Google Maps Quest - Chapter 2 Continued

>>34950
give the dusit the fan blades and tell him to help

>>34950
>Let the Jew do most of the killing
Once they're both close to death, we can kill both of them with decent rolls.

>>34950

Ask Eric about the jew

>>35130
I don't think we have a very good chance against the Jew because of his blade, but we could try it out. If we don't stand a chance against the Jew, we could always seduce him.

>>35249
We won't have a chance against the Jew at full power, but we will if he gets low on health. We seem to always have first move priority, so if he drops to 9 health, it is guaranteed that we kill him in one hit.

>>35295
Sounds good. Backed.

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>>35049
The Dusit does not take the fan blades and continues to stare blankly into space, his mind completely fried by the overwhelming DANGER of this situation.

>>35337
We're going to have to fix his cock or else he's going to be fucking useless for this quest!

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The Jew signals to you.

"Goyim, I think I have a plan. But you'll first need to create a distraction for Eric. Oyyy, can you do that for me?"

Help the Jew?

Why didn't jew listen

>>35388
yes

>>35388
Yes.

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>>35397
>>35415
"Good goy! I just need you to keep him occupied for a few minutes; I'm going to take this SPEED PILL, it will allow me to rush him while he's focused on you and rip the Amulet of Bombast from his neck."

Well, looks like you've agreed to be the decoy.
What now, /qst/?

>>35388
Not like we have any decent plans of our own. Yes.

>>35476
Taunt Eric about how he's no Wizard, just a little runt that squirted out of his dad's ballsack

>>35476
>"Why don't you let me have a SPEED PILL? I can distract him easier if I can rush all over the place, all you need to do is hit him."

>>35535
Once Eric sees that we're a mere decoy he'll wipe us all out. Best that the JEW gets it over and done with.

>>35611
Fine, I agree for the sake of advancing the story.

>>35678
Actually, the SPEED PILL might be our one chance to kill the JEW after he kills Eric. Let's try to take the SPEED PILL.

>>35719
Alright, yeah. That's what I was getting at before.

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>>35719
>>35535
"WHY WOULD I LET YOU HAVE THE PILL WHEN YOU HAVE ALREADY BACKSTABBED ME MORE THAN ONCE"

Eric has been busy checking his phone.
He looks over at you guys.

"Can I kill you yet, or you still busy having your last conversation?"

Rolled 8 (1d10)

>>35806
ROLL FOR SEDUCTION

>>35839

Yeah let's go with that again

>>35839
[[Are you trying to seduce Eric or the Jew?]]

>>35476
>tell Eric he is low energy

>>35839
Right on!

>>35852
the Jew?

>>35852
BOTH!

>>35896
I like this poster's thinking.

>>35896
Alright, what's your preferred method of seduction?

Do you:

>flirt
>strip
>pelvic thrust the air

>>35915
>Flirt, then strip, slowly.

>>35915
Flirt

>>35929
Right, no sperging with the pelvic thrusts, lads.

>>35915
Flirt

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>>36023
>>35930
>>35929
In the middle of this tense situation, this situation that is just teetering on the edge of violence, you attempt to shift the mood in a... different direction.

You walk over to Eric. Your instincts have fully taken over at this point. You greet him with a simple "hey".

Eric assumes a battle stance. "Finally ready for open combat? I'm going to take pleasure in killing you and this pesky Jew."

You ask him why.

"What?" Eric queries.

You tell Eric that there might be another way for you to pleasure him that doesn't involve eviscerating you with dark magic.

"Wh-what do you mean?" Eric seems very taken aback by this.

"Is this a joke? I'm going to kill you, pathetic mortal!"

Eric's aura is inflamed by your come-on. Roll another 1d10 to continue flirting.

Rolled 6 (1d10)

>>36115
"Relax."

>>36126
Backed.

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>>36115
"STOP."

You attempted to touch Eric's shoulder when telling him to relax. That was a mistake.

Your hand is burned by Eric's impressive darkmagic aura. You lose 4 health.

Eric is in a RAGE now. Your flirting was ineffective this time. Oh, young Rand, you've learned an important lesson about not being able to whore your body in every situation.

Out of the corner of your eye, you notice the Jew down the speed pill. It shouldn't be long now before he makes his move. Eric Trump looms over you, ready to tear you apart. You are closer now to death than perhaps you have ever been.

What do you do?

Rolled 9 (1d10)

>>36264
ROLL FOR FLIRT AGAIN! ALL WE NEED TO DO IS DISTRACT AT THIS POINT!

>>36264
>>36284
KEEP THE FLIRT GOING

>>36284
I'm with pink Anon, our sweet curly locks are all we've got.

>"What's the matter, sweetie?"

>>36284
It's much too late to stop now.

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>>36284
You decide to keep flirting, throwing literally all caution to the wind.

However, your good roll means that this time, you actually kind of succeed. In a way.

