Apparently some journalists who have been sent review copies

Fuck reviewers , let it release it in state and it will become dark souls of platformers

Is this the Dark Souls of retro shit sidescrollers?

>>389169542
Nah, reviewers will just praise its difficulty and call it the Dark Souls of platformers.

has anyone said "dark souls of platformers" yet

>>389170017
The guy who didn't almost get through tutorial said something like "mario meets dark souls" in one of his tweets if I remember correctly

>>389169542
I can almost see the opposite effect happening. People will complain that it's too easy because they were let to believe that it was "the dark souls equivalent" by shitty news outlets. People will complain, and the'll release a patch with an even higher difficulty.

>game is going for an old school vibe
>Plays like an old school side scrolling shooter
>Oh mommy, it's too hard
>Le Dark Souls of platformers

G-guys, please, I'm gonna buy your game.
I already wanted to buy it last year.

Please, stop shilling, I'm imploring you.

>>389169542

I already feel like this game is goin to be underrated after all the early hate.

>>389169542
So fucking what? It was always known that "game journalist" are the biggest scum of game industry together with "let's players"

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>>389169542
>Scalebound died for this pretentious wankfest
Kill me.

>>389170332
It's not unusual for video game journalists to be bad at video games or to spend five minutes with it and base their opinion on that.

>>389170592
>Cuphead
>Pretentious
You shouldn't use words if you don't know what they mean.

Post the video or webm of that incompetent fuck who got stuck in the tutorial.

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>>389170732
>mfw I can already hear people saying that unironically

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>>389170783

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>>389170703
>Muh retro cartoon style graphics while having barely having idea about gameplay concepts.
Kill me, i just don't care at this point.

>>389170732
Bro chill the fuck out

It's true. I'm playing it right now. Now I'm no slouch at video games - just the other day I beat Life is Strange - but this game is hard.

>>389170783
I think it's the same guy who spent almost 30 mins on the first level before giving up.

IGN journalist also said that they barely beat the first level kek

>>389170732
Making it through this post was literally the Dark Souls of reading internet forum posts.

>>389169542
Don't some games these days give reviewers piss easy version? There was some fps where enemies in the review build did half the normal damage iirc. Could do something like that so polygon can beat it

>>389170943
It's a run and gun, a game genre that has been around for years. Clearly more years than you've been alive.

>>389170932
original video

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=848Y1Uu5Htk

>>389169542
>missed the literal first jump in the game 23 times

>>389170932
Much appreciated. That was painful.

>>389170932
Who is this? This is amazing

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Okay, look, I get that you basically put yourselves in the poor house developing this game and you desperately need it to be a big success to put your lives back on track, but please, enough shilling.

this game will only be fun with a friend difficulty aside
tell me it has online co op

>>389171146
>>389170932
Is this what being triggered feels like? I am in PHYSICAL and MENTAL anguish right now

>>389169542
>s are struggling to get past the first level.
Why are they even allowed to do a review?

>>389169542
It will get fucking eviscerated in reviews, see: Rain World

>>389170943
That's not being pretentious you absolute mouth-breathing Amerifat

Makes me think of Metal Slug, I'm sold.

"I didn’t realize for quite a long time that you don’t accomplish anything by jumping on top of an enemy, like in the Mario games. Rather, you lose a life."

Something something definition of insanity.

>>389169542
stop trying to make that video into a meme

i'm still trying to forget

>>389171243
And we have 26 days left...

>>389171271
It doesn't, believe it not. Only local co-op. Seems like a really dumb decision to me.

>>389170732
>sex is the dark souls of life
only for men tho

>>389171101
And there's a reason why they were only popular during the NES era, when gameplay in general hadn't been fleshed out, yet.

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>Crash NSane Trilogy comes out
>"The Dark Souls of platformers"
>Sonic Mania comes out
>"The Dark Souls of Sonic games"
>Cuphead will finally come out
>"The Dark Souls of Contra"

When will this meme end? Why are these people so bad? Did they not play any video games at all before they started writing about them?

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>>389171565

>>389171271
Not at launch. It will be implemented in the future.

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>>389169542
>difficulty too high
>no allowed in 2017
>we'll never have difficulty from 80s/90s ever again...

Anything difficult that isn't "Soulsian" reviewers hate.

Patrick Klepkek coined that term btw

>>389170732
"Dark Souls of" is the new "like Skyrim with".

>>389171669
Did the devs actually say that or are you just speculating?

>>389171589
>>>/r9k/
Because women don't have to do anything to get sex, huh?

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>>389171146

But the game looks laughably easy from gameplay videos to the point where I'm not even sure if I want to play it anymore.

>>389171146
From his article:
>Of course, I expect the final game to have a lot more emphasis on gameplay over story, as the designers of the game — Chad and Jared Moldenhauer — are known for that style with their previous game, Super Meat Boy, from 2010.

>>389171787
I clearly remember they said that, probably on twitter or an interview.

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wow....so hard

>>389171665
Just feels like they consider namedropping one of the more notorious games in recent history a fail proof way of getting views. It's essentially a clickbaiting technique.

