RGRE: Reversed Gender Roles Equestria

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>>29814212
i want to hold her claws with my waifu while i breed her

>>29814212
I will corrupt that little horse girl.

What would constitute, or at least help constitute a well balanced, self sufficient (in a sense) herd? Someone to make and mend clothes? Someone to help with the cooking? Someone to help enchant various things to make them more useful?
This may or may not be important.

reposting prompt
from
>>29814155

>Single Anon is bros with Spike
>Ember comes for a diplomatic meeting
>Anon flirts with some of the lower dragon delegation, helped by their predator fetish
>Spike sees this and asks for help with his main crush
>Worse Whorse (after Trash)
>Anon helps Cyrano spike to woo his lady friend "Rarity"
>Accidentally ignites Embers spark for Spike with accidental apex predator wooing advice
>Rarity sees through spike and falls for Cyrano Anon, with all his romance-schromance

>Ember pursues spike
>Rarity pursues anon
>Spike resents anon
>Anon doesn't want to spite his bro

>drama
wat do?

>>29814255
Easy.
>Woo Ember.
>Send Rarity Spike's way with a bit more help.
>Fuck Ember full of your young.
>Start the first herd with dragons ponies and griffons.

>>29807784
See this

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>>29814295
>Anon finally learns why he's so popular amongst Ponyville's pegasus population

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>>29814339
>you will never inadvertently molest a large portion of Ponyville's pegasus population
>they like it

>>29814295
>Apparently Anon is a literal incubus corrupting the minds of mares for his own nefarious purposes that the princesses will not comment on.

>>29814381
>incubus
I really want to read something like this.

>>29814352
>Anon is unaware of his bad-touching
>Begins a relationship with some mare
>Jealous, several pegasus mares tug feathers out of their wings and make angry crowing noises when they see Anon and his marefriend

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>C'mon Anon, you can do this. Just like Celestia instructed.
>Get in there, strut your stuff and finish this war before it begins.
>Both dragonesses that lead you here open the wide door in front of you.
>As you step inside you notice the only occupant sitting atop her tremendous horde.
>The door behind you slams shut, leaving you alone with the royal dragoness.
>A few solid gold coins topple and roll from the gigantic pile as she slithers down from her vantage.
>"So, you are the pitiful creature that has threatened my kingdom?"
>She crawls over to you, serpentine and dangerous.
"Well, more like 'bartered with'."
>Her eyes narrow as she stands up at full height in front of your, her hot breath escaping her fiery mouth as she speaks.
>"You dare to insult a Queen by wagging your silvery tongue, beast!?"
>You are about to flinch when you notice her full height is still a whole foot shorter than you.
>She seems to notice too if the indignant yet surprised looks she's giving you is anything to go on.
>You gain a sly grin.
"Don't play dumb with me Emby"
>Her face takes on a tiny blush as you give her a pet name.
>"Insolent male whelp! You dare-"
>You grab her by her scaly waist; pulling her close to your body.
"We both know what my kind is capable of, Dragon."
>Her face falters at your actions and words, she desperately tries to keep the facade of stoicism up, but her growing blush betrays her.
"The war would be ultimately fruitless."
>You run your hand down her side, resting it on her smooth ass cheek.
"I would 'spear' every dragoness that comes close."
>Her face shows open fear now, the wetness on her thighs indicates her arousal however.
"Luckily, I come to you with a compromise."
>You slap her on the ass, causing her to yelp.
"Sacrifice yourself to me, and no dragoness will feel the wrath of my 'spear' or 'silvery tongue'."
>She breaks from your grasp, falling to the ground and shuffling to her horde desperately.
"You on the other hand, will feel them daily."

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>>29814409

>Anon shares human stories about dragons
>Sigurd, Saint George, all the classics
>Twilight is horrified at Anon's casual attitude toward the systematic genocide of a species

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>>29814409
oh my

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>>29814339
>>29814352
>The entire Wonderbolts squad appears in Ponyville
>They have one mission:
>Generate enough lift to permanently move Anon's house, and him with it, into the clouds

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>>29814409
I want to dominate Ember the dragon lord sexually

>>29814484
>She's also in awe of the dragon gods of old.

>Socially-awkward pegasus wonders if she's part of a herd after Anon absent-mindedly pats her on the back
This new birb information is amazing.

>>29814409
Diamonds are soft compared to my cock at this moment.

>>29814530
I NEEEEEED IT

>>29814530
>>29814612
>"A-Are we married now?"

You know, this bird-molesting info really sheds new light on the way that Rainbow Dash would go to Anon for a back/shoulder massage after a workout.

>>29814409
I-Is this a prompt? Can I write this?

>>29814671
Go ahead

>>29814513
DEMAND NOW!

>>29814295
Make it actually tie into RGRE you cunts. So many prompts, yet so few stay in line with the thread.

>>29814624
>just shows up next morning in his house making him breakfast
>anon doesn't even ask why just rolls with it
>crazier stuff happens in horse-land anyway, free homemade breakfast is nothing to sneeze at

>socially awkward to the point of silence
>always around him somewhere
>her feathers are always sticking out of his cloths no matter how many he cleans off

>so socially sheltered she's constantly blushing at all his cloths
>Anon never knows they are horsemarried, but is the lewdest with all his platonic affection

>She's aggressively protective of him
>he doesn't quite know it

>Everything was going fine, until the fire nation attacked (her first heat)
>she's doesn't want to damage her lewd virgin husbando
>she asks him what the birds and the bees are
>he tries to explain as if to a friend
>her lust filled mind just takes over
>rape

>It's 7/4
>It's raining prompts
Hallelujah

>>29814706
And apparently missiles. https://www.rawstory.com/2017/04/the-united-states-just-launched-50-tomahawk-missiles-against-syria-nbc/

>>29814671
Just a short, Anon. Feel free.

>>29814706
>Raining prompts
>Minimal writefaggotry
Like clockwork

>>29814771
wat?

this is why we cant have nice things

>>29809777
Who wrote this story?

>>29814771
Give me a break Anon, this next chapter is 6000 words long and a bitch to edit. Shorts are the best I can offer right now.

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"Oh Shiny I know you want a foal but you know that alicorns are sterile."
>"Oh is that the problem? That is easy to fix!"
>You give him a confused look
"What do you mean? How can you fix that?"
>Shiny gets up from where he was on the couch and rushes to the phone
>"Well I~ cant fix that. There is one pony who can."
"Shiny please tell me you aren't calling Twily. I love the girl but I would rather her not use my body as a science project."
>He chuckles that cute little chuckle of his
>"No no no. You see the Sparkle family has an old friend who helps in times like this. We call him "The Surrogate""
"The surrogate what?"
>"Just the surrogate. You see any time a sparkle mare cant get pregnant the family calls him up. For some reason he can imprenate even sterile mares and his foals always come out strong. That is why house Sparkle is the most numerous and magically inclined noble house. He has been doing his job for CENTURIES."
>Your jaw drops as he explains
"Wait, centuries? So he is some sort of withered old stallion?"
>An image of an impressively ancient stallion fucking you makes you shiver
>You love Shiny but you are not sure you are into wrinkly old cock
>"Oh no he doesn't age. Also he isn't really a pony. He is a human and...well he is sort of like a minotaur but with less...cow?"
>You cant even picture it
"So you are going to call him up and...what?"
>"Oh well he will come and you two will"
>He scrunches his nose and motions with his hooves
>"And when he is done you will be pregnant. Now shush I need to make a call."
>You sit and think about some minotaur plowing your slit
>It doesnt take long and you feel the juices flowing
>"Hey dad? Yeah well it turns out that Cadence is sterile. Is there any chance you could call Anon? Oh he is in the room right now! Great! Can you get him a ticket to come over? Thanks! Also you might tell Twilight now is the time if ever. You know she has trouble talking to stallions. Alright Love you. Bye."

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>>29814824
>He hangs up the phone and turns to you
>"He will be here in a week! I hope you are ready to be a mom cause when he is done you will be one."
>You want to be excited about the prospects of parenthood
>The only problem is you are far to excited about getting a guilt free romp with some exotic stallion.
>Him knocking you up in the process just makes you wink all the faster

>>29814781
>>29814808
You both misunderstand. I'm not complaining, just pointing out the difference.

I'm actually looking for something to write about, but nothing has sparked interest.

>>29814807
It's Trevis. From Xenophilia Thread.

>>29814839
we just came off last thread with the discord autist so you can see how belittling promptfagging would look in poor form old chap

besides, what sparked your interest last time?

>>29814824
>"Hey dad?
My fucking side.

