>gorgeous grill at my uni, freckles, red hair, nice ass, flat

>>16458224
>What can I do with my car to impress her?
You can try cleaning it for once.

>>16458224
where do you live? Like location/region

>>16458224
Add flame decals and get it stanced. For music you have to play eurobeat

>>16458224
rose pedals on the seat and floor, put some candles in the glove box and center console

>Call her and tell her to come outside a few mins early
>Blast Slayer
>Pull up to her house and do sick J turn while simultaneously opening the passenger door for her
>Be wearing sunglasses
>Dont say a word
>Do even sicker J turn when dropping her off
>tell her grass or ass for the ride
>wade into dat pussy

>>16458224

Bruh.
Dont stress this. Get car detailed. Shower. Keep music low at talking volume. Make conversation. Just be you. Easy day.

>>16458263
This, don't put on cologne, just make sure you smell clean. Ask her what she likes doing over weekends. Offer to take her hiking sometime, get your dick sucked on some trail. Works everytime

>>16458263
>Get car detailed...
>since you're going to be a free Uber for the afternoon
OP probably is autistic enough to get his car detailed just for this

>>16458224
Serious answer.

Clean it thoroughly, but don't put weird fresheners. Drive nicely, try not to showboat too much. What some find fun, others find absolutely frightening. Don't blast music, talk to her.

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>>16458263
This

Just b yourself :)

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>>16458224
>today i messaged her on facebook and asked her if she wanted me to give her a ride to uni since its very cold to walk and take the bus


Huh.

>>16458224
>>>/r9k/
Also:
>>>/mu/
They will give you some good music advice. I hear normie girls love Death Grips or that trout beef face album.

>>16458297
>no advice because no girls have been in tripfags car

>>16458224
WHAT DO YOU DRIVE?

>>16458224
Just play the FM station in your area that plays the current "top X" normie hits

Download all of Zhu's albums. If she's basic at all she'll love it. She'll probably still like it if she's not. Very casual listening, but very groovy.

Let me guess OP, you drive an SUV.

>>16458322
>Just play the FM station in your area that plays the current "top X" normie hits
what do you listen to Mr.Patrician? Anime OSTs and music from Initial D arcade stage 3? lmao

>>16458317
2002 audi a4

G-grills like luxury badges right?

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>>16458317

Don't listen to idiots suggesting music, use the time to ask her some questions like what she does over weekends and shit

>>16458331
Dad rock and power metal cause I have no taste

>>16458276

This nigger knows his shit.

Cute bitches love hiking.

>>16458247
this

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>>16458276
>don't put on cheap cologne*
ftfy

p.s. flat-chested girls like this album trust me

>>16458343
this

>>16458288
>>16458263

>tfw lost a 10/10 girl because I tried acting "chad" because I believed the r9k memes

Honestly OP just BEE yourself, do not try faking anything because you'll look autistic. However for music I'd have the radio on a neutral "normie" radio station

>>16458247

wet panties guaranteed

>How can I change myself so a stranger likes me?
>How do I lie to her about who I am?

You're either your own man or you're a bitch who drops what little he has of his character at the first sight of pussy.

>>16458370
>tfw lost a 10/10 girl because I tried acting "chad" because I believed the r9k memes
can we please get a greentext synopsis? I love reading these sort of stories

if you really must play music just give the gril your aux jack, then youll find out what she likes

>>16458256
thank you I needed this laugh today

>>16458370
>>16458379
Seconding this request.

>>16458224
what car anon
if you drive a bimmer or an audi you can literally shit all over the car and she will still like it

>>16458334
Ah, that's a B6 then. Those still look pretty new.

Just make sure it's clean.

Eurobeat

>>16458354
Jokes aside, soft sort of electronic albums is an excellent choice.

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>>16458406
wasn't joking friendo

here's another good one

>>16458370
>>16458379
third. you better get ur ass in here and drop that greentext

>>16458263
>Offer to take her hiking sometime
who the fuck goes hiking anymore? fuck off grandpa.

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>>16458263

>>16458370
greentext this shit please

>>16458224
here's what you do

>don't say a word
>bite on a toothpick
>get a Patek Phillipe watch
>get a white t shirt
>get a Levi's blue denim jacket
>silver bomber jacket with a scorpion on the back
>get a pair of raw selvage denim
>get a pair of brown leather shoes
>you never say a word if she talk
>only stare at her
>play nightcall by kavinsky
>carry a hammer and a mask in the backseat

now you can be a real human bean

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>>16458424
>Not posting the superior version

>>16458421
t. horribly depressed loser

>>16458413
>literally knew a girl that would drop panties if you happened to put on any bowie
it was an amazing phenomenon

This is why I drive a slightly lifted pickup on all terrains with light bars.
Pandora latest country music seals the deal usually.

>>16458413
Legit. LateNightTales series albums are often good too, especially Sasha Scene Delete
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Puz9PzY_etM

Soft electronic music will also keep anon calm which helps.

>>16458247
All this. Make sure to also hide a bunch of black ice air fresheners everywhere for that crisp, masculine scent as well. And stash an ice cold Rockstar in the glove compartment so you can offer her a cool tasty beverage to compliment her ride.

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>>16458438
Saved. Have one back.

I usually start off with a magic trick or two. It breaks the ice.

