How do normal people get girlfriends? Do they ask a girl out?

>How do normal people get girlfriends? Do they ask a girl out?
I guess some of them use dating sites? I've also heard that a lot of them meet girls through common friends.
>Are you allowed to touch your girlfriend's private areas whenever you want? Like can just grab her boobs or feel her butt in private? Can you walk around naked near your girlfriend? Will she walk around naked near you?
Probably depends on a lot of variables

>>35377705
If you've been dating long enough she'll probably let you do whatever you want whenever. Unless she's some feminazi. That's how it is with my gf. I just fondle her boobs or reach into her pants when i feel like it. She does the same

I'd tell you if I knew.

>>35377705
Well I'm a "normie" who identifies as a suicidal r0b0t and let me tell you how I got my last two girlfriends: you know how they say "be yourself" well take the concept of "yourself" and do a better version of it. A hollywood, scripted version of yourself. Be yourself but only smoother and more funny and with better words. Turn it on for the women you're interested in. Turn it off for the people you don't give a fuck about because it's hard to keep that shit up all day

My last girlfriend kinda just walked up to me during lunch at work and we just talked. I was confident that she was into me so I asked if she could give me a ride home after work, we kissed at the end of that ride and made plans for dinner that Friday.

The girl I dated before that was actually a customer at my job. She asked me if the coat she was trying on looked good and I said something like "can I think about it and call you back later?" she wrote her number on my palm

The real me doesn't talk like that. But the guy who I portray does

You may be a loser but there are aspects of your character that will be appealing to certain types of women. You're a depressed, angsty shit? Do the movie version of that and get hot art hoes. You're an insecure meathead? Do the movie version of that and get instagram thotties. It's about appearing complex and interesting and a little larger than life, like a movie character

Goes without saying that physical attraction matters so if you're TOO fat or TOO ugly, work on your appearance first. Put in the effort. If you want a woman, and you're not Chad, you have to bring your A-Game, you have to be better when talking to her than you are with everyone else. Not just with canned lines but with thinking on your feet, with your body language and mannerisms, with your reactions - all things that a good actor knows how to manipulate

>How do normal people get girlfriends?

They are attractive to girls.

It's the only difference, really. Don't you notice how different girls threat man who are handsome?

>>35377705

>Are you allowed to touch your girlfriend's private areas whenever you want? Like can just grab her boobs or feel her butt in private?

I haven't dated a girl who minded as long as it was in private. Tho actually the majority of them liked for me to grab their ass in public in front of other people. I don't even consider ass a private area at this point. Often at work women will come up and touch my arm or my back to ask a question and my instinct is to touch their butt - I have to catch myself

>Can you walk around naked near your girlfriend? Will she walk around naked near you?

Yup all the time. If you just had sex, it's kinda awkward to get fully dressed just to lounge around but I prefer to wear a robe or something because I don't know. I wasn't raised right, never got comfortable being in the complete nude

t. >>35377936

>>35377845
What if you asked to sniff your girlfriend's butthole? Would she allow it?

>>35377936
>My last girlfriend kinda just walked up to me during lunch at work and we just talked. I was confident that she was into me so I asked if she could give me a ride home after work, we kissed at the end of that ride and made plans for dinner that Friday.

Seriously fuck off Chad.

>>35377978
I don't know. I don't really observe women's interactions with other men. I do know that women totally ignore me though, and have a real disdain for me. For example girls at the checkout at stores won't look at me or smile at me at all and seem very eager to be rid of me and not give me any signal whatsoever that they don't hate every single atom of me.

I've also never noticed a girl looking at me. Not ever. They some sort of sixth sense that allows them to look anywhere BUT me. No girl has ever looked at me, even with disgust. I'm just invisible, like any boring inanimate object.

A girl has never been kind to me or said kind things to me. They keep all our interactions as short as humanely possible. Not an extra word is ever said, they are always keen to put an end to our interactions as much as they can.

>>35377705
Well I'm a complete robot and I met my girlfriend through a common friend. He invited me to a study group and it just happened.

We kind of clicked, so I didn't need to court her or ask her out or anything. It was obvious we liked each other and my friend was giving me the insider info from her so I knew she liked me and one day I just asked her to hang out and we ended up spending the night just chilling together. We made it clear we were official and exclusive, maybe a few days after that.

I can touch her whenever I want, wherever I want, given we have some degree of privacy. Even in a library, we're always kind of handsy with each other. She'll walk naked around me, and me around her although i'm super insecure about my body and I'm pretty sure she is as well.

I like >>35377936 's tip. That was essentially what I did. I was myself, but a better version of it. And over time, I didn't have to play the role as much.

>>35378034
That's very interesting. What does it feel like to grab a girl's ass? I imagine it would feel incredibly satisfying.

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>>35377705
I have the exacty same thoughts and feelings.

I am convinced the memes are true, that women are naturally disgusted by beta males and we inhabit a different world to normies. Chad says one word, he mutters "twat", "prick", "nerd" or "prat" because we knew the answer to a question the teacher asked, then, from then on, we are designated betas and girls are viscerally disgusted by us.

>>35377936
>you know how they say "be yourself" well take the concept of "yourself" and do a better version of it. A hollywood, scripted version of yourself.

I hear this a lot, and I understand how it works in theory, but not in practice. I can keep up a similarish act for people I don't know well, but only for short bursts. And certainly if I end up becoming familiar with them my natural self (which is just not going to be attractive to many women) will inevitably start slipping out. So even if you do get a girl interested with that "act", do you just keep that up for the entirety of y'alls relationship? Wouldn't that get tiring or otherwise just make it not worth it?

Also, I recognize this is likely a romanticized view of relationships based out of my own naivete, but I just have an inherent moral aversion to doing something like that. How could I possibly expect to base some kind of a meaningful relationship on what is essentially a lie?

For example, I'm sort of a musician, and I like reading poetry and literature and bullshit like that. I could probably more or less pass myself off as some withholding tortured artist type, but that is completely contrary to how I naturally behave and contradicts a number of my other interests. Not to mention I probably just would not be interested in the kind of girls that attracts anyways. Also there are a number of physical characteristics I have that further complicate things, but I wont get into them. This is just all starting to seem pretty hopeless.

>>35377705
I'm trying out "Oh, before I forget; you wanna go out some time?" tonight.

I've always found that it tends to be an emotional connection rather than a physical one. Over time you sorta push your boundaries in terms of what both of you are comfortable with, and you figure out when it is and isn't appropriate to touch the butt.

Hell, I touched a female friend of mine's butt once. She didn't necessarily seem to hate it (which is weird considering the uberfeminist she became), she just was like "No...no don't do that..." like I was fuckin' 9 or some shit.

>>35378243
Most people are disgusted by beta males, not just women. Why would anyone want to associate with a 20 something perma virgin reprobate who have interests not limited to anime, collecting swords, and obesity?

Get over your crippling fear of rejection in life, stop playing vidya and start failing and getting back up and learn that small wins beget bigger wins. Like maybe start by leaving your mom's basement while she's getting fucked by the local pizza delivery boy.

>>35377705
>How do normal people get girlfriends?
They talk to girls who also very much like talking with them. Add sexual tension, and you have a girlfriend.
>Do they ask a girl out?
Most of the time.
>What words do they use? "Want to go on a date"?
>How do you know if you're officially girlfriend and boyfriend?
Officially, when you both declare it.
>Are you allowed to touch your girlfriend's private areas whenever you want?
Kek, no.
>Like can just grab her boobs or feel her butt in private?
if she's fine with it. A lot of times she will be if it's a good relationship.
>Can you walk around naked near your girlfriend?
In private, sure. In a public place like a park, that's a no go.
>Will she walk around naked near you?
Not necessarily, but you could expect it at some points.
>I honestly just can't imagine it at all. It doesn't make any sense to me. I don't think any girl would ever be anything other than revolted at me and disgusted that I'm even alive and in their presence. It's amazing to think that some people have girlfriends and those girlfriends let them have sex with them, touch them, walk around naked near them, etc.
Well, I mean if you're just gonna bitch about it, you're prolly not gonna have a decent time being an incel.

>>35378089
It's sad that this post was made on the original content board. At least vary it up and insult asians or something once in a while.

