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Royal Guard Mare Thread #29: Didn't Bump Edition

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Thread replies: 502
Thread images: 81

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>ongoing
Brave and Vannie - http://pastebin.com/8E2vAnyi - http://pastebin.com/PqiY52Zi
Careful's Charge - http://pastebin.com/CkZbn3E6
Magic and Mud - http://pastebin.com/mTAB4nnE
Whiskey and Cigars - https://pastebin.com/7M3ryVcQ

>ded
Finding It - http://pastebin.com/QxyZ3BfR
Feather Scarf - http://pastebin.com/u4HbciFL
Sniper Anon - http://pastebin.com/3eN6HitC
Silver Star - http://pastebin.com/ggWTgWeK
Meadow Stockade - http://pastebin.com/kWgzxg5d
Copper Wing - http://pastebin.com/x8UJTEhz
Anon’s Regiment - http://pastebin.com/ruhuxiA6

>random
"Sir, Yes Sir!" - http://pastebin.com/9WeeGgq7
Duty Bound - http://pastebin.com/WfLZh5EW
Anon Pointedly Does Not Get Sex with a Guard - http://pastebin.com/zi1KcnVC
Sirdubs: http://pastebin.com/ZVfta6Ti
Spankybat: http://pastebin.com/Q7viBeuf

>Remember, no homo.
>>
Did the MILFs get you guys or something?
>>
>>30030082
Maybe it died because nobody is allowed to post anything even remotely related to stallion guards?
>>
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>>30030082
>two episodes
>related discussion
>daily shitposting
>normalfags are out because weekend
Threads die all the time. Good thing starting new ones is free. For now
>>
Thread with 2 and a half writefags and at most 30 anon's dieds on a double episode weekend

Fucking shocking
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I shoulda drawn more qt guards to keep the thread alive
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>>30030284
>>30030645
I'll contribute. Guard mares enforcing equality when?
>>
>>30030796
I already know I'm a manlet you fucking horse, stop rubbing it in
>>
>>30030077
Previous thread >>29980540

Whisky updated >>30028626 in case anyone else missed it
>>
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>>30030077
more powerful with males tbhfam
>>
>>30030077
I was honestly surprised we didn't lose one last week as well.
>>
>>30030077
What the hell guardsmen, I go to sleep at my scheduled time and we sage?
>>30031131
Its a double weekend, I wouldn't be surprised if the faggots made new threads under the guise of conversing to stealth bump us off fo not wanting dick.
>>
>>30030882
Good work, >>30030796
that ponice mare is a cute.
>>
Going back to bed, don't let the faggots stealth sage us.
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>>30030645
Drunk vannie best vannie. desu our writefags seem to do a lot of drinking.
>>
>>30031164
>made new threads under the guise of conversing to stealth bump us off
This has been discussed in rgre too. There appears to be some faggot who bumps threads strategically so the generals he doesn't like end up on pg10, and then starts a bunch of low-effort, random threads to push them off the board.
>>
>>30030796
>>30031175
I didn't know we were including cute po-pos.
>>
>>30032184
They do guard people, its just with a different name. And cute tiny hats.
>>
>>30030645
They are so cute just as they are, but if more had armor on it would be easier to use as op.

or if you just drew in her helmet setting on the counter...
>>
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>>30032292
Yeah, I need to stop being lazy and make these mares wear protection
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>>30032399
I thank ya bunches.
>>
>>30025137
>...by the time Honor gets back, you're quietly crying.
>You've never cried any other way. Loud sobs just don't come to you.
>Still, anypony can recognize it when you do.
>Your eyes water, and you can't control your breathing except between gasps.
>The shame you feel at Honor seeing you in this state does little to ease you.

"Sorry."
>"No worries. Tiring day. Would you like me to leave?"
"No, n-no. Just... minute..."

>You let yourself cry and wait for your behavior to come back under your control.
>This happens sometimes when you drink, especially on days like this.
>There were moments positive and negative both, today... but there was so much overall you became overwhelmed.
>You never cry sober, so the experience of being able to do so that alcohol gives you is cathartic.
>It erodes some unwanted wall in your brain and lets all the Safe leak out.
>It's a release for exhaustion and fatigue, physical and mental, the same way you've found orgasm to relieve stress and tension.
>You'd prefer not to have that happen on front of your ranking officer either.

"I'm..."
>You manage to steady your breath.
"I'm good now."
>"I'm glad. Anything more I can do?"
"I couldn't ask any more-"
>"Nonsense. Let me at least..."
>Honor's horn flickers.
>Your corner woodstove flickers, its fuel set alight.
>The room seems immediately to warm.
>Honor smiles.
>"I won't insist on anything else. Sorry."
"It's fine. I actually would have forgotten..."
>"Right."
>>
>>30032556
"I'm humbled that you would... well, spend time..."
>"Oh, it's nothing. I always like helping my guard... uh."
>She seems to want to correct herself.
>"I don't want to come off wrong! I don't have a precinct-mommy complex or anything. Some of the captains I meet at the regional meetings do that. It's... weird."
>She scratches the back of her head in the firelight.
>She might be blushing.
>"I just... you all give Canterlot a lot, and you give me a lot. I just want to repay it. Maybe get back my balance of friend-duty to guard-duty while I'm at it..."

>That was more of an outpouring than you expected.
"...Oh. Well."
>This might be turning into an 'awkward silence.'
>You've never felt awkward in any silence, but you understand other ponies don't like just... looking at each other.
"I suppose you'll have fewer problems with that. Since you know where I live now."

>You didn't intend it as a joke, but Honor laughs and laughs.
>You sip your water, chat with her a little more, and tuck yourself in as she goes on her way, magicking your front door's lock shut behind her.
>You promptly fall asleep, the images of her, Careful, Moondancer, and Anon all lingering in your head.
>It's been a hard day, but a good one.
>>
>>30032557
awww honer is such a nice pony. Being so sweet to her. It good to have friends is high places.

Man. If Safety never really feels awkward. Maybe the next time she sees Honer will be a new experience for her. Assuming she remembers anything.
>>
>>30032399
>>30030796
You Anons never cease to impress me. I wish I had an ounce of your talent.

Sorry, I was not able to help keep watch today. I had to deal with some family shit IRL.

>sorta related to a topic in the last thread
A sign of a good friend is a friend who'll help you move.
>>
>>30032557
>>30032604
>>30032856
This was super cute. Glad her Captain is keeping a careful watch on her
>>
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>>30032954
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>>30030077
Reporting to duty bump!
>>
>>30032399
What kind of beer would Vannie drink?
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>>30034527
Vannie wouldn't drink "beer", aka piss water, she's better than that. She's definitely a vodka and gin girl.
>>
>>30034527
>>30034910
well the last time they got drunk i was on a bunch of fruity girly drinks

if she has to drink beer it would probably be something super light.
>>
>>30035239
blue moon
>>
>>30035288
roling rock
>>
>>30035363
>>30035239
>>30035288
>>30034910
So what would be each guard mare's preferred drink?
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>>30035888
Rewind would need some strong stuff after what she went through
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>>30036543
except she's still going through it, and will continue to forever because the story's never going to get finished
>>
Who's got a bump script running on this thread then?
>>
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>>30037439
Ok, I usually ignore these but how can I say now to a cutie batmare.

"I love you little pone."
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>>30037439
I love you little pone.
>>
>>30036998
So a neverending hypothetical spiral into alcohol-fueled depression then?
>>
>>30037439
I hope this is true
I love you little pone
>>
>>30018969
>“Damwall” and “city-planning” were two phrases that didn’t go together.
>Especially as industry spread its iron girders and gantries, the city was always growing chaotically.
>Buildings were never really demolished, just renovated, and built on top of until streets were squeezed in between them as an afterthought.
>Electric rail cars, an emerging novelty before the Plague, only ran in the most regal and at least partially thought out districts.
>It had made for some interesting chases in your guard career, experience that proved its worth tonight.
>After carefully leaving your room, you make your way to the roof of the next tenement.
>With hardly a meter between each building, trotting along the rooftops and clearing the gaps between is almost second nature.
>Well, for you anyway.
>There was that one Blinder Gang member who’d split during a sting.
>That mare could run; she led you halfway across the city, 8 stories off the ground.
>She didn’t know the layout like you though, and found empty air where an explosion had recently leveled a chemical-works.
>You didn’t kill her.
>She just jumped without looking.
>You clear the thought from your head as you leap to yet another roof, slowing to a canter.
>Rutshore Waterfront, no more rooftops.
>The Roanhaven River stretches before you, its wide lazy bends cutting the city in two as it wends to the sea.
>The waters are empty beneath the cloudy night sky, save for the single dim spotlight of a River Patrol boat chugging slowly upriver.
>You’re more interested in the hulking iron monstrosity that straddles the two shores, looming in the dark like a vast skeleton.
>Coltwin’s Bridge had undergone several changes throughout its life.
>Originally a simple causeway of stone arches to link the two halves of the city, shops and apartments sprang up along its length to attract travelers as they crossed.
>>
>>30039668
Aaaand I've got a "connection error" and am stuck mobile posting now. Any advice?
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>>30039741
Connection error happens with longer posts, so split it into a bajillion pieces I guess.
>>
>>30039741
its been happening to others posting green as well.
try breaking the posts into smaller parts, some guys were saying it may just be one bad string that stops it so smaller posts let you find that, its some kind of sever bug
>>
>>30039668
>More recently, the whale oil boom meant that large ships had to travel upriver to the refineries.
>The middle of the bridge, where the channel was deepest, was knocked down, and a massive mechanical drawbridge had taken its place.
>Huge gears and pulleys lifted the middle section of the street between the towers on either side of the bridge whenever the ships steamed through, and the shriek and groan of metal could be heard up and down the waterway.
>You observe the bridge from your perch atop a workhouse.
>Guards are posted at the entry to the bridge, a situation you knew, through talk within the Watch, would be mirrored on the other side.
>>
>>30039797
>Patrols would certainly be making rounds along its length; curfew was heavily enforced on the bridge at night, it being one of few places to cross the river without getting wet.
>Fortunately, you know a shortcut.
>A maintenance catwalk stretches along the bridge’s underside, inaccessible until after you pass the checkpoint, and therefore, likely unguarded.
>You pick your way carefully down from the roof, finding a fire escape on an adjacent building and hopping across.
>Peering from a nearby alley, you observe the scene.
>A guard hut is positioned in the middle of the street leading onto the bridge.
>Two Watch guards stand warming themselves by an improvised barrel stove, while their officer is poring over something in the hut.
>This shouldn’t be too hard.
>>
>>30039817
>After searching the alley, you peek back around at the outpost, empty liquor bottle in hoof.
>Neither guard is really keeping an eye on their surroundings, and you cross to the wall along the riverfront, gambling that they won’t look too hard left or right when you make your move.
>Edging as close to the gate as you dare, socks keeping your hooves from echoing on the broken cobblestone, you freeze and heft the bottle.
>>
>>30039833
>You’re close enough to hear the guards conversing.
>One of them asks the other how old his sister is, getting his answer in the form of a hoof to the side of his helmet.
>You take the opportunity and throw the bottle high, watching it arc into the darkness across the street.
>It breaks unseen with a ringing that shatters the stagnant river air, and a cat screeches angrily.
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>>30039836
>The two guards jump, hooves immediately going to their swords.
>“The hell?”
>>
>>30039861
>“Bottle Street boys,” exclaims one, charging confidently into the gloom.
>“I told you I’d wring your damn necks if you came back ‘round here!”
>>
>>30039870
>His companion eagerly joins in pursuit; obviously, they’ve some bone to pick with the nonexistent trespasser.
>Well, the trespasser is real.
>>
>>30039881
Fucking Christ this is annoying. I'm done for the night.
>>
>>30039881
>Well, the trespasser is real.
>She’s just not over there.
>By now the officer, a very upset looking sub-lieutenant, has stumbled from the hut to find his squad members gone.
>“Corporal? Corporal wait it’s not – damnit.”
>He hurries off after them, swearing and struggling to secure his harness around himself.
>You can’t quite believe if you’re lucky or if this particular squad is as fresh as their officer.
>That went better than planned; no time to question it.
>You emerge from the shadows and pass the guard hut before thinking better of it.
>Might be something useful in there.
>You grumble at yourself as you slink into the hut and make a quick search of the drawers in its desk.
>A key is buried under a stack of old logbooks and notices, with no markings to clue you in on its purpose.
>>
>>30039741
Try completing the captcha before posting, tends to help me when I have a large post to do.
>>
>>30040041
>Still, you shove it hastily in a pocket and rush outside again, ducking into the shadows between a couple of closed shops.
>At the end of the alley is a gate in the bridge wall, a stone staircase leading downward along the wall.
>You make your way down the path, and it quickly turns into the metal catwalk you sought.
>A metal barrier blocks you from continuing under the bridge, and you bring out the pilfered key.
>It’s a perfect fit, and the door swings open.
>>
>>30040052
>You close and lock it behind you, not wanting to leave too much of a trail, and examine the way forward.
>The catwalk hangs by metal struts reaching from the underside of the bridge.
>It looks unnervingly flimsy, and you can hear the babble of the river far below as it swirls past the bridge’s piers.
>Swallowing hard, you make your away across at a walking pace, not willing to risk anything faster.
>>
>>30039891

>One of them asks the other how old his sister is.
Kek, blow off choffer.

I don't blame you, right now the whole sistem for posting green has gone to trash.
>>
>>30040061
>Fortunately your suspicions were confirmed; there are no guards down here.
>Eventually you reach the other side and find an identical door, opening it with the same ease.
>You return to street level and sneak through the alleys, looking for another bottle.
>You find one, this time a discarded wine bottle, its label suggesting the previous owner was either wealthy or a thief, and silently approach the end of the bridge.
>>
>>30040071
>Again, two guards and an officer are in the way.
>The officer is currently berating one of the guards.
>Something about a sloppy uniform being a reflection of one’s character, and subsequently, that of his superiors.
>Their backs are to you, but you won’t be able to approach any further until they are distracted; a couple of streetlights bathe the checkpoint in their light.
>Getting this bottle all the way to the other side of the street is going to take a little extra oomph.
>>
>>30040079
>As the grilling continues ten yards ahead of you, you step into the street and gird yourself.
>With a couple steps-worth of a running start, you heave the bottle through the air and frantically dive for cover behind the stoop of an apartment building.
>A distant crash signifies that you’ve hit the mark, and you lay your ears flat to take a peek.
>The officer has gone silent, peering intently into the darkness across from him.
>He raises a hoof and signals to the guards, a mare and a stallion, directing them to advance.
>>
>>30040084
>The three walk into the street and pause, ears swiveling for sound.
>This is as good as it’s going to get, you guess.
>The gap between the seawall and the left-side guard is the largest, and you make for it, crouching and treading as quietly as you can.
>Almost there…
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>>30040092
>You make it behind the mare and are creeping along the seawall when your blood turns to ice.
>“Hey! You, stop right there!”
>You don’t turn around to find out which one spotted you.
>>
>>30040104
>You’ve never been on this end of the scenario before.
>You panic.
>Fear taking full control, your frantic eyes pick out the nearest alleyway and you lunge toward it.
>>
>>30040112
>Suddenly, you are fully enclosed in darkness, the voices of the Watch ponies far behind you.
>“What in the Void?”
>“Where’d she go?”
>Now you turn around.
>>
>>30040121
>You are in the alley.
>The wall you were just pressed against is a solid twenty yards behind you.
>What in the Void, indeed.
>Another one of the Outsider’s gifts?
>>
>>30040126
>You rush the rest of the way down the alley, snagging a fire escape and clambering to the top, in case the guards decided to make a thorough search.
>When you reach the rooftop, you look upriver.
>Bulwark’s Cannery isn’t far now.
>You try to remember what happened in the street below.
>>
>>30040139
>The extreme focus you felt as you made up your mind to bolt into that alley.
>Looking across to the adjacent roof, you focus on it, imagining yourself on the other side, and tense your muscles as if to jump.
>Your vision blurs, and when it clears you find yourself in the middle of the roof, no clattering of hooves as you land, as if you’ve been standing there all along.
>This, this could be fun.
>>
>>30040147
Ok, now I'm really done. Hate leaving an update unfinished. I'll add it to the pastebin for anyone who wants to read it in a less autistic format.
>>
>>30040147
I want to cuddle the gifted little mare.
>>
>>30032557
Thanks for the update CW. Hopefully Safe gets a restful sleep.
>>
>>30040147
Your short updates and slow speed anger me, but this yarn of yours delights me.

Anon as the (Possible) sidekick is neat.
>>
>>30040368
Can't rush perfection, or lazy sacks of shit. Glad you're enjoying it.
>>30040185
More cuddles and maybe more mares in the future.
>>
The shitposting is real today
>>
>>30040147
Good update Whiskey despite the posting issues.
I found the one-shot you put in the last tread intriguing. Do you plan on continuing that one? Maybe after you finish 'Whiskey and Cigars'?
>>
>>30040147
damn that must be a real pain in the ass to post like that.

hopefully it is just a glitch that will go away soon and not trolls getting the mods to think fan fiction is bad some how.
>>
>>30040147
Blink is THE shit.

Bone charms when?
>>
bump 7
going to sleep. See ya'll tomorrow.
>>
>>30042187
night
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>>30042222
The best night I've ever seen
>>
>>
>>30041113
That's a possibility. I hadn't given much thought about where to take that one, so I'd have to come up with something. I'll be done with school here in a few days, so after that I'll probably be able to update more often.
>>
>>30040777
>more mares
I CAN'T HOLD ALL THESE WAIFUS
>>
>>30042981
time to choose then
http://www.strawpoll.me/12921628
>>
>>30042222
Nice quads.

>>30042465
I don't think I've seen this cutie before. She looks like she could be Careful's or Brave's younger cousin. She's just joined the RG wanting to follow in her cousin's hoofsteps. No, wait. As I gaze at her visage I feel she's more likely Safety's cousin. Long has she admired Safety First but the adoration is lost on our favorite pegasus guard mare. Safety just thought that it was a phase the little filly was going through. Until Safety spots Autumn Breeze stepping out of the RG Boot barracks dressed for hoof-to-hoof combat training.
>"Huh, I guess it wasn't a phase after all."

Ok, I better stop there before I dream up yet another story idea I don't have time to write.

>>30042827
Excellent. I hope this past school year broadened your horizons and expanded your knowledge. The one-shot stands on its own fairly well yet left plenty of room for further exposition.

>>30043009
UGH! You're killing me. Don't make me choose. I love them all.
>>
>>30043288
>>30042465

are you really that far up your own ass you can't see that's a shity stallion OC?
>>
>>30043631
Why would we know its a stallion OC? Just make it a mare cause it looks like one.
>>
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>>30043646

endorsement of some hot trap action if ever I heard it, I'm down for Anon getting a surprise dick in the face and then licking every sweaty musky inch
>>
>30043673
>Some faggot ignoring making it a female because it looks like one
>Wants to keep it a trap for no reason.
No. Bad faggot, go be a parasite elsewhere.
>>
>>30043673
What part of, "your only going to get a dick when its balls deep in hot mare depths", did you faggots not understand?
>>
>>30043699
>>30043686
>>30043646

you guys refugees from >>traptickler ?
because your singing their theme song
>its not gay if they look like a mare
>>
>>30043741
....are you just sleep deprived and couldn't see the screen clearly? Because literally none of those posts are for having a trap/gay shit. Unless your this guy>>30043673
and your just acting retarded to try and...I don't even know what you would be trying to do here. The faggots we have shitposting, and apparently trap thread is dropping in too for some damn reason($5 says that the faggot general started trying to get more dicks from them), are not very smart(see the definition of retarded).
>>
Meh, Just ignore the Mr.B8R. Even if it was obviously a stallion (which it is not) I would still make the green / prompt about a mare because...it's about Royal Guard Mares ITT.
>>
>1:33 am
>My name is Midnight Bloom and I am one of Princess Luna’s personal guards.
>it is a few minutes before my shift and I am getting into the rest of my uniform.
>I work alongside SGT. Stalwart Stance, one of Princess Celestia's personal guards.
>I don’t really understand why I was selected to be a guard.
>Just a few weeks ago I ran a small flower shop in Canterlot, but for some reason, I was requested to try out as a night guard.
>What scares me is not only did I pass, I was selected to work as Princess Luna’s personal guard.
>To be completely honest, I'm not even sure how I've been kept on for so long.
>Back when I was supposed to get my orders, I think Princess Luna assumed, because I was a Bat Pony, I would be more nocturnal.
>I don’t blame her, but because I used to run a flower shop I was more a day pony.
>So I kinda, sorta fell asleep during my 3:00 am orientation meeting.
>Because of that I feel I might have been doing a poor job, and I always feel like everypony is watching me for mistakes.
>>
I don't mind a guard stallion who looks like a mare.
>>
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>>30044300
Too bad this thread is just for Guardmares.
>>
>>30044234
Did you just assume my sleep schedule preferences?
>>
>>30044347
And that no other guard threads are allowed.
>>
>>30044234
>11:47 am
>I slip on the rest of my custom armor.
>It is fairly standard night guard armor complete with helmet, but the back plate is left open to accommodate an addition to my uniform.
>For some reason, as part of our job, SGT. Stalwart and I are required to wear diapers.
>While I really don’t understand the details thanks to my nap the first day, I am actually pretty happy with this arrangement.
>While the pay is great, the hours are a bit odd and we can be called on to take any shift at any time. >So, SGT. Stalwart and I tend to um… use them occasionally. Okay, no. I lied. We need them, like, every shift.
>I mean, not that I am exactly complaining or anything…
>I finish placing my greaves on and proceed out the changing room to take my post.
>>
>>30044371
>12:00 pm
>Today, I have to work from twelve to ten.
>I am actually pretty happy because this lets me sleep in.
>As I arrive at my post, I look over to see STG. Stalwart standing by his station, diligently.
>Even with his diaper on, he always looks so cool. Unlike me, he always seems to be on top of things and so confident.
>Walking up next to him, I say good morning like I do every day.
>He, as always, responds by smiling and nodding at me.
>He is very serious about his job, but he is always so nice to me.
>He then returns to his firm stance and serious demeanour.
>Seeing him diapered like that, he looks really cute. Too bad I have to work. I stand up next to him, take a similar stance, and wait for the princesses to arrive.
>>
>>30044371
>Neat idea
>diapers
get out, don't come back.
>>
>>30044380
>1:30 pm
>After standing for over an hour, the princesses finally arrive, and we bow.
>They always look so refined as they arrive.
>Princess Celestia and Princess Luna always ask each of us how we are doing. After talking for a bit, they then proceed into the room.
>I am not too sure, but I think I shouldn't glance inside as they enter. I really don’t know what the room we are guarding even looks like.
>To be honest, I actually have no clue what I am even guarding.
>To make matters worse, since my rank is so high and this assignment is restricted, the only other ponies that know what I am doing is are the princesses and SGT. Stalwart.
>So, I have yet to work up the nerve to ask anypony what I am supposed to do.
>I just hope that as long as I do what he does, everything will work out for the best.
>It is the strangest thing, though; whenever that door opens or closes I always smell this sweet perfume.
>I would ask SGT. Stalwart but he never seems to notice, so I’d rather not bother him.
>>
>>30044391
>3:30 pm
>It was now half past three and the day guards were beginning their rotation.
>When I first started this job I was afraid about all the ridicule I would get for wearing a diaper in public, but everypony has been very nice.
>As they walk by, they always salute us, and no pony stares or anything.
>At first, I was afraid it would be really embarrassing, but the way everypony treats us, I am certain whatever we're guarding must be really important.
>It makes me really proud doing this, but STG. Stalwart is always so serious with this job.
>He never smiles at any of the guards that pass by.
>Maybe I should try to act more like him… I stop to take a look at him; he looks lost in thought.
>seeing him without his serious face looks so strange.
>Wow, he really does look super cute in his diaper.
>I tried to turn away, but I couldn’t help but take one more look at him. I, um… better get back to guarding my post.
>>
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What's going on in this thr-
>>
>>30044780
Just some trash crawling around. Same procedure as the faggots on this one.
>>
>>30044858
>It's only trash if it's something -I- don't like
>>
Homosexuality is a mental illness
>>
>>30044895
Just like lesbianism is.
>>
>>30044858
>fag rage anon also hates diapers

I see, so you were still in diapers when your uncle touched your no no place, and now you associate both diapers and homosexual emotions with that event.

You should know it wasn't your fault Anon and you can't let this unreasonable hate and anger ruin your life.
>>
>>30044880
>implying diapers and faggots are liked literally anywhere outside of trash
There's a reason you pieces of garbage only thrive at the bottom of bin.
>30044937
no (you) for you, try again with better bait.
>>
>>30045028
>I must start arguing with everyone who likes things that -I- don't like because I'm unable to simply ignore it
You really are a self-centered asshole.
>>
>>30045028
ain't b8 m8

you seem to have some real issues that need addressing man, have you thought about therapy?
I know there's a lot of stigma around it but they can help, just talking things over can be a great relief
>>
Reminder to not reply to the bait posters, just report and ignore. That means you antifag guy, they aren't trying to hide it. Don't play their game.
>>
>>30045101
He says while shitposting in every single guard thread that doesn't have a "Mares only"-rule in the OP.
>>
>>30044397
theres more to this ?
>>
>>30045245
Go to trash, they would have this shit. Unless your the faggot that made it and your just responding to yourself. Which would result in the same response, get out and go to the trash heap with the rest of the filth.
>>
>>30044397
This is weird, yet also kinda funny in a way.
>>
>>30040147
>Your left arm hurts like a motherfucker.
>The bullet had grazed you, digging a deep furrow through the upper arm and costing you a lot of blood.
>When that Watch pony had passed out, she crashed to the floor, her hoof sliding through the trigger guard of her pistol and squeezing the trigger while it was still pointed in your general direction.
>You managed a tourniquet with a strip of your cloak, one of the few human-sized garments you’d come across that fit your anatomy decently.
>Could have been worse.
>It could have killed you.
>>
>>30045552
>You glance around your abode, thinking darkly that it might have been an improvement.
>Ever since you’d fled Coltridge prison, you hadn’t talked to a single being, other than that guard mare.
>From the Empress’s court to abandoned, collapsing and Plague-ridden factories.
>Fine banquets to… whatever is in the can you’re heating over your jerry-rigged fire ring.
>>
>>30045563
>Whale, maybe, though from what you’d seen there were no real regulations on the burgeoning meat industry in this city.
>Something something Upton Sinclair.
>Good going, Anon, this is so much better than Equestria.
>>
>>30045552
>>30045563
>>30045572
Good.
The shitposting can finally end and we all can just enjoy some delicious smoky greens.
>>
>>30045572
>You’ve been thinking about the events of the last day.
>Your failed attempt to communicate with the Outsider; one of countless others.
>>
>>30045552
Just type original form in the options space, that should let you make full posts. Some guys in incest figured the trick out.
>>
>>30045588
>Bits of bone weren’t hard to come by, and you’d read countless books at the Academy of Natural Philosophy on charms, runes and everything surrounding them.
>>
>>30045590
No such luck. My first post I can fit 5-6 lines. After that it drops to 3-4 until eventually I'm posting 1 line at a time. Wonder how diaper guy managed it.
>>
>>30045607
>But no.
>They have no song to sing to you, no heat or coolness to greet your fingers when you touch them.
>Maybe humans are just immune to their influence.
>Or maybe it really is a bunch of nonsense, like some at the Academy propose, behind closed doors and with a bit of spirits between them.
>>
>>30045641
>No.
>You know it’s real.
>You saw how that mare reacted to your rune, the fear in her eyes before they rolled back in her head.
>How she collapsed at a simple touch.
>You’re still an idiot for telling her where to find you.
>>
>>30045654
>She is a Watch officer, and she’ll probably be along any day now with a battalion to run you down.
>Another day, that’s all.
>Then you pack up and move.
>Again.
>>
>>30045709
>A distant thud rolls through the streets below, echoing over the whistle of wind through the factory’s decrepit windows.
>Sounds like an explosion.
>>
>>30045721
>You’d gotten pretty good at setting traps since your escape.
>Slow down your pursuers and notify you of their presence, give you a chance to pack up and move to a new hideout.
>>
>>30045730

>Well, decently good, anyway; the mare figured out the bottle-under-the-window easily enough.
>You stand from the fire and whip an oil cloth over the top, quickly smothering it.
>>
>>30045745
>You stand from the fire and whip an oil cloth over the top, quickly smothering it.
>You had taken to sleeping during the day, using the cover of night to eat and move about, since you’re twice the height of anyone else in the city and aren’t exactly inconspicuous.
>>
>>30045755
>A pistol lifted from an inattentive guard post sits on a nearby filing cabinet, and you move to retrieve it.
>The weapon is awkward to hold, its trigger guard far too large and allowing your entire hand to rest on the oversized trigger.
>>
>Cutting the story up into hundreds of tiny little pieces and taking up a ton of posts like this
Are you retarded?
>>
>>30045630
Guess he knew how to correctly pad his posts HA
>>
>>30045771
>Stupid thing didn’t even have a safety.
>Otherwise your arm would probably be fine.
>You stalk to one of the windows, cocking the pistol with your bad arm before raising it beside your head.
>>
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>>30045782
Are you?
You know there's some sort of glitch where you can't post large greentexts, right?
>>
>>30045782
Stubborn
>>30045788
And new. What do you mean.
>>
>>30043009
>nobody likes autistic birbpone
Saddening.
>>
>>30045799
Diaper humor
>>
>>30045799
Hey, respect to you for the effort of trying to get a decent post Whiskey, thanks

My only idea would be to try a different browser with a cleared cache
>>
>>30045790
>Somewhere in the depths of the city, a clocktower chimes twelve.
>It’s hiiiigh noon.
>Midnight, whatever.
>You press against the wall, peering carefully around the window’s edge to see what might be waiting below.
“I’ll be damned…”
>You whisper to yourself.
>Below you is a small sand-colored mare with a black mane, wrapped snuggly in a long gray jacket.
>She’s facing the building across the street, as if hesitating to go inside.
>Or pick out the best way to do so.
>The name above the entryway is still visible, though the damp air of the city had corroded the paint.
>“Bulwark’s Cannery”
>You slowly rotate into the window, bringing the pistol to bear as best you can with one arm.
>Mustering a commanding voice, you call down to the mare.
“Don’t move.”
>>
>>30045880
Bam. [original form] worked.
>>30045880
>>30045590
Thanks for the advice anons, that's finally it for this update.
>>
>>30045814
Spagettipone needs love
>>
>>30018426
>While Brave blushes from all the compliments Anon's giving her, you spin around and look again.
>Find something that he'll approve of.
>-No wait, that's just what he told you NOT to do!
>You're shopping for yourself, here!
>...You'll just probably never use these things by yourself.
>How would you, anyways?
>The little bell on the door rings, and somepony walks in.
>Like everything is just subtly trying to take your mind off the task at hoof.
>With a hoof on your chin, you hope the philosophical pose will help you think better.
>"HEY, MOTHERFUCKER!"
>Your ears perk up, and you watch Anon sprinting towards that pony.
>And right before he goes through the door, you see the bag of bits and the boxes of cookies he's carrying.
>And at the same time, he sees the glint in your armor.
>His whole expression falls.
>Oh, you better be scared.
>You and Brave bolt after him at the same time.
>And knowing Brave's the better runner, you quickly hold the door open for her, then follow suit.
>But the second you go outside, you watch Anon yank the stallion's tail and tackle him.
>"GIVE ME MY FUCKING COOKIES!"
>They tumble into the ground, and almost immediately, he's got him pinned.
>The stallion struggles, but clearly can't go anywhere.
>Anon doesn't even look like he notices the struggling.
>-He's not even using both arms to hold him!
>And it's an EARTH PONY!
>You watch as two nearby guards walk up to them both.
>...Oh, right, you forgot you're a guard, too.
>-Well, you're off duty, anyways.
>Just means less paperwork for you.
>The second Anon gets off, the stallion tries to bolt, and the two guards pile on top of him.
>They clearly have trouble holding him down, though.
>Anon simply holds him down again while the two perform the arrest.
>Oh mare, he's so strong...
>-OH HAY.
>You quickly bring your tail in and slowly back up into the store.
>Brave does the same, and you both share a look.
>No words need to be said.
>The shame is clearly mutual.
>>
>>30030284
threads never die
they just go to hell to regroup
>>
>>30046101
Thanks for the update Whiskey. We appreciate your tenacity.

>>30047148
Aww, flustered Guard Mares. Thanks for the update Blu.
>>
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>>30045814
You tricked me. I was gonna vote for Carfull but went for birdpone and that's only because its too cruel to chose between Vanni and Brave.

>>30043009 that damn straw poll is an affront to them all and should never have existed.
>>
>>30047762
And then the strawpoll split the guardsmare general into factions, plunging them into an endless war
>>
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>>30047801
>"War. War never changes."
>>
>>30047860
>In the Age of Shitposting, the general was unformed, shrouded by bait
>A land of Anons, copypasta, and everlasting bumps
>But then there were writefags
>And with writefags, came guardsmares
>Blu, and Careful
>Secto, and Whiskey
>And of course, pones, and bats
>Then from the green, they came
>And found the stories of pone within the green
>Brave, the first of the guards
>Vannie, and her nights of bats
>Careful Watch, and her faithful fans
>And the furtive Rewind, so easily forgotten
>With the strength of writefags, they challenged the bumps
>Careful's mighty cute, peeled apart their stone emotions
>Vannie weaved great bat-love
>Brave unleashed a miasma of hugs and cuddles
>And Solemn Rain betrayed the pastes
>And the bumps were no more
>Thus began the Age of Royal Guard Mare General
>But soon the greens will fade
>And only bumps will remain
>>
>>30047148
I really have not read enough rgre stuff to have any idea how this will play out.


>>30046101
Nice big posts for you both. Hopefully no one will have to suffer though that again any time soon. Thanks for persevering.
>>
>>30045782
Kill yourself
>>
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>>30048042

Nice
>>
>>30030077
>Here lies Gayanon, he never scored.
>>
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>>30047148
>raised tails
>IN PUBLIC
HOW LEWD
CONTROL YOURSELVES MARES
>>
>>30048042
Why does Dark Souls make everything sound so damn cool?
>>
>>30047148
While as hot as getting turned on is for Anon, this motherfucker just tried to steal some bitching cookies, priorities ladies.
>>
>>30049279
Stealing cookies? To the dungeons.
>>
>>30047148
Why would random stallion x come into a stores that clearly has two ponies, guard ponies at that! and a damn huge alien and think "yeah this is the time to rob this store oh and free cookies"
Like what?
>>
>>30049879
They are really good cookies.
>>
>>30049879
>>30049892
and most petty criminals aren't too bright. probably didn't even bother to take a better look at the surroundings. Eyes only on the bag 'o bits and cookies.
>>
>>30049879
He didn't level perception
>>
>>30044397
>7:21 pm
>I have about two and a half hours before my shift it over.
>Too bad I really, really, really, need to go to the bathroom.
>I might have been working here for a few weeks now and I should be used to it, but it's kinda hard when it's ‘that’ thing.
>Wetting my diaper really isn’t a problem for me; actually, I am a bit amazed this one isn’t wet already.
>Messing it's a bit more… ARGH!
>The worst part is that STG. Stalwart is right here next to me and will notice.
>I am getting red just thinking about it.
>Maybe if I ignore it, it will go away until after I can change out of this diaper.
>Just need to keep my focus.
>>
>>30050162
>7:38 pm
>Okay, yeah. It didn’t work for as long as I hoped it would.
>Ugh! Gotta keep holding!
>Gotta keep holding!
>I keep shifting from side to side, trying desperately to keep myself from using my diaper.
>Why does this have to happen to me, of all ponies?
>In all my time working with SGT. Stalwart, he has never done anything like that in his diaper.
>I-I can’t do it in front of him. I need to keep holding on.
>I can feel the heat and pressure building up and my face getting redder.
>As I move my left hooves back I could hear a distinct hissing.
>Shocked, I stopped myself. I did NOT just do that without even noticing.
>Quickly placing my hoof on the padding, I find it still dry.
>Wait, if I didn’t, then?
>I turn towards SGT. Stalwart and notice his diaper now had a distinct yellow tint to it.
>Looking over at him, I could see he was looking away and his face was red.
>This was the first time I've ever seen him look embarrassed.
>Usually, my diaper is wet way before him, so he must feel awkward being the only one.
>Wow, he is too cute!
>Well, it looks like there is no point in me being embarrassed of doing something STG. Stalwart can, and has, done.
>Looking away, I begin to concentrate.
>I try to not make it obvious, what I am doing.
>After a bit of pushing, I can feel my tail lift up and the warm mess begins to enter my diaper.
>I hear the crinkling of the diaper as it pushes out to accommodate my mess.
>It feels like an eternity before it finally stops.
>When I am done with a long deep exhale, I look over to see SGT. Stalwart looking away.
>He is so nice, to try and give me some privacy so I don’t feel too embarrassed.
>>
>>30050168
>Suddenly, an odd idea crosses my mind.
>Making sure he isn’t looking, I press my hoof into the back of my diaper.
>My eyes go wide as I realize just how foreign this new sensation is.
>I should be disgusted, standing with my own mess pressed against me, but for some reason, this feels amazing.
>Then, I'm filled with thoughts of SGT. Stalwart standing next to me in his wet diaper.
>I wet my diaper a lot on the job, but now I think I may have actually been enjoying it more than I was letting myself believe.
>The thought of him being there next to me in his wet diaper is starting to get to me.
>There must be something really wrong with me, but I am really loving this part of my job.
>I can only smile as I look away. Just two more hours next to him.
>>
>>30050175
Get out shit lover, trash is the other direction.
>>
>>30050186
don't reply. just report and ignore.
>>
bump before going back to work. I'll try to keep checking via phone.
pg 6
>>
>>30050175
there is literaly a diaper pony thread in trash, they would probably even appreciate this
unless you are doing it to fuck with us
>>9169363
>>
>>30050536
Dude there's 30 anons in this thread, if not one of them comes to save it while you're busy it deserves to die
>>
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>>
>>30046087
>The mare’s ears swivel in your direction, perked and alert, but she complies.
>She’s alone, or appears to be.
“Anyone come with you?”
>“No.”
>Her soft voice betrays nothing.
“Were you followed?”
>“Not to my knowledge.”
>A little something that time.
>Sass?
>Not the answer you were hoping for, but beggars can’t be choosers.
>Neither can two-legged, freakishly tall fugitives wanted for assassination of rulers.
“Alright, turn around. Slowly.”
>The mare rotates and looks up at you, eyes flicking over the dilapidated factory that currently serves as your home.
>“Bulwark’s Cannery is across the street.”
>You shrug, wincing at the pain that shoots through your left arm and keeping the gun trained on the mare.
>She’s unarmed, or whatever the equivalent would be in pony terminology.
“Being careful never hurts. Wait there.”
>A doorway on the second floor leads to a loading platform overhanging the street.
>The winch and the pallet hanging from it were the only way into the factory from the street, once you collapsed a crate of cans in front of the main entry, and you doubt many knew about the sewer access below.
>>
>>30051593
>You drop the control lever, sending the pallet down to the street as the winch squeals distressingly.
>As it thuds to the ground, you motion with your pistol for the mare to climb aboard.
>Her eyes shift back and forth between you and the pallet, and she draws a deep breath before slowly pacing onto the wooden platform.
>The winch groans again, and soon you are standing face-to-face, more or less, with the pony that nearly killed you.
>She barely comes up to your waist.
>Now what.
>The wind whistles hollowly through the street, and you shuffle your feet, keeping the gun on her.
>The pony simply stares at you with her gray-blue eyes, as if sizing you up.
>She looks equal parts nervous and confused.
“Uh, you can go inside, now. Just don’t try anything.”
>The mare nods slightly, edging past you and onto the platform before entering your hideout.
>You stay a few paces behind her, pistol ready, not really sure what comes next.
>Why the hell did you not think this out earlier?
>You suppose you were just too excited at the prospect of finding someone who could hear the runes.
>That’s as good a place as any to start.
“Grab a seat if you want, I’ll see about getting the fire restarted.”
>There’s some matches in the filing cabinet, and as the mare sits hesitantly on the floor you glance quickly to its drawers.
>Ah, there they are.
“Now, what happened when y- “
>>
>>30051609
> She’s gone.
>Your gun is pointing at empty air where she was sitting a split second ago.
“Fuck.”
>A familiar mechanical click sounds behind you.
>“Just don’t try anything.”
>You freeze, having no desire to get shot again.
>“Put the pistol on the ground and take three steps forward.”
>Not much of a choice.
>You bend slowly, placing the weapon on the floor.
>You’re not exactly a bad shot, and you admittedly have seen far too many Clint Eastwood movies.
>But you are Anonymous, not the Man with No Name.
>Taking your three steps, you wait for her next command.
>A scuffing noise tells you that she’s picked up your pistol, and again there comes the sound of a weapon cocking.
>Wait a minute.
>“Turn around slowly and sit down.”
>When you come about, the pony is standing in the doorway by the platform.
>One forehoof is pointing your pistol at you, the other is just coming down from the winch lever.
>It clicks into rest from the “up” position, the winch staying silent thanks to its safety cutoff.
>God fucking damn it.
>You groan quietly as you slump to the floor, dejectedly folding your legs.
“So now what? Am I being detained?”
>The mare takes a step closer, determination now filling her gaze.
>“You’re going to tell me everything, and I mean everything, about you.”
>>
>>30051621
All I got for now. Going to be a busy few days coming up, so the updates may be short.
>>
>>30051639
Nuts.

We'll keep the light on.
>>
>>30051639
thanks for the update Whiskey, this ain't the fastest thread so going slow is no biggie, you finished them finals?
>>
>>30051639
Thanks for the cliffhanger-y update Whiskey. Looking forward to the next one.

>>30051809
It's likely his finals then celebratory booze that will occupy his coming days.
>>
>>30052508
>>30051809
Getting there on the finals. Booze afterward, but everything in moderation of course.
>>
>>30047148
>You move back into the same spot you were at, and Anon comes back inside, bag of bits in his pocket and the cookies in his arms.
>He puts them back, gets a single cookie, then walks back over to you both.
>"Hmmm, you guys find a perfume here or something? I like it."
>Brave grabs a random dress in her teeth and backs away.
>"I-I need to go try this on!"
>"Woah, that dress is sparkly."
>"I like sparkly!"
>She zips away, leaving you sitting on the ground and sweating like a pig.
>Yeah, maybe it's time for the armor to come off.
>You shed the pieces off, and it does help a bit.
>But all the fluff keeps it from really being cool.
>And all the heat just makes it harder to focus on something.
>"Sheesh, you know, you really oughta think about shaving or something. You look hot as hell."
>You're about to say the same back to him, but quickly realize it wasn't a compliment.
"Yeah, it's p-pretty hot."
>"When we get out of here, I'll grab a bunch of water for us."
>You nod, trying to cool yourself down and focus on your breathing.
>Hay, you hate this season...
>Can't just be those few weeks, can it?
>No, the weeks before AND after have to be JUST as bad, where every little thing will set you off.
>You shift slightly.
>A tingle moves down your back.
>HAY, why is it so BAD?
>All you did was see Anon!
>-Oh hay, it's BECAUSE of him!
>You remember hearing about it from other mares.
>That once you find your special somepony... THAT season gets worse.
>So much worse.
>Hay, it was one of the pros you'd tell yourself being single was great for.
>But you didn't think it would be THIS bad.
>"Something on your mind again? You know, you ponies are really bad at hiding things. ...I mean hell, I knew that guy was gonna try something the second he walked in here, that bastard."
>He smiles and stands proudly.
>"Guess being known as the "long-sloth" around here really gave me the advantage."
>His smile and posture slowly fades.
>"...Man the ponies here are dicks."
>>
>>30053594
The plot thickens, and reddens, and moistens.
>>
>>30053594
>long sloth
Kek. Blu with the save.
>>
>Posting a new pic in a herd thread instead of here. >>30045356
>>
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>>30053890
>new pic
>>
>>30053594
>"Hmmm, you guys find a perfume here or something? I like it."
Makes a good cologne, too. You mares should make sure to spread it all over Anon.
>>
>>30054001
>Using their own personal applicators. They leave snail trails right down anon's chest and thighs.
>>
>>30032557
...

>KNOCK.
>KNOCK.

>Ow.
>Sound hurts.

>KNOCK.
>...
>KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK

>You don't have it in you to bellow a response downstairs.
>You press your head into your pillow and wrap it around your ears.

>...

>You wake up a few hours later, the pain in your head nearly gone.
>Just after noon, you figure, from a quick glance out the window.
>It's later than you like to get up, but not bad for a night after a long watch.
>And for the amount of drinking you did.

>Your earlier guest left a note under your door, scrawled on the back of a donut-shop receipt:
>"safe. where are you???? need to talk... not about bullshit you told me about C... Im pissed but water under the bridge... about loose ends. Ill help at moons since I cant see my fuckin marefriend now... fuckin pos docs. anon"

>You sigh.
>Anon can wait.
>Especially if he's worked up.
>It's hard enough to understand ponies when they're not foaming at the mouth in addition to everything else.
>Some tiring chore like that is the last thing you want to do today.
>Careful's in good hooves, and if Anon doesn't care enough to check back with you, his "loose ends" can't be that important.
>No. Today, you will relax.
>>
>>30054243
I'm so glad you are here.
>>
>>30054243
Heyyy. It's my first day of vacation, and I can heavily relate to safety. Just get drink and fuck doing anything that first day or so.
>>
>>30054243
Safety is going to have to lift her tail and pleasure Anon while Careful recovers in the cuckshed.
>>
>>30050175
Kill yourself
>>
>>30053594
Oh, Brave just leaving your BFF to sweat and squirm. kek. Hopefully, Vannie realizes soon that Anon is a bit clueless.

>"Guess being known as the "long-sloth" around here really gave me the advantage."
>His smile and posture slowly fades.
>"...Man the ponies here are dicks."
??? Did you just catch on to an insult some ponies used to say to him in the past? Sorry, I don't get it.

>>30054001
>>30054039
kek. good job Anons.

>>30054243
Eyup, figured Anon would be pissed. Hopefully he works off some of his frustration while helping Moonie. This way he can return a bit calmer. Not saying Safety needs kid gloves but she was under quite a lot of stress.

Thanks for the updates guys! Looking forward to reading more.
>>
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>>30053594
I like where this is going. Are we about to see a very affectionate bat?
>>
>>30054243
Anon was already aware Safety was lying about Careful i'm not sure why he would be pissed at her about that. he knows she wouldn't be doing it just because.
also how the fuck did Anon find where she lives? he barely knew her name 12 hours ago
>>
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>>30054919
>Brave just leaving your BFF to sweat and squirm.

Now I got the image in my head of anon noticing their discomfort and going to get a big bag of ice for them both to hug and cuddle.

I need a drawfag
>>
>>
>>30054974
>led over to a dressing room
>both mares take turns riding him while sweet is in the next room
>>
>>30053594
Did sweet really not hear or notice any of that?
And even she's gotta twig to the scent eventually
>>
>>30050175
>10:00 pm
>Finally! This has been a really interesting shift, but I am glad it’s finally over.
>Now to wait until the princesses walk out of that room, relieve us of our duty, and I can change out of this diaper.
>10:10 pm
>Argh! Where are they!? Our shift ended a while ago and I really need to change!
>I begin to feel a bit annoyed, having to wait, when STG. Stalwart speaks to me.
>“Hey, Midnight. It looks like the princesses will be a bit late coming out. Our shift is technically over, so how about you go change and I’ll stand guard?”
>Wow, he is really nice.
>I know this is against regulation, but I really needed to go change.
Thanks, SGT. Stalwart! I’ll, um… be back really quickly.
> As I begin my way back to the changing room, I could hear him call out to me again.
>“Midnight, I know I have asked you before, but could you please drop the ‘SGT.’? Stalwart is more than fine.”
“Okay, Stalwart!” As I turn to get changed, I could see him smile at me.
>Why do I feel so strange today? I better hurry up so Stalwart can get changed too.
>>
>>30056372
>10:22 pm
>I finally make it back to the changing room.
>It's a small, well lit room that contains a padded table, cabinet, and bathroom.
>Okay, I better do this quickly and get back to Stalwart as fast as I can.
>I open the cabinet and remove the package of diapers in my size.
>Pulling it out, I find the box of wipes.
>lying down on the padded table I get to work un-taping the used diaper and cleaning myself off.
>After a lot of wipes, I finally managed to clean my coat off.
>A fun reminder to avoid doing this on the job again, no matter how great it was.
>I toss the used diaper into the nearby trash.
>As I put the box of wipes back into the cabinet, I hear something inside fall over.
>Looking inside, I see a little white bottle. I pull it out and open it. A familiar sweet scent flows out.
>Wait, that’s the same smell that comes from the room the princesses enter.
>I turn the bottle around to find the label says “Foal Powder.” So, that is why it smells so familiar.
>But why does that room smell like foal powder in the first place?
>Could it be that maybe the princesses… Nah, there is no way!
>I quickly take the thought out of my mind.
>I begin to place the bottle back, but a new thought enters my mind.
>I swiftly grab the package of diapers, turn around, and get back to the padded table.
>I mean, technically I am still on duty until the princesses relieve us, so I would need to be in my full uniform.
>>
>>30056376
>I can try and explain it to myself all I want, but I just really want to try the foal powder this time.
>I diaper myself, this time using the foal powder.
>I really didn’t think it would make much of a difference, but for some reason I feel really warm inside.
>I really need to use this stuff whenever I get ready for a shift from now on.
>Remembering that I needed to get back to Stalwart, I return the supplies back to the cabinet and return to my post as fast as I can.
>>
do not engage
report and ignore
>>
>>30056456
>>30056456
At this point, I am just curious if the faggot is multiple dudes, or just one persistent fucker with a lot of proxies.
>>
>>30056722
The way he almost consistently messes up "sgt" makes me think it's one person.
>>
>>30057009
Then I guess he just has a bunch of proxies then.
>>
>>30055397
he appears to be pissed about something else. Not the lies.

As far as her address maybe anon ask for the location from the guard hq or something.
>>
>>30057839
my point about the lie was if he already knew and wasn't bothered/pissed by it, and your writing a note to someone with limited space why bring it up?
why not focus on the important matter you need her for?
Like "hey safe where you at? we need to sort shit with Honey, meet at moonies, doc's keeping me away from Care BS ~Anon"

like don't waste space and be vague, ESPECIALLY with Safety First, Anon should know better
>>
>>30056456
>Someone is posting guard stories in the guard thread which has something in it that -I- don't like?!
>Report it! Reeee!
Do you have autism?
>>
>>30058315
Trash has a board for itself, stay there.
>>
yeah CW i haven't forgotten her, i'm still waiting for the scene with Honey Hive.
>foal in the room alone, shivering in the un-heated home, the wood having run out days ago
>the blankie doing little to keep the chilling bite off her hoovies
>playing with the sparse few toys not already sold away
>Already accustom to ignoring the strange sounds coming from her momma's room
>the thumping, groaning, crying, smacks and bangs
>momma says its okay,
>she's just doing a different job now
>but you hear her crying a lot
>even when not doing the job

just ruin me CW, i need to feel again
>>
>>30058390
....because when Anon finds out we will help the everloving shit out of them?
>>
>>30058406
well Anon currently has one broken arm and i'm guessing little more than pocket change... i doubt he got a pay check before all this went down.

helping them back on their hooves, While the obvious goal, starts the age old problem of how lifting a person from poverty isn't easily solved. (without mad bank)
A mare who deals with bee's .. in Canterlot... in winter.
The best we can offer is handout really.
>>
>>30058315
Stop coming here already you dickless wonder. Bats, gays, diapers, you never miss a fucking chance to be that one loud obnoxious contrarian to everything. Thanks to the gookmoot 4chan has four designated shitposting boards. Just fuck off to one of them and never come back you dumb faggot.
>>
bump from 9
>>
When did maskedpony find this thread and what will it take for his pamper fetished ass to get out.
>>
>>30058475
Kinda interested to see how pony healthcare plays out comparatively in the worlds that Blu and CW are creating, seeing as they're both taking place in the same city.
>>
>>30058475
To be fair, Honey could be making a killing being a whorse.
She might be making more money than the rest of the cast, it is Canterlot after all, and high class hookers are a thing.
>>
>>30060768
Ahem, courtesans. Let's not insult the poor mare.
>>
>>30054243
>...
>"CHEEP CHEEP CHEEP."
>You hadn't had long to loiter by the door before a cacophony of attention-seeking chirruping met your ears from across the room.

"...oh! Cheep cheep cheep. Cheep. Cheep cheep..."
>You think your apology made it through to your five zebra finches, housed in an extra-large cage in the lounge, which you now trot over to.
>They still don't seem very pleased.
>You've been home twelve whole hours, after all, and you haven't let them out of their cage so large it can only be taken in and out of the house in pieces.
>The cage they can fly freely in you paid big for, specifically so they would be comfortable and entertained even while you were on duty overnight.
>"CHEEP CHEEP!"
"Cheep cheep... cheep."

>You open the cage.
>They let loose a small barrage of shit and take flight, zipping out of the cage and to their favorite spots in the house.
>For the little one -- you don't give them names more specific than that, as you believe they name themselves, and you don't wish to impose -- this place is your left shoulder, under your mane.
>He perches there, gets extra fluffy, and accompanies you for your morning routine.
>...or afternoon routine, as it is.

>Before long, you're lounging on your couch, sipping decaffeinated coffee, munching animal crackers (you're breaking your fast with them, so they're "breakfast," right?), and doing light reading: 'Luna: Her Exile and Return. Facts, Fiction, and Rumors!'
>The sun shines in bright through the windows, reflecting off the snow outside.
>Your birds keep you all the company you could want.
>You think you'll keep this up a while.
>>
>>30060744
The Princesses pay for everything. They're fuckin rich because they're Princesses. I've thought this out.
>>
>>30060875
Well now. Who is this?
>>
>>30060744
>>30060886
Anon, mentioned earlier in the story that he's getting a "new citizen" stipend but wants to get a job. Another thing one of the MILFs takes issue with during the confrontation outside Moonie's shop.

Thanks for the update CW!

>>30060875
>>"CHEEP CHEEP CHEEP."
Safety and her minions. muahahah!
kek

bmp pg 8
>>
resting pegasus
decaffeinated coffee?
chirping birds around

bmp pg 9
>>
>>30060875
Aww, birdpone has bird pets. Also animal crackers are the shit.
>>
>>30056383
>10:32 pm
>I swiftly make it back to the hallway where my post is.
>As I turn around the corner, I could hear somepony laughing.
>I stop myself as I quietly peer into the hall.
>It's a night guard laughing at Stalwart.
>Neither of them are lowering their voices, making it easy to listen in on the conversation.
>“...I have been seeing action instead of being stuck with this cushy job.”
>“you don’t remember our last exchange? It ended with your big head getting even bigger.”
>“Wanna go again, soggy diaper boy?”
>“You know what I think, I-” Stalwart paused for a few seconds.
>He looked like he was thinking something over, and then continued, his voice full of confidence.
>“You know what, you aren’t even worth it. Now if you excuse me, I have a job to do.”
>I couldn’t believe he didn’t even get angry at the pony.
>If that was me, I would have probably snapped a while ago. Even though Stalwart didn’t respond, that jerk kept laughing at him.
>That’s it, I can’t take this anymore.
>I take off my helmet and fly towards the two of them.
>“Hahaha, so it is true! You’re nothing more than a spineless, worthless pony that can't even-”
>I chucked my helmet at his head before he is able to finish his sentence.
>It made a loud clang from the impact and the jerk goes down into a heap quickly.
>I land and continued towards Stalwart.
>He looks pretty confused with what just happened.
>I hope I didn’t do anything to get us in trouble.
>Stalwart kinda scolds me for attacking another guard, but he really seemed happy that idiot couldn’t run his mouth anymore.
>I offer to take the unconscious pony to the infirmary.
>>
>>30063472
>Stalwart loads him on top of my back and I quickly fly him over.
>When I arrive to drop him off, I tell them what Stalwart told me to say, about him obstructing our duty.
>At first, I thought it was because of my rank that they didn’t ask questions.
>But as I left, I could hear one of the nurses say, “Not him again.”
>So, I'm guessing this isn’t his first time doing something stupid.
>I make it back to my post and tell Stalwart he can get changed now.
>But for some reason he said he was okay.
>Maybe I am not the only weird one here after all?
>I take my post and continue the watch.
>>
>>30063479
>11:03 pm
>The princesses finally exit, and we are relieved from duty.
>Before we leave to change and go home, Princess Luna hands me a list and tells me I need to come in early next week to restock the room with Stalwart.
>I am not too sure what that means, but at least I finally get to see what’s inside of it.
>Stalwart looked a bit nervous when he found out, but he seemed to have lightened up and started laughing after a few seconds.
>He walks with me to the changing room. As we arrive, I stop.
“You should go in first. After all, my diaper is still dry.”
>He smiles, “Thanks, Midnight. Be out real quick.”
>He enters, and in a few minutes, exits.
>It's so strange to see him without his armor or diaper on.
>Usually, he stays on after I leave, so I never see him outside of work.
>“Alright. Midnight, you’re up.”
>I nod as I enter the room, it takes me a few minutes to get out of my armor and place it on the stand in the room.
>I then take the unused diaper off, but it feels like a waste, throwing it away.
>I kinda want to keep it, but that would be really weird, even for me. So, I have to toss it away.
>I exit the room, expecting no pony to be there, but instead i'm greeted by Stalwart, waiting for me.
>I walk up next to him, smiling.
>I am really happy to see him there.
>Together, we exit the castle and continue to our homes.
>11:42 pm
>It was a long walk back to my house, but Stalwart was there to keep me company most of the trip.
>I think I really like him and I think I really like diapers.
>Or maybe, I'm just tired from today.
>I climb into bed, thinking about myself and Stalwart together in diapers alone.
>That thought made me really happy, but it seems also out of reach.
>Well, there is always next week.
>I sigh as I slowly drift off to sleep.
>>
>>30063472
Fucking leave already you cancerous asshole. Side note, how the hell are you getting past the mods?
>>
>>30063489
don't feed it (You)s report and ignore/hide
>>
>>30063513
At this point I am just morbidly curious if Gookmoot fucking around lately has actually messed up the mods job.
>>
>>30063513
>>30063518
>check threat
>it's back
>scroll past
Feelsgoodman. Keeps the thread bumped at least, if there's anything good that comes of it.
>>
>>30064012
That's one way to look at it. Though I don't want to encourage any more. There is a place for that stuff in /trash/.
>>
>>30064690
Not that anon, but naaah mate. Just ignore and scroll on. Giving them any attention bad or good is what they want. They fill this thread with stuff to scroll past we make a new one after bump limit. Not a big deal.
>>
>>30064978
You dont ignore shitposters only, report and ignore, just plain ignoring is just as bad as actively encouraging them. And it is a big deal when newfags coming by think we're okay with faggots in diapers. That isn't good, ergo, talk down to the cancer and cut it out. Best of both worlds.
>>30064012
We want regular bumps or even comment bumps, not literal trash bait.
>>30064690
Yes. This. This is the correct response to the samefag. I mean this guy by the way>>30064012
>>30064978
>>
>>30065122
Wasn't a samefag on that one. Just remarking that the only semi-useful thing to come out of that garbage story is bumping the thread.
>>
>>30065501
Except we don't need it bumped when the shitposter is posting. We can keep it better than that garbage. The fucker does it when the thread is on page 5 or 6, when people are paying attention anyways. tldr, we don't need trash to bump a thread with people already paying attention to it.
>>
>>30065516
Shame shitposters can't be more mindful and bump properly. Though I guess that comes with the role.
>>
>>30065566
And the dub dubs speak the truth.
>>
>>30051621
>Some time later…
>You are usually confident in your ability to read ponies.
>This is one of those times that you honestly can’t tell if someone is telling the truth or bullshitting you.
“Let me start from the top, and correct me if I get anything wrong.”
>Anonymous is still sitting on the floor, though now he’s adopted a lounging sprawl, despite the pistol you’re aiming at him.
>You begin to repeat his story, as if hearing yourself speak the words would make them easier to believe.
“You ‘appeared’ in Equestria one day, but you aren’t sure how.”
>He shrugs, still nursing his arm.
>You feel a little sorry about that.
>Still, he’s not dead, and at the present moment a high-profile fugitive.
>“Yeah, turns out we humans don’t know a whole lot about magic and shit.”
>His voice has held a level of spite ever since you began your interrogation.
>Obviously he had intended to be in your position, but from what you’ve seen of him so far, he’s not a particularly cunning criminal.
“Right, now here’s the part I’m still not understanding: you were a guest of the monarchy there, given a room in the castle and had your needs taken care of, in return for knowledge about your world.”
>“Alien shows up and the gubberment wants to know all about them. What’s so hard to understand about that?”
“I was getting to that.”
>Your harsh tone shuts him up.
>The night won’t last forever and you’ve got a long way back home.
“So after you’ve been given an easy living on a silver platter, you decide to pack up and leave, traveling to Damwall, of all places.”
>He opens his mouth to explain himself again, but you cut him off.
“All because of some kind of game you played back in your own world?”
>“Well when you put it like that, of course it isn’t going to sound like that great of an idea,” he mumbles, apparently having had the same thought before.
>>
>>30065588
>His descriptions were strange.
>Games that were played not on physical tables or boards, but interacted with through something resembling a mirror.
>That part doesn’t concern you; it’s a trivial secondary detail, one that doesn’t pertain to your primary investigation.
>The world in the game he described, however, troubled you immensely.
>A world crumbling in a time of plague, an empress murdered, a hero that pulls the empire back from the edge.
>More disturbing are the names: the city of Dunwall, the nation of Gristol, even a few street names bore resemblance to those in your own world, or so he told you.
>One name sticks out above them all.
>The Outsider, a bored, indifferent demigod who enjoyed giving supernatural powers to mortals, and watch to see what they would do with them.
>You are tempted to discard it all as a ridiculous fiction, but one thing stops you.
“The Void. Tell me again what it’s like.”
>In your world, there are no descriptions of it.
>You’ve heard stories, of course; of witches performing hideous rituals in the forgotten places of the city, strange and unexplained lights spotted by ships far out at sea.
>But nopony could explain what the Void actually looks like, and if they could, then they were very tightlipped.
>Anonymous heaves a sigh as he sits up.
>“It’s strange, y’know. Floating chunks of rock, buildings, items you remember from your own world. It’s quiet, no wind or anything. Sometimes there’s whales floating way off. It’s just empty, like a winter sky in every direction.”
>>
>>30065593
>Jesus Anon that was corny.
>She’s the one with the gun though, so just answer her questions and maybe you can get out of this without getting shot again.
>More likely you’ll be back in Coltridge before sunrise.
>The mare has gone quiet, and you look up at her.
>Her eyes are still locked on you, still watching you, but behind them you can tell she’s deep in thought.
>She probably doesn’t believe you.
“Look, I know this all sounds cra-”
>“What happened.”
“What?”
>“In the game. What happened in the story?”
>Okay, detective, whatever you want.
“Well, like I said the world was similar to yours, but there’s a few major differences. The game started off with the Empress being murdered and her daughter abducted.”
>“Empress Coltwin didn’t have any foals.”
“Yeah, no shit, that’s why I said there were differences.”
>The pony shoots you an icy glare, and you continue in a subdued tone.
“After that, the main character discovered that high-ranking members of the government plotted to kill the Empress, and went about eliminating them and restoring the daughter to the throne.”
>“And I suppose the Lord Regent is behind the murder of my Empress, is that right?”
>You hold up your hands in a placating posture.
“I didn’t say that. In fact, in the game he outright says it to the main character’s face during a torture session before he escapes from prison. Even put it down in a voice recording.”
>Come to think of it, why didn’t the main character just grab that recording while escaping and distribute it?
>Guess it would have made for a short game.
>>
>>30065604
“Nothing like that happened to me. I got out within a couple of days and nobody said anything to me before I escaped. Anyway, after that the similarities end, and your guess is as good as mine toward what’s going on around here.”
>“So, as far as I or anyone else knows, you are the assassin.”
>This fucking mare.
“I didn’t say that I-”
>You pause to breathe deeply and collect yourself.
>Yelling isn’t going to help you here.
“Like I already told you. I was making my way through Damwall Tower’s garden, where the Empress had invited me to dinner. When I arrived at the gazebo, she was dead, stabbed. No one else in sight. A moment later, the guards arrived and arrested me.”
>“How unfortunate for you.”
>The mare doesn’t mean it, judging by her voice.
“Look, you don’t have to believe me, but this is what I’m saying. The real killer is still out there. What’s more, I think there’s something bigger than an assassination going on. No ruler is ever killed for no reason, and you tell me, what reason would I have for killing the Empress? She welcomed me, just like the princesses in Equestria. She was good to me, I had everything I wanted here. Food, shelter, unlimited access to the Academy of Natural Philosophy, even my own office there.”
>You figure you’ve talked enough.
>Now it’s her move.
>She just stands there, pointing your pistol at you, gears turning in her head.
“You going to arrest me or…”
>“Is there anyone who would want to frame you?”
>Alright, now we’re getting somewhere.
>Sort of.
>The truth is you don’t know.
>>
>>30065623
>You got on well enough with the other members of the Empress’ court.
>The royal spymaster, now Lord Regent, was always polite and curious to learn more about Earth.
>The High Overseer was a bitch, but you suppose that had to do with you being an alien.
>She probably thought you were some Void demon, though she never voiced such a belief in public.
>Various nobles you’d met at banquets were always fascinated, though you got the feeling they saw you as more of a charming oddity than an equal.
>The scientists at the Academy were by far your favorite company.
>You had a decently mechanical mind, and fortunately Earth technology was leagues ahead of what these ponies were dealing with, for the most part.
>The hands didn’t hurt either.
>As a result, you were something of a genius when it came to mechanical tinkering and experimenting, resulting in you being offered an office at the Academy.
>“Well, is there?”
>You wrap up your memory and address the guard mare.
“High Overseer Cantle, maybe. She was the most openly opposed to my being in the Empress’s presence, or in the Empire altogether. In the game, it was the Lord Regent who organized the whole thing, but I never knew your world’s equivalent to disagree with the Empress. They were both at a loss as to how to put an end to the Plague.”
>The pony nods softly, and you swear you can see smoke coming out of her ears as she works her brain overtime.
>You really don’t want to spend the rest of the night at gunpoint, and try to hurry things along, gambling that you’ve said enough to stay out of state custody for now.
“Well, we going or not, cause it’s a long walk to Coltridge and my legs are cramping just sitting here.”
>The mare doesn’t seem to appreciate gallows humor, but in the withering look she shoots you, you can see something else.
>Uncertainty.
>>
>>30065651
>She slowly backs toward the loading platform door, relaxing the pistol but staying wary.
“If you’re looking for leads, I’d check my office at the Academy. I kept all of my notes and a journal in a hidden safe beneath the desk.”
>Anon, buddy, why are you telling her this?
“The combination is ‘4-2-7.’ Although if someone was interested in seeing me take the fall for this, I think the general state of the office might tell you more.”
>She’s almost out the door.
>Shit, you almost forgot.
“Wait! The shrine, the rune. What happened to you? Did you see it? You did, didn’t you, otherwise you wouldn’t be so intere-”
>“I’m not answering anything from you. But I will want more answers.”
>With that, she rounded the corner, a light clattering signaling her departure.
>You stand up and stretch – the leg cramps weren’t a joke – and shuffle over to the door.
>Laying on the platform is your pistol, and the guard mare is nowhere to been seen in the darkened street.
>Spooky.
>You pick up the pistol and tuck it under your cloak.
>You’re still a free man, and you’ll probably be safe here a while longer.
>Although you’re not entirely certain of it, you might have made an ally tonight.
>And you will want plenty of answers too.
>>
>>30065660
Enter our green friend. From this point on I'm going to be branching away from the game's story for the most part. Can't have our guard mare retreading an old tale.
>>
>>30060875
I hope Anon does fuck Safety. Pegasi are sexy as fuck.
>>
>>30065670
That was quite meta. I'm curious to see what you have in store for the little pone, Outsider.
>>
>>30065660
The plot thickens
>or rather, radically changes direction
>>
>>30063489
>>30063518
It's not against the rules to post green stories. Sure, that particular story is bad as hell. But so what? Just scroll past it, that's what I did.
>>
>>
>>30067397
And you must be the faggot writing trying to subvert attention to your shitposting, I can tell because your using the same excuse the regular faggot shitposters tried using, your not wanted here, go back to the trash where you belong.
>>
>>30065670
Interesting. Solemn seemed to wrap her brain around the alternate reality aspects well enough. Probably because of her initial conversations with The Outsider. Good Job Whiskey. Looking forward to seeing the next update.
>>
Questioning Solemn
Anonymous not too blame?
Off to seek answers

pg 7
>>
>>30068395
We'll get a little more of her thoughts soon enough
>>
File: Guardsmare Derpy.png (247KB, 1280x1240px) Image search: [Google]
Guardsmare Derpy.png
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>>
>>
Reee where's B&V
>>
File: Solemn rain.png (310KB, 976x927px) Image search: [Google]
Solemn rain.png
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Have a WIP solemn rain
>>
>>30071019
Thanks. I love watching artists practice their craft. I often find myself mesmerized as I see something appear upon a blank page; almost like magic.
>>
>>30071019
Sweet
>>
>>30071019
Love your work Neuro. The ponies are adorable and seeing a little behind the scenes action is awesome.
>>
File: New Canvas.png (163KB, 786x546px) Image search: [Google]
New Canvas.png
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>>30071071
Shit anon how did you know I used my magical pone powers to make art?
>>
>>30068816
Ya know, I appreciate haikus as bumps. Have a (you) Anon, you qt
>>
>>30071347
Aww, thanks Anon. I try to do more than just a simple page bump when I can.
>>
>>30071155
because your poners are too qt
>>
>>30071155
Nice face reveal, you're a cute
>>
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>>30071535
Anon pls
>>30071153
I'm glad you anons like my 'dorble poners
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>>30072058
Cute af my dude. She's missing a tail though
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i want to drink mead with this mare
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>>30072448
That would be fun, maybe lead a drinking game.
>>
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>>30073097
or nine
>"i told ya i could outdrink ya laddie, you dunnit stand a chance!"
>she cheers and holds her mug up
>"aint nopony able to outdrink me!"
>she downs the whole thing down, then wraps a leg around your shoulder
>"twas a good try though, mate! i havent drunken like this in years!"
>she laughs and has her mug refilled
>one long swig, then she looks at you again
>"in fact, i havent had this much o' fun in a long while!"
>she scoots a bit closer to you and finishes the rest of it
>a hoof moves over your leg and rests there
>"it dont have to end so soon, dunnit?"
>>
>>30073726
>Wake up the next morning stuck together by the dired fluids of amore.
>The large viking guard mare gives you a few good wallops for taking advantage of her drunkenness and immediately leaves.
>6 months later there's a knock on your door.
>A large stallion viking is standing there with the guard mare. Her stomach distended with what ever unholy spawn your seed planted there.
>The the viking states that according to their law she is now your mate and responsibility.
> The mare gives you a look that says the next time you fall asleep. you won't be waking up.

>May as well ask her what her name is.
>>
>Foreword:

>Following are the writings of Lord Anonymous Blankslate; explorer, entrepreneur, and gentleman; dating from the Thirtieth Day of the Season of Winter, 810th Year of Our Princess, to the First of the Season of Spring, 811.

>Herein lie accounts of sights, sounds, and super-heroic deeds so spectacular to survey, even second-hoof, that they surely may spur in our readers severe and shattering sensitivities of shock, stupefaction, and -- indeed -- even arousal of a sexual nature.
>However, such anecdotes may also arouse that rotten element of the psyche known as skepticism, an quality shared in equal measure by intellexuals, dastards, and others who doubt -- neigh, fear -- the authority and autocracy of our God-Princess.

>To quash any such queries, we, who have published these journals publicly for public perusal, give our authoritative assurance that these accounts are absolutely authentic.
>We take no pride in these claims; we wish merely to educate you, our readers, with utmost accuracy as to what lies in the pages ahead of you.
>If one sentence, neigh, one word in these accounts is found, undeniably, to be false, then may we both hang for our frightful fraudulence, our devilish deception!

>HAWKTHORNE AND HAYHOOF PUBLICATIONS PRESENT:
>JOURNALS OF LORD ANONYMOUS: THE YAKYAKISTAN EXPEDITION
>>
>>30073975
>new episodes tomorrow.

Gotta batton down the hatches to keep the thread alive for this.
>>
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>>30073975
ITS HAPPENING
>>
>>30073961
wait a sec, if she's drunk and a Viking then having sex while drunk would and should be a normal thing for her, though I am totally for Anon being a family man due to some law or something when she finds out its his.
>>
>>30073975
Neat
>>
Goodnight bump.
>>
>>30078255
Now is not the time for sleep anon
>>
at least the diaper green kept the thread active, now we're back to content-less bumps
>>
>>30079288
Content-less bumps you say? Hang on a sec
>>
>>30028626
>The world has always seemed more beautiful from the air, you think as you soar towards the coast.
>The spell-enhanced flight harness fitted to your wings boosts your cruising speed well beyond what ordinary pegasi are capable of, and admittedly the chance to use one was part of the pull factor for you to sign up for the Air Guard.
>Your section flies in a tight diamond with you at the leading tip, nestled into the tail of the larger diamond formed by the other three sections.
>Sixteen ponies, drafting off the leading section for an easier flight to the operating zone.
>Controlling weather was something that required special training and school, but pegasi magic gave each pony an inborn resistance to powerful winds and storms.
>Flying in close formation allows pegasi to consolidate this ability, punching through weather that would otherwise force groundings.
>You feel the air temperature drop sharply, and the scent changes from comforting spring fields to cold, damp and unwelcoming salt.
>The coast is coming up.
“Blue Section. Falling out and turning north, over.”
>“Copy, Blue Leader,” came Nimbus’s voice, now cool and emotionless, as it always became in the air.
>“The Oculus should be a ten minute’s flight up the coast, approximate relative bearing 15 degrees. Start broadcasting your presence at five minutes. Wouldn’t want any blue-on-blue.”
“Roger, Flight Leader. Good hunting.”
>With that, you reach to your helmet and move the communicator selector from “All-Comm” to “Sec-Comm.”
“Blue Section on my mark, drop below formation and execute 90 degrees turn left. Three, two, one, mark.”
>You nose below the group of ponies, feeling the buffeting of the wind increase as you drop out of their slipstream, and angle to follow the gray strip of wave-lashed sand far below.
>>
>>30080076
>When the turn is complete, you swivel your head to ensure your section is with you, and raise a hoof to check the complex flight watch strapped over your sleeve.
>Eying the inlaid compass, you nudge right until 15 degrees points directly ahead of you, then activate the stopwatch next to it.
>“Clouds ahead, ma’am.”
>Blue Two, Nimble Sparrow, was a window-washer back in Manehattan.
>He’s always very attentive to weather patterns, claiming it was useful to avoid being slammed against skyscrapers in the city’s swirling wind currents.
“Alright everypony, stay tight. We’re going in.”
>A series of affirmatives reaches your ears as you feel the section in behind you, and you tense your wing muscles a little tighter, readying for the impact.
>The dark wall looms rapidly larger, and just before hitting it you lower your head and give a powerful beat of your wings.
>It’s as if you’re in a mob, and ponies are shoving you violently from every direction, including above and below.
>Rain streaks your goggles, nearly blinding you.
>The screaming wind tugs at your wings, daring you to keep them unfurled.
>You can hear the strained breaths of your section as they fight to hold formation.
>Intermittently you check your compass to make certain you’re on course, struggling to make headway in the lashing storm.
>As you look to your compass once more, you realize it’s been nearly five minutes since you left Nimbus’s squadron.
>You try to stay level and switch your communicator dial to “All-Comm” once again.
“T.M.S. Oculus, this is Air Guard Blue Section, on final approach.”
>Above the howling of the wind, you hear only static in your headset.
>“T.M.S. Oculus, this is Air Guard Blue Section, requesting confirmation of approach, come in.”
>Nothing.
>Dread is creeping up from your stomach and into your chest, making it hard to keep your already strained breathing steady.
“T.M.S. Oculus, do you copy…”
>>
>>30080093
All I've got for now, got parties to attend.
>>
>>30080100
Thanks for the green Whiskey.
>got parties to attend
Absolutely degenerate. I bet you have friends too.
>>
>>30080508
m-maybe a few
>>
Is blu kill
>>
LIVE
>>
>>30081071
Man I remember having friends, have fun Whiskey.
But don't burn yourself out with two greens at once.
>>
>>30082358
The birdpone one is probably gonna be on hold for a while, just something I imagined while experiencing a bit of writer's block. Solemn's story is my main focus
>>
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>>30081660
not yet
just got over something, and a worse thing took its place
blog posts aside, its made getting into the groove of writing difficult
>>
>>30083023
dang man, that hurts. I'd give you a hug if i could.
>>
Blu had the achoos
Whiskey's parties to attend
Greens will return friend

Bump 7
>>
>>30083135
Two men hugging each other? Gay.
>>
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>>30083637
>men
you'll never know for sure
>>
>>30083637
meh. I'd still do it.

no homo
>>
>>30083658
>Whiskey is actually a bottle of Jack
>>
>>30083776
Yeah, nothing wrong with a bro-hug.
>>
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>>30086151
Now make the pregnancy stick by powerfucking her against the wall standing up.
>>
>>30086151
Aww, I love it! Really captures that moment in the dress shop perfectly.
>>
>>30086151
daww.

My only problem is her mouth feels a lilttle... long/wide for just seeing one side.

Kinda looks like she can open it up like pac-man.
>>
Pretty picture post
Inspiration from the green
What else will we see

Bump 8
>>
>>30086414
What that mouth do
>>
>>30086151
Nice work senpai, thought you'd be too busy in the Glim thread for us pleps
>>
>>30086151
>>30086292
>>30086414
>>30088079
you know the picture is old, right
hes still dead
>>
>>30088143
He's been in the glimmer thread all week, dude ain't dead
>>
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>>30088260
ded
>>
>>30088260
>glimmer
If there's anything worse than death, it's that.
>>
>>30088260
That is as close to dead as its possible to get.
>>
I'm separated from the rig for the next day or so, but brainstorming for Solemn while I'm away.
>>
>>30089638
Good luck m8
>>
This thread looks like it could use some green. Gimme some time and I'll have shits to post.

You like vampires and nightguards? Nightguard vampires? OC hell? Go to https://pastebin.com/u/Notonefuck and read through "Going bump in the night" so what I'm about to post makes sense. Old fic, but it's revived.
>>
>>30090127
appreciate it.
>>
>>30090127
SOON
>>
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>>30090127
>https://pastebin.com/LtzyURfR
W H E N
>>
>>30090127
FOR REAL THIS TIME,

Synopsis: After being pulled into Equestria and having the ambient magic reverse your sleep cycle, you're assigned one of Luna's vampire guards since you're technically an endangered species and need "protection" as they say. But when word gets out that you feed your guard your own potent blood with no downsides on your part, suddenly every vampony around wants a piece of you. Literally. Good bye, calm, idyllic life...

Chapter 8
Continues from https://pastebin.com/QNaJp8EV

“Bitch!”
>You kick the trashcan next to the gem shop with a furious yell, sending the now dented container across the street and throwing garbage everywhere.
>Umbra manages to look up at you past the red in her face. “That’s littering, Anon,” she says with a small frown.
>You’d give her a scowl, but the burning in your ears tells you that your face is still flushed with embarrassment. Why did that fucing unicorn have to do that? To hell with her.
“Yeah, yeah. I know. When did you become a cop?” You ask her with a raised brow.
>Umbra mimics your expression as she starts walking. “Someone needs to keep you in line. You know a real cop would have nailed you for that,” she says, the red tint on her face fading. “Speaking of cops, we should probably get these notes,” she shakes her wing with the notebook clutched under it, “to the police and let them take it from here. We haven't got the same clearance they do for criminal investigations.”
You offer a shrug. “Fair enough.”
>The trip to the front of the Artisan’s District is a slow one, but it’s far less nerve wracking than the trip inside.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

1/x
>>
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>>30091105
>“Well, that sure was fun…” Umbra snarks to no one as you and her exit the main office of the Canterlot PD. Her hoofsteps are heavy and annoyed on the cracked concrete ground, making a distinct *clink!* sound from her shoes.
“At least it’s out ofoff our hands,” you offer with a shrug, idly playing with the tiny red gem now hanging around your neck on a simple string. “We did our part. Now it’s up to the cops to do the rest. Catching some burglar seems a little above the guard, doesn't it? Even if it’s expensive stuff being stolen.”
>Umbra looks backwards at the police station as you and her walk. The ugly, concrete building stands in sharp contrast to the usual grand architecture of the of the Equestrian capital, making one wonder why it was made that way.
>She returns her attention forward with an irritated click of her tongue. “Call me crazy,” the little vampire starts, “but I get the feeling that the investigation is not going anywhere anytime soon.” She’s silent for a few more steps before chiming in again. “Something just seems off with that whole mess, you know what I mean? The PD might be good at keeping the busy work off the guard, but I get the feeling that this situation is going to go beyond the police can do alone.”
“Oh well,” you reply, not really caring, and even a bit happy to be out of that obvious fiasco in the works. “It’s their problem now. Poor suckers.”

2/x
>>
>>30091120
>“Issues the PD can't handle tend to get a run through the guard if they’re bad enough,” Umbra dryly quips with a twitch of her wings. “It’s just takes time, which is why I questioned why I had to sit through two hours worth of questioning with some sleepy detective after running back all the way back to talk to Glimmer, again!” She stops to take a much needed breath. “This is just going to snowball and hit the guard anyway.”
“I thought you said the guard doesn't have the same clearance the police do for criminal investigations?” You ask, the shrug uncaringly. “Good thing you're not technically on active duty, and thus, WILL be missed by that gay shit.” you grin back to her. “I can do with less crazy, thank you.”
>“‘Fraidy cat.”
>You debate trying to trip your guard, but reluctantly toss the idea out when you realize that you’ll probably just bruise your foot on her foreleg.
“Yeah, well… Fuck you,” you reply, suddenly finding the cobblestone street more interesting than Umbra.
>“Oh my Anon~!” She says, mockingly scandalized. “Right out here in the street? How forward,” she titters behind a hoof like a schoolgirl. “But if you insist…”
>Your palm is violently introduced to your face as you feel heat beginning to surface on your cheeks. Why did you not see that response coming.
“I really do hate you sometimes,” you grumble, dodging around a walking earth pony wearing a backpack. “Why do you feel the need to make me suffer?”

3/x
>>
>>30091128
>“If you consider the chance for a romp with me to be “suffering” then I don’t think I can really do worse, seeing as how you’re obviously insane,” she sniffs. “Really, suggesting such a thing to a mare then chickening out and not following through?”
“You’re a mare?”
>Umbra blinks, realization flashing across her face. “Ohhhhhhh so that’s why you want me. Did Bright check your eyes when you saw her last?”
>Again, your face burns so red that you're sure it’s luminescent. You were sure that one would trip her up at least a little.
>Umbra notices your internal plight and stifles a giggle. “I’ve been at the banter game for a lot longer than you have, Anon. You’ll win one eventually.” She bumps your thigh with her armored flank, a *clink* sound following. “But there’s no shame in losing to an expert like me.”
“Expert at what? Being a pain in my ass?” you mumble, knowing she heard when you see her tuft-tipped ear flick. “Where are you leading me, anyway?” You ask at a normal volume, looking around the somewhat unfamiliar street you’ve found yourself on.
>It’s filled with older, rougher buildings with a number of gruff ponies around, a noteworthy number being both day and night guards. From somewhere, a band can be heard playing. At the very end of the street is a fenced drop-off right off the side of Canterlot, meaning you're at the edge of the city. Even the usual night gloom seems to hang heavier here, with only the streetlights keeping the inky dark at bay.

4/x
>>
>>30091133
>“I was following you…” Your guard says, now taking notice of her surroundings as well. “And you lead us right into the shady bar district. Nice. I could use a drink after repeating myself to the idiot at the police station five hundred times,” she says with a fanged grin
>Now, she takes the lead, trotting ahead and looking back at you. “Come on! If we’re lucky, we’ll run into some friends.”
>Taking a look around at the rough crowd that favors this place, and noticing glares sent your way, you gulp and follow Umbra closely.
>Trailing right behind the guard, you watch her swivel her ears around, taking in countless sounds with a thoughtful expression on her face. Her gait suddenly slows to a sedate walk, nearly making you run at the abrupt change of pace. Finally, she smiles as her ears both turn, facing a small pub set between what looks like a condemned building fit for squatters and a thinly veiled brothel.
>Walking up to the solid iron door of the pub, which held an oh-so charming sign saying “The Ripoff” which is half covered in rust, Umbra knocks on it.
>After a moment, something shuffles around inside and a slot opens on the door, letting a light blue slitted eye peer out. The eye falls on Umbra first, then travels to you and widens.
>“Who’s the tall one?” a stallion asks behind the door with a deep, almost guttural voice.

5/x
>>
>>30091137
>“My charge,” Umbra replies simply, her stance relaxed and gold eyes closed. “Surely you know by now?”
>Just where the hell is this little bat leading you? You can't help but wonder with a bit of worry. She wouldn't purposely lead you into danger, but this whole place as a strange vibe.
>Usually, strange vibes are NOT good.
>“Heh, who doesn't?” The deep voiced stallion returns her question with one of his own. “You sure you wanna bring him in here? Poor two-leg will get eaten alive. Literally.”
“Hold the fuck up!” You cry, waving your arms in an X “Time out! What was that about being eaten alive?!” You exclaim, making both your guard and the hidden stallion look at you.
>Umbra sighs and rolls her eyes as she turns back to the eye watching from behind the door. “Did you have to say that?” She asks, unamused. “Now you’ve gone and freaked my human out. Do you really think anypony will mess with him with me at his side? Because I don't think they’ll even entertain the thought. Besides, I haven't been here since I started my latest assignment,” the Major finishes, wrapping a foreleg around your own leg.
>The guard’s words and light embrace soothe your nerves some, but if this place is what you think it is, then your blood pressure is going to shoot through the roof.
>And puncture wounds don't mix well with such blood pressure.
>The stallion’s eye narrows thoughtfully. “I can think of a few, but none of them hang around here much anymore. If you’re wanting in, then fine. You were warned, though.”

6/x
>>
>>30091142
>With a metallic clank, the slot shuts, and a second later the sound of a huge lock’s tumbler being turned echoes hollowly from inside. Then another. Then a third. Finally, the door creaks inward on groaning hinges, shaking some of the rust on the front off.
>Umbra grins up at you and tugs your jeans with her fanged mouth, beckoning you to follow. Not that you have much of a choice.
>A sigh escapes your lips as you follow the vampony into the pitch black of the building, the door shutting promptly after and sending everything into shadow. You have to rely on the faint glint Umbra’s luminescent eyes cast to keep up in the dark interior. As you walk, you glance back to see who was guarding the door, only to see a single blue eye and a pearly white fanged smirk floating in the dark.
>Goosebumps break out along your body, so you quickly turn away and return to following the faint gold glow ahead of you.
“So, Umbra?” You ask the blackness ahead of you.
>Mmhm?”
“What is this place?”
>“An old hangout,” she answers, her glowing orbs glancing over her shoulder. “It moves around occasionally, and I haven’t been here since we met. This is a new spot.”
“What sort of hangout?” you ask warily, still unable to see. “I’m not about to get jumped, am I? I got enough of that back in highschool, thanks.”

7/x
>>
>>30091144
>She snorts. “Oh Anon; not everything is out to get you.”
“I’ve heard that one before…” You mutter as you strain your ears for something other than oppressive silence. To your surprise, you actually start to hear… Talking, shuffling, and the clinking of glass?
>“Alright, the stairs are right here, so don’t tr-!”
>The warning comes a second too late, and you do the one thing she tried to warn you about and slip on the unexpected first step.
“SHIT!”
>By pure reflex, you wrap your arms around the no-doubt shocked Umbra as you fall, locking your embarrassing and painful fates together.
>“-IIIIP! Oof!”
>Both you and the bat pony tumble down the unforgiving wooden stairs that seem to go on forever in a heap of flailing limbs and pained noises. Despite the cuddly vampire being ten times more durable than you, you still try to shield her in a hug as you both go down.
>“Ow! I said watch your step!” Umbra cries. “Why did you drag me with you!?”
>“It was reflex! I didn’t even thin-!” You wince when you smack against the wall especially hard. “Think! It just happened!” You manage to get out before you both tumble one last time and finally come to a stop. When the world stops spinning, you find your face buried in something cool with something fleshy poking your mouth.
>It’s silent for a moment as you try to catch your breath and let your rattled brain make sense of what just happened. Fucking hell that sucked something fearce.
>Around you is quiet whisperings, no doubt about your pratfall. Then one voice shatters the quiet in the worst way possible.
>“Yeah, boy! Git’er done!”

8/x
>>
>>30091149
>An echoing roar of cheers, whistles and laughter follows, forcing you pull your face up and look around. What greets your still half-dazed eyes is bar full of vamponies and the occasional normal pony, all of them pointing and hooting and hollering.
>Right at you and Umbra.
>You turn to your guard with a squint and a silent question primed, absentmindedly noting that she landed on her back. Your question is rebuffed, though, since the vampony is staring down, her face nuclear red and contrasting sharply with the short, cobalt mane covering her eyes. What does she look so embarrassed about? The fall? The noise over it? That shouldn't faze...her…
“Oh…”
>Looking down, you see just where you were resting a moment ago. Right between Umbra’s legs, and smack dab on the pair of soft mounds usually hidden between them.
“Well shit.”
>You shoot to you feet and pull Umbra up in an instant, setting her on her hooves and swiftly dragging her to an empty table near the back, heedless of the stallions you pass patting you on the back and the comments they pepper you with.
>“Need a wheelbarrow for those balls, bud?”
>“Look at this guy! I bet he could prench a tiger and get away with it!”
>“Git’er done!” shouts the same bombastic stallion from the first time with a hoofpump.

9/x
>>
>>30091153
>Each one who speaks up just makes the red on your face travel up your ears and down your neck. They all shut up when a room-rattling growl filled with fury rumbles out of Umbra’s throat. The three vocal ones even go bone white when she lifts her head and spears them with a glowing eyed, fang-bearing scowl. You’re surprised she hasn’t broken you grip and made a run for the closest one.
>“Hey, come on,” you tell her lowly. The guardsmare squeaks like a bat when you loop an arm around her middle and carry her with you the rest of the way. “No murder. You said this is a bar, right? Let’s get trashed and forget it ever happened.”
>In the very back of the establishment and against a wall is a round, unoccupied table surrounded by chairs, one of which your drop your armful of pony into. You take your own seat right across from her, but keep your eyes averted from hers. Instead, you take the time to let your still flushed face drain and inspect the bar.

10/x
>>
>>30091162
>‘Cool’ would be the first word to describe it. Both cool as in being interesting, and in the theme. The low light, pale blue stone walls, and subtle chill of the underground location made for a soothing setting. The bar itself, manned by a an older looking vampony mare, is in the middle of the room as a hollow island. A shelf that wraps around itself stands in the center of the island, filled with glass bottles and flanked with barrels large enough for someone to drown in. In the far corner, a record stereo fills the air with the voice of a singer you can't place, but sounds like a pony Sinatra.
>Only a few minutes later the leers and chatter about the fall have stopped, as all the other patrons return to their previous conversations. It leaves the room back in the dull roar you’d expect in a bar.
>You take a deep breath and glance over to Umbra, who hesitantly lets her eyes meet yours.
>Time to face the music.
>“I’m sorry!” Both you and Umbra say at once, then blink in confusion. “You’re sorry? But that wasn’t your fault!” You both exclaim.
>Silence falls over the table. For several minutes, there’s nothing but the sounds of the other conversations around the room and the clinking of glasses.

11/x
>>
>>30091166
>One of the waitresses milling about, a lithe vampony mare with a jeweled choker and auburn mane, eventually stops by the table with a small notebook held in a leathery wing. “Anything I can get you two?” She asks politely.
“Something strong?” you ask to the mare across from you.
>“Something very strong.” She confirms simply.
You turn to the waitress. “Surprise us.”
>The waitress nods knowingly, jotting down the simple order. “Don’t you worry at all, you two. I know exactly what you need,” she says with a smile, closing the notebook and weaving through ponies for the bar.
With her gone, you turn back to Umbra. “So, are we just going to dance around what happened all night? It was just an accident, right?”
>The major takes a deep breath and lets it out, twiddling her front hooves in a distinctly not-Umbra display of nerves. “It was,” she concludes. “An accident I mean. I should have caught you, though,” she grumbles with a frown.
“Maybe I shouldn't have tripped,” you offer with a wave at yourself. “But oh well, no taking it back now.”
>“I guess not,” your guard agrees, her voice growing lighter with the smile slowly finding it’s way on her face. A sudden thought seems to catch her, making the little bat scrunch her muzzle as a bit of pink returns to her cheeks. “Anon?”
“Hmm?”

12/x
>>
>>30091168
>“When we fell and stopped, did you..?” Her cheeks are fully red now. “What I mean is, well… I sorta...Did you..?”
>You lean forward, anticipation growing in you as she tried to find the words she wants.
>“Well well, lookie here!” A new and cheerful voice interrupts. “If it ain’t miss major herself and her bestie-n-breakfast. Good on ya for earlier, string bean. I’m more of a flank kind of guy myself, though.”
>“Tisk tisk, brother. Having the tastes of a common plebeian is simply deplorable,” the exact same voice says. “At least pretend to have respectable preferences.”
>“Coming from the stallion who puts ketchup on his steak?”
>“We agreed to not talk about that…”
>Your head turns so fast towards the new arrivals that your neck pops. Standing just to the side of the table, each one sporting an identical grin, is a pair of tall vampony stallions who are practically mirrors of each other. Both sport the iconic grey coat of vamponies, a pair of dark green eyes each, same sized bat wings, and plain brown windblown manes. Neither is wearing any armor or clothes, so the only why you could tell them apart was the nick missing from the ear of the one on the right.
>“Shank? Sham?” Umbra questions with a furrowed brow. “What are you two doing here? I thought you were out in the field?” Her expression turns sour. “We were having a private conversation as well.”

13/x
>>
>>30091172
>“Well, we WERE out and about on our dear moon lady’s orders,” Shank, on the right says with a casual shrug of his wings. “But…”
>“Some things happened, and one thing lead to another annnnnnd the individual we were supposed to tail was caught in a housefire,” Sham finishes. “Poor bloke, went too soon, yada yada…” he says insincerely. “A shame… I guess. Got us put on admin leave for a bit. Why didn’t you save him, Shank?”
>“Oi. I told you to do it.”
>“Well, I didn’t, so it fell to you.”
>You turn away from them a bit, hoping they didn’t notice your discomfort at the casual admittance of letting someone perish in a fire.
>“And a private convo, major?” Shank asks with a lopsided grin and a shake of his head. “In The Ripoff? A deep hang? Come now, that’s tripe and you know it,” he says, pulling out a chair for himself as his brother did the same next to him. “Either way, we’ve never meet feedbag here, mind doing the honors, Major U?”
>Feedbag?
>Umbra narrows her eyes at them. “Anon, this is Shank,” she points to the one closer to you with the nicked ear, who grins, “and Sham,” the one closer to her grins as well. “Professional headaches for high command,” she says in a clipped tone.
>“Amen!” both say as one.

14/x
>>
>>30091175
>“Amen!” both say as one.
>“And you both seem to already know Anon…”
>“Really now, who doesn't?” Sham asks as Shank flags down a waitress. “It’s not every day space and time loses it’s shite and leaves behind an alien. The whole city’s heard, and word even got all the way down to the countryside.”
>He nudges your shoulder with a hoof. “You’re becoming a legend without any effort, friendo. Soon you’ll have cults and fanatic mares making long sojourns to have your foals, you know that?”
“Yeah, I doubt that,” you respond dryly. “I don't stick my dick in crazy. Personal rule of mine.”
>“No D for loonies, eh?” Shank asks with a raised eyebrow and upturned lips. “Little late for that one,” he snickers, nodding towards Umbra.
>“It’s not like that. We’re not-!” You and your guard say in sync, stopping halfway and meeting eyes when you realize it.
>Both of the vampony twins hold their forelegs in front of their muzzles, vainly trying to stifle their mirth. While they’re doing that, the same lithe waitress happens by with a bottle of clear liquor in a pink label, a pair of shot glasses, and two frothing tankards balanced across her open wings.
>“Sorry about the wait,” she apologizes to you and Umbra. “I had to run to the back to get this,” the waitress says, sliding the clear bottle between yourself and the guard. The tankards go to the delighted brothers before the mare departs.

15/x
>>
>>30091189
>“Anyway…” Shank starts again, his lopsided smirk bearing a single fang. “You sure you ain’t doing the monster mash with the fair major, string bean? Because THAT,” he points to the liquor bottle with a wingtip, “tells a whole ‘nother story it does.”
“What?”
>You frown and nab the bottle by it’s neck, pulling it closer to inspect it. Honestly, it seems like a normal bit of liquid courage. Or so you think until you see the label.
>‘The Marriage Fixer - 110 proof’
>‘Drink till you forget why you were fighting’
>‘Saving relationships and promoting liver cleansings since 790 A.N.’
“Is this for fucking real?” You ask with your face screwed up in incredulous awe. “The universe is laughing at me now. I know it.”
>“Pfffft! Ain’t the only thing having a laugh, mate!”
>If the pair of stallions were laughing before, they’re in table pounding stitches now as they lose all composure. Sham even coughs so hard after inhaling his drink that he looks like he might vomit, but goes right back to laughing afterward.
>You set the bottle down and cover your face with a hand, trying to will the headache coming on to go away.
>“Fuck it. I don’t even care anymore.”
>Brows furrowed, you wonder why your voice came out so… feminine. When Umbra leaps over the table to the chair on your other side with a flat look on her usually happy face, you realize that it’s her that was talking.

16/x
>>
>>30091192
“Are you picking up curses from me?” You ask, turning to her with a perturbed look. “Don’t. It makes me feel like I’m teaching swears to children for funzies.”
>The mare snorts, amusement dancing her gold irises. It dies a little when the other two ponies at the table go “Ohhhhhhhhhhh!” like they were trying to incite a schoolyard brawl.
>“You gunna let him call you a kiddo, major?” Sham asks behind a grinning swig of his tankard.
>“Whack’em, major!” Says Shank. “Show him what you did to the last guy to call you a tot. Poor bastard limped for weeks.”
>You just shake your head and grab the bottle of pony liquor. All this talking when there’s booze on the crown’s bit to be had.
>“How about I whack you, instead?” Umbra returns with a raised eyebrow. “I’d say good effort on trying to rile me up, but I try to tell the truth where I can,” she finishes, resting the elbow of her foreleg in the table.
>Shank “Hmm”s into into his hoof, as if thinking. “Whack ME major? I’m flattered, but I’m a married stallion, and my sweet would literally have me by the jewels should she find out. Now my brother…” Said brother glances as back when he’s nudged with a wing. “Now he’s free. Do what you will.”

17/x
>>
>>30091198
>Sham shoots his brother a look of abject betrayal. “Stuff it, wanker. I’m not trying to die here. Besides, the major strikes me as a gal who likes ‘em… Untraditional you know? Like tall and weird,” the stallions says, sending a knowing look your way.
>You don't even acknowledge him as you pour out a shot for you and your guard each. Curious, you lift yours and take a whiff, only to suppress a wince when your nose hairs promptly burn away.
>This is going to be like drinking rocket fuel, isn’t it?
>Sham narrows his green eyes to a glowing slit at being ignored, but approaching hoofsteps stop before he can voice his displeasure.
>“Hmhm! What interesting company this little hole-in-the-wall attracts.” a mare arily comments.
>Twisting around to face the voice behind you, you feel your eyes widen a bit. Standing there with a half-full wineglass held aloft in a soft aura of pink is none other than Bright Night, sans her armor.
>“Interesting indeed…” She repeats, trailing off as her eyes fall upon the only stallions at the table. “Might I join you? My company had to leave early and left me to my lonesome.” The vampony unicorn asks, giving her strangely viscous wine a dainty twirl in it’s glass.
>“The more the merrier, love,” Sham begins with deceptively gentle smile. “Dear brother O mine, you mind vacating your spot so the lovely miss can sit?” He says, turning to his unamused looking twin.

18/x
>>
>>30091206
>“No need, but my thanks all the same,” Bright replies with a cool look as she walks to the open spot on Umbra’s other side and seats herself. “A most unusual gathering, Major. Of course I expected Anon but…”
>The medic trails off again, sending you a searching, sidelong glance.
>You let your lips twitch upward and give her a discreet nod, not voicing your forgiveness for the event several days ago. As you do, you tip the shot you poured for yourself down.
>Annnnd you almost cough it back up, grimacing the entire way it went down. God almighty that tasted like pain and went down like lit gasoline. Hell, actual gasoline would have been much better than that.
>Bright lets herself smile gently for only a moment at you, her pink eyes filled with laughter, before she drops it and returns her attention to Umbra.
>“Well, Anon and myself were just wandering around after our visit to the PD,” the major starts, hoofing the little shot glass you slide to her. “Really, it’s just chance the we ended up here. I never got to learn where the place moved since babysitting became my primary assignment,” she says with a cheeky grin sent your way.
You snort. “Babysitting? You mean being babysat, right? I’ve pulled your ass out of the fire more times than I care to count,” you tell her, watching as she drains her shot glass with nary a wince.

19/x
>>
>>30091208
>“Woo… This IS some good stuff!” Umbra smiles with her muzzle twitching. Turning back to you, she rolls her large eyes. “Riiiiight. Sure you have. You know all about grabbing my ass, don’t you? Or at least fantasizing.” She shoots back flirtatiously, her embarrassment from earlier faded.
>The twins both openly snicker and Bright hides a giggle behind her raised glass.
“You’d like that, wouldn't you?” You ask, taking both her glass and yours to be refilled. “What would your parents say if they knew you got your jollies of from being molested by an alien?”
>“Beats me,” she replies with a shrug. “Lots of cursing and yelling though. I haven’t seen them in like, what? Forty years? I swear, they’re still mad at me over the griffon I brought home way back when.”
>Sham nudges Shank. “See? I told you she was into weirdos,” he says, hoofing off his empty tankard to a passing waitress.
>“Odd that she’s not vying for you then,” his brother comments dryly, earning him a narrow eyed look.
>“I take it they’re not fond of non-ponies, major?” Bright asks after delicate sip of her wine. “Or maybe not even of non-vamponies? You’re from an older clan if I recall.”
>Umbra waves a hoof dismissively. “Eh, it’s not that. Mom and dad were never really ones for tradition. It’s just that…” she trails off
>“Bugger was a crook, wasn’t he?” Shank cuts in, making your guard look at him in surprise.
>“How did you know?”

20/x
>>
>>30091213
>“Because,” Shank starts, facing Umbra with a ‘you-should-know-this’ condescending smirk. “You can’t be a griffin and NOT be a crook. Bloody rats with wings, they are. Take your eyes off them bird claws for a second and they’ll be in your pocket or around your throat the next.”
>“Just toss a firestorm spell in the bird captial and let the fire do the rest,” Sham says snidely. “We’d get less assignments and pay, sure, but you’d do the world a favor.”
>You almost choke your second shot down after hearing that. What a jump that was, calling griffons thieves then going right for genocide.
>Sham’s brother looks at him oddly. “You’re awful fond of all the fire recently, aren’t you?” the nick-eared pony says carefully, earning him a frown.
>“Rather distasteful don't you think?” Bright asks before Sham can snap at his brother, her pursed lips and downturned brows bordering on a scowl. “To wish such mayhem upon others simply because you do not like them. What would Her Majesty say?”
>Umbra tosses back her second shot, then levels the brothers with her own glower, eyes bright and baleful in the low light.
>The two look back the the mares, impassive.

21/x
>>
>>30091218
>A sudden tension grips the area, so much that the other tables around yours slowly go quiet and try to peer towards the silent drama without drawing attention themselves.
>You look between the two parties with a single bead of sweat rolling down your face despite the chill, leaving a ticklish trail. Even with the alcohol steadily peeling away at your common sense, you dare not wipe the sweat away for fear of the moment setting someone off. You knew the new vamponies were trouble just waiting to happen.
>And it’s about to happen right in front of you.
>The brothers turn their heads to each other just the slightest amount, enough for their smouldering green eyes to meet for just a split second, but in that split second, you know they formed a plan. Who are these two, you wonder, to be bold enough to challenge not only Bright Night, but Umbra as well?
>Both Umbra and Bright subtly coil in their seats. The legs they sit on, powerful enough to shatter stone, ready to turn them into blurs of motion and violence at a moment’s notice.
>You need to do something, and do it now. Otherwise this is going to get ugly with a capital U. Just as you open your mouth, another voice beats you too it.
>“Enough of that, you bucking children!”

22/x
>>
>>30091222
TRIPS

>All the heads in the room turn to the rough, aged voice.
>Standing behind Shank and Sham, with the concerned looking lithe waitress just behind her, is the old vampony mare who was behind the bar.
>She stands at the normal height for a pony, and even seems frail compared to the vamponies around her, but the old mare wears an expression so stern that a single pointed look from her vermillion eyes could halt the reaper himself in his tracks. Considering her wrinkled face, faded to white mane, and missing left wing, she might just actually do that.
>“If you think I’m just going to let you anklebiters start something in my bar, then you can forget it,” she says, her snarl revealing her teeth along with her broken right fang. “Either take it outside, or don’t do it at all!”
>Her glare falls on Shank and Sham, who both roll their eyes and look elsewhere.
>“Don’t you dare pull that with me!” The old mare roars, making both of the stallions wince. “You two make more trouble than you're worth in the service of the princess, and she keeps you, but I’m not that forgiving. You want to come here anymore? Partake of what I work my hooves to the bone to get for you? Then you’ll do what I say, and I say quit starting trouble!”
>“Of course ma’am. No need to worry, we were just leaving anyway…” Sham offers in a quiet voice.
>After a theatrical look at the clock, which read 2:04 AM, his brother speaks next. “Indeed, prior engagements and whatnot. We were just here to see some... friends is all.”

23/x
>>
>>30091229
>You can't help but frown at the way he says ‘friends.’
>Both stand briskly, with Shank leaving a single 20 bit coin on the table. As one, both march past the stern barmare and towards the stairs past all the subdued patrons at the other tables.
>You shake your head and raise your glass to your lips-!
>“Oi, Feedbag!” Sham calls over his shoulder. “Drop that one, friendo. The pretty lil thing serving the table slipped you something special when she passed last time.”
>Wait, what?!
>Looking down at the shotglass almost touching your lips, you see a thin film of white around the edges of the alcohol. It’s so faint, that you would have never noticed had it not been pointed out. Slowly, you set the glass down and withdraw your hand.
>Shank smirks, venom coating his next words. “Pick up a better befuddling charm next time, love! Or somepony might get jumpy seeing your half-arsed one and, well...” He lifts a wing, and held on it is a choker filled with cracked jewels, “take a swing a mite closer...”
>The waitress’ eyes widen so far that you swear they were going to pop out of her skull. Her hoof then shoots up to her, sure enough, bare neck as she goes pale under her fur. Her eyes dart around the room, but the only exit is blocked by the pair of stallions who caught her.
>And from the sadistic smiles they wore, they would not be letting her through.

24/x
>>
>>30091235
>It’s only your hand on the back of her armor that keeps a furious Umbra from shooting out of her chair as a mach 5 pain missile towards the already doomed waitress.
>With terrible, foreboding slowness, the aged barmare turns to the waitress, who begins to tremble in the now totally silent room.
>“M-missus Wine, please! I have an explanation for this!”
>The old mare, now named Wine, doesn't respond right away. Instead, she stares down the young waitress with an impassive expression somehow a thousand times worse than her previous glare.
>“Do you now?” Wine asks softly, but the words may as well have been thunder in the silent room. Even the record player has stopped. “No. I don't think you do. You cannot explain to me what you have done.”
>Wine slowly circles the lithe mare, who shakes even more and does her best to avoid the barmare’s eyes. “How long have I run this establishment, Autumn?” she asks.
>Autumn, the waitress gulps. “Since before The Nightmare.”
>Now your eyes shoot open. Before “The Nightmare?” what the fuck does that mean? She CANNOT mean that this place is…
>You send a cursory look to both the mares at your table. Bright Night takes notice, and after looking at the spectacle playing out, mouths ‘Exactly what you think it means’.
>The thought floors you. Christ almighty no wonder Wine looks so old. She’s literally ancient!

25/x
>>
>>30091105
>sorry for breaking your wall
but

Interesting synopsis. Are there are comfy cuddles?
>>
>>30091238
>“And what is the one rule I set here, Autumn?”
>Autumn is nearly in tears now. “I-it’s a reprieve from what goes o-on outside,” she chokes out.
>“Yes,” Wine agrees. “For whom?” she asks, voice damning.
>The younger vampony hesitates. “F-for us?”
>The other mare leans back, her mouth set into a thin line. “For all who enter, Autumn. Vampony or not, friend or stranger. It hasn't been about just us for years.” She turns away, her burning vermilion eyes closed. “Leave, and do not come back. Ever.”
>Autumn needs nothing else as she turns and sprints for the stairs, tears trailing down her face. Whether they’re from the shame of letting Wine down, or the shame of being caught, you don’t know. Frankly, you don’t care either.
>She rushes past Shank and Sham, who step out of the way and leisurely head up the stairs leading outside themselves.
>The drama over, the crowd slowly goes back to talking and laughing, through many eye your table.
>Wine the barmare opens her eyes and turns to you, Bright, and Umbra. “I apologize for that,” she says simply. “As you probably already know, my name is Fine Wine. That one didn’t seem like a bad apple when I brought her in.”

26/x
>>
>>30091241
>“Hmhm! There was no harm done,” Bright says, taking point in the conversation since Umbra was still fuming. “It was fortunate that the unsavory plan was foiled, even if it was at the last moment…” Her pink eyes turn to you, filled with concern. “Are you well, Anon? You’ve ingested nothing but alcohol tonight, yes?”
“I’m good,” you say, honestly a bit shaken. “I don't really feel anything odd, but thanks for the concern.”
>A bit shaken might be an understatement. What were you almost drugged with? A common roofie? Something more nefarious? Were Umbra and Bright next? What did Autumn intend to do afterward?
>You hand reaches up and rubs the always tender spot on your neck where you feed Umbra. Ever since the thing with Bright, you kept the spot always washed, and the red amulet Glimmer gave you ensured the wound sealed itself promptly.
>In your imagination, you see a nameless, faceless vampony swathed in shadow above you, your limbs pinned by them. Then a flash of pain as fangs sink into your neck, the owner greedily downing entire mouthfuls of blood as your vision bleeds black. It hits you there, that your entire life up to that point was just to be food.
>“Anon!”
>A familiar mare jumps in, knocking the shadowy figure off of you and away.
>You snap out of the vision.

27/29

>>30091240
Yeuh
>>
>>30091247
>Umbra’s dread contorted face comes into focus as she shakes you from her spot on your lap. “Anon? Are you there?”
“Umbra?” You ask unsurely, looking around to see yourself still in the bar.
>“You were staring off for almost five minutes there,” your vampony says with relieved sigh. “I thought something was wrong…”
>The look on her face is heartbreaking, enough to spur you forward into wrapping the mare in a tight, spontaneous hug. The booze probably helped too.
>She goes stiff in surprise, and a tiny gasp leaves the fanged mouth right next to your ear.
“Don’t worry about it, Umbra,” you tell her, feeling her ear jaw work with no words coming out against your cheek. “I’m sorry for worrying you. That’s the last thing I wanted to do. Promise.”
>She sniffs. “You’re the one who was almost drugged, and you’re worried about ME?” She pulls just far enough away that you can see her small smile and misty eyes. “I really cannot believe you sometimes.
>Feeling especially bold, you lean forward and touch your forehead to hers, drawing another surprised look from the gold eyes an inch away from yours.
“I’ll be blunt, you pain in my neck,” you say with a smile. “Of the few things I have in this crazy pony world, you're the one I like the most. So of course I don't like worrying you.”

28/29
>>
>>30091252
>Her jaw slowly drops as her eyes blink unsurely. Her shock is only there for a moment, however. Her expression melts into a delicate smile with half lidded eyes, making your stomach tingle and flutter.
>For a moment, you just ignore everything else and hold the pony in your arms, enjoying her chilled body against your flushed one.
>“Well, looks like the Fixer did it’s job at least.”
>Both you and Umbra snap your heads around to look at a vaguely amused Fine Wine, who is holding a clean shot glass in her hoof. “I was bringing you a clean glass, but…”
“Hold on now! Lets not get any ideas, about either this or the glass,” you say with a red face, but not letting go of the mare in your lap. “Bring that here so I can drink myself stupid.”
>Umbra rolls her eyes. “What am I going to do with you…”
“Drink with me, I hope.”
>The rest of the evening is spent in a light hearted haze with fine liquor and even finer friends.

29/29
>>
>>30091255
https://pastebin.com/u/Notonefuck
https://pastebin.com/xfXw9RsT

ARISE THREAD

The girls in the gold armor need more love. The bats in the blue armor do too.

r8 n h8
>>
>>30091291
>r8 n h8
Gonna be a while. half way though chap 1 Probably only going to be able to finish the first 4-5 tonight
>>
>>30091255
Holy shit. I was just reading this the other day on fimfiction and lamenting that it wasn't finished. And then you emerge from literally nowhere to drop an update?

Banter and dialogue continues to be your strongest spot. Umbra is as snarktastic as always, and the two bothers... it's like you took Flim and Flam, gave them wings, and double-dosed their teasing levels. I do also like the small degree of culture and headcanon you've built up around your idea of the Night Guard - the idea that one could literally be running a bar since Before Nightmare, and so on.

I'm also left with the sense that all of this - the roofie from a previously-good barmaid, the breakin, the stalker-replacement for Umbra - are meant to be leading into a greater plot, and I am looking forward to seeing where that goes.

I do hope you next update comes sooner than two years more!
>>
>>30091497
fimfiction is shit.
>>
>>30086151
Now reach around and snap its neck before disposing of it in a dumpster.

Its not even murder. It's pest control.
>>
>>30091149
>>“Yeah, boy! Git’er done!”
kek
whats the cable guy doing there
>>
>>30091255
>>30091291
He really is just a glorified walking buffet isn't he? Sounds like to me if he didn't have what is apparently a very dangerous bat by his side at all times he'd already be dead.
>>
>>30092549
Anon beat Bright night in an earlier chapter when the smell of an open bite wound made her lose control of herself, so he's not totally helpless.
>>
>>30092632
So he only beat her because she essentially became a rabid, unthinking animal? That doesn't bode well.
>>
>>30092652
>>30092549
Humans are friends, not food.
>>
>>30091291
>finished all the chapters.
Enjoyed almost all of it.

It was always nice seeing them be sweet towards each other. Good atmosphere. It's a shame we never had any action (fighting or sexual) for umbra to show off in.
>>
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>>30091255
>>30091291
this is amazing NOF, keep it up
>>
starting out today
page eight needs to go away
vamp ponies in thread?
>>
>>30094308
Edgy batshit, yes.
>>
>>30091291
Boi this shit is gold
>>
>>30091291
>>30091291
Damn good story so far. Can't wait for more.

I bet bathater is jacking himself off with rage tears as we speak.
>>
>>30093933
>>30094493
>>30094544
Is it good? Haven't decided if I'm going to read it yet or not. Blood sucking vampires are not my thing but I like what NOF has written in another thread so far.
>>
>>30094589
it's pretty comfy man, has some funny moments too with all the smugness
>>
>>30094589
It's good. The blood sucking is more of a lovey 'I-do-this-because-I-like-you' thing rather than a fetish, and fleshed out OCs plus lore is a refreshing change.
>>
>bat hater returns
>carpet bombing of bat green commences
I love it.
>>
>>30094632
>>30094657
I like comfy the most. Alright, I'll bite.
(Sorry, I couldn't help giving a bad pun.)
>>
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>>30095293
I love my bats.
>>
>>30095509
Well written bats are fine. The cancer that spills over from bat general is shit.
>>
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>>30095533
Cancer? What cancer? I don't see what you're talking about.
>>
>>30095293
>>30095533
>>30095549
Kinda funny in a way, isn't it? It's almost like saying
>Autism hater returns
>carpet bombing of a race almost entirely made up by the fandom with fanon fangs commences
>>
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>>30095559
ok
>>
boop the bat
>>
>>30091497
Can you pass the fimfiction link. I prefer reading there than on pastebin.
>>
>>30096264
https://www.fimfiction.net/story/109196/going-bump-in-the-night
>>
I miss the comfiness of Over the Moon.
>>
>>30096573
What was it about?
>>
>>30097120
It's Moondancer's shop in Blu's story
>>
Wasn't there a con on this weekend, did Blu and CW attend?
>>
>>30097235
Probably not. They are off writing for other thread, or goofing off working, or studying or something. Hoping desperately we have lost interest.
>>
>>30097347
I-I still love you guys
>>
>>30097220
nah b, das cw anon
>>30097235
also no, because im poor
>>
>>30097513
We love you too, and your guardmare as well.
>>
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9
>>
>>30096573
Oh, Duh. I still had vamp ponies on the brain. I thought it was the title of another green. But; yeah, Blu >>30097534 is correct that's Moonie's shop in Careful's Charge. I miss it too. Hopefully Anon is able to help Moonie whip it back into shape soon. I'm sure he's stressing over not being able to see Care.

>>30097347
They're around.Can't expect them to be writing for us ALL the time on top of taking care of their IRL stuff. That's a quick way to burn out. Speaking for myself; I know my mind tends to go sideways if I break up the routine every so often.

>>30097513
We love our writefriends and drawfriends too.
>>
>>30098052
I NEED TO KNOW HOW CAREFUL IS DOING
>>
>>30098140
He left :'(
>>
>>30053594
>He kneels and hugs you towards his side.
>"But nevermind that, you look a bit conflicted. Hard time picking something out?"
>You quickly nod and bite your lip.
>"...Anon? Could you come here for a second?"
>"Hmmm? Oh ah, sure."
>He pats your side, then gets back up.
>"I'll help getcha that perfect dress after this!"
>You watch as he walks away towards the voice of Sweet.
>It gets you a little jealous, but you're much more thankful for the time alone.
>Who cares if it's "a mare's natural process"- this is embarrassing as hay.
>You glance around your surroundings and let out a sigh.
>Maybe just a little bit of your hoof...
>-No, stop it!
>-Sweet Luna, you HATE this!
>You had like, ONE lewd thought!
>ONE!
>You bite your hoof and try to focus on what's in front of you.
>Which, you know, is still the dresses.
>It just brings up the whole, "everything trying to stop you from this" thought again.
>-The small bell on the door rings.
>Oh Luna you hate everything.
>You instinctively look over, and wow, who else could it be but Captain Gold and Minuette?
>The last time you saw them was when Anon was in the hospital- but of COURSE, they just so HAPPEN to be here when you're like THIS?!
>Anon peeks his head out from the curtain and spots them.
>"Oh, hey!"
>He hops out and quickly makes his way over them, while you take this chance to duck under the clothes.
>And as much as you hate to do this, you gotta get out of here.
>There's no way you're showing yourself in this condition.
>You fold your ears back and slowly look around the stands.
>If you're that quick, there's a chance you can make it to the dressing rooms undetected.
>You check around again, then look at the rooms.
>Oh mare, come on, it's just right there.
>You shake your head and run in place, tapping lightly on your hooves.
>The second you hear Anon moving your way, you jump and dart towards safety.
>>
>>30098430
Oh sweetheart, it may be one lewd thought, but you KNOW how worth it, it is going to be when you get back to your room. Hell, Anon may even carry you back as soon as he finds out that you two are horny.
>>
>>30098430
Those hormones sure hit those poor little ponies like a damn hammer.
>>
>>30098430
>Once you slip past the curtain, a flash of white, brown and green fills your vision.
>"OOF!"
>In the mishmash of hooves, you can't stop yourself from landing right on top of her.
>Like, fluff to fluff, eyes locked and-
"-Sorry, sorry sorry!"
>You hop back up to your hooves and stay silent, perking an ear towards the curtain.
>"...Huh. Well, she WAS here."
>Okay, at least you made it out!
>Sure, you happened to end up in the same dressing room as Brave here, but still.
>In fact, if she clearly wasn't as flustered as you are, she probably would have gotten you right in the face.
>Her ears flick about, and the red on her face is obviously not going away any time soon.
>"Why are you in here? What's going on?"
"Sorry, company came by. I didn't want to talk to anypony... well, like THIS."
>She slowly nods in understanding, ears flicking around again.
>"I... I've never had it this bad before... This is like..."
"-Yeah, I know."
>You sigh and back up, sitting closer to the edge of the room.
>It's easy to pick up how bad Brave's got it, which makes her running into here like she did completely understandable.
>Especially since, well, you're here too.
>You relax a bit more, at least knowing you're not suffering alone.
>And maybe relax a bit too much, when you can feel the cold tile ground touch your backside.
>Even through your tail, it's freezing enough to make you yelp.
>"That's why I'm sitting up here."
>You hop up onto the small plastic bench and feel a smaller chill from it.
>While you simply sit there, too overcome with other things to really speak, you're just reminded of your days back in training.
>Hay, none of the other mares seemed to care about their seasons, or anypony else knowing that they were in it.
>Maybe because they were all older- you don't know.
>But hiding was the only way to avoid all the pranks they'd pull.
>...And to keep your tail from being cut again.

tomorrow's the PTCE and i didnt study
time to fail and kms
>>
>>30098206
What the actual fuck, really? Why? His shit was good?
>>
>>30098630
>blu does medical stuff
No wonder he's able to deliver deadly doses of lewd
>>
>>30098430
Back before Anon's abduction I thought Minuette would make a good herdmate for our intrepid group. I still do but I'm liking the implied pairing here with Captain Gold. I'm certain Anon and the girls would be happy for them.

>>30098630
Aww, poor B&V. They've never had to deal with THIS before. At least not this bad. No doubt Anon's going to be clueless and drag them out. Hopefully, Gold can stop him before he embarasses them more than they already are.

Thanks for the update Blu. However, like we've told Whiskey; get your studies done. We'll be here. We're a patient bunch.
>>
>>30098748
Clueless Anon and Clueless Gold talking relationship problems over a slice of pie when?
>>30098630
I know it sounds superficial but good luck. I'm a superstitious bastard and if you've got any lucky rituals or items I guarantee they help I know it's just a placebo that helps you stay at ease and think more clearly but I like to think my lucky pen is magic
>>
>>30098775
>Clueless Anon and Clueless Gold talking relationship problems over a slice of pie when?
Oh, crap. You're right. I forgot about that. kek. Well, maybe Minuette will help.
>>
"I'm still alive" update... I'll get this moving again soon.

>>30060875
>...
>You turn the last page of your book and take another look outside.
>Sun's still out, but it's lower in the sky.
>It's not too late to go out, if you want.

>...

>But you don't want to.
>This is a day to relax, to stay in.
>To...

>...but you made friends yesterday.
>That doesn't happen a lot.
>And you've learned from experience not to rely solely on their initiative to get to know each other better.
>Careful is either under observation or not taking visitors, and Anon is indisposed, so that leaves Moondancer to visit.
>So be it.

"Cheep. Cheep cheep."
>The finch on your shoulder ignores you, fluffing himself up and scooching closer to your neck.
"Cheep..."
>You give him a pat on the head and nudge him with the same hoof.
>"CHEEP."
>He flies off, out of the room, to his cage.
>You hear a flutter of wings following him.
>>
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>>30098630
oh shit
anons gotta quench dat fire mang
>>
>>30099308
I bet you her hooves will taste like cinnamon roll frosting
>>
>>30098665
His green didn't have anon in it and nobody read it anyway, good riddance
Besides we've got NOF here to take his place and his green is 10x better in every way

>no meaningless gore
>no edginess for the sake of edginess
>MC is Anon and not some literally who pony that doesn't matter
>Bats
>>
>>30099024
>>30098630
glad you guys took a little timeout to give us a visit.

also
>you gave her birds because we called her birdpone

Didn't you.
>>
>>30099961
His green did have Anon technically
He was just dead.
It's a sequel to "flight of the Nightingale" which had Anon.
>>
>>30091291
Why here and not the bat thread? I'm not talking shit, just curious.
>>
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>>30100447
>bat thread
>>
>>30100474
what kind of fucking answer is that
>>
>>30100447
We're a thread about Royal Guard Mares which their story has. I think NOF offered to post it here since we're down a writefriend at the moment. I for one appreciate it as I know they've been writing greens for other threads.

Hey NOF, I'm certain you've been here awhile but if I haven't said so yet. Welcome to the thread.
>>
>>30099024
>more Moonie
Excite
>>
>>30099988
Well, she is a bird pone, and I thought being like she is she would like having pets she can relate to and understand more easily than other ponies. I also lost a pet cockatiel recently and had him on my mind when I was writing.
>>
>>30101006
Aww, sorry to hear that CW, cockatiels are wonderful birds. My great-grandparents had one and he was the goofiest little thing.
>>
>>30101006
Our pets tend to leave lasting impressions on our hearts and minds. Sorry to hear about your pet bird.

I totally see Safe having birds as pets. I think most pegasi would feel a kinship with them.
>>
Safety's chirping birds
Thoughts turn to her newfound friends
Time to visit one

pg 8
>>
>>30100485
A distainful one
>>
I hope Blu does well on his test.
>>
>>30102920
this
>>
>>30102920
>I can only post through my proxy. Even though i normally can't.

>>30102920
Me too.
Hopefully he was exaggerating a bit
>>
Was visiting family over the weekend but I'm back now. Probably won't have anything tonight, but I've got a light work schedule for a while.
>>
>>30104239
Hope you had a good time, and welcome back.
>>
It's been almost 24 hours, the test killed Blu.
>>
>>30104843
He'll be fiiiiiine after the booze wears off.
>>
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>>30099961
>>
>>30098630
>...
>You hate this.
>This is all terrible.
>You shift your hooves on the seat, thinking, trying to find a way to get out of this.
>Or really, just a way to get through this without anypony knowing.
>You're surprised Anon didn't notice anything when he came by, but you chalk it up to him not being a pony.
>Moving ever so slightly, you still get a jolt sent through you.
>A very strong one, at that.
>You feel your ears flick and glance over at Vannie.
>Her cheeks are as red as yours, from what you can see in the mirror beside you.
>You back up, then move your tail slightly.
>Bring your hindleg up juuust a tad...
>...Oh Celestia.
>A simple cold shower is NOT going to fix this.
>A small whine escapes you.
>-You freeze, and Vannie snaps over to you.
>You didn't do that on purpose!
>She just nods.
>"Yeah, I say we start brainstorming ideas or something, before this all gets worse."
>You nod back, though a little unsure of yourself.
>Just thinking is hard enough as it is, you don't think you have a good idea anywhere in you.
>...But you want it i-
>-STOP!
>You shake your head clear and focus.
>...Not a single non-lewd solution comes to mind.
>One of those ideas would definitely get you kicked out, if Sweet really does have a crush on Anon.
>Another is, uh...
>You quietly glance at Vannie again.
>Uh, well...
>"Wait... I think I miiight have an idea."
>Oh thank Celestia.
>She puts a hoof on her chin and stares at the ground, as if putting the rest of the pieces together.
>"Maybe we could try to cover everything. You know, layer stuff on, so it'll be harder for anypony to tell what's going on."
>Even in your flustered state, you can see the promise in that idea.
>The blush might be difficult to get rid of, but you'd rather be blushing around the city than announcing to the world that you're in season.
>"Oh hay, but Gold and Minuette definitely complicate things..."
>Your ears fall.

surprisingly, i passed
my autism lives to write another day
>>
>>30105158
We salute you, noble Blu, in your quest to better this world and tell us the tales of lewd ponies in another. Thanks for the update and congrats.
>>
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>>30105158
Exelent.

Now. For the little pones to scooby doo themselves out of a sticky situation.

They should let mini know. She would understand.
>>
flustered ponies sit
waiting the coast to clear
where is their armour

pg 8
>>
>>30105158
Jeez, just have him carry you both home and rail the heat out.
>>
>>30105991
dammit. it should be

>flustered ponies sit
>waiting FOR the coast to clear
>where is their armour
>>
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>>30106002
>bump, but with less effort
>>
>>30106827
simple bumps are fine
for lack of talent I pine
it is tough to rhyme
>>
Bump from 9
>>
>>30102920
Send god vibes
>>
>”Sandstone! Get out of bed, or what I do next will fill you with dread!”
>You grumble, tossing and turning in your bed to shield your eyes from the sunlight that filters through your blinds
>What day is it?
>How long have you been sleeping?
>You sit up in your bed and gently rub your eyes
>Weren’t you supposed to do something important today?
>The door to your room slams open
“Muddy, who let you into my house? Do you not know I’ve already been roused?”
>He grins and gestures back out the door
>”Aha, roused? Don’t make me laugh, surely you aren’t trying to dodge the draft?”
>You would never do something like that
>Zebrica needed able-bodied soldiers
>And not to brag but…
>You were about as able-bodied as it got
”Do not think me so low, Muddy. After all, I would not pass up the chance to join with my best buddy.”
>You finally get out of bed, and as usual, Muddy has to glance upwards to look you in the eye
>He gives you a once over and nods
>”Talk about overqualified. Go ahead and get ready, I shall meet you outside.”
>Your friend leaves your room, allowing you to finally get ready
>Your room is rather Spartan in nature, save for the fixtures that hung from the walls
>The incense has burned out, but the room still holds the lingering smell of cedarwood
>According to the city elders, it’s meant to symbolize power
>Your father also said that it increases virility, but you take that with a grain of salt
>Not that you’d ever be able to test it
>You replace the piercings in your ears and the rings on your tail
>Grab a mango from the basket on the kitchen counter
>And leave the house
>>
>>30108145
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=37Xo2xy12Dc
>You shield your eyes from the harsh sunlight
>As your eyes adjust, you look around
>The familiar sight of the bustling city greets you
>Mares and their children walking together
>Elderly ponies shopping in the market street
>Buildings built into other buildings
>Towering structures serving as watchtowers, from which the city guards are usually based
>And in the very center of it all, a massive spire that towers over all else, magical energy seen within shooting up towards the heavens and stopping just short of the clouds
>The magical shield extends from it in a dome around the city, ending at the outer walls
>It keeps the city safe from danger, according to the elders
>Thanks to the shield, the sunlight filtering in is tinted a light green
>Its shimmering, magical energy ripples and pulses, reflecting onto the ground and off the sides of buildings
>It makes you feel as if you’re underwater, looking up at the surface
>It never grew old, seeing the city like this
>It’s a shame you would be leaving it today
>You trot down the few flights of stairs, all the way down to the ground, where Muddy Waters is waiting
>”What took you so long Sandstone? Putting on some cologne? You know we should do our best to not postpone.”
>He starts trotting off, leaving you to catch up
>Muddy was shorter than you, and his stripes were much… Rougher than yours
>While yours were more tribal in nature, his were like scars haphazardly painted onto his body
>As opposed to your mohawk, his mane was done up in dreads
>Despite the differences, you two were like brothers
>Inseparable
>Unfortunately, you doubted that you’d be able to stick together throughout the entirety of your training AND deployment
>So in a way, this was like a last goodbye to each other
>>
>>30108151
>Both of you pass through the outer gates and the barrier with ease
>Going out was easy
>But the barrier would be hard-pressed to open from the outside
>That didn’t matter however
>You two weren’t going to be returning any time soon
>It was always an odd shift, seeing the light unfiltered by green
>It wasn’t nearly as pretty as it was inside the city
>You and Muddy trudge across the compacted sand created by countless hooves travelling this path over the years
>To an outsider, even these paths would be tough going, let alone the dunes and rolling sands of the desert proper
>But to a Zebra like you it was just another walk
>The two of you chat over unimportant things, though the topic of meeting each other again when the war was over always came up
“You know Muddy, there is a chance we may not survive. Very few of our soldiers ever return alive.”
>Muddy however never seems to give up his ever-cheerful attitude
>”What kind of talk is that? If there is anything that we are good at, it is combat.”
>He stops in the middle of the desert path and turns to you
>”You must promise me my friend, promise me that we will see each other in the end.”
>He holds out his hoof, slightly bent
>You knew what it was
>The traditional linking of hooves for a promise
>You simply didn’t know if it was one you could uphold
“I promise you my friend, I will make it back alive as long as it is something to which you will also strive.”
>You link the bend of your hooves together at the inner elbow, pulling each other closer together
>He simply nods, giving you his signature grin
>Perhaps everything WOULD turn out okay after all
>>
>>30108161
>But sometimes things just don’t work out the way you hope
>While you were exceptional, and excelled during your training
>Muddy was simply average
>You were assigned a golem, while he remained the ground infantry
>Though, now you were wondering if it would have been better if you’d simply been average
>A lot of good all the ceremony and exceptional records were when you’re bleeding out after taking a bayonet to the neck
>Your golem stands over you, watching you intently
>It appears to be calculating something
>You hear it tell you that you have no probability of surviving this
>Not that you thought you did anyway
>It says a goodbye to you, and ensures you that your next of kin will be informed
>”Even in death, you still shall serve.”
>You barely have time to ponder what that could mean before it places one of its fingers upon your chest
>A sharp pain explodes out from it in an instant
>But as soon as it had happened, it was gone
>And so was everything else
>You look around
>And see nothing but darkness
>You start to trot along
>But your hooves make no sound
>The darkness underneath your hooves shimmers with every step, and extends in every direction
>So you simply choose a direction and trot aimlessly
>The further you go, windows began to open
>More accurately they looked like portals
>Looking through them you saw events of your life playing out
>Some vivid, some mundane
>Others you didn’t even remember
>But some looked unfamiliar, like they’d never happened at all
>There’s a pony you don’t recognize
>An actual pony too, not a Zebra
>Who was she, you wondered?
>And why did she have a golem?
>Your thoughts are interrupted and the world is forcibly sucked away
>>
>>30108172
>You open your eyes
>At least, you think you do
>Your body feels different
>Very different
>There’s no warmth
>You feel trapped
>What’s going on?
>What’s happening?
>Are you dead?
>Was that a dream?
>You try to get up, but find yourself oddly sluggish
>You feel larger
>Heavier
>You take a look at your hoof, only to realize that it wasn’t a hoof
>You’ve got a hand
>A hand like a minotaur’s
>You try to shut your eyes, but you can’t
>Where are your eyes
>What’s going on
>WHAT ARE YOU
>SOMETHING IS WRONG
>”Sedate him.”
>A wave of soothing energy passes through you
>A spell was just cast on you
>You want to be angry, confused, afraid
>But the emotions felt muffled
>Distant
>Somepony steps into view
>It was a Zebra you knew well
>One of the elders from your city
>You try to speak, but no words come out
>You cannot feel your lips move
>In fact you can’t feel your face at all
>”Confused in the brain? Very well, I will explain.”
>A platform above you rotates around, revealing a large mirror
>In it, you don’t see your own reflection
>You see that of a golem
>”There is no lie, one thing remains true. The reflection you see is that of you.”
>Another wave of magical energy passes over you
>”Speak.”
“I… What… Has… Happened.”
>”Perished in battle as you were intended. With your brain we made a golem most splendid.”
>You touch your face
>Or what counts as your face now
>It’s just an orb
>You can’t feel your own touch now
>Except when you touch the orb
>”Where once was Sandstone, is now Bandit. Of who you once were, to your partner you will omit.”
>That’s what he thinks
>You would tell your rider what was going on here
>It wasn’t just you
>Countless zebras were being turned into these things
>At least, you THOUGHT you would tell the pony assigned to be your rider
>Upon being led out to meet your partner, sadness washes over you
>It was Muddy Waters
>>
>>30108181
>Back in the present…
>Current objective: Rendezvous with Rewind
>Secondary objective: Ensure safety of Rewind
>You’ve reached a large boulder
>One large enough to support your weight
>You can roll it with ease
>And you do so
>You roll it straight into the Burning Gulch
>It wedges itself on the rocks within, grinding to a halt
>Realistically, you know that it would give way the moment you stepped upon it
>However, the longer you go without seeing Rewind, the higher the odds that something bad may have happened to her
>You cannot allow something like that to happen
>Even worse, if something already HAS happened, you needed to be there to rescue her
>Moreso than just your partner, she was your friend
>And you would save your friend
>You take a running start and cross the boulder
>As you thought, it immediately starts to sink, carving out a path for itself through the rock and into the lava
>You leap from it, landing on the other side and tumbling through the dirt
>You can hear the boulder sink into the bubbling lava and melt
>That could have been you
>But it wasn’t
>Now you begin the long trek to where you last saw Rewind
>But there was no time to simply walk
>You begin sprinting towards your destination
>That being a beacon you placed in your memory back when you first threw Rewind across the gorge
>After that… You would need to find her the hard way, should she be out of range of tracking
>>
>>30108189
>Your sprinting steps crush anything unlucky enough to be in your path underfoot
>Luckily enough it was mostly grass and rocks
>You were a stallion on a mission
>Or… Rather a golem
>Odd
>You’d never referred to yourself as such since becoming a war construct
>Logging that oddity for later, you continue your full sprint towards the beacon
>You don’t have lungs or muscles, so it’s physically impossible for you to tire from this
>Hours pass as you run along the war-torn countryside
>Fires that have broken out from the proximity to the Burning Gulch
>Trees cut down for materials
>Even the gulch itself seems to be being used to mine for minerals
>Soon enough you begin to close in on the beacon’s position
>There was no doubt in your mind that Rewind would no longer be here
>After all, her target was deep inside one of Prance’s cities
>But it would be easier to follow her path from there
>You come across the small pulsing beacon and it dissipates
>Looking around, you spot the hill she disappeared over a few days ago
>She would have proceeded in this direction of course
>The only problem was what lie beyond
>It was of little consequence however
>Your massive chassis was almost impervious to small arms
>As you crest the hill, the battered landscape beyond comes into view
>>
>>30108204
>It was as if somepony had salted the earth
>Dried mud and ash sprawl across the former battleground
>Broken fortifications and barbed wire extend in either direction
>And the expanding gulch consumes the land nearby
>You watch as the remnants of sandbag emplacement fall into it, the lava hissing and bubbling
>Thump
>Thump
>Thump
>Thump
>Four steps were all it took for you to reach the bottom of the hill
>The entire place looks stripped clean for the most part
>The charred bodies tell you all you need to know
>That the Prench had swept through here
>After all, it WAS their land now
>This calculated brutality was not something you wanted to become the norm
>But it was already happening
>All the more reason to find Rewind
>Stop the war, none of this happens
>There was no way you would let her die
>She may very well be the only pony in existence able to go back in time to stop all of this
>And if that happens…
>You might be able to be a pony again
>You would be able to see your best friend again
>Everything would be normal
>That makes you stop for a moment
>Would you remember any of this?
>Would it cease to exist?
>It was a very real possibility
>What if…
>What if you never saw Rewind again afterwards?
>What if she never remembers you?
>…What if you never remember her?
>You look at the ground
>You don’t enjoy this thought
>But it was for the greater good, right?
>The needs of the many outweigh the needs of the few
>Or rather, just the needs of you
>If she succeeds, then you wouldn’t even remember her to feel sadness over never seeing her again
>Technically, she would never even exist to you
>You would never even know if you met her in passing
>But was that really a good thing?
>>
>>30108210
>You trudge onwards
>The bottom line was that you didn’t know how the time travel worked in the long run
>But there was no use lamenting it if it never happened
>You had to find Rewind so that you two could find the rest of the relics
>When all was said and done…
>Then you could say goodbye if you needed to
“I’m coming, Rewind. Please stay safe.”
>As the words reverberate out of the orb you feel a tremor within the ground
>It vibrates your chassis
>You didn’t know where it was coming from, but it was getting more intense
>And it was also getting closer
>You can feel it rumbling right beneath you now
>Dodge
>Dodge now
>You dive to the side, rolling and coming to a stop upon your feet once more as something bursts from the ground below where you previously stood
>It’s composition is like nothing you’d ever seen before
>It scuttles upon six insect-like legs
>But it was made of metal
>And it also carried some sort of turret on top
>The hull glows a slight red, most likely from having been underground near the lava
>You adopt a battle-ready pose
>Clearly this thing would not let you go without a fight
>You were having trouble figuring out if it was organic or not
>If it had a crew, you could reach in and crush them easily
>But-
>A shot rings out as the barrel recoils
>You catch the explosive charge in a vortex of magical energy and toss it back at the machine
>It deftly scuttles to the side, dodging it with ease
>This was going to be a problem
>>
So maybe 9 posts isn't the most impressive return of Sectopod, but I'd rather not blow my load already with the other 30 or so posts I've got saved up
I'll space it out like I usually do

Oh yeah I'm back and the pastebin is updated
Don't worry about me leaving suddenly before. some real heavy shit happened IRL
>>
>>30108247
Welcome back.
>>
>>30108247
And the prodigal writefag doth return. Welcome back, and I hope the heavy stuff was resolved.
>>
>>30108247
>real heavy shit happened IRL
Did you find out that your best friend thinks of you as more than a friend, and you had to take some time to process these news and think about how you feel for him?
>>
>>30108522
>>30108479
Nah, I wish. My grandmum that I was real close with died and I got fired from my job in the same week because I had to take a plane trip to go to her funeral. Couple that with some other stuff that was building up over the months, I just needed a break

But I'm doing alright now
>>
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>>30108522
Plus that already happened to me about a year ago
>>
>>30108662
Jesus, sorry to hear that. You're in my thoughts friend. You going to be alright, job and wellbeing-wise?
>>
>>30108688
I'll be alright. No need to worry about me. I'm lucky enough to have been born with thick skin so not much gets to me, and I've got enough saved up that I should be good until I find another job

On the bright side, I've got more time to write and play vidya and garden like the faggot I am
>>
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>>30108702
>garden like the faggot I am
>>
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>>30108702
There is absolutely nothing gay about gardening fucboi.

>pic related.
My cute pepper plant
>>
>>30108181
>Upon being led out to meet your partner, sadness washes over you
>It was Muddy Waters
Ouch. What a poke in the feels.

>>30108247
My condolences famalam. You and yours are in my thoughts. Welcome back. I am glad to see you. I did like the update. Some good pokes in the feels that I got goosebumps.
>>
Having a beer and some pizza before working on Solemn's story. Glad to see the other stories get some love and the return of Secto/Yoohoo
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http://prntscr.com/f93k7y
have a terrible lewd sketch
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>>30109840
Bats are haram and should be stoned
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>>30110292
yes they should
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>>30109840
Muh line art dik
>>
>>30105158
>Oh great, so THAT's who came in earlier.
>You thought one of those guards had recognized you out of your armor.
>Always looking for somepony to drop their paperwork on, those two.
>Your ears stand at attention.
>Anon's making his way over.
>You hop off and start putting the white dress on.
>"What are-"
>One of her ears perks towards the sound.
>She quickly moves into the blue dress as he gets closer.
>His silhouette moves past the curtain and no doubt towards the others.
>"Hey Vannie, ya left your armor out on the floor over here. Also, Dav- Gold and Minuette are here."
>"Over here!"
>She hops off and moves towards the entrance.
>He steps over, then peeks his head in.
>Once he spots you, his eyes widen just a tad.
>"Woah, you guys making out in here or what? I'd like to join."
>"W-what?! No!"
>"Then why are you blushing? Also that looks nice on you-"
>"-Look, could you just uh, could you grab a bunch of clothes for us? Undergarments and big dresses and stuff?"
>He pauses for a moment, looking over you both again.
>"Why can't you just come out and get it? You avoiding these two, or what?"
>"No, we just, uh..."
"-We want to surprise them!"
>You blurted that out a bit too loudly.
>He scans your faces.
>"You know, I'm dumb, but I ain't stupid. I'll bring some stuff around, but I expect an explanation or something afterwards."
>He drops her armor beside yours, then slips out with another glance.
>"-Oh uh."
>His head pops back in.
>"Whelp, looks like you got a visitor anyways!"
>He pulls the curtain open a bit, and Minuette-
>-You freeze and try to blend in with the wall.
>"Now I don't know the situation, but I hope you all make up. If you kiss, make sure I'm here though."
>Now he disappears, leaving Minuette standing just inside the room, donning a look of sympathy.
>"...Wow, you both really got it bad."
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>>30108702
>>30109078
I take care of about twenty trees and seven bushes in my orchard.
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>>30110495
The oblivious jokes hurt like a Carlos pun.
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>>30110495
>anon's only wish is to join in if they makeout.

Truly a gentleman and scholar.
>>
>>30065660
>With the help of your newfound ability, the journey back to your family apartment is far quicker than the outbound trip.
>You’ve resolved not to think about your meeting with Anonymous until you are safe at home.
>In the meantime a few limitations to “bolting,” as you’ve decided to call it, have made themselves known.
>First, it’s not true teleportation, in the manner you’ve been told trained unicorns can travel.
>While passing through one of the checkpoints on Coltwin’s Bridge, a guard had moved partially into your path as you bolted.
>You still ended up where you intended to, but the impact had knocked the breath from your lungs and sent the guard sprawling to the ground.
>Second, it is difficult to use when not focused.
>Say, while sprinting away from several now-alert guards.
>Sure, it’s still useable, but you won’t end up precisely where you want to, slamming into the edge of a rooftop and scrabbling for purchase instead of landing neatly on top of it.
>Finally, you arrive on the ledge outside your bedroom window, and glance around at the sky.
>The moon is a pale glow behind low-hanging clouds, telling you that you’ve got a few hours to sleep still.
>You ease the window open and back into it, hooves feeling the soft sanctuary of your bed.
>As you pull the window closed, the cold and wind of the streets of Damwall give way to warmth and quiet.
>“What are you doing?”
>With a jump, you turn clumsily on the bed to find Mellow Drizzle standing in the middle of your room, a quizzical expression furrowing her brow.
>>
>>30111107
“Uhhhh, I. Well I was, um…”
>You never were the type to sneak out after dark, so you don’t have any stock answers on standby.
>Mellow’s golden eyes widen, and she gasps as if she’s discovered your secret.
>“Sol, do you,” she pauses, looking around as if to verify no one else is listening, “have a coltfriend?”
>Oh for the Outsider’s sake.
>Your mouth flops wordlessly for a moment, Mellow grinning smugly up at you, before you decide your course of action.
“Well, maybe. A little.”
>The noncommittal and nonsensical answer does little to quell the glee of the tiny detective before you.
>“You know you’re an adult now, Solemn. You don’t have to sneak out of windows at night to see your coltfriend anymore. Well, not that you ever had one to sneak out to before.”
>Yeah, just keep twisting that knife, Drizzy.
“Well, I guess this is just me making up for lost times and experiences then, isn’t it?”
>Mellow giggles, apparently accepting the explanation.
>“You’re funny, Sol,” she replies, before her tone shifts to somber.
>“I miss you a lot. So does dad.”
>You breathe a heavy sigh, equal parts relief and exhaustion.
“I miss you too. What are you doing in here anyway?”
>Mellow scuffs a forehoof along the floor, as if inspecting something keenly interesting.
>>
>>30110522
That's a big orchard
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>>30111111
>“Do – do you remember when we were young? And in the Month of Rain it would storm so bad I couldn’t sleep?”
“Of course. But it’s a calm night tonight, nice and quiet.”
>You think you know where she’s headed with this, but you want to hear her say it.
>“I know. But I kinda miss something about back then.”
>You smile, slightly teasing but warm all the same.
“Soooo, what are you saying?”
>“Solemn, would it be okay if – if I slept with you tonight?”
>Shrugging your coat off and hanging it over the bedframe, you skootch over and snuggle beneath the covers, making room for your little sister.
>Mellow beams and crawls up into the bed, pulling the covers over herself and instantly gravitating to your side.
>The filly’s warmth seeps into you, and the bed is soon sleep-inducingly warm.
>You nuzzle your sister’s neck, feeling her melt into your hooves a little more in return, and sink deeper into the pillow.
>“Thanks, Sol,” your sister mumbles drowsily before the beginnings of soft snoring overtake her.
>You don’t bother replying, but you decide that your troubled thoughts can wait until morning, and drift into a deep, dreamless sleep.
>>
>>30111116
And I'm off to try for some of that deep dreamless sleep myself. Thanks for the updates today to all the writefags.
>>
>>30111111
AAAAYYY LMAO CHECKED
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>>30111111
>>
>>30111111
>>30111197
>>30111164
Praise the Outsider?
>>
>>30109840
Nice.

>>30110495
>Always looking for somepony to drop their paperwork on, those two
I got accused of doing similar. Yet, when I go on a vacation/holiday for more than a week either NOTHING gets done or shit hits the fan because the complainers don't know how to fix something with it breaks.

>leaving Minuette standing just inside the room, donning a look of sympathy.
Oh, hey, maybe she can magic something up to help. Smell concealment spell maybe?

Thanks for the update Blu!

>>30110522
I can't keep a houseplant alive even if my life depended on it.

>>30111149
Awww, a warm fuzzy end to a good update. Thanks Whiskey, good night and rest well.
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>>30111149
an interesting and sweet update.
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>>30111111
Exquisite digits, sir. And a pretty damn good story too.
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>>30110495
>>Now he disappears, leaving Minuette standing just inside the room, donning a look of sympathy.
>>"...Wow, you both really got it bad."
kek
>>
>running low on posts
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>That feel when you forget to sage on the last pic.
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New thread>>30112160
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>>30110495
>"Now I don't know the situation, but I hope you all make up. If you kiss, make sure I'm here though."
this Anon knows what's up
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>>30111111
DOUBLE TRIPS
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>>30111149
Mellow Drizzle is small, cute and perfect
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This thread is run by a seriously autistic homophobe who gets triggered by the mere mention of a stallion.
Thread posts: 502
Thread images: 81


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