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>don't bother cleaning your car cause grills like an alpha who don't give a fuck
>wear strong cologne cause bitches love cologne
>tell her to come out 10 minutes early and rip a handbrake skid in front of her house when you're about to stop
>wear driving gloves to look like a pro
>tape hand to steering wheel
>give delayed responses like ryan gosling in the movie Drive
>keep a toothpick in your mouth at all times
>race everyone on the way


You got this op, simple stuff

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B6 are nice btw
>take girl to car show
> over take traffic (2 lane hwy) @ 110mph
>let off gas
>cop around corner
>go to theatre
>get head afterwards

feels good but sold it already

>>16458486
>niggered rear lights

>>16458224
>non-autistic responce
Take a shower beforehand if you don't regularly and shave. Clean the car and clean it well, spray some Febreeze or throw a Black Ice car freshener in there. Try and make small talk, see what she likes and if you two have any common interests. Play some top 40 or rock, keep it kinda quiet (volume at 4-5 out of 10)
>hilarious autistic responces
>>16458247
>>16458256
>>16458259
>>16458297
>>16458434

>>16458518
>spray some Febreeze or throw a Black Ice car freshener in there.
Don't do this. Just cleaning your car will get rid of any smell. If it smells like Febreeze she'll know you normally stink and just bought some garbage to cover it up.

>>16458421
Women like active guys that go out and do shit, not autistic NEETS that stay home and play vidya all day

>>16458224
OP Have something to talk about that is light and current events type stuff, but not politics. That way if there is any awkward silence you have that filler. Again, nothing political, could be something local. Have it be a bit of a light story.

Also make sure to ask her out

>>16458524
Fair point. But if cleaning doesn't remove the smell or you perchance left a cooler of deer steaks in your trunk for a month, Black Ice the motherfucker.

>>16458537
No, clean and leave windows open over night

>>16458331
This. Play it safe with normie music. Ask her what music she likes of course.

>>16458440
kys. no one likes hiking except for you spergelord. the fuck is the point of wandering around in some shady, disgusting wood anyway?

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>>16458546
>implying an air-dry can deodorize rotting deer blood
I almost had to sell my car because that godawful smell wouldn't get out, trust me.

>>16458546
Hope it doesn't rain if he parks outside. Still I think just cleaning it is enough. I imagine OP is into his car and it doesn't stink in the first place.

Hang black ice tree

>>16458549
>Ask her what music she likes of course.
Nah, don't do that. Just have something neutral on at a low volume. Asking on such a short trip is extremely beta. Just act like you normally would if someone was in your car. As long as it isn't heavy metal or something it's fine.

>>16458536
>Also make sure to ask her out
is that really a good idea to do when your not even going out but just a ride?

>>16458224
Take a fast drive with the windows open to vent all the smell out. Take out all rubbish and clean out your glove box. If your car is really shitty you can tell her you just bought it second hand and you haven't got time to sort everything out. Doesn't work if she saw you driving it every day, though.

>>16458600
Well not immediately in the car, but yeah OP is into her he should ask to do something else in the future. Could be on Facebook the next day or something.

>>16458517
Bought like that *shrugs*

>>16458586
You're right. It's actually pretty uncommon for guys to ask girls their music taste, or vice versa. Usually this sort of conversation is made by two dudes.

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>>16458518
>>16458524
>>16458537
>>16458546
>>16458565
>>16458567
>>16458584
>>16458612
Why does everyone assume OPs car smells?

>>16458224
Clean your car. Don't be a fucking creep and make her uncomfortable. You will never talk to her again if you step over the line by trying to feel her up or something similar. Don't believe the red pill.

Don't try to impress. Talk to her and ask about her life. If she doesn't open up you need to show some vulnerability and talk about your own.

Make sure to follow up with some way to meet again in the future at the end.

If it doesn't work out well don't be a sperg.

Break her legs or an arm, make sure she is dependant on you driving her to uni everyday.

>>16458629
Well I mean I ask in conversation, but not on a 10 minute car ride having her choose was is on in the background. You want to talk anyways.

My gf is a huge music nerd and we talk music all the time, but, if I pick her up to take her to work whatever is on is fine.

>>16458632
>browsing 4chan
>not being a lazy messy cunt

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If it's not going well and there are only a few minutes left in the trip, try to cut some of her hair off without her noticing so you can keep it and smell it while fapping

>>16458633
It's all about finding the golden ratio between being alpha and being a overly caring beta cuck. OP should look confident and dominant, but caring and loveable too.

>>16458650
>not trying to rape her because you'll never find contact with a female ever again

>>16458666
Not today, Satan.

Picked up girls a few times. My car smelled so amazing after. Women smell so good.

>>16458666
This is actually a really good idea

>>16458524
>Just cleaning your car will get rid of any smell

I didn't name my car "the fart palace" for nothing. No amount of febreeze can cover up the stench seeping from my cloth seats

>>16458705
Get some sheep skin covers for them then, easy peezy

>>16458224
>music

there is only one option OP

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HEXWRTEbj1I

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>>16458685
anon why did you remind me that

>>16458661
It's called not being a pushover. Have a life outside of finding a girlfriend and sex. Girls are not aliens. R9k, red pill, and other shit like that is cancer for your mind. If you will roll over and let yourself be exploited just for 10 minutes of shitty sex what else will you roll over for?

Only permavirgins will really believe red pill and r9k memes and it's fucking tragic.

>>16458705
this is the reason i hate cars without leather
i feel like i sit on a thousend saved farts of the previous owner

>>16458729
im with you anon

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>>16458433
>>16458379
>>16458397
>>16458416

It's a absolute let down if you're expecting anything funny

>be at uni, 18 year old KV with no friends
>22 yr old 10/10 shows interest
>liked her because of her personality, really smart etc
>sat alone at lunch in our uni's "halls" (canteen where they served everyone food)
>intimidated by her being older and far better looking than me, and very smart
>once I figured out she might be interested I started acting totally differently, stopped BEEing myself and got stressed out about every little thing I said
>girl keeps asking for my facebook (I genuinely didn't have one)
>girl keeps subtly asking for my number and kept moving the conversation on because I didn't want to appear desperate
>got possessive and acted spergy around other people talking to her
>tried "showing off" I guess by bigging up myself
>if she asked if I was busy after tea I said I was "revising", (I was shitposting in my room and scared of sperging out with her)
>eventually she just gets fed up and we don't talk anymore
>still a KV (although I'm still 18)

>>16458561
Hiking, especially backwoods, is one of the most alpha hobbies a man can have. We wouldn't expect a lowtest numale like yourself to understand, though.