>>35378340
>Most people are disgusted by beta males, not just women. Why would anyone want to associate with a 20 something perma virgin reprobate who have interests not limited to anime, collecting swords, and obesity?
Most people don't actively think about if someone is a beta male or not. Most people don't even know what a "beta male" is. Most people pay no mind to most people they see or talk to on a daily basis.

>>35377705
A gf who really likes a guy will pretty much let her do anything he wants to her.
All those amateur porn videos with girls doing hot sexy shit... those are normal chicks man.

>>35378068
Some girls will algo that, like my ex ex gf
The last gf i had wouldnt allow things like that, i did anal on her like three times top. She has some loose asshole then farts always came out, once straight to my face

>>35378479
lmfao! wow, that's fucked up

>>35377705
How can anyone look at an asshole and not immediately want to suck on it?

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>>35377705
To respond to your first question.... I think >>35377936 is on the money here. Be a super good version of yourself that you think normal girls will like. No /r9k/ or autism bullshit. And like >>35378144 said, you kind of wane it off after time. You have to be confident that they'll be okay with who you like... really are if it's not that much different from the best version of yourself. It's hard to explain, but like >>35378144 said, you just play the role less as time goes on in the relationship and you guys get comfortable with each other. This is pretty much how things went with my current gf. I always acted like my best self around her, and she ended up getting feelings for me somehow. She asked me out and now it's been a month in our relationship. I used to be more nervous around her but now being with her is like being with a friend. Who I can do dirty stuff with, of course. And she doesn't mind my autism when it comes out.

>>35377705
My gf also pretty much just confessed her feelings to me after we went out to dinner one night. It was super unexpected.

>private areas whenever?
Haven't done this yet with her but it's something I'm 99.9% sure she'd be fine with if it's in private. I'll try it out next time I'm alone with her

Be more confident in yourself man. You don't have to be ultra confident or anything because I most definitely am not, but just try to think you have some redeemable qualities, and that you're a decent looking guy.

>>35378329
It's really hard to explain, but it's not really a lie. It's like... ugh. You know how it is when you're trying like super hard on things? It's like that. Like obviously your demeanor is a little bit different but you're still trying super hard at that thing. But the thing is here you have to cool it off and slowly act more naturally as you guys become closer. I can act pretty naturally around my gf now even though I was trying kinda hard not to mess up when I first met her before we were dating.

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>>35378479
This brings up another question.
How do couples handle flatulence? Do they generally do it around each other as if they were alone?

Those are girls that are promised heroin, most of them anyways

>>35378329
This is an interesting post mostly because it just works very differently for me

> I can keep up a similarish act for people I don't know well, but only for short bursts. And certainly if I end up becoming familiar with them my natural self (which is just not going to be attractive to many women) will inevitably start slipping out. So even if you do get a girl interested with that "act", do you just keep that up for the entirety of y'alls relationship? Wouldn't that get tiring or otherwise just make it not worth it?

Maybe it's tiring but maybe that's good. To me it's about personal progress in a way. If I can be this cooler version of myself - even if it's a lie at the moment - then why not? My real feelings and personality are for my real friends it's all privileged information. Over time yes the real me may slip out but isn't it a good thing if I can learn to suppress those ugly thoughts and feelings and all the things that push people away? And it's not like over time you can't let your act down. You have to, it's inevitable and at that point she'll feel like your connection is even deeper - on a new level

>How could I possibly expect to base some kind of a meaningful relationship on what is essentially a lie?

That's where our worldview differs. I assume everyone is being dishonest in their own way so I don't feel bad about it. And even when I've gotten to the stage where we're supposed to be more open and honest and whatnot. I don't know, I've just never felt bad about being dishonest. I think because my life has been no picnic, I feel like I deserve it in a way. My karma will balance out

>This is just all starting to seem pretty hopeless.

It's all about the journey man. Forget about whatever it is that you think may undermine your ability to reach your ultimate goal. Fuck the goal. Seriously. Forget about reaching the mountaintop and just focus on climbing and before you know it you're there

>>35378340
nice normy memes

>20 something perma virgin reprobate who have interests not limited to anime, collecting swords, and obesity
Why would someone want to live like this? Because it is preferable to the outside world where men with the slightest flaw are branded subhumans and treated like garbage and never given a chance to socialize and become the men society wants them to be. Teachers, careers advisors, even doctors, nearly everyone fucks with me. I have nerve damage but literal doctors who swore the hippocratic oath gave me that look of disgust and accused me of faking it.

The sheer hate directed at me is incredible.

>fear of rejection in life
That is easy to say. For normies life is like rolling a dice until you get a 6. Do it long enough it is inevitable, you think nothing of getting 1-5, only to keep rolling.

However not everyone has the same chances. We stay inside and we are scolded for being a loser. We go outside and we are socially excluded just for not having 100% perfect Chad social skills. All the faces of my dice are 1.

>>35378183
Incredibly satisfying? The feeling is indescribably. Just immense pride and joy.

One time I had an internship where I supervised a bunch of snotty high school brats. They would obey my orders but grudgingly. I would say "Go do this" and they'd be like "Why? Um, ok"

Shit like that. One day my 9/10 girlfriend swung by my job site to pick me up, we were gonna go out so she was done up and dressed up. She came up by my side and in front of all my students I wrapped my arm around her waist, pulled her in close and grabbed a handful of her ass.

I asked her to go wait in the car and one of my students just blurted out "Anon, is that your girlfriend??"

I said "something like that" and they all just went into several variations of "DAMN" "She bad as hell" "She's fine" you know, shit like that.

You would not believe how much they respected - even idolized me - after that. They never questioned me again. It was always "Go do that" and they'd be like "Oh for sure Anon" "I got you Anon" "I'm on it right away"

They would ask me for advice on how to get girls, they'd pick up my lunch, hell one kid even wanted my blessing before getting a certain haircut.

It was amazing. And whether or not anyone is there to see it, that's how it feels when I grab a girl's ass each and every time

>>35378407
Sorry.

that's like asking an asian on how to fail a test

>>35377705
>How do you know if you're officially girlfriend and boyfriend?

Apparently, so I've heard, in the US it's custom to ask the other person if they want to be your girlfriend/boyfriend. Is that true?
That's ridiculous. It happens naturally, you shouldn't have to confirm anything.

>>35378634

My girlfriend first hid it from me, but then she farted and I found it funny and cute. Then she would do it and I'd joking scorn her.
I want to die.

>>35378634
At some point in the relationship, you will become comfortable letting it out in front of each other. By this time, one partner should be the disgusting one (DO) and the other will be the designated shy one (SO). Usually the man is the DO, although not necessarily.

When the DO rips, the SO will remind the DO how naughty he/she is. A punch to the shoulder should get the message across. If the SO lets one out, the DO should do something gross, for instance by taking a deep breath through the nose. The SO will muster a blush and tsk tsk at the DO.

These roles create an equilibrium that negates most of the awkwardness of the situation.

>>35378634

depends on the couple. some people let em rip with no cares in the world

my gf and i are more private about farts and generally dont fart around each other. if we do by accident we laugh about it

>>35379518

>shouldnt have to confirm anything

not sure what shithole you're from, but it makes sense to confirm dating exclusivity in a culture where there's a whole spectrum of potential male/female interactions

>>35379755

I'm not a relationship expert, but to me it seems like it would happen without any need to tell. I mean, if you're being intimate with someone for weeks, surely both of you can come to the conclusion that you're in a relationship now. Unless both of you are very promiscuous, but that seems to be a niche case.

>>35379959

>seems like a niche case

hookup culture is prevalent nowadays. if you never confirm that you're exclusive, you open her up to the possibility of saying "tee hee, i didnt know we were like...DATING" when you find out she fucked some other guy even if you were being intimate for weeks beforehand.

if you verbally agree to date, there's no hoping or guessing needed

>>35377705
you know robot, with time I found myself in situations in which I just had to adapt more or less, so I just had to do SOMETHING and it usually turned out very awkward and bad, but I learnt from my mistakes so that I can function at the minimal level required

but I've never learnt how to have a girlfriend
the same questions you asked pester me since I was 12

>>35378144
I liked that one girl, I thought it was pretty obvious and she wasn't disgusted with my presence so I thought everything is going alright and it'll <click>
doesn't that make it more --official--?
but in the end she's dating my flatmate
I don't get it

>>35380046
Seems to be an american thing to sleep around while going on dates with someone.

