PC marriage

Giving your character a spouse at character creation is the best way to go.

Yep, my poor Cleric got married off to a villain to get the party out of being horribly killed one time.

He was understandably upset when he got her in bed to find out she was undead. (Necropolitan, barely look any different from living humans until you get reeeeal close)

>>51708978
My blackguard married some elven witch we rescued, ended up settling down in some nice remote location and built a proper dark tower for them, they had kids and lives a fairly quiet life

it was the end of his character arc of regaining faith in the world

I had PC unite with defeated antagonist via the eternal bound of diablerie. Does that count?

>>51708978
I played an old warrior with a wife back home. Adventuring in order to finance a lavish lifestyle for her.

I tried to make it important.
It wasn't.
I just killed things and complained about young people.

>>51708978
The party Warlock married the Paladin after he got her pregnant with a batch of adorable eldritch monstrosities. They ended up founding an entirely new church.

>>51708978
Two of my current party started out married to each other. They were an odd couple, one a human with demonic ancestry and the other a wolf-man. They happily adventured together serving the gods and fighting evil. Unfortunately, the best general of the archlich we are fighting slew one of them and trapped her soul so she couldn't be resurrected.
I knew another player who started the campaign married, but was having a lot of issues with his marriage. The call of a foreign king for adventurers to aid him on a quest was a boon to escape his marriage for a while.

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>>51709130

>>51709005
Only this if you trust your GM/DM/whatever they call themselves. If you don't trust them, then your PC should never get married. Never.

Anyone ever have a monster waifu

>>51709330
We had a Storm Giant chick we did quests for whom one of the party fell in love with.

She used to bath naked in a gigantic hot spring atop a snowy mountain.

>>51709277
Naw, it was all very innocent. Star crossed lovers and all that. Except it actually turns out nice.

>>51709330
do vampires count?

>>51709349
Did she ever like him back

>>51709357
Yes

>>51709298
Trust schmust. Even if they kill off your waifu, you still have inlaws to lean on for help and use as contacts. Make a character who has family all over the known world, so you always have someone to crash with and to help you hide bodies and make authentic food like mama used to make.

>>51708978
My Martell character got memed by a Lannister slut who sucked his dick and then put the cum on her cunt in order to get pregnant. I think the family wanted to extort me with the existence of the bastard or something.

The DM was a bit surprized when I said that I would do the correct thing and actually marry the girl and accept the kid as mine. I actually even pondered the option of asking her before the kid thing since my character and the girl had fought a White Walker together and he respects that.

>>51709389
She thought of him as some sort of adorable pet, we think. She let him brush her hair.

Not sure what he would have done if she did give in though, she had tits bigger than his entire body.

>>51709476

>Marry into Lannisters. Always have lines of credit open from then on.

Lannisters are rich as fuck and care about family, so presumably having a Lannister-blooded kid means you will always be able to draw on cash from their goldmine.

>>51709476
Curious how that session went.
>Roll to blow your load in the blonde's mouth.

>>51709491
>Not sure what he would have done if she did give in though, she had tits bigger than his entire body.
Get promoted from pet to dildo?

>>51709298
If you don't trust them, you shouldn't be playing with them anyway.

>>51709526
That's true, although I'm from the House Martell which is another Great House myself and my character is not very ambitious so more cash is not really something that he wants or needs.

For now he's just happy after doing what's correct and a bit shocked of having to be responsible for the first time in his life. And as a player I know that Lannisters never do things out of charity, if their professional slut daughter managed to marry my guy it's because they have plans for him.

>>51709562
To be honest, my character was between 16-19 and pretty dumb, basically a medieval Chad Thundercock. The DM could've said "you didn't even bother to pull it out the last time you fucked her" and I would've not complained.

>>51709571
Quite possible, we got a full description of her stark naked one time.
Her bush was a sparkling mound of purple hair like silk carpet

>>51709674
Had a similar situation in a GoT RPG where my character was raped, and he blew his load in her. She considered having the child to gain political power over the guy as he didn't have any other heirs at that point.

>>51709692
Your DM has good tastes
Pity you never got to explore her dungeon

>>51709711
My guy would probably kill you on spot for comparing him with a rapist t.b.h. but I get your point.

>>51709738
Campaign ain't over yet...

>>51709772
I say go for it anon, become the favored toy of your giant waifu

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two magical girls

to each other

one of them isn't even a magical girl but a brainwashed monster convinced she is through her wife's copious use of mental magic

it is an open relationship

>>51709801
It's not my character who's interested in getting some giant snatch, my character is a Rogue girl who has a crush on the villain.

Not yet, but it's a looming issue for pretty much every PC in this campaign for political and economic reasons. The best way to seal a deal is with a marriage, and every PC is currently eligible.

>>51709754
Didn't end up coming to pass, she took moon tea to end the pregnancy, and cut the guys cock off next time she encountered him.

Two of my PCs got married. It was cute.

They were both played by dudes, and both characters were girls

Somehow it never became awkward, because they were just a kind of quirky couple. Also we use Roll20 and don't use facecams which drasticlaly reduces the awkward.

>>51709856
Ah, nevermind then
Good luck with with your husbando though
Help him hook up with his waifu then

>>51710095
I'm a pretty good wing-man, I try.

>>51708978
My Fighter got married to a barmaid who turned out to be an assassin, which is exactly as crazy as it sounds. Long story short, he's now Darth Vader minus the wife-killing.
On the other hand, they're pretty much perfectly compatible.

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Well, my first character was a human cleric who ended up marrying a kitsune alchemist NPC at the end of the campaign and having a daughter with her, so I guess that counts.

>>51709330
Possibly also counts.

>>51709330
One time my character got captured by a female Drider and when the rest of the party came to rescue him he was all bound in web getting his dick sucked by her.

>>51709873
Noice

>>51710321
Sometimes you've just got to make a point you know?

>>51710292
Didn't know driders even did stuff like that

>>51710650
Seems a bit odd for such a femdom-centric society. Like, fellatio CAN be a dom move in certain circumstances, but right off the bat?

My barbarian-come-princess was on the verge of proposing to a prince of another house to end a war in which bet house was getting its shit wrecked

She actually liked (and had boinked) him before the war started, and it wasn't unfamiliar concept to her; her father had remarried to seal a political alliance with another tribe. It just would have been humiliating to have to sue for peace from a position of weakness (and she had another boy she's still uncertain-but-interested in).

But when the world is at stake and the bbeg is busy manipulating your two houses into gutting each other because he fears you, you gotta do what you gotta do. Thankfully it boiled over and got resolved through uncovering the manipulators before it came to that.

>>51711122
> bet house
Her house, phone posting.

I had a half elven bard in a kings maker game he was converted to daikitsu after a missionary allowed him to speak with the goddess he later had a vision of replacing the entire forest with rice fields he then traveled all the way to tian xia to find someone to help him with this he met a kitsune farmer married her and began his insane plan to replace all of the near by forest with rice fields

>>51708978
I put it in during character creation to avoid magical realming and batman/lone-wolf bullshit backstories.
I usually play it as a dude who already has adult kids and the spouse is managing some buisness while he's away on missions.

Example:
>Wood elf monk who grew up in a monastery with his father.
>Usually sent out on missions since he was young.
>On one mission saves some roguish chick.
>AFewBottlesOfMoonshineLater.jpg
>They now own a herbalist shop in the town managed by the monastery and kids are learning from various teachers.
>PC is the standard dad on buisness trips.
>Always plays things safe and has regular contact routes with family with escape routes from them should someone try to take them hostage.

AAAAAND the DM still tried to kidnapp the whole family...
Didn't work that well for him after the whole group decided to swap out their characters and use the Wife and Kids as their new PC-s.

>Get info that BBEG is trying to kidnap Wife and Kids
>Worriedly chase after him before something happens
>Open the door to the house only to see the oldest son holding him down while the daugter force-feeds the BBEG laxatives and the youngest son is sharpening a stick to impale him Vlad Dracula-style.
>Wife walks out of the kitchen.
>''Honey have you brought the torture devices i asked you to buy?''
>Torturers kit isn the bag of holding so DM starts to sweat even more

And that's how the DM learned not to do shit plot-hooks.