Jesus christ. I did not realize /o/ was full of THIS MUCH autists

>>16458224
HAVE SOMTHING INTERESTING TO TALK ABOUT


READ THE LOCAL NEWS AS WELL AS WORLD NEWS AND WHEN THE SILENCE GETS AUKWARD YOU CAN BRING UP THE NEWS TO BREAK THE DEAD AIR

ASK HER WHAT SHE THINKS

>>16458685
I don't know how you come to that conclusion. Most smell like normal people. Some wear overwhelming amounts of perfume and that's pretty awful.

Some girls really do have a nice smell but you have to be like an inch from them to smell it.

>>16458783
Robot confirmed. Small talk is fucking boring and if you're using a car ride you're wasting your time. That kind of shit is something you talk about the first time you meet someone and almost never afterwards unless you are strangers.

>>16458313
That shit won't matter, especially since OP is at college with a car and the girl doesn't have a ride. Just don't be completely autistic and she will be happy to use you for free rides.

>>16458783
THIS OP

START TALKING ABOUT HOW GREAT TRUMP IS!!!

>>16458812
Can confirm. Once you become the guy that gives her rides, she will ask for them without you offering. Just dont be a cuck and capitalize on that shit

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Show up high. Blast eurobeat. Never look at her or say a word until you drop her off and say "have a good one."

Is this so hard?

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>everyone ITT acting like her accepting a ride when it's single-digit temps means ANYTHING at all
She accepted a ride in a heated car because the alternative was being out in the cold. She'll string OP along as long as he's nice to her, accepting rides, gifts, food, whatever, because that's what women do. He won't realize she has zero interest in him until he tries desperately to set up an actual romantic situation and falls on his face.

>>16458224
>>16458812
OP, if you let yourself get exploited by offering rides with nothing in return you're a retard and rolling over for nothing. Offer rides but you should get something small in return. Like coffee or milk tea. Failing that, direct payment for gas and mileage. If she doesn't do it, cut her out of your life.

All of the stories about friendzoned betas is because none of you retards will stand up for yourselves and not get exploited.

>>16458940
You're also a retard.

Holy fuck this thread is just full of people that clearly have never actually talked to girls. Of course they're going to exploit you if you're a pushover. Literally anyone with a brain would do this. Stand up for yourself and don't take that kind of bullshit.

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>>16458940
We all know that.

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>>16458940
>>16458963
Wait really?

>>16458974
I didn't. I mean I thought that since she said she yes maybe she kind of liked him, or potentially might.

>>16458984
It's cold out and he offered a warm ride. It doesn't mean she has any interest in him. He just has to not sperg out and ask her out to see if she does.

>>16458518
>throw a Black Ice car freshener in there
If you want her to get a headache and throw up.

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>>16458984
Unless he acts like a normal, decent human AND looks decently enough AND creates an 'aura of mystery' about himself AND acts like it ain't no thang AND doesn't let her step all over him THEN he has no chance other than certain embarrassment / cucking.

Trust me, women are a waste of energy. Just do drugs or turn into a car or some shit.

>>16458984
Of course she's going to take a free ride. But a relationship is give and take. And something small like a cup of tea and some time to talk is reasonable payment for a ride.

If all you do is give, that's not a relationship. That's charity. If all you do is give and all you get is sex, that's a prostitute, not a real relationship.

And if you're remotely well off you'll understand that someone's time and effort is far more valuable than money.

>>16459013
Why are they a waste of energy?

>>16459004
Then she can't deal and is unfit /o/ gf material

>>16459025
Normally if I give a friend a ride, I don't ask them for anything. If I do it a bunch a good friend will offer to pay for gas or something. But, if he gives this broad a quick ride she doesn't owe him anything imo.

>>16459013
>>16459027
My last gf tried to sue me for common law marriage. I'm taking a break from women for a while.

>>16459013
>>16459027
They really aren't unless you believe friends are also a waste of time.

>>16459029
This is also retarded.

>>16459033
It depends on what you mean by a ride. If it's all of half a mile then yes. But if a ride is over 15 minutes of driving don't be a free uber. The point here is that you should never give something for nothing. You can defer repayment but don't give something away for free.

>>16458224
Play Mozart's Requiem in Dmin. Blast Dies Irae 100% volume. Drift around every corner. Rig the passenger airbag to go off at the end of the ride.

>>16459040
this.
in bc, if you've been living together for over 6 months they can take half your shit

>>16458329
agreed

>>16459077
Just when I thought canada couldn't get any more cucked

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>>16459075

>>16459062
>unless you believe friends are also a waste of time
The rare, true friend, no. Everyone else yeah. And female friends are DEFINITELY a waste of time, because if you're not fucking them then you're reminded of that fact constantly, and if you ARE fucking one, she won't let you be around any of the others without suspecting you of cheating. Female friends are a lose/lose situation. Stick to male acquaintances, one REAL friend you give most of your attention to, and one girlfriend or no girls at all.

>>16458762
Are you sure you aren't just a good looking sperglord? As in, autistically assertive which girls might like but completely incompetent when it comes to actually hanging out with them?

>>16458770
let me guess, you are into cafe racers and woodworking too?

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>hey /o/ lets talk about this new car
>thread dies after 3 replies

>hey /o/ look at this miata/twingo
>100 answers and 20 sold plushies

>hey /o/ lets talk about this anon who wants to smell that girl in his car
>200 answers within 10 seconds

>>16458730
>tfw redpilled by r9k
Its too late mate, i take girls as queens

>>16459077
That's fucked up. Because BC, I'm assuming that's a libcuck law? Men and women should be equal so let's give women more rights and allow them to take all of their boyfriend's shit.