This is the true RGRE.

>>29814771
>>29814252
Not him, but I am trying to gather opinions for something.
Guess posting at the start didn't help as much as I thought.

Do you remember when I wrote stories?

Pepperidge farm remembers.

Maybe you too will remember this story - it starts off from here: https://pastebin.com/FRFeTU3N

===================
>"No."
"Mmm."
>"Nonny, ahm' serious-"
>You rest your hand on Applejack's cheek, gently nudging her out of the way
>"W-we can get whatever it is you need tomorrow, Anon. We can all go together an-"
"Flutterbutt, girls, come on. It's been like, 5 hours and I'm sick of this shit. Let me just go-"
>You feel a tight, vice-like grip on your legs, and look down to two bright blue, wet eyes. "NoooOoooOoOOOOooo~"
>Sighing, you let your arms hang at your sides - which your pegasai mares take as an opportunity to form voltron on you
>You're apparently the very warm core now
>Also known as ANON, THE DELICATE LITTLE FLOWER
>And it's been about 3 days since your tomato incident
>Your completely harmless, somewhat tasty tomato incident. No matter what you say or do, your herd now refuses to let you out of their sight.
>On one hand, it's nice having the girls around so much - you really get to have some good conversations and learn about their pasts and really... just bond
>They also help around your house, sprucing it up to be a little more pone-friendly
>And they're more than happy to help with some of the houseprojects you've been meaning to knock out
>It really *is* useful having a mare aroun-
>You grumble internally at the realization
>Fuck. This place is getting to you
>On the other hand, they're fucking everywhere around you all the time forever
>At first it was SUPER COMFY
>But then they wanted to follow you into the kitchen... every time
>And hang out with you on the couch when you wanted to read... every time
>And make sure you were escorted everywhere - even to your mailbox... every time
>You had to draw the line with 'helping you bathe' or 'watching you poop' but, knowing the girls, there was probably a secret hole or two-way mirror now installed

>>29814921
YOURE BACK

>>29814921
>N-not like you posed while drying off or anything, b-baka
>You had to be adamant and put your foot down when they wanted to help you and a few of the guys burn the traditional "welcome, You're such a great ADDITION to our town" plusses infront of Zecora's booth
>It's called "GUY'S Night Out" for a reason, girls!
>Anyway
>You've been fighting with your herd all morning - with a lunch break mind you - and now into the early afternoon over
>Get this
>Going to the ponice station to fill out a report.
>Yeah. Going to the most secure little building in the middle of town is super-deadly
>"But that doesn't mean you won't get foalnapped on the way there, Nonners! Someone was hunting for YOU! Besides, paperwork is terrifying-"
>You wiggle your feet, gently tummy-booping Pinkie
"First, ponko, what have I told you about reading minds?"
>"Sooooo-rrrryyy~"
"Mmm. Second, I've been in this town now for over a year or so. I'm physically stronger than a majority of ponies-"
>"But not all of them, Anon!"
>A monochrome mane floods your vision as Daring Do hover-nuzzles your front, gently alighting onto your chest
>Finally finishing forming your pega pony power armor
>"Trust me! There are some jungle tribes that even *I* don't tangle with - there are some in the Amarezonian whose colts can even beat a grown mare into a pulp! And you're not trained in any form of self-defense-"
"I don't need self-defense when I've got THESE GUNS-"
>You pull your arms from your side and flex your MASSIVE BICEPS
>in your mind.
>In reality you start to struggle against your pegaponypowerarmor, which only encourages them to tighen up
>Come on, you can beat two ponies!
>I mean, one of them is an athlete, so...
>You focus on the arm Fluttershy is clamped down on
"-THESE.... GUNNNNSSS~"
>Come on you fuck
>COME ON IT'S YOUR RIGHT ARM - SWIFT, JERKING MOTIONS IS ALL IT'S GOOD FOR
>YOU HAVE TRAINED CEASELESSLY ALL YOUR LIFE FOR THIS MOMENT

>>29814927
>You miss the look your mares are giving each other as you focus all your inner chi on your right fucking arm
>You imagine circles of power eminating from your hand
>It burns with an awesome power
"-UUUUUUNNNNSSSS~"
>"A-anon, love, please-"
"UUUUHHH- HOW. HOW?"
>A purple head peeks around the corner, looking you up and down with a soft smile. "Well, firstly, Rainbow Dash is an athlete-"
>Sighing, you relax your muscles, staring nonplussed at Twilight
"Yeah, but Flutters? The sentient, soft downy pillow of the group?"
>"H-hey, I am not soft! I am p-padded and c-cold weather r-resistan-"
>"-I mean, to be fair she does wrestle bears, Anon."
>You blink and then look at Fluttershy, who mumbles softly into your shoulder as she makes eye contact with you
>"...s-sometimes Mr. Bear doesn't take his medicine..."
>You sigh
>"... so like I was saying, Anon. You could get foalnapped, you could get hurt or even raped out there!"
"I'm not totally defensel-"
>"Anon you can't even shake off a small frolic of ponies; you don't have the muscle density to-"
>Your eyes go wide
"Are you saying-"
>Twilight continues, talking slightly over you
>"I'm just saying you don't train - you're not strong enou-"
>THIS LITTLE HORSE JUST SAID YOU DIDN'T LIFT
>DO IT! DIG DEEP
"HUUUUUUUU-"
>As one your group sighs
>"Anon, babe, come on, it's no-OOAHAAOOOH~"
>Rainbow's complaint dies in her throat as you dig in deep and find that special kernel, that spark of light that makes man dominant on his own home and on every planet he treads upon
>That special thing that makes all of mankind unique
>That regardless of species we come across, regardless of time, culture or even ethics
>We will always have the ability to twist teats on demand
>Rainbow moans and fidgets on your left arm, before growling and biting your shirt
>But the most important thing is that her hooves have released from your sides, now gripping your arm properly
>Which means you can move it

>>29814933
>You look at Fluttershy again, and she eeps softly as she feels your arm turn against her belly, hand splayed against her crotch
>She relents
"There, see? Stronger than pones-"
>"Anon that proves nothing."
"Daring. It's Ponyville-"
>"So?! IT HAPPENED ALREADY."
"And I'm just saying, I lived quite alone before you pones came into my life-"
>"And that thought keeps me up at night, Anon! Based on my observations of our time with you, Before us you had a 68% chance of daily accidents-"
"-I'm all arms and legs-"
>"-a 21% chance to lose contents in your messenger bag when you went out-"
"Look, none of your horse clothing has pockets in it and sometimes I forget-"
>"-and a 7.0408% likelyhood that your background ara-ara-ing at townsponies' antics could rip the fabric of space asunder, plunging all of Equestria into the gibbering maw of the blind idiot god! And that's higher than during my battle with Discord!"
>Your lightning-quick mind comes up with the most delicious comeback
>You fight the mighty desire to cover your mouth and fufufu like a faggot
>Focus on the prize, anon
"I mean, it's small enough to be harml-"
>" My calculations are within two Standard Deviations, Anon."
"So-"
>"STANDARD. DEVIATIONS. ANON."
>You throw up your hands - which means you basically raise the asses of Rainbow Dash and Fluttershy to the ceiling - in exasperation
"For Fuck's sake, girls! I can't be housebound forever-"
>There's a pause
>...
>You don't like this pause
"No."
>"Now Anon, We can do some really interesting things with illusory magi-"
"No."
>Twilight scrunches up, sitting down with a hearty *fwump* onto the hardwood floor
>"W-we just wanna protect you, nonners~"
>You look down at Ponkapo
>She looks up at you, her eyes sparkling with honest joy
>"You're my special ingredient~"
>NNNNGGGHHH
>You sigh, trying to mask how hard that hit you
>It's like trying to mask a fart with a cough
>Ineffective, at best
>Draws attention to you, at worst

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>>29814921
S-Sempai?