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I had a backstory marriage. Storywise, it worked out quite well. Plotwise, it was supposed to serve as a potential target for the villains, and they nearly got him once.

>>51709491
The enlarge spell / growth potions exist.

>>51711330
That removes all the fun though

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>>51709491
I'd imagine it's one of those strange relationships where fisting equals to gentle clitoral stimulation....

>>51711624
She's still in the Huge category while he's only in the Large category...

>>51711624
You being a freak is a separate problem, anon.

None of my characters have had so much as a date, a peck on the cheek, or handholding (aside from background fluff). I can't even escape reality in my games.

>>51708978
My character is currently the captain of a ship. Duties includes officiating marriages.

"And so, by the power vested in me by this-beginners Maritime Knots manual.."

>>51711822
Can the captain of the ship preside over his own marriage, or does the first mate do that?
What if you're marrying the first mate and captain for some reason? Who presides then?

>>51711685
You have no idea, my good sir.

>>51709330
Had a wizard that married a sphinx and an evil cleric girl building a lesbian harem with a lillend, an angel, tiefling, doppleganger and a couple elves.

>>51708978
I once had someone marry a barbarian lady. That was normal enough, sure, but earlier in the campaign, the party had encountered a race of intelligent, giant spiders that would evolve into an arachne if they ate human flesh, gainly a vague, distorted semblance of the human's memories & personality. The player in question had chosen to keep one of these spiders as a pet. Fortunately, it was still too young & small to wat anybody, but the player made their intentions clear...

>>51712285
*to "eat" anybody

>>51710685
It sounds like something that would get a Drow turned into a Drider...

>>51708978
Never during the course of the game, but in the epilogues I imagine for my characters they often wind up married.

Once to another party member, and once in a MAID game to the Master. But both of those games were cut short. And it's pretty unlikely the MAID game could actually reach that point without destroying the core conceit.

Our Rogue Trader arranged himself a marriage with the sister of the head of a powerful dynasty, but the game got put on indefinite hold (I'm too body with studies to GM, one of the players had a child, and one got a new job, so nobody's schedueles match) before the actual wedding occurred.

Fey Warlock in 5e married to her patron. It's a reluctant relationship for her, and she's adventuring to get away from her husband. Unfortunately to use and gain more power she needs to perform her wifely duties. Her quest is to break the supernatural bond she has to her husband, before he tires of her games and just takes her away.

>>51708978
My current D&D fighter is married to a giantess. He had to move out and live with her. He now has 2 daughters and happily works his farm.

>>51709349
we have a similar event with a frost giant woman who fell in love with our cleric
he doesn't know what to do and he needs help as she seems to want it very bad and he doesn't want to have death by snu snu

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>>51712538
>>51712566
Why are so many people marrying giants? What is this apparently universal appeal?

>>51712644
I think the general idea is that bigger is better.

>>51712644
she fell in love with him and he is not going to say no to a giant that can crush him with little effort

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>>51712644
>not having a size fetish

come on son

>>51712659
Yeah, but... to a point, man.

>>51712538
I just noticed this.
>He now has 2 daughters and happily works his farm.
How? It seems like a giant's ovum would be prepared for spermatazoa the size of cigars.

>>51712679
That's rape, man. That's not a good situation to be in.

>>51711668

>what every game with a female barbarian becomes.jpg

>>51712733
he lives in fear of the snu snu

>>51712690
I want nothing to do with your disgusting perversion. I'll stick with MY disgusting perversion, thank you very much.

>>51712865
Tbhfamalam.

>>51710025
Did the lich attack during the ceremony?

I have another party member that's from a royal family and ran away to prevent an arranged marriage with a huge bitch with a midget fetish. Saying no would mean his kingdom getting fucked over by the other kingdom because high elves are dicks

>>51709330
The party once dressed my kobold up like a hooker and let them get kidnapped by a lizard diddler. Does that count?

>>51712983
...How did you find out he was a lizard diddler in the first place?

>>51712897
I don't quite follow what you mean by that.

>>51712999
Well we didn't find out he was a lizard diddler until after the kobold was kidnapped, we thought he was just a bandit leader.
But after my kobold was kidnapped he tried to diddle the lizard. Not the best of games.

>>51713035
...So what led your party to dress the kobold up as a hooker in the first place?
That seriously demands context.

>>51713010
I speak degenerate negroid. He means "To be honest, family member."

>>51708978
One of my players is playing a noble lord, who is getting married to a noble lady who heads her own noble house. Their marriage conveniently marks a joining of the two noble houses leading the resistance to a brewing war in which both major sides have pledged themselves to a different ancient evil.

>>51713046
I understood the literal transcription, because I'm not so dumb that I think slang and abbreviations are some incomprehensible gibberish that strains my little brain to comprehend and thus act like the problem is not me, the person who can't figure out simple slang and that it must in fact be the people using said semaphore without difficulty. What I mean is "how is that a response to my post".

>>51712733
>>51712644
Well, he saved her from a dragon's hoard. Pretty basic stuff. She just took that as courting and took him home with her. And she's not a bulding sized giantess. She's more of a 3 meters tall amazon kinda gal.

>>51709352
>Star crossed lovers and all that. Except it actually turns out nice.

Star crossed means it DOESN'T turn out nice, you ignoramus. Don't use phrases if you don't know their meaning.

>>51713045
Ok so.
>Need to catch Bandit that's been robbing kobold merchants
>party decides to use kobold as bait
>kobold wants to buy merchant clothes at kobold town nearby
>party "nah fuck that we dont want to deal with those smelly shit lizards"
>We'll use what spare clothing we have
>only one with spare clothing is female cleric
>kobold thinks this terrible idea
>Dm says with the rolls we got and materials we used kobold's disguise makes him look like a dimestore hooker
>Leave him out in an open field with a garbage stuffed backpack to be robbed by bandits.
>gets kidnapped by bandits anyway because their leader is a lizard diddler apparently
>weird attempted lizard diddling ensues

yeah that's about it.

>>51713119
>She's more of a 3 meters tall amazon kinda gal.
See, that I can understand. Not my thing but I get it.

>>51713137
Strictly speaking it just means fate (the stars) is working against (crossing) them. Romeo and Juliet had the misfortune of being in families that hated each other like petulant children, but they still could have had a happy ending if they weren't rash hormonal teenagers.

>>51712566
Load up on con enhancements

If all else fails have a contingent resurrection or five ready

>>51712644
Good tastes?

>>51712733
>How? It seems like a giant's ovum would be prepared for spermatazoa the size of cigars.
Depends on the size difference, a 60ft waifu is a different case than one that's a member of the mile high club by default

>That's rape, man. That's not a good situation to be in.
No that's snu snu
The best kind

>>51712773
See?

>>51713119
>She's more of a 3 meters tall amazon kinda gal.
Not best tastes, but still pretty good

>>51711673
Enlarge him, Reduce her, maybe?

>>51713262
>Good tastes?
No. My tastes are best tastes.

>>51713262
Also, back-of-the-envelope calculation here:
60 foot waifu = 10-11x height or normal human = 1000x the volume of a normal human. A sperm cell weighs roughly 2.2x10^-14g; so a giant's sperm cell would have roughly the mass of a smallish grain of sand. An ovum would weigh about as much as a mosquito.

>>51713321
>No. My tastes are best tastes.
My shit tastes >>> your shit tastes

>>51713458
You take that back, you son of a bitch.

>>51713321
>>51713458
>>51713514
My good tastes >> My shit tastes >> Your good tastes >POWER GAP> Your shit tastes

>>51713560
Everyone here has only shit tastes. And of them all, mine are the best.

>>51713101
I missed a 'This,' at the beginning, anon. I was agreeing with you.