Also black people are equal to whites so we should give them a bunch of stuff for free and make it eaiser to get certain jobs and easier to get into good schools and then pay for that school. Liberals a best!

>>16459215

>/o/ - Twingo plushies and virgins

Seems about right.

>>16459223
it works both ways, so on the flip side you could leech off a rich girl for a while and claim her shit...

>>16458224
You've got to tell us more, OP. Do you talk with her or was this just an offer you made completely out of nowhere? If so, she's taking you for a ride. You'll end up on her phone under "free lift after a night out drinking, partying and riding the cock carousel" next to that smelly overweight beta known only as "free lunch".

>What can I do with my car to impress her?
What do you drive? If nothing else just drive smoothly. If you go quick, do so without looking like a sperg. If manual, don't fucking stall. The drive is a round where you can only lose points. She doesn't give a shit about auto or manual, just how new and clean the car looks. Or how expensive it is.

Also

>flat chest

Disgusting tbqh.

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>>16459215

This maybe /o/, you know, but we're still a 4chan board, the internet equivalent of the short bus

>>16458730
my whole life is pretty much me being a pushover.

one time i said something when a guy got in front of me in a line at a grocery store and it was a major accomplishment for me

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>>16458224
Pretty simple senpai.
>Put on some cologne
>If you blush easy put some foundation on yo cheeks
>Put yo favorite radio station on low
>If things seem to be working out well take her out on a suprise lunch or dinner

>be me
>barely clean my car interior ever
>get constantly girls to ride with me
>some beer cans in the back on the floor
>bunch of papers everywhere
>some ash here and there
>girls don't say shit they just sat there and we talk and joke
>they even seems to like it

I have to say that I always have black ice in my car, other that that I don't clean shit and always get girls to ride with me

>>16459233
>men ever winning in marriage/divorce/child-related court situations
>in a cucked country where such a law exists in the first place

Rent a Ferrari nugguh, after all you want to leave a good first impression.

>>16459223
Thankfully I live in Miami and Florida doesn't have Common Law. But she was from Texas so since I stayed at her place like twice she tried to say it was a common dwelling. She lost, thankfully.

>>16459233
AB here.

My girlfriend is about to move in within me soon and I'm scared.

>>16459332
Lel with me*** fuck I know that typo is gonna wreck any serious replies.

I had a similar feel to OP

>senior prom
>autist no gf loser
>gather up the courage to ask cute shy girl to go to the prom with me
>she says yes
>pick her up in my father's 1970 chevelle

One of my best memories.

>>16459175

Definitely not good looking apart from being 6'4".

I'm not assertive/"chad" like at all either, it's just the autism, although I seem to get on much better with older people.

I have saw a few people like what you're describing though

>>16459350
Try thinking about the "what ifs" less. You are focusing to much on what they think and what they say. Its just a casual conversation. You stammering "s..sup". Doesn't make you look alpha.

>>16459332
In AB you don't get cucked if you owned the house prior to her moving in.

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>>16459332
Alberta is based you're okay.

>>16459350
dude just have interesting shit to talk about, play a random catchall radio station and try to make a friend

if you try super hard to impress her its gonna be weird as fuck, imagine if someone did that with you

talk about world news, talk about, local events (that are free) ask if she has ever been to the local art museum and what her major is

>>16458224
If you have a car why do you take a bus?

>>16459077
It's two years, but unlike the other provinces everything you've owned in your whole life is now 50/50. The other provinces are typically three years and it only applies to joint purchases becoming 50/50.

If someone's not happy with what they have it's an unjust enrichment case not a spousal case.

>>16458421
If you go on tinder every other girl will have "I like hiking" in her bio. Literally everyone even remotely interesting likes being in nature.

>>16459411
No, he has to gel his hair, drive a yellow wrangler thats jacked up, and listen to blink 182. He also has to talk really loud.

>>16459275
That could never work anon.

OP U HAVE TO WRITE TOMORROW WHAT HAPPENED SO WE KNOW HOW NOT TO ACT AND SPERG OUT ON A DIFFRENT LEVEL!!!!!!!!!!!!

!

>>16459505
Why?

>>16459370
>Its just a casual conversation
I know that now, I was autismo and believed that if I acted like that I'd appear "desperate" for some reason. I went to a mostly boys school (normal state one which just happened to be all boys) before uni so had no experience at all talking to girls.

>>16459411

I think the only reason I sperged so hard was because of her looks/age, while I was BEEing myself everything was going ok. Thanks anon

>>16459518
>implying a qt has apetite sitting next to OP

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Grab some Rush. Chicks really dig the Holy Triumvirate. Caress of Steel or Hemispheres FTMFW.

2112 or Moving Pictures would be too mainstream. You want to be play The Necromancer or The Trees when you pick her up. She'll be SUPER impressed.

>>16459535
Actually he could just go get lunch while driving her.

>>16459529
Usually thinking rationally and logically without involving emotion stops sperging out.

>>16459546
this nigga think its 1978 lol

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>>16458317

>>16458224
>Wear driving gloves and a scorpion jacket
>Lean over from the driver's seat to open the door for her
>Make sure you have a toothpick to offer her
>If she asks what the hammer under the seat is for just smile vaguely and ask her if she wants to see something

>>16458518
>black ice
there's your first mistake. Royal pine is far superior and doesn't make you look like a douchebag

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>>16458666

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>>16459687
black forest is the best of both worlds

>>16459243
It stops whenever you choose for it to stop.

>>16459708
Shit where can I find this?

>>16459708
Why not put actual pine oil somewhere then instead of this cardboard soaked in chemical waste?

