/heem/: tyron woodley edition

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Schaub is God

>Le refresh le catalog cheeto finger man

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>>74000783
Early bird gets the worm, my guy. For sure don't project your cheeto dust onto my pristine porcelain fingers.

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>>74000777

nice digits, my man

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Is this possible without steroids?

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Huck Finn of our time

>>74000806
Josh Barnett is the natty limit, my friend.

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*hunches over computer and refreshes catalog till new thread gets posted, wipes cheeto fingers, clicks into his big turd folder, finds "cptschaub", doesn't fill in captcha cause already forked out neetbux for 4chanpass, and rushes to be first*

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Steroids or natty?

>>74000820
The things I would do to her are not natural

>>74000820

>Having abs = juicing

Put the fork down

>>74000820
Her stomach is creepy, she looks like she had a c-section to remove Alien from her chest

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>>74000852

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>>74000863

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>>74000815
>neetbux
I have a job brother.
>cheeto fingers
don't even like cheetos
>h8ing on my 4chan pass
you're just jelly

>>74000872
>this is a 10 in poland
Kurwa!

>>74000820
I'm going to force-feed her small amounts of T every couple of hours, believe you me buddeh.

>>74000820
>You will never eat guacamole out of that gap

>>74000900
>ywn eat salsa out of her bh

>>74000820
>feverishly looks to see if exhentai has an ab-fuck tag

>>74000887
Who's saying anything about 10 ?

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*portions the elites at the docks*

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Francis Ngannou

Where is the new Predictionbro?

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*blocks your path*

>>74000916
This is honestly a devastating feel.

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>>74000946

*grows upto be shut-in neckbeard who posts on /pol/ everyday*

Unironically what is Paige's book going to be about? Ronda's book was pointless wtf is paige going to talk about?

Will the title be something like Turning The Paige?

>>74000975
*becomes submissive*
Let me feel you master

>>74000983
It will be about her being bullied in grade school then joining team Alpha Male and getting railed by Cody Garbrandt.

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*blocks your path*

>>74000983
>Paige's book
>Paige
>book

Oh god

>>74000983
Ronda's book actually wasn't that bad if you're into biographies. She had a good ghost writer. Not as good as Hunto's, though.

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*works graveyard shift at the docks for minimum wage*

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47-46

>>74000981
Honestly, civilization would crumble if black people were solely left in charge.

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*portions dip into your path*

>>74001016
>She had a good ghost writer.

her ugly sister

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QFEcCiRFDYM

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>Beige people revved up again

Welp! Doesn't take much does it laddies?

>>74001045
You're way outta line, dude.

>>74001045
DC is a good dad.

>>74001043
>cindy dandois being a coal burner might upset white people

what

>>74001045
Who hurt you?

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>>74001036

Lol

>>74001031
Sends Ngannou to heem you

>>74001037
oh my god, she talks so much like Ronda.

>>74001053

>coal burner

Why so upset beige friend?

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If Cody beats TJ will you stop doubting him?

>>74001065
Buddy, you can keep her.

>>74001069
If Cody beats Dom twice, I'll accept him as my champ

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*portions kookie*

>>74001072

Lol ya seething. It really doesn't take much.

>>74001078
should have fought carla for that title

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*blocks your path*

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*portions racists*

>>74001091
carla ugly fuckin alien

>>74001081
She's not attractive. It's really just that simple.

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I read Ronda's book. Did anyone else? (I downloaded it FOR FREE).

>>74001037
She's not ugly.

>>74001111
You think she'll write about her brother?

>>74001100

You are seething with rage.

>>74001123
#BLDM

>>74001123
>white men who don't have any interest in a substandard woman are secretly angry

okay

>>74001069
After that performance against Dom, how could anyone doubt him?

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Cannonier is my low-key boy 2bh

>>74001140

>Keeps responding to justify how not mad he is.

Dude please calm down

Seriously who is Joanna fighting for the belt? She's in training camp in the US.

https://www.instagram.com/p/BQBWl5alxIe/

>>74001120
it will be really stupid if she sticks with the "i was bullied because i was small and pretty" angle

>>74001078
This is such a good photo, except for one thing: her tiny little gremlin hand.