>>51713514
Never
This is becoming much too silly

But on the actual subject of the thread, no not really, despite (I think) him having some options not helped by the one he ended up pining after not being the marrying typeDid end up in a "friends with benefits" (if you can call it that) situation with her along the lines of >>51711668 with an added dose of humiliation whenever the other female PC wasn't available after the campaign though

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>>51711668

>>51712644
Also that giants are, by and by, both intelligent and not evil, unlike most other monstrous humanoids.

>>51710685
It was more a threatening suggestion than sex.

Spiders liquefy and suck out the internal organs of their victims. Her sucking his cock was more a grim suggestion of what she might do had they arrived a little later.

>>51716201
Okay, that's one of the certain circumstances where fellatio can be a dom move.

>>51708978
im my campain we have real life couple that married ingame some time ago...of course we got attacked by demons and we have to beat the crap out of then...the guy is some sort of chosen one that is learning to be the human champion...and the girl is a down to earth sharpshooter and one of the best ever(deserving t since she get mad crits in dice rolls for damage)


Now things getting complicated since the demons are doing the best to corrupt the guy and his pride for being the choosen one is not helping...the DM gonna spend 2 days on a mini campaign with just then...next saturday we gonna know what just happened


they rp kinda like Mai Shiranui an Andy Bogard...kinda silly sometimes

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>>51708978
>literally have a setting about shaman men abstaining from marriage, sex and intimacy from mortal women in order to sustain their magical powers
>they are instead ''married'' to spirit-spouses during their puberty/initiation, frequenting their wives in dreams and accompanied by them in astral trips
>mfw the whole plot of the setting is how one guys spirit-spouse falls in love so desperately with her shamanfu that she tries to enter the waking world but as a result breaches the barrier between the dreaming world and reality and now I can feel the Warp taking over me

>>51713972
source

A couple times.

Most unusual for mine, he got married to the queen of the savanna who was a giraffe lady. It was a convenience marriage which helped the overall goal.

Different one, married to a godly space deity like the size of the solar system. That was weird, and complicated.

>>51712644
Norse mythology remains a driving force in the fantasy genre, after all.

>>51708978
one of my PCs started the game married,

I gave my wife a 5gp sanctified ring that if the wearer took it off or died a duplicate on my PC would crack (it works in reverse too and you know what caused the crack). A blank check for the DM, a safety net just in case he needs me on the rails.

So, campaign starts with us arriving in another continent, leaving her behind in my manor (we started at level 7 with well accomplished backstories, I was a lord)

2 days later (next session) she (and a second PCs wife) is promptly kidnapped by someone from my past (DM added) who has thrown in with the BBEG

Doesn't even use the ring, cleverly sends me her finger in a box with the ring still on, so he had actually kidnapped her before the campaign while I was still on the boat over.

Happy ending though, we rescued her after a few sessions, at which point she went back home, but soon returned with my entire household staff and garrison, to fill the flying castle we just got.
Later when the PCs were busy fighting a god(and running away), she took command of our armys (a world war had been heating up in the campaign so me and 2 other PCs had been recruiting, training, and outfitting personal armys) and destroyed the main force of the enemy. Bravely dying from her wounds while taking down their commander.

Then another god blocked her resurrection, so my character flipped out, Nuked the first gods temple (and cracking the continents mantel) then ate the second gods heart.
oh and I married her for love OP.

There is a wedding coming up in our current campaign. I expect it in the next week or two.

Our party Sorceress is infatuated with the Prince of a small kingdom. We rescued him from some bullshit lair, escorted him back to the Capitol, saved him and his mother from an assassination attempt (shame about the king), then escorted them both to an undermanned keep where we held off an attack from the forest itself (giants, ents, the father and mother of the forest) and then defended it again from a second wave only hours later (a fucking level 19 druid with a shit ton of prep time).

Point is, this royal family owes us big, the Sorceress wants to marry the prince and he can't say no because she's crazy and crazy powerful. They've gotten involved with a party of evil adventurers who've completed their campaign and are looking for shit to do.

We hear wedding bells and the groom has no way out.

>>51713137
You've failed to notice the vital word there, Except.

>>51712644
They're hot?

My sorceress was married before the campaign started, and would occasionally write to her husband, but after a nasty encounter with the BBEG she got a box with her husbands cock in later. So...single woman again!

>>51709330
There's a Poisondusk Lizardfolk in my party who's main goal atm seems to be finding a way to cast Enlarge Person on herself that will last more than a handful of minutes just so she can have her way with my human fighter.

His transition from being "Painfully Generic Chaotic Good Hero Complex" to being "Jaded Cynical Asshole saving the world only because Nobody Else Will" might've had something to do with her developing that crush on him.

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>>51713631

>>51709476
>smearing cum on your vagina to get pregnant

I dont think it works that way

>>51713010
https://youtu.be/g0j2dVuhr6s?t=58s
oh anon, i speak jive

>>51708978

Yeah, my party's Sorceress married her former fiancee's father. They were already having an affair, so she wasn't too disappointed when her beau-to-be died.

Does a affair between a fabolous noble and a bloodthirsty bodyguard/maid count?

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>>51708978

In the next few sessions, in order to get the proper amount of troops for the battle, the players will have to make a diplomatic offering to a Gypsy matriarch by offering to marry one of her daughters/sons. They will have to decide which one of them will get married, or they will have to figure out something else to trade. Otherwise, they'll be going into the battle 2000 men short.

I don't see them as marrying type, or aren't interested in going in blind, so I'll probably make the wife/husband worthwhile, they just have to have the confidence to go into the wedding hardly knowing their new spouse.

If the battle is won, the player who marries into the gypsy family will become the brother in law (once removed) of a king.

Any recommendations, /t/g? I think it will go interestingly, just wanted your thoughts on RPG wifus/husbandos, political marriages, and gypsy bitties.

My current pc is banging his sister.

Everyone is disgusted by this

>>51724528

The popularity of GOT has watered down the shock value of incest forever.

>>51724440
How powerful is the matriarch relative to the rest of the setting?

A spiritualist whose dedication phantom is his kobold childhood BFF that got slaughtered along with her village when they were younger. She ended up becoming his phantom, aaaaaand they wound up falling in love during their quest to track down and murder the entire platoon of soldiers who did it.

He wears both wedding rings.

>>51724832

She dominates a low-value region of the country, a northern desert. She's the head of a Gypsy family and comands roughly 2000 soldiers. The players are helping a lower king of an adjacent region re-take the land from the matriarchs nephew, who has 6000 troops, and protects a liche. So in this quiet corner of the world, she's one of the powerful factions. However, in terms of the population centers at the other corners of the continent, they are all pretty dwarfed. (The players have been through cities with retinues bigger than the battle they have ahead of them, they just won't get involved in a war so far from home.)

>>51725149
> Kobolds
Disgusting.

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>>51723084
Cuckoldry
>>51724528
Incest

Please take a long walk off a short cliff.

>>51725338
>Not liking Kobold waifus/husbandos

Go >>>/out/ and stay >>>/out/

>>51725283
How mysticy is the gypsy kingdom? Id normally make a political marriage of a kingdom member (That is not intended to punish the players) be of a person who represents that country the best.

>>51725474
Fuck I never remember the damn trip thing.

>>51725465
Husbandos maybe. Waifus? You are lost to civilization. Please retreat to meditate upon your flaws, preferably somewhere remote where your deviant mores will not disturb others.

>>51725474

Pretty mysticy. They aren't uncomfortable with spirits and slightly dark magic, although they still have a concept of good and evil that matches the rest of the world (all of them are slightly witches, and have some kind of connection to spells, palm readings, alchemy, ect.) This allowed Keirnan (Evil gypsy) to be okay with allying with a liche, and Magdara (Good/but pragmatic gypsy) to be a powerful witch, but still oppose the liche, and is open to warring against her cousin.