>>16459747
Because the oil evaporates and makes a viscous film on the insides of the windows

>>16458434
"hey do you want to see something?"

>>16459751
You're not supposed to pour half a gallon into your car. If it's real extract a few drops will be sufficient for a scent.

>>16458783
10K FIRM...I KNOW WHAT I'VE GOT...NO LOW-BALLERS...THIS IS A TRUE CLASSIC SHITPOST

>>16459771
>not supposed to pour half a gallon into your car
oh

>>16459777
TRIPS OF TRUTH! I REPEAT TRIPS OF TRUTH!

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>CURRENT YEAR
>not playing Nightcall and A Real Hero
enjoy not getting the grill

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>>16458666

>>16458224
OP, understand that you like her more than she likes you at this moment in time.

Dont weird her out, just be cool and take things slow. Show casual interest in her, ask her how class is going, talk about your family. Works every time for me.

Its not the end of the world if things dont go perfect. The best relationships i was in weren't forced.

I will never understand how there are people this retarded about girls

>>16459826
>Implying most of these anons aren't trying to force another greentext story like egg anon.

>>16459833
Egg anon?

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>>16459934

>>16459546
kek

I like Rush but this is terrible advice

>>16459937
Ah so it never happened

>>16458313
I have have had multiple grills in my car anon.

>>16458224
the best thing to do is make conversation,
You could ask what radio station she listens to and tune your car to that station.

Drive smooth but not slow, theres a fine line between gramps and spastic driving with girls.

Could get her something from a drive thru for breakfast if you have time

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Literally just make it spotless. This means Exterior / interior. I use turtle wax wax and dry for instances like this as it doesn't take a long time. Have a nice air freshener and use to specification but make it a neutral scent...nothing cloying. Music like top 40 (unless you know she likes otherwise) at a reasonable volume but not what someone would consider low. Lastly drive like a human bean and not like some boy racer. This is all about comfort here...you want her to feel like you are dependable enough not to wreck.

Bonus tip..having something personal in the car cant hurt. I have my bike gear and sometimes my bike thrown in back. Its good for conversations and whatnot...This depends on vehicle I have a crossover so I have a bit more space than you may have...

>>16460986
Sorry forgot to mention I also use turtle wax dash and glass for interior..

>>16458224
>ask her about her plans for the day
>"My boyfriend is chilling at my house while I go to classes and we're gonna go for some drinks later. Wanna come?"
Enjoy your life, OP

>>16458984
That's what makes serial killers. Some creep (you) thinks a girl likes him because of some meaningless interaction, he gets redpilled, and then he feels it's his mission to rid the world of the plague of girls with blonde hair and green eyes infecting it.

>>16458224
>She actualy fucking said yes
well yeah its a free ride you stupid fucking faggot KEKEKEKEKEKEKEK

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>>16459646

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>look decent, not over dressed not full dirtbag
>be clean (shower, shave, brush your goddamn teeth, clean car, etc.)
>but on bruce springsteen quietly in the background
>don't drop your spaghetti
>try to make conversation about her, but make yourself sound somewhat interesting. light topics
>ask if she'd like another ride after you drop her off, mention you enjoyed talking with her if she hasn't given you a cold shoulder.
>if you've gotten the cold shoulder, drop all contact unless she resumes contact, then you have a better position

desu senpai it's how i got to know my fiancee early on in our relationship. if it doesn't work out then just say such is life and move on

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>>16458224
>>16458247
>>16458259
>>16458263
>>16458297
>>16458322
>>16458343
>>16458413
do not play music anyone on this board suggests to you, do NOT take advice from /mu/

just hand her the aux cable

even no music will be better than something from here

If you buy coffee in the morning, get a cup for her too, but don't bring her coffee if you make it at home.

bee yourself, make small talk, ask if she wants to be driven back home, ask her again if she wants to make this a regular thing

if it becomes a regular thing, you're in the pussy my man

Hopefully its not too late for you to read this but here's a real answer.

Clean your car. Make sure there's no crumbs and shit, nothing in the back seat. Don't over do it just make it look nice.

Get an air freshener. Not that shitty black ice shit that will suffocate you, get one of those vent clips. And if you're worried about music just find a genre on YouTube most people would enjoy and auto play it.

If you're still nervous just look up some conversation starters. You'll be fine

she's just using you as a convenience. she doesn't give a shit about an ugly virgin driving a 90s shitbox.

>>16458224
Clean your car, inside and out. You don't play music unless she doesn't want to play hers. You always give the girl command of the radio you fool.

>>16459040
You ex did what?
Sued you for what???
God it feels good to be an eurotrash sometimes.

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>>16461000
:(

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>nice car, Anon... are you like a professional driver
u-u-u-yyyeah, sure
>ugh, that is so COOL LOL can you show me a drift?
S-s-sure, m'lady
>*ENTER A ONE SECOND NOODLE DRIFT INTO THE GUARD RAIL, DISLODGING A WHEEL AND HAVING THE GIRLS HEAD SLAM AGAINST THE WINDOW, SHATTERING IT AND HAVING HER RUN OUT OF THE CAR, SCREAMING


>barely audible "You too!" coming from inside the car

Have any of you ever been in a girls car? They're fucking disgusting.

You guys are acting as if girls actually give a fuck about a clean car.
Unless you drive a brand new car they will think its s nasty piece of shit.
Girls don't even keep their own car clean.

>important forms, mail and documents everywhere.
>3 pairs of spare leggings in the trunk
>expensive water bottles scattered around as subtle decoration
>mirrors all smudged
>17 different phone cords, cables and chargers
>5 blutooth devices
>each tire a different air pressure
>wet wipes everywhere
>interior smells like a shopping mall
>washer fluid always empty
>lip balm in every compartment

anons here seem to think that every girl has the same music taste, more specifically anything that's not popular here

just listen to whatever you normally would but keep it low volume

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>>16462805
Common Law Marriage. Basically if you live with someone enough and mix finances in any way (like joint pay for rent), certain states that is considered being married under "common law".

She was from Texas where they do have common law, but I'm from Florida (which doesn't) and so she wasn't able to do it.

What happens is women get bitter about the breakup (I broke up with her and she went nuts about it) and they get some bulldog attorney to try and fuck with you and get some money. It still cost me since I had to get a lawyer to defend myself. The legal system in America is fucking awful.

Honestly women aren't worth it. Maybe I just pick them bad but at this point I'd rather just have an ice cream cone and go fap or get a whore (it's cheaper than a gf, and for sure a wife).

>>16463145
My gf keeps her car extremely clean. She does have the lip gloss thing going on though, and only because of me does she have even tire pressures...

>>16458224
>flat chest
>gorgeous

Choose one.

>>16463450
I like anorexic looking chicks. I fap to stuff like in >>>/fa/thinspo and the thread on /s/ right now with anorexic girls.

>>16463469
mah nigga

>>16458239
This. Show up with a minty fresh ride on the inside. Vacuum out all the cheeto dust, and remove the empty mountain dew bottles. The exterior doesn't even need to be that good, as long as it's not absolutely filthy. Good luck anon.

>all these replies
literally how to not get laid.
if you show you care shes gonna get spooked or tag you as beta.
girl must not know you care too much.

>>16463662
Agreed. I literally pee in my girlfriends mouth and she stays with me.

Just show up listening to conservative talk radio. Can't go wrong. The voices will help with the awkward cabin silence.

>>16463672
idk if its ironic or not,
but women are going to fulfill every single fetish even gross garbage like scat or pissing as long as shes sure you dont regard her as slut.

>>16463680
THIS IS THE DIANE REHMS SHOW TODAY WE'RE GOING TO TALK ABOUT..

>>16463691
It was ironic. I don't have a gf :o(

>>16463224
Fuck buddys are where it's at anon.

>>16463662
Sounds like you're in high school desu senpai.

>>16463672
I did that once. She broke up with me shortly afterwards.

>>16463700
HOW YOU CAN MAKE BABY JESUS HAPPY BY GETTING YOUR OWN INFANTS CIRCUMCISED

>>16463714
I feel like it would be hard to actually pee in a girls mouth while getting a blowjob. Maybe not. Guess I've never tried it.

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>>16461973
Well, they certainly should NOT listen to someone who saves and reposts /mu/ charts. Like, you're that much of a fuckboy to think that you can acquire good taste through some algorithm conceived by a dropout /mu/tant?

Get the fuck outta here

>>16459734
i dont know what that means
i can't just instantly be 100% different from how i've been my whole life

i know it's something that can change, but it's gonna be a lot of hard work

>>16464406
just remember that if you screw this up she WILL tell all of her friends about it and they'll have inside jokes with each other where you are the punchline

no pressure though anon you'll be fine

>>16464414
i think you meant to respond to someone else

>>16464420
sorry I thought you were OP

>>16458341
You'll be rolling in pussy OP

PERFECT GENTLEMAN!!

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Be completely normal and don't fuck up or mention that she looks like you are favorite anime grill

No eurobeat
She brings up anything weird or niche first
Talk about cooking, carpentry, art, literature, or anything that isn't fixing cars/fixing computers. You don't want to go down that road.

>>16464460
what's the first best girl?

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>>16464481

>>16458224
No music, just clean the fucking thing out, jam about 4 Black Ice in there, but take them out when you go to pick her up (having any air fresheners at all will give the impression you smell bad.) Talk about classes because it's a common subject. Don't try to ask her out while you're driving, that'll make shit weird.

>>16464460
>>16464521
Hard to take advice from someone who has a waifu desu senpai. Also your advice sucks. The best thing you can do (assuming you're an introverted autist who has a hard time talking about things not car or computer related much like myself) is talk to her and try to find a topic where she won't shut up, then let her do all the talking

>>16464547
I don't have a waifu, I just like the love lives.

My gf got me into it

>talk to her and try to find a topic where she won't shut up, then let her do all the talking
If you talk to her at all that's inevitable

>>16464460
>anything that isn't fixing cars/fixing computers

This has been my life for the past 10 years. ;_;

>>16458224
>drive up to her house
>reverse into driveway
>remove watch from wrist and place it around steering wheel
>put driving gloves on
>place toothpick in your mouth but a little sticking out
>make sure your scorpion jacket is clean and fresh
>as she walks up to the car reach over and open the door from the inside
>don't say a word
>just look straight ahead
>if she's says anything to you just say "i drive"
>get insta-laid

>>16458224
also make her a bowl of eggs

Take her through the Mc Donalds drive thru for a box of nugs and the sit in Halfords car park for an hour revving your engine.

Seriously though some of these replies are fucking retarded. Just talk about uni seeing as it's the only common subject you have don't try "do you like the fine arts m'lady mhmm and carpentry." Such a blatant show of your desperation to create a new common ground smells of turbotism

>>16458224
Couldn't be worse than my experience I wish you luck OP.

>Car was fucked up and didn't feel like fixing it.
>Have motorcycle.
>QT I had been talking to asks for a lift somewhere
>Show up She comes outside I had her a helmet
>Slap that on
>She stares at me for a little bit
>Goes back inside
>Well that was soul crushingly bad
>Go for a ride to numb the sadness

Guess the bike threw her off. maybe should have told her my car was broken before I went

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>>16464591
"hey anon, thanks for taking me in, it's freezing out!"
"No problem. I was just enjoying pre colonial art before I picked you up, m'lady"

>>16458224
Dont rage when you drive, don't drive like a beta but don't drive like you wanna kill her

Whatever you do.. I just hope you get the pussy son.

>>16464574
How much of the eggs does she have to eat?

>>16464627
All of them

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How'd it go OP? Did you give her the ride yet?

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>>16464618
"Stave your worry madam, m'autowagon has heated seats."

>>16464636
I won't the bowl of eggs sat on the seat when she opens the door

>>16464591
>not exclusively interacting with girls who can match your turbotism

this is why you're a knowitall virgin instead of just a knowitall

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>>16464666
"what are all these chinese swords for, anon?"

You better have gone for the eurobeat

>>16464406
You have to try. It's never going to be like flipping a switch.

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>>16464163
i specifically said it would be better to listen to nothing than something from the chart my man

>>Plot twist, grill is actually goy.
>>Dont worry little buddy, nobody dies a virgin, life fucks us all.
>>WHY WOULD YOU MESSAGE HER ON FAKEBOOK
>>drive past address several times at night to be sure it's her house. Take pics of her snizz through window to confirm, then share them with /o/

R Kelly, bump and grind, on repeat. TRUST ME ON THIS ONE. She will think you have a sense of humor and think you are extremely good at making sex with female humans

>>16465186
yes, i know
im trying to get better

i'm still not nearly normal, but compared to a few years ago i'm a lot better

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>>16464659
>ops face right now because he has no idea what to do with a dead corpse in his trunk

>>16464547
Actual assberger here. I had to learn all this stuff trough lots of thinking and trial and error.

I've made dozens of "friends" just by listening to, and letting people talk.

All I do is nod, basically. And sometimes ask a question to show I'm paying attention.
Don't interrupt the flow of things by talking about yourself or your interests.

But don't feign interest either.
Or you'll get pressured into becoming vegan or painting your nails or going dumpster diving or something. Or even end up hurting the other person's feels.

It sounds dumb but it works.

Find out what she likes and she will want to talk about it.

Social media stalking works.
So is listening to other people talk about the person you're interested in.
People talk about eachother all the time.

Then casually bring up something related to the subject she likes and hope she bites.
I usually do it with an intentionally bad joke.
Just make sure you're not fat or ugly. Girls never laugh at fat and ugly people's jokes.

>>16458259
Kek

>>16464617
>wow nice of your sister to let you borrow her scooter anon
>I was thinking of buying one just like it

Could have been worse.

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>>16458317
A mazda 3

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>>16458341
Supreme gentleman!!

>op if you don't drive any of these three you are fucked.

>>16465249
That's good. Don't worry about what other people are doing. Focus on how you are doing relative to your past self. There is no such thing as normal. I've been chasing after "nornal" for years and I've found that it doesn't really mean anything.

>>16465378
I shouldn't have said normal, but I mean I'm much less assertive than I would personally like to be. I don't really care much about how other people are doing in that respect.

>>16458561
NYMM

>Neck yourself my man

>>16463145
Maybe the women you know are just slobs

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>>16465362
Right in my feels bro. that hurts

Was it like this, op?

https://youtu.be/aqSGWGD9fXg

>>16459215
This.

>>16458224
Just throw her the aux, and keep the conversation going by asking her questions about herself. And chill out.

>>16462919
Kekkkk

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>>16464617
Holy shit.....
R.i.p anon.

>>16465329
This guy gets it

Also just stay calm. If it doesn't work out or you fuck up consider it a learning experience. But if it goes well ask her out within a few days or you will be friendzoned and used for rides. If she's not interested just move on.

>>16465329
Getting your nails painted by a girl is a pretty fun experience. So is getting them to practice their make-up on you.

I wouldn't go vegan or some shit but if a girl is willing to help you achieve trap status you probably aren't far from being balls deep in her.

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>>16465544

>>16465570
Don't knock it until you try it. It's a pretty good way of getting closer to someone and it's a hobby for most girls too.

>>16465713
I have a family and I never had to do that, the worst I've done is let my wife pluck my eyebrows

Yeeeeeah. You're gay.

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>>16465544
Okay...
I'm glad you found a girl who would do this to you.

>>16465713
So basically asking a girl to paint your nails is like a girl asking you to take a look at her car.

You're essentially turning the tables friendzoning her if she agrees.

>>16465756
Not friend zoning
Youre throwing out an invitation to be dommed

>>16465544
lmao I had a lot of friends who were girls back in the school days and Id let them do this shit

thought I was the only one

>>16465770
they talked about you behind your back

>>16465786
I know they did
dont really care

dont keep up with any of them and I had a lot of good times

seriously there were perks to people thinking you were gay

>>16458224
You're gonna want to play this song.
https://youtu.be/9Qmwsg2pyEc

>>16465723
I'm not saying to ask for it. I'm saying if a girl wants to try it there's really no reason to say no.

>>16465756
Again, don't ask for it but don't say no. Not really difficult. I don't actively seek this kind of thing out.

>>16465786
Why do you give a shit about what guys think of you? I certainly don't give a fuck.

>>16458224
Easy.
1. Clean car inside and out
2. Clean self
3. Try to not be abnormal

Just act like you're driving your mom or sister, assuming you're on good terms with them. Talk about school I guess.

>>16465365
if this is your car op then you have already lost. Rust looks ugly to guys and girls

Op, floor it at stale green lights but then smash the brake pedal as it turns yellow. Stick your arm out and grab some booblet but pretend to be concerned about her safety.

Also enable child lock on the door so you have to let her out but before you do pretend like shes stuck in your car forever. It'll be laughs im sure

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This thread is still going hot.

>>16458224
Grills tend to like basic shit like the Strokes, the Cranberries, , etc.

t. I DJ for normies because otherwise they play top 40 shit and everybody leaves their parties

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>>16468141
Hit up Spotify for this playlist, it's effective

>>16468201
>inb4 loud spotify ads
kek

>>16465764
>Youre throwing out an invitation to be dommed
I think its the opposite.

