Who dumped Whom?

>>380624215
It was mutual

Mario just disappeared into the Mushroom Kingdom.

>>380624215
Mario must be girthy as fuck just look at him compared to her, this dude prolly got a can of coke for a dick

tall women can't hook up with short men. It's a sad fact of life. but I'm sure Pauline is cheering for Mario to find his dream girl!

Mrio did

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xjO_a-vW_R0

>>380625291
fpbp

>>380624215
>IM YOUR BING BING WAHOO GIRL
What did she mean?

>>380627195
haha

>>380628061
Can't believe I used to think these were funny,

>>380624215
They were never together. Pauline was DK's girl, and he got a little too coked up one night. Mario was his best friend who decided he needed to step in.

>>380628323
I find their older stuff funny still.

>>380626671
this, he just ghosted her

>manlets

>>380624215
Pauline left him to become mayor of New Donk City, because Mario's plumbing business was under performing. This was around the time Mario started taking drugs to escape, as well as living with his brother and midget friends, along with that dude who has really bad hump back that people ride on it.

>Mario and Pauline pick things up again
>Peach and Bowser get married

would you be mad?

>>380629075
I hope this happens. Listening to the main song makes me think that this will happen too.

>>380624215
Mario dumped her, according to Miyamoto.

>>380624215
Pauline is a coalburner and Mario a cuck

>Mario I don't think
*bing bing WAAHOOOOOOOOO*
>it's going to work out
*WAHAW YAHOO YAHOO*
>between us
*WAHAW YAHOOOOOOOOOOOOOO BING BING 1up let's a go*

>>380629075
I don't think it will happen, because it is too much plot for a Mario game. Also everyone will be mad about Peach and Bowser getting together, because fuck that.

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>>380624215
>yfw you realize mario's torso makes up 20% of his body

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>>380624215

I want to be her 1-Up Boy.

>>380630829
Why are female artists so incapable of drawing expressions?

>>380631218

Are you implying that wasn't drawn by a team of otaku chinks working 20 hours a day in a Japanese sweat shop?

>>380631218
>Why are female artists so incapable
There, fixed it for you. There is no woman that can reach a grandmaster tier talent for drawing and painting.

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>>380631506
The key frames were probably still done by a woman considering it's an anime adaptation of a shoujo manga.
Pic related is also from a shoujo anime.

>>380624215
i dumped my dick inside of her if you know what i mean

>>380626869
He left a hole in her no man could fill

>>380631765
Le misogyny faggot

>>380626869
Just look at his hands bro, that nigga packing Lysol aerosol spray can

>>380624215
>5"11 vs 6"2

>>380624215
>perfect height for eating her out

>>380629349
what a funny and original joke

if we were on reddit I'd upboat you kind sir

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>>380632523

You're not thinking outside the box.

>>380632405
>Le knowledge of art outside weeb "artists" is muhsoggyknees now
Get fucked ignorant nigger.

>>380632795
It's not any weirder than seeing Danny Devito with a woman honestly
He should be mario's new voice

>>380624215
Neither. Nothing ever even started. Mario saves Pauline from DK, Pauline doesn't put out, then Mario fucks off; leaving Pauline to take care of herself.

Afterward Pauline stops being a gold digger, gets her shit together, over the years achieves more and more success and that's why she's mayor of New Donk City in Odyssey

>>380634251
But she canonically Mario's ex-girlfriend, not even memeing.

>>380631765
Post your art if you're so great faggot.

Pauline porn when?

>>380631765
>>>/r9k/

>>380624215
Their lives just went in different directions. Her responsibilities as mayor kept her in NDC while Mario was off being a hero.

>>380624215
if it's this iteration of Pauline, they were never together.

Jumpman and the original Pauline were Mario and Luigi's parents, this Pauline is form the MvDK series, starring the modern iterations of both Mario and DK, this DK is DK Jr's Son.

the timeline doesn't match up for these two to have ever been together, if anything, they met because 'hey this is fucking weird, isn't it?'

>>380630985
She doesn't need a boy, she needs a 1-Up Man.

And she doesn't want any Extra Guys, either.

>>380629349
Made me laugh for some reason

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Is that even a question?

>>380624215
will we get to posses her with the cap?