>>29814939
>Your mares 'awww' softly, with a stage-whispered 'gottem' eminating from your knees
>Damn you, ponka po.
"Look. We have to come up with some sort of compromise, ok? I may not be an independent stallion no mo, but I sure as shit won't be escorted for the rest of my life-"
>AJ sighs
>"Ahnon, none of us are tryin' to shadow ya yer whole life; but there is somethin' goin on, and ah just wish you weren't such a hardheaded colt an' could see that!"
>Silence falls over your family again
>Rarity clears her throat
>"If you all would stop arguing for just a few moments, I have an idea."
* * *
"This is dumb."
>"It is not."
"This is dumb and it makes me feel like I'm 5."
>"Well you're very handsome and loved for a 5 year old - who knows? Maybe you'll grow up to be someone-"
"This is dumb and it's gonna backfire and then you're all gonna feel stupid-"
>Rainbow Dash floats next to you, her face fighting *so hard* to keep from breaking into a grin
>"I-I... I thi-hhh, it's great-"
>Biting her lower lip, she lands, turning away
>But you see her body shaking
>You know what's going on
>Someone's gonna get twisted tonight
>You sigh, feeling another strap get magically tightened across your stomach
>"Hehe, I think it's super-duper, Nonny! Gives us urf ponies enough hoofholds to climb onto you and protect you from all angles!"
"Pinkie, you just want to use me as a jungle gym and get your scent all over my body-"
>"So? Two butterflies, one net Anon!"
>You grumble softly
>"I-I think it's a wonderful solution, Anonymous. I like hanging out with you."
>You look at flutters flatly
"Thanks. You're the good horse."
>"Eeeeeeee~"
>Fluttershy pulls the leash she's holding in her hoof up to her neck, nuzzling it happily
>See, at first, when Rarity broke out the harness and the leashes, you thought the answer was group sex
>Which, let's face it, is a pretty good answer
>But no.

>>29814926
AYYY
>>29814945
I noticed you, anon...
>>29814949
>The answer was to apparently put you in "an innovative contraption I've seen Minotaur bulls use to manage their rambunctious calves with"
>AKA a fucking toddler harness
>But don't worry kids, it gets 'better'
>You have 7 leashes - all attached to a particular strap on your harness
>And each one of your mares has a leash
>So, technically, you're free to meander about
>You just have this... bubble of mares that follow you
>It's like a dog walker, except, yanno
>not.
"This is going to backfire and cause a raid wipe and then you're gonna get kicked from the guild-"
>Twilight smiles to herself, lowering a clipboard. "Hoenstly, Anon, this is a brilliant-"
>"Thank youuu~" Chimes Rarity from the dining room, putting away her raw materials
>"-and elegant solution to our problem-"
>"Oh darling, nibble the clit~" Rarity stage-moans from the room over, her little theatre performance earning her a few magic-paper-ball-missiles
>"-pony's sake, Rarity! Anyway. This is a good idea Anon - I've run the numbers-"
"Never tell me the odds, C3P0."
>"-en percent chance of any minor injury, and only a one-point-eight percent chance of an injury resulting in any form of semipermanent bodily harm!"
>You look down at the beaming unicorn as she slides her pencil under the clip and then tucks the clipboard under her wing triumphantly, looking at you with the knowing smile of the right
>You look down on her with the potent gaze of the cynic
>She doesn't flinch
>"Ffffhfhfhf. Yhh thwo shd juhh fuhk ahrehy~"
>Twilight flicks her ear at Ponka po, the only pony properly positioned at the primary portal to ponyville
>aka the front door
>She can't stop cantering in place, spitting out her leash uh... hoofhold(?) from her mouth.
>"Because it's WALKIES, Anon!"
>You purse your lips
"...you all have pets already, though."

>>29814960
>Pinkie rolls her eyes. "Well yeah, but we can't make it uncomfortably lewd with *them*. That's just silly. Now~" She lids her eyes, puckering her lips to blow you a quiet kiss. "Come to Mistress Pinkie, let her walk you~"
>The house is totally silent
>"Th' beans in that mare..." AJ leans over to Rainbow, whispering ever so gently
>The silence hangs but for a moment until you walk over to Ponka
>She grins widely until you pull the leash from her mouth - and quick as a flash you're upon her
>"N-Nonny, no! NOT LIKE THIS~"
>A loop here
>A twist there
>"I created you - I can destr-"
>A boop-and-scrunch to seal the deal
>And now, tied up in your own leash, Ponka po proudly parades a pretty pink pony personal portable platform
>You take advantage of the sheer absurdidy of what's going on by picking her up and tying the final loop into your belt
>She's now carried on you like a sidearm
>"But my aalllpphhaaanneeeessss~"
>She squirms for a few moments, but since she's now your sidearm you reach down and start rubbing her ears
>"Nnnhgaaaaahh~"
>So that's the sound of her lizard brain taking over
>As she tries to bite your wrist while batting your arm in her hooves, you open the door and start on your way into town
* * *

>"Afternoon, Anon!"
"Uh... H-hi, Thunderlane."
>"Hey Anon~!"
"Caramel, good to see you."
>". . ."
"You're the good one, Big Mac."
>He nods at you as you pass by his stall
>So far, operation SEXY DANDELION has gone off without a hitch
>Minus the mare-gap that your pinkieholster has created
>(which only increased injury by 4.8%)
>nopony was able to come too close to you
>One of your girls would kindly intercept and shoo away - it was very effective, you have to admit
>Doesn't help that you still feel like a toddl-
>Oh
>Your hips jerk a bit to the side, turning to suddenly catch AJ's gaze
>"Ah! Ahm' sorry, Anon - I was just tryin' to get Applebloom's attention"
"Salright, uh-"
>You slow down just a bit, walking towards the orange apple

>>29814974
"Do you want to quickly swing by, I mean, we co-oOHF."
>There's another sharp jerk
>The complaints of three mares
>And the meaty thud of pegasus-on-dirt of a fourth
>As one your group stops
"Alright, how are we doing this-"
>Fluttershy, RD, Twilight, Daring and Ponka all respond at once
>"The alpha mare leads-"
>Oh
>You grin as the girls all look at each other; they share looks ranging from astonishment and shock to downright disbelief
>most of them are surprised that fluttershy included herself - but none are probably more surprised than flutershy herself
>If her sudden interest in hiding under her wings in the middle of the street is any indication, of course
>You clear your throat
"Um. Instead of... whatever this is probably going to be, how about the guy leads?"
>AJ chuckles and you kick a pebble in her direction
"No, I'm serious! Girls up front and above keep slack, girls behind know where we're headed so they keep slack as well - it works."
>"Mmmmmmm I dunno, Non-"
>Without looking you reach down and boop Ponka again, silencing her
"It's what we're doing. Happy guyfu happy lifu~"
>Groaning, the girls retake their positions, muttering amongst themselves
>"-but seriously, we can't let that stubborn streak keep happening-"
>"-I know, Daring, but let's just let him win this one; we've asked a lot-"
>Hmph.
>Poppa 'Non didn't raise no doormat!
>He also didn't raise no horsefucker, so....
>Rainbow Dash takes this opportunity to stretch, noticing your gaze had fallen on her in thought
>She doesn't break eye contact
>eh.
>Sorry Dad, bronze star
>There was an attempt
>You start walking again as one - and you quickly notice Fluttershy isn't moving

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>>29814921

>>29814980
>Upon closer inspection she's actually passed out - you can't tell if that's just due to shock or if since she covered her head with her wings, she thought it was night and needed to go to bed
>Pegahorses are weird, yo
>so after a few quick and gentle moments, you're now sporting a pegasus sidearm on your hip as well
>Dual-hand booping on demand and in public
>thepower.greyskull
>and you continue on your way
* * *

====================
>>29814921
>>29814927
>>29814933
>>29814939
>>29814949
>>29814960
>>29814974
>>29814980

Alright, done. My work's now at it's lowpoint, so I should have more time to write this month before it swallows me up again. I'll put it in the pastebin whenever - probably tomorrow.

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>>29814999
I love you so much... you don't know how much i can't wait to read it.

>>29815003
I love you too, anon.

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>>29814999
Checked

>>29814839
Post a cute pic and ask for prompts. Never fails.

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>anon treated with no fucking respect and then outright treated like an animal
I want to love the cute, but it's as bright as a fucking fog light that one

Can we get a cute prompt where anon has some fucking self respect, surely that exists
>twiggles acts like a cut
>do not enter cuck shed
>instead activate infinite boopworks

>>29814999
Sorry dude, Anon being treated like this is far from cute to me.

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>>29814927
>>COME ON IT'S YOUR RIGHT ARM - SWIFT, JERKING MOTIONS IS ALL IT'S GOOD FOR

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>>29814255
>wat do?
Easy answer.

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>>29814999
This was very silly.

>>29815148
>doomguy anon in RGRE
>portal altered definitions of "rip and tear" and "huge guts"
>now there is a land full of thirsty mares who all want the HMD for their HMD
>doomguy anon can only boop and tickle, especially those with huge tufts
>he's not locked in equestria with them, their locked in with him

>>29815202
>BFG
>Big Friendship Group-hug

>>29814999
That was cute, adorable and funny. We missed you BNW, please come by more often.