>>389171665
>Did they not play any video games at all before they started writing about them?

No, most game journos are failed english/journalism majors who only have a passive knowledge of games

>>389170732
My dick is the dark souls of my boxers. Get it? Because it's so hard, haha...

>>389171665
Wait, I've been off the internet for a few weeks,
Did people really complain about Sonic Mania's difficulty, that game was piss easy.

>>389170732
How did this shit even start? I don't ever remember this "the Dark Souls of ______" when Dark Souls was at its most relevant, it seems so recent to me.

>>389172012
My dick is the Dark Souls of penises because no one has ever beat it (except me)
H-haha

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>>389169829
Didn´t work for Donkey Kong

>>389172063

they all got stuck on oil ocean act 2

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>>389170932

>>389171973
Who's playing, a retarded gibbon?

>>389170943
This isn't what pretentious means.

>>389170017
Super Meatboy has

>>389169708
I thought this game was a boss rush not level based

>>389171565
>>389171667
Online coop will be added later according to twitter.

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>>389170932

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Guess we'd better add "Dark Souls of Run & Gun games" the the list.

>>389172357
It was originally a boss rush, then people complained about it only being a boss rush, so they added actual levels to it as well, thus the delay.

>>389171973
>playing on easy & Normal mode
LMAO

To be fair to games journalists I guess if you have to review 3 or 4 different games that month, as well as likely play a game or 2 of your own choosing in your free time, you don't really have the time to gitgud for any of them.

>>389172401
>Dragon's Dogma - The Dark Souls of Fantasy RPGs

You know, I always thought Dark Souls was the Dark Souls of Fantasy RPGs.

>>389172401
>(not the beer)
Who thinks that way

>>389170932
To be fair, the tutorial isn't intuitive at all. I have a legitimate 136 WAIS-IV IQ, and it took me 1 minute to figure out that you had to jump and dash. He was probably overcomplicating in his head, like I was.

That's one of the major faults of being intelligent.

>>389172430
That's gay I was hyped for the shadow of the colossus of platformers

>>389172456
Sure, but when the gameplay mechanics are presented clearly to the player as is the case in this tutorial and when so many games share similar mechanics, they should be able to play it at a competent level at the very least.

It's like that Polygon Doom video. I don't expect him to be a master of the gameplay in however long he had to play it, but I do at the least expect him to be able to fucking shoot straight.

>>389171824
It astounds me that someone can have a job where playing video games is an integral part of the job and still be as terrible at games as someone who literally never touched a video game before.
Did he somehow manage to cover video games for 18 years without ever playing one?

>>389172597
Well sucks for you, Now its the Dark Souls of the Megaman of the Contra of Run N' Gun Platformers

>>389172551
I only wish people with over 110 IQ were game reviewers and journalists

>>389172551
:)

>>389170017
Crash remake

>>389172686
It's called aging.

Why is /v/ so absolutely inept?

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>>389172401
>SMTIV
>The Dark Souls of """"""""""""""Persona""""""""""""""" Games

>>389172158
Dark Souls 2

>Apparently some journalists who have been sent review copies of this are struggling to get past the first level.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=848Y1Uu5Htk
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=848Y1Uu5Htk
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=848Y1Uu5Htk
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=848Y1Uu5Htk
REMINDER: THESE ARE THE PEOPLE THAT GET PAID TO REVIEW VIDEO GAMES.

>>389170932
Imagine being a 'game journalist' and have never played a Megaman game

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>>389169542
Fuck emasculated deranged degenerate libshit commie sjw lgbt femen nu-male cuck millenials, especially their "journalists" lot up the ass without lube with a barbwired baseball bat.
They are the true subhumans and the generation that killed and destroyed the west. God damn special snowflake fruitfaggots.
They all need to be holocausted to the very last one of them.

Kuchera and his buttfuck buddies from Kotaku, Rock Paper Shotgun writing for the gaming "press" are just destructive, mentally ill fucks:

http://crime.about.com/od/serial/a/psychopaths.htm

http://www.wikihow.com/Identify-a-Psychopath

Now compare how many of those points apply to each one of those
TL;DR video game "journalists" are legit psychopaths who need to be systematically publicly executed.

>>389172870
Kek

>>389172551
Why do people lie about having IQs in the high 130s? It's not very smart. Mine is in the 140s, and I still feel average. Most of my friends fall in the 140-160 range, anyway.

>>389172551
>Lets try the same thing over and over again and not bother reading the tutorial text

DAILY REMINDER HE IS GETTING TRIGGERED ON HIS TWITTER OVER THIS

https://twitter.com/deantak/status/904145596323217408

>>389172551
>tfw to intelligent to suceed

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>>389172401
>mfw

>>389172793
This >>389170932 is not called aging. This is called "first time playing video games and extraordinarily bad at it" alternatively if you've been playing video games for 18 years it's called "degenerative demenia in its final stages".

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>>389173084
>You are correct. It is somewhere between Mario and Dark Souls
WHAT DOES THIS EVEN MEAN

>>389169542

Why does he just fucking walk into them? Why does he jumps on them? Why does he apparently think he has double jump?