9/10 So close

>>74001156

What an ugly language

>betting on Holm
how are people this stupid?

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>>74001155
oh my jeez

>>74001156
It's Waterson. She denied it was Waterson and she denied it was Kookie last time.

>>74001171

>Starts race-baiting
>Gets race-baited back
>wahhh you guys ruined it ;_;

Sad!

>>74001175

Post slip Flavio

>>74001174
I'm learning it now (for free), it's the worst

>>74001181
oh so she rused me

>>74001056
>Wonderboy saving the bottles
I kek everytime

also
>you now remember when people were claiming Conor was shook because he took his glasses off

why does woodley trigger /heem/ so much?

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>>74001156

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>>74001192

Beige people are weird man, who even knows?

What's Michelle Waterson going to be against Joanna? +800?

>>74001078
Karolina reminds of my ex so bad. It's a bit triggering.

>>74001188
shit odds, no point

Why has there been virtually no hype about this upcoming fight night?

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>>74001078
why are non-anglos so autistic seeming

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>>74001196
What you say white boi?

>>74001207
Is that Washington DC or ATT Florida?

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>>74001218

>>74001212

It's a pick em fight. If you're so confident De Pepemie is gonna win, you should smash the line.

>>74001207
poor woman has to spend the weekend at a wizard's game instead of in houston

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>>74001218
this kills the whyteboi

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>>74001190
It's the best, keeps niggers and goatfuckers away

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>>74001234

>>74001234
>smashing the line on a low level striking match in wMMA

dude no

>>74000975
OwO whats that?

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Why is there a race war on /heem/?

>>74001249
LOL thank you whoever made this

>>74001252

>dude Holly is gonna lose xD

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>>74001258

Dockie's check bounced again and he hasn't eaten in weeks.

>>74001265
She probably is, but I'm not going large on a favourite that isn't Nunes, Shevchenko, Grasso, or Joanna.

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did someone start taking the picks?

why are people doubting based holly?

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>>74001288
i believe

>>74001288
Because she just lost a kickboxing match to a flyweight.

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>>74001259
You're welcome.

Heem always needs more OC

>>74001288

Prep for a rant from the Australian with a hard-on for Ronda lol.

>>74001245

I didn't know she was such a good dancer.

>>74001288
been losing ever since jon came back

Greg is *portioning* more time for the GOAT over >wmma

>>74001301
valentina is really good though lol

>>74001288
Holly Holm
>Boxer who only ever fought in her state
Germaine de Randamie
>Undefeated dutch MT fighter who fought way tougher competition than Holm ever did

>They will be facing in a muay thai fight with 4oz gloves

gee I wonder

>>74001302
>Canadan

>>74001288
Women's boxing is a meme.

>>74001317
Holly will win

Trust me

I predict these things

>>74001023
>>74001036

Lol sperg caught replying to himself.

>>74001317
i think you might eat your words

>>74001317

Gee I wonder why you won't post slip lol.

Holly Holm via 2nd round TKO

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>>74001330
You're Jewish...

>>74001330

Are you gonna reply to yourself again?

>>74001330
>having time for all that just to shitpost r/MMA2
lmao

>>74001341
Close. Wrong fighter, though.

>>74001325
>>74001332
nah I'm on a roll lately

>>74001341
I'd even bet but the only way to bet on MMA here in Italy is via seedy online sites that I don't trust particularly

>>74001352

>Flag

Lol dude I'm in stitches

if you filter 'sperg' and 'niggers' you will cut through a lot of the shitposts

missed the end of the last thread boys did dockie keep freaking out because of his dad and all that?

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>>74001330
now THIS is schaubposting

*smacks lips*

HOL UP

germaine would lose to valentina at 135

valentina is the best female striker in the world

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>>74001357
Cool story, lad. You'd better bet on Holly before she slips into favourite territory, though.

