ITT: elegant jokes

>You liked Rashomon
>That's not how I remember it

https://youtu.be/sHzdsFiBbFc

Sneed's

Knock Knock!

>>80621376
Who's there?

>>80621275
came to post this

simple yet great

>You see Steve, the good thing about bullies is they don't just go away. You're forced to deal with them.
>How did you deal with Stelio?
>Hmm, good story. He moved away.

>>80621531
You have to be at least 18 to post here, friend

>>80621406
Big guy

>give a hoot, read a book

>>80621275
>there are people that won't get this
>there are people that say anyone that does looked it up

>>80621689
>arbys

>>80621406
Free pizza!

>>80621531
That's a decent joke but it's not particularly elegant, is it? It's a pretty standard setup-punchline format, fairly wordy. OP or Rashomon are far more crisp and concise

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>well Lisa, looks like the bear patrol is working like a charm
>that's specious reasoning, dad
>thank you sweetie
>by your logic I could claim this rock keeps tigers away
>oh? ... explain how
>it doesn't
>uh huh
>it's just a stupid rock
>uh huh
>but I don't see any tigers around, do you?
>... Lisa, I would like to buy your rock

>>80623344
There he is. There he goes again. Look, everyone! He posted it once again! Isn't he just the funniest guy around?! Oh my God. I can almost see your pathetic overweight frame glowing in the dark, lit by your computer screen which is the only source of light in your room, giggling like a like girl as you once again type your little Bane thread up and fill in the captcha. Or maybe you don't even fill in the captcha. Maybe you're such a disgusting NEET that you actually paid for a 4chan pass, so you just choose the picture. Oh, and we all know the picture. The "epic" CIA agent guy, isn't it? I imagine you little shit laughing so hard as you click it that you drop your Doritos on the floor, but it's ok, your mother will clean it up in the morning. Oh, that's right. Did I fail to mention? You live with your mother. You are a fat fucking fuckup, she's probably so sick of you already. So sick of having to do everything for you all goddamn day, every day, for a grown man who spends all his time on 4chan posting about a capeshit movie. Just imagine this. She had you, and then she thought you were gonna be a scientist or an astronaut or something grand, and then you became a NEET. A pathetic Banefag NEET. She probably cries herself to sleep everyday thinking about how bad it is and how she wishes she could just disappear. She can't even try to talk with you because all you say is "FOR YOU FOR YOU FOR YOU." You've become a parody of your own self. And that's all you are. A sad little man laughing in the dark by himself as he prepares to indulge in the same old dance that he's done a million times now. And that's all you'll ever be. Forever...

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>there was something strange about the way he walked... much more vertical than usual

>but the main thing that tipped me off that he was the catburglar was that he has the world's largest cubic zirconia on his coffee table

>>80621756
What is a "crisp" joke? Are you fucking retarded?

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>This is yet another example of the late neoclassic Baroque period. And, as I always say, "If it's not Baroque, don't fix it!"

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>of course for safety reasons we don't keep the cannon loaded

>>80624904
this is a simpsons thread retard

>>>/co/

>>80624904
Good job, you retarded faggot. Kill yourself

>>80621710
>>80621275
I watched the film after hearing this joke.

What's not mentioned is that the whole episode where the Simpsons go to Japan is terribly unfunny. Just god awful with only one worthwhile gag

>>80623344
Chuck's Feed & Seed?

>>80621376
come in

>>80621406
James Cortas; 2. [laughter]

guys i cant find my water bottle anywhere, have any of you seen it

i'm thirsty

>>80625080
Actually, it's an "elegant joke" thread. Just because OP used a Simpsons pic doesn't mean it's a simpsons thread.

Also, half the threads on /co/ are about the simpsons.

You should lurk more before commenting.

>>80625184

yup

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Stickin' together is what good waffles do

[at the gas station]

Homer: I keep hearing this horrible irregular thumping noise.

[The noise is heard between Homer and an attendant he speaks to.]

Attendant: It's your heart. And I think it's on its last thump.

Homer: Oh, I thought it was my transmission. [drives away]

Boy: Where's he going?

Attendant: You remember that old Plymouth we just couldn't fix?

Boy: We're going to sell him to Mr. Nikopopolous?!

Attendant: You're a dull boy, Billy.

>>80621676
___________4you_______________##########################_______________________________#####################################_____________________________##############

>>80625251

I like this

>>80628141

Nice blog.

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=s4GAj2v4BIE

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>>80623344

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This one always gets me

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nFArYx3Ay84

>>80630038
elegant joke

>>80630038
I understand now.

>>80625028
Its just common sense

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>I'm confiscating these
>They're Mn'evidence

the only good joke

>>80621227
When did you realise Crusty was just Homer with hair?

>>80623508
>sneakers
>for sneaking

>>80627180
Lesbians in the background

>>80631017
I don't get it

>>80631083
It doesn't make sense out of context anyway

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ipg3XYz7f9Q

>>80630038
explain this please, i'm russian

>>80631237
Chuck's fuck and suck. Anyone who says otherwise is memeing

>>80631083
Homer asked for this beer at Apu's and he said such thing does not exist.

>>80630038
really makes me think...

>>80631319
no, it's just Chuck's. your lewd mind comes up with that distasteful rhyme

>>80621227
The joke in this episode where Homer introduces himself in class in one of the best jokes of the show

>>80631027
imagine how badly that would trigger /tv/ if it was aired today

>>80634871
hahahahaha he said lewd

>>80630038
ELEGANT

This is the thread that finally made me realise that the Simpsons was never funny.

>>80636821
>>80636821
Is the Simpsons unfunny?

No, it's /tv/ who are wrong

>>80631027
The joke before that was the diner was full of female runaways like Marge and whatever the hell Marge's friend was called. Though IIRC Marge's friend was a lesbian

>>80637299
It was never stated or implied in the episode. Maybe later they changed it

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>>80627180
i dont get this. how is it a fucking joke
SOMEONE EXPLAIN IT TO ME... NOW!

>>80631677
Well, that depends on what you mean by cwisis