>>51713409
This assumes cell volume scales up with body size instead of number of cells increasing. Since sperm and ovum are both single cells they could easily be human sized. If I weren't at work I'd look up the size of whale germ line cells

>>51722594
The DM mentioned he based it on a real life case, that was proven with DNA and all. He even mentioned the name, but I suck at celebrities knowledge.

>>51725581
Have them be a strong enchanter then and can turn, with a pseudonecromancy, loot from powerful enemies into magic items that only work for the person who slayed the figure.

So husband goes off to war, fights liche, liche isnt the final boss ans the guy comes back with his sword. Swords now enchanted to bane and terrify the fuck out of undead because the wife enchanted it as such.

Makes all the hard fights a little more special.

>>51722594
>>51725636

I mean, it can... doesn't mean it's a particularly GOOD way to get pregnant. Any seminal discharge near the vagina can result in a pregnancy, there's just a good reason the penis goes into the vagina to reproduce.

>>51725691

I like the smith idea. The pseudonecrimancy isn't a bad idea, but it's a bit game-y for my taste. I'm trying to think of benefits that are not loot based as well.

>>51725803
Well the thing is crafting is always something that takes strict penalties for a pc to do but the other stuff like healing and raises, arent strictly hard to get.

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>>51709005
>>51709298

You guys are just amateurs. Let me break it down for y'all

>decide to create an elf wizard for a game being run by my regular DM in a homebrew setting
>get to talking with him about Elf society before the game starts
>suggest that to shake things up from the usual Tolkien-ripoff elves to give the Elves a somewhat unique culture, thus the elven caste system is born
>castes are fairly rigid but there are ways to rise in caste, for example increasing in fame as a wizard
>when creating my wizard I note that he is in love with ---and loved by-- an elvish woman of a higher caste so they can't be together unless he's able to rise in caste
>the DM now has a plot hook that isn't just PUT PRINCESS IN CASTLE

My DM is a recovering SJWfag so I knew he'd bite, now I have a cute elf waifu and it's more interesting for him to hold on to that caste system plot hook than it is for him to, for instance, kill her for drama

I played a rather frigid female warrior. Not my choice, random dice roll made her rather cold in personality.

She fell in love with the Big Villain of the setting and decided to do nothing during the last confrontation. The big villain decided to spare the party after defeat as an engagement present.

They rode off into the sunset, both quite happy and looking forward to a fairly blissful relationship.

Funny enough, both me and the DM decided on this ending simultaneously and independently. It was the only thing that made sense at that point.

>>51725968

As a GM, I appreciate players who do this, albeit no excessive detail, and I will do with the story what I want.

>>51726140
There is a kickstarter tabletop i know that gives the players initial authority on how their race works culture wise, with ultimate reject authority by the gm of course. I always found it a nifty trick to use for the initial stages of freeform games since pcs like it when their stuff is used and it saves you work.

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>>51712644
They're in the category of physically dangerous monsters, but they're close enough to human that a relationship could work.

>>51708978
In one game a married a fabled sea serpent that was the scourge of the world's oceans and a terror to sailors. It's less weird than it seems since I was also a sea serpent, but much smaller due to a growth condition causing me to cap oUT around 10 meters and lead a life running a travelling carnival / adventuring party. Mostly perused the marriage to get more power to back my political aspirations.

>>51726206

huh, cool. Don't know If I need a system for it, would just need to PC's to do a bit of work. It's a interesting thing to consider. I'm more excited about a PC coming up with intimate relasionships pre-game.

>>51726309
Well the way that game worked was it was dmless.

The trick is there are humans, dwarves, elves, orcs, each player can be one of these and the other pc gets to be the BIG BAD.

They then compete against each other, with each only being allowed to use specific moves like forging the Anti Bad item, which will require you to do something like destroy something pure in this world never to be seen again.

So Lord Grapthar Dragonthrone can be warded by a ring that as a consequence of its forging, the color purple no longer exists.

I played a steampunk game at a con where my gentleman PC had to marry a dedicated yet minxish clerk after she tricked him into doing something... ungentlemanly. We were married beneath a Martian tripod, and my Martian bodyguard Roger of Mars wept openly (apparently, he always cries at weddings)

>>51709012
go on
purely for the comedy of it

>>51726305
What the heck kind of game was that?

>>51709012
go on... what happend then?
did the cleric give in to undead beuty?

>>51708978

I once played a Dragonblooded character in an Exalted game that had had an arranged marriage to another one of the PCs. They did come to actually love each other even though that is not really a requirement in family maneuvering aristocratic marriages among Dragonblood families.

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>>51727902
Pathfinder. I was playing a custom race to recreate a character from a fantasycraft game that got cut short due to the GM having to deal with real life shit. He was absolutely useless in combat other than buffing people, but had an adopted human daughter to kick ass for him. The other PC's were all part of his carnival as he convinced people he was a nobleman from beneath the sea, and generally went around swindling people out of their money. The sea serpent he was courting was originally made up by the random drunken ramblings of our swashbuckler and was basically his white whale. Game ended with snek becoming the god of capatilism, greed, and following contracts to the letter, but not the intent. He did end up marrying giant snek.

Played a female Zen Archer follower of Irori in the Pathfinder : Wrath of the Righteous adventure path. Married Arueshalae, out of both love and enormous respect for the demon that decided to become something better.

>>51708978

I had a character of mine marry the local lord's daughter. It was the bonus attached to becoming the local marshal.

>>51708978
In one game I played a noble paladin who was 12th in line for the title of lordship. It was a very fun place to take him as, up until this point, he was a lovable oaf who just wanted to best his older brothers in martial skill. We had long surpassed his siblings in power, us being around level 12-15 (I was lvl 15, only party member who hadn't died). Lo and behold, my paladin's father had betrothed him to the 13th daughter of a much, much stronger noble house. My paladin had gotten fairly famous and this marriage would have benefited his family and the people in all of his family's holdings, so he had no choice but to agree.

As it predictably played out, this noble house had made deals with evil forces, one of the many results of these dealings was a curse on their 13th daughter to lose her soul should she ever lose her virginity. Of course, no one told my paladin this and, despite being naked and unarmed, managed to put up a decent fight on his wedding night when the demon came to collect. Alas, my paladin was bested, his lawfully wedded wife was whisked away to hell, and the powerful noble family was up in arms with accusations of this lesser noble house being the cause for their daughter's plight. Nevermind that this lesser noble house had produced 7 paladins from 12 boys, but I digress.

Over the course of a long adventure into hell itself, my paladin rescued his wife, slew the deal-master of a demon during their rematch, and took the heat off of his house. While my paladin did not seek revenge, the powerful noble house quickly found their power waning with their evil benefactor slain. His wife still, despite all sorts of tests and purification, pinged evil but we never got to straighten that plot point out.

Shame, I thought for sure that my paladin had married an arch demon as he was level 18 at the end of this campaign and I couldn't see anything else able to stand against the party.

>>51732428
>pinged evil but we never got to straighten that plot point out.
>, I thought for sure that my paladin had married an arch demon
How do you know he didn't?
Or at least a minor demon

>>51727485
>>51729360
Well, he got her naked in bed and pretty much...ready to go. When he caught on that she was undead.

He was a spellcaster, so surprisingly she did fairly well for herself because he had no spells prepared.

She hit him in the face with a bedside candleholder and knocked him off of her, thus avoiding getting her little dead ass tapped, and escaped stark naked into the rest of the castle, while the rest of the party was carrying out the plan that her marriage was a diversion for in the first place.

>>51708978
Yes, an NPC nurse in Dark Heresy. She makes for a good cover identity and she helps raising the toddler my PC has saved on the zombie outbreak on that ice planet (published scenario).

>>51708978

Not my PC, but one of the party members. She was the reincarnation of Tatayana, and she married Strahd. I think that sort of defeats the entire point of the Ravenloft setting, however, but some players really don't care about the themes of the game.

>>51708978
Mine ended up marrying a villain.

>>51737148
Once killed one of our villains by stabbing her in the head while she was giving a party member a blow job.

>>51737172
Wouldn't that have caused her to bite down?