Fucking hell, I'm actually triggered.

>>389172969
Why do people lie about having IQs in the high 140s? It's not very smart. Mine is in the 180s, and I still feel average. Most of my friends fall in the 240-260 range, anyway.

>>389172551
honey you are dumb as fuck.

>>389172551
You are not smart, (You) are an average brainlet with mental problems.

>>389173227
Cuphead is a platformer like Mario

Cuphead is hard like Dark Souls

Therefore it's Mario meets Dark Souls

>>389173231
the same reason he keeps jumping on the enemy heads when it is clearly causing him damage and proving that he shouldn't do that

>>389172551
It has nothing to do with that. People who don't play vidya (or in this case no platformers) lack the ability to come up with seemingly obvious solutions to overcome obstacles. You could be the smartest person in the world and suck total ass and binding your shoelaces, that's not unusual.

The problem at hand is that the person who provided that gameplay footage is a game journalist. You'd expect these people to be at the very least competent enough to pass this simple tutorial with flying colours, yet they keep struggling for almost a minute.

>>389173084
H U M A N K I N D N E S S
U
M
A
N
K
I
N
D
N
E
S
S

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THE MADMAN ACTUALLY DID IT!!!!

>>389172401
>dragon's dogma is hard
uhhhhhh no?

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>>389169542
This happened with Evoland II.

thank goodness i beat it before it was nerfed

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>>389169708
>dark souls of

>>389171815
They have to do considerably less than men

>>389173731
God i hate the gaming journalism industry

>>389172551
10/10 bait anon

people will actually buy a platforming indie on anything other than mobile? Just as weird as sonic mania...
only worth it to buy these games on a switch.

>>389172551
7/10. Quality troll, you've got serious potential. Keep practicing and maybe some day you'll be at the big boy's table. Peace.

>>389174174
Except Mania was an actually good and enjoyable game. This looks like an uninspired game with boring platforming "levels" to stfu autismos who complained about the game being boss rush only, and the bosses themselves don't look that fun or great either. If I wanted to play a good boss rush game I'd rather emulate Alien Soldier.

>>389174409
>>389174087
Stop replying to me

>>389173084
His excuse is that the game didnt TELL him to jump from the small block to get over the tall block

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Hello fellow bros, we are true GAMERS like you.
You know which game we are really hyped for? Cuphead!
The Game is an amazing 2D run n' gun with beautiful hand-drawn animation, classic gamepplay and 30 challenging bosses!
And you knew you can pre-order it on Xbox One, Steam, GOG and Windows 10, for the ridicolous price of 20$?
We heard that the special edition with the amazing soundtrack is on sale too!

>>389174494
bumping you up to 8/10 for that comment

>>389172904
I don't think there is a single game or game series that game journalists absolutely must have played in order to do their job. They just need to be competent and knowledgeable on the genres that they cover.

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>>389170732
>mfw I eat/do all 3.
A-am I the Dark Souls of 4chan browsers?

>>389174430
I've been looking forward to this game but I think the platforming levels are totally useless

Should've stayed as a boss rush. People who complained about no "normal" levels are retarded

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>>389171146

>>389173393
The "Dark souls is hard" -meme should die

>>389171634
Fuck you.

>>389172184
The fuck? Oil Ocean is tedious, Not hard.

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>>389173084

>human kindness
why is he so fixed on saying this so much?

>>389172401
What is the dark souls of anal sex?

>>389175078
Act 2 boss. Even though it's piss easy with Super transformation.

>>389175365
He's playing victim it's what liberals do when faced with criticism.

>>389170932
This guy has never played megaman x.

>>389175365
Because there is no actual defense for his play, so all he has to fall back on are that the people getting at him about it are being mean.

For being asian he sure sucks at videogames

>>389169542
>style over substance game
yawn

>>389169542
They could probably make a lot of money if they position it as the dark souls of side scrollers

>>389172551
>it took me 1 minutes to figure out that I was supposed to do what the words on the screen were telling me to do

Switch edition when?

>>389172551
>has 136 IQ
>can't jump and dash
Maybe you were scammed with that IQ test

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>>389175365
I feel like this nigga is some sort of troll

>>389172063

Bosses are road blocks for a lot of people. One guy couldn't beat the Puyo Puyo boss despite it being designed to kill itself. The Flying Battery Zone 2 boss was another barrier, some people don't know how to do Hydrocity bosses properly, and Oil Ocean Act 2 boss pretty much ended runs. If they even managed to get to Titanic Monarch, they end up time overing.

It's a new world anon. We're just the old guard watching it crumble.

>>389176652
Is this the result of Japanese schooling where rote memorization is drilled into their head instead of teaching kids the tools required for problem solving?

>>389169542
Does it bother anyone that the character doesn't seem to have much weight? It seems like you move halfway up the screen whenever you jump, looks like it doesn't feel tight at all

>>389176652
How can one person be THIS fucking dumb?

>>389177771
>looks like it doesn't feel tight at all
I'm not supposed to fuck him so I don't care, I'm just trying to keep going and fight enemies.