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>>380624215
Pauline was stole and raped by Cranky Kong. She became mindbreak addicted to his giant cock. Mario moved on to Peach. Cranky Kong got old and now Pauline wants Mario back but as you can see by her city, she's still obsessed with Cranky Kong's fat gorilla cock.

Isn't Pauline Mario's mom? And Jumpman is his dad?

>>380639025
>Cranky Kong
>giant cock
>Gorilla
>giant cock
no wonder they call him cranky kong.

>>380624215
Is Pauline the ultimate cuck?

>Mario vanishes one day into the mushroom kingdom without saying a word
>Comes back decades later with his Princess girlfriend
>Pauline still wants to be his "1UP" girl

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>>380639025
>Gorilla's
>Giant cocks
Do some research before you shitpost.

>>380639025
Gorillas have micro penises actually.

Once he found the pipe to the mushroom kingdom he never came back until now. He's finally back home guys

>Super Mario: Returns

>>380639252
yeah, but /v/ likes to pretend it's not true because GameTheory stole the concept and presented it like they came up with it

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>>380639736
>>380640246
>>380640425
>Gorillas
>Kongs
Niggas they are fucking 10-12 ft tall. Even if they had small dicks they would still be huge to a human.

>>380640841
I don't think you realize what 'micropenis' means on something twice the size of a human.

multiply 1.5 by 2, is that suddenly 24?

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>>380636285
Drawfags need to get on it. With this >>380638927 scenario

>>380641065
KONGS HAVE HUGE PENISES. You can't use real world logic when it comes to game characters. REAL gorillas are also not 10 ft tall. So fuck you bitch. Kongs would make you human boys look like chumps. You stupid bitch ass niggas.

>>380641727
how would you know how huge a Kong's dick is, anyway?

hmmmmMMMMMMM?

>>380630540
I've literally heard nothing but excitement at the idea of peach and Bowser getting together.

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>>380641727
If kongs have such huge dicks then why do more and more Kong women start trying to attract humans?

I mean, look at this.

>>380641727
Stop going to blacked.com seriously

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>>380624215
More importantly: Why the fuck does Mario barely reach her hips nowadays? He was relatively the right size for her (reaching from her shoulders to her chest in the different MvsDK games), but now he looks really off...

>>380641861
Because research n' shiet. I'm knowledgeable as fuck. Also Mario is a jumpman and they are overcompensating bitches. They know that the only way they can get girls is by saving them from Kongs like my..erh I mean the original DK.
>>380642125
They do it to make ya'll human boy thursty.
>>380642185
Like those humans could even come close to a Kong.

>>380642684
Living in different levels of gravity really fucks you up

Mario is clearly a heavyworlder considering his physical abilities and small stature.

Why does no one like Luigi?

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>>380642782
Nah, it's because they're thirsty for the BHmC (Big Human Cock)

Less and less kong ladies are walking on their knuckles and acting like proper animals. Some of them even fantasize bout being seen as "sexy" by humans.

You're getting culturally enriched

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Do you think we'll get an Original Pauline skin/suit for her?

>>380642950
Being a younger brother, I do like him. He's one of my favourite vidya characters and never understood why they decided to make him a whinny coward since Luigi's Mansion.

>>380642782
why are you looking at Kong dicks, anon, sounds pretty gay

>>380629075
Peach is a cock teasing thot, let Bowser have her.

>>380641727
WE WUZ KONGZ

>>380643308
Dat hoe is only half Kong. Humanz don't know this but she's actually adopted.
>>380643861
I look because like I said I'm very knowledgeable about things, shiet. If you saw a Kong cock and saw how giant it was especially compare to little jumpmanlets, you would research it too.