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>>74001330

>Be 5'4" manlet dwarf who works on the docks for minimum wage
>Never have anything intelligent to say
>Always race-baiting for (you)'s
>Gets banned
>Spergs out cause he got banned even though he can ban evade
>Needs to remind people how super smart he is for ban evading
>Such a mental manlet he makes fun of another man's daughter cause his dad was never around to raise him right
>Rinse and repeat till your graveyard shift ends
>Is literally making fun of himself with the wheelbarrow analogy

Sad little man.

lol angela hill is getting no respect

jessica andrade is -550

>>74001317
Holm's beaten way better competition in MMA, though.

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>>74001383

Thanks I will

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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B4lVvv60QiA

GRASSO
R
A
S
S
O

>>74001405
Yeah, these odds are absurd. Andrade is winning, but come on now.

>>74001414
As a certain sperg once told me, records don't matter.

>Listened to the MMA Vivisection
>They said maybe there's value in Tecia finishing in under 2 1/2 rounds
>Connor says but remember she's not a consistent finisher
>She has never finished a fight

>>74001405
She's still to green was hacing alot of grappling problems her last fight

>>74001435

>Picked Arlovski by decision
>Calls me a sperg

Wewy

>>74001414
Don't matter m8, it's a Muay Thai fight.
How well she did against people who weren't Muay Thai fighters is completely irrelevant.
Unless Holm has suddenly become a wrestler this will be a Muay Thai fight.
And one of the two is an obviously better Muay Thai fighter.
This is the same reason why she lost to Shevchenko, who is also way smaller than her.

>>74001445

>Be 5'4 144 lbs dockdwarf

No need to go on any further. That's it, that's the joke lol

>>74001444
Spergness is based on your personality and behaviour and you qualify in spades, lad.

>>74001438
Her first two amateur bouts were finishes, but yes.

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>ultra heavy

>>74001460

>Constantly picking the wrong decisions
>I point out how his analysis his wrong
>Doesn't want to listen cause he's Mr. Know-It-All
>Always losing bigly
>Calls me the sperg

Lad....

>>74001258
There's always a race war on /heem/

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I'm with Andrade

>>74001473
>>I point out how his analysis his wrong

Ah, yes, tell me more about how the fighter that had top control for half a round and couldn't finish Shevchenko can finish Ronda Rousey on the ground.

>red hot chili peppers

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fUTcFuy72oE

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Miesha a cute

CUTE

>>74001317

>Holly Holm
Lost through a fluke submission in a fight she was winning on points
Lost to the best striker in the division
Jackson-Wink

>De Randamie
Got pieced and elbowed by Amanda Nunes
2 fights in the UFC
Best win is a girl who retired and was undersized
Got outstruck by Julia Budd

Hmmmm

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>>74001487

>s-she can't stop the clinch

Lol!

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>>74001502
This.

>Be 5'4 144 lbs dockdwarf

Wew

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I thought Eugene Robinson was bad, but this guy man. Unlistenable.

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>>74001498

>she will never do this to your balls

>>74001524
Is that Hack Slack?

>>74001535
why live?

is that good technique?

>>74001515
>>74001502
Is she Jewish?

>>74001524
lol kid nate has kids working for him for free

>>74001510
>Got outstruck by Julia Budd
what the hell are you talking about, she wrestlefucked her
and when they faced in muay thai De Randamie knocked her the fuck out

>The dwarf is replying to itself again

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>>74001502
Cropped the white line on the side out

>>74001549
she's a christian
don't know if anyone in her family is

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>>74001549
She because baptized as an honorary Jew in one of her early fights

>>74001452
I dunno man, de Randamie loks a lot more aggressive. Unless my memory is failing, Shev made her lead and countered whereas de Randamie is going to open up a lot more.

I'm gonna watch some more tape on her tonight, maybe I'll change my mind later.

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> I’m really far from UFC title shot against Joanna Jedrzejczyk

>>74001582
>>74001502
>Breast mode

Indeed.

>>74001597
>It's not a racial decision not to rent to them, it's a business decision
thats fair i guess, its your building after all
and you can rent it to whomever you want

>>74001603
I honestly haven't even watched any tape on De Randamie if I'm being 100% honest my man, I am just that certain purely based on their credentials

>>74001622
>I honestly haven't even watched any tape on De Randamie

Lol I knew it!