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>>29815220
>HUG AND CUDDLE HUGE TUFTS

>>29814844
Really?
I remember making the cap from this thread.

>>29814921
HOLY SHIT IT'S DARING DOUCHE!!!
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

>"ANON STAY OUT! CANT YOU READ THE SIGN!"
>You were about to walk into the barn when a high pitched voice stopped you in your tracks
>Looking around you see Apple Bloom glaring at you like you shit on her pillow
>Then you spot the sign taped to the barn next to her
>"Emergency Clubhouse: Poopheads and stallions not allowed"
"Oh, sorry Bloom but I need to get a shovel. You will not believe the mess I got into."
>You try to walk around her and and two more fillies block your path
>"Stay out you big jerk!"
>An orange clump of dirt, oh wait nevermind its just Scootaloo, yells at you
>"Y-yeah! No cooties allowed Anon!"
>Judging by the squeek that voice had to be Sweetie Bell
"Alright girls this was funny for a second but I really need to get that shovel before someone finds o-"
>You are inturrupted by a well aimed water balloon striking you directly in the face
>"Anon you were warned!" Its Bloom again "There is a cootie outbreak and you could be a carrier. Colts are easily susceptible to cooties!"
>You sigh and wipe the water from your face
"Girls I don't have cooties. Cooties aren't even real."
>"Yah-huh! Rarity told me that there was a cutie outbreak and I needed to go hide with the others. She told me to stay away from her and any stallions as they might be infected!"
>Pitty fills you as you turn to look at Sweetie Belle
>Poor pathetic child
>Parents foisted her on her sister and her sister drives her out of the house
"Fine! Whatever! If I cant go in there can you at least give me a shovel! I dont have long before someone notices!"
>"And give you the ability to dig in and infect us from behind! NEVER!"
>Pinching the bridge of your nose you fight the urge to punt Scoots all the way to Cloudsdale
"Fuck. Fine what do I need to do to prove I am not infected."
>The girls huddle up and start whispering to each other
>You consider making a run for the shovel but you notice that Scoots eyes are not leaving you
>After a few seconds they seem to come to a decision

>>29815475

>"IF you want to prove you are not infected you have to kiss Sweetie Belle-"
>"ON THE LIPS!" scoots interjects into Bloom's speech
>"Yeah on the lips. If she starts acting weird we know she is infected and that you are as well."
>"Girls I still dont know about this..." Sweetie whines
>At this point you dont care
>You snatch up Sweetie and bring her up to your face
>When she locks eyes with you she stiffens like a board
>Leaning forward you plant a mostly chaste kiss on her lips
>As you connect you feel her sag into your grip
>Quickly as it happened it was over and you set a still puckering purple haired pony back on the ground
>She seems to sit there dazed for a few seconds before looking around
>"I-is it over?"
"Yeah Sweets. Can I have my shovel now?"
>The other two girls circle around Sweetie wearily before finally nodding to each other
>"Yer good Anon. Go get that shovel."
>You rush in and grab it off the wall
>Not even sparing them a thanks you rush past the crusaders, rushing back to the orchard where you left the bod-
>At the last second you see a wide eyed AJ directly in front of you
>Somehow you managed to stop yourself without running her over
>"Anon what are you doin round here? Dont you know that the cooties are spreading around town. You should be hiding with the other stallionfolk."
>For the first time you pause and think about what happened
>The crusaders acting weird was a daily occurrence. AJ was unflappably boring though.
"Uhh what are the cooties AJ?"
>"Don't ya know Anon? The cooties are a magical disease that is passed on through contact. It causes a mare to lose control of herself and try to run anything that moves. That's why it taint safe for you to be out when its goin round town."
>Fuck
"So hypothetically if I was attacked by a mare and I beat her senseless while she was infected it wouldn't be my fault?"
>She stares at you like you are mad

MORE NORDPON!

>>29815477

>"I guess not. Why do you ask?"
>You shake your head
"And hypothetically if I then kissed a fil...mare would she be infected."
>AJ is starting to look worried
>"Maybe."
"And...this is all hypothetical of course, if I were to leave said mare alone with two other fillies to go bury the body of the first mare the other two would be infected?"
>AJ stares at you in realization and horror
>"ANON! WHAT HAVE YOU DONE?"
>You brandish the shovel to keep her at bay
"BACK UNLESS YOU WANT THE COOTIES!"
>She jumps back away from you
"SORRY AJ! THE CRUSADERS ARE IN THE BARN AND DASH IS UNCONCIOUS IN THE BACK ACRE. SEEYOUINAFEWWEEKSBYE!"
>You throw the shovel at her and book it as fast as you can

Started as cute but I have no idea how it ended where this did. I do not apologize at all though.

>>29815490
You can't end on such a cliffhanger. It's illegal.

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Thread needs more NMM

>>29815591
>Nightmare Moon makes it public knowledge that she's keeping Anon as a concubine
>In private, things are different
>After a long day's work, she goes to her room and removes her armour/regalia
>She immediately collapses onto her bed in exhaustion and bats at Anon until he starts giving her kisses and belly rubs

>"Those fools have no idea who they're dealing with."
"Mm-hmm..."
>"I'll show them, Anon. I'll show them all!"
"I know you will, sweetie."
>"...did you make that salad I like?"
"It's in the fridge; second shelf on the left."

>"You'd tell me if my staff were treating you improperly, wouldn't you?"
"Of course I would."
>"If they can't treat a colt right, then they have absolutely no business having the honour of serving me."
"You'll be the first to know if they step out of line, okay?"
>"...you're very precious to me, Anon. You're the most beautiful and brightest star in my night sky."
"I love you too, Moons."

>>29815622
>bats at Anon until he starts giving her kisses and belly rubs

NMM is good kitty

>>29815622
>NMM sealed Celestia and Twi in the moon
>Realized that she fucked up
>Celestia always did all the hard work even before
>Anon helps calm her down and gets her to rethink her rule
>She slowly becomes less evil though she wont put up with bullshit
>She also becomes more and more attached to Anon

>>29814999
>>Upon closer inspection she's actually passed out - you can't tell if that's just due to shock or if since she covered her head with her wings, she thought it was night and needed to go to bed
Nigga that's adorable.

>>29814999
You had a few misspelled phrases in a few places, but otherwise that was adorable.

>>29815630
>>29815622
>>29815591
The timeline where NMM rules is the best timeline

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>>29815591
>Nightmare Moon takes on her own form after being purged from Luna.
>Reluctantly gives up.
>Now she spends her days giving Luna shit for being a a gangly beta autist.
>It's all magnified since Nightmare is more or less a turbo-chad bad filly that can keep even fickle stallions orbiting her.
>Meanwhile Luna just wants to be left alone to do her own thing.

>>29815477
>and try to run anything that moves
one of these words don't fit together here.

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>>29815622
>>"...you're very precious to me, Anon. You're the most beautiful and brightest star in my night sky."
daww

>>29815663
Fuck the evil out of Luna, Anon.
Then fuck the evil.
You know you want to do it.

>>29815490
That is fucking hilarious, if this is what heat would be then I would support you 100%, and I bet LaP liked it too what with hating Dash an everything.

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>>29815591
Stole this from Nof via archive.

>You are Nightmare Moon, Queen of the Dark.
>And you sigh contently as you settle on the human sized loveseat lengthwise, letting you stretch out.
>The pillow you rest against has your lover's robust aroma, making the furniture that much more relaxing.
>The book in your azure magical grip wavers, then is set down the coffee table as you decide to simply doze.
>You could watch the "television" invention that had taken Equestria by storm in recent years, but decide against that as well.
>You roll your eyes after looking at the large box of a machine in the living room. A box that plays moving images broadcast from far away. What will they think of next?
>A sudden scent and the sound of sizzling coming from the kitchen made your nose twitch and ears perk.
>That must be your beloved preparing dinner.
>Without warning, your stomach grumbles, wanting the delicacies being prepared in the other room.
>It still amazes you that your beloved can turn common fare into mouth-watering cuisine. The sort that puts the royal chiefs of old to shame.
>Or maybe your relationship is coloring your opinion? You find it hard to speak ANY sort of ill about the father of your unborn foal.
>Your stomach growls again, reminding you that you eat for two now.
>Clicking your tongue in annoyance, you shift on the couch and resign yourself to waiting.
>Not even 2 months in, and the small lump on your belly is making you ravenous at just the smell of food.
>It would be unseemly for a queen to try and beg food out of her soon-to-be husb-
>Wait, you aren't a queen anymore. You have no need to hold yourself to such stifling standards.
>With a small smile, you rise and walk to the kitchen, intent on trying to sneak away with a treat.
>Idly, you wonder what Celestia and Luna are doing.
>Whatever it is, they can't be enjoying themselves as much as you are.