>>51709005
This is what I did this last time. It's a good way to signal that you're cool with your character's death if he's got a family and could plausibly retire someday to spend time with them.

>>51709012
Did he jam it in anyways, for the good of the realm?

>>51709107
Probably going to get cucked anyway, when she meets a more interesting, available man

>>51709033
Blood bond might count, but Amaranth is weird and gross. Very offensive, even if it's with a cute Salubri.

>>51709033
That's like asking if eating your opponent's hearth to take their strenght counts. The awnser is yes.

>>51709130
This sounds cute. Any more deets?

>>51725712
I know, the DM could've just said that I fucked her and didn't pull it out in time. It would've been in character to not give a fuck.

But I guess he wanted us all to know about the new curious thing he learned. DMs do that, it's part of the fun of DMing. It's okay, he's a great guy.

>>51709349
>best giant type
>outdoor bathing
>delicious snowy environment

She was tailor-made for romance. I'm phenomenally jealous.

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My friend's parents are live action roleplayers. I've managed to play with them and marry his mother somehow.

>>51709491
Enlarge one, reduce the other, meet in the middle for some Large-sized rutting

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>>51709692

>>51710685
>>51710650
Maybe it was a drider (male)

>>51712511
I like it. Abusive relationship with power disparity is good drama.

>>51737364
The DM was very skilled at quite lovely characters.

Female DM, and she could also turn on the husky voice pretty well.

>>51708978
My lesser noble duelist married two female bodygards (twins) of his lord while drunke on some island. Part of the next adventure was getting the Lords permission for a discrete divorce. Much fun to be had

>>51737267
She survived her encounter virginal, just fought a long naked battle,

>>51725283
Make sure this gypsy bride is super cute

>>51727217
>something... ungentlemanly.

Was it butt stuff?

>>51736261
Wait...she didn't want to get her dead ass tapped?

>>51737323
I've seen the full account of the events posted before. Basically, anon was playing a bookish half-elf warlock who had made a pact with an eldritch being (not a particularly evil one, but still weird and alien). The character ended up getting romantically involved with another player's female paladin, and at some point they boinked. Unfortunately, the warlock's patron had been wanting a presence in the physical world and decided to pull a Yog-Sothot and use the warlock to impregnate the paladin with his spawn. Cue everybody being confused and horrified as the paladin woke up to find herself extremely pregnant. Whole thing turned out well, though, after the warlock got his patron to apologise and explain what was going on, and the paladin soon gave birth to cute glowy betentacled babies.

>>51737585
The subject of her sexual activity has long been a running joke of the campaign. She's eternally about 17, so her sexual emotions must have been at their strongest when she died. Some said she'd lose those urges when she became undead, others theorize that she must be in a Velma-like state of perpetual nerd girl suppressed horniness.

>>51737493
>The DM was very skilled at quite lovely characters

Any other examples you could share?

>>51737591
Odd, but cute

>>51737665
One particularly memorable was a recurring antagonist, a Cambion girl.

When we first met her she was a fighter, teenaged, impulsive, lashing out.

Gorgeous little thing, slim and wiry, firey red skin and long red hair. She attacked us highwayman style, dressed in little more than street rags, and got her ass soundly whooped. We took a vote on whether to tie her up and turn her in, or slit her throat, and we ended up sparing her.

She would turn up way later in the campaign, having mastered her art (lvling up a shitload) and launching an attack on our healer when he were separated from the rest of the group.

Her downfall was basically her overconfidence, and our monk tricked her into fighting him one on one, by his rules. which was unarmed and naked.

The bitch would have probably killed us all if the fight had continued normally, but she accepted the challenge, and we all watched as her and our monk stripped and went at it to the death.

His vow of non-violence forbade him from actually delivering the killing blow though, and instead we bound her and she travelled with us a prisoner for a while.

The sort of personality she had was of the DM's most memorable. She was always talking, hardheaded and over confident, but also a teenager, so naive and impressionable still. She developed a crush on our paladin as the campaign went on, and was staying of her own free will by a long time later.

>>51737638
I'd vote for that second one. It's much funnier.

>>51737790
I've played her like that a few times. Situations where our sexy ranger has been shirtless have her flustered and thankful she can't blush.

>>51737723
Cute. Did her fiend parent ever get involved?

>>51737802
Yes! Her mother was a major boss fight, Succubus mastermind behind a magic item stealing thieves guild.

>>51737802
>>51737665
Another one that was prominently naked was an unseelie nymph we dealt with a few times.

Her skin was a soft teal colour, with her eyes and lips all smoky and dark, pupils black as night, and her hair moved in waves like fire, the colour of autumn leaves. Looking directly at her cunt too long caused psychic damage.

>>51737939
>>51737835
Ha! That's pretty wild. Some Anons have all the luck.

>>51738095
A good DM is all you need. Ours was great (and she actually went on to teach Drama and creative writing, so she was basically a perfect fit for the role)

>>51718305
I like this concept

>>51737493
I want in your game

>>51737373
Have u fug

>>51719312
I'm going to need details about both, because this headache doesn't let me understand either.

>>51722391
How small is she?

>>51738106
Sounds cute. Is she married?

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>>51738106
One day I hope to become a Good DM. I just can't always visualize detail enough to adequately describe it. Don't even really dream in color or with faces beyond single important characters, so it's tough to paint mental pictures.

>>51745355
Keep it up anon, practice writing things and describing shit, you'll learn how to do ot

>>51708978
No, but my character has considered marrying a pegasus for magic-induced reasons.

>>51748465
please explain

I have a player that likes marrying and otherwise forming lasting romances with NPC's

I try to balance it by having the girl be romanced, but not exactly being fallen over him

Yeah, there was one. The group's slutface pulled from a Deck of Many Things and, by the fates, had to by the end of our adventure get married to a woman in a far away city.

The end of our campaign before the GM had to leave was us executing an Oceans 11 heist to feign her death and escape the wedding. It was cool.

Group arrived in a totally-not-arabian-nights port city at one end of the totally-not-suez-canal. As adventurers are want to do, we totally fucked up the existing power structure and ended up tangled up in the plans of an organized crime family. We're in hot water, and an elf sorceress who is the local head of this crime syndicate's operations has cornered two members of our group, our cleric and me, a rogue. While all four of us could take her, two alone probably can't.

The cleric decides to try to sweet talk his way out. In ends up succeeding beyond all expectations, especially his own, and inadvertently ends up seducing the sorceress. She falls head over heels for the cleric, and starts imagining some grand, romantic relationship between the two, and we make a run for it while she's daydreaming.

This comes back to bite us a bit later, when it turns out the reason that there's a powerful sorceress running a local branch of a crime syndicate who is somehow naive enough to fall for some honeyed words and a kind smile is that she's actually not an elf. She's a blue dragon. More specifically, she's the dragon equivalent of a teenager, and is an heiress in what's essentially a blue dragon mafia.

Now, the other blue dragons don't really think much of mortal customs like marriage, but their precious little sister now wants the whole romantic package deal, complete with storybook wedding, and so damn it that's what she'll get.

So now the cleric is being forced into a shotgun wedding with a teenage dragon mafia princess.

>>51748875
It was a Savage Worlds of My Little Pony game and I was mind controlled into megalomania.

Just fucking with you I'm a different person

>>51748243
I do, but it's still rough sometimes. Describing faces is the worst. Without reference to another, existing face or set of faces combined, I'm hopeless. Thankfully, for now my players don't ask for facial details, but I'm always paranoid that one of them will get sweet on an NPC and seek a better description.

>>51737939
> Looking directly at her cunt too long caused psychic damage.
Ha! Joke's on you, I was staring at her tits the whole time!

>>51737545

Well, naturally.
>What about a gypsy man? How great will his mustache be?

>>51737591
It's a weird feeling when someone else is able to remember a story you've posted before.

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>>51738436

In hindsight my setting is one huge Paprika rip-off

>>51709357
Natch.