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this thread lacks of human kindness

>>389169542
Based journos, normies will probably think it's shit and it'll bomb, fucking nice

>>389171146
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l59MaLXJ2-Q
Here's that condensed into 6 minutes

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>>389172551

>>389172430
And the sidescrolling gameplay looks barren and piss easy so far

>>389176872
Only one I struggled with was the Stardust Speedway MechaSonic. And that only took me two tries. I figured out you bounced the mini RoboSonics into him, but I died before I could hit him enough.

>>389177771
>looks like it doesn't feel tight at all
i guess you're going to have to wait and play it to find out how you "feel"

>>389173920
So you didn't get that it was a joke?

>>389170271
This is the people who tell others what to think about vidya and get paid for it.

>>389171973
Did he have a heart attack while playing?

>>389170592
Scalebound was shit.

>>389171634
>only popular
but that's wrong

>>389171565
>>389171669
What the fuck

>>389172012
Why don't you show me?

>>389172916
>emasculated deranged degenerate libshit commie sjw lgbt femen nu-male cuck millenials

You're right about journos but your use of buzzwords fucking disgust me to no end.

Is English your first language? Do you know how to write without having to rely on stupid meme words?

They should just patch the reviewer copies only, honestly

>>389171681
>try to make difficult game today
>"fuck this artificial difficulty"
>"this is truly the dark souls of _____"
>"fuck this game, I want a refund"

>>389170592
Scalebound was looking to be diarrhea in action game form.

>>389171565
>only good co-op
>local co-op only
>on home systems
>no Switch release
It's like they aimed at their feet when shooting.

>>389179057
Is Clinton's campaign the Dark Souls of political campaigns?

Here's a few excerpts from a Polygon journo who played Cuphead:

>An attractive, seemingly hand-drawn tutorial prepped me on the control scheme. I then met the world map with a big, dumb grin; same thing with the level I played, charmingly titled "Forest Foibles" like an old Merrie Melodies short. Seeing the world of Cuphead in motion, fluid and elastic like a Max Fleischer short, was a fantastic sight. But then I died. And died again. And again, and again, and again.

>As pretty as the scenery is, there’s no chance to soak in the environments when you’re always seconds away from death. I shouted numerous times during my playthrough, although I never quite quit. I’ll give it up to the art design for that, even if it began to taunt me. I now have the “You died!” title card seared into my brain for good, I think.

>Maybe I'm not quite up to the task of Cuphead, and that's OK. I'm happy to stick with watching cartoons and cartoon-y games, not playing them.

>>389179854
No, they should call out reviewers for being incompetent for not finding obvious solutions. Release a video that explains that first level in detail just to rub it in and ruin careers of people who killed difficult games.

>>389180393
Is Polygon the Dark Souls of journalism?

>>389169542
fucking Polygon again!

>>389169542
The Dark Souls of SHMUPs???

>>389180393
So basically "I like how it looks but it's too hard for me"

huh

>make metal slug but easier
>put in easy mode just to be sage
>"THIS GAME IS BULLSHIT"

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>>389169542
>Google cuphead
>First result is a video titled "7 Ways Cuphead will destroy you"
The fuck? From the footage I've seen it's not even Contra 3 tier.

>>389170932
The Dark Souls of tutorials!

>>389170932
kill me please

>>389170732
I know these retards need to shut the fuck up. Even ironically it's not funny.

>>389177361
The best players in the world tend to be asian and I doubt that guy grew in Japan. So I'd say no.

>>389173920
Aaahhh Shansaaaa

>>389171840
Fucking this, the bullet density is a joke, to die you have to jump like a retard

>>389180393
Why do these faggots always pretend their writing books or something?

Serious Cuphead question for a second.

All the recent footage I've seen so far has two difficulty settings on display: Simple and Regular.

Have they confirmed if the game's going to have a Hard mode yet? Is it one of those "beat the game on Normal to unlock Hard" deals?

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>>389178971
Good video.

>>389173393
at this point i want to see the shitty journo play Super Mario Bros, I'm curious how far he'd get before he called SMB1 the dark souls of Mario games.

>>389181239
Yeah they confirmed hard mode in an interview.
Pretty sure it was in one of the gamescom videos

>>389172456
You talk as if every new videogame had such an unique gameplay system, once you know the gimmick it's almost all the same

Also there's no excuse for big reviewing companies since they have several reviewers, you could specialize them

>>389181692
Good to know. Thank you.

>>389181239
>>389181884
It's New Game + though, like your original post says.

>>389174734
Nah, you're Lords Of The Fallen.

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>>389172551
I'm taking the bait, It fucking tells you what to do and how to do it exactly not even an illiterate child would have trouble with something as basic as a jump dash

>>389172456
I don't expect any game reviewer to be excellent at any game for that reason, but there are a lot of basic, universal skills that transfer from game to game, especially in those of the same genre. And those, at least, I expect to be cultivated by people whose job it is to play "lots" of games.

>>389172357
I wish there was no world map and it played seamlessly like Alien Soldier.

>>389179396
nope

>>389174978
deal wit it, old man

>xbox exclusive
I'm genuinely curious as to why they did this. Not a Sonyfag or anything, but it seems to me that a PS4 release would've been more advantageous.