You see, Eric Trump knew you two were probably going to attempt to distract him. That he figured. But he didn't anticipate that you would attempt, of all things, to flirt with him. He clearly did not hear about your success with the Jew.

And he also didn't anticipate that this Jew would have a natural speed stat much higher than his.

You just went for it and grabbed Eric's cock. Meanwhile, sensing an opening, the Jew rushed over moving at incredibly high speeds to steal the Amulet from his neck. Master play.

The JEW now has the AMULET OF BOMBAST! Now's your chance!

>>36478
USE THE WAND

Rolled 7 (1d10)

>>36478
"Eric...I love you. That's why you need to help me kill the Jew right now."

>>36478
Give him the Rod of Silence

>>36478
TWIST HIS DICK OFF AND >>36490

dice+1d10

Rolled 7 (1d10)

>>36517
shit i'm dumb as fuck

>>36548
We're supposed to bring him back to Trump, who'd be angry if his son's dick was torn off

>>36580
Right, that's why we should convince Eric to kill the kike. The Jew's going to have a grudge against us.

>>36580
If we're supposed to bring him back to Trump, turning him to our side and killing the Jew is a good way of doing that. Everyone knows the way to a man's heart is his dick.

Rolled 7 (1d10)

>>36478

use WAND

>>36580
Damn, you're right. We should still Use the Wand though, Eric wouldn't want to double team the Jew unless we make him an invalid

>>36598
>>36600
[[The flirting managed to distract him. You didn't seduce Eric, but you threw him off to the point where it was possible for the Jew to grab his amulet.

Also you guys are crazy if you think Eric's just going to team up with you after you attempted to neuter him like that.]]

>>36708
We didn't try to neuter him!

Rolled 8 (1d10)

>>36708
>(Roll for convince) "I'm not with him, baby! All I'm here for is to bring you back to your dad! Kill him for me."

>>36749
This ought to count for something! This is like getting quads OP

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>>36490
As soon as the Jew tears the Amulter of Bombast from Eric Trump's neck, you take out your WAND OF SEALING and point it at Eric Trump! A great beam flies out of the wand's jeweltip and towards Eric, hitting him square in the chest.

HOWEVER!

Prolonged exposure to the Amulet of Bombast has caused Eric to become partially immune to the effects of the Wand of Sealing! It only worked at HALF-EFFECTIVENESS.

Eric's magic buff of 200HP has been cut to 100HP.
Eric's magic attack strength has been cut in half.
Eric's magic defense strength has been cut in half.

ERIC LOOKS REALLY FUCKING PISSED
You attempt to reason with him in order to possibly backstab the Jew, but he ignores your persuasion and attacks!

The Jew stands prepared for battle!
The Dusit is still paralyzed!

You're in a fight- what do you do?

>>36876
[[Battle theme: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AFNnlFw29q4]]

Rolled 5 (1d10)

>>36876
Guess we've got no choice, we have to help the jew now.
>Attack

>>36876
Pray to Jesus, our lord and savior, for a miracle.

>>36957
We need to autoSAGE these PRAY commands. Please ignore them QM.

>>36968
>I don't like thing so nobody can do thing

Also,
>implying praying to Jesus is the same as praying to Yahweh

>>36993
It is clearly irrelevant to the quest. I would be in favor of praying if the QM made it clear that praying matters. Besides, we're wearing a Jewhat. I don't think Jesus would appreciate us wearing a hat of the people who crucified Him.

>>37022
>Take off KIPPAH

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>>37034
>>36993
All right lads, here goes!

Rolled 9 (1d10)

>>36876
i grab the jew and fling him in front of eric to fight him properly. or maybe not, it seems like they have a history. either way, rolling.

>>37022
Nothing is ever irrelevant to a quest.
Praying is what most people do when faced with mortal terror such as a mad Erick Trump with magic powers. The fact that were doing it so much is just a common thing, we're also no longer asking to become Jewish.

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>>36911
You stab Eric with your pitchfork for 11 damage!

ERIC IS IN A RAGE
He swipes at you with his long, black wizard claws- you take 15 damage!

The Jew mounts an incredible offensive, charging up to Eric and cleaving his neck with the JEWBLADE! You're semi-amazed to watch the Jewblade being used in action. ERIC TAKES A WHOPPING 111 DAMAGE!

The Dusit seems close to fainting!

What do you do?!

>>37111
>111 damage
>111 trips
FUCK

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>>37111
Check those sweet trips.

>>37111
the jew can outspeed eric. if we could get him to run toward trumps place, eric will follow and be led right into trumps hands. boom, we beat the quest.

can we fast-travel mid-combat or do we need to find out another way to do it?

>>36876
Begin lecturing about the inefficiencies of government control over personal liberties and explain why no man has moral authority to intervene in another man's life unless they are preventing harm.

SPEECH ATTEMPT

Rolled 10 (1d10)

>>37111
>Dubs and trips
>Also, ATTACK again

>>37161
(cuz maybe we could steal the sword and then fast-travel, forcing the jew to give chase, and eric to give chase to the jew. idc about the dusit.)