>>51741891
First one standard fare fantasy, though taking place in sort of Not-Africa. For the benefit of better relations with the animal people, my human character went through with a marriage to the Queen of the Savanna, a giraffe lady. Although it was a political match, they came to actually love one another and get on well.

The other one, guy was adrift in space and basically ended up bumping into a sleeping ancient space diety about the effective size of our solar system. It became obsessed with him since it had never encountered life before, and overtime changed to accomodate him. After long enough those accomodations led to being a lady and wanting a relationship. It was weird, but also an interesting way to start a setting for a following game, on part of the DM. Basically;

>Astronaut lost in space randomly collides with God
>God, previously bored with just creating and shaping lifeless stellar bodies, is amazed at this new living thing
>Rekindled interest in godly pursuits, creates a galaxy and then a world within, as a controlled environment to study and interact with this thing
>Becomes obsessive and starts to shape self to suit the thing, leading to gaining emotions and among others, falls in love
>Runs wild with filling the world with life now, using the thing as a template

It also worked as to why only this world in this galaxy had life, at least to start with.

>>51741891
PD Lizardfolk are small-sized acording to the MM.

The one time she managed to have Enlarge Person cast on her the most she got was a dance with my (roofied)fighter before she went back to her hobbit size.

For her, the dance was amazing. For my fighter, it was a bad acid trip.

>>51708978
I played two different clerics in two campaigns by different DMs in the same setting. I didn't want to deal with one DM trying to play matchmaker with one of them, so I declared that they made a Bakuman style agreement when they were younger. So once the campaigns ended they got married, bought a farm, and lived a quiet life together.

>>51725968
>and it's more interesting for him to hold on to that caste system plot hook than it is for him to, for instance, kill her for drama
For as long as your character is unworthy of his beloved, sure. As soon as that starts to change, so too does the woman's safety.

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>>51712644
It's easy to get fixated.

>>51711668
Source you magnificent faggot.

>>51756682
>Don't stare, your mind fixates, next thing you're cruising some real weird chat rooms
They've made similar jokes several times now

>MFW writers know exactly what sort of fetishes their characters inspire

>>51745336
She is! She's also gay

>>51752873
>Teenage Dragon Mafia Princess

Fuck me if that doesn't sound like an anime

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>>51752873
Unrequited and naive love/lust with a huge power imbalance is one hundred percent my fetish, holy shit. Not so sure about the teenage or dragon things, but I could work with them. I hope your cleric is counting his blessings, especially since now he'll be part of a mafia family.

>>51758142
Also sounds like best waifu to me

>>51708978
My OD in an Ad Eva game ended up married to a pilot. She turned out to be Adam, but we worked it out.

We also adopted a separate pilot who was about her age.

Good ending, overall.

>>51737283
>>51737313
It was actually preferable alternative at that point, even for her.
>PC is Gangrel monk
>antagonist is Toreador diabolist pacted with devil
>learned some nasty witchcraft but at Final Death her soul is forfeit to the devil forever
>get her cornered after various shenanigans, time to put her down
>have epiphany, explain that even for one such as her it's never too late for God's mercy
>she brings up the whole sold-soul-to-devil thing
>assure that even that can be overcome
>she renounces devil and swears to seek redemption with God
>check with ST if she really means it, turns out she does, ST likes the roleplay here but I can't really break the pact
>point out that devil can't take her soul if I take it first
>lose 2 points of Road, get Derangement (Split Personality), Generation and access to her Disciplines
>now there's artsy slut living in my head
>also I'm one nasty can of whoopass because Protean and Celerity were never meant to be used together

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>>51756694
Love / Hate Letter

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>>51735434
Might have been a minor demon, but I can't see any demon besides an arch demon scheming this hard to get out of hell. The party was a few levels away from epic levels as well so a single generic demon of any kind wouldn't last a round against my paladin, let alone the entire party. Also my GM had a hard-on for arch demons and, in the PF world, the entire campaign fit the bill of one of the arch demons perfectly.

http://www.d20pfsrd.com/bestiary/monster-listings/outsiders-2/devil/devils-unique/devil-demoriel-twice-exiled-seductress-tohc/

>>51753653
I'm a firm believer in the booty, myself

>>51758015
Cute. I bet she's making some lucky girl real happy.

>>51762943
This is almost cute. It'll shift to cute as long as your Storyteller doesn't run it as slowly obliterating the soul, because that's just gross.

>>51713409
>>51725606
cells are basically the same size from what i can find. its not proportional. Only in comparatively rare cases are the egg and sperm not on the microscopic scale.

>>51711764
I honestly feel skeezed out by PC romance, because I can't get over the fact it's 2 sweaty guys with neckbeards pretending to be someone else to have steamy cybersex.

>>51763914
It's about telling a story, bruh, not erping with your boyfriends.

What makes a good story?

>>51708978
My character got married to another PC.

They had lots of cute kids.

>>51764419
Are you those pcs that one autist was bitching about ruining his plot?

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>>51712923

>>51713172
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=YmIaL2BK1Zk

>>51764487
Probably not. Games don't happen that fast.

>>51764487
Probably not, the only other person in that party that browses 4chan liked the game.

>>51708978
Of course. It is expected of the noble class to marry and produce offspring to carry the legacy. It's like you don't even Pendragon.

>>51711668
Belligerent Betty was a half-orc barbarian born to a orcish barbarian(mother) and a human fighter(father). He was conscripted into the marriage as a prize won by her mother. When she came of age, she was given her mother's old adventuring equipment and told she must go out on her own to find herself a husband and raise a family of her own.

Betty had a thing for small men. The smaller the better. She was not pretty by any real standard, but she believed she was beautiful and if anyone said otherwise, they ahd a fight on their hands.

Betty meets a young half-ling rogue who can talk his way out of anything and oozed charisma. It was his downfall. Betty was instantly attracted to him and pursued him relentlessly. The halfling knew he could not tell her the truth about how utterly unattractive she was so he kept playing along and feeding her ego. Every time he screwed up and upset her, he had to double down or fear being torn asunder. His ability to escape was not his strong suit as a rogue, oddly enough, and he was a failed ranger at that.

Betty claimed him and they were happily, so far as she was concerned, married. They had seven children. The halfling did profit from the union however. Betty was the best brute he ever had and he was able to open his casino where he raked in enough money to replace his shattered pelvis with one made of adamantine. Spared no expense.

>>51764866
A love story for the generations.

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>>51759654
>somebody saved and posted it
w-why, a-anon...

>>51764602
Are you fellas talking about me again?

>>51708978
I haven't been able to play any role playing games much to my dismay. How the fuck do I get started?!

>>51765263
Where do you live and why aren't you running a game?

>>51765559
I don't know how to run one and if I did, I would know where to find people to play. My bro does, but he has the same problem of not knowing where to find people to play. We live on a college campus in Texas though, just so you know.

>>51765875
>college campus
YOU ARE LITERALLY SURROUNDED BY PEOPLE WHO HAVE THE ATTENTION SPAN TO READ TEXTBOOKS AND/OR RULEBOOKS
Admittedly, that's not even close to everyone on your campus, but it's a pretty dense concentration. Check out if you have any local game stores that run weekly/monthly games, or if you have a campus game group.

If all else fails, show up in sup/tg/ chat and say you're willing to run a game if people will put up with you being new. Game thirst is usually ubiquitous and unceasing.

>>51708978
Once had a human fighter settle down with a she-elf ranger who had managed to almost kill the rest of the party on her own. He wasn't even level two yet. Now he's just sorta a suburban dad/handyman-neighbor-guy because he isn't the one bringing home most of the money.

I later played their half-elf son, who wanted to finish what his father started.

Two. Ultra-violent psycho with control over plants (what do you call someone with control over plants, anyway? Hortimancer?) who fancied herself a vigilante and liked horribly tearing apart monsters and evil assholes married a vampire capable of destroying most physical things via shattering the atomic bonds/cores. This was after a lengthy campaign that basically un-psycho'd the vigilante and stripped her of her violent impulses and trauma.