>>389182668
Is this the Dark Souls of underage posting?

>>389182685
I'd guess paid timed exclusivity.

>>389182685
I presume MS funded them in exchange for exclusivity. The usual deal, really.

>>389182685
Xbox offered money for console exclusive, they accepted.
Also M$ is promoting the game since E3 2014.

more like cuckhead

>>389182685
I think Xbox approached them about it and they weren't about to turn them down.

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>>389172551
>Tfw to smart too play video games

>>389183206
>DSP playing Black Mesa.webm

>>389172710
lol

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>>389182752
if you played megaman 2 when it was relevant at 10 years old, youd be 40 years old and posting on /v/. put away the rotary phones and sell your wind up car, grandpa.

the ENTIRE megaman series sold less then wii sports resort. blue topped lady is literally a better seller then retarded robot

>>389172158
A reviewer called SMTIV the "Dark Souls of Persona" and it went from there

>>389183206
FUCK

>>389183206
I'm so fucking done with this world.

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>>389170732
After hearing nothing but unabashed praise for Dark Souls over the course of a decade, you get used to it.

I hate to say these two words yet again, but I heard that the original Dark Souls was actually harder on release and the patches adjusted the fuck out of the difficulty.

I got the game a few years after its release and found it incredibly easy, was it better unpatched?

>>389175406
A willing gf

>>389184434
Patches barely changed anything, people are full of shit. Curse could stack, so that was harder, and there are some other things, but largely it's the same game.

>>389184434
Go find a video of pre-patch Lost Izalith

>>389183206
thank you for making me feel better about myself

>>389180538
kek

The gameplay footage basically looks the same kind of difficulty as a Mega Man NES game ie if you aren't a dumbass, don't rush in and learn from your mistakes you'll be fine

>>389184434
if you found it easy patched you wouldn't have noticed a big difference, the only really important changes were that enemies drop like twice as many souls after the patch, and Capra Demon had everything difficult about him removed.

>>389184434
No. Elemental weapons were even more overpowered prepatch and darkwood grain ring worked up to 50%. Those two by themselves countered out almost everything that got made easier except for dragon asses aggroing from 5 miles away.

>>389171665
I think it's more like "if we reference another game it proves to the people that we play games even though we don't. Also, we don't need to describe anything because everyone knows the games we reference are notorious for something"

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Pills, the dark souls of killing yourself.

>>389184979
>and Capra Demon had everything difficult about him removed.
What? The dogs still have a chance of completely bumrushing and cornering you and killing you within seconds unless you have a lot of poise.

>>389185201
DWGR still worked on 50% post-patch, it was actually the Artorias of the Abyss expansion that changed it.

>>389185334
>implying
Pills never work for suicide unless they're an actual pill meant for the specific purpose of suicide. It's why women attempt suicide 40% more than men but succeed 90% less.

>>389178971
I think regular people just flat out don't read ANYTHING

Not before forming their opinion on politics, not in school, not if they had a gun to their head

Did they really not put online co-op into the game?

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>>389185835

>>389187078
Not at launch. Might come later.

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Fucken roasted

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>>389170732
>Is having SEX the DARK SOULS of daily life?

>>389178445
10 years of aaa games hand holding you at every step.

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>>389171146
I CAN'T WATCH THIS! HEY EVERYBODY I CAN'T WATCH THIS!

Jesus Christ that's embarrassing.

>>389172370
I know better than to believe this shit

You guys are really trying too hard with this. The game is actually somewhat challenging and he's clearly -trying- to play it, it's not the same thing as that insane Polygon video where it looks like they filmed my grandma trying to play a video game for the first time.

>>389188330
this looks worse than that doom attempt
objectively

>>389188330
>The game LITERALLY tells you to press Y over the obstacle
>Doesn't press Y for almost 2 minutes
Yeah, he's really trying.

>>389185712
Capra's a joke boss, the only reason it was ever dangerous was because it started the fight right on top of you initially, moving it back made that fight completely pointless.

>>389175439
>these people getting all the 7 emeralds
you give them too much credit

>>389188330

>and he's clearly -trying- to play it,

Yes, we can clearly see that. Too bad he got stuck in the mode of "trying" to play the game.

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>>389183376

>>389171973
I want to see these retards playing an easy Touhou fan game like Shoot Shoot Nitori
https://youtu.be/opd11YK78To?t=2m32s

>>389180393
>I'm happy to stick with watching cartoons and cartoon-y games, not playing them

Good thing they aren't a gaming journalist who needs to share their opinion on playing games.

>>389170732

Is Dark Souls 2 the Dark Souls of Dark Souls?

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>>389172551
marvelous work

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>>389170932

>>389189881
How does anyone think this shit is acceptable? Like who reads this and goes "yeah still respect this guys opinion.

>>389189573
that looks awful, you kill enemies that give you a lot of items and clutter the whole screen, and you are supposed to evade lot of tiny proyectiles
that is some shit tier design

The only games that get shilled this hard are shit. I have very low expectations and plan on pirating it.