>>35380198

yea...could be

all those answers reduce to
>it just happens
that's it
it just doesn't happen for me ever
thanks a lot

>>35378340
Why do men have to learn how to fail when women can just get fucked by the pizza delivery guy

>>35378384
This guy has it right, it's simple answers to your simple questions. The only people that would try to make this complicated are girls/guys that are golddiggers or some roasties with a self-inflated ego (ex: "I'm a 5/10 but I deserve a guy who is 6'3"!!!").

People are just looking for somebody they are both interested in and attracted too.

>>35379959
this
>>35380046
and this an absurd but very real threat

that's why I'm confused

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>>35378634
My girlfriend was in the shower yesterday. I opened the curtain slightly and farted directly at her then closed the shower curtain again.

> mfw I heard her gagging

>>35380236
>>35380213
one one hand it's that simple
ont the other we are still robots
something's not right

>All these scenarios where girls give out numbers

The life of a normie is a strange thing.

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>>35377705
Hahaha what the fuck are you asking here for, dude

Huh, brodawg? Do you know where you're at?

if a guy gets a girlfriend he usually get social signals from that girl before they got together.

if you ask 30 woman to a date and they refuse it means you are simply not attractive enough

>>35380218
undertated post

>>35380525
what do if unnactractive?

inb4 be yourself.

>>35377936
This sounds autistic af and you normies call us the autists

Normies truly are despicable

>>35377936
This.

Finally someone who understands it.

>>35380554
you pretty much can't do anything.
in terms of solutions i won't tell you to kill yourself because there is more to life then woman.
if you really need a woman go to eastern europe and marry some unfortunate woman, that's really all i can say

>>35377936
thanks for those hot pick up tips, mystery

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>>35378144
>I'm a complete robot
>my girlfriend

I'm not even perturbed anymore. It's just amusing that this is what it's come to

>>35380718
We are a dying race indeed.

>>35380718
Sad, isn't it?

It's probably just you and me who are true robots at this point, and I'm not so sure about you cause you could be anyone

>>35380730
Kind of sad really. Like watching an endangered species being overrun by a stronger invasive species

My ex had a fight with somebody late at night, and came to talk to me when she was sad. She was falling asleep, and I told her she could sleep over in my dorm room if she wanted.

So we went to bed, and just chatted for a while, and then I kissed her cheek and she kissed my lips. And that was pretty much it, we were together for three years.

how do you ask a girl out? how do you hang out?

normies explain yourselves

>>35380753
he refereed him as a larper you dummy
people with gf's don't come here, i know i wouldn't.

>>35378144
>I was myself, but a better version of it. And over time, I didn't have to play the role as much

This was basically me as well. At first I put on a facade as I tried to court my girlfriend, but over time I let loose and she saw my real personality. But I also grew more comfortable in her presence so it's not like I'm just awkward all the time, although she says that my awkwardness was something she found "cute" .

>>35378243
>>35378340
Some women like beta males. My girlfriend's ex was a 200 pound, 5'6" Asian manlet whose favourite hobbies included Starcraft, anime and Manga. He hated socializing and hated going outside. The trick is actually finding the girls who like betas, because they will not hang around the typical hookup areas. A lot of it would come down to luck.

>>35378127
how tall are you

oreganololi

>>35380799
I used to browse this board for six years before finding a girlfriend and losing my virginity at age 26. I am here to tell you people that there is hope, if only you would stop feeling sorry for yourselves, just for a short while.

>>35380574
>and you normies call us the autists

A normie would never use that word. That's your fucken problem. That's why nobody likes you. Look at the language you use, Most normies genuinely want to help you be social and make friends but I bet someone like you is a lost fucking cause

>>35380718
This always used to be the relationship board. You are just too new to know.

>>35380799
a girlfriend doesn't solve all your personal problems you moron.

if you're suicidal, have social anxiety, have depression, a shitty life, insane parents, etc. then you're a robot.

If you're just some teenager who hasn't had a girlfriend yet then YOU should fuck off

>>35377705
>How do normal people get girlfriends? Do they ask a girl out?
Yes. I ask the girl out to do something. I took my current girlfriend to putt putt on our first date and then we got mexican food. I whooped her ass the first time too.

>What words do they use? "Want to go on a date"? How do you know if you're officially girlfriend and boyfriend?
For this I think that it depends how old you are. In high-school it was much more set in stone about whether it was a date or not, you would literally say do you want to go on a date with me. As I've gotten older (26 now) it's more that you ask them to dinner or something else one on one, and then you do things during to make it apparent that it's a date if that was even ambiguous in the first place. (offer to pay for the meal, flirt, try and touch her by holding her hand, putting your arm around her etc. Normally at some point in the relationship you have a conversation about where it is going. In my experience this is after you have sex but if you're a virgin it might be a bit different for you, but I think a girl normally initiates that conversation, in my opinion. Then you decide together if you want to be exclusive or not, and if you both do, you're boyfriend and girlfriend.

>Are you allowed to touch your girlfriend's private areas whenever you want? Like can just grab her boobs or feel her butt in private? Can you walk around naked near your girlfriend? Will she walk around naked near you?
Yes, Yes, Yes. I wouldn't date a girl that isn't comfortable with that.

>I honestly just can't imagine it at all. It doesn't make any sense to me. I don't think any girl would ever be anything other than revolted at me and disgusted that I'm even alive and in their presence.
well yeah, I think that any girl would react like that to anyone who isn't chad. You have to make them have feelings for you so they want to do those things. It's not instantaneous.

how often do bf n gf hangout?

say they are in their 20s out of college, each living with their own roommates or whatever, and working 9-5 jobs in the big city

do they fuck every chance they get? what about moving in together, when does that happen; is it after several months of dating?

>t. 26KHHV

>>35380198
What country are you from anon where this isn't a possibility? It would be really nice if it didn't happen here in US. Unfortunately, it is relatively common here. Especially if you meet someone on a dating site.

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>>35377705
i know how but i wont teII you

>>35378144
just say you are a normie you are not one of us and you will never be one.

>>35380623
mystery is outdated af family

>>35380869
I don't want to be a fake actor faggot, if that's what it takes then I'd rather stay a hopeless virgin

>>35377705
if you want a gf get friends first. they will most likely introduce you to other guys and girls and maybe even help you to hook up with someone. if you cant maintain a friendship you shouldnt even try getting a gf anyway

also, unironically try being yourself. if people say that you arent playing a character they will open up earlier and feel more comfortable with you. and thats the key. making the girl feel comfortable
the difficult task for most people here is being honest without going full sperg, so basically knowing what is a good time for saying things

>>35378634
gf and I will fart on each other. It depends.

>>35377936
>"can I think about it and call you back later?"

How the fuck do you think of shit like that on the spot? I would just have gone "Y-yeah" because I couldn't think of anything better to say until long after she'd left.

>>35380970
> just say you are a normie you are not one of us and you will never be one

Is this a bad thing? Why would I want to be a tendy poster? Fuck off back to the basement

>>35380931
The fact you were even able to get a girlfriend is proof you aren't are robot and you don't have those problems

Don't you understand, robots by definition DO NOT get girlfriends it's not possible because what it takes to get a girlfriend means you're not a robot

>>35381032
>I'm a complete robot

>>35381032
Then why the fuck do you call yourself a robot

>>35381032
bitch I have more rights to post on this board then you normie shit pieces of shit. I post here everyday.

>>35381024
You see, I can't say things like that cause it's too obvious what your intentions are and at that point you may as well just ask "can I fuck you" cause it's pretty much the same thing

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>>35381089
>>35381059
>>35381055

Look, I made the animals squeal

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>>35377705

Normie chad here.

>How do normal people get girlfriends? Do they ask a girl out?

Meet a girl somewhere in a way which is unplanned (like at a bar or at work or at school, etc), if the two of you get along well (either on the first interaction or after repeated, unplanned interactions [like seeing them in class or whatever]) you then plan to spend time together.

If you are attracted to them, you say or do things to make that attraction clear. If they are attracted to you, they will say or do things that makes that attraction clear. If there is no attraction, you'll be rebuffed or you'll have to rebuff them. Both of you will eventually have said or done enough things to make it exceedingly obvious to both people what the score is.

If you both like each other and you are both attracted to each other, just saying "Can I take you out on a date?" is sufficient, but often unnecessary because it's understood between the two of you what the relationship consists of.