Xbox One X
>put disc in
>play game

PC
>buy multiple parts that cost $1000 for a decent build
>have to manually put together all the components
>keyboard is uncomfortable and confusing since 95% of the buttons have no input on the game
>you have to replace all your parts every 1.5 years as the graphics cards become worse over time and run worse
>have to install a video game license rental service like Steam
>have to play $60 for recently released games but have no benefits as physical copy
>there are constant updates for games slowing down the chance of playing the game
>games constantly crash and run into compatibility problems
>Nvidia gimps their cards with Gameworks to make you buy their newer hardware
>try to play some indie games but most are uninspired rip offs of older SNES games I played
>try a early access to literally alpha test a game with barely any content and runs poorly
>can't let my friends borrow my games without jumping though huge obsoletes and even then we can't play each others games if the other is playing a different game at the time
>try to play older games from my childhood on N64 and PS2 emulators
>try to plug in my controller to use for more comfortablility but it requires multiple drivers and constantly rebind the controls every time I switch games
>download emulator for them but they take a while to get the right settings and even then the games run poorly and are missing textures and other graphical glitches
>try to play older PC I heard from others but the run into compatibility problems and constantly crashes when tried to play
>try to play a fun looking multiplayer game but the game is filled with hackers and childern and young teens constantly spouting memes
>try to play split screen with my friends but hardly any games supports split screen and is a hassle to set up
>start playing less and less and go on /v/ and shitpost more about games even ones I never even played

Answer me: what is the point of PC gaming?

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>>380644684

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>>380644689
?????

>>380644689
pretty knowledgable about bein' a fag, bro

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>>380644818
>Xbox
>TV, game, console and controllers already set up

>PC
>buy the parts, monitor, mouse, keyboard, speakers, games, desk, chair, interet, router, modem, ethernet cable, and house

>>380633061
i'm the one only thats make porn of this

>>380644818
You don't have to pay for games for the next ~12 years.

>>380644818
Working in a second hand game store lets you know just how bullshit that bit about the xbone is, unless the X suddenly changed this, which I doubt.
Unless you are playing shovelware like CN Battlechasers (which is a fucking godsend for what we do), you are waiting like half an hour before you can play after putting in that disc because it has to install something. And if your console itself happens to need an update, that's another huge period of time where you are waiting, since the console gets pissy with you if you try to tell it to fuck off.

>>380645194
>Implying Candy and Tiny ain't mixed
Candy's and Tiny's mothers were Female humans that wanted some Giant Kong dicks and got knocked up and that's why they got Human proportions.
>>380645268
I guess veterinarians are gay too because they look at animal dicks all the time.

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>>380642950
ye i hate this. i like mario more but seeing everyone not appreciate luigi sucks. at least he got double pity kiss from peach and paper peach at the end.

>>380643308
>Occupation: tax official
Damn, DK Isle's economy must be a lot better than we're led to believe.

>>380628061
>Mario
dropped

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>>380648145
Anyone has the gif/webm of them trapped in the cage, and while regular Peach freaks out, Paper Peach simply slides between the cage's bars?

>>380631218
>>380631765
Fuck off to /r9k/ MGTOW faggots

>>380642684
This actually gets explained by Game Theory. Donkey Kong's size-changing bananas did it. It's actually a pretty good theory.

>>380624215
>Pauline is going to become more well known
Feels good my nigs

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>>380651708
>Game Theory
>Not "Mat Pat's Face every 5 seconds with stupid grimaces: The Show"

He does some nice theories, but damn, I hate how he inserts his stupid smug face all times.

>>380652204
>people think the girl in Donkey Kong is Peach
>I thought the girl in Donkey Kong was Peach

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>>380651708
>>380652557
MatPat has the most punchable face in existence.

>>380642684
Just to make her look more in line with the other normal looking NPCs I guess the.

>>380633920
>>380632795
this is the same outfit that Bob Hoskin's (the guy that played Mario in the live-action movie) uses in Who Framed Roger Rabbit

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>>380652619
I thought the girl in Pinball was Peach since, back then, Peach -or to be exact, Princess Toadstool- was portrayed with brown hair.

>>380641727
>You can't use real world logic when it comes to game characters.
Then Mario has a three foot cock

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>>380653343
Yeah, and when they use this image with every stupid filter imaginable, it really makes me want to punch his stupid mug.

>>380648162
>8 year old girl wielding a crossbow
>a good choice for such a position

>>380642125
Is Tiny half human?

>>380643308
>Tax Official

>>380628502
This is canon for me now

>>380629075
It would destroy the universe

>>380629349
>I literally cannot stop thinking about black cocks

>>380629075
Bowser and Peach are still legally married from SPM. The Chaos Heart appearing meant the marriage was valid.

>>380626869
Dude the only man that could one up him was a literal gorilla.

Black dudes must be too small. Granted Italians aren't known for being very big, there is a reason they hate the blacks and the Irishs.