Same RP, a vagrant empath with an ability that was basically Charm (basically making people's subconscious think they weren't there) married said vigilante's gatekeeper, who she fled with when the vigilante's sanity shattered after trying to kill one of the local powerful priests in an attempt to draw out the creature who nearly killed the vampire.

yes, it was 2hu

OH
I just remembered

I played a mega-moe imperial psyker at one point in a Dark Heresy game. Absolutely faithful, totally submissive, considered herself mutant filth and infinitely thankful for the chance to earn some measure of redemption in the Emperor's service.

Another player played a rough-and-tumble scum from some medieval-ish world and seemed to instantly crush on her. And being self-loathing and utterly unfamiliar to kidness or flattery or care, he seduced her effortlessly (with every indication of actually loving her).

The game didn't finish, but the player fantasized to me about him taking her with him when he returned home to his frontier world, to go back to his shady dubious-legality underworld, probably as a boss and mover-shaker rather than mere street rat he'd left as, and his templar calix waifu/psyker bodyguard/seer serving as his right-hand enforcer and queen.

That was kind of cute.

>>51720612

If the King was taken out by Assassin, is this Prince she's marrying not the new King? Or does he have older brothers/a non-primogenitorial system of succession?

>>51766200
Did she force him to marry her, or did he woo her in an attempt to survive?

>>51766166
>college students
>large attentions spans

you can only have 1 anon.

>>51759654
>that pic
I love it when a story gets a happy ending.

>>51758142
I'd watch it.

>>51708978
I had a happily married character in VtM (his wife was his Ghoul, and it wasn't clear if she loved him or was just enslaved by bloodbonds, though he was convinced it's true love). I knew it was a huge target on my head, and spent entire agme waiting for GM do drop the hammer and crush my character's feelings by unloading something horryfingly tragic on his wife. It didn't happen, which was really shocking, considering how GM made our unlives a (very interesting and exciting) living hell.

>>51709012
Arranged mariages, huh. Always look under the veil before you say 'I do'.

>>51759654
The cleric is more concerned with not giving the dragon's eldest brother, who correctly believes that the cleric is just some random adventurer who seduced his baby sister for temporary advantage, a chance to kill him. For now he's being restrained by the fact that his sister is super attached to the cleric and killing him would probably make her sad. So the brother is currently waiting for the cleric to slip up, since every relationship will have its ups and downs, and when his sister's infatuation with the cleric wanes enough he'll move in and stomp him.

The dragon girl, however, is totally oblivious to all of this and is loving the chance to be the innocent damsel swept off her feet by the noble hero even though she a) could crush said noble hero, and b) is a local mafia leader who regularly orders all sort of nasty stuff and has probably killed tons of people personally.

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>>51765875
Which campus, boy?

we have our paladin being married to an ogre chieftain after a very amusing hunt for a bandit king

>>51769039
Cleric better keep his waifu happy

>>51769039
Obviously he needs to take the dragon girl on one of the adventures and show her the beauty of hero work is better than mob stuff.

It's time to get romantic.

>>51766765
The second into the first, but he didn't mind the security that came with a wife that strong.

>playing male half elf bard
>playing kingsmaker
>is the grand diplomat
>DM tells us we're paying a lot of gold to frost giants in tribute
>go meet frost giants to work out better deal
>notice these guys are walking siege machines
>meet jarl and his daughter
>realize if I marry his daughter I can get that army
>lie to Jarl and tell him I'm in love with his daughter
>I can tell the DM didn't plan for this
>Jarl tells me if I want to marry her I need to beat him in a duel he says no magic
>I egg him on asking why is he so scared of magic and junk
>he allows magic
>I literally just charm the dude and make him say I surrender
>Daughter thinks Jarl is joking when he says we have to marry
>she tells me I look like a tiny woman

>>51708978
my warlock ended falling for a paladin chick their children? 3 little doom guy's killing all demons it was a funny end

>>51774634
Well, you do.

>>51774634
>I ask party for help making her love me
>we stage a huge fight where I win
>waifu starts to like me but not respect me
>Waifu gives me "pretty human clothes" they're literally just dresses don't know the DM thinks it's so funny
>I wear the dresses
>party wizard mocks me for it waifu goes ape shit on him
>wedding starts they tell me to kiss the bride DM tries to fuck with me more by making me climb to her lips
>I climb to her lips

>>51774787
>I bring waifu back to our capital
>waifu continues to call me her pretty little woman long after it's funny
>any time I try to wear clothes my waifu didn't bring me she gets dangerously mad
>continue to adventure in drag anytime anyone tries to mock me the wizard explains why that's a bad idea
>Our ruler wants us to hurry and have heirs before we get too old
>find suitors for the party
>I later find out half elf plus frost giant does not equal baby
>waifu so disappointed tries to commit seppuku
>tell wizard I helped get him mad puss puss and saved his life he owes me
>tells me has no way to help me

>>51775081
>I'm out sick for a session
>come back wizard tells me he found a solution
>pulls out a bloated corpse of an half elf infant
>give him a weird look
>He tells me it's his bastard
>give him a stranger look
>later found out they found it near their favorite brothel
>they cast res on the baby ruler gets mad at us for wasting money
>wizard paints the baby blue
>use a magic ring that increases the infants size ruler now ever more angry
>rogue sneaks and places the baby on waifu's altar for her crazy ass giant god
>waifu thinks baby is a gift from the gods
>we raise the baby
>still wonder why we didn't just go to the orphanage
>moral of the story don't marry giants or you'll end up dressing in drag and raising a son that isn't yours

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>>51708978
My DM does it pretty much all the damn time. He runs basic games with us to introduce new players to DnD, using the usual group as a way for the newcomers to follow if they get lost.

As a twist, he takes whatever characters we roll and connects us to one of the campaign's NPCs, culminating in crazy relationships, jaded lovers, and shotgun marriages

Craziest one I had was when we were playing Hoard of the Dragon Queen with a few new players, and Rezmir was all tsundere for my character.

>>51774742
lies

>>51775402
> black half dragon
That sounds like a recipe for tears

>>51775372
>Cuckfinder

>>51775402
>>51777264
Blacks are cute because they're so spiteful and grumpy

>>51779159
I mean, if you're in to acid and bdsm.

>>51779243
Who isn't?

>tfw I was the something unusual
Being half-mermish isn't all bad, I guess.

>>51777264
Actually it was surprisingly fun. She survived Hoard of the Dragons, retreating and vowing to 'get me properly next time'.

And then wound up helping the party in Rise of Tiamat, and near the end of the campaign we got hitched. It could have easily gone the wrong way but the DM managed to make it feel cute, and kept it from going from 'this is funny' to 'dare you enter my magical realm' levels of weird.

Last year I played a Barbarian called Bernard The Barbarian, 15 Int, disciple of Pythagore's triangle for giggles and shit, turned up deadknight.

Rescued young Naga (was supposed to be an encounter) bring her back to her family of Nagas. She want to follow us because party is kinda into evil shit.

Give her a nice polymorph ring, she basically raped me 5 minutes after (naga chick digs rings).

Polymorph myself after a couple weeks into a naga and bring ostrich's eggs to future mother-in-law, she approved.

End up marrying a naga, having 3 babies (necropolitan-polymorphing-snaky-babies).

Unlive was good.