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>>29815767
I remember this.
>tfw already read everything NOF has written

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>>29814921

>>29814921
Holy fuck! Why u have to drop this when I need to sleep?!?

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everybody wants a berdherd
the most sought after kind of herd in equestria

>>29814999
damn nice to see you back to it BNW this was nice

>>29815991
>implying
aliherd objectively best herd

>>29814999
I had forgot how much I loved ur shenanigans. Now I remember.

Anon is friendless in RGRE
He hires a gigolo to cuddle.
Since prostitutes are stallions, it would make sense that gigolos are good looking mares.

>>29816175
Huh...that would be true. Would that make Fleur a gigolo?

>>29816182
Well, is that would depend on whether Fluer is receiving payment for her services.
Maybe that's just a rich relative?
Or a Person Of Interest
Or an assassination target.

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>10
Dead.

Ayy. Pastebin updated here: https://pastebin.com/dSiqwp6F

>>29815148
>>29815156
>implying his mares' hubris won't come back to bite them terribly in the flank
You may wanna read Overprotective Celestia: https://pastebin.com/juxfuj7P

>>29815165
I mean, I'm not wrong...

>>29815181
Ye

>>29815230
Ofc. My writing schedule should be much more open this month, so I ain't goin anywhere. That said
>DD2 Last update March 2016
Holy shit this ride goes by so fast.

>>29815436
AAAAH

>>29815652
Birdhorses are always a cute

>>29815660
Yeah... I never write while sober. Sorry.

>>29815914
see
>>29815820

>>29816021
Aww, thanks! I hope to have another update soon.

>>29816040
Remember who you are, anon. Don't let Mufasa's death be in vain.

>Anon has an idea
>He takes a few magazines with him and goes over to the train station
>Inhaleing deeply he yells
"ANY MARE WANT TO FUCK? I WANT TO TRY SOMETHING AND I NEED A WILLING P...."
>At this moment he was bombarded with willing partners
>Choosing one at random, they head off to a seedy motel... which in equestria turns out to not have cockroaches and is closer to 4 star then 3 on earth, but for some reason rated one here
>As the mare gets on the bed to present, anon tosses the magazines on the bed
>She begins winking
"So here is the plan, I want to read porn while useing a pony like a sex doll"
>Winking intensifies
>Unable to speak she just nods.

>About 10 minutes in and many orgasims later, anon sees an image and pauses...
>He looks at her cutie mark, then at the image...
"Cool, so... You are a porn star miss..."
>She looks a bit shocked, but snaps out, manginging to pant out
>"Wooden... woodenlilly"
"Cool, so... have to ask, you bi or gay for pay?"
>Before she can answer, a vice like grip tells anon she is cumming again, his cue to go over the hump with her
>He picks her up from behind and slams in till they both make a mess of the bed.

>As the two pant and recover, anon is the first to move
"So... so there is another bed over there... want to ruin it too?"

just a thought that I had that may be fun to think of.

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>>29816664

>>29814238
lesbian gun horse is already corrupt

> Be Anon, trying to drink away the bad feels
> Considering the local bar only serves chocolate milk variations, it's not working too well
> You try to force the drunkenness
"Ye-you know what, Pinkie Ponko Plump Rump?"
> You frown blearily at her
> It's late, and you are kinda tired
> But isn't her hair supposed to be a big poofy, curly mess?
> You mean, it looks fine straightened, but that doesn't seem like her style
> She knocks back a shot of strawberry milk
> "Is it a guessing gaaaaame?"
> She gives you a half smile
> "I'm gooood at guessing games."
> Wow, no exclamation point, something's up
> Well, everyone has their own troubles, if they are at the Bitter Drink at this time of night
> You shake your head
"Nah, not that. Lemme tell you, when I was home, home on Earth. You know what? I didn't touch nobody. Nopony. Like, maybe shaking hands once a month. Thas'all."
> Pinkie shifts on her bar stool
> "Thas terrible! No hugs or snugs? Wait. Did you shake hands with uh, hehe, guys?"
> She waggles her eyebrows suggestively
> Damn pervert
"Yeah, I did. But never mind that. You know what happened when I got here?"
> Her brow furrows as she tries to remember
> "I gashped at you, and threw a party?"
"Mmm yes, that happened. But still, even here..."
> You take a sip of your chocolate milk
"Nopony touches me. Is a hug too much to ask?"
> Pinkie's eyes go wide
> "Can- can I hug you?"
> You open your arms wide
"Go for it."
> She hops onto your lap, wrapping her forelegs around you, resting her head on your shoulder
> You sigh in contentment, comforted by the warmth of another being
> You hold her close, rubbing little circles on her back
> She nuzzles at the side of your neck, and you feel your heart swell at the sensation
> You squeeze her sightly, nuzzling her neck
> It feels so good, at long last
> And for some reason, her hair is inflating and returning to its curly shape

>>29816757
> Be Pinkie Pie
> DO NOT GET WET, YOU REPEAT, DO NOT GET WET
> This poor stallion needs a snuggle buddy, not a fuggle buddy
> But maybe if you play your cards right...
> OH SWEET CELESTIA'S CAKE HOARD, HE'S NUZZLING YOU BACK
> DO NOT GET WET, DO NOT GET WET!

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>>29816761
>OH SWEET CELESTIA'S CAKE HOARD

Reading an old thread, had an idea from a post

Anon and some of his friends get drunk in the city while bla bla is doing blaa blaaaaa blaaaaaaaaaaaa, when they meet some unfriendly types. Imagine internet trolls in real life, but drunk and in equestria.

They get into a heated argument. Then one of them drops a bomb

>"You know what, do this world a favor an BUCKING KILL YOURSELF"
>Its like its the worst thing anyone can tell another to do in this world
>Many ponies are sad
>Some look about ready to defend your honor
>But all you can do is laugh
>A bit more drunk then you realize you let yourself go
>"The BUCK are you laughing at?"
"Thats how I ended up here in the first place"
>Anon gets uncomfortably close and tells the little shit in detail what he did and what the end result would have looked like
>More then a few ponies are sad, crying, or trying to hold their bile in
>Anons friends however, are stunned that they finally learned how anon came into the world.

>Next morning, anon doesn't remember shit
>He got drunk on the good stuff
>His friend shave no idea how to broach the bombshell he dropped last night.
>Thinking that maybe it was just anon lying again, he does that often, till they see the remnants of scar tissue

>>29816757
>Ponko Plump Rump
>Pinkie Pie rubs her ass with a nostalgic expression on her face.
>"I haven't been called that since horsecollege."

>>29816832
>I killed muhself pone! u donnut understand muh painis!

That prompt never stops being lame anon.
We get it, it's a children cartoon, wanting to off yourself is edge blah blah

>>29817313
>not knowing the "kill yourself brings you to Equestria" meme
maybe YOU should kill yourself instead, newfag

>>29816761
>> This poor stallion needs a snuggle buddy, not a fuggle buddy
Incorrect.

>>29814255
Who is Cyrano?

>>29817421
Fuck, what level of english did you even reach in high school

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>>29817421

>>29816832
So either Anon was telling the truth, or he was just talking about that old meme and his friends are misinterpreting a scar he got in like a dog bite or something for a suicide attempt.

>>29817438
inspired by that scar story, but less was he a junkie, did he kill himself kind of a setting. Anon offed himself for sure, but the ponies cant quite come to terms with how ok about it he is.

>>29817428
You do realise there are non-Americans on the internet right?

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>>29817421
>Who is Cyrano?
That's it
end everything right now
we done fucked up
go back to square one poeple

>>29817442
>Anon's friends slowly realize he legitimately thinks he's dead and is in the afterlife.

>>29817477
>A top-heavy car flips over and bursts into flames
>"Shit, how did this thing even make it onto the roads? Who signed this off?"
>>"Uhm, excuse you, don't you know that there are non-American car companies and manufactures out there?"

>>29817499
>pic
brb stealing of launch codes from president
must be of stop this insanity before it spreading

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>>29817499
Dire times...

>>29817499
>Puck? lol you misspelled "fuck"

Baby pegasi chirp like birds. Baby unicorns purr and mew like cats

>>29817717
Baby earth ponies go "HEE-HAW" like the filthy animals they are.