>>37111
>Aim for the BLACK WIZARD CLAWS with PITCHFORK.
>REMIND the DUSIT that his DUSITCOCK may be repaired with MAGIC.

>>37160
Our character is Rand Paul, you meme.

I vote for >>37163 , my previous suggestion.

>>37164
oshit

>>37161
[[The Jew is out to kill Eric, and will not assist in producing any other outcomes.]]

>>37180
I know m8, that's the goddamn joke. a libertarian like Rand Paul supporting a Totalitarian, Collectivist ideology.

I erased it because the roll was shit though.

For the record, you guys really should go with the option that got a 10 ahem >>37164

Rolled 9 (1d10)

Flash your Rand Paul's Bland Balls at Eric, blinding him

>>37211
this

>>37211
Pretty much this, keep attacking.

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>>37164
>>37211
You keep up the pressure, going in for another stab with your pitchfork and dealing a CRITICAL 34 damage to Eric! How's that for American Gothic?

Eric is in panic mode! He hurls flames from his magical aura, which hit each active party member! You take 16 damage, while the Jew takes 13.

The Jew is not deterred! He heaves the Jewblade over his head and pounces towards Eric's head, whacking his skull and dealing 122 damage!

Eric is losing this battle- he's near death, and getting desperate! You're not in great shakes yourself, by the way. What do you do?

Rolled 1 (1d10)

>>37336
>AGAIN with the PITCHFORK

>>37336
Hide behind the Dusit, use it as a shield while the jew keeps attacking Eric.

>>37369
This.
>>37368
Not this.

Rolled 8 (1d10)

>>37336
Throw the dusit penis at Eric, hoping that it will distract him for long enough to allow the Jew to strike him down.

Then when he is dying on the floor tell him he is fired.

>>37378
The DUSIT has the DUSITCOCK. We no longer have it. Also, we are not trying to kill Eric. We need to bring him back to his father for the quest.

>>37402
Eric is going to die. This is the Jew's intention. If anything, we should attack the Jew.

>>37402
Take the Dusitcock from the Dusit, then throw it.

We don't care about Trump, we want Eric to pay with his blood after insulting us.

>>37409
Then we better get the Jew quick! Let's throw some SHEKELS to distract him!

>>37409
>>37402
[[Looks like you guys have a decision to make. It's pretty important and will affect the trajectory of the rest of this quest.]]

>>37420
throw all of our cash on the ground to distract the jew
wait for Eric to strike the jew down and use the wand on Eric again

>>37423
>THROW SHEKELS to SNEAK ATTACK the JEW

>>37423
I reeeeeally want that reward from Trump...but at the same time, Eric is gonna kill us if we don't kill him...fuck.
I CALL ON THE POWER OF DUBS TO HELP ME NOW! HEAL ME, MIGHTY DUBS!

>>37436
Seconded. Throw shekels to distract Jew and tell Eric that we can resolve this peacefully with his father if he kills the Jew for you

Rolled 10 (1d10)

>>37423
KILL THE JEW, ERIC WILL COME BACK WITH YOU OUT OF GRATITUDE

we don't want to make such a dangerous enemy so early. i'm talking about trump, of course.

hoping the shock is enough to keep us alive for one more turn. why the fuck is eric attacking us anyway, instead of the bigger threat??

>>37423
The only way out alive is to kill Eric, we'll have to align ourselves with the jew for now.
>>37435
The wand is single-use.

>>37450
Fuck. Worth a shot.
Anyways, I back >>37436 >>37457 >>37454

>>37457
eyyy fuck yes

adding the shekels idea to my roll

Vote now:

> Help the Jew finish Eric off
> Betray the Jew yet again, oy vey, anudda shoah etc

First to 3 wins

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>SHEKEL

>>37490
>BETRAY JEW

>>37490
BETRAY JEW

>>37490
> Finish Eric off

>>37490
> Help the Jew finish Eric off

>>37490
Stab the Jew in the back like they stabbed Germany in the back during WW1.

>>37495
Consider this
>JEW BETRAYAL

>>37500
Also, for the record, we most likely won't finish Eric off, we won't be strong enough to finish him off in the next hit, so the Jew will get the exp.

>>37490
Here's the thing, the jew is going to kill us after this is done, so we need to BETRAY the jew.
If things continue to go south we can always run, sacrifices the DUSIT or take on the weakened eric ourselves.

>>37516
[[In such a situation the exp would be divided evenly between anyone who has landed a hit]]

>>37531
Evenly? Oy vey, that's a tough one...I'm gonna have to switch to
>Finish Eric off

SHEKEL THE JEW
SHEKEL HIM NOW

>>37546
I stand by my shekel idea. Toss the shekels and strike down the kike.

ATTACK ERIC WITH THE JEW
MAKE THE DUSIT SCARE THE JEW AWAY WITH HIS UNCUT DUSITCOCK

>>37561
>"uncut"

This quest is amazing OP and so are you

Kill Eric. Give Jew sheckles as apology.

