>>22765677 >>22766132 If you haven't had anxiety and depression (only anxiety myself, I'm as fucking happy as it possibly could be with severe anxiety), you don't know. You can easily feel alone and depressed being in a relationship. I've actually cut off an engagement because I knew it would be too complicated in the long run, and happy about my decision to do so. My anxiety made me close up and stay by myself for long periods of time to handle it We're still friends and hang out now and then, but less and less since we both still have feelings (but have a friends-with-benefits arrangement as long as she's single). I just don't feel I can be in a relationship the way I am now. It hurts her and it hurts me hurting her.
>>22766154 Nobody is saying you can't be anxious or depressed in a relationship. We just have a lot less sympathy since you have been lucky enough to have someone committed to you. I think we save our sympathy for the people who are anxious and depressed and don't have someone willing to commit their life to being with you. Kind of like if I'm going to give some money away I'll give it to someone who doesn't already have a trust fund.
>>22766158 It's a two-edged sword. If you're in a relationship and you know you're hurting your partner, it can be even worse. Breaking off the engagement was the best I could do. We both feel much better, even though we miss the shit out of each other. Living with someone with anxiety (and probably depression) is not easy and often you're better off alone. I've pretty much set my mind to be alone forever from now on, unless I by some miracle gets better. But that's not going to happen. And I'm fine with that now. I've had my share of love, I think I can handle living on my own from now on. At least I was lucky enough to experience true love.
>>22766177 Depends a lot on the severity. My anxiety is at the level I think I'm going to die a couple of times a day and I always have prepared some water in case I go into complete panic mode and have to sit in a corner and ride it out. If it's not that intense and your partner understands, you should be fine. We had 3 wonderful years together before I put my foot down and said this is just hurting and frustrating in the long run and doesn't seem to get better. I love her to death, but it was for the best. She didn't agree, but understood and I think she does agree deep down. Again, we're still good friends so I haven't lost her completely and we actually do quite well as friends now. A little heart-ache, but it's not killing me and I was genuinly happy when I heard she was dating again.
Though honestly, also happy when I heard it didn't work out, hehe.
>>22766224 Generalized anxiety, mostly health-anxiety. I like to work out and swim 4 times pr. week, but I can get into panic just from getting my heart rate up, so yeah. I've kind of gotten better when it comes to death fears. Ever since I was a kid I had panics due to that, and I just thought everyone had it like that and didn't understand how people dealt with it. Well, seems they don't, hehe. Long walks with a good podcast on my ear helps ... as long as I'm walking and listening to podcasts. As soon as I get back home the anxiety comes back at full terror. But again, I'm not depressed. I absolutely fucking love life. I've had several psychologists and psychiatrists and they've asked me if I could please meet up with their groups to show that you can be happy with anxiety. But I have too much anxiety to speak to big groups, hehe.
Nah, we're not getting back together. I don't see me getting better without hard medication, and I don't want to take zombie-drugs. I will much rather deal with the attacks and constant fear and enjoy the small things than being a fucking zombie.
>>22766265 Ah, again, better to have love and lost, than never have loved, and I believe we will be friends forever. We both share a strong passion for animals. She is quite active in dog exhibitions (which would freak me the hell out to participate in) and I love birds. I have a couple of extremely intelligent parakeets and considering getting a bigger parrot at some point. I am also the only one she trusts to take care of her dogs if she's busy, so we kind of can't cut contact, hehe. One of her dogs just won a couple of regional awards as well, she really knows her stuff. Pic related, our little baby.
It truly sucks that people think it's as easy as just finding a partner and then everything magically fixes itself. That there's nothing to worry about in life other than having someone to love, or since this is /soc/, fuck. Yeah, nah, if you've ever gone through anything truly hard you'd know that's not what it's like.
With that said: F, 24, in a relationship but seriously severely depressed. Also finding it even worse now that I'm in a relationship and living with someone for the first time 'cause I need to care for so much more than just myself even though I spend most my energy on thinking about dying or trying not to think about dying.
I, or we maybe, could probably need some friends. When ignoring my shitty brain and its issues I'm pretty fucking funny and nice and totally friend material.
>>22766412 I actually found having friends even harder. I have a good bunch of really good friends, but then it's hard managing your energy to keep up with them. Luckily, I have the best friends in the world that understands my shit, so I try my best to visit and get visited and I never hear a bad word, quite the opposite. I'm fucking lucky.
>>22766432 My boyfriend is amazing and all but I guess having a relationship and sharing a home with someone is more demanding than hanging out with friends, I don't know. I find it more exhausting trying to keep a straight face at home and take care of him and us, you know? Then again I don't really meet friends often either though, but they really do understand why.
I'm so depressed and only function because I have 2 friends that drag me around. They take me to work and make me cook and eat with them. I'm suprised I haven't gotten fired from my job, I don't have the motivation to do anything lately. Nothing really motivates me anymore. I only keep going because there are people I love, and I don't want to hurt them. Have had a few nasty suicides in the family, and that's not how I want to go out. It's ironic that the main reason I interact with people is because I tried to make it look like an accident last thanksgiving, crashed my car, came out without a scratch, and got a dui. So now I'm on everyone's radar cause they want to drive me around and shit. I'm from a small town and own guns and shit, but gave them to a friend to hold for me so I don't do anything impulsive. I really used to be happy and enjoy life, and hope to get back there somehow. Kik: found.waldo
>>22765638 >with me and my boyfriend. That's called real fucking life. No one wants to be friends with you ...and your boyfriend. Our entire purpose in life is mating, we just want to fuck you. Your boyfriend is no different. fuck off.
>>22770772 Look chica, you're going about this all wrong. 99% sure you're a troll but just in case you're just a retarded autist lets get some things straight.
Most people with crippling anxiety can fake it well enough to make friends, it's much less risky and can be achieved with relatively little effort. But to take it a step farther and look for companionship is incredibly triggering. You have to actually open up to someone and deal with rejection head on, and you have to try and prove yourself to them. Then when you have someone interested in you you can only see bad things happening down the line, because that's what anxiety does.
That said, to say you have anxiety problems then to close with "Oh but me and my boyfriend just wanna talk you guys are repulsive XD" is incredibly moronic way of trying to reach out these people who have so much trouble in and fear of connecting with people.
tl;dr: You're either a horrible person who's trying to get some sick satisfaction out of people's disabilities or you're a literal autist who can't even empathize with people whom share the exact same condition with you.
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