RGRE: Reversed Gender Roles Equestria

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IT'S SPRING!

IT'S ESTRUS!

>>29842655
I want to fuck Flurry Heart until she is moaning and writhing on the floor in ecstasy while her mom watches

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>>29842677
I suppose in Equestria Spring would be the most 'productive' time of the year if you know what I mean.

>>29842677
>>29842719

Estrus in ponies is dumb. In fact, so is RGRE. That isn't how biology works. Stop having fun.

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>>29842735

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>>29842735
NO

Someone say /ss/
>"AH~ HA~! S-SPIKEY WIKEY, DARLING, UNNNGHA~ T-THIIIS IS HOW A LADY LIKES TO BE MMMMFUCKED."
>"Y-YOUUUU COULD NE-HEEVER UNF, HAA~ H-HOPE TO S-S-SATISFY ME WITH THAT PITIFUL EXC-UUUS-, OH MY, F-FOR A PENIS."

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>>29842735
>stop having fun
just because you are an incredibly gay person who cant enjoy pone fantasies doesnt mean we all cant.

really? That's all it took for someone to fall for it?

>>29842735
Ponies are equine
Equines go into heat
Therefore ponies go into heat
It's not rocket science

>ponys with oral fixation
>pegasus nibbling and sucking at your exposed flesh
>playing with a zebra's big, sexy hoof
>Unicorn silenced with a ballgag calling you her "li'l lollipop"
>pony with lipstick covered lips
>tfw you'll never have a pony' huge insatiable lips on your cock
>tfw you'll never experience ecstasy as the sensation of your dick passing through her slick lips and into her waiting wet pussy consumes you
>tfw you'll never feel the touch of her lips on your groin

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>>29842749

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>>29842771
Yea, but equines are dumb animals, ponies aren't. It's hard to say since humans are the only really intelligent species, but looking around I reckon that the smarter ones forego estrus. It seems to be a mechanism to ensure the survival of progeny that would be completely unecessary and even detremental to an intelligent species such as them. Catch my drift?

>>29842824
Humans also have retarded instinctual quirks and mannerisms, Anon.

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>>29842792
>pony with lipstick covered lips
wew lad

>>29842820
>"OH, YOU DIAMOND, LITTLE TREAT! MORE! MORE! *BURP* OH! E-EXCUSE ME!"

>>29842824
Please, take a trip to Detroit and tell me again about how intelligent species can't be driven by their primal instinct more than their intellect.

>>29842881
"HIT ME! CHOKE ME! AAAