn you're dirtier than i thought
>I shower everyday
try scrubbing and using soap ;)

>>145286312

"millenials" everybody

>>145286301
I literally don't know. Like LITERALLY no idea what the fuck they're talking about. They just said they're out of bread.

>>145286553
he's right tho. they should have left the loadouts in.

>>145286568
What country?

>>145286720
Third world.

>>145286824
USA?

>>145286870
No, Eastern Europe.

>TyLoo qualifies
>has to pull out because of visa issues

Screenshot this post.

Let's frag some noobs tonight!

Is the stream being a laggy piece of ass for anyone else?

>>145287414
get livestreamer

>>145287390
>fragging noobs
>on the most holy day of the week
uhhh gotards?!?!

>>145287450
But I am using it.

I hope Gambit wins to give TyLoo a bigger chance of qualifying.

>>145287390

Yes! :)

Why does twitch users censor the SEX GOD meme?

GOD WHY IS THIS STREAM SO FUCKING LAGGY FUCK OFF

>>145289124
Turn off chat, retard.

>>145289124
Turn off cheat, retard.

>rapeking

MORE LIKE RAPEDKING LMAO

>>145289264
I'm using livestreamer, you filthy double nigger.

>>145289513
Get better internet, double retard. Get a brain too.

god fucking damn the trade restriction on freshly purchased skins
this would've been such an easy 3:1

>>145289621
I have the best internet in the world, double nigger. And a better brain than yours.

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g-guys..

G2 16-1d again?

>>145280761
pray4hellraisers ?

>>145289697
Obviously not.

Kill yourself.

Has Dosia fucked Pansy?

>>145289729
>didn't bet on the ez dendd match
>instead went for the risky bo1

????

>>145289881
Go to a gay bar and get yourself shot.

>>145290010
everyone in the pro scene has fucked pansy
what do you think she's there for?

>>145290010
he has fucked every women on earth.
so, yes.

cucksia
cucku
cuckren
cuckze
cuckch

>>145290408
this is not a good meme stop it right nOW!11!

>they doubted the double awp and pistols strat

>>145290408
b-but gambit are our guys!

why does a chinese stream have twice as many viewers as the english one

>>145291476
bots

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How do I work on my aim and reflexes

I want to enjoy this game so badly and when I'm doing well it's great but I die so much and it feels like whenever I get into a 1v1 with someone they always can snap to my head and kill me first

I have 95 hours in the game too

>>145291476
where's the chinese stream?

>>145291476
English one is a laggy piece of trash.

>>145291538

hit the dms dad

>>145291538
Work out, practice CS, drink caffine in moderation, stop drinking/doing drugs besides nicotine, and eat well (protien)

>>145291538
>I have 95 hours in the game

well, there's your problem, friend.
just play more dm (pistol, hs only, ffa, aim maps etc.)

>>145291538
>95 hours
Missed this part. Learn crisshair placement.

>it's a we have lots of money after the save so next round we have 3 awps suddenly episode

>>145291476
some of it is viewbotting, but there's a lot of chinese Tyloo fans too

ez 250k+ extra viewers for the major if they qualify

>>145291668
>caffine
>nicotine

lmao

>>145291858
>viewbotting

For what purpose?

EZ SKINES

SEX GOD

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BASED GAMBIT

>HellRaisers vs FlipSid3 (http://www.hltv.org/match/2303043-hellraisers-flipsid3-esl-one-cologne-2016-main-qualifier)
>Tyloo vs dignitas (http://www.hltv.org/match/2303044-tyloo-dignitas-esl-one-cologne-2016-main-qualifier)
>Cloud9 vs G2 (http://www.hltv.org/match/2303045-cloud9-g2-esl-one-cologne-2016-main-qualifier)

fuck you i'm never betting on g2 skins I lost my only knife

reminder that ESEA forced 50 is real and the only way to break it is to literally hack like kevins aka notKoin

>>145292505
i want f3 knocked hr out so i can see bondik commit sudoku

>>145292523
haha thanks for the knife mate

>tyloo vs dignitas

rip our guys

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>>145292505

>yfw flipsid3 dunks bondik and steps over top of him to make the major again

>>145292679
lmao'ing rn
http://www.hltv.org/match/2303022-dignitas-empire-esl-one-cologne-2016-main-qualifier

http://www.hltv.org/match/2303030-dignitas-hellraisers-esl-one-cologne-2016-main-qualifier

http://www.hltv.org/match/2303038-dignitas-renegades-esl-one-cologne-2016-main-qualifier

>>145292783
TyLoo hasn't done much better.

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>>145292734
>yfw s1mple bullies koosta into retiring

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Hello, my friends.

>>145293292
>317 wins
thats not verr gud my frined

TyLoo's got this, right?

>>145293292

even when derank smurfing i cant get my rank that low.

>>145293292
necc urself mi friend

>>145293292
wanna do lewd?

I hope:
C9
Tyloo
HR
Are the major boys :D

>>145293292
hello

>>145294014
lose weight ya fat slob

>>145294035
I like tyloo but maybe not getting the win tomorrow...

tfw hungover at work with only HLTV scorebot

>>145294375
>tomorrow
It's in like 5 minutes

>>145294375
>tomorrow

Retard.

Cobble Strike: Stone Offensive

>>145294749
More like Cobble Strike: B-site Offensive

RIP TyLoo

Rotations on cobble are so shit.

Shit map

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tyloo can make it guys do not lose hope!!!!

Monkey??

Fucking mo throwing the game.

>>145295016
whats in that sticker capsule though?

TyLooL

>>145295016
16-0 tyloo

dignitas will ignore the script

Guys, I'm crying right now.

TyLoo won't make it.

>be TyLoo
>have bad T sides
>doesn't ban Cobble which is a T map

??????????????????

>>145295743
They beat LG on it so they think it's a top map for them.

tyloo? lmao more like dont tie, lose rolf

>>145295838
they beat Liquid on it, Luminosity was Cache/Overpass/Inferno

lmao fat chink

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>they doubted dignigs

>come up from behind
>still lose

Why the f*ck is it cobble like at least 50% of the games ?

Is TyLoo throwing for skins?

I dont think our guys got this

>our guys will never make it to a major

>>145296702
i'd say they have a good shot at the next one as long as it isn't in NA

>>145296770
Are we watching the same game?

>our guys don't make it
>lose to males who wear shorts in public

Its /csgog/'s worst nightmare

>>145296915
a lot can change in ~4 months

>>145295875
why did no one like my joke :c

>>145297231
who care..

>>145297000
literally crying rn

not even trips and helix videos can make me feel better

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fucking danish pieces of shit they should all get injected with aids poz blood look at that prick fucking autist turkish rubino what kind of a fucking faggot name is that i hope he fucking dies he even has an earring what a fucking homo nigger jesus fuck

>>145297231
have sex

>>145297298
>>145297397
what the heck guys D:

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Am I finally not shit? Started as Silver elite

This is the last time I have faith in poo TyLoo.

>>145297552
kys

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>>145297682

>16:10

>>145297682
>Am I finally not shit?

until you reach rank S in ESEA, you are shit

>>145297892
idk mang, I like 4:3 but I have issues for aiming at distances. Like this I feel way more confortable

>smartphones by their desks

dignitas confirmed for cheats

I'm going to kill myself.

>>145298281
are you going to stream it?

Tyloo should move to EU or some shit

hard to improve when the only actual competition in your region is >>145266110

Is TyLoo the best team China has to offer?

who's here ready for bondik btfo by F3?

lel everyone got teary eyed

the host was really struggling to keep his composure

>>145298281
you're going to get in my bed and cuddle is what you're gonna do

i just ranked up :3

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it's been fun, lads. someone tighten my noose.