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>>380624215
>Pauline is the Mayor
>The city is named New Donk City
>DONKey Kong
>Pauline was in Donkey Kong
>Donkey Kong in Donkey Kong is Cranky Kong nowadays
>Cranky is never seen in a relationship
>Mario Odyssey takes place after Cranky passed away
>Pauline named the city after him, when he was in his prime

Why is the Mario lore so deep?

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>>380633061
Wouldn't that count as INSIDE the box?

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>>380658218
>Cranky is never seen in a relationship
This is his wife.

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>>380658913
Or did he and Pauline date behind the scenes, until his demise?

So, /v/, how will they find a way to shoehorn space into the game to include Koizumi's waifu?

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>>380651708

>>380626869
Just imagine that she was left with a hole so large that she cucked Donkey Kong out of an entire fucking city.

>>380657971
Gorillas literally have some of the tiniest dicks possible.

>>380624215
>Not knowing this is a prequel to Donkey Kong and the final mainline Mario

>>380659356
Everyone seems to want DK's bananas, and the only time he has to fight huge versions of enemies is when the villains have them under their control.

>>380659513
Donkey Kong is the exception

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>>380642950
Luigi is the mom of the group

>>380658218
>Pauline named the city after him, when he was in his prime
You've got it backwards. Donkey's actually named after the place he was first sighted, New Donk City. Think Nessie.

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>>380624215
but will you be able to hat-rape her?

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>>380660660

>>380624215
She was getting that DKC

>>380660785
Christ these fakes are so weak.

>>380660785
damn, what if our kids play this game and try to emulate it by taking over peoples minds with magic hats?

>>380660785
>top scientists
How do I major in Rape Science?

>>380660785
>>380660923
Sadly it wouldn't surprise me if it were real

>>380660923
anon...

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This is a different Pauline

Mario's ex lives in Brooklyn

Mario Odyssey is LITERALLY a game about traveling to other universes

>>380661584
The Brooklyn thing hasn't been canon for years. In Donkey Kong '94, Mario and co. walk to the Mushroom Kingdom from the city.

>>380660953
>>380661082
>>380661159
>>380661168
And people say neo-/v/ isn't real. I didn't even have to fucking read to see how fake that shit is.

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>>380642950

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>>380651708
>MatPat

>>380624215
when will they learn

>>380662648
What the FUCK is Toad's problem?

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>>380624215

He decided he'd rather be the girl.

>>380643474
mario looks weirdly handsome here

>>380657704
Opposite of that, it meant Bowser and Peach getting married is the most invalid thing in the world

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>>380663432

>>380632406
this nigga need two hands to jerk off and he still got more room the fuck

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>>380641709
>>380663949
>>380663432

Can this please PLEASE not be a thing

Why would anyone want to rap to fucking Mario or wario in a chick's body

We are reaching peak degeneracy, STOP

>>380664275

I wanna be the one possessing.

>>380664275
>rap to fucking mario
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=44MyrH4jwOQ

>>380664275

>we are reaching peak degeneracy

Son, we havent even fully realized the potential of VR yet. When the internet hits 88 fetishes an hour, you're gonna see some serious shit.

>>380664275
I'm gonna use meme magic to make a thing just to spite you.

>>380664275
>He doesn't rap to fucking Mario
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=44MyrH4jwOQ

>>380664275
>Why would anyone want to rap to fucking Mario or wario in a chick's body
Self-insertion, people just mostly like the possessing part of it & are probably going to ignore the character who's doing it.

>>380660785
All I could think of was this: https://youtu.be/qC_iOYvTBYM?t=301

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>>380660785

>>380664439
>>380664713
big mrain-mind

>>380627195
Bullshit. My roommates are literally just that

>>380664439
topkek

>>380629424
Underrated post

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>>380637805
>Jumpman and the original Pauline were Mario and Luigi's parents
You mean Jumpman and Louise. Pauline came much later.

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>>380651708
You're expecting me to trust the guy who pushed the "Princess peach is Roselina's mom" theory, which he stole?

>>380663432
>>380663949
Drop the fucking bombs and cleanse this earth with nuclear fire.

>>380624215
Dude....She is seriously tall as fuck compared to Mario (not that's a problem or anything). Anyway, it would Pauline that dumped him since he's gone after a royal slut who never gives it up to him besides a giant dragon turtle.