>>37570
uncircumcised DUSITCOCK

>>37587
I know, it's a joke man.

Don't any of you remember how powerful the WIZARD was? I don't think he'll be happy if we kill his son.

>>37587
We kinda circumcised it...

>>37595
I know ;)

>>37579
Wait. Instead throw sheckles at Eric.

Rolled 3 (1d10)

Throw shekels in front of Jew for a distraction, then kill him with the pitchfork.

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Alright, so you guys have decided to betray the Jew yet again. How do you go about doing this? One of you will need to roll to see how effective your shekel distraction is. That's the easy roll- get a 3 or above and your shekel tossing will work.

Someone else needs to roll to see if persuading Eric to turn on the Jew works. For that one:

1-3 Eric continues attacking you.
4-5 Eric is simply distracted by the shekel throwing, giving you one more turn without taking damage
6-10 Eric accepts your proposal and turns on the Jew.

Rolled 7 (1d10)

>>37638
>>37635
Well, that shekel throwing one was easy. Roll for persuasion.

>>37634
Why would Eric care about shekels when his dad is very rich, so unbelievably rich, so rich that it'll make your head turn?

>>37647
It would've forced the Jew to run over, allowing you to make your escape.

>>37638
>SHEKELS

Rolled 7 (1d10)

>>37671
oops, I always put "roll+1d10" in options

Rolling for the SHEKELS

>>37644
[[Wow, what a lucky, stupid boy Rand is. I was expecting that to go sour.]]

>>37683
I've barely rolled a bad roll so far, the worst one I had only made us take 4 damage and all of our flirts and seductions working okay was because of me. I officially declare myself master of luck.

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>>37700
[[Dubs confirms it]]

>>37700
Not bad, yeah, I've noticed. Nice dubs by the way. We got 7 on both the shekels and convincing Eric. We should be good to go!

>>37700
truly you are gifted

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>>37682
>>37644
Seizing an opportunity to carry out your quest as intended, you launch the two shekels from your inventory into the rubble in an attempt to distract the Jew.

This is a resounding success of course, as no Jew can resist following the glint of shiny currency. The Jew drops to the ground immediately in search of the shekels.

In a completely voiceless exchange, Eric is cogent enough to be roused from his enraged state and understand your intentions. He grins and nods, and begins charging up an attack.

I assume you would like to attack the Jew as well- unless I'm mistaken, roll a d10.

That Dusit isn't feeling any better, by the way. What a day it's been for him.

STAB IN BACK

Time to roll a 1

>>37845
[[Nice ID]]

Rolled 1 (1d10)

>>37837
Attack jew with the pitchfork.

Rolled 3 (1d10)

>>37837
MASTER OF LUCK IN THE HOUSE

Rolled 4 (1d10)

>>37837
Attack the jew

Rolled 2 (1d10)

>>37845
Forgot roll

Rolled 9 (1d10)

>>37854
>>37856
Kek, stand back and check this.

All of these rolls suck ass

>>37845
>>37854
>>37856
>>37859
>>37861
I've made a huge mistake.
>>37868
SAVIOR

Rolled 2 (1d10)

>>37854
>>37856
>>37859
>>37861

welp

rolling to remove their bad rolls and fork the jew

>>37854
>>37856
>>37859
>>37861
[[Fantastic rolls, you guys.]]

Rolled 9 (1d10)

Rape attack the Jew.

>>37854
>>37856
>>37859
>>37861
WE ALL FUCKED UP

>>37875
DO THIS DO THIS
RAPE HIM

>>37874
Why don't you roll then, Mr. QM? Let's see how you do.

Rolled 5 (1d10)

>>37875
steal back the dusit's dick and stick it up the jew's nose

>>37868
>>37875
COMBINE for REVENGE against JEWRAPE

Rolled 1 (1d10)

>>37890
[[I'm going with the first roll but do not doubt my powers.]]

>>37903
>Do not doubt my powers
>rolls a 1

>>37903
DOUBT

>>37903
gud job

>>37903
:^)

Rolled 2 (1d10)

>>37903
kek
Here have this actually decent roll

>>37903
>>37913
tippity-toppity kek, bow to your new luckmaster

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>>37913
>>37914
>>37915

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Rolled 1, 1, 1, 1, 1, 1, 1, 1, 1, 1 = 10 (10d1)

[[Ch-check out this sweet roll you guys,]]

Rolled 3, 1 = 4 (2d5)

>>37975
no check this

Rolled 4, 1, 1 = 6 (3d7)

>>37975
You've only given yourself the facade of a good roll, for you have simultaneously rolled both the best AND the worst possible outcome on each dice. Also, check this.

>>37975
Ah, now we know where Eric gets his powers! He cheats!

Rolled 12 (1d20)

I know the quest is derailing slightly, but what is it with this thread and bad rolls?