>>389172904
this is such a toxic attitude. do you expect music reviewers to be able to play an instrument? do you expect movie reviewers to be filmmakers? why do you expect video game reviewers to be able to play video games?

>>389172916
>"journalists" are legit psychopaths who need to be systematically publicly executed.
amen, borther

isn't this game built in Unity? that should be enough of a turn off

>Your thumbs will be BLEEDING!!! xDD
>hold x to rapid fire
https://hooktube.com/watch?v=IUm-DYGOWu4

>>389171973

>Transforms in to a hydra.

I knew I would hate this boss and this just confirmed it.

>>389183206
I genuinely think the person playing is handicapped in some way.

>>389191025
You don't think hydras are cool?

>>389170943
You're a fucking faggot

Kill yourself

>>389190826
this board is for 18 years and older kiddo.

>>389179057
>>389180293
I don't know what the article is actually saying but going by the headline alone that's not nesscarily inaccurate. American politics is all about appealing to your voters, not about doing the correct or smart thing, so somebody campaigning on something with dumb opinions and plans but that plays into voter's emotions is gonna be more suecessful then some carefully planned, evidence based platform

>>389172401
ZombiU is not even hard.

>>389182685
>>389182850
>>389182890
>>389182951
>>389183098
it's not exclusive, you can get it on PC on windows 7 on steam and shit IIRC

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>>389172969
Because IQ is bullshit? Intelligence is much more complicated than a number.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ADjWWPE2CsM

>>389173067
>Lets try the same thing over and over again and not bother reading the tutorial text

>text tutorial indicates how to move
>now you can progress to the next scenario

>tutorial text indicates how to crouch
>...for no reason other than to demonstrate that it's possible
>crouching prevents movement, meaning the very first thing you learned (movement) has no purpose here
>establishing convention: these are isolated scenarios that have nothing to do with any previous or following scenarios

>the tutorial text indicates A to jump over an obstacle
>arrow indicates to jump over the first obstacle
>scenario makes sense and is easy to complete

>the tutorial indicates Y to dash on ground or air
>arrow indicates to dash over the obstacle
>the crouch obstacle did not involve obstacles from any previous scenarios, and neither did the first jump
>assume this design convention will persist: no backtracking, every obstacle is an isolated scenario
>this is not the case

The game establishes soft rules and doesn't follow them, likely because the designers are retarded. The first level is trial and error bullshit with cheap enemy placement that you wouldn't see in games like MegaMan until just before the final boss. It's going to have lousy sales unless they wise up quick.

>>389191964
>duck under the duck
>sprite stays in front of his

This upsets me.

>>389171146
I'm trying to picture this guy playing world 1-1 of Super Mario Bros.

>>389191964
Oh wow, an actual human being playing the game

The cursor triggers me though

>>389192134
You are massively overestimating the thought process that anyone would have while playing the tutorial. Only someone with severe mental problems would actually make the assumptions that you have claimed here.

>>389190673
I use this argument all the time elsewhere, but it doesn't apply here. Listening to music and watching movies are passive activities. You don't have to do anything other than pay attention to enjoy them. Video games require you to play them to enjoy them. Your argument would have worked if you said "you don't have to be a game designer to review games," but this is essentially being a movie critic who has glaucoma.

>>389192134
Do this many people have actual brain problems?

It's hard enough to imagine someone coming up with this, and it's basically impossible to believe that any rational, stable person will have this thought process

>>389193035
While I would somewhat agree with you, I must point out that journalism, as a job, does not require you to actually engage in what you are reporting on. He can go to an event, interview a guy, and that's an article. He can get some news from a source and just write an article and be done. He never has to play games to report on the industry that produces them, really.

Has anyone beaten the final moon form of the Zeppelin boss yet? It seems like her and the Dragon are the only ones that haven't been fully completed

>>389172870
is this edited or did they change the article? because i looked up the article and it doesnt say "of persona games" any more.

>>389190673
No, but I expect music reviewers to not be deaf.

>>389192653
>being so autistic you lack empathy
So you've never seen regular people with zero experience with a genre play a new game for the first time. I can even assume you've never taught anyone anything, because people learn by establishing patterns and playing easier scenarios before tackling more complex ones. A better "air dash" would be a pit, as opposed to a pillar. Following that, there should have been a series of boxes and pillars to reinforce the idea. Experienced players will breeze through, but new player NEED that.

>>389173924
Yes. Because men are vapid cunts.

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>>389193652

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>>389193797

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>>389193878

I hope the devil is a boss.

He clearly fucking cheated.

>>389193260
I get that, and that's fine when you're just repeating facts. But when you're writing articles based on your personal experiences and opinions, you should at least have a disclaimer stating that you're unable to experience it properly. Again, if I'm reading about a movie, I'd want to know if the journalist is going blind. It's not fair to the reader or the developer.

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>>389194191

>>389183206
>>389183206
It's the game's fault for not telling the player you can keep elevation by dashing mid-air. If a game can't teach basic game mechanics then it's bad game design.

>>389179146
26 minutes

>>389194595
it's a shame this looks so easy, art is great

>>389194546
lolno. this has literally been in games since the NES, and the dude has apparently been gaming for 18 years. This is pure autism.