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>>29817723

>>29817723
kek

>>29817428
>>29817499
>>29817534
Ooh hey look, it's a pack of retards

>>29817809
>hey look some people who don't agree with me
>THEY MUST BE RETARDED XD

>>29817831
They are retarded because they think someone not knowing a fiction writer is a tragedy and proof that humanity has gone wrong.

>>29817856
ah. well i guess thats why you actually read what the argument is about before you reply. ill shut up now.

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>>29817723
Says the high and mighty unicorn who can't even mildly exert herself without complaining that she chipped her hoof

>>29817890
>doing something by hoof
>when you can magic stuff
Get a load of this mudpony cam.jpg

Andrew

>>29818296
Ryder

>>29814999
Oh it's you! Nice!

>>29817890
>Appul has a crush on Anon
>Anon is a lazybones
>Appul has trouble reconciling the idea of her perfect horsebando being allergic to work

>>29817856
>a fiction writer
>Cyrano
>a writer
>cant even read a title, calls others retarded

ITS OVER NICE KNOWING YOU GUYS

>>29814999
How is this the same Anon as the one who said

>"If you don't respect me, if you can't prove to me that you're trustworthy, if you can't show me that you give a damn about me - and not because I'm some exotic trophy"
>He leans over to your bedside - wow ya'll are close
>He grins toothily. "I'll kill you and eat the body."

>>29818735
>He grins toothily. "I'll kill you and eat the body."

Is this out of context? Were they joking around about how he eats meat? What the fuck.

>>29818994
I just realized how often I say "What the fuck." and that gives me an idea for a prompt.

>Anon says things like "Oh fuck." and "What the fuck." a lot.
>Estrus hits.
>Mares conveniently "mishear" him and "think" he's asking to fuck.

>>29818296
Jackson

>>29818506
>AJ wakes up every morning in Anon's arms
>Anon won't begin his day for another 4 hours and refuses to let Applejack go

>>29819002
>Rainbow Dash deliberately spills her drink all over Anon's shirt.
>"OOPS SORRY"
"Aw, fuck!
>"Fuck!? Don't mind if I do!"

I'd love to see something where Rarity is the kissless virgin who really only pretends to know what stallions like. Her behaviour is actually really cringy by pony standards, but not at all to "I was raised in a completely different culture" Anon.

>Rarity opens doors and pulls back chairs for Anon
>Her friends expect Anon to roll his eyes or get upset, but he just thinks it's sweet & silly and thanks her

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Most mares in RGRE prefer the Amazon position

>>29819059
Shepard.

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>>29819222
>222

>>29818735
Yeah man, Were is the character development ?

>>29818735
That whole thing semmed too much demeaning to me.

>>29819328
Wrex

>>29819650
Wruther

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>>29819185
>>Her friends expect Anon to roll his eyes or get upset, but he just thinks it's sweet & silly and thanks her
That sounds cute. I can just imagine her getting giddy and overexcited.

>>29816531
reading through DD again and i lost it at Toby..u the real mvp BNWF

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>>29819185
>>29819698
>Rarara is an unashamed turbo-fedora that isn't repulsive.
>She gets the guy like in the fairy tales and fanfics she totally doesn't read.
>A few brave mares try with normal stallions after seeing that.
>They get weird looks, offence, or (laughs in slut) from the stallions.

>>29819781
>She gets the guy like in the fairy tales and fanfics she totally doesn't read
Or write. Only total spergs would write that kind of stuff.

>Zephyr
How pathetic do you need to be to actually repel mares?

>>29820022
>5 mares to every 1 stallion
>Still repulsive
Poor bastard.

>>29820097
It's his fault. Don't pity failure.

>>29820097
That's kinda sad.

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>>29820097
>tfw the odds are overwhelmingly in your favour but your own horrible nature comes up on top every single time

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>Volvo will never make you her little bitch

>>29820253
>Volvo
Superior Germane engineered mare pussy only.

>>29820097
Zephyr actually doesn't look that bad except for the man bun and the stubble,
Hell if we take those away and improved his personality a little bit he might even look more like a model than Fluttershy does

>>29814255
>wat do?
Hide post.

>>29820253
Volvo was a brainless cunt who wandered blindly into a apocalyptic wasteland.

>>29820303
I want her to project her insecurities unto me by making me her dumb little pet

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I want to be Twilight's servant.

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>>29820246

>Anon's pony equivalent is already living with a herd of true waifus
>Since they're technically the same person, Anonpone allows Anonman to join them
>Anonpone is happy to have another stallion around the house, especially one he relates to so well
>The mares are just glad to have another dick to ride

>>29816832
>"Thats how I ended up here in the first place"
I demand moar please.

>>29820413
I want her to melt in the mist like the idiot she is

>>29815622
>>29815643
>>29815666
>>29815767
You realize you're basically writing green about Nyx, right?

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>>29820276
In fact...

>>29820439
>>The mares are just glad to have another dick to ride
wow such close and loving relationships

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>>29820423

>>29820574
brety gud

>>29820423
I want to see more ponies from behind because the way their mane is always over one shoulder - the shoulder that's facing away from me - bothers me and I want to know how it works.

>>29820434
Look at this unkempt jackass. Either he can't keep a clean room or he can't make a proper nest. I bet he can't even cook the lazy fuck.

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>>29820574

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>Littlepip will never mold you into her pretty mare

>>29820648
kek

>>29820662
Literally who is this this unicorn

>>29820689
The main character from fallout equestria

>>29820689
Fallout Equestria.

That's like not knowing what Cupcakes is.

>>29820689
huge lesbian. soulless murderer who decides her morals are above others who she judges to be "nothing but raiders" plunges the world thats already a shithole in a second war that kills of a lot of its resources.

still gets touted as a big damn hero.

>>29814237
I cant understand how, i mean, no one, at all, has commented on this, i mean, look at it... just, look. fuck

>>29820796
Seriously, need to censor the h*nd h*lding

>>29820786
So you're telling me that... Fallout Equestria will rape every stallion and enslave?

Now that will i read on greentext.

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>>29820858
>h*nd h*lding
m-muh christian thoughts

>>29820689
A pretty mare who did nothing wrong

>>29820861
>An actual apocalypse survivor ends up in FO:E.
>Everything is much more forgiving than a wasteland should be.
>Or maybe he's just tougher?
>The first raider team that tries to capture him to use as a rape toy has a bad time.
>A REALLY bad time.

>>29820949
>>29820861
>>29820662
There is already a thread for this, start it up again if it died.

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>>29820949
[CHEEKI BREEKI INTENSIFIES]

>>29820949
>anon the Currier in RGRfalloutE

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You're under arrest!

>>29820968
Fuck I laughed harder at that pic way more than I should have

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>>29820975

>>29820990
>Sweet talking the ponice mare into looking the other way when you fuck up.

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>>29820990
Bee hive

>>29820997
>Anon is riding his bicycle too fast
>Gets pulled over
>Flashes his dick and gets let off with a warning

>>29821006
I can't bee-lieve you just said that to me.

>Daring Do, and of course her nemesis Ahuizotl, both discover evidence that points to the lost city of Man
>(or lost continent, the legends are a little vague)
>Shenanigans ensue on the race to find the city and prevent Ahuizotl from using the lost magical human superweapons to take over the world
>It's under the sea for one, requiring them to deal with both seaponies and sirens before they can get to it

>Then when they get there, it's not empty ruins like they expected.
>Living breathing humans still live there, cut off from the rest of the world
>They may be a mere shadow of their former glory, but they still live.
>They're also (from Daring's perspective) RGR, led by King Anonymous

>To her immense surprise, for once in her life, she has an easier time convincing the natives that she's the hero and Ahuizotl is the bad one, because humans are more likely to believe a cute mare asking for help than a freaky whatever he is asking where they keep the really dangerous stuff.

>To his immense disappointment, there are no superweapons or crazy magical artifacts around.
>Unless you count HMD's and he don't swing that way.

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>>29821103

I dunno dude. There's that freaky hand thing on his tail, you know. Who knows what he gets up to with that thing.

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>>29820796
Don't you want to make love to your dragon waifu, Anon?

>>29821215

We are extensively practiced at ignoring things.

>>29821219
what

>>29820949
Unf~ please anon-kun.

>>29821103
>Unless you count HMD's and he don't swing that way.
Not yet... Royal Consort Ahuizotl has a nice ring to it, doesn't it?

>>29821276
no

>>29821276
>>29821293
Yes.

>>29814671
Still waiting on you, Anon. Only you can satisfy the dragonfuckers in the audience.