>How do you know if you're officially girlfriend and boyfriend?

At some point one person is going to say something like "are we boyfriend and girlfriend?" and the other person will either agree or disagree.

>Are you allowed to touch your girlfriend's private areas whenever you want? Like can just grab her boobs or feel her butt in private? Can you walk around naked near your girlfriend? Will she walk around naked near you?

Generally, yes, all of that's fine. That's the whole reason you get into an intimate relationship with someone - so that you can do shit like that, the things you can't (or won't) do with anyone else.

Some people will have different opinions about this of course. Some girls don't like being fully naked in front of their partners, others don't like to be groped, etc. Those are usually the chicks with Issues though.

>>35381195
I'm glad you have accepted your place as a normie

>>35377705
>How do normal people get girlfriends? Do they ask a girl out?
Sometimes, but it mostly evolves like this
>they meet
>they start talking
>????
>they start liking eachother
>they start flirting
>they fuck

>What words do they use? "Want to go on a date"? How do you know if you're officially girlfriend and boyfriend?
this is when shit gets tricky, because not even them know, they just "follow the flow" or "let things happen"

>Are you allowed to touch your girlfriend's private areas whenever you want?
not always, but in some cases yes

>Like can just grab her boobs or feel her butt in private?
it depends on the mood, but mostly yes

>Can you walk around naked near your girlfriend? Will she walk around naked near you?
this depends on the girl, but some couples are like that

>>35381203
Chad would never waste his time typing that bullshit out. You are cyborg at best.

>>35381230

Call it what you like. I've bedded many women and I shitpost here daily.

>>35380991
>I'd rather stay a hopeless virgin
lol ok good game then loser

>>35381024
>How the fuck do you think of shit like that on the spot?

By being honest. I genuinely didn't have an opinion on her coat so I just said that in my own way. Honesty is how rappers make rhymes and how comedians seem so funny and truthful. It's also the reason rap and comedy are usually so crude

>>35381129
>You see, I can't say things like that cause it's too obvious what your intentions are and at that point you may as well just ask "can I fuck you" cause it's pretty much the same thing
>may as well just ask "can I fuck you" cause it's pretty much the same thing
> pretty much the same thing

holy shit is this how some of you actually think?

>>35380426
>something's not right
it's like pottery

>>35381047
I am literally more of a robot than you will ever be. The fact that who I present as is not me and to interact with normal human beings requires extreme levels of emotional and mental programming means that I am by definition a robot and you are just a horny virgin

>>35381240
I can smell the beta on you my friend.

>bedded many women

ebin XDDD

>>35380933
>offer to pay for the meal

I really hope you don't do this you fucking beta

>>35381293

What is the acceptable, non-triggering way for me to talk about my sexual exploits? What phrase(s) can I use that won't cause you to have a meltdown?

It's all about your fee-fee's, after all.

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>>35381195
>hurrrrr jus pretending to be retarded
Your shitposting is abysmal, and your near nonexistent capacity for understating English makes me think you don't, and never will have a GF.

>>35381366
*understanding
Jesus, phoneposting blows.

>>35381291
Yeah and rich people can be poor. Once you can get a girlfriend you're not a robot anymore just like how someone who gains a million bucks is no longer poor

Doesn't matter if you still feel poor you're not poor.

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>>35381366
Do you actually speak like that?

No wonder you haven't gone anywhere near a vagina

>>35381366
> understating English makes me think you don't, and never will have a GF

Look at this philosopher

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>>35377936
>a girl never approached me
>too scared to talk to grills
fml baka senpai

But seriously, is women approaching men an american thing? I've read about it on the internet so many times, yet never seen it in Slavland.

>>35380718
On another non-english imageboard there was a board for robot-like people where you would be banned for even implying that you had friends or a gf. Over time more and more normalfags poured in, turning it to just another normalfag board. I wonder what's the cause behind normalfags flocking to places for losers instead of letting them be

>>35381295
eh I do on the first date, to make it clear that it's a date. I don't after that unless the girl is in financial trouble and I'm not.

Plus I have a decent amount of money, so I don't mind.

>>35381508
Normalfags always have to fit in, even if they don't.

Even in a board for losers they want to fit in and be a loser, so they pretend they are.

>>35381508
normies are fucking psychos, they like to laugh at people lower than them because they're so low themselves.

>>35381693
>they like to laugh at people lower than them because they're so low themselves.

Sure you're not describing yourself here, autismo?

>>35381693
Hahahahaha jajajajajajaja

>>35381746
>no you!
Normalfags, everyone.

>>35381508
You talking about ylilauta?

>>35377705
>What words do they use?
Do you think there is some sort if magic spell or guaranteed string of words that will get a woman to like you?

>>35381806
No, it's a bit obscure. Does ylilauta have a board like that too?

>>35381508
Let me explain it to you, some normalfags like/feel atracted to what they don't know/comprehend, so when they realise that there is a place full of weird people, they want to go there to take a look at how they are, if they get hooked with it, they will sooner or later make their friends get hooked too, and then, before they know it, almost the entire population of that place are normalfags circlejerking, they start to force their way of thinking and feel validated because now that place is full of people like them.

It happened to my old IB
It happened to /b/ (and most of 4chan)
And now it's happening here

the sad part is that this shit wont stop, the only way out is to create another place and start the comunity from zero all over again.
The shitty aspect of this is that it not only affects IBs, it affects every comunity, just to give a few examples:

>vidya
>anime/manga
>music
>art
>tabletop games
>politics

Every comunity can (and eventually will) go to shit thanks to normalfags that want to fit in where they don't belong.

>>35381798

It's that 100% of the time when people make these idiotic blanket generalizations, the person they are actually talking about is themselves.

Basic psychological truth, observable by anyone. If you haven't figured this one out yet, you may have autism.

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>>35381863

>When you post your feelings on life but some normalfags says you need to "work harder" and "stop complaining"

How can they be so cruel? I swear if someone was choking next to them they'd yell "YOU NEED TO WORK HARDER ON BREATHING"

>>35377705
i do/say whatever i want whenever i want when i get girls

they dont care

its all just about being attractive to them, if they think youre "cute" and "like you" you can literally do whatever

even cheat/hit on other girls

What do you even talk abut with girls though? Like on a first date? Even if i got that far which is unlikely i wouldn't even know what to do.

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I thought this place was supposed to be filled with irredeemable permavirgins. Wtf are all these normies doing here?

>>35381863
Someone post the pic related to this. You know, the one with two guys inventing a game and it being ruined by outsiders flooding into it

>>35381980
I don't know, girly shit like dresses and unicorns

>>35377936

>My last girlfriend kinda just walked up to me during lunch at work and we just talked.

Wow great advice, just continue to be passive like I've been doing for the last 23 years of my life which has gotten me fuck all in terms of female attention. This only works for Chad, if you're a sub 6 manlet this strategy will result in you becoming an 80 year old virgin.

>>35382006
>one of the biggest sites on the internet
>filled with permanvirgins

You guys have a weird view of 4chan. It isn't 2003 anymore, this is one of the biggest sites on the net, which means normies.

Normal people dont have "girlfriends".
They just have sex with random people and transform in "ghosts" when see pregnant women.

>>35377705

I had GFs back in high school. It was all based on having friends and getting to know them over time in classes. By the time I asked them out or they asked me out, we already knew each other pretty well so actually going on a date was just a formality at that point.

After HS, getting girlfriends was impossible. I have no idea how people actually meet on dating sites. I have had dates from them, but it just feels like being in a room with a stranger. Like it's really awkward and doesn't feel natural. I have no idea how people do it.

>>35381032
rather be fine with being a tendy poster than be a normie thats so fake and boring that they have to pretend to be a loser because its more interesting

>>35382089
No I mean r9k.

>>35381863
i think it's more to do with normies being devoid of any actual hobbies or passions so when they see people who do have those things, they try to force themselves in to have something in their lives less shallow than pretty much everything in their current life.

i think this is way you have so many obvious normies calling themselves robots, because it has more value than being a normie

>>35377936
>well take the concept of "yourself" and do a better version of it
But I don't know what I am

>>35382121
I know you did, but it's still a board on this site, and it gets mentioned on other boards too, so all it takes is normies from other boards to see it mentioned or just click on it out of curiosity.

