f e e l s

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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QXvk-o4RAy4
because we want the last word. If we didn't come back we'd leave someone hanging.
but the thing is: you never knew them enough to get them mad at you for leaving anyway. but then you try and tell people this so you can maybe get someone on a personal level, but that doesn't work because the thread is gone. you hope maybe this one last time you may wake someone up, to change their viewpoint: but this is done by your actions in the public forum. you digress and focus on what you have left after this realization. you have whom you've known and revitalize relationships with. you have your work, you may have friends, but their numbers are lost. it's been a while. talking to them now, would be just an excuse for the holidays you tell yourself. it wouldn't make any sense. who would be up that early? I mean that late... or any time of day? but then you could just find people with common interests and who would want to talk anyway just to pass the time: and if it be someone related so be it. but you've gone to far. the internet has taught you too much to function like anyone else you tell yourself. you're too woke, you know too much, everyone thinks of you as part of a generation anyway. but...
those feels.

you look into the pixels of a laptop screen. you look away. where are you right now you ask...
you are_
miles away.