/tdf/ - Stage 19

fuck froome
fuck sky
fuck all brits

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>this finish

>>77233189
Who is the absolute madman that came up with this and somehow got it approved?

Bouhanni to win the green jersey by elimination

Screencap this.

>>77233223
Ozzie dont crack breh

7th for carnage

URAN ATTACK

Huge crash in the finish breaking Froome's leg

QUE DE MONDE SUR LE THREAD DU TOUR

>>77233333
Joli quintuplé

they may as well try and make the first 100km complete chaos, and try and somehow sneak into a big group.

chances are extraordinarily slim.

im gonna miss these threads so much

So, how long until team Sky is exposed as US Postal jr. ?

Stage 19
Still waiting for Uran to attack

>>77233372
My last digit is the number of years.

>>77233359
Join us at >>>/n/ for your daily cycling threads

>>77233173
its all downhill today

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It's love.

>>77233420
i was amazed 100 people didn't immediately dive for them

>>77233456
What do you think you would get for returning it to them after the race?

>>77233509
A free tour of the Sky bus and an energy gel

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Shitty weather general?

>>77233517
The busses are quarantined, they won't let you in there

>>77233519
The entire summer has been nothing but shitty weather here. Fucking cold and rainy and it doesn't seem to be getting any better.

>>77233352
I TRIED SO HARD

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>>77233534
but muh climate change

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>>77233551
>mfw they change from global warming to climate change

>>77233534
>tfw you'll never live in Rovaniemi

>>77233189
That'll be a very short finish sprint. :v

Overall temperatures can increase despite cooler summer months you dumb Reddit shits

>putting boring ass long snorefest stage at the literal end of the tour instead of another day in the alps

what is ASO thinking

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>>77233551
Climate change is bogus.
Average temperature is the same.
Who cares that temperatures in summer have gone from 25ºC to 35ºC have gone to 20ºC to 40ºC, the average is the same :^)

Honestly, the weather has never been so fucked up.

>>77233573
Yeap. I agree tho.

>>77233573
c-climate change? i thought 4 seasons were c-climate change

>>77233590
take your facts back to /sci/. We're not interested.

https://www.theguardian.com/sport/2017/jul/21/allez-allez-le-tour-de-france-a-photo-essay

Why did /tdf/ think anyone could beat Froome?

>>77233534
Isn't that how it should be?

>>77233636

Come on man, science is an integer part of cycling.

>>77233912
*Integral

>>77233926
*Differentiation

>>77233947
*Number Theory

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Where the fuck is the problem? These ladies are tastefully cladded. Why ban the ladies?

>>77233979
They might as well give every rider a medal too.

>>77233979
You realize most woman are not like that right?
It's 2017, we shouldn't allow the rest of the 90% of females to feel bad about not exercising and not turning men on.
They have feelings.

>>77233979
yates is smol

>>77233979
So the muslims can watch too

>>77233979
They're not actually banning ladies, mate.
And you know they're often dressed much less tastefully than that.

>>77234030
> And you know they're often dressed much less tastefully than that.
Proofs?

>no wind
what did the most boringest tour mean by this?

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L'Équipe pls...

>>77234159
Artificial sidewinds when?

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>>77234159
>most boringest

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>>77234191
cheeky :^)

Daily reminder that the intermediate sprint goes through Bane-on.

So we have to agree that Le Tour is the most boring out of all 3?

>>77234191
WEW
E
W

>>77234243
The comfiest though.

This stage could have been so much harder. They will be near Ventoux and Lure mountains (>1800m).

>>77233590
>getting brainwashed by the climate change shills and calling us redditors

Hehe xd

>>77234243
But it is the only one that counts.

>>77234243
yes. the tour is very overrated.

>>77234261
Ventoux when motherfuckers, it's just not the same without it

>>77234286
In terms of prestige tdf > giro > vuelta
In terms of excitement giro > vuelta >>> tdf

>>77234286
Giro>TdF>Vuelta

who cares who wins the yellow. its been more fun watching the other jerseys. how come nobody is accusing sunweb of doping? they have won multiple stages and won two jerseys in the tdf and won the giro this year.