Rolled 2, 1 = 3 (2d6)

>>38020
Chill HOE, check these sweet digits

Rolled 98 (1d100)

>>38003
Well, the 411 hotline is kind of a good roll.
>>38020
The god of luck looks unfavorably upon Rand Paul.

Rolled 8 (1d10)

>>38020
The guy who got all of the good rolls fucked up

Rolled 4 (1d10)

>>38020
The real mods/dusits dont want us to kill the Jew

>>38038
>>38039
THE MASTER OF LUCK IS BACK BABY

Can we continue with the quest now?
btw check my 5

>>38038
OH SHIT

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>>37854
You try pitifully to stab the Jew with your pitchfork, but critically miss and end up lightly poking him instead. The Jew takes 3 damage.

Eric Trump, however, spent last turn charging up his SHADOW BALL- and he launches it at the Jew. The Jew is consumed by dark energy and takes a hearty 30 damage.

The Jew is beginning to come to his senses, having acquired the two shekels! Next turn he MAY BE ABLE TO ATTACK.

What do you do?

Rolled 4 (1d10)

>>38061
GOD OF LUCK HELP ME NOW

Rolled 3 (1d10)

>>38061
Once again, rape attack the Jew.

>>38073
this is fine.

Rolled 4 (1d10)

>>38061
Seduce the jew

Rolled 1, 1, 1, 1, 1, 1, 1, 1, 1, 1 = 10 (10d1)

>>38061
>AGAIN with ERIC's LOADED DICE

Rolled 7 (1d10)

>>38061
SEDUCE THE JEW
SEDUCE LIKE THE DIRTY HOE YOU ARE

>>38082
>>38088
You're in OPEN COMBAT you idiots, you can't seduce the Jew now! You JUST stabbed him.

>>38088
Hitler dubs confirms.

Rolled 4 (1d10)

>>38061
attack juden

>>38094
But QM, he rolled dubs, doesn't that count for something?

Rolled 5 (1d10)

>>38094
Run away then.
I know my limits.
Rolling for escape

Rolled 3 (1d10)

>>38061
>ATTACK Der Jud

Maybe we can roll against the QM's to determine who gets the final hit on the MERCHANT?

>>38111
TRIPS TAKES PRIORITY OVER DUBS

Rolled 1 (1d10)

Distract Jew with asshole.

>>38061

kill jew

No running, lads. We need to complete the quest. Let's take down the Jew and bring Eric home.

Rolled 7 (1d10)

>>38094
ATTACK DER JUDE then. We have a pitchfork! What could go wrong?

>>38140
Look, I agree with you, but he got trips. This has to count for something.

Rolled 7 (1d10)

>>38107
Why would we even want to seduce the Jew when Eric "Hunk-of-a-man" Trump is right there? Kill the merchant, and since we've regained Eric's trust act like a hoe after the battle before we return him to his dad

>>38131
does this mean we fail so badly at distracting that we get a stealth bonus?

>>38140
No, we must run.
This is a batttle we cannot win.
The jew will just recharge his health with the shekels even if we do kill him

>>38174
>>38152
Oy gevalt, goyim. You're being distracted by showy tricks! USe your brains!

>>38191
Look, we'll just see what the QM does. We'll probably finish the Jew off this round anyways since we didn't critical miss at least.

>>38155
Our butthole actively causes people to look away. A magic stealth spell perhaps?

>>38204
I insist we must run, to keep fighting will surely mean death.
We escape, regain health, and increase exp by killing thailandese hookers. Then we return to kill the jew.

>>38219
Kek. Do some grinding? I don't want to pick up a disease and get poison damage, friendo.

The solution is to make both the jew and Eric low, then kill them both
Or just knock out Eric to take some od his power

>>38231
It's the only way, we are far too low level to defeat one of gods chosen people. Specially with such low health.
And who's to say eric won't attack us if/when the jew is defeated. We did just attack him earlier after all.

>>38255
>>38256
Look, if we kill Eric, we'll have the Wizard on us. Do you really want the Wizard to come after us? Think with your brains!! We already managed to convince Eric to attack the Jew for us. Clearly Eric is now convinced of our loyalty. Even if we killed both of them, we would not be a high enough level to take on the Wizard and all his lackeys.

Rolled 3 (1d10)

>>38279
PLEASE GOD OF LUCK DON'T FUCK US NOW PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE

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>>38100
You take another STAB at the Jew for 11 points of damage! The Jew is bleeding profusely!

Eric Trump slashes with his claws, dealing another 22 points of damage to the Jew! The Jew is in disarray, turns to look in you in the face, and shouts- "GOYIM! YOU'VE BETRAYED ME FOR THE LAST TIME!"

Suddenly, Eric launches in for a second attack... and the Jew leverages the Jewblade around his body to CRITICALLY SLICE ERIC'S NECK WIDE OPEN, dealing 130 damage! ERIC TRUMP IS DEAD!

You gained 100 experience points. You will level up at the conclusion of the fight!

