Royal Guard Mare Thread #29: Didn't Bump Edition

Did the MILFs get you guys or something?

>>30030082
Maybe it died because nobody is allowed to post anything even remotely related to stallion guards?

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>>30030082
>two episodes
>related discussion
>daily shitposting
>normalfags are out because weekend
Threads die all the time. Good thing starting new ones is free. For now

Thread with 2 and a half writefags and at most 30 anon's dieds on a double episode weekend

Fucking shocking

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I shoulda drawn more qt guards to keep the thread alive

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>>30030284
>>30030645
I'll contribute. Guard mares enforcing equality when?

>>30030796
I already know I'm a manlet you fucking horse, stop rubbing it in

>>30030077
Previous thread >>29980540

Whisky updated >>30028626 in case anyone else missed it

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>>30030077
more powerful with males tbhfam

>>30030077
I was honestly surprised we didn't lose one last week as well.

>>30030077
What the hell guardsmen, I go to sleep at my scheduled time and we sage?
>>30031131
Its a double weekend, I wouldn't be surprised if the faggots made new threads under the guise of conversing to stealth bump us off fo not wanting dick.

>>30030882
Good work, >>30030796
that ponice mare is a cute.

Going back to bed, don't let the faggots stealth sage us.

>>30030645
Drunk vannie best vannie. desu our writefags seem to do a lot of drinking.

>>30031164
>made new threads under the guise of conversing to stealth bump us off
This has been discussed in rgre too. There appears to be some faggot who bumps threads strategically so the generals he doesn't like end up on pg10, and then starts a bunch of low-effort, random threads to push them off the board.

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>>30030796
>>30031175
I didn't know we were including cute po-pos.

>>30032184
They do guard people, its just with a different name. And cute tiny hats.

>>30030645
They are so cute just as they are, but if more had armor on it would be easier to use as op.

or if you just drew in her helmet setting on the counter...

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>>30032292
Yeah, I need to stop being lazy and make these mares wear protection

>>30032399
I thank ya bunches.

>>30025137
>...by the time Honor gets back, you're quietly crying.
>You've never cried any other way. Loud sobs just don't come to you.
>Still, anypony can recognize it when you do.
>Your eyes water, and you can't control your breathing except between gasps.
>The shame you feel at Honor seeing you in this state does little to ease you.

"Sorry."
>"No worries. Tiring day. Would you like me to leave?"
"No, n-no. Just... minute..."

>You let yourself cry and wait for your behavior to come back under your control.
>This happens sometimes when you drink, especially on days like this.
>There were moments positive and negative both, today... but there was so much overall you became overwhelmed.
>You never cry sober, so the experience of being able to do so that alcohol gives you is cathartic.
>It erodes some unwanted wall in your brain and lets all the Safe leak out.
>It's a release for exhaustion and fatigue, physical and mental, the same way you've found orgasm to relieve stress and tension.
>You'd prefer not to have that happen on front of your ranking officer either.

"I'm..."
>You manage to steady your breath.
"I'm good now."
>"I'm glad. Anything more I can do?"
"I couldn't ask any more-"
>"Nonsense. Let me at least..."
>Honor's horn flickers.
>Your corner woodstove flickers, its fuel set alight.
>The room seems immediately to warm.
>Honor smiles.
>"I won't insist on anything else. Sorry."
"It's fine. I actually would have forgotten..."
>"Right."

>>30032556
"I'm humbled that you would... well, spend time..."
>"Oh, it's nothing. I always like helping my guard... uh."
>She seems to want to correct herself.
>"I don't want to come off wrong! I don't have a precinct-mommy complex or anything. Some of the captains I meet at the regional meetings do that. It's... weird."
>She scratches the back of her head in the firelight.
>She might be blushing.
>"I just... you all give Canterlot a lot, and you give me a lot. I just want to repay it. Maybe get back my balance of friend-duty to guard-duty while I'm at it..."

>That was more of an outpouring than you expected.
"...Oh. Well."
>This might be turning into an 'awkward silence.'
>You've never felt awkward in any silence, but you understand other ponies don't like just... looking at each other.
"I suppose you'll have fewer problems with that. Since you know where I live now."

>You didn't intend it as a joke, but Honor laughs and laughs.
>You sip your water, chat with her a little more, and tuck yourself in as she goes on her way, magicking your front door's lock shut behind her.
>You promptly fall asleep, the images of her, Careful, Moondancer, and Anon all lingering in your head.
>It's been a hard day, but a good one.

>>30032557
awww honer is such a nice pony. Being so sweet to her. It good to have friends is high places.

Man. If Safety never really feels awkward. Maybe the next time she sees Honer will be a new experience for her. Assuming she remembers anything.

>>30032399
>>30030796
You Anons never cease to impress me. I wish I had an ounce of your talent.

Sorry, I was not able to help keep watch today. I had to deal with some family shit IRL.

>sorta related to a topic in the last thread
A sign of a good friend is a friend who'll help you move.

>>30032557
>>30032604
>>30032856
This was super cute. Glad her Captain is keeping a careful watch on her

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>>30032954

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>>30030077
Reporting to duty bump!

>>30032399
What kind of beer would Vannie drink?

>>30034527
Vannie wouldn't drink "beer", aka piss water, she's better than that. She's definitely a vodka and gin girl.

>>30034527
>>30034910
well the last time they got drunk i was on a bunch of fruity girly drinks

if she has to drink beer it would probably be something super light.

>>30035239
blue moon

>>30035288
roling rock

>>30035363
>>30035239
>>30035288
>>30034910
So what would be each guard mare's preferred drink?

>>30035888
Rewind would need some strong stuff after what she went through

>>30036543
except she's still going through it, and will continue to forever because the story's never going to get finished

Who's got a bump script running on this thread then?

>>30037439
Ok, I usually ignore these but how can I say now to a cutie batmare.

"I love you little pone."

>>30037439
I love you little pone.

>>30036998
So a neverending hypothetical spiral into alcohol-fueled depression then?

>>30037439
I hope this is true
I love you little pone

>>30018969
>“Damwall” and “city-planning” were two phrases that didn’t go together.
>Especially as industry spread its iron girders and gantries, the city was always growing chaotically.
>Buildings were never really demolished, just renovated, and built on top of until streets were squeezed in between them as an afterthought.
>Electric rail cars, an emerging novelty before the Plague, only ran in the most regal and at least partially thought out districts.
>It had made for some interesting chases in your guard career, experience that proved its worth tonight.
>After carefully leaving your room, you make your way to the roof of the next tenement.
>With hardly a meter between each building, trotting along the rooftops and clearing the gaps between is almost second nature.
>Well, for you anyway.
>There was that one Blinder Gang member who’d split during a sting.
>That mare could run; she led you halfway across the city, 8 stories off the ground.
>She didn’t know the layout like you though, and found empty air where an explosion had recently leveled a chemical-works.
>You didn’t kill her.
>She just jumped without looking.
>You clear the thought from your head as you leap to yet another roof, slowing to a canter.
>Rutshore Waterfront, no more rooftops.
>The Roanhaven River stretches before you, its wide lazy bends cutting the city in two as it wends to the sea.
>The waters are empty beneath the cloudy night sky, save for the single dim spotlight of a River Patrol boat chugging slowly upriver.
>You’re more interested in the hulking iron monstrosity that straddles the two shores, looming in the dark like a vast skeleton.
>Coltwin’s Bridge had undergone several changes throughout its life.
>Originally a simple causeway of stone arches to link the two halves of the city, shops and apartments sprang up along its length to attract travelers as they crossed.

>>30039668
Aaaand I've got a "connection error" and am stuck mobile posting now. Any advice?

>>30039741
Connection error happens with longer posts, so split it into a bajillion pieces I guess.

>>30039741
its been happening to others posting green as well.
try breaking the posts into smaller parts, some guys were saying it may just be one bad string that stops it so smaller posts let you find that, its some kind of sever bug

>>30039668
>More recently, the whale oil boom meant that large ships had to travel upriver to the refineries.
>The middle of the bridge, where the channel was deepest, was knocked down, and a massive mechanical drawbridge had taken its place.
>Huge gears and pulleys lifted the middle section of the street between the towers on either side of the bridge whenever the ships steamed through, and the shriek and groan of metal could be heard up and down the waterway.
>You observe the bridge from your perch atop a workhouse.
>Guards are posted at the entry to the bridge, a situation you knew, through talk within the Watch, would be mirrored on the other side.

>>30039797
>Patrols would certainly be making rounds along its length; curfew was heavily enforced on the bridge at night, it being one of few places to cross the river without getting wet.
>Fortunately, you know a shortcut.
>A maintenance catwalk stretches along the bridge’s underside, inaccessible until after you pass the checkpoint, and therefore, likely unguarded.
>You pick your way carefully down from the roof, finding a fire escape on an adjacent building and hopping across.
>Peering from a nearby alley, you observe the scene.
>A guard hut is positioned in the middle of the street leading onto the bridge.
>Two Watch guards stand warming themselves by an improvised barrel stove, while their officer is poring over something in the hut.
>This shouldn’t be too hard.

>>30039817
>After searching the alley, you peek back around at the outpost, empty liquor bottle in hoof.
>Neither guard is really keeping an eye on their surroundings, and you cross to the wall along the riverfront, gambling that they won’t look too hard left or right when you make your move.
>Edging as close to the gate as you dare, socks keeping your hooves from echoing on the broken cobblestone, you freeze and heft the bottle.