>>77234326
5th stage win today la

>>77234326
Shut your mouth

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LAURA ALERT:
Jack Bauer said that this tour has been a big fat waste of time.

I got so far, and tried so hard

>>77234351
im being serious, you kanker. everyone accuses sky of doping and they win fuck all except the tdf. subweb are killing it this year and will probably win the vuelta too.

>systematic doping in a Dutch team
AS IF!

>>77234370
Bias against Sky.

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LAURA ALERT!
Koen de Kort says Trek will both try for the breakaway and Degencuck in the sprint

>>77234385
yeah its literally the rabobank team anyway. i would say most teams are doping though. orica are run by an ex doper.

>>77234362
The amount of faggots who care about celebrity deaths always amazes me. People dont even know the guy and act so so sad because of their deaths only to carry on the rest of their day as if nothing happened because they have 0 emotional attachment. Bunch of attentoon whores.

>>77234370
It's because we have watched sky cheat/dope for several years. Sunweb didn't do anything out of the ordinary.

>>77234413
my ex spent the day crying because of this shit...

We all predicted the giant heavy TT rider Tom Dumoulin to become a Grand Tour winner and stud in the high mountains.

All perfectly normal.

>>77234441
Is she 15 or what?

>>77234413
yeah thank god /cyc/ didn't react like that to Scarponi

fuck off

>>77234370
Because Sunweb seems to be an actual team like we want to see them, not a caravan of the most expensive camels in cycling.

>>77234413
More than anything, it's dark pottery for me.

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If a man want to die you shouldn't be sad.
A man has a right to kill himself. It's only sad f he gets killed or dies in an accident.

Quintana attack?

>>77234448
the mind of a 15 year old

>>77234423
Have Team the Sky won the most races since they formed?

it's not for team classification, millar you tool

>>77234529
They only dope in the races that matter for the british press. brits don't give a shit about classics. just like burgers. that's why they always dope in track olympics.

>>77234445
We saw him almost succeed at the Vuelta while being heavy as shit. Now after dropping weight he still lost in the mountains but won enough in the TTs to win the Giro. Much less suspect than Froomey who dominates TTs but can't be dropped on high mountains by literal manlets who can only climb.

>>77234460
I bet you changed your Facebook picture to a french flag too after the bataclan attack you lil homo

>>77234563
They've won 2 monuments in the last two years.

Keep tuning in every July.

>>77234550
>scots

worse than blacks

reminder that orica have been more successful in terms of number of wins and monuments than sky

>>77234583
both by luck and wheel hugging

>>77234613
They must be doping.

>>77234619
seek help

>>77234622
they probably are considering who runs the team

orica is well know for micro dosing

>>77234676
Green """""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""edge""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""

>>77234243
the Vuelta is even worse.only meme climb at the end and nothing for the first 200km. And all you get is burned grass

Giro is the best but a lot of the time it has the weakest line up

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Good afternoon lads, how was your morning ride?

Mine was top comfy, as always.

>FDJ has 3 riders left

At least you tried

i tried relatively hard, and got moderately far

>>77234723
>At least you tried
Source?

hello

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>>77234718
Bretty gud

Are you the dutch tourist?

>>77234768
rude

>>77234768
>>77234793
You shall always greet a Dutch by insulting him.

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>>77234768
ello

>>77234807
This.
It gets really awkward otherwise.

theus

Jens kokkenlære

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>>77234718
good, but I am a fat fuck.

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The dutch like to be treated like shit. That's why so many of their girls have turkish pimps.

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>>77234768
bonjour petite putain

>>77234856
私はあなたの不屈を称賛する

>>77234856
Keep going for those PRs weeb

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>>77234771
yes

HI GUYS

>german eurosport talking about what a shithole Marseille is
kek

>>77234972
that's ok, we'll get the scenic route tomorrow

>>77234972
Are German cities much better though?

>>77234980
the ones in NRW (like Düsseldorf) aren't

>>77234966
Howdy pardner

What's the 'point' of this stage

>>77234718
Didn't have a morning ride. Did go for a post stage ride yesterday and snatched yet another KOM.

>>77234890
>私はあなたの不屈を称賛する
ありがとうございました先輩

>>77234996
a good battle between a strong break

>>77234901
eyyyyyy, fuck. I am a weeb lol. Was about to put a Love Live sticker on my ride, then thought better of it.