The corpse of Eric Trump lies colorless in the rubble. The Jew approaches you, heaving, dragging the Jewblade. You will have the first strike next round should you choose to continue fighting.

What do you do, /qst/?!

Rolled 2 (1d10)

>>38279
fuck it
RAPE ATTACK HIM!

Rolled 1 (1d10)

>>38279
RUN!

Rolled 2 (1d10)

>>38294
DISARM THE JEW AND PRAY TO SERKET

Rolled 5 (1d10)

>>38294
GOD OF LUCK GIVE ME A SECOND CHANCE!

Rolled 8 (1d10)

>>38294
Tear off the Jew's arms

Rolled 4 (1d10)

>>38294

kill jew

Rolled 2 (1d10)

ATTACK JEW

>>38294
>>38306
TAKE THE HIGHEST ROLL

Rolled 10 (1d10)

>>38294
Become the Champion of Serqet, acquiring several benefits and stun the jew temporarily

>>38318
>10
SUPPORT

>>38318

christ

>>38294
>FINISH the JEW
We'll present the WIZARD with the JEW's BLADE and the KIPPAH as evidence that the JEW took ERIC'S LIFE.

>>38318
OY FUCKIN VEY

>>38318
SUPPORT SUPPORT SUPPORT

>>38318
OUR SAVIOUR
GOD BLESS SERQET

Your rolls sucked, now is great chance to run. The jew is injured and slow

>>38332
>10 is a bad roll
>>38318
Aw yeah

>>38318
SUPPORT

>>38332
fleeing wont work, Eric is already dead so the Jew only has us left to target. The only thing left now is to fight

Rolled 10 (1d10)

>>38318
This and the rape attack.
btw is my ID the same? I switched to the laptop. Either way I'm >>38096

>>38391
We must escapee before the jew draws health and power from the shekels which we mistakenly used to distract him. Its impossible to beat him at this point. Run, run, run.

>>38416
Jew has speed pills

>>38416
Shekels are just money.

>>38321
It's Serket.

>>38439
this guy doesnt understand we're fighting a jew? oy fuckin vey

>>38416
Shekels are not magic, and even if they were, Jews can't use magic, remember?
>>38444
Wikipedia says it's also Serqet.

>>38414
OK I think this reversal of luck is all due to Serqet.
Let's finish the jew while we can.

Rolled 8 (1d10)

>>38439
Just money? The jew draws his power from money.
>>38430
Shit, that's true.
Only one thing to do now
Seduce jew.
Offer jew our body for forgiveness
Rolling to seduce jew

>>38453
Not magic.
Jews drawing power from currency is a natural process. Like a plant drawing energy from the sun

>>38492
>Jews drawing power from currency is a natural process. Like a plant drawing energy from the sun
kek

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>>38318
>>38414
>2 10s
This must be the work of Serqet. We must become the bipedal scorpiongirl clearly.

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>>38304
You stab the Jew again with your pitchfork, hoping to keep him at bay! You're moderately successful, dealing 12 damage!

The Jew still has one more cleave of the Jewblade left in him though. He hauls it over his head and brings it down with incredible force over you! THIS IS THE END!

Except it's not. The Jew, sword raised above head, unexpectedly falls over cold. The life-force rushes out of his body and dissipates into the ground, as you all were right, Jews contain no magical energy. That Jewblade pretty much made up for that, huh?

And why? Well, standing over the Jew's faded cadaver is an old friend: the Dusit, tightly gripping his own cock as a weapon. The Jew took exactly 4 damage because of a miraculous roll that just as easily could have ended with 2 or 3 damage, and the corpse of Rand Paul.

But today you and your Dusit are victorious. The battlefield is smoldering, fresh with the scars of recent combat.

You leveled up, by the way. Twice. You are now level 4.

Your HP increased by 11.
Your MP increased by 5.
Your ATK increased by 3.

You feel kinda taller.

Both Eric Trump and the Jew are dead, and you have failed Mr. Trump's quest. The Dusit stands gasping from the shock of the latest events. The Jewblade lies in the rubble.

What a fucking mess you've made.

Really, what do you do now?

>>38507
Praise the Dusit, and promise it that it'll get its dick sown back on.
OP knew he didn't wanna reset from the last savepoint :')

>>38507
Trump'll revive Eric.
Bring him the body.

Rolled 10 (1d10)

>>38507
Kill dusit, he knows too much.
Then run the fuck away from the wizard.

>>38507
>>38318
OP plz

>>38527
NONONONONONONO PLEASD GOD NO

Rolled 3 (1d10)

>>38507
Bring Trump Eric's body and explain that a Jew did it all

>>38527
NOT THIS

>>38507
take JEWBLADE, stab dusit with it he is useless to us now.
Loot the shekels and get the fuck out of there before the jew revives.
Rolling for damage to dusit

Rolled 10 (1d10)

Cut off the Jew's nose.

Drag Eric's corpse to Trump and explain that right as you were about to bring him back, a Jew killed him. Get the Dusit in on it.

>>38507
Also, go back to the Wizard Trump and explain that Eric died of a Jew, but we killed the Jew in vengeance. Drag the body back, take the nose as proof of victory, etc. etc.

Rolled 9 (1d10)

>>38539
>>38544
I propose a roll-off to settle this. My turn first.

>>38544
TEN AND CHECKED HOLY SHIT THE DUSIT MAKES IT

>>38318
>>38414
>>38527
>>38544
>4 10s
This must be the work of Serqet
#CHAMPIONOFSERQET

Rolled 5 (1d10)

>>38543
shit son forgot my roll
Anyways time is of the essence. Leave the area before the jew revives

Rolled 2 (1d10)

>>38507
BOTTLE THE JEW BLOOD

If you can save the jew blood for a pinch, you might be able to use the jewblade for a battle .

>>38556
I concede and vote for >>38544

If we run from the Wizard itll just make everything worse

>>38544
Backed!

>>38567
This.
Also, for the record, we don't need to roll for everything, it's mostly just for battle and seduction.

>>38580
Rolling is fun though...

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Oh, hold on a minute. Rising up from Eric's corpse is THAILAND's RAREFLAG.

You heard the Jew mention this. Apparently these things are pretty valuable.

Take the RAREFLAG?

>>38613
TAKE IT

>>38613
take that shit

Rolled 2 (1d10)

>>38605
Rolling to learn the "Roll" skill (exactly the kind like in most games) just by natural luck.
>>38613
NO, we must not let the country die out. Put it back where it belongs (we can take it for now if this isn't the place where it belongs.)

>>38613
Take it. We can give it for free or sell it for a serious amount.
Also, OP >>38318

No. Do not take the jews nose. Soon as he revives he will look for it.
We got lucky this time. Who knows if we will be able to defeat the jew again. Loot everything and run.

>>38613
>TAKE!

It drains the power of the country, doesn't it? Please remind us, QM.

>>38613
Take it, it may serve you well should you need to get ladyboys to do you bidding.

>>38613
Take it

>>38630
The Jew is NOT going to revive, anon. You're just concern trolling at this point.

>>38630
The nose is the source of Jew power though. It allows them to sniff out sheckles in even the poorest of neighborhoods.

I propose we
>TAKE the RAREFLAG
>TAKE the JEWNOSE
>TAKE Eric's CORPSE

Whoever's in favor, back this!

>>38613
Collect it.
And kill the motherfucker DUSIT

>>38651
This and also
>TAKE the JEWBLADE

>>38651
Yea
>>38652
No, we need it to collaborate our story.

>>38651
Backing this.

>>38613
Also, OP, we have 26 mana total; +1 from the last time we leveled up, and the +5 we just gained from these 2 level ups, of course. Remember?
As a record of other things, we now also have +4 attack total.

>>38659
Right, so let's add this to my list!

Also, QM, can we have some dialogue with the DUSIT? That was pretty cool how he showed some courage with his DUSITCOCK and all.

>>38651
And take the JEWBLOOD

>>38645
Never heard of a jew reviving and killing his enemies?
>>38651
Leave the nose and corpses. Loot shit and run

>>38685
Dude, it takes 3 days for a jew to come back from the dead. I think you can chill.

>>38678
I'm on mobile so I can't roll
Someone please Roll for SEDUCE DUSIT
gotta get that courageous husbando

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>>38619
>>38623
>>38629
>>38634
>>38640
As soon as you touch the RAREFLAG, you begin to feel incredibly strange.

>>38701
lol'd

>>38701
In three days we can reach Malaysia which will be a safe distance from the jew. Though I don't know about the wizard.

>>38713
Rolling for LUCK

>>38713
oohhh shit m8

Rolled 4 (1d10)

>>38726

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>>38713
Oh shit what

>>38738
how ironic
>>38713
OH BOY WE GON DO IT

>>38713
Check self for sudden boobs. This is Thailand after all.

>>38634
>>>/news/41128

>>38787
Hence why we need the leverage against them. If they don't comply, we destroy the flag.

go on then op

>>38816
When using "hence" you do not need to add "why." It's redundant and implied in the word hence. It basically means "for this reason." You would not say "for this reason why we need the leverage against them."

File: gmq17.jpg (245KB, 1239x658px) Image search: [Google]

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>>38713
You travel for what feels like hours through a portal of vibrant, swirling colors- and land somewhere that is entirely new, and definitely not Thailand.

The recently slain corpses of the Jew and Eric Trump apparently followed you. And the Dusit, too!

Jesus Christ, where could you be now?

There is a SAVE MOOGLE nearby.

>>38840
check license plate and if dusits cock is attached or not

>>38840
Where's the Jewblade?

Also, lets save

>>38846
This check license plates to verify our location.
Strike dusit with jew blade

File: lp.png (523KB, 1089x242px) Image search: [Google]

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>>38846
You check the license plate of the nearest car.

Hmm.

DUSITCOCK status is unattached.

>>38840
>SAVE
>TALK to DUSIT
>"Where do you think we are, buddy? Hold onto your cock, we'll get you some medical attention soon... good job on the Jew, btw."
>CHECK the LICENSE PLATE

>>38851
We cant use the Jewblade, QM explained this about a 100 times

Rolled 8 (1d10)

seduce dusit

>>38854
Take the flag from the plate, giving you 2 flags.

>>38854
shit bulgaria.
Do like a syrian refugee and head north to the less poor parts of Europe.
Kill dusit first. Drink his blood to regain health.

>>38871
seconded

>>38840
SAVE

File: dusit.png (172KB, 305x341px) Image search: [Google]

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[[And with that, we're gonna end the playing session for the night.

It was pretty exciting, huh? First boss fight. Even though the Jew did most of the work.

I'll take any questions you guys have about the lore, game mechanics, etc for a little while now. Then heading off to bed.

>>38850
Only corpses or living creatures were transported when you touched the flag. Basically anything dead or alive within a small radius. Nobody was holding the Jewblade, it was just lying in the rubble. So it's somewhere in Nightmare Thailand now.]]

>>38901
Serqet got the most support OP

>>38901
I only want to be reminded of one thing: what power does the flag have again?

Thank you for being an excellent QM!

>>38911
If it's taken out of its respective country, the country starts to die.

>>38901
do we have to worry about the wizard or the king of the Jews hunting us down
do we have to flee around the world from them

>>38922
I remember that, but does it give us some sort of power? I didn't think it would make us teleport either.

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>>38911
[[The flag regulates the thin veil between REALITY and UNREALITY in Thailand. When UNREALITY begins to take over, naturally things begin to fall into chaos.

Usually normal people can't see the kinds of things we can. But now that you have taken the flag out of Thailand, the existence of all kinds of magical monsters and creatures will be revealed to the average citizenry. It's basically like the Harry Potter secrecy thing, or if you've ever played Shin Megami Tensei, the way demons get into the human world.]]

>>38934
[[Well, you don't have the Jewblade. You're pretty safe from the Jews.]]

how old is dusit

>>38943
I've played SMT on SNES so I understand. Neat! I wonder how we'll see Thailand in chaos!

>>38934
Probably Wizard. One measly jew vs Trump's son.
>>38935
Clearly it is in our destiny to acquire all the flags.
>>38943
OP, you missed the Champion of Serqet roll.
>>38952
Under 30 presumably

>>38907
[[I chose the first response.]]
>>38935
[[Oh, and yes, the Thai Rare does give you a special power. I haven't decided what yet though.]]

>>38964
It was the third response tho

>>38964
Ok, let's get this established.
FLAGS
1. Make the supernatural visible to the plebs in a given country when its flag is removed.
2. Make the country decay.
3. Give you a unique power.

>>38964
Do you always choose the first response or is it just for rolls?

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>>38963
>>38952
[[That Dusit? He's only a few years old. But that's in dog years.]]

>>38968
[[He responded to the post I made without the picture. I'll admit, I used the wrong roll and should have just used 3 instead, but I didn't want to use Serqet just because it got a 10 because praying is cheap and it doesn't work. Plus, of course everyone is going to support the best scenario for them, but that's not always the best path for the story to go down I think. Nobody would have been clamoring for Serqet if he only rolled an 8.]]

>>38998
[[First response gets a lot of weight, then whatever's getting a lot of support. I have executive decision though ultimately to prevent derailing.

But like, for example, I didn't think you guys would want to go right back to the Jew's home. I was planning that to happen much later. But it won a vote or something I think, and that was fine, because that's an interesting sort of derail.]]

>>39033
It would've been neat having us become a champion of Serqet, collecting flags and shit.
clearly it was a stroke of luck Four Tens

>>39033
I could tell all along you didn't care for this praying shit! Good on you, QM. I think your method for choosing which response to go with is fair.

>>39085
[[I don't know, you pray to YHWH and in rushes a Jew to save the day? You decide whether or not that's divine intervention.

Alright, I'm going to bed. Goodnight all, pretty sure I'll be around tomorrow.]]

>>39121
Then clearly Serket must've given us a spree of lucky rolls

>>39121
>sweatymerchant.jpg

Hey OP, when are you usually on and questing? I need to know when to monitor the thread.

[[bump, sorry guys no quest today, im busy

im gonna make a new thread when the quest comes back. if someone could screenshot/save this one for archival purposes that would be appreciated]]

>>45558
On it OP, gonna save all your quests
Yours is the best one here desu
keep up the good work

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>>39033
OP, you contradicted yourself. A few days ago in the previous thread you said all Dusits are IT, not HE. Stop misgendering the dusit u cis sgum :^)))

>>55863

didn't we tear his penis off

RIP OP?

>>62513
I hope not. This is the best quest on /qst/ right now. Melancholic is a close second

Pretty sad desu senpai

pls come back OP