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Post a picture with more talent.

>>74001614
they aren't real though

>>74001628
I'll probably be right though m8
If I'm not I will publicly apologise to you on /heem/

>>74001615
Believe me, plenty of Slav landlords here feel the same way.

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based julian

>>74001514
>she can stop the clinch because she has a black belt in jitz and got outgrappled on the floor by Zingano!

Mhmmmm, yes, tell me more.

Dennis Bermudez vs. Chan Sung Jung
Alexa Grasso vs. Felice Herrig
Abel Trujillo vs. James Vick
Ovince Saint Preux vs. Volkan Oezdemir
Anthony Hamilton vs. Marcel Fortuna
Jéssica Andrade vs. Angela Hill
Adam Milstead vs. Curtis Blaydes
Chas Skelly vs. Chris Gruetzemacher
Ricardo Ramos vs. Michinori Tanaka
Tecia Torres vs. Bec Rawlings
Alex Morono vs. Niko Price
Daniel Jolly vs. Khalil Rountree

what are the 3 best fights on this card?

>>74001652
didnt this guy get memed on by Ben 10?

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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sFr8RgAxMeA and your mutha is a slut

>>74001630
Can I touch them? Then they're real.

>>74001659

Lol why are you still latching onto this you idiot? haha the fight already happened and your nonsense about avoiding the clinch got blown out in 48 seconds. Such a sore loser lol

>>74001669
Grasso, Andrade, Torres.

>>74001633
>B-But Arlovski will jabfest to a decision,trust me I'm a heem analyst

why does heem shill for old justed fighters

>>74001669
Dennis Bermudez vs. Chan Sung Jung
Abel Trujillo vs. James Vick
Tecia Torres vs. Bec Rawlings

>>74001659
>and got outgrappled on the floor by Zingano!
m8, she was destroying Cat until she gassed

>>74001673
not legally

>>74001670
apparently he got knocked out by a woman who soccer kicked him while wearing a boot

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>>74001680

Aussies m8

>>74001669
abel, alexa, dennis

did predictioncuck quit?

>>74001676
No no, please, I really want to hear more about how Nunes would beat Rousey in BJJ.

>>74001684
You say that like it makes it better. Rousey could have started out with Zingano in full mount and she would have armbarred her inside of a minute.

UFC 208 is fucked
http://www.bloodyelbow.com/2017/2/2/14479466/ufc-208-new-york-commission-pulls-luis-henrique-eye-surgery-mma-news

>>74001726
>Rousey could have started out with Zingano in full mount and she would have armbarred her inside of a minute.
>Nunes was outgrappling Zingano
>this somehow does not matter
are you ok?

>>74001414
They're not going to fight an MMA match.

what if brunson runs into one of anderson's counters

>>74001435
Grasso is a top qt

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>>74001695
>>74001514

>this faggot that pores through the archives taking screencaps cause he thinks he's the official record keeper of /heem/

Holy shit get a life, you fucking loser.

>>74001746
>Nunes was unable to use her grappling to finish Zingano

This matters.

>>74001750
Brunson is going back to being a blanket.

>>74001726
Fuck's sake mate just shut the fuck up about Ronda for once. Yeah, the unwashed masses think she's a shitter since she lost, so what? Let it go.

>>74001750
what if brunson knocks out silva in under 3 minutes?

>>74001545
no, jack is a pudgy androgynous numale

>>74001760
No but she was able to use her grappling to beat the shit out of Zingano.
Ronda is nowhere near as tough (imo)

Either way, Rousey got BTFO and so did you.

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who will keep the 145 pound belt warm for her?

>>74001742
Who?

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>>74001775

>>74001775
>Shevchenko beats nunes
>goes up to beat Holm again
>UFC makes 125
>goes down to beat Joanna again
>defends four times a year

ALL THE BELTS

>>74001775
>>74001796
Do they have different dads?

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>I have a job
>I do t like Cheetos
>4chan passes make people jealous
>I'm not a pedophile
>Schaub isn't gay

Adding a women's featherweight division is like if middleweight didn't exist and they added a super heavyweight division instead

>>74001742
new york was a mistake

>>74001805
Who doesnt like cheetos? Whenever I get a variety pack, I save the cheetohs for last cause theyre my favorite.