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>>77235010
風があなたの目標に向かってあなたのお尻を押すかもしれません

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>>77234718
Wish someone would give me a morning ride.

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>>77234718

>sky ridiculous
>SK ridiculous
what did s and k mean by this?

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>>77234972
They are right, it is the 2nd most dangerous city in France.

Marseille is the capital of Algeria

>>77235081
>"the wonderful multiculturalism you got here"
what did eurosport mean by this

>>77235094
No it's actually Algiers

>>77234718
It was windy as fuck, the way back was a nightmare

>>77235105
It's like Washington being the capital of the US, it's bullshit

>>77234890
Listen, I don't speak Danish you retard.

>>77235105
>>77235094
The idea of getting geographically corrected by an American for a joke is devastating.

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>>77235119

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>>77235119
yeah lelz

>>77235119
Idk what my being USian has to do with it

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Will the mad moleman try to win this stage? He will have to attack on that final 3rd cat.

>>77235141
You might be new here. /sp/, and particularly /tdf/ threads, hate americans.

>>77235141
Typically Americans are bretty fuggin bad at geography.

The alpecin commercial has more action than this tour.

>The Earth has been covered by ice multiple times throughout history
>We're destroying le climate, buy particle filters!

i still have a hard time understanding this agenda. is it all a ruse to take power from the middle east or is there some truth to it?

by all means we're far too late anyway, feels like a joke having a particle filter on your car here when you've traveled in asia where there are 500 times more people - and they all ride the ultimate polluters.
boats that emit black smoke, cars that smell like your brain shrinks every time you inhale, cities literally covered in smog.

but god forbid i use my deodorant outdoors

>>77235151
Nah, I'm not. This is my 4th /tdf/ here.

>>77235170
Probably no more than a random sampling from any other country. I personally love geography and world history though. I still spend tons of time studying maps.

>>77235170
Bullshit.

You name a country.

Any country.

I don't care how fucking obscure it is.

And I guarantee we can find it and bomb it.

>>77235175
That ad is fucking lit, brb gonna order a bottle of Alpecin.

>>77235182
pls no.

>don't serve me any other rosé, I won't drink it, I *will* be that rude

>>77235182
Georgia.

>>77235181
>I personally love geography and world history though.
I don't doubt it. That's why I said typically, all my murican friends are passport holding muricans and they aren't anything like the stereotypes.

>>77235182

Israel pls

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Fucking hell, tommy D is not doing the vulelta after all. Yesterday everyone was yelling about him riding it.

>>77235204
It's a done deal.

SEE YOU IN HELL ATLANTA!

hey burger. i made a (lame) joke and you corrected me with the right answer. That is why we goodfed on you. But i will still say i'm proud that you know the real capital of Algeria.
Keep it up.

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>>77235170

>pull pie out of the oven
>see cat
>sing to her (to the tune of NINs Hurt)
>#Pie#
>#Baked for myself today#
>#So I could have a meal#
>the cat looked at me like I was a cunt

Was my cat right to look at me like I was a cunt?

>>77235244
He is going to be the world champion. Vuelta is a meme anyway.

>>77235276
>rainy descents and cobbestones in fucking Bergen
He's gonna die

>>77235271
well cat kind of has a point in general.

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>>77234357

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>>77235295
>>77235304

>>77235244

He will win the tour next year. I guarantee it.

>>77235320
Is that the button for Tom's World Championship hopes?

>>77235325
well okay then

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What's the best Ed Sheeran song? For me, it's Sing

--WC result--
Road: Magnus Cort
TT: Tom D

>>77235356
Why is this mong so popular?

>>77235343
lol!

Is Alpecin shampoo andy good?

>>77235366

He makes good music tbqh

Wait what, what happened to the commentators?

>>77235398
No he doesn't

>>77235360
Their first draft for the Road Race was one of the toughest routes in the last decade. Then they realized Kristoff and EBH would die and made it easier.

I have fucking autism

>>77235439
spee doesn't count as socialization therapy, sorry

>>77235439
I have anxiety, depression and borderline personality disorder.