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>>380664275
>these fags think possession, body swap, or character transformation fetish is new

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>>380664275
>he doesn't want to BING BING Mario's WAHOOs

>I’m-a saying it because it’s-a true. Inside-a of us, we both know you-a belong with Kong. You’re part-a of his work, the thing that keeps-a him going. If that plane leaves-a the ground and you’re not with him, you’ll-a regret it. Maybe not today. Maybe not tomorrow, but soon and-a for the rest of your life. …
>We’ll-a always have Donk City. We-a didn’t have, we, we lost it until you-a came to The Mushroom Kingdom. We-a got it back last night. …
>And you-a never will. But I’ve-a got a job to do, too. Where I’m-a going, you can’t follow. What I’ve-a got to do, you-a can’t be any part of. Pauline, I’m-a no good at being noble, but it doesn’t take much to see that the problems of three-a little people don’t amount to a hill of beans in this crazy world. Someday you’ll understand that. …Now, now…
>Here’s-a looking at you kid.

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>>380667241
This is some good shit

>>380660028
Did you say mom?
Momma Luigi?

>>380626671

Hmm, so the old lore that Mario is from Brooklyn but one day ended up in the Mushroom Kingdom is still sorta canon, just instead of Brooklyn it was actually New Donk City?

Is this lore?

>>380626671
Nah, Mario visited New Donk City for a while, saved Pauline and then went back to the Mushroom Kingdom

obviously

>>380669374
yes and donkey kong is named after donk city. I bet the alligators from DKC also come from the same zoo as kong did. the streets named them, not the other way around.

Mario left for glory and riches and achieved them.

He just doesn't spend them on castles or fashion due to bowser possibly being a dick. His own island got fucked over by wario but he got it back.

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>already TG porn of Mario turning into hot women with his cap

>>380629075
It would be like a prequel.

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>>380629075
>next game
>Super Mario Jr.

>>380667241
Yeah,

>>380651708
I may not have played any Donkey Kong game, but I seriously doubt there are size-changing bananas in the games.

>>380624215
cousins

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>>380672254
oops wrong image sorry

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Spin the wheel, take a chance
Every journey starts a new romance
A new world's calling out to you
Take a turn, off the path
Find a new addition to the cast
You know that any captain needs a crew

What did Pauline mean by this?

How does a greasy goblin like Mario get all these attractive women?

>>380675792
A lot of people are into strong, but chubby hairy dudes like Mario. His height doesn't matter as much once you see him swing that hammer.

>>380675219
She payed Bowser to kidnap Peach so she can have Mario all to herself

>>380629075
>would you be mad
Very.

>>380663949
>>380663432
>>380641709
i love that this is a thing. please any draw fags give us more.
i really need to see mario possesing peach and taking that thicc lizard dick

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>>380628502
That is bullshit, and lemme tell you why.
SHE was the cokehead. I was funding her habit and everyone made it look like I supplied HER. The nerve of those bastards! As soon as I got my shit straight, I left her and went straight to the jungle to get away from that city, that cheeky plumber and his gay dinosaur buddy that kept snickering at every little thing we'd say.

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>>380675219
I am so fucking happy that Pauline is still in love with Mario and they didn't just retcon her to be his sister or something stupid like that.

>>380664439
>already know what it is before clicking the link
man T-dubs is just like that man who made a toilet. It was so awesome

>>380672254
l i n k p l e a s e

>>380640086
Calling women "cucks" is dumb. It's projecting male psychology onto women. Women want men who are desired by other women; it is a gauge of male attractiveness and make women feel good they have their hands on the best mate.

Pauline still wanting Mario is completely normal. The fact he has princess pussy only increases his worth in her eyes.

>>380629075
Nope
Thrilled that Nintendo went off the rails w

>>380624215
Be homest /v/, what do you think is the absolute minimum amount of A presses that will be needed to finish Oddyssey?

>>380676816
Will Cranky appear in Odyssey?

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>>380677307
7 and a half

>>380677080
Are you kidding me?

Plenty of women are cucks.

Hell, the last broad I was with watched as I boned her mom right in front of her and STILL did not break up with me.

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>>380677307

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>>380664275
>>380666891

>>380677467
Again, you are projecting male expectations onto women.