>>29821427
He is kill

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>>29820643
Yep

>>29820949
>FalloutAnon winds up in RGRE!FO:E
>Halfway through LittlePip's quest
>Pipboy says he's friendly
>Even though he's labelled a MareKiller
>Still a few feet taller than anyone
>His own dedication autism led him to min/max for stealth
>Skin-tight stealth suit
>covered in bags of loot
>creeps through raider/slaver encampments
>kills everyone
>takes everything that isn't nailed down
>tries to sell it to the nearest trader, they don't have enough caps
>invests thousands of caps in trade routes
>mares try to convince him to take them along, but he tells them they're too loud
>"Oh, I'll make you loud, too..."
"What?"
>"N-nothing."
>Puts scavengers and salvagers out of business
>There isn't a scrap for miles
>Derpy has it all
>Every mug, clipboard, empty bottle, scrap of ammo, or weapon
>Slavers want him for best sex slave
>Raiders start to worship him like a demon god they must appease
>Settlers want to repopulate the world with his seed
>Anon just wants more caps

>>29821603
So, how does one get five o'clock shadow on a face that is naturally covered in fur?

>>29821667
>>Anon just wants more caps
Welcome to my life. If only you know...... Fallout 4...
>Be me
>Better building shellter
>mfw no wood
>mfw have to find little box and trash

>>29821103
>It's just too bad she can't convince them she's a fertility goddess

>>29821671
>Thinks its a real five-o-clock
That's mold my boy.

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>>29821699
No, it's cinnamon.

I'd love to read a Hearts and Hooves story where various mares who are interested in Anon try and woo him. Maybe a scene or two with an actual stallion to really emphasize the difference in behaviour and expectations when it comes to Anon. maybe please

>>29821718
You mean a stallion as a wingman? Because there are no dick lovers here....besides Moondancer.

>>29821103

Ahuizotl is an ahuizotl.

RgrF:oE when?

>>29821768
Fo:E
f-fug mobile

>10
This is became a wasteland.

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>>29822024
ITS DEEEEAAAAAD

>>29822024
Threads been slowing down lately. April fools day nearly killed it for some reason though. I guess /mlpol/ drove off some of our regulars for a bit.

>>29822024
>>29822037
you fuckers allowed this.
>>29822045
Maybe. Doubt it though, their no crazier than what we usually have on the board.

>>29822045
i dont think so tim

>barbarian lord anon
>defeats Ladies and queens makes them into his harem
>several fiefs and 2 queens have already been brought low by non consensual hugging
>the latest queen looks beyond her castle walls and sees what she's up against
> THE BELLY RUBS CANNOT BE STOPPED

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ITS HAPPENING

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Jesus fuck why are the RGRE threads fucking always so shit?

>>29823070
Take a wild guess

>>29823070
Choose the drug:
>Discord
>/mlpol/
>People demanding greens or getting butthurt because the writefag don't write what people want.

>>29823125
It's about MLP 2017 movie moron. /mlpol/ is delete.

>>29823125
>People demanding greens or getting butthurt because the writefag don't write what people want.
that hasn't happened dumbass, the other two have though.
>>29823131
I guess this is as good a reason as any.

>>29821427
>>29821431
Not kill, just a lazy prick.

>>29814409
>You saunter over as she trys desperately to claw back up her hoard.
>All she ends up doing is going up two feet and slinging gems and gold everywhere.
>You slam your hands down on either side of her causing her eyes to widen.
>”S-Stop! I’ll burn you!” She threatens.
>You move your face closer and she begins to blow desperately.
>Sadly for her, dragons can’t breath fire when they’re aroused.
>You quickly take hold of the chance and grab the back of her head and begin to kiss her, your tongue exploring her warm mouth.
>She pushes desperately and finally pushes your face back as she begins gasping for air.
“Mmm, blueberry~”
>You murmur licking your lips.
>You lower yourself down a bit to meet with her moist crotch as she’s catching her breath.
“I wonder if these lips taste even better~?”
>You ask as you lick up her thigh.
>She tries to push you away again but you pin her arms down and she desperately begins to struggle.
>You being to lick away the fluid she has accumulated while sustaining eye contact as her struggles become more and more desperate.
“All that was for me? Emby you dirty girl~”
>”S-Silence h-how dare you talk like that to a dragon princESS!” She yelps out the last part as you begin to lick her.
>Huh, it really does taste like blueberrys.
>A few licks later and some panting.
>”Ah, I surrender! Please, I surrender!”
>You stop licking.
“So you aren’t going to attack Equestria?”
>”No! I won’t attack Equestria!”
“Aw, but we were having so much fun~”
>”Please…”
>You huff.
“Fine, but don’t forget I can always come back if you change your mind~”
>You let her go and she just lays limp gasping for air.
>As you walk out the door the guards outside shiver as you pass by.
>You wink at one and she passes out.
>You love being human.

There. Sorry it's short.

>>29823443
Finally, I was like reading this thread >>29810873

>>29821728
>You mean a stallion as a wingman?
No, just a scene with a stallion and a mare. It would establish standard behaviour for a mare and a stallion interacting with each other and would provide contrast to Anon's interaction with whatever mare is wooing him.

>>29822024
Holy shit, nobody posted on a cartoon image board in the wee hours of Saturday morning after enjoying their Friday night like a normal person? Zed's dead baby, Zed's dead!

>>29823125
>>People demanding greens or getting butthurt because the writefag don't write what people want.
Except this didn't actually happen and you're lying.

>>29823125
>Choose the drug:
>>Discord
fuck me is it this retard again

>>29823766
No, it's just someone listing common options people would think of for why the thread wasn't getting regular posts.
Pick your own adventure, in a sense.

>>29823939
oh. sorry, Anon.

>Be me.
>Be bored.
>Decide to look through the pastebin for someting to play for a bit.
>See something called Harmony of Hope.
>Decide to play it because I'm bored.
>Says it's a parody of some videogame.
>Don't care so I don't look it up.
>Choose the default name for the PC "John".
>Blow through the game in about an hour.
>See credits, devs name is "John".
>Just played some fags self-insert fanfic.

Why live?

>>29823939
Finally someone get it...

>>29823443
I NEED IT

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>>29823443
>you will never give a dragoness a fear-ladyboner

>>29823766
>everyone who holds X opinion is actually the same single guy
faggot

>>29814212
How do poners sweat? They have fur

>>29824627
except it was just 1 person being triggered by the discord you nigger

>>29824637
Horses sweat. So, it stands to reason that a poner would sweat.

>>29824652
>all anonymous posters
>you know who's really behind all of them
are you chanting this mantra because it terrifies you that more than one person holds an opinion you don't like, or are you under the delusion you can tell who is who on an anonymous board?

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>>29824704
>>29824652
We shitpost like this every day, it shits up the thread. Give it a rest Anons.

>>29824704
we could tell because his logic is retarded, he mass responded, and he had the self respect to not samefag approval

>>29824871
>opinions i don't like are retarded logic
>>>/tumblr/

>>29825052
it was less opinions and more self contradiction

>>29825052
No, his logic is retarded making him retarded.

>>29821215
sauce?

>>29821667
>raiders start to worship him like a demon god
More demonic folklore anon when?

>he can't be that bad, it's a stallion
>pure regret

>>29825483
Maybe they think he's one of those demons who live off of sexual energy.

>"Sure I'll grant you powers. But first, you gotta spend the night with me."

The mares see literally no downside to this.

Anon gets bored so he tries to entertain himself with what passes for equestrian culture. He borrows fillylove mangas from Twilight's library under the guise of research but really just wants to fap to lesbian mares.

Sythe

Anon baffles the fuck out of the ponies.

He's male because he has a penis, but socially and behaviourally is like a mare. When he's seen, that is.

He prefers to live alone in his little Everfree camp, and often moves when ponies stumble across him.

Cadence, being the nosy whorse she is, tries to set him up with a mare.

The catch? Magic goes haywire when interacting with him, often unpredictably for the caster.

Anon just wants to be left alone from this crazy bitch.

Anon's meeting with Luna is a disaster: on Nightmare Night, she tries to scare him. He throws her through a wall.

While ponies are outraged, Luna is happy: even if he has a dick, she's finally met someone who isn't a complete pansy in this day and age.

Thus, an odd bromance is formed.

Now, if only her sister would stop hitting on the increasingly annoyed Anon, and being a misandriast.

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>>29814409
>tfw knowing exactly who drew that picture and what it is

>>29825519
>anon isn't a demon
>he just has some cardboard horns and what i hope isn't some wierd kind of buttplug
>convinces occult nerds into having sex

Still no downside.

>>29825855
Naughty kid ^:)

>>29823704
Ah, that could be neat then.

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Wrote >>29791770 out of sheer boredom at like 2am (so sorry for any spelling mistakes). I'll dump it in a few minutes

>>29826467
>be bookhorse
>You're observing Anon as he sits alone at the cafe
>You're sitting alone too, glancing at him and making sure to look away awkwardly if he looks in your direction
>Other mares would go up and try to hit on him, but he just waves them off
>You're not sure why, but you find yourself strangely attracted to this human
>Probably because he's an outcast just like you are..
>His features were just so unlike anything you've ever seen before
>You've only ever glanced in his direction and you're already in love with every part of him
>You wanted to talk to him so badly, say something nice and make eye contact, but you had no idea how
>And you weren't gonna admit that to your friends, not in a million years..
>Especially not Rainbow Dash, she'd be laughing at you for Celestia knows how long
>You sigh and leave your table, leaving a few bits behind
>The cafe door opens with a jingle, and you turn to look at Anon one last time before you leave
>You're off to the train station, a ticket already in your satchel
>It's been awhile since your Grandma in Canterlot has had company, and she wrote to you earlier in the week asking you to come visit
>She even attached a prepaid train ticket to the letter, so how could you say no?
>As you hand the ticket to a bored looking mare and board the train, you can't help but keep thinking about Anon
>So far he hasn't really been interested in mares, but you know you could change that if only you knew how
>As you sit alone on the train, ensconsced in a book, you have a sudden epiphany
>What if your Grandma knew what it would take to catch Anon's interest?
>With being married to a stallion as handsome as your Grandfather, she had to know a thing or two about stallions
>You're suddenly a lot more excited about visiting your Grandma than you were initially...

>>29826480
>Some time later, you arrive at your Grandma's house
>She opens the door almost immediatly after you knock
>She greats you with a smile
>"Twiggles! I'm glad you swung by. Thought you'd never show up, and leave me all by my lonesome!"
>Your grandmother lets out a hearty laugh, and you can't help but smile a little as you walk into her house
>Even if age hasn't done her body many favors, at least it hasn't had an effect on her good old unicorn personality
>You take a seat on her living room couch, and she moves over to the refrigerator in her kitchen
>She magically takes two beers from the fridge and closes it with a hoof, looking over at you expectantly
>Although you shake your head, your Grandma tosses you a can anyways
>With a sigh, you set the can aside while Granma cracks hers open
>She knew you weren't a drinker, yet she still insisted you try some every time you came over
>As she moves to take a seat on the couch adjacent to you, you look around and notice you're grandfather isn't here
"Where's Grandpa?" you ask nonchalantly
>"Ohh, he's off shopping or somewhere. But don't worry, that means we get to have some mare time!"
>She chuckles
>"So how's life goin' down in Ponyville, Twiggles? You catch any stallions yet?" she says with a wink
"A-actually, I wanted to ask you something about that."
>Your grandmother leans in her seat
>"Haha, I never thought the day would come where my little Twiggles would ask me for stallion advice. So, what do you need to know?"

>>29826489
"W-well.."
>You're not sure if your grandmother would approve of you being with and unconventional stallion like Anon right off the bat, so you decide to leave that part out
"There's this stallion I really like back in Ponyville, and I.. I'm not sure how to talk to him."
>Grandma notices you're a little embarrased by this
>"Aww, nothing to worry about, Twiggles. Back in my day, we just grabbed what we wanted, and complimented it! Stallions LOVE a mare who knows what she wants."
"R-really? It's that easy?"
>"Of course! At least, back in my day it was."
>She motions to the unopened beer beside you
>"Drinking that might help boost your confidence a little, too. Just saying."
>You look down at the beer skeptically
>Well, your grandma did know what she was talking about..
>You nod your head
"Thanks, Grandma."
>You spend the rest of the day talking about various things with your Grandmother, and you even get to say hi to your grandfather when he comes home
>But before you know it, it's time to return to Ponyville
>You board the train in the same boring way you did before
>But this time, as you sit alone, you sit with a sense of confidence since you now have a plan
>Anon would be yours by the end of tommorrow!

>>29826499
>Be Anon
>You're at the cafe like you normally are
>You'd hang out at the bar more often if the drunk mares there wouldn't constantly hit on you
>Even here a few would, but not nearly as many as at the bar
>Although it was nice that the ladies were finally coming to you, it could get really annoying really fast
>The cafe was usually empty this early in the morning
>The stallions that you usually talk to aren't here yet
>You and the guys talk about a lot of things, but its normally about which mares are cute and which should piss off and stop harassing them
>But right now, you're alone at a table, sipping some coffee
>As you get up to go talk to the barista out of sheer boredom, the door opens with a jingle, and a familiar purple unicorn walks in
>You swear, she's here almost every day that you are.
>The purple unicorn looks around awkwardly, and notices you standing by the counter
>She stumbles over to you, but you pay no attention to her.
>That is, until she weakly slaps your ass
>"Y-you have a nice ass, Anon."
>She puffs out her chest fluff the best that she can
>The barista looks disgusted, but this purple unicorn's attempt is just so adorable that you can't stop laughing
>You can't even muster up enough anger to be annoyed at her; this is just too cute
>She's obviously a bit drunk, but sober enough to realize that you're laughing at her
>You quickly try and wipe away your tears of laughter with your shirt, but it's too late
>She blushes hard and opens her mouth to say something, but before she can you scoop her up in your arms
>The look on her face implies that this a surely a surprise, but a welcome one
>You walk out of the cafe with this purple nerdhorse in your arms just as your stallion friends are about to walk in
>"Hey, Anon, where are you headed?"
"Going to teach this one a lesson" you say with a wink
>Your friends simply shrug, and walk into the cafe
>"Typical human behavior" they think to themselves

>>29826513
>Sweet Celestia, it worked!
>Anon was all yours!
>You had to make a note to sincerely thank Grandma later-
>Wait a minute.
>Shouldn't you be carrying him?
>You are the mare, after all.
"H-hey, aren't I supposed to be the one carrying you?"
>He looks down to you with a smile
>"Not where I come from, sweetheart."
>You're confused for a second, but that's when it dawns on you:
>Anon was raised in a completely different society
>He's not all yours.
>You're all his.
>And it was really, really turning you on
>Your eyes widen, and he laughs
>"We're gonna have a lot of fun, you and I~"
>After several minutes of walking (and lots of weird looks from the ponies in town) you arrive at what you assume is Anon's house
>He nudges the door open with his foot, and doesn't even pause to turn on the lights in his house
>He just walks you upstairs to his bedroom..

>>29826521
>You gently toss the purple pony onto the bed, and she lands with a small squeak
>Your shirt is a bit damp from her wetness while you carried her
>Before she can react, you pin her down to the bed
>She's definitely a little scared, but at the same time extremely aroused
"Y'know, I never got your name."
>"I'm T-twilight Sparkle.."
>You chuckle
"That's a cute name. Did you know that you're cute?"
>Her blush deepens
>"H-hey, I'm not s-supposed to be cute! I'm a student of C-celestia, I'll have you kno-"
>Before she can finish her sentence, you lean in for a kiss
>Her eyes widen even further, but she doesn't even try to resist as your tongue enters her mouth
>After a solid minute of kissing, you lean off of her, and she sighs with a moan
>"A-anon.."

>>29826530
>You release her from your pinning grasp, and raise an eyebrow as you begin to take off your pants, but she just waits on the bed for you patiently with pure lust written all over her expression
>She knew her place.
>Your pants slide down to your ankles and your boner swings out
>Twilight lets out a little gasp of excitement
>You pin her down to the bed again, and she offers no resistance
>You slide your cock into her moist pussy, eliciting a moan of pleasure from Twilight
>You thrust again and again, and Twilight is loving every second of it
>"Oh Celestia, YES! K-keep going!"
>Her pussy has an iron grip on your dick, and it feels great
"Ohh, you're a breeding horse, I bet!"
>You didn't think her face could get much redder
>"I-I can be for you, Anon~"
>You do like the sound of that.
>So you keep pounding her to the point that her tongue is lolling out since she's so pleasured
>"A-anon, I'm gonna cum!"
>She's lost in ecstasy as you keep thrusting into her
>"P-please cum inside me~!"
>Well, you were never one to deny a lady a request
>After a couple more thrusts, you can't keep it in any longer, and you release your seed inside of her with a grunt
>Her eyes roll upwards as her pussy is filled with your cum
>"Ohh, yes! Yes!"