>>77235244
Barguil + Alaphilippe + Bardet

France is about to conquer Spain lads

>>77235390
>tfw when you would buy a shampoo that made your dick bigger than your balding head less bald

>>77235410

The whole world says he does though

>>77235366

Lowest common denominator normiecore.

>giant arse

What did they mean by this?

<3

oh those cute pilots

>>77235464
Source?

>>77235439
Don't we all?

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:3

<3333

>>77235489
THICCC

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>>77235427
This route is decent. If you make it to hard you just end up with a boring race were everybody waits.

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Nice.

>>77235468
Why do I feel as though the lowest common denominator is becoming more and more majoritive?

>>77235489
Thomas Bay said "i hope that's supposed to be a heart"

What do you listen to while cycling?
(or at least what songs do you have in your head while cycling?)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z0rVbB3Z_-o

>>77235525
cheeky

>>77235489
That's a very weird cloud. Glad they had the Tour cameras to capture such a stranger weather phenomenon.

>>77235463
what? that feel when when?

>>77235528
I remember in the 2013 Giro i was on an insane betting spree. I think i had money on the winner 13 days in a row. And in the finish area the Italians was often playing money for nothing so it became my winner song.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xcFFqGjz0_c

>>77235528
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=s6GZhEGIpPk

>>77235578
>ruin

nice retro architects there my friend

gotta admit i preffer their newer stuff

>>77235528
I dont even listen to anything while cycling

>>77235510
It's not Nice. It's Sisteron.

:^)

>>77235603
why would you prefer their neo-core stuff...

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if digits Aru surprises everyone and wins TT by a minute margin
Skeletor kills himself in shame

>>77235528
I listen to traffic because im not a cunt

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>>77235638
he needs 2 mins but no digits anyway fug

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>tfw nothing is happening

I bet its not even windy either

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dubs and the cannondale doctor discorvers that uran has a stomach infection and he somehow manages to cure it over night and then all the sudden Uran becomes a world class TTer and beats Froome and takes yellow.

>>77235665

thread moving so slowly it's coming in at 150 posts below the lowest estimated total for the day

>>77235645
The Low Spark of High-Heeled Boys?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YY-_Y_7p55M

thread moving so slow we can use it for eneco tour

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see you next year

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>mfw no evil call center scammer g/f.

>>77235510
>dat geology doe
i literally jizzed

>>77235719
The final stages are basically just a parade.

>>77235724
that's how danish women look.

>>77235742
Uran has got it in the bag.

worst tdf ever

>>77235742
b-but this one was supposed to be fireworks!

>>77235617
australia please....

their newer stuff ois musicly and production quality wise so much better.
i still enjoy listening to Ruin from time to time, but with as much as the band has improved it didN#t help the ageing process

>>77235753
nahm8 its actually been a good tdf, yes its froomewinslol again but its been good otherwise.

>>77235766
>good
>nothing happened

>>77235753

I would have liked to have been old enough to watch the tours in the 80s/early 90s. No helmets long hair, doping, it was probably more interesting.

It wouldn't be so bad if all the sprinters hadn't of ripped. Sagan/Matthews/Kittel would have been a fun green jersey contest.

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>>77235775
banning dopes was a mistake

>>77235775
Sure was fun watching Indurain wheelsuck and TT to victory five years in a row

What does everyone think of the hybrid sprinters who keep winning the tour?
Aus commentator(with 3 green jerseys) was just going on about how bullshit that non pure sprinters keep winning green by breakaways into intermediate sprints, and thinks intermediate sprint points should be halved so pure sprinters have a better chance'
Do you agree?

>>77235774
weve had some good battles for stagewins, and weve had a good battle for green until kitlel decided to give up.

>>77235775
it sure was great watching Indurain grind his way up mountains then destroy everyone in the 100+km of time trials.

Quintana has attacked more today than Indurain did in his entire Tour de France career.

So I've been thinking about flat stages:

Why not make them stupidly long like earlier in TdF history? I'm talking 300-400km.
They would have to start early in the morning, which would make eating during the ride a big deal.
You could have a big intermediate sprint in the middle of the race to spice things up.
The distance would create big challenges for some riders and you could half the days with flat stages.

Wdyt?