>>380629075
yes, it would make all the annoying crackship autists too happy. I don't want any edgy romantic twists in Mario, just let him get with the damn princess already.

>>380624215
When did Mario date Carmen Sandiego?

>>380677467
>>380677910

Search for "cuckquean"

real talk though. if you had cappy
and you possessed a female
would you suck dick or no?

>>380664275
says the fucking anime poster lmfao

>>380642950
IRL: everyone likes luigi, you're not special
In-game: Getting shit on is just his running gag. It also works the sympathetic factor to make him more charming.

>>380678150
A fetish. Outside bedroom kinks, a man chasing after a girl who fucks around lacks self-respect, while women doing the same is more normal than people can accept. The sexes are wired differently.

>>380675219
I doubt the wedding will actually happen but if it does or even if they admit that they love each other and/or kiss for real I may cry a bit.

>>380632795
There's something so fucking uncanny about her face and animations. Kind of creeps me the fuck out.

>>380660785
Top scientist makes it really fucking obvious

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>>380679191
The way she's looking down makes her eyes look like they have too much white, making her look crazy or terrified.

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>>380660785

>>380627195
t. manlet projecting

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>>380629075
Yes

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bEG4JQazpXg

>>380630540
>too much plot for a Mario game
>Koizumi at the helm

That didn't stop him before. Did you forget how many stupid cutscenes were in Sunshine?

>>380624215
Mario didn't date his mother.

>>380675219

She meant romance as in heroic adventure, not love.

She thought he was a kid based on his height and when she found out he was a man she dumped him

>>380675219
>>380676929
>Pauline appears in a trailer and signs a song
>That alone gives her more personality than Peach and Daisy combined
What a strange turn of events.

>>380664275
2 late fugboh

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>>380640841

All the humans in New Donk City are 7 foot tall superhumans it appears.

>>380639025
>yfw years ago New Donk City had a famous performing gorilla.
>They named it "Donkey Kong" after the city.
>Eventually he had a son.
>Eventually he started to get too old and weak to perform so the city let him retire to a faraway island, and his son was raised to be the new Donkey Kong.
>DK II has his own son, DKJr.
>DK II hates being a performing ape and kidnaps Pauline, only for Mario to save her.
>For the safety of both the gorillas and the city, the city decides to send both of them to the island.
>DK II dies for some dumb reason and Jr. is raised by his grandfather, the original Donkey Kong.
>Cranky Kong never fought Mario, but was the very first DK in to perform in New Donk City, DK II is dead and was the one who originally fought Mario and Jr. grew up to be the Donkey Kong known today.

>>380659513
[citation needed]

>>380629075
>Mario Jr.
>Princess Peach son

>>380629075
Not really. Peach and Bowser moreso than Mario and Pauline. I mean how many years has it been and Peach STILL hasn't given Mario anything other than cake? Mario needs to actually get with someone who is willing to commit, instead of just expecting him to save her every week.

Pauline is hotter than Peach anyway.

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>>380624215
>you will never violently rape Pauline

>>380629075
>Peach and Bowser get married

So Miyamoto is paying child support and alimony fees to Bowser?

>>380679191
She's obviously in the surprised animation state and is repeating generic talking animations until the dialogue advances.

why would a tall girl want to fuck a short guy, anyway

>>380684193
/ss/ fetish

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When did your Male mind in female body fetish began anons?
mine gotta be pic related

>>380682994
It's funny, but Pauline being that much taller than Mario means that the male humans in the city are going to tower over him even more, since we do see she is a head smaller than her bodyguards/band members.

>>380685412
I've got a gender bender fetish that I'm pretty sure originated from the movie Scooby Doo 2.

I hope Pauline and Mario will get back together. She was only his canon love other than Peach and Daisy.

The other shippings are just fandom/uncanon shit

>>380685412
i remember having bod swaps dreams with my crush back in school.

i guess i kinda always had it, but its more like a "posession" fetish thing.

i always made her have sex with every guy on school it was kinda hot.

>>380629424
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G8sYvNtjXRI

Mario can talk like a normal person, he isnt link

>>380683267
Gorilla penises are only 1 inch
Humans actually have the largest among the primates

>>380689883
tfw mario never told nintendo to make f-zeo