>>30039833
>You’re close enough to hear the guards conversing.
>One of them asks the other how old his sister is, getting his answer in the form of a hoof to the side of his helmet.
>You take the opportunity and throw the bottle high, watching it arc into the darkness across the street.
>It breaks unseen with a ringing that shatters the stagnant river air, and a cat screeches angrily.

>>30039836
>The two guards jump, hooves immediately going to their swords.
>“The hell?”

>>30039861
>“Bottle Street boys,” exclaims one, charging confidently into the gloom.
>“I told you I’d wring your damn necks if you came back ‘round here!”

>>30039870
>His companion eagerly joins in pursuit; obviously, they’ve some bone to pick with the nonexistent trespasser.
>Well, the trespasser is real.

>>30039881
Fucking Christ this is annoying. I'm done for the night.

>>30039881
>Well, the trespasser is real.
>She’s just not over there.
>By now the officer, a very upset looking sub-lieutenant, has stumbled from the hut to find his squad members gone.
>“Corporal? Corporal wait it’s not – damnit.”
>He hurries off after them, swearing and struggling to secure his harness around himself.
>You can’t quite believe if you’re lucky or if this particular squad is as fresh as their officer.
>That went better than planned; no time to question it.
>You emerge from the shadows and pass the guard hut before thinking better of it.
>Might be something useful in there.
>You grumble at yourself as you slink into the hut and make a quick search of the drawers in its desk.
>A key is buried under a stack of old logbooks and notices, with no markings to clue you in on its purpose.

>>30039741
Try completing the captcha before posting, tends to help me when I have a large post to do.

>>30040041
>Still, you shove it hastily in a pocket and rush outside again, ducking into the shadows between a couple of closed shops.
>At the end of the alley is a gate in the bridge wall, a stone staircase leading downward along the wall.
>You make your way down the path, and it quickly turns into the metal catwalk you sought.
>A metal barrier blocks you from continuing under the bridge, and you bring out the pilfered key.
>It’s a perfect fit, and the door swings open.

>>30040052
>You close and lock it behind you, not wanting to leave too much of a trail, and examine the way forward.
>The catwalk hangs by metal struts reaching from the underside of the bridge.
>It looks unnervingly flimsy, and you can hear the babble of the river far below as it swirls past the bridge’s piers.
>Swallowing hard, you make your away across at a walking pace, not willing to risk anything faster.

>>30039891

>One of them asks the other how old his sister is.
Kek, blow off choffer.

I don't blame you, right now the whole sistem for posting green has gone to trash.

>>30040061
>Fortunately your suspicions were confirmed; there are no guards down here.
>Eventually you reach the other side and find an identical door, opening it with the same ease.
>You return to street level and sneak through the alleys, looking for another bottle.
>You find one, this time a discarded wine bottle, its label suggesting the previous owner was either wealthy or a thief, and silently approach the end of the bridge.

>>30040071
>Again, two guards and an officer are in the way.
>The officer is currently berating one of the guards.
>Something about a sloppy uniform being a reflection of one’s character, and subsequently, that of his superiors.
>Their backs are to you, but you won’t be able to approach any further until they are distracted; a couple of streetlights bathe the checkpoint in their light.
>Getting this bottle all the way to the other side of the street is going to take a little extra oomph.

>>30040079
>As the grilling continues ten yards ahead of you, you step into the street and gird yourself.
>With a couple steps-worth of a running start, you heave the bottle through the air and frantically dive for cover behind the stoop of an apartment building.
>A distant crash signifies that you’ve hit the mark, and you lay your ears flat to take a peek.
>The officer has gone silent, peering intently into the darkness across from him.
>He raises a hoof and signals to the guards, a mare and a stallion, directing them to advance.

>>30040084
>The three walk into the street and pause, ears swiveling for sound.
>This is as good as it’s going to get, you guess.
>The gap between the seawall and the left-side guard is the largest, and you make for it, crouching and treading as quietly as you can.
>Almost there…

>>30040092
>You make it behind the mare and are creeping along the seawall when your blood turns to ice.
>“Hey! You, stop right there!”
>You don’t turn around to find out which one spotted you.

>>30040104
>You’ve never been on this end of the scenario before.
>You panic.
>Fear taking full control, your frantic eyes pick out the nearest alleyway and you lunge toward it.

>>30040112
>Suddenly, you are fully enclosed in darkness, the voices of the Watch ponies far behind you.
>“What in the Void?”
>“Where’d she go?”
>Now you turn around.

>>30040121
>You are in the alley.
>The wall you were just pressed against is a solid twenty yards behind you.
>What in the Void, indeed.
>Another one of the Outsider’s gifts?

>>30040126
>You rush the rest of the way down the alley, snagging a fire escape and clambering to the top, in case the guards decided to make a thorough search.
>When you reach the rooftop, you look upriver.
>Bulwark’s Cannery isn’t far now.
>You try to remember what happened in the street below.

>>30040139
>The extreme focus you felt as you made up your mind to bolt into that alley.
>Looking across to the adjacent roof, you focus on it, imagining yourself on the other side, and tense your muscles as if to jump.
>Your vision blurs, and when it clears you find yourself in the middle of the roof, no clattering of hooves as you land, as if you’ve been standing there all along.
>This, this could be fun.

>>30040147
Ok, now I'm really done. Hate leaving an update unfinished. I'll add it to the pastebin for anyone who wants to read it in a less autistic format.

>>30040147
I want to cuddle the gifted little mare.

>>30032557
Thanks for the update CW. Hopefully Safe gets a restful sleep.

>>30040147
Your short updates and slow speed anger me, but this yarn of yours delights me.

Anon as the (Possible) sidekick is neat.

>>30040368
Can't rush perfection, or lazy sacks of shit. Glad you're enjoying it.
>>30040185
More cuddles and maybe more mares in the future.

The shitposting is real today

>>30040147
Good update Whiskey despite the posting issues.
I found the one-shot you put in the last tread intriguing. Do you plan on continuing that one? Maybe after you finish 'Whiskey and Cigars'?

>>30040147
damn that must be a real pain in the ass to post like that.

hopefully it is just a glitch that will go away soon and not trolls getting the mods to think fan fiction is bad some how.

>>30040147
Blink is THE shit.

Bone charms when?

bump 7
going to sleep. See ya'll tomorrow.

>>30042187
night

>>30042222
The best night I've ever seen

>>30041113
That's a possibility. I hadn't given much thought about where to take that one, so I'd have to come up with something. I'll be done with school here in a few days, so after that I'll probably be able to update more often.

>>30040777
>more mares
I CAN'T HOLD ALL THESE WAIFUS

>>30042981
time to choose then
http://www.strawpoll.me/12921628

>>30042222
Nice quads.

>>30042465
I don't think I've seen this cutie before. She looks like she could be Careful's or Brave's younger cousin. She's just joined the RG wanting to follow in her cousin's hoofsteps. No, wait. As I gaze at her visage I feel she's more likely Safety's cousin. Long has she admired Safety First but the adoration is lost on our favorite pegasus guard mare. Safety just thought that it was a phase the little filly was going through. Until Safety spots Autumn Breeze stepping out of the RG Boot barracks dressed for hoof-to-hoof combat training.
>"Huh, I guess it wasn't a phase after all."

Ok, I better stop there before I dream up yet another story idea I don't have time to write.

>>30042827
Excellent. I hope this past school year broadened your horizons and expanded your knowledge. The one-shot stands on its own fairly well yet left plenty of room for further exposition.

>>30043009
UGH! You're killing me. Don't make me choose. I love them all.

>>30043288
>>30042465

are you really that far up your own ass you can't see that's a shity stallion OC?

>>30043631
Why would we know its a stallion OC? Just make it a mare cause it looks like one.

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>>30043646

endorsement of some hot trap action if ever I heard it, I'm down for Anon getting a surprise dick in the face and then licking every sweaty musky inch

>30043673
>Some faggot ignoring making it a female because it looks like one
>Wants to keep it a trap for no reason.
No. Bad faggot, go be a parasite elsewhere.

>>30043673
What part of, "your only going to get a dick when its balls deep in hot mare depths", did you faggots not understand?

>>30043699
>>30043686
>>30043646

you guys refugees from >>traptickler ?
because your singing their theme song
>its not gay if they look like a mare

>>30043741
....are you just sleep deprived and couldn't see the screen clearly? Because literally none of those posts are for having a trap/gay shit. Unless your this guy>>30043673
and your just acting retarded to try and...I don't even know what you would be trying to do here. The faggots we have shitposting, and apparently trap thread is dropping in too for some damn reason($5 says that the faggot general started trying to get more dicks from them), are not very smart(see the definition of retarded).

Meh, Just ignore the Mr.B8R. Even if it was obviously a stallion (which it is not) I would still make the green / prompt about a mare because...it's about Royal Guard Mares ITT.

>1:33 am
>My name is Midnight Bloom and I am one of Princess Luna’s personal guards.
>it is a few minutes before my shift and I am getting into the rest of my uniform.
>I work alongside SGT. Stalwart Stance, one of Princess Celestia's personal guards.
>I don’t really understand why I was selected to be a guard.
>Just a few weeks ago I ran a small flower shop in Canterlot, but for some reason, I was requested to try out as a night guard.
>What scares me is not only did I pass, I was selected to work as Princess Luna’s personal guard.
>To be completely honest, I'm not even sure how I've been kept on for so long.
>Back when I was supposed to get my orders, I think Princess Luna assumed, because I was a Bat Pony, I would be more nocturnal.
>I don’t blame her, but because I used to run a flower shop I was more a day pony.
>So I kinda, sorta fell asleep during my 3:00 am orientation meeting.
>Because of that I feel I might have been doing a poor job, and I always feel like everypony is watching me for mistakes.