>>77235799

No, if you're a pure sprinter you get rewarded with stage wins, if you're a good rider you get to challenge for the Green Jersey by getting high placements at the end of the stage but also using tactics to hit the intermediate points.

It's not called the Stage Winners Jersey.

>>77235785
Matthews would probably not have really tried had Sagan still been in the Tour. He has been getting his points where Sagan usually takes them in other years.

I think take Uran out of this race and it would have seemed much more exciting.

The Great Froome vs the Young Frenchman, both riding away from their competition on the final stages. Aru cracking.

It's just the presence of Uran that is skewing things.

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>tfw apparently strong headwind in the final 30km

Thats just going to discourage attacking. Confirmed for nothing happening.

if you're a sprinter and you """""crash""""" before the mountains so you can watch them from a comy aircon'd bus, you should lose all your stage wins.

tour de france should be about finishing, not finishing after the first two weeks of farming sprint stages is over

>>77235821
>muh special storys
>fuck off BBC wanker

>>77235810
it would just be a slower version of the stages we have roght now.
and it would massivly benefit the big teams over the small ones making it even more boring

>>77235836
i agree, you haven't done tour de france unless you can get over the mountains.

>>77235799
They have already tweeked the rules to the "pure" sprinters advantage. It shouldn't be the flat day jersey.

>>77235810
the riders just wouldn't race them. we'd just have an extra 6 hours of nothing happening.

>>77235850
Then make the intermediate sprint after 200km equivalent to the finish in terms of points, price money etc and would have 2 races on one day

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>>77235799
McEwen is still salty he lost 2 Green jerseys to THOR

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>>77235865

>Marseilles is not my favorite place in the planet
>I always feel better leaving it

>trashing marseille

frogs btfo

Make the GTs 15 stages and max 4 flat stages

>>77235872
my brother has turned into this kid (he's 18)

>>77235891
I think the issue is that most flat stages are actual fully flat stages. They should always put one or two hills in there that could challenge some sprinters. Thatll spice things up.

Okay guys. Gotta go to work.

Best of luck to Bardet and Uran.

Pls no crashes.

Marseille is great

t. Abdellaoui

I was in Marseille once and I had a walk around. It really didn't seem that bad, so I sat down in a cafe for a drink.

At that point a man on a moped parked up, pulled out an automatic pistol and fired into the cafe. The waiter ran out and returned fire as the guy drove off.

It really is horrific.

>>77235883
>>77235888
Now you know how it feels when Euro's are talking about America.

wtf I love Kirby now

>>77235799
>9 completely flat stages
>50 points for the winner, the second gets only 30

What more does he want?

I'm kinda worried about another Allahu Akbar tomorrow. There is no way to make sure there is not another truck or car of peace and the amount of people that deranged must be in the thousands in Marseille.

might go for a run wearing my cycling cap tomorrow.

the ladies at the office complimented it again today at work. they said it goes well with my suit

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>>77235906
The Giro is really good with that. They often put a little twist on it.

>>77235925
they hat anti truck barriers all over the city center in düsseldorf in the areas where the people where
i'd expect the same in paris

>>77235927
go for it

>>77235925
Excuse me bigot. Being violently murdered is part and parcel of living in European cities. Please respect the cultural differences of others.

>that shit band
ugh

>nirvana
>not linking park

wtf i hate french bands now

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>that shit tier nirvana cover

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>discount nirvana

>french rock band

like british wine desu

>that top qt bass player

>>77235921
and on fx the stages Matthews won he only got 30 points because fuck sagan..

>>77235799
He seems to be yet another idiot who has mistaken the points classification as a stage win/pure sprinters classification.

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>>77235927
girls are cruel..

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>>77235799
>trying to effectively remove EVEN MORE small wins for the rest of the nobody in the peloton
Aussies are retarded, what else is new?

>>77235836
>not winning all the early sprint stages and then shitposting to social media as others struggle over the mountains
Cipollini was the hero we needed

>>77235906
I'm all for more medium mountain stages.
Giro does this quite well.

>>77235955
I like when it's the same for every stage and guys like Valverde can win it.
Maybe they can make a Flat stage jersey for the best riders who can't make it over a 3 cat climb.