>>389183206
I imagine this webm playing on loop in hell.

>>389169542

I can't put my finger on it, but everything about this game looks pretty bad.

>>389193525
That's not this issue, though. Of course someone who's never played a game in their life would have this problem. This man has been covering video games for 18 years or whatever. His job revolves around it. His readers should be able to trust the fact that he is able to play the games so he can report on them accurately. It's shit like this that causes us to wind up with skewed reviews because the reviewer finds the game too hard, when it turns out that they just suck at games.

I don't expect these people to be vidya wizards, but godamn, I expect them to not spend over a minute getting through a tutorial that spells out exactly how to play a game with simplistic controls, and then over twenty minutes being unable to progress even halfway through the first stage of a Contra clone. I really don't think that's outrageous to ask out of someone who gets paid to play video games.

>>389169542
>journalists who have been sent review copies of this are struggling to get past the first level
So it's just about right difficulty level then? Good to know

>>389170932
>these are the people who call Skyrim game of the year

>>389169542
They can't even get past the tutorial because they're absolutely retarded.

>>389193525
You said
>tutorial text indicates how to crouch
>...for no reason other than to demonstrate that it's possible
>crouching prevents movement, meaning the very first thing you learned (movement) has no purpose here
>establishing convention: these are isolated scenarios that have nothing to do with any previous or following scenarios

Empathy has nothing to do with it, that is not a normal thought process, that is the thought process of someone who not only rarely engages in video games, but rarely engages in anything trivial at all. That is someone dramatically overthinking something as extremely basic as being instructed what pressing down on a directional control does. You are decidedly unfit to determine what a "new" player needs, and most likely unfit to be having this conversation.

>>389172551
>One of the major faults of being intelligent is that you're a fucking moron who can't put 2 and 2 together

really activates the almonds

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>>389193260
The key word here is "require." Yes, being a journalist does not technically require you to possess basic, fundamental skills and experience found within that field. However, they ARE required if you expect your word to have any shred of credability. To review something, moreover to criticize something, you need a set minimum level of authority on the subject. To do anything less is a sign that the reviewer lacks journalistic integrity and their word should be taken with a grain of salt at best.

>>389170592
I'm looking around and Cuphead was going to come out whether or not Scalebound ever happened, so I don't know where you are getting this.

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>>389194546

>>389169542

>People complaining about the aesthetic

It's like you niggers have never watched Looney Tunes or any classic cartoons.

>>389195743
it's more in line with Betty Boop or early Disney cartoons than early Warner Brothers

>>389172401
>the dark souls of fantasy rpg
what the fuck man

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>>389194546
>the student isn't listening and didn't learn shit, mus be the teacher's fault

>Y ------------->
>DASH
>QUICK EVADE ON
>GROUND OR AIR

>GROUND OR AIR

>OR AIR

>>389170732
You are right but please calm down, no need to be upset.

>>389194620
Were you this good with playing Super Mario Brothers the first time, anon? The answer is a most redounding no, but a hypocrite like yourself has too much of an ego to admit as much in your life. You need to go back into the kitchen and get on with your sandwich making for you if you can not learn to quit being such a damn hypocrite to the OP on here. I know that I can probably play better than the OP, but at least I am smart, as well as nice enough, to not be a dick about it in life. I will offer constructive criticism, which is ironic, considering that I am autistic and, as such, have a difficult time about accepting, let alone interpreting, it from other people myself, to people like Mr. Takahashi, but at least I have enough of a fucking brain that it takes people a while to get the hang of video games. Let me also remind you that, in this day and age, side-scrolling shooters are indeed a rare breed of video games and that they are, sadly, on the verge of extinction, so comments like yours will ensure that, in the long run, people that make games like Cuphead will no longer make games like that and, if they are done enough times, then they will also filter into the more polished and realistic games that everyone else knows and it will also contribute to a video game industry crash that will far exceed what happened in 1982-1984, though it will not be the only reason that such a crash will happen. I could go on about the potential crash/market saturation of the video game market as a whole entire topic itself in another discussion, but the fact of the matter is that elitist twat waffles like yourself fail to comprehend two of the key rules of video games, which are to explore the mechanics of the game play and, gasp, TO SIMPLY HAVE FUN PLAYING VIDEO GAMES! This is the point that I am trying to make to all of you ungrateful little spoiled brats and you all would do well to comprehend it in your lives.

>>389194546
>bad game design
ah yes
the Bad's motto

>>389169542
This reminds me of Mickey Mania. Is it a similar style of game. MM was hard as fuck as a kid

>>389194230
If you actually ever looked at anything he's written, he doesn't do opinion pieces, or write on his experiences, that's not his job. I'm not sure why he played Cuphead or why they were stupid enough to upload his patently embarrassing time with it, but if you'll note, there's no commentary by him anywhere in the video itself or the description. He's not a video game reviewer, nor has he ever pretended to be one. He's a tech journalist who's specialized in the video game industry for over a decade. Just like people can make games and not play them, people can write about the games industry without playing video games. You're free to not like that, but it doesn't really matter what you like, now does it? It doesn't prevent him from accurately reporting the facts, it doesn't make his articles more poorly written, and it doesn't make him less trustworthy than any other random person with a keyboard and an internet connection.