This isn't some private board isolated from the rest of the site

>>35382178
Be nothing

>>35377705
honestly, if you like the person, just ask them. and no, you cant just grab her privates whenever you want, she has to consent.

>>35382188
I'd try if I had any idea what that means.

>>35382241
Try killing yourseIf

>>35382180
I guess the true autists are at cripplechan now.

>>35382241
Realize your identity is just a collection of memories. You can only truly be ''yourself'' if you get rid of the illusion of the self first.

>>35382006
Over 2014 /r9k/s fascination with Elliot Rodger was making it a bit more well known.
Then Chris Mercer happened, eggman was framed and aired on tv, then a giant wave of normalfags came in.
Some came in trying to act like the moral authority others posted nudes to try and stop the big bad /r9k/.

2016 /pol/ does chanology 2.0 and Trump wins, obviously these newfags only know /pol/ so they spread to the rest of the board, assuming it's all like /pol/, acting like the cancerous shits they are.

>>35377705
>How do normal people get girlfriends?
you usually meet a girl during something you guys have in common. School is a good way to do this, you'll have lots in common to talk about and whatnot
>Do they ask a girl out?
Sometimes, basically just be like "hey, we should do *whatever it is you wanna do, whenever it is you wanna do it*"
>What words do they use? "Want to go on a date"?
see above. Depends on the girl though, it's kind of a case by case basis so you've got to kind of do what feels right
>How do you know if you're officially girlfriend and boyfriend?
if you're sort of a thing with her, just be like "hey, what are we?" and have a conversation about what you both want
>Are you allowed to touch your girlfriend's private areas whenever you want? Like can just grab her boobs or feel her butt in private?
in private? Pretty much yeah, unless she's on her period or something. My girlfriend is apparently really turned on when I grab her ass, which as a butt guy is pretty alright
>Can you walk around naked near your girlfriend?
I usually wear a shirt but I've walked around with my dick out after busting and she's cool with it
>Will she walk around naked near you?
depends on the girl, they might be sensitive about their body so a lot of times they'll cover it up. Girls are weird about that

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>how to get a girlfriend

the only socially acceptable way is online dating, which only benefits chad

>>35381334
it's no use no matter what you say the second you say "friend/girlfriend" expect the shitposts friendo these threads are just bait to call out people for getting lucky

>I'm a complete robot
>I'm a suicidal robot
>Has GF, friends, good social skills and job that requires interacting.
go to >>>/b/
and don't come back.

>>35377705
>How do you know if you're officially girlfriend and boyfriend?
how the fuck this works?

>>35381203
Nowadays roasties are claiming boyfriend rape, so the whole gropping thing whenever you want thing might not be okay.

>>35378127
Unless you're massively fat, smell, and have acne everywhere you're lying.

Stop beating yourself up, man.

>>35378479

closet gay fuck

>>35377705
>How do normal people get girlfriends? Do they ask a girl out?
That's what I did.

>Are you allowed to touch your girlfriend's private areas whenever you want? Like can just grab her boobs or feel her butt in private?
I do with my current girlfriend, and most other girls I've dated after sexing for a while have been receptive, but it depends on the girl. If you're serious and really want it, and she doesn't like it, she'll let you but just to satisfy you in a huffy way. I think that's the hottest.

>Can you walk around naked near your girlfriend?
If you date a while, yeah. Who gives a fuck. Once you're mating with another human being for a while, some things go out the window. I piss in front of my significant other regularly, and she the same with me.

>Will she walk around naked near you?
It's my fetish that the girl stay naked at all times in private, and while she'll be really shy at first, you can work it. My girl doesn't wear clothes at home and I don't even need to tell her after years.

Just imagine a human being you're really comfortable around.

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>How do normal people get girlfriends? Do they ask a girl out?

Instead of asking that, be the abnormal person that can ask girls out. And by abnormal I don't mean le quirky, I mean channel that inner-hatred you have of women into a sort of pseudo-alpha confidence. Being kinda disdainful of women means you're more in-tuned to their bullshit and won't immediately fall for shit like fake crying, guilt-tripping or their general childlike mannerisms.

Basically, listen to a lot of Patrice O'Neal, learn from him. Some guys just have this natural ability to constantly love and forgive women for all the little things they do that might piss a more hateful man and if we could all be those types of men, then they'd sell it in pill form.

The next best thing is to realize you're not gonna be able to go about this the "normal" way, and then do the next best thing. Again, Patrice O'Neal was basically this man right up until his death. He was highly disdainful of women (he didn't "hate" them, he just thought of them more negatively than he did men), yet he constantly had women all throughout his life, including his attractive Brazilian wife right up until his death. And this wasn't because he was some alpha, aloof "HEH YEAH I'M SO SMOOTH AND I CAN SAY WHATEVER I WANT" type guy, it's because he knew how women worked (to a general degree) and acted towards them accordingly. It was almost autistic how observant he was, actually. It wasn't natural, to him, it was all through learning and experience.

BE that, calibrate it to your personal life and you can end up finding women virtually anywhere. Even by just meeting the sluts on Omegle. I've done this myself, in fact. Surprising amount of good looking, dumb women on that site.

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>>35378634
tfw your gf goes down on you and you fart in her face

>Are you allowed to touch your girlfriend's private areas whenever you want? Like can you just grab her boobs or but in private? Can you walk around naked near your girlfriend? Will she walk around naked near you?
I've been dating this girl's for about 3 years now and I think it was around a year and a half ago we started getting really comfortable with all the stuff you mentioned. However it took the first couple of sexual encounters to get to that point.

>>35377936

Reading this made me realize that im completely screwing myself with this one chick at work but I don't know.

She seems nice and definitely is qualified for sexy time in my books. She has approached me a couple of times and about a week ago she invited me along with some other coworker to lunch (he footed the tab, so a possible orbiter?) in all fairness I am the mystery man at work. I keep my mouth shut, don't participate in gossip/shit talking, do my job good, and bounce...

I catch her glancing across the room at me throughout the day and so I know the interest is there somewhat... unfortunately I just don't see myself walking up to her & her orbiter spewing garbage out of my mouth. She probably thinks im a raging autist or "too good for her" but honestly I just want to confirm things before I open my floodgates.

>>35378918
gotta show those kids who's the alpha. Shit son this is the smuggest thing i have ever read haha

>>35377936
This is the truth honestly it worked for me. I had a very similar situation with my first girlfriend was the first one to approach me and I took advantage of that as much as I could. My own confidence in continuing on with conversations and being up front and not timid like I usually am got me a long way.

>>35377705
The thing about sex is this:
It's a two people thing.

They're not letting you have sex with them. You're both having sex, together.

>>35377705
>How do normal people get girlfriends? Do they ask a girl out?
usually they just meet girls through friends. other than that out on the bar, clubs tinder etc... and yes the do. it usually goes something like: hey do you wanna go out?
its not usually like official or not official its more like a spectrum. all the normies that i know are like "yeah im with his girl but were kinda fucking kinda being a couple" you get the idea

>Are you allowed to touch your girlfriend's private areas whenever you want? yes. it depends on her sex drive tho. some girls are always down to be touched, some will just say not now.
>Like can just grab her boobs or feel her butt in private? yes girls like getting their butts grabbed just dont overdo it.
>Can you walk around naked near your girlfriend? Will she walk around naked near you?
yes but its generally not a good idea as your genitals start loosing their taboo and impact and you start getting bored with your girlfriends body.

>I honestly just can't imagine it at all. It doesn't make any sense to me. I don't think any girl would ever be anything other than revolted at me and disgusted that I'm even alive and in their presence. its mostly because you think about yourself that way. if you acted like somebody who fucks girls all the time they would be into you. not the stacys tho only ugly girls.
>It's amazing to think that some people have girlfriends and those girlfriends let them have sex with them, touch them, walk around naked near them, etc.
i know that feel senpai but once you turn normie it beomes second nature pretty quick.

>>35380948

I'm not an expert (had only a temporary 1 month fixed relationship at the age of 27), but from what I've seen, there's not much time.
Especially when you both work jobs. I moved in with her and had nothing to do, yet still she would come home tired and we couldn't even cuddle. The only time we had together was on he weekend. She had to do work stuff at home and sometimes she even wanted "alone time", which made me sad.
I assume you can fuck every chance you get at first, but then it becomes boring (not for me though, because I liked her so much).