>>77235963
I colour coordinated with my tie and pocket square

Landa has signed with

ORICA

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>>77235983
He was shitposting pre social media

>>77236001
check that. Laura Meseguer got it wrong. Mikel Nieve to

ORICA!

based lavendel. I bet thierry baudet is watching this stage.

Cannondale drapac will change next year to:
Oaf Cycling Team

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>>77236007
take that back! Laura is never wrong

Will Call Me Jane provide us with good memes in years to come?

>>77236041
what's she actually doing there?

>>77235799
>feeling bad for guys that can't even ride up the mountains

its the opposite to me, I'd much rather see super puncheurs like mattews and sagan get the green

it was a fucking joke when cavendish was world champion

world champion because you can huddle in a pack all day on a flat course and then out sprint everyone?

sprinters are great fun to watch in the end but they are not the caliber of riders that wind up in green these days

>>77236053
installing free smileys

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>ywn hang between Lauras boobies
>>77236053
It looks like somebody walked in on her wathcing porn and she didn't have a back up program to put up instead.

who the hell is this laura thats been shitposted in everyone of these threads

>>77236093
Pfff, loser

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>>77236093
My gf :3
She works for Eurosport

>>77235994
Where are you on the spectre?

>>77236081
>>77236118
she doesnt even look that good, wtf

>>77236131
gay

theres been this commercial thats been blasting
WORK HARD PLAY HARD WORK HARD PLAY HARD

with people being all intense in it

I thought it was a sportswear commercial or something
I just realized its part of a gingerale ad after 3 weeks of it blasting in my face

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Going to get an ice cream lads do you want anything?

>>77236145
>Jacques

Not good m8.

>>77236131
she's on our television screens. what more do you want?

>>77236145
Champion pls lad thanks

does anyone else ride like Froome?
I do it constantly
I can go about 45 miles per hour for a couple miles when I breath like that

>>77236145
Top tier
Strawberry cornet
Magnum white or almond

Medium tier:
Smarties pop out
Smiley face with gum in the middle

Better than nothing tier:
Twister
Astro

>gay bear

>>77236145
A big nut to go with the two I've already got ;)

>>77236145
>the tour is so boring i'm making icecream jokes
You would probably like a big nut.

>>77236145
The one thats labeled Cornet is the kind I always get from gas stations

those are the best

>>77236041
>no gnu/linux
Dropped

i hate you guys

>Cannondale is now sponsoried by HuffPost (Oath)

http://www.cyclingnews.com/news/oath-help-secure-slipstream-future-with-major-sponsorship-deal/

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How much better would the tour have been overall if we still had Valverde, Porte, Sagan and Cavendish? (Not adding Thomas coz it would've made it more boring)

>>77236200
go back to your hospital bed mark xd

>>77236203
Fake news team

>>77236203
Disgusting. About to throw my Cannondale Synapse in the trashcan

>>77236217
inb4 they gonna create fake news about other teams

>>77236144

I hate this trend of commercials having the loudest and most obnoxious music possible. That one especially, I have to mute or switch channels every time it's on.

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what should i get?

>>77236205
Well the final sprint would have been more entertaining with someone to actually beat Kittel.
Valverde and Porte would no different, maybe a little bit more pressure to Froome, but otherwise it would still be froomewinslol

THAT'S BORA

>>77236145
top tier
1. cornets
2. champion
3. sklo crocante
4. coupe
5. creamamore
6. pinocio
7. super choc
8. twin
9. jacky
10. Astro

shit tier
1. Mr Snow
2. Good up
3. magic cup
4. tornado
5. faggot drops
6. 123
7. sealife surprise cup
8. soft ice

>>77236229
magnum mandel m9, by far the best ice cream on the planet.

>>77236229
Skatterkiste is where it's at!!!

>>77236203
I'm gonna call them Oaf cycling

>>77236205
>that flag of Limburg sucking him in
We are really God's chosen people.

>>77236229
That daim thing looks delicious

>>77236203
RIP
Gonna go throw my cannondale in the fucking trash now

>>77236229
>Amerikaner Slut
>white with black inside of it

what did they mean by this?

>>77236145
I'm almost out of codeine

why would they make the last real stage so fucking boring?

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>>77236229
>winner taco