>>389192134
This is good. I'm saving this.

>>389193590
sup roastie

>>389196117
He did write an article about the game though and it's pretty bad. He even claims the devs made Super Meat Boy for some reason.

>>389193590

Ayyyy
No girls alowed.

>>389170932
>people who are even worse at games than twitch streamers exist
HOW?

>>389195908
Wew lad

>>389196287
Well shit shows what I know

>>389193590
Or because men are actually far more honest and straighforward about their desires/intentions.

>>389195353
He's not wrong, it's a long standing criticism of democracy.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Criticism_of_democracyy#Manipulation_or_control_of_public_opinion

>>389195807
Early Warner Brothers is somewhat in line with what Betty Boop and Disney were, if slightly more chaotic.

>>389195908
good pasta

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>tfw to intelligent to dash jump

>>389196629
Yeah the whole media establishment was behind Trump 100% and supporting him the whole way

That guy clearly has below 100 IQ

>>389196767
They sure as hell helped him.

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>>389170932
>that pause at 1:04

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>>389196829

>>389196836
I wonder if someone was watching him play and told him to try pressing Y

>>389196836
holy shit i can feel him looking at his controller

>>389171146
This is just sad.

>>389172916

Literally every word in your post literally screams psychopath though.

I can't imagine you have any actual friends.

>>389191160
no no no, you got it all wrong.

he is doing it wrong on purpose, as part of a social experiment.

seriously tho, who on their right mind would defend such shitty gaming skills, that dean guy deserves only the worse for insulting whatever dignity is left of game journalism.

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>>389196836
wait a minute ....

>>389170732
Whiskey IS the dark souls of alcohol

>>389197454
kek

>>389197475
good but an overrated tryhard magnet? it fits

>>389197454
>ground or air
>air
What does it mean?

>>389171565
>Local co-op only
>Not coming to switch
>Initial release is on a console that has half the install based of it's main competitor

Seriously are the cuphead developers the dumbest fucking people on the planet or do microsoft just make them look like idiots.

>>389197626
It should have read "on the ground or in the air" vidya journalists have very low reading comprehension despite their chosen careers.

>>389197876
Why would this game come to the Switch? It's half funded by Microsoft. How retarded are you to not know about the Xbox@ID program?
It's local co-op only at launch. The online will come later. Literally nobobdy care about the online co-op for this game.

>>389187534
>>389187675

beautiful,

>>389197876
>>Not coming to switch
>>Initial release is on a console that has half the install based of it's main competitor
Xbone+Windows 10+Steam+Gog
>less instal bass
Hue Hue hue Hue
You can play this on a windows 10 Tablets such as Surface. Is it any different?

>>389198112
>It's half funded by Microsoft
Is there actually any source on that? Could just be a marketing deal or something.

>>389197876
>are the cuphead developers the dumbest fucking people on the planet
Microsoft is funding the game, that's like complaining why Bloodborne didn't come out on Xbone.

Is this for real? Now the game has to guide you step by step on how to play it? Where is the "Discovering and learn by yourself" That old games makes us do? Is like having some food feeding the guy by itself.

>>389172969
kys

>>389174772
JUICY

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>>389170732
let's go through your list
>Are Waffles the DARK SOULS of breakfast food items?
no
>Is Whiskey the DARK SOULS of alcohol?
to some people, yes
>Is having SEX the DARK SOULS of daily life?
to /v/, yes

>>389198232
Microsoft gave them funding in exchange for an exclusivity deal to finish their stuff. They still own the IP though so the next one might be coming every platform if this one is successful.

>>389170732
>Are Waffles the DARK SOULS of breakfast food items?
What is Shredded Wheat with no sugar/sweetener/fruit etc.

>>389198931
>Is there actually any source on that?

>>389198481
To play devil's advocate for a second, oldschool game controllers weren't nearly as complicated which made the amount of buttons/button combinations much easier to "discover and learn by yourself"
I really liked the tutorial for the first LittleBig Planet game which was essentially this level of spoon-feeding the controls to the player (although that might have been due to Stephen Fry's narration).
Like it or not, we live in an age where most games need to have the controls demonstrated in a tutorial.

>>389199182
https://finance.yahoo.com/news/retro-platformer-cuphead-remain-microsoft-161524320.html

>>389169542
Y'know what? This is actually some good publicity for the game. I didn't really care about it before but now I wanna play it to prove that hack journo wrong, on his twitter he's like "SHOW ME YOUR FIRST 26 MINUTES WITH THE GAME" which is by itself insulting because it's not out yet and the people priviledges enough to play it all suck donkey dick at basic video game skills.

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I wonder if people itt criticize videogames or journalism without ever having made a videogame or reported on something

>>389191459
How do you retards exist? Do you not know that console players consider something not being on the other console but being on PC exclusive still?

>>389199438
Since when is this a thing? I will laugh if Last of Us is on pc sometime.

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But when am I going to get some lewds of this bossfu?