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>>74001805
Doesn't surprise me the h8er has a mandrama gif.

>>74001043
she is a rabid one though, all of her twitter feed is about black people for some reason

Reminder cleaning is for cookie cutters and is just time that would be better spent training, sleeping, or eating.

https://youtu.be/9FkMmNb4ZjU

>>74001823
I'm sure mandrama guys like Lesnar or Lashley could beat Schaub

>>74001811
kek

>>74000918
>mentioning sadpanda

degenerate spotted

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>>74001823
We all have at least one

>>74001842
>Lashley
Now let's not be silly.

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Bermudez vs Jung
Grasso vs Herrig
Vick vs Trujilo
Saint Preux vs Oezdemir
Hamilton vs Fortuna
Andrade vs Hill

>>74001145
>that walk off at the end

tell me he isnt a bull

>>74001856
wheres the real preditction guy

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>>74001854
The only mandrama pic you need

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>>74001856
DENNIS
ALEXA
JAMES
OVINCE
ANTHONY
JÉSSICA

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>>74001856
KZ
Grasso
Vick
OSP
Hamilton
Andrade

>>74001871
he's dead and im here to replace him. i think i do a better job :)

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>posting images says something about your interests or personality
>*posts 50+ images of another man's child*

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>>74001856
Bermudez
Grasso
Trujilo
OSP
Hamilton
Andrade

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>>74001856
Bermudez via ringrust
Grasso via cute
Vick
Saint Preux
Hamillton
Andrade

>>74001887
Predicitoncuck 2.0 is dead!

Love live predictioncuck 3.0!

>>74001877
is this real?

>>74001498
>>74001535
is there a herrig edition? she shows more bunda

>>74001855
Against Schaub? You don't think so?

>>74001903
what? i am 2.0. also pls no cuck

>>74001905
"Stop being a useless ------- and do something for yourself"

>>74001912
No youre not.

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>>74001856

Bermudez
Grasso
Trujilo
Saint Preux
Hamilton
Andrade

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>>74001726

Dude please stop lol

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>>74001856
Jung
Grasso
Trujilo
OSP
Hamilton
Andrade

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>>74001924
i am, friend. its me

>>74001757

One day I'm going to show up at your house with a screen of all your posts on heem and show them all to your mommy. What will you do then kid?

>>74001909
I was more just trying to make a point about Lashley being a product of favourable matchmaking.

>>74001749
wat

>>74001749

But they are

>>74001659
Thats not what anyone said lol

>>74001749
lmao what the fuck
Two great strikers tends to end up as a grappling match half the time, and besides MMA still doesn't play like kickboxing if they're just standing.

>>74001757

>He's too brain-dead to know how to use the archives

Very sad!

>>74001979
>>74001965
>>74001962
I was kidding.

>>74001985
I certainly hope so!

>>74001985
>I was kidding.
this destroys heem

*portions screencaps*

>>74001942
>>74001980
>replying twice cause you didnt get a (You) right away

lol it's you again. Youre in the top 5 biggest losers on /heem/

>>74001999
kek this guy gets it

>>74001995
I was pretending to be kidding

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You fucking mirin cunt, you mirin brah?

Lol who gets triggered by screenshots? If anything I'll start taking more of them just cause I know it pisses some sperglord off even more.

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I'm really pleased with how the portion meme has taken off. It seems like it's a been a long time since we've had a really good organic, locally-sourced meme.

>>74002013
>le fake news man

Trudeau would heem that pussy

>>74002009

You have serious autism dude lol calm down, take a deep breath.

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>>74001856
Jung
Grasso
Vick
OSP
Fortuna
Andrade

>>74002014
*portions XXXL powder blue polo shirt*

(am i doing it right?)

>>74002026
No he wouldn't. Alex wrestled in high school.

>>74002049
give me the oldest one you've got

>>74002026
>Trudeau
>heeming anyone

https://youtu.be/WuGtYNnlYS8

>>74002037
Precisely

If you heem your enemies they win

>>74001912
2.0 here. yeah you're 3.0.