I don't mind a guard stallion who looks like a mare.

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>>30044300
Too bad this thread is just for Guardmares.

>>30044234
Did you just assume my sleep schedule preferences?

>>30044347
And that no other guard threads are allowed.

>>30044234
>11:47 am
>I slip on the rest of my custom armor.
>It is fairly standard night guard armor complete with helmet, but the back plate is left open to accommodate an addition to my uniform.
>For some reason, as part of our job, SGT. Stalwart and I are required to wear diapers.
>While I really don’t understand the details thanks to my nap the first day, I am actually pretty happy with this arrangement.
>While the pay is great, the hours are a bit odd and we can be called on to take any shift at any time. >So, SGT. Stalwart and I tend to um… use them occasionally. Okay, no. I lied. We need them, like, every shift.
>I mean, not that I am exactly complaining or anything…
>I finish placing my greaves on and proceed out the changing room to take my post.

>>30044371
>12:00 pm
>Today, I have to work from twelve to ten.
>I am actually pretty happy because this lets me sleep in.
>As I arrive at my post, I look over to see STG. Stalwart standing by his station, diligently.
>Even with his diaper on, he always looks so cool. Unlike me, he always seems to be on top of things and so confident.
>Walking up next to him, I say good morning like I do every day.
>He, as always, responds by smiling and nodding at me.
>He is very serious about his job, but he is always so nice to me.
>He then returns to his firm stance and serious demeanour.
>Seeing him diapered like that, he looks really cute. Too bad I have to work. I stand up next to him, take a similar stance, and wait for the princesses to arrive.

>>30044371
>Neat idea
>diapers
get out, don't come back.

>>30044380
>1:30 pm
>After standing for over an hour, the princesses finally arrive, and we bow.
>They always look so refined as they arrive.
>Princess Celestia and Princess Luna always ask each of us how we are doing. After talking for a bit, they then proceed into the room.
>I am not too sure, but I think I shouldn't glance inside as they enter. I really don’t know what the room we are guarding even looks like.
>To be honest, I actually have no clue what I am even guarding.
>To make matters worse, since my rank is so high and this assignment is restricted, the only other ponies that know what I am doing is are the princesses and SGT. Stalwart.
>So, I have yet to work up the nerve to ask anypony what I am supposed to do.
>I just hope that as long as I do what he does, everything will work out for the best.
>It is the strangest thing, though; whenever that door opens or closes I always smell this sweet perfume.
>I would ask SGT. Stalwart but he never seems to notice, so I’d rather not bother him.

>>30044391
>3:30 pm
>It was now half past three and the day guards were beginning their rotation.
>When I first started this job I was afraid about all the ridicule I would get for wearing a diaper in public, but everypony has been very nice.
>As they walk by, they always salute us, and no pony stares or anything.
>At first, I was afraid it would be really embarrassing, but the way everypony treats us, I am certain whatever we're guarding must be really important.
>It makes me really proud doing this, but STG. Stalwart is always so serious with this job.
>He never smiles at any of the guards that pass by.
>Maybe I should try to act more like him… I stop to take a look at him; he looks lost in thought.
>seeing him without his serious face looks so strange.
>Wow, he really does look super cute in his diaper.
>I tried to turn away, but I couldn’t help but take one more look at him. I, um… better get back to guarding my post.

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What's going on in this thr-

>>30044780
Just some trash crawling around. Same procedure as the faggots on this one.

>>30044858
>It's only trash if it's something -I- don't like

Homosexuality is a mental illness

>>30044895
Just like lesbianism is.

>>30044858
>fag rage anon also hates diapers

I see, so you were still in diapers when your uncle touched your no no place, and now you associate both diapers and homosexual emotions with that event.

You should know it wasn't your fault Anon and you can't let this unreasonable hate and anger ruin your life.

>>30044880
>implying diapers and faggots are liked literally anywhere outside of trash
There's a reason you pieces of garbage only thrive at the bottom of bin.
>30044937
no (you) for you, try again with better bait.

>>30045028
>I must start arguing with everyone who likes things that -I- don't like because I'm unable to simply ignore it
You really are a self-centered asshole.

>>30045028
ain't b8 m8

you seem to have some real issues that need addressing man, have you thought about therapy?
I know there's a lot of stigma around it but they can help, just talking things over can be a great relief

Reminder to not reply to the bait posters, just report and ignore. That means you antifag guy, they aren't trying to hide it. Don't play their game.

>>30045101
He says while shitposting in every single guard thread that doesn't have a "Mares only"-rule in the OP.

>>30044397
theres more to this ?

>>30045245
Go to trash, they would have this shit. Unless your the faggot that made it and your just responding to yourself. Which would result in the same response, get out and go to the trash heap with the rest of the filth.

>>30044397
This is weird, yet also kinda funny in a way.

>>30040147
>Your left arm hurts like a motherfucker.
>The bullet had grazed you, digging a deep furrow through the upper arm and costing you a lot of blood.
>When that Watch pony had passed out, she crashed to the floor, her hoof sliding through the trigger guard of her pistol and squeezing the trigger while it was still pointed in your general direction.
>You managed a tourniquet with a strip of your cloak, one of the few human-sized garments you’d come across that fit your anatomy decently.
>Could have been worse.
>It could have killed you.

>>30045552
>You glance around your abode, thinking darkly that it might have been an improvement.
>Ever since you’d fled Coltridge prison, you hadn’t talked to a single being, other than that guard mare.
>From the Empress’s court to abandoned, collapsing and Plague-ridden factories.
>Fine banquets to… whatever is in the can you’re heating over your jerry-rigged fire ring.

>>30045563
>Whale, maybe, though from what you’d seen there were no real regulations on the burgeoning meat industry in this city.
>Something something Upton Sinclair.
>Good going, Anon, this is so much better than Equestria.

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>>30045552
>>30045563
>>30045572
Good.
The shitposting can finally end and we all can just enjoy some delicious smoky greens.

>>30045572
>You’ve been thinking about the events of the last day.
>Your failed attempt to communicate with the Outsider; one of countless others.

>>30045552
Just type original form in the options space, that should let you make full posts. Some guys in incest figured the trick out.

>>30045588
>Bits of bone weren’t hard to come by, and you’d read countless books at the Academy of Natural Philosophy on charms, runes and everything surrounding them.

>>30045590
No such luck. My first post I can fit 5-6 lines. After that it drops to 3-4 until eventually I'm posting 1 line at a time. Wonder how diaper guy managed it.

>>30045607
>But no.
>They have no song to sing to you, no heat or coolness to greet your fingers when you touch them.
>Maybe humans are just immune to their influence.
>Or maybe it really is a bunch of nonsense, like some at the Academy propose, behind closed doors and with a bit of spirits between them.

>>30045641
>No.
>You know it’s real.
>You saw how that mare reacted to your rune, the fear in her eyes before they rolled back in her head.
>How she collapsed at a simple touch.
>You’re still an idiot for telling her where to find you.

>>30045654
>She is a Watch officer, and she’ll probably be along any day now with a battalion to run you down.
>Another day, that’s all.
>Then you pack up and move.
>Again.

>>30045709
>A distant thud rolls through the streets below, echoing over the whistle of wind through the factory’s decrepit windows.
>Sounds like an explosion.

>>30045721
>You’d gotten pretty good at setting traps since your escape.
>Slow down your pursuers and notify you of their presence, give you a chance to pack up and move to a new hideout.

>>30045730

>Well, decently good, anyway; the mare figured out the bottle-under-the-window easily enough.
>You stand from the fire and whip an oil cloth over the top, quickly smothering it.

>>30045745
>You stand from the fire and whip an oil cloth over the top, quickly smothering it.
>You had taken to sleeping during the day, using the cover of night to eat and move about, since you’re twice the height of anyone else in the city and aren’t exactly inconspicuous.

>>30045755
>A pistol lifted from an inattentive guard post sits on a nearby filing cabinet, and you move to retrieve it.
>The weapon is awkward to hold, its trigger guard far too large and allowing your entire hand to rest on the oversized trigger.

>Cutting the story up into hundreds of tiny little pieces and taking up a ton of posts like this
Are you retarded?

>>30045630
Guess he knew how to correctly pad his posts HA

>>30045771
>Stupid thing didn’t even have a safety.
>Otherwise your arm would probably be fine.
>You stalk to one of the windows, cocking the pistol with your bad arm before raising it beside your head.

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>>30045782
Are you?
You know there's some sort of glitch where you can't post large greentexts, right?

>>30045782
Stubborn
>>30045788
And new. What do you mean.

>>30043009
>nobody likes autistic birbpone
Saddening.

>>30045799
Diaper humor

>>30045799
Hey, respect to you for the effort of trying to get a decent post Whiskey, thanks

My only idea would be to try a different browser with a cleared cache

>>30045790
>Somewhere in the depths of the city, a clocktower chimes twelve.
>It’s hiiiigh noon.
>Midnight, whatever.
>You press against the wall, peering carefully around the window’s edge to see what might be waiting below.
“I’ll be damned…”
>You whisper to yourself.
>Below you is a small sand-colored mare with a black mane, wrapped snuggly in a long gray jacket.
>She’s facing the building across the street, as if hesitating to go inside.
>Or pick out the best way to do so.
>The name above the entryway is still visible, though the damp air of the city had corroded the paint.
>“Bulwark’s Cannery”
>You slowly rotate into the window, bringing the pistol to bear as best you can with one arm.
>Mustering a commanding voice, you call down to the mare.
“Don’t move.”

>>30045880
Bam. [original form] worked.
>>30045880
>>30045590
Thanks for the advice anons, that's finally it for this update.

>>30045814
Spagettipone needs love

>>30018426
>While Brave blushes from all the compliments Anon's giving her, you spin around and look again.
>Find something that he'll approve of.
>-No wait, that's just what he told you NOT to do!
>You're shopping for yourself, here!
>...You'll just probably never use these things by yourself.
>How would you, anyways?
>The little bell on the door rings, and somepony walks in.
>Like everything is just subtly trying to take your mind off the task at hoof.
>With a hoof on your chin, you hope the philosophical pose will help you think better.
>"HEY, MOTHERFUCKER!"
>Your ears perk up, and you watch Anon sprinting towards that pony.
>And right before he goes through the door, you see the bag of bits and the boxes of cookies he's carrying.
>And at the same time, he sees the glint in your armor.
>His whole expression falls.
>Oh, you better be scared.
>You and Brave bolt after him at the same time.
>And knowing Brave's the better runner, you quickly hold the door open for her, then follow suit.
>But the second you go outside, you watch Anon yank the stallion's tail and tackle him.
>"GIVE ME MY FUCKING COOKIES!"
>They tumble into the ground, and almost immediately, he's got him pinned.
>The stallion struggles, but clearly can't go anywhere.
>Anon doesn't even look like he notices the struggling.
>-He's not even using both arms to hold him!
>And it's an EARTH PONY!
>You watch as two nearby guards walk up to them both.
>...Oh, right, you forgot you're a guard, too.
>-Well, you're off duty, anyways.
>Just means less paperwork for you.
>The second Anon gets off, the stallion tries to bolt, and the two guards pile on top of him.
>They clearly have trouble holding him down, though.
>Anon simply holds him down again while the two perform the arrest.
>Oh mare, he's so strong...
>-OH HAY.
>You quickly bring your tail in and slowly back up into the store.
>Brave does the same, and you both share a look.
>No words need to be said.
>The shame is clearly mutual.

>>30030284
threads never die
they just go to hell to regroup

>>30046101
Thanks for the update Whiskey. We appreciate your tenacity.

>>30047148
Aww, flustered Guard Mares. Thanks for the update Blu.

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>>30045814
You tricked me. I was gonna vote for Carfull but went for birdpone and that's only because its too cruel to chose between Vanni and Brave.

>>30043009 that damn straw poll is an affront to them all and should never have existed.

>>30047762
And then the strawpoll split the guardsmare general into factions, plunging them into an endless war

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>>30047801
>"War. War never changes."

>>30047860
>In the Age of Shitposting, the general was unformed, shrouded by bait
>A land of Anons, copypasta, and everlasting bumps
>But then there were writefags
>And with writefags, came guardsmares
>Blu, and Careful
>Secto, and Whiskey
>And of course, pones, and bats
>Then from the green, they came
>And found the stories of pone within the green
>Brave, the first of the guards
>Vannie, and her nights of bats
>Careful Watch, and her faithful fans
>And the furtive Rewind, so easily forgotten
>With the strength of writefags, they challenged the bumps
>Careful's mighty cute, peeled apart their stone emotions
>Vannie weaved great bat-love
>Brave unleashed a miasma of hugs and cuddles
>And Solemn Rain betrayed the pastes
>And the bumps were no more
>Thus began the Age of Royal Guard Mare General
>But soon the greens will fade
>And only bumps will remain

>>30047148
I really have not read enough rgre stuff to have any idea how this will play out.


>>30046101
Nice big posts for you both. Hopefully no one will have to suffer though that again any time soon. Thanks for persevering.

>>30045782
Kill yourself

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>>30048042

Nice

>>30030077
>Here lies Gayanon, he never scored.

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>>30047148
>raised tails
>IN PUBLIC
HOW LEWD
CONTROL YOURSELVES MARES

>>30048042
Why does Dark Souls make everything sound so damn cool?

>>30047148
While as hot as getting turned on is for Anon, this motherfucker just tried to steal some bitching cookies, priorities ladies.

>>30049279
Stealing cookies? To the dungeons.

>>30047148
Why would random stallion x come into a stores that clearly has two ponies, guard ponies at that! and a damn huge alien and think "yeah this is the time to rob this store oh and free cookies"
Like what?

>>30049879
They are really good cookies.

>>30049879
>>30049892
and most petty criminals aren't too bright. probably didn't even bother to take a better look at the surroundings. Eyes only on the bag 'o bits and cookies.

>>30049879
He didn't level perception

>>30044397
>7:21 pm
>I have about two and a half hours before my shift it over.
>Too bad I really, really, really, need to go to the bathroom.
>I might have been working here for a few weeks now and I should be used to it, but it's kinda hard when it's ‘that’ thing.
>Wetting my diaper really isn’t a problem for me; actually, I am a bit amazed this one isn’t wet already.
>Messing it's a bit more… ARGH!
>The worst part is that STG. Stalwart is right here next to me and will notice.
>I am getting red just thinking about it.
>Maybe if I ignore it, it will go away until after I can change out of this diaper.
>Just need to keep my focus.

>>30050162
>7:38 pm
>Okay, yeah. It didn’t work for as long as I hoped it would.
>Ugh! Gotta keep holding!
>Gotta keep holding!
>I keep shifting from side to side, trying desperately to keep myself from using my diaper.
>Why does this have to happen to me, of all ponies?
>In all my time working with SGT. Stalwart, he has never done anything like that in his diaper.
>I-I can’t do it in front of him. I need to keep holding on.
>I can feel the heat and pressure building up and my face getting redder.
>As I move my left hooves back I could hear a distinct hissing.
>Shocked, I stopped myself. I did NOT just do that without even noticing.
>Quickly placing my hoof on the padding, I find it still dry.
>Wait, if I didn’t, then?
>I turn towards SGT. Stalwart and notice his diaper now had a distinct yellow tint to it.
>Looking over at him, I could see he was looking away and his face was red.
>This was the first time I've ever seen him look embarrassed.
>Usually, my diaper is wet way before him, so he must feel awkward being the only one.
>Wow, he is too cute!
>Well, it looks like there is no point in me being embarrassed of doing something STG. Stalwart can, and has, done.
>Looking away, I begin to concentrate.
>I try to not make it obvious, what I am doing.
>After a bit of pushing, I can feel my tail lift up and the warm mess begins to enter my diaper.
>I hear the crinkling of the diaper as it pushes out to accommodate my mess.
>It feels like an eternity before it finally stops.
>When I am done with a long deep exhale, I look over to see SGT. Stalwart looking away.
>He is so nice, to try and give me some privacy so I don’t feel too embarrassed.

>>30050168
>Suddenly, an odd idea crosses my mind.
>Making sure he isn’t looking, I press my hoof into the back of my diaper.
>My eyes go wide as I realize just how foreign this new sensation is.
>I should be disgusted, standing with my own mess pressed against me, but for some reason, this feels amazing.
>Then, I'm filled with thoughts of SGT. Stalwart standing next to me in his wet diaper.
>I wet my diaper a lot on the job, but now I think I may have actually been enjoying it more than I was letting myself believe.
>The thought of him being there next to me in his wet diaper is starting to get to me.
>There must be something really wrong with me, but I am really loving this part of my job.
>I can only smile as I look away. Just two more hours next to him.

>>30050175
Get out shit lover, trash is the other direction.

>>30050186
don't reply. just report and ignore.

bump before going back to work. I'll try to keep checking via phone.
pg 6

>>30050175
there is literaly a diaper pony thread in trash, they would probably even appreciate this
unless you are doing it to fuck with us
>>9169363

>>30050536
Dude there's 30 anons in this thread, if not one of them comes to save it while you're busy it deserves to die

>>30046087
>The mare’s ears swivel in your direction, perked and alert, but she complies.
>She’s alone, or appears to be.
“Anyone come with you?”
>“No.”
>Her soft voice betrays nothing.
“Were you followed?”
>“Not to my knowledge.”
>A little something that time.
>Sass?
>Not the answer you were hoping for, but beggars can’t be choosers.
>Neither can two-legged, freakishly tall fugitives wanted for assassination of rulers.
“Alright, turn around. Slowly.”
>The mare rotates and looks up at you, eyes flicking over the dilapidated factory that currently serves as your home.
>“Bulwark’s Cannery is across the street.”
>You shrug, wincing at the pain that shoots through your left arm and keeping the gun trained on the mare.
>She’s unarmed, or whatever the equivalent would be in pony terminology.
“Being careful never hurts. Wait there.”
>A doorway on the second floor leads to a loading platform overhanging the street.
>The winch and the pallet hanging from it were the only way into the factory from the street, once you collapsed a crate of cans in front of the main entry, and you doubt many knew about the sewer access below.

>>30051593
>You drop the control lever, sending the pallet down to the street as the winch squeals distressingly.
>As it thuds to the ground, you motion with your pistol for the mare to climb aboard.
>Her eyes shift back and forth between you and the pallet, and she draws a deep breath before slowly pacing onto the wooden platform.
>The winch groans again, and soon you are standing face-to-face, more or less, with the pony that nearly killed you.
>She barely comes up to your waist.
>Now what.
>The wind whistles hollowly through the street, and you shuffle your feet, keeping the gun on her.
>The pony simply stares at you with her gray-blue eyes, as if sizing you up.
>She looks equal parts nervous and confused.
“Uh, you can go inside, now. Just don’t try anything.”
>The mare nods slightly, edging past you and onto the platform before entering your hideout.
>You stay a few paces behind her, pistol ready, not really sure what comes next.
>Why the hell did you not think this out earlier?
>You suppose you were just too excited at the prospect of finding someone who could hear the runes.
>That’s as good a place as any to start.
“Grab a seat if you want, I’ll see about getting the fire restarted.”
>There’s some matches in the filing cabinet, and as the mare sits hesitantly on the floor you glance quickly to its drawers.
>Ah, there they are.
“Now, what happened when y- “

>>30051609
> She’s gone.
>Your gun is pointing at empty air where she was sitting a split second ago.
“Fuck.”
>A familiar mechanical click sounds behind you.
>“Just don’t try anything.”
>You freeze, having no desire to get shot again.
>“Put the pistol on the ground and take three steps forward.”
>Not much of a choice.
>You bend slowly, placing the weapon on the floor.
>You’re not exactly a bad shot, and you admittedly have seen far too many Clint Eastwood movies.
>But you are Anonymous, not the Man with No Name.
>Taking your three steps, you wait for her next command.
>A scuffing noise tells you that she’s picked up your pistol, and again there comes the sound of a weapon cocking.
>Wait a minute.
>“Turn around slowly and sit down.”
>When you come about, the pony is standing in the doorway by the platform.
>One forehoof is pointing your pistol at you, the other is just coming down from the winch lever.
>It clicks into rest from the “up” position, the winch staying silent thanks to its safety cutoff.
>God fucking damn it.
>You groan quietly as you slump to the floor, dejectedly folding your legs.
“So now what? Am I being detained?”
>The mare takes a step closer, determination now filling her gaze.
>“You’re going to tell me everything, and I mean everything, about you.”

>>30051621
All I got for now. Going to be a busy few days coming up, so the updates may be short.

>>30051639
Nuts.

We'll keep the light on.

>>30051639
thanks for the update Whiskey, this ain't the fastest thread so going slow is no biggie, you finished them finals?

>>30051639
Thanks for the cliffhanger-y update Whiskey. Looking forward to the next one.

>>30051809
It's likely his finals then celebratory booze that will occupy his coming days.

>>30052508
>>30051809
Getting there on the finals. Booze afterward, but everything in moderation of course.

>>30047148
>You move back into the same spot you were at, and Anon comes back inside, bag of bits in his pocket and the cookies in his arms.
>He puts them back, gets a single cookie, then walks back over to you both.
>"Hmmm, you guys find a perfume here or something? I like it."
>Brave grabs a random dress in her teeth and backs away.
>"I-I need to go try this on!"
>"Woah, that dress is sparkly."
>"I like sparkly!"
>She zips away, leaving you sitting on the ground and sweating like a pig.
>Yeah, maybe it's time for the armor to come off.
>You shed the pieces off, and it does help a bit.
>But all the fluff keeps it from really being cool.
>And all the heat just makes it harder to focus on something.
>"Sheesh, you know, you really oughta think about shaving or something. You look hot as hell."
>You're about to say the same back to him, but quickly realize it wasn't a compliment.
"Yeah, it's p-pretty hot."
>"When we get out of here, I'll grab a bunch of water for us."
>You nod, trying to cool yourself down and focus on your breathing.
>Hay, you hate this season...
>Can't just be those few weeks, can it?
>No, the weeks before AND after have to be JUST as bad, where every little thing will set you off.
>You shift slightly.
>A tingle moves down your back.
>HAY, why is it so BAD?
>All you did was see Anon!
>-Oh hay, it's BECAUSE of him!
>You remember hearing about it from other mares.
>That once you find your special somepony... THAT season gets worse.
>So much worse.
>Hay, it was one of the pros you'd tell yourself being single was great for.
>But you didn't think it would be THIS bad.
>"Something on your mind again? You know, you ponies are really bad at hiding things. ...I mean hell, I knew that guy was gonna try something the second he walked in here, that bastard."
>He smiles and stands proudly.
>"Guess being known as the "long-sloth" around here really gave me the advantage."
>His smile and posture slowly fades.
>"...Man the ponies here are dicks."

>>30053594
The plot thickens, and reddens, and moistens.

>>30053594
>long sloth
Kek. Blu with the save.

>Posting a new pic in a herd thread instead of here. >>30045356

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>>30053890
>new pic

>>30053594
>"Hmmm, you guys find a perfume here or something? I like it."
Makes a good cologne, too. You mares should make sure to spread it all over Anon.

>>30054001
>Using their own personal applicators. They leave snail trails right down anon's chest and thighs.

>>30032557
...

>KNOCK.
>KNOCK.

>Ow.
>Sound hurts.

>KNOCK.
>...
>KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK

>You don't have it in you to bellow a response downstairs.
>You press your head into your pillow and wrap it around your ears.

>...

>You wake up a few hours later, the pain in your head nearly gone.
>Just after noon, you figure, from a quick glance out the window.
>It's later than you like to get up, but not bad for a night after a long watch.
>And for the amount of drinking you did.

>Your earlier guest left a note under your door, scrawled on the back of a donut-shop receipt:
>"safe. where are you???? need to talk... not about bullshit you told me about C... Im pissed but water under the bridge... about loose ends. Ill help at moons since I cant see my fuckin marefriend now... fuckin pos docs. anon"

>You sigh.
>Anon can wait.
>Especially if he's worked up.
>It's hard enough to understand ponies when they're not foaming at the mouth in addition to everything else.
>Some tiring chore like that is the last thing you want to do today.
>Careful's in good hooves, and if Anon doesn't care enough to check back with you, his "loose ends" can't be that important.
>No. Today, you will relax.

>>30054243
I'm so glad you are here.

>>30054243
Heyyy. It's my first day of vacation, and I can heavily relate to safety. Just get drink and fuck doing anything that first day or so.

>>30054243
Safety is going to have to lift her tail and pleasure Anon while Careful recovers in the cuckshed.

>>30050175
Kill yourself

>>30053594
Oh, Brave just leaving your BFF to sweat and squirm. kek. Hopefully, Vannie realizes soon that Anon is a bit clueless.

>"Guess being known as the "long-sloth" around here really gave me the advantage."
>His smile and posture slowly fades.
>"...Man the ponies here are dicks."
??? Did you just catch on to an insult some ponies used to say to him in the past? Sorry, I don't get it.

>>30054001
>>30054039
kek. good job Anons.

>>30054243
Eyup, figured Anon would be pissed. Hopefully he works off some of his frustration while helping Moonie. This way he can return a bit calmer. Not saying Safety needs kid gloves but she was under quite a lot of stress.

Thanks for the updates guys! Looking forward to reading more.

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>>30053594
I like where this is going. Are we about to see a very affectionate bat?

>>30054243
Anon was already aware Safety was lying about Careful i'm not sure why he would be pissed at her about that. he knows she wouldn't be doing it just because.
also how the fuck did Anon find where she lives? he barely knew her name 12 hours ago

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>>30054919
>Brave just leaving your BFF to sweat and squirm.

Now I got the image in my head of anon noticing their discomfort and going to get a big bag of ice for them both to hug and cuddle.

I need a drawfag

>>30054974
>led over to a dressing room
>both mares take turns riding him while sweet is in the next room

>>30053594
Did sweet really not hear or notice any of that?
And even she's gotta twig to the scent eventually

>>30050175
>10:00 pm
>Finally! This has been a really interesting shift, but I am glad it’s finally over.
>Now to wait until the princesses walk out of that room, relieve us of our duty, and I can change out of this diaper.
>10:10 pm
>Argh! Where are they!? Our shift ended a while ago and I really need to change!
>I begin to feel a bit annoyed, having to wait, when STG. Stalwart speaks to me.
>“Hey, Midnight. It looks like the princesses will be a bit late coming out. Our shift is technically over, so how about you go change and I’ll stand guard?”
>Wow, he is really nice.
>I know this is against regulation, but I really needed to go change.
Thanks, SGT. Stalwart! I’ll, um… be back really quickly.
> As I begin my way back to the changing room, I could hear him call out to me again.
>“Midnight, I know I have asked you before, but could you please drop the ‘SGT.’? Stalwart is more than fine.”
“Okay, Stalwart!” As I turn to get changed, I could see him smile at me.
>Why do I feel so strange today? I better hurry up so Stalwart can get changed too.

>>30056372
>10:22 pm
>I finally make it back to the changing room.
>It's a small, well lit room that contains a padded table, cabinet, and bathroom.
>Okay, I better do this quickly and get back to Stalwart as fast as I can.
>I open the cabinet and remove the package of diapers in my size.
>Pulling it out, I find the box of wipes.
>lying down on the padded table I get to work un-taping the used diaper and cleaning myself off.
>After a lot of wipes, I finally managed to clean my coat off.
>A fun reminder to avoid doing this on the job again, no matter how great it was.
>I toss the used diaper into the nearby trash.
>As I put the box of wipes back into the cabinet, I hear something inside fall over.
>Looking inside, I see a little white bottle. I pull it out and open it. A familiar sweet scent flows out.
>Wait, that’s the same smell that comes from the room the princesses enter.
>I turn the bottle around to find the label says “Foal Powder.” So, that is why it smells so familiar.
>But why does that room smell like foal powder in the first place?
>Could it be that maybe the princesses… Nah, there is no way!
>I quickly take the thought out of my mind.
>I begin to place the bottle back, but a new thought enters my mind.
>I swiftly grab the package of diapers, turn around, and get back to the padded table.
>I mean, technically I am still on duty until the princesses relieve us, so I would need to be in my full uniform.

>>30056376
>I can try and explain it to myself all I want, but I just really want to try the foal powder this time.
>I diaper myself, this time using the foal powder.
>I really didn’t think it would make much of a difference, but for some reason I feel really warm inside.
>I really need to use this stuff whenever I get ready for a shift from now on.
>Remembering that I needed to get back to Stalwart, I return the supplies back to the cabinet and return to my post as fast as I can.

do not engage
report and ignore

>>30056456
>>30056456
At this point, I am just curious if the faggot is multiple dudes, or just one persistent fucker with a lot of proxies.

>>30056722
The way he almost consistently messes up "sgt" makes me think it's one person.

>>30057009
Then I guess he just has a bunch of proxies then.

>>30055397
he appears to be pissed about something else. Not the lies.

As far as her address maybe anon ask for the location from the guard hq or something.

>>30057839
my point about the lie was if he already knew and wasn't bothered/pissed by it, and your writing a note to someone with limited space why bring it up?
why not focus on the important matter you need her for?
Like "hey safe where you at? we need to sort shit with Honey, meet at moonies, doc's keeping me away from Care BS ~Anon"

like don't waste space and be vague, ESPECIALLY with Safety First, Anon should know better

>>30056456
>Someone is posting guard stories in the guard thread which has something in it that -I- don't like?!
>Report it! Reeee!
Do you have autism?

>>30058315
Trash has a board for itself, stay there.

yeah CW i haven't forgotten her, i'm still waiting for the scene with Honey Hive.
>foal in the room alone, shivering in the un-heated home, the wood having run out days ago
>the blankie doing little to keep the chilling bite off her hoovies
>playing with the sparse few toys not already sold away
>Already accustom to ignoring the strange sounds coming from her momma's room
>the thumping, groaning, crying, smacks and bangs
>momma says its okay,
>she's just doing a different job now
>but you hear her crying a lot
>even when not doing the job

just ruin me CW, i need to feel again

>>30058390
....because when Anon finds out we will help the everloving shit out of them?

>>30058406
well Anon currently has one broken arm and i'm guessing little more than pocket change... i doubt he got a pay check before all this went down.

helping them back on their hooves, While the obvious goal, starts the age old problem of how lifting a person from poverty isn't easily solved. (without mad bank)
A mare who deals with bee's .. in Canterlot... in winter.
The best we can offer is handout really.

>>30058315
Stop coming here already you dickless wonder. Bats, gays, diapers, you never miss a fucking chance to be that one loud obnoxious contrarian to everything. Thanks to the gookmoot 4chan has four designated shitposting boards. Just fuck off to one of them and never come back you dumb faggot.

bump from 9

When did maskedpony find this thread and what will it take for his pamper fetished ass to get out.

>>30058475
Kinda interested to see how pony healthcare plays out comparatively in the worlds that Blu and CW are creating, seeing as they're both taking place in the same city.

>>30058475
To be fair, Honey could be making a killing being a whorse.
She might be making more money than the rest of the cast, it is Canterlot after all, and high class hookers are a thing.

>>30060768
Ahem, courtesans. Let's not insult the poor mare.

>>30054243
>...
>"CHEEP CHEEP CHEEP."
>You hadn't had long to loiter by the door before a cacophony of attention-seeking chirruping met your ears from across the room.

"...oh! Cheep cheep cheep. Cheep. Cheep cheep..."
>You think your apology made it through to your five zebra finches, housed in an extra-large cage in the lounge, which you now trot over to.
>They still don't seem very pleased.
>You've been home twelve whole hours, after all, and you haven't let them out of their cage so large it can only be taken in and out of the house in pieces.
>The cage they can fly freely in you paid big for, specifically so they would be comfortable and entertained even while you were on duty overnight.
>"CHEEP CHEEP!"
"Cheep cheep... cheep."

>You open the cage.
>They let loose a small barrage of shit and take flight, zipping out of the cage and to their favorite spots in the house.
>For the little one -- you don't give them names more specific than that, as you believe they name themselves, and you don't wish to impose -- this place is your left shoulder, under your mane.
>He perches there, gets extra fluffy, and accompanies you for your morning routine.
>...or afternoon routine, as it is.

>Before long, you're lounging on your couch, sipping decaffeinated coffee, munching animal crackers (you're breaking your fast with them, so they're "breakfast," right?), and doing light reading: 'Luna: Her Exile and Return. Facts, Fiction, and Rumors!'
>The sun shines in bright through the windows, reflecting off the snow outside.
>Your birds keep you all the company you could want.
>You think you'll keep this up a while.

>>30060744
The Princesses pay for everything. They're fuckin rich because they're Princesses. I've thought this out.

>>30060875
Well now. Who is this?

>>30060744
>>30060886
Anon, mentioned earlier in the story that he's getting a "new citizen" stipend but wants to get a job. Another thing one of the MILFs takes issue with during the confrontation outside Moonie's shop.

Thanks for the update CW!

>>30060875
>>"CHEEP CHEEP CHEEP."
Safety and her minions. muahahah!
kek

bmp pg 8

resting pegasus
decaffeinated coffee?
chirping birds around

bmp pg 9

>>30060875
Aww, birdpone has bird pets. Also animal crackers are the shit.

>>30056383
>10:32 pm
>I swiftly make it back to the hallway where my post is.
>As I turn around the corner, I could hear somepony laughing.
>I stop myself as I quietly peer into the hall.
>It's a night guard laughing at Stalwart.
>Neither of them are lowering their voices, making it easy to listen in on the conversation.
>“...I have been seeing action instead of being stuck with this cushy job.”
>“you don’t remember our last exchange? It ended with your big head getting even bigger.”
>“Wanna go again, soggy diaper boy?”
>“You know what I think, I-” Stalwart paused for a few seconds.
>He looked like he was thinking something over, and then continued, his voice full of confidence.
>“You know what, you aren’t even worth it. Now if you excuse me, I have a job to do.”
>I couldn’t believe he didn’t even get angry at the pony.
>If that was me, I would have probably snapped a while ago. Even though Stalwart didn’t respond, that jerk kept laughing at him.
>That’s it, I can’t take this anymore.
>I take off my helmet and fly towards the two of them.
>“Hahaha, so it is true! You’re nothing more than a spineless, worthless pony that can't even-”
>I chucked my helmet at his head before he is able to finish his sentence.
>It made a loud clang from the impact and the jerk goes down into a heap quickly.
>I land and continued towards Stalwart.
>He looks pretty confused with what just happened.
>I hope I didn’t do anything to get us in trouble.
>Stalwart kinda scolds me for attacking another guard, but he really seemed happy that idiot couldn’t run his mouth anymore.
>I offer to take the unconscious pony to the infirmary.

>>30063472
>Stalwart loads him on top of my back and I quickly fly him over.
>When I arrive to drop him off, I tell them what Stalwart told me to say, about him obstructing our duty.
>At first, I thought it was because of my rank that they didn’t ask questions.
>But as I left, I could hear one of the nurses say, “Not him again.”
>So, I'm guessing this isn’t his first time doing something stupid.
>I make it back to my post and tell Stalwart he can get changed now.
>But for some reason he said he was okay.
>Maybe I am not the only weird one here after all?
>I take my post and continue the watch.

>>30063479
>11:03 pm
>The princesses finally exit, and we are relieved from duty.
>Before we leave to change and go home, Princess Luna hands me a list and tells me I need to come in early next week to restock the room with Stalwart.
>I am not too sure what that means, but at least I finally get to see what’s inside of it.
>Stalwart looked a bit nervous when he found out, but he seemed to have lightened up and started laughing after a few seconds.
>He walks with me to the changing room. As we arrive, I stop.
“You should go in first. After all, my diaper is still dry.”
>He smiles, “Thanks, Midnight. Be out real quick.”
>He enters, and in a few minutes, exits.
>It's so strange to see him without his armor or diaper on.
>Usually, he stays on after I leave, so I never see him outside of work.
>“Alright. Midnight, you’re up.”
>I nod as I enter the room, it takes me a few minutes to get out of my armor and place it on the stand in the room.
>I then take the unused diaper off, but it feels like a waste, throwing it away.
>I kinda want to keep it, but that would be really weird, even for me. So, I have to toss it away.
>I exit the room, expecting no pony to be there, but instead i'm greeted by Stalwart, waiting for me.
>I walk up next to him, smiling.
>I am really happy to see him there.
>Together, we exit the castle and continue to our homes.
>11:42 pm
>It was a long walk back to my house, but Stalwart was there to keep me company most of the trip.
>I think I really like him and I think I really like diapers.
>Or maybe, I'm just tired from today.
>I climb into bed, thinking about myself and Stalwart together in diapers alone.
>That thought made me really happy, but it seems also out of reach.
>Well, there is always next week.
>I sigh as I slowly drift off to sleep.

>>30063472
Fucking leave already you cancerous asshole. Side note, how the hell are you getting past the mods?

>>30063489
don't feed it (You)s report and ignore/hide

>>30063513
At this point I am just morbidly curious if Gookmoot fucking around lately has actually messed up the mods job.

>>30063513
>>30063518
>check threat
>it's back
>scroll past
Feelsgoodman. Keeps the thread bumped at least, if there's anything good that comes of it.

>>30064012
That's one way to look at it. Though I don't want to encourage any more. There is a place for that stuff in /trash/.

>>30064690
Not that anon, but naaah mate. Just ignore and scroll on. Giving them any attention bad or good is what they want. They fill this thread with stuff to scroll past we make a new one after bump limit. Not a big deal.

>>30064978
You dont ignore shitposters only, report and ignore, just plain ignoring is just as bad as actively encouraging them. And it is a big deal when newfags coming by think we're okay with faggots in diapers. That isn't good, ergo, talk down to the cancer and cut it out. Best of both worlds.
>>30064012
We want regular bumps or even comment bumps, not literal trash bait.
>>30064690
Yes. This. This is the correct response to the samefag. I mean this guy by the way>>30064012
>>30064978

>>30065122
Wasn't a samefag on that one. Just remarking that the only semi-useful thing to come out of that garbage story is bumping the thread.

>>30065501
Except we don't need it bumped when the shitposter is posting. We can keep it better than that garbage. The fucker does it when the thread is on page 5 or 6, when people are paying attention anyways. tldr, we don't need trash to bump a thread with people already paying attention to it.

>>30065516
Shame shitposters can't be more mindful and bump properly. Though I guess that comes with the role.

>>30065566
And the dub dubs speak the truth.

>>30051621
>Some time later…
>You are usually confident in your ability to read ponies.
>This is one of those times that you honestly can’t tell if someone is telling the truth or bullshitting you.
“Let me start from the top, and correct me if I get anything wrong.”
>Anonymous is still sitting on the floor, though now he’s adopted a lounging sprawl, despite the pistol you’re aiming at him.
>You begin to repeat his story, as if hearing yourself speak the words would make them easier to believe.
“You ‘appeared’ in Equestria one day, but you aren’t sure how.”
>He shrugs, still nursing his arm.
>You feel a little sorry about that.
>Still, he’s not dead, and at the present moment a high-profile fugitive.
>“Yeah, turns out we humans don’t know a whole lot about magic and shit.”
>His voice has held a level of spite ever since you began your interrogation.
>Obviously he had intended to be in your position, but from what you’ve seen of him so far, he’s not a particularly cunning criminal.
“Right, now here’s the part I’m still not understanding: you were a guest of the monarchy there, given a room in the castle and had your needs taken care of, in return for knowledge about your world.”
>“Alien shows up and the gubberment wants to know all about them. What’s so hard to understand about that?”
“I was getting to that.”
>Your harsh tone shuts him up.
>The night won’t last forever and you’ve got a long way back home.
“So after you’ve been given an easy living on a silver platter, you decide to pack up and leave, traveling to Damwall, of all places.”
>He opens his mouth to explain himself again, but you cut him off.
“All because of some kind of game you played back in your own world?”
>“Well when you put it like that, of course it isn’t going to sound like that great of an idea,” he mumbles, apparently having had the same thought before.

>>30065588
>His descriptions were strange.
>Games that were played not on physical tables or boards, but interacted with through something resembling a mirror.
>That part doesn’t concern you; it’s a trivial secondary detail, one that doesn’t pertain to your primary investigation.
>The world in the game he described, however, troubled you immensely.
>A world crumbling in a time of plague, an empress murdered, a hero that pulls the empire back from the edge.
>More disturbing are the names: the city of Dunwall, the nation of Gristol, even a few street names bore resemblance to those in your own world, or so he told you.
>One name sticks out above them all.
>The Outsider, a bored, indifferent demigod who enjoyed giving supernatural powers to mortals, and watch to see what they would do with them.
>You are tempted to discard it all as a ridiculous fiction, but one thing stops you.
“The Void. Tell me again what it’s like.”
>In your world, there are no descriptions of it.
>You’ve heard stories, of course; of witches performing hideous rituals in the forgotten places of the city, strange and unexplained lights spotted by ships far out at sea.
>But nopony could explain what the Void actually looks like, and if they could, then they were very tightlipped.
>Anonymous heaves a sigh as he sits up.
>“It’s strange, y’know. Floating chunks of rock, buildings, items you remember from your own world. It’s quiet, no wind or anything. Sometimes there’s whales floating way off. It’s just empty, like a winter sky in every direction.”

>>30065593
>Jesus Anon that was corny.
>She’s the one with the gun though, so just answer her questions and maybe you can get out of this without getting shot again.
>More likely you’ll be back in Coltridge before sunrise.
>The mare has gone quiet, and you look up at her.
>Her eyes are still locked on you, still watching you, but behind them you can tell she’s deep in thought.
>She probably doesn’t believe you.
“Look, I know this all sounds cra-”
>“What happened.”
“What?”
>“In the game. What happened in the story?”
>Okay, detective, whatever you want.
“Well, like I said the world was similar to yours, but there’s a few major differences. The game started off with the Empress being murdered and her daughter abducted.”
>“Empress Coltwin didn’t have any foals.”
“Yeah, no shit, that’s why I said there were differences.”
>The pony shoots you an icy glare, and you continue in a subdued tone.
“After that, the main character discovered that high-ranking members of the government plotted to kill the Empress, and went about eliminating them and restoring the daughter to the throne.”
>“And I suppose the Lord Regent is behind the murder of my Empress, is that right?”
>You hold up your hands in a placating posture.
“I didn’t say that. In fact, in the game he outright says it to the main character’s face during a torture session before he escapes from prison. Even put it down in a voice recording.”
>Come to think of it, why didn’t the main character just grab that recording while escaping and distribute it?
>Guess it would have made for a short game.

>>30065604
“Nothing like that happened to me. I got out within a couple of days and nobody said anything to me before I escaped. Anyway, after that the similarities end, and your guess is as good as mine toward what’s going on around here.”
>“So, as far as I or anyone else knows, you are the assassin.”
>This fucking mare.
“I didn’t say that I-”
>You pause to breathe deeply and collect yourself.
>Yelling isn’t going to help you here.
“Like I already told you. I was making my way through Damwall Tower’s garden, where the Empress had invited me to dinner. When I arrived at the gazebo, she was dead, stabbed. No one else in sight. A moment later, the guards arrived and arrested me.”
>“How unfortunate for you.”
>The mare doesn’t mean it, judging by her voice.
“Look, you don’t have to believe me, but this is what I’m saying. The real killer is still out there. What’s more, I think there’s something bigger than an assassination going on. No ruler is ever killed for no reason, and you tell me, what reason would I have for killing the Empress? She welcomed me, just like the princesses in Equestria. She was good to me, I had everything I wanted here. Food, shelter, unlimited access to the Academy of Natural Philosophy, even my own office there.”
>You figure you’ve talked enough.
>Now it’s her move.
>She just stands there, pointing your pistol at you, gears turning in her head.
“You going to arrest me or…”
>“Is there anyone who would want to frame you?”
>Alright, now we’re getting somewhere.
>Sort of.
>The truth is you don’t know.

>>30065623
>You got on well enough with the other members of the Empress’ court.
>The royal spymaster, now Lord Regent, was always polite and curious to learn more about Earth.
>The High Overseer was a bitch, but you suppose that had to do with you being an alien.
>She probably thought you were some Void demon, though she never voiced such a belief in public.
>Various nobles you’d met at banquets were always fascinated, though you got the feeling they saw you as more of a charming oddity than an equal.
>The scientists at the Academy were by far your favorite company.
>You had a decently mechanical mind, and fortunately Earth technology was leagues ahead of what these ponies were dealing with, for the most part.
>The hands didn’t hurt either.
>As a result, you were something of a genius when it came to mechanical tinkering and experimenting, resulting in you being offered an office at the Academy.
>“Well, is there?”
>You wrap up your memory and address the guard mare.
“High Overseer Cantle, maybe. She was the most openly opposed to my being in the Empress’s presence, or in the Empire altogether. In the game, it was the Lord Regent who organized the whole thing, but I never knew your world’s equivalent to disagree with the Empress. They were both at a loss as to how to put an end to the Plague.”
>The pony nods softly, and you swear you can see smoke coming out of her ears as she works her brain overtime.
>You really don’t want to spend the rest of the night at gunpoint, and try to hurry things along, gambling that you’ve said enough to stay out of state custody for now.
“Well, we going or not, cause it’s a long walk to Coltridge and my legs are cramping just sitting here.”
>The mare doesn’t seem to appreciate gallows humor, but in the withering look she shoots you, you can see something else.
>Uncertainty.

>>30065651
>She slowly backs toward the loading platform door, relaxing the pistol but staying wary.
“If you’re looking for leads, I’d check my office at the Academy. I kept all of my notes and a journal in a hidden safe beneath the desk.”
>Anon, buddy, why are you telling her this?
“The combination is ‘4-2-7.’ Although if someone was interested in seeing me take the fall for this, I think the general state of the office might tell you more.”
>She’s almost out the door.
>Shit, you almost forgot.
“Wait! The shrine, the rune. What happened to you? Did you see it? You did, didn’t you, otherwise you wouldn’t be so intere-”
>“I’m not answering anything from you. But I will want more answers.”
>With that, she rounded the corner, a light clattering signaling her departure.
>You stand up and stretch – the leg cramps weren’t a joke – and shuffle over to the door.
>Laying on the platform is your pistol, and the guard mare is nowhere to been seen in the darkened street.
>Spooky.
>You pick up the pistol and tuck it under your cloak.
>You’re still a free man, and you’ll probably be safe here a while longer.
>Although you’re not entirely certain of it, you might have made an ally tonight.
>And you will want plenty of answers too.

>>30065660
Enter our green friend. From this point on I'm going to be branching away from the game's story for the most part. Can't have our guard mare retreading an old tale.

>>30060875
I hope Anon does fuck Safety. Pegasi are sexy as fuck.

>>30065670
That was quite meta. I'm curious to see what you have in store for the little pone, Outsider.

>>30065660
The plot thickens
>or rather, radically changes direction

>>30063489
>>30063518
It's not against the rules to post green stories. Sure, that particular story is bad as hell. But so what? Just scroll past it, that's what I did.

>>30067397
And you must be the faggot writing trying to subvert attention to your shitposting, I can tell because your using the same excuse the regular faggot shitposters tried using, your not wanted here, go back to the trash where you belong.

>>30065670
Interesting. Solemn seemed to wrap her brain around the alternate reality aspects well enough. Probably because of her initial conversations with The Outsider. Good Job Whiskey. Looking forward to seeing the next update.

Questioning Solemn
Anonymous not too blame?
Off to seek answers

pg 7

>>30068395
We'll get a little more of her thoughts soon enough

Reee where's B&V

File: Solemn rain.png (310KB, 976x927px) Image search: [Google]

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Have a WIP solemn rain

>>30071019
Thanks. I love watching artists practice their craft. I often find myself mesmerized as I see something appear upon a blank page; almost like magic.

>>30071019
Sweet

>>30071019
Love your work Neuro. The ponies are adorable and seeing a little behind the scenes action is awesome.

File: New Canvas.png (163KB, 786x546px) Image search: [Google]

163KB, 786x546px

>>30071071
Shit anon how did you know I used my magical pone powers to make art?

>>30068816
Ya know, I appreciate haikus as bumps. Have a (you) Anon, you qt

>>30071347
Aww, thanks Anon. I try to do more than just a simple page bump when I can.

>>30071155
because your poners are too qt

>>30071155
Nice face reveal, you're a cute

File: Solemn rain.png (304KB, 976x927px) Image search: [Google]

304KB, 976x927px

>>30071535
Anon pls
>>30071153
I'm glad you anons like my 'dorble poners

>>30072058
Cute af my dude. She's missing a tail though

File: 1494392599809.png (182KB, 496x389px) Image search: [Google]

182KB, 496x389px

i want to drink mead with this mare

>>30072448
That would be fun, maybe lead a drinking game.

File: 1494471536743.png (215KB, 685x969px) Image search: [Google]

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>>30073097
or nine
>"i told ya i could outdrink ya laddie, you dunnit stand a chance!"
>she cheers and holds her mug up
>"aint nopony able to outdrink me!"
>she downs the whole thing down, then wraps a leg around your shoulder
>"twas a good try though, mate! i havent drunken like this in years!"
>she laughs and has her mug refilled
>one long swig, then she looks at you again
>"in fact, i havent had this much o' fun in a long while!"
>she scoots a bit closer to you and finishes the rest of it
>a hoof moves over your leg and rests there
>"it dont have to end so soon, dunnit?"

>>30073726
>Wake up the next morning stuck together by the dired fluids of amore.
>The large viking guard mare gives you a few good wallops for taking advantage of her drunkenness and immediately leaves.
>6 months later there's a knock on your door.
>A large stallion viking is standing there with the guard mare. Her stomach distended with what ever unholy spawn your seed planted there.
>The the viking states that according to their law she is now your mate and responsibility.
> The mare gives you a look that says the next time you fall asleep. you won't be waking up.

>May as well ask her what her name is.

>Foreword:

>Following are the writings of Lord Anonymous Blankslate; explorer, entrepreneur, and gentleman; dating from the Thirtieth Day of the Season of Winter, 810th Year of Our Princess, to the First of the Season of Spring, 811.

>Herein lie accounts of sights, sounds, and super-heroic deeds so spectacular to survey, even second-hoof, that they surely may spur in our readers severe and shattering sensitivities of shock, stupefaction, and -- indeed -- even arousal of a sexual nature.
>However, such anecdotes may also arouse that rotten element of the psyche known as skepticism, an quality shared in equal measure by intellexuals, dastards, and others who doubt -- neigh, fear -- the authority and autocracy of our God-Princess.

>To quash any such queries, we, who have published these journals publicly for public perusal, give our authoritative assurance that these accounts are absolutely authentic.
>We take no pride in these claims; we wish merely to educate you, our readers, with utmost accuracy as to what lies in the pages ahead of you.
>If one sentence, neigh, one word in these accounts is found, undeniably, to be false, then may we both hang for our frightful fraudulence, our devilish deception!

>HAWKTHORNE AND HAYHOOF PUBLICATIONS PRESENT:
>JOURNALS OF LORD ANONYMOUS: THE YAKYAKISTAN EXPEDITION

>>30073975
>new episodes tomorrow.

Gotta batton down the hatches to keep the thread alive for this.

>>30073975
ITS HAPPENING

>>30073961
wait a sec, if she's drunk and a Viking then having sex while drunk would and should be a normal thing for her, though I am totally for Anon being a family man due to some law or something when she finds out its his.

>>30073975
Neat

Goodnight bump.

>>30078255
Now is not the time for sleep anon

at least the diaper green kept the thread active, now we're back to content-less bumps

>>30079288
Content-less bumps you say? Hang on a sec

>>30028626
>The world has always seemed more beautiful from the air, you think as you soar towards the coast.
>The spell-enhanced flight harness fitted to your wings boosts your cruising speed well beyond what ordinary pegasi are capable of, and admittedly the chance to use one was part of the pull factor for you to sign up for the Air Guard.
>Your section flies in a tight diamond with you at the leading tip, nestled into the tail of the larger diamond formed by the other three sections.
>Sixteen ponies, drafting off the leading section for an easier flight to the operating zone.
>Controlling weather was something that required special training and school, but pegasi magic gave each pony an inborn resistance to powerful winds and storms.
>Flying in close formation allows pegasi to consolidate this ability, punching through weather that would otherwise force groundings.
>You feel the air temperature drop sharply, and the scent changes from comforting spring fields to cold, damp and unwelcoming salt.
>The coast is coming up.
“Blue Section. Falling out and turning north, over.”
>“Copy, Blue Leader,” came Nimbus’s voice, now cool and emotionless, as it always became in the air.
>“The Oculus should be a ten minute’s flight up the coast, approximate relative bearing 15 degrees. Start broadcasting your presence at five minutes. Wouldn’t want any blue-on-blue.”
“Roger, Flight Leader. Good hunting.”
>With that, you reach to your helmet and move the communicator selector from “All-Comm” to “Sec-Comm.”
“Blue Section on my mark, drop below formation and execute 90 degrees turn left. Three, two, one, mark.”
>You nose below the group of ponies, feeling the buffeting of the wind increase as you drop out of their slipstream, and angle to follow the gray strip of wave-lashed sand far below.

>>30080076
>When the turn is complete, you swivel your head to ensure your section is with you, and raise a hoof to check the complex flight watch strapped over your sleeve.
>Eying the inlaid compass, you nudge right until 15 degrees points directly ahead of you, then activate the stopwatch next to it.
>“Clouds ahead, ma’am.”
>Blue Two, Nimble Sparrow, was a window-washer back in Manehattan.
>He’s always very attentive to weather patterns, claiming it was useful to avoid being slammed against skyscrapers in the city’s swirling wind currents.
“Alright everypony, stay tight. We’re going in.”
>A series of affirmatives reaches your ears as you feel the section in behind you, and you tense your wing muscles a little tighter, readying for the impact.
>The dark wall looms rapidly larger, and just before hitting it you lower your head and give a powerful beat of your wings.
>It’s as if you’re in a mob, and ponies are shoving you violently from every direction, including above and below.
>Rain streaks your goggles, nearly blinding you.
>The screaming wind tugs at your wings, daring you to keep them unfurled.
>You can hear the strained breaths of your section as they fight to hold formation.
>Intermittently you check your compass to make certain you’re on course, struggling to make headway in the lashing storm.
>As you look to your compass once more, you realize it’s been nearly five minutes since you left Nimbus’s squadron.
>You try to stay level and switch your communicator dial to “All-Comm” once again.
“T.M.S. Oculus, this is Air Guard Blue Section, on final approach.”
>Above the howling of the wind, you hear only static in your headset.
>“T.M.S. Oculus, this is Air Guard Blue Section, requesting confirmation of approach, come in.”
>Nothing.
>Dread is creeping up from your stomach and into your chest, making it hard to keep your already strained breathing steady.
“T.M.S. Oculus, do you copy…”

>>30080093
All I've got for now, got parties to attend.

>>30080100
Thanks for the green Whiskey.
>got parties to attend
Absolutely degenerate. I bet you have friends too.

>>30080508
m-maybe a few

Is blu kill

LIVE

>>30081071
Man I remember having friends, have fun Whiskey.
But don't burn yourself out with two greens at once.