>>35384271
go talk to her
She obviously isn't interested in the other guy otherwise they would already be dating

>>35382553

Kill yourself and your r9k and internet memes you pass off as real-world cases and truths.

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My main question is where do people meet girls?
I've described my situation before as "ugly duckling syndrome". I was fat, ugly, and retarded until I was about 16-17, lost 60 pounds, and puberty hit me like a brick. Now I'm decently attractive, thin, and I'm even called attractive directly quite a lot, even though I've still got the brain of a fat ugly fuck.
Since high school I've had a few girlfriends, all of which I've met through work, as well as one on tinder thanks to r9k. I've also managed to mature my superiority complex sperg humor into something relatively close to charm or wit.
I know I'm at least a 7/10 on my best days, and operate within a window of attractiveness that at least a handful of girls find appealing, but I have no idea how to actually meet them. What hobbies I do have are solitary, and I don't even like to go out to bars or clubs for obvious reasons.
I also now work at a museum, so all of my co-workers are old retired dudes, not a one female even within 30 years of me.
All of my friends are the same spergs I've known since I was a fat pizza-faced autist, so it's not like they could even introduce me to anyone.
So where do I even go to meet girls? A strategy I've been considering for a while is listing places where qt 20-something girls would be working, in which a friendly conversation would be natural, and it wouldn't take much effort to progress into asking for a number or a coffee date.
Are there places you guys have seen cuties working or hanging out? I've tried coffee shops, but they're usually reading or studying, or on a date with a guy leagues above my level. Even then, remember what Tom Waits said.

>>35385707

Internet dating websites and applications. Hang out with your friends in public and a conversation might strike up with a woman.

I met my GF at a little party i threw last year from a mutual friend.
Made out with the friend all night then my current gf messaged me on facebook to hook up.
My advice would to be to find a decent sized friend group and meet their lady friends.
I'm 7/10 but i'm dating a smoking hot 18 year old now. And I used to be like OP until i met this lady.
Don't use a dating site unless you are looking for tumblrette land whales.

>Never kissed a girl
>Never had sex
>Only ever had 1 "friendship" with a girl
>Physics major in college
>6'1''
>Athletic, lift weights regularly, played sports in highschool
>Slightly above average face
>5.5/10 face, 8/10 body
>Musician (Been playing sax since middle school)
>Whenever I try to get a girl to go on a date with me they give me excuses like "I have to do something for this class, anon" or "I'm busy then, anon"

It fucking hurts so much why don't girls like me fuck I hate being me, why am I so repulsive to every girl I find attractive, why do I see skinny 5'9 guys with cute girlfriends and I've never even gotten a girl to think twice about me

>>35386271

I don' even know you, but from your post it sounds like you're very vain, narcissistic and desperate for affection.

>>35386308
I might be, I'm so fucking lonely and when I see girls with guys that I think I'm superior to it shatters my worldview and makes me feel like there's something wrong with me on a deeper level.

>>35377936
>She asked me if the coat she was trying on looked good and I said something like "can I think about it and call you back later?" she wrote her number on my palm
I work on the till at a clothes store and I could never imagine myself doing this, it would be so remarkably out of character. I'd be worried about rejection in a normal setting, but in a place where I have to stay for the rest of the day. Not to mention she could complain or something possibly?

>>35386084
Kill yourseIf, normalfag. tbo

>>35386084
Fuck off fucking chad faggot

>>35377705
Damn look at that redhead's pale pink asshole

>>35377936
proof of my theory that no one is real and everyone is a fake piece of shit. i'm remaining as myself, even if it takes me years to get a gf.

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>>35378144
I've never had a girlfriend, I'm skinny as a skelly and have visible holes in my teeth. I've been staying in my room as much as possible to the point were I wouldn't go to the kitchen for food nor the bathroom to brush. Plus you don't shit or piss as much when you're not eating. This is the life of an average robot. There are others who are worse than me.

You are not a robot. Not in the slightest. If you think you are then you're no different than instawhores who post bullshit about being depressed while taking cutesy selfies and not responding to the hundreds of comments of concern for her depression just taking them all in. All that attention and faux sympathy. Plastic. Like the carcinogenic particles in her mascara and the keyboard you type upon.

>pic related; you = teasing women robots = Diogenes

>>35386605
>>35386727
Feels good knowing I won't die a virgin

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>>35387534
Different social interactions require that you play different roles. Am I ''fake'' because I don't call my mother a faggot when I address her like I do habitually on 4chan?

>>35387719
No that's called being polite despite your sense of humor

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>>35377936
>My last girlfriend kinda just walked up to me during lunch at work and we just talked.
>he asked me if the coat she was trying on looked good and I said something like "can I think about it and call you back later?" she wrote her number on my palm
fuck you chad

>>35388037
>fuck you chad
No thanks, I got my own girls for that

>>35386377
Same my dude, I'm kinda in the same boat.

Musician, decently attractive, lift weights, do yoga, above average face, also a physics major, but I've never really found a girl I've clicked with. Not sure why I keep attracting thots that I can't even get it up for if I wanted to but I just want someone real who I can say "I love you" to.

>>35386605
>>35386727

If you want the pussy you gotta stop being a fucking loser.
Take a break from the Chan and meet people. Sad that it has to be explained to you autists.
If you act like a decent god damn human being you will attract girls.

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>23
>never had a girlfriend
>never had sex without paying for it
>all these normies in here talking and spewing shit how the girl just walked up to them and they become a couple

>>35388102
what uni you go to? We could hang out

>>35388254
Get the fuck off this board, normo.

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Any experienced chads here have advice for asking out this girl I sorta know

I have her on facebook but I also know when she works and where. Not because I've been stalking her, she just happens to work at the same theatre I go to at the same day I usually go. I feel like asking her out for a cup of coffee on facebook would be wierd but I can't just walk up to her while she's working either

Its a lot of luck, just happening to meet the right person at the right time. Its one of those things that just kind of happens for most people at some point. Not ever having a gf is just a mix of bad luck and bad decisions, most likely poor choices is the biggest reason. Then there are the few that make mostly good choices and get shit on by life.

>>35382553
>if you touch the girl who only hangs out with you because she wants you to touch her, you will go to jail!

lmfaoooo

>>35388621
Stalk her a bit (without the bitch knowing, of course), either online or irl, to get a grasp on her schedule. Then you accidentally bump into her in random occasions (her leaving work, for example), chat up, set up a date and proceed from there. Or befriend her social circle.

>>35379173
>that's like asking an Asian how to fail a test
They get caught cheating

>>35378075
>"how does Chad do it?"
>Chad answers
>"fuck off Chad!"

>>35388621
>but I can't just walk up to her while she's working

This is literally your only option.

What do you think is going to happen here? You're never going to speak to her or interact with her in any way, and somehow she'll magically jump on your dick?

>>35381471
it's a left/right thing
the more traditional the society, the less approaching by women

>>35388098
>Chad wins again
Why won't you normies leave us to our misery

>>35382624
>>35377705

How tall are you OP? I'm 5'3" and can relate to everything you're saying. I don't hate women or anything it just feels like I've been completely ignored by them my whole life. Never had any female friends either.

>>35390767
I'm 5'3'' too. Don't worry, you are fine. I am skeltal too so fuckin just believe me.

>>35377705
I'll reply based on my experience (inb4 normies reeeee)

How do normal people get girlfriends?
I don't really make the first move, usually a girl will show she's into me at university or something. I mean she'd just talk to me or something, it could easily go to us being friends.

Do they ask a girl out?
If I like them too then I'd probably ask them if they want to go for dinner or something, yeah. Or we'd get drunk together with friends around and slowly get more and more familiar.

What words do they use? "Want to go on a date"?
No, I'd never actually say 'date' since it makes it seem so forced and formal. Just be like "hey you fancy going to this new italian restaurant that just opened? They make great pizza" or something.

How do you know if you're officially girlfriend and boyfriend?
Who cares? It's not anyone elses business, this isn't high school. I guess there's a certain moment when things become exclusive, and that's probably the threshold you mean, but the way that arrives is always different.

Are you allowed to touch your girlfriend's private areas whenever you want?
No, she's not a sex robot, so don't treat her like one. However in certain situations you could get intimate with her - say you're watching a movie together at home, you might have your arm round her, no reason you couldnt stroke her thighs or something and see how she reacts.