>>74002037
Trudeau has competed in boxing before, jones gases just from one of his episodes

>>74002066
Your point? CM Punk has competed in MMA before

>>74002053

They're mostly just the stuff Australia says lol, he says some really whacky stuff, didn't know it'd trigger some American sperg who thinks it takes longer than 30 seconds to go through archives lol

>>74002066
Wrestling beats boxing

Its a simple fact

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>having such a shit computer your screencaps are tiny resolution

lol maybe someday you'll get a job and you can save up and buy a decent shitposting machine

>>74002079
CM Punk would wipe the floor with Trudeau, Alex, and everyone ITT.

>>74002084
>They're mostly just the stuff Australia says lol
There's like four regular Aussies. The Ronda guy is pretty nutty though.

>>74001967
Except the goof who kept telling me that Nunes having a black belt means that she'd beat Rousey on the ground.

>anyone getting 6 fights correct
it took me 8 submissions just to get 4 fights correct last weekend

Is liking alex jones a meme or do you people actually believe the crazy shit he says?

>>74002087
>wrestling beats boxing
>muay thai beats boxing

what doesn't beat boxing, honestly?

>P-p-lease notice me sempai

Lol imagine getting triggered by SCREENSHOTS Hahahahahaha nigga like what else do you get mad at? Just walk away from the screen.

>>74002115
he's literally never wrong

>>74002104
No one said that either. This is you making stuff up to distract from your own horrible opinions

>>74002116
Conor McGregor

ZING

>>74002115
he's like a crazy uncle desu

>>74002022
that's because i've been off of heem and not forcing them everyday

i own heem

>>74002115
The cool thing about being crazy is that when you're right, even once, people come to you for answers.

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>that proud feeling when my screencaps are super high res and easy to read

>>74002126
He actually quite frequently is and when he is he gives some bullish excuse as to why it didnt

>>74002127
Don't make me get screenshots at you.

>>74002104

Lol you kept telling people that Ronda was going to win via armbar in 60 seconds, your reasoning was cause Cat beat Nunes then Ronda was going to do the same, and that Amanda could do nothing to stop Ronda's strong clinch.

You have the worst "MMA Analysis" on /heem/ by far, you stick out like a sore thumb.

>>74002146
show me

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Be honest: do you own any MMA related clothing?

>>74001856
Jesus Christ what a shit card.

>>74002147
name one thing he's ever been wrong about

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>Picking BJ is easy money
>Arlovski by decision

Please stop betting Australia

>>74002115
>he didn't make 6k betting on the locked up Trump win at 14/1

JUST

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>>74002155

>>74002155
Kind of.
I have one of those represent t shirts nate diaz always wears plus a represnt hoodie

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>>74002154
Whats nice is on mac I can cmd shift 4 and it will let me frame the part I want capped. I dont have to crop it in paint like a poorfag on a windows machine.

>>74002153
>your reasoning was cause Cat beat Nunes then Ronda was going to do the same

You're illiterate, but that's okay!

>>74002155
I bought a Conor McGregor jersey at Reebok

Was originally just trying to get a track jacket but it was the only medium and it was $21 instead the original $80

Took it as a sign from God and bought it

>>74002153
Not even that he and countless other tards said that Nunes didnt remotely have any tools that Holly had and was over-aggressive and would walk straight into the clinch

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this makes me irrationally angry

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i sincerely hope you have already bet on your andrade hamilton trujillo parlay

>>74002176
i dont know if you know this but on windows we there is snipping tool that does the exact same thing since XP. pls update your windows insults
t. guy that use a mac at work

>>74002176
looks good senpai

>>74002186
he loves it here, his brother owns a farm in saskatchewan

>>74002176

>Crop it in paint

Lol but that's not what I do you nimrod

>>74002186
Only burgers with wealth are allowed to live here

stay out PEASANT

>>74002204
No I didnt. I used to push prnt scrn and then crop in paint.

>>74002190
Vick will box abel up senpai

>>74002186
If it makes you feel better, he gave a shout out to America and not Canada.

He also doesn't support Trudeau