You may think its submissive because painted nails are gay but the service beibg performed has nothing to do with it.

One person is servicing the other, for free.
The servicer is the one getting dominated.

If you fix something small in a girls car or computer you don't look strong or manly in her eyes.
You're just there to do something she never learnt to do herself, likely because there was always a guy to do it for her.

You may not even realize it because are somewhat blinded by the satisfaction of showing off for the girl that you like.

To most girls, painting nails is a hobby and if they like you, they'll jump at the chance to do it.

>>16458224

Record everything on your dash cam and link us the footage. I want to see how you did.

This thread inspired me to rewatch Drive.

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>>16458331

>>16458256
Underrated

Also inb4 OP spends eight hours cleaning and detailing his car, getting flowers and downloading music only to miss school entirely.

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>>16469125
I had a date yesterday. Spent all kinds of time cleaning my car, researched places to make a reservation for dinner, figured out what to wear by asking /fa/.... then she cancelled because she was "sick". She might really be sick, but, the cancellation text kind of sounded like she was cancelling a dental appointment.

>>16458224

Only play trance and hardstyle on the radio

example:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aJkcW-UloFg

>>16469142
she probably thought you two were just hanging out man.

>>16469169
We'll see. I'll ask her out again in a week or so. I get the feeling she doesn't want to anymore though.

One thing I've found asking girls out is sometimes they say "yes" in person when I ask them (I guess because they are caught off guard or feel pressured?), and then it is easier to later say "no" in a text message.

>>16469142
>figured out what to wear by asking /fa/

Least you didn't embarrass yourself

It's been two days, where the fuck is OP

>>16469197
Was kind of funny, /fa/ told me to go to reddit.com/r/malefashionadvice/. I searched that and figured out the answer to my question. The anon said that /fa/ is actually mostly a satire and while there are some helpful people, generally not a place for an adult to get fashion advice. Worked out I guess.

Well..

op probably killed himself after fucking up big time

>>16459233
Yeah I'm sure you'll win in court rofl

>Tfw terrible at actually getting the girls I want to get
>End up treating other girls with nonchalance and indifference and just talking normally and confidently with them
>The girls I don't aim for end up wanting the fug
>Go away from mates for a year and go back for a night out
>Girl I wanted is there but I'm not really paying any attention just feeling a bit weird and out of touch with everyone from working hard for a year
>As the night moves on the girl gets super suggestive and is face raping me
>Says she wants fug but I'd come over from work with no condoms, no shower and was getting a bit weirded out since she'd not shown interest before

girls are weird

>>16469309
You sir had the opportunity with the girl you "wanted" and blew it, which is probably due to your latent homosexuality

>>16469317
Would you feel normal barebacking a girl that had rejected your advances before but suddenly wants full fug after not seeing or talking for over a year no ty.

>>16469334
Yes actually, I would be doing what I was genetically programmed to do, which apparently not how you were programmed, nancyboy

>>16469334
Yes, that's what you do. Condoms are shitty

>>16469334
Yes but I've also not been laid in months

I am lazy so I need to be spoonfed.
Any news from OP?

>>16469369
>Yes, that's what I always let my bull do. Condoms are shitty and my girl doesn't like them.
FTFY cuck

>>16469409
>T. Nobike assmad cuck

>sex before marriage
Get the fuck out you goddamn animals.

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>>16469420
C'mon Carl. That all you can muster up?

>>16461000
this

>>16458224
play super eurobeat
>space boy
>mister blaster

also wear nice sunglasses

dont be an autist

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>>16469743
>play Super Eurobeat
>don't be an autist
Pick one

>>16458224
well, how did it go?

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OP here

HOLY FUCKING SHIT, this thread got a lot of replies

Anyway, I already gave her a ride, shit went pretty well, we talked about uni and classes and professors who were douchebags
I asked her for her phone number and she gave it to me, today i actually sent her another message

>I started out with "hey pretty girl"
>she responded with "hello! how are you anon?"

Then i proceeded to ask her if she wanted me to keep giving her rides and she said that would be great and i said i would see her at her house then but we didnt text anymore

I literally have never been happier in my life /o/

>>16470541
autism is hilarious

>>16470541
You dun good. Now don't fuck it up.

>>16470541
Cute.

>>16465972
You're literally recommending a Seinfeld move

>>16470608
>dun good
>I started out with "hey pretty girl"

shit already went to creepy orbiter autist level

>>16470541
we did it reddit

>>16470541
Awesome anon! Happy for you.

>>16470541
Post a new thread after she makes you drop her at her boyfriend's frat, k?

>>16468375
That's a pretty good point.

>>16470541
The more important question is whether she would be nearly as friendly if there was no reason to be.

You haven't gotten anywhere yet.

>>16471089
>You haven't gotten anywhere yet.
OP is not in his basement he's out driving around chatting up a chick in his car. I'd chalk that up as a win even if it never goes anywhere.

>>16471142
A faint clap of thunder
Clouded skies
Perhaps rain comes
If so, will you stay with me?

File: Gopher It.jpg (189KB, 604x1190px) Image search: [Google]

189KB, 604x1190px

>>16458762
You're just like this story

>>16471192
Ask the grill if she'll let you draw her feet, OP. Guaranteed to get that pussy dripping.

>offers a free ride
>girl accepts
>omg guys I accomplished something

...I dont get the reason for celebrating

>>16471245
fuck you

>>16471202
lol

>>16471249
what

most people arent turning down free rides its not an accomplishment

>>16471206
But actually I really like how Shinkai managed to convincingly capture a scene where something unusual and intimate is happening and no one really knows how to react.

>>16470541
OP,i expect a follow-up post or thread if it goes anywhere.

Don't disappoint me you faggot

>>16463931
>while getting a blowjob
I found your problem m80