Like can just grab her boobs or feel her butt in private?
I grab her butt a lot when she comes over to me whe I'm sitting at my desk, since she's stood up i hug her and my face is in her chest and my arms round her butt. It's pretty nice. But I wouldn't grab her sexually unless I wanted to get sexual with her, otherwise it is pretty annoying for her.

Can you walk around naked near your girlfriend? Will she walk around naked near you?
I sleep naked with her and would have no issues walking about naked. I wouldn't make a habit of it though, I guess only if I'm showering or we had sex or something.

>>35390767
>it's impossible for short men to breed, which is why they've been bred out of existence!

Manlets are literally subhuman. Suicide yourself immediately.

>>35380833
I am 5'10" tall, so not short, but nor am I tall of course. I am just average.

I know that girls do massively prefer tall guys, which I don't understand. All the pretty girls around I see with guys who are 6'2" or so.

>>35387560
why should i trust anything a guy who doesn't perform basic dental hygiene says?

>>35381203
That's actually a fairly good run down.

Whenever I talk to a girl, which is perhaps once a year, they always look uncomfortable and mildly angry at me. There is certainly no sign whatsoever that they are attracted to me, quite the opposite, they make it as clear as possible that they do not see me as a sexual being.

>>35378075
Someone's lonely lmao

>>35377705
You're 12, you'll figure it out eventually

I have Crohn's.

No girl will ever want to be with someone like me. I cannot travel to places too far from my home. I don't work that much due to it. Who wants that?

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>>35377705
It's probably because you're an aspie who's impossible to be around for more than 2 seconds. Just accept your fate of being a turbo virgin for the rest of your life

>>35378917
Enjoy living like you are now for the rest of your life because if you cant even see the sense in what that anon said here you will never make it

>>35390110
she doesn't have a social circle, as far as I know. I mean for her spare at school she sat alone in a room on her laptop.

>>35390357
I know but I'm terribly afraid of sperging out and fucking it up in public. Asking her on facebook seems like such a shit thing to do but it'd be so much easier

>>35392039
Stop being such a fag and just ask if you want to. If you're not totally unbearable, she may give you a chance. If you're a pussy, you can sit by and watch as she's picked up by some well adjusted guy, who you can later call a normie Chad on r9k. The choice is yours

>>35391945
You're just a liability. Nobody wants that.

>>35377705
Honestly looking at real vaginas is kinda of gross

>>35391442
HE IS THE ROYAL

KING

OF

MANLETS

>>35392154
Ass hole is prettier.

What worked for me is pretend she isn't a player and fucking like 6 other dudes. Don't be yourself, your pretty much an entertainment/performance monkey. An actual ape in a clown suit in some zoo show to get them to laugh. She probably won't want to eat anything you want to eat, doesn't want to do any of the stuff you want to do. Don't bother trying to introduce her to your friends because they'll want to fuck her, probably even if they got their own gf and they'll probably get kind of rapey about it and try to get her drunk or drugged up so she won't say no. Also a lot of other guys who don't really have more money than you will spend what money they have to try and bang her so make sure your clown make up isn't too smudged and don't forget to shine those clown shoes.

>>35392039

Just walk up and talk to her, idiot. If you can't even do that, what hope do you have for forming and maintaining a real relationship?

You realize that having a gf is work, right? Like, actual fucking work? It's not something you just magically obtain and then have forever. You actually have to give a shit and try to do things that are outside of your comfort zone.

If you only do the easy thing, what separates you from the millions of other thirsty dudes you're competing with? As it stands, all it takes for another dude to defeat you is for them to walk up to her and say "Hello.", because you won't even do that much.

>>35380218

Woman have value by default, men have to earn it unless they are gentically gifted, creating a situation where the average woman has power over the average man.

>>35392356
>Woman have value by default

Damn dude, you must be lonely as fuck to actually believe this.

Have you ever seen the average woman? Do you honestly believe that they have value "by default"?.

>>35381945
>its all just about being attractive to them, if they think youre "cute" and "like you" you can literally do whatever

This. Its cool when guys use strategies and even a bit of acting like has been suggested, but the flaw there is that the girl doesn't always stick once the illusion is broken.

Maybe I'm wrong but I feel like the girl that is best for you is the girl you could intentionally try to turn off and she would still be on your dick.

>>35392397
>Do you honestly believe that they have value "by default"?.

Yes. When most men are looking for a mate they only consider her looks and maybe her sanity, we don't judge woman by their job, car, how many friends they have, how confident they are, how funny they are, their hobbies, etc.

As long as a woman is not exceptionally ugly or fat, she will grow into a suitable mate for a man because men simply need a companion and the womb of a young fertile woman to incubate a child, whereas a woman needs resources and protection from a socially competent male, which is a lot harder to obtain.

Lets say a 4/10 posted a thread right now asking for a bf, time stamp and everything, she would get plenty of offers on the spot, the thread might even hit the post limit, if a guy does the same thing you'll get nothing but a few post laughing at your desperation and maybe a tranny offering xer boipussy.

You know this to be true.

>>35392781
>Yes.

So a 45 year old single mother with herpes is more valuable than you?

You must have the self-esteem of an amoeba, and the awareness of a koala.

>>35381843
Yup
Those gf and friend rules are still enforced there last time i checked

>>35392808
>So a 45 year old single mother with herpes is more valuable than you?

Me? Yes.

You're just proving my point btw, your example had to be a woman way past her prime with an incurable disease just to level the playing field.

When comparing the average girl with the average guy the girl will always have more value.

Guys do have more potential value than girls because of the rockstar/CEO factor, but those guys are 1 in a million. Girls don't really gain much leverage through accumulating wealth, someone like donald trump could even be considered a sex symbol for some woman, but you'll never hear guys talking about how badly they want to fuck oprah, even though shes a very powerful and wealthy woman, shes just not physically attractive enough.

>>35392216
I'm aware anon, that's partially why I haven't asked her yet because I probably don't deserve to have a relationship anyway

>>35392100
Nigga do you have any idea how bad the anxiety is even thinking about it when you haven't ever asked a girl out?

I feel so fucking weak and shit

>>35392808
you are delusional.

A women would fuck a cute dog or horse over an average faced man ANY day of the week. It's not even close. Women are repulsed by non male model men.

Ask yourself this, why do you think there are so many single women and so many single men? all those women are a part of some chads harem. She gets pumped and dumped and chad moves on to the next slut. Roughly 80% of young men are rarely getting laid/celibate due to the females being extremely hypergamous and naturally inclined towards being a part of chads harem

>>35393078

Amoeba and koala.

>>35393124
>>35393078
>so wrong he had to reply twice

Just get the fuck out of my thread already.

>>35377705
Mine asked me out. We'd been friends before that. We were "official" after the asking out. IDK if I'm allowed to grab whatever I want, but that's what I do. She'll call me a molester or whatever but she doesn't really care. Walking around naked isn't a problem, but desu famicom that kind of spoils the excitement when you're naked for a reason.

>>35393121
>when you haven't ever asked a girl out?

Easy solution: ask one out.

What's the worst thing that could happen? She'll say no?

Ask yourself which is the crueler fate: Having one (1) woman, of billions, tell you "No" or sitting in your room and never ever trying at all, and then dying alone without a struggle?

>>35393158
solid b8, almost hooked meh

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>>35393192
>immediately replied with angry temper tantrum bullshit
>"haha you ALMOST baited me"

>>35377705

you can ask but nobody can really tell you the answers, aside from maybe how to get started.

the rest of that stuff all has to be learned firsthand.

>>35377936
Fuck you normie just turn your pc off faggot

>>35377705
I know I'm late as fuck to this thread but i'll give some insight too

i'm somewhat normie, and i've been in 30+ relationships/flings , some serious and some not so serious
>inb4 chad gtfo
but in reality i'm not really a chad, perhaps you associate being with women 'being a chad', but trust me, in reality it isn't like that at all

now about me, i'm an alright looking hispanic guy in his early 20s
5"7, somewhat athletic, and i usually consider myself alright looking, but i'm nowhere near 'really attractive", just alright looking, maybe a bit above average

most of the girls i've dated have been normal looking girls, i'd say 7/10, i've dated one actual stacy who was like 9/10 tier and i've slept with a few girls so ugly you wouldn't even tell your friends about, including some 'non-binary' chick from a university class i had, but hey- down there the pussy is the same

now lets get to the OP's topic, how do you get a girlfriend?
step 1 is find a girl )
1) you either have to know girls through your social circle or friends of friends or through class or work or osmething, or tinder/dating apps
tinder is a lot harder because of the sheer amount of competition, make a fake facebook girl account and look at the guys in your area, and the look at the girls on tinder in the area, you'll see what i mean

but yes, find a girl

2) be attractive. as >>35377936

said, you need to be 'a movie star version of yourself' and in other words it just means be someone she would like to be with

if you were a girl, would you rather date the baseball team captain or some fat shut in who plays overwatch and masturbates to anime all day?
trust me when i say this, but most guys have potential to attract girls, you guys just do it wrong
@op for example, that last part of your message is a major turn off to ALL girls, NEVER show insecurities (even if you have them)
saying "no girl will ever like me:(" is literally going to keep you there

>>35393184
I know it's what I should do nigga, but that doesn't make me any more confident in my ability to do it.

I used to be homeschooled and I only did 2 years of public school so it's a miracle I can even talk to someone semi normally let alone ask a girl out

>>35393249
>i've been in 30+ relationships/flings
Damn dude, you suck at dating

>>35393251
>but that doesn't make me any more confident in my ability to do it.

Then improve yourself so that you are more confident.

Duh.

>>35393271

That's literally just a description of ANYONE who has attended college for four years.

If you spent 4 years in school and didn't slay 30 pussies, you're some sort of autistic loser.

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>>35393158

Are you serious? This isn't even red pill level stuff, just mating 101.

This goes back to the cave man days of men going out and chucking spears at tigers while woman stay back to nurse kids and make baskets and shit, the difference being that the male role requires risk and a standard to live up to (acquiring resources) and the female grows into her role naturally with little to no chance of fucking it up, the worse a female could do is pick an incompetent male as a mate.

>>35393249
field too long, but alright
continued

yes, work on yourself and get better
as that one guy said, lets say you're into underground indie music or are an artist, or you play an instrument, or you're into obscure /fa/ fashion, or you love motorcycles or cars, you play squash or soccer in a recreational league, it can be ANYTHING, but you have to

F R A M E I T

as in the sense that you gotta project something

i'll give you a secret

women aren't in love with you, they're in love with the idea of 'you'
in the sense that they have a certain perception of you, as do all people
your image matters a lot
>but what happened to true love? won't a girl like me for who i am?
man, sorry to break it to you but it takes a long long time before it even gets to that point

back to actually getting a date or anything, lets see
3)actually talk to her
there is some weird phenomena where these beta guys assuem that they can just ask a girl out and she'll magically say yes just because you really want to
it isn't that easy
so for this , we'll assume she's attracted to you from step 2

talk. to. her.
it can be someone you approach, it can be a girl in your social circle or club
just literally say hey
work on your conversation, work on your small talk, work on being able to lead an interesting conversation , work on being charismatic

fake it if you can't
you have no IDEA how easy it is to fake it

girls see this as 'confident'
and its where the 'beeeee yourself' meme comes from

girls are attracted to guys who are charasmatic and confident, so they tell you to 'be yourself' in the sense that you should b like the guys who do that

so just talk to her, build the attraction
escalate the situation
be flirty
touch her , even if its just like grabbing her shoulder or something
i personally have the best luck at parties or at social gatherings and particularly when drinking since that liquid confidence hits and i just stop giving a fuck

>>35377705
My exgf still comes over every day to suck me off and occasionally fuck, if she's feeling up to it after last time.
I dont even have a big dick.
I just tell her stupid ass what to do and she listens faithfully, even while she's trying to start a relationship with another dude.

>>35380111
pls don't be me from the future

>>35393346
>mating 101

"all women want to have sex with dogs"?

Lol

I genuinely feel sad for people like you. You've been taken in by the memes so hard that you really, actually believe this shit.

>>35393078
I actually post a lot about fucking oprah
would totally bang rich females as long as they're a good fuck

>>35393324
>>35393271
>>35393358

thanks for the (You)'s , and i agree, believe it or not but yes, most girls and guys who are 'normie' date multiple people, (and when i say that i mean A L O T)
even if you haven't had a girlfriend, pretend to
just reference girls you've seen

for example, if we're talking about disneyland, i'll just drop about how 'oh there was this girl i was seeing and -insert some funny story that happened at disneyland-
or 'oh you like the strokes? this girl i used to fuck back in freshman year was super into it, she'd always sing the songs when we fucked' or whatever

also, normies use snapchat and instagram and all that stuff

personally i took up photography as as hobby, which is somewhat hipster and 'omg look at him he's a photographer, so artsy'
but it helps a lot with the instagram photos
believe it or not, people judge you when you say 'oh i don't have snapchat' or 'i don't use instagram or social media'
get some alright looking photos up of you or your friends and you doing cool shit, even if its something lame like hiking or at the beach

but yeah, to get into the relationship , you have to keep tlaking to her, if its at a party ask her to come over or to grab some food with you, or to go for coffee
if its someone you actually know , do the same , ask them out to grab lunch (nonchalantly ,don't make it like "OMG DATE ME") and you just keep seeing them
if you like to text or snapchat or anything, talk to them over there
start convos like 'heya whats up? how's your day going?', you can even be flirty too in texting and call her 'cutie etc'

and to finally answer OP's last question, yeah you can tease them and grab her ass or her tits or just be playful about it
you're usually never naked unless you're actually fucking or you live alone and you hvae the luxury of being able to be naked around if you don't live with family
just build up who you are
remember, that girls are just girls at the end,most girls are fucking sluts,

>>35393414

Hey man do you, shes just an example of how money and power will rarely make a woman more attractive if she isn't already, whereas you could take any ugly virgin here, attach his name to a wildly successful indie game and he'll have a harem in no time.

>>35393475

Stop being autistic.

This is your final warning.

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>tfw a girl will never marvel at the size of my cock

>>35393522
look in the mirror, i'm literally giving real fucking adivce

>>35393567

That's it, I'm calling the sperg police.

Expect to see a couple squad cars outside of your mother's basement in ten minutes. I warned you, anon. Now it's time to face the consequences!

>>35393301
what do you think I'm doing before I ask you out you bloody mong

>>35393626
>what do you think I'm doing

Then shut the fuck up and get to it.

How is complaining on /r9k/ a part of this?

>>35393644
I'm not complaining anon, I got pretty lucky actually

I'm just kicking myself for not doing this when it was so much easier

we were literally alone in the same room for half a year and I didn't even know her name

dumb

dumb

FUCKKKK

>>35393680

Well you seem a lot more self-aware than most of the losers on this board, so...godspeed, Anon.

Can we get a fucking sauce on this image? Who is this women?

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>>35377705
>work shitty retail job
>cute as fuck new girl appears out of nowhere
>only seen/ talked to her a handful of times
>super bubbly, laughs a lot when we talk
>do my best to "flirt" though I'm not sure if I'm doing it right
>she asks me when I'll be in for my next shift/ what shifts I have this week
>tells me her shifts and then says "maybe I'll see you!"

>I'm a 5'8" turbo-manlet who's only a little taller than her
>I have giant ugly bags under my eyes from insomnia
>I've been called "cute" by some women, not neccesarily a good thing

Is she into me or not? How the fuck do I approach this?

>>35393784
>taller than her

Forget about the memes. This is the only thing that women actually care about.

Yeah maybe you've seen a screenshot of a profile where a woman claimed to only date men over six feet. But in the real world, you have a girl who is talking to you. Which thing are you going to believe? The memes, or the real world where you actually live?

>How the fuck do I approach this?

Chill the fuck out.

Just talk to her like a normal person. You may not even like this girl in the long run.

>>35393718
thanks my man

(((thanks in original)))

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>>35377705
What do you even talk about to women you're interested in? I could talk to them about the Jewish conspiracies and redpill her but she'll probably leave and never come back.

>>35377705
>expect a gay butt thread
>it's not

fuck you, give me back the brain cycles you stole from me. i'm running behind schedule thanks to your antics, you ass

>>35377936
>"can I think about it and call you back later?"
Smooth af, saving that one

This guy gets it, though. If you play yourself up a bit, you can better blend in with normies and, if cards are played in proper order, you can attain a gf. Been livin' that life for a couple years now and my social life's only escalated since.