>>51708978
>dnd 5e
>playing adapted/expanded ravenloft before official book came out
>have done all the major strahd stuff, now going to other regions
>come across group of naked women (nymphs) in a forest clearing
>since we were playing ravenloft, everyone is EXTREMELY SUSPICIOUS but we're keeping it together in-character; people are going along with what the mute pretty ladies want as far as is reasonable (they don't like metal, we agree to put all our stuff away)
>important to note, each of the characters sees the nymphs as what the character would find attractive
>me, playing half-orc fighter, tribal leader badass kind of guy sees lots of orc/half-orc women. Suddenly see an in-character way out of a potentially shitty trick, and comment on how "I didn't know so-and-so liked half-orc women" as nymphs are fawning all over my comrade
>DM gets upset- not because I found a loophole in his ruse, but rather he was actually trying to give us a pleasant break from all the spooks
>smooth things out, decide to just roll with it
>half-orc fucks some nymph chicks in the hot-tub, ponchos provided for those in the splash zone
>have my favorite nymph engage in some playful hand-to-hand combat, determine she's the strongest
>declare her my wife, cleric half-asses a ceremony probably while getting a blow job

>eventually, have to continue on our sick quests
>nymphs don't want us to leave
>my wife, in fact, turns into a giant angry tree and chases us as we try to move on
>hastily declare her sovereign of this land in my stead as we haul ass away from angry nymphs

>>51781232
See I can't help but think you gave her the polymorph ring for actual tactical purposes, and then she suddenly, out of the blue, just raped your shit up.

>>51763241
I actually had a massive crush on her girlfriend when I was in high school. Leggy Scottish chick with red hair. Hnngh. Unrequited love guys.

Pretty much, she was suppose to use buttload of wind and water spell to make our ship goes faster on the sea...because we were pirate.

She was a sea Naga afterall.

>>51784562
Much like with traditional games, sometimes you don't need to participate to have fun - it can be quite enjoyable to just watch.

>>51787586
Did she not?

>>51787618

Well, yes she did.

>>51708978

There's a particular campaign I've run quite a few times, where the players are modern-day knights serving a religious order. The opening scenario (and combat tutorial) are the players moving in to support a group of holy songstresses known as the Quintet as they battle a werewolf.

This is usually when I can tell if a romantic subplot is going to 'work', and it can be milked for all the drama possible. The climax of one campaign had a villain abduct the tomboyish leader of the group with the intention of making her his bride, so that the marriage could be used to metaphysically summon up his demonic aspect from Hell.

The players had to fight their way to the top of a skyscraper to disrupt the wedding. Fortunately, they got there early. After a savage duel to the death, the PC kicked open to door to find that his love interest - in her bridal gown - had managed to prise open the window, and was working up the courage to jump.

When she saw him, she broke down into tears and sobbed that she'd been utterly terrified that it would be the villain instead. He promptly kissed her and asked her to marry him, which I thought was a stroke of genius. She was already all dolled up for the wedding, no less!

Engaged to a sorceress in fantasy spain during the inquisition, because her family would have lynched me for staining her honor otheriwse

>>51789942
That sounds excellent and natural.
Good on you.

>>51708978
One of my players entered into a bare knuckle boxing fight with a Goliath woman last session. He screamed at her that if he won the fight, she'd have to marry him. She deemed that if she won she'd get to kill him. He threw her off a cliff.

Their marriage was held in a lovely Elven forest grove.

>>51790811
And she agreed to those terms?
I mean, what kind of fucked-up foreplay is that?
Reminds me of how as a backstory element one of my character's parents met when she was torturing him, an enemy spy, for information, and was impressed by how much punishment he could take.
The character had an ...interesting perspective on relationships.

>>51708978
Well, he has a wife and 2 daughters. His wife is the head of his tribe, he's the shaman, and his parents help raise the kids while he's off saving the world.
Also they're all monstrous werewolf-like creatures

>>51765177
Not that guy, but I've seen it posted lots. Good story.

>>51787608
I would write a 5000 word essay on why it would make my life better if they'd let me watch, believe me.

>>51790811
I had a similar situation with a one-on-one combat with an enemy warrior woman in our campaign. This recurring villain blackguard chick. She challenged my fighter to single combat, and if he lost, the battle would be hers, and so my fighter offered the counter that if he won, she'd have to fuck him,

He won.

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>>51712644
>tfw Mister Metokur equated giantess porn with babyfurs, inflation, and vore

It's such a simple to understand fetish. A fucking child could think it up. Big girls = big boobs/butts, bam. I don't even consider it a fetish proper, it's something a lot of guys are into like impregnation or lolicon. Why do people think it's that weird? Am I the maniac?

>>51708978
I had a cleric who a princess went all yandere for after we "saved" her from a dragon. She was just hanging out with the dragon and wasn't really in danger, but an impression was made nevertheless.
She actually saved our asses one time when she got wind that a neighboring kingdom was going to execute us as scapegoats for a crime committed by the BBEG (who was a high ranking member of that kingdom's theocracy). We were allowed to write one letter out when we were captured (for hope of a ransom, you see). The paladin got ransomed by his and my church, but he was it. For a while we were worried we might face a party wipe (see, the original idea was that roughly half of us would get out and free the other half, but that fell through do some abysmal rolls by our wizard and bard, and because our barbarian didn't know how to write, so he couldn't even send a letter if he wanted to. In a latch ditch effort I sent a letter to the princess, thinking she would ransom me. However, I rolled high on the performance check for the letter, and she decided that the fuckers who through me in prison in the first place needed to pay. So, she raised an army and marched on the castle in which I was being kept. A short pants-shitting by the minor noble who owned the castle later, we were free, with the church's ransom money returned. I thought that was the end of it, but the princess decided that she hadn't been terrible enough, and razed the castle to the ground, later giving me a pile of the defender's skulls as a gift. It left quite the impression. My poor cleric ended up marrying her more out of fear than anything else, I think.

>>51708978
I got married to a kobold princess just from walking into a kobold settlement due to weird customs involving her choosing me because I looked like a good husband and not a kobold.
Then later I became king of an ancient civilization and am now technically married to the centuries old succubus queen who is apparently completely indebted to serving the king for life.

Neither of these marriages were consensual and I'm forced to drag them both around because they refuse to leave so I just have two wives I don't want. I just wanted to hit stuff with my sword and be edgy.

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>>51796742
quite pickle you got yourself there huh

>>51796308
>implying that wasn't her plan

>>51796742
Your dm's a good man. If I had it my way, you'd have either a troll or a goblin. The former would demand snusnu every night.

>>51796828
The resulting sex was angry and she was NOT happy about it.

Roughly from behind, while she spent the entire time yelling that her God would smite him for this indignation and disrespect.

>>51796906
I had a PC sucked off by a naga once, that was a little creepy.

>>51796878
Who said that's a bad thing honestly? If anything I'd be doing the snu snu. I'm 10 feet tall with 31 strength as we're really high level in the campaign now.

>>51796999
It did once come up in my last campaign just how big my half orcs dick was for one scene. The things DMs have to put up with

>>51797053
>Replying to 5 day old posts with that garbage

>>51797053
Oh man, it has been a while since I have seen autism this pure! Good job anon, keep /tg/ edgy.

>>51797053
Not that guy, but
>That feel when you discover 4chan and tvtropes roughly the same time bout a decade ago
>That feel when you have been a /new/fag (then a /pol/lack), and a fa/tg/guy the whole time.
>That feel when you loved tvtropes, never got involved in the drama/forums but just went from trope to trope every few months
It was such a good idea...

>>51797579
BBEG isn't even a TVTropes thing, though.

My character in my current campaign is married. He's been married for like 40 years. Married his former adventuring companion, and they're both retired.

He's back to adventuring again because their adventuring daughter went missing and his wife isn't able to walk any more.

>>51708978

>be reincarnated as female human
>in spite of this, be the most well adjusted in party of
>severely retarded half orc, loli cleric and halfling whos never shown his face
>get a follower as a consequence of the leadership feat
>just appears one day cooking for us
>orc sells my hand in marriage for 150 gold to him
>marriage will be held qhen the world is not in immediate danger
>campaign ends up getting put on ice

I'd gone through with it if it as part of character development if the campaign had continued though

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>>51796512
Anon, I hate to tell you this, but inflation, vore, furries, and awful snuff shit are (unfortunately) often involved in size. All of this shit is easy to make fun of regardless of the content because people who partake in it are either sane and don't bring it up, or spergs who post badges of it on facebook and "God I wish that were me" on all of the comment sections.
Also, please tell me where you got content that was free of aforementioned elements that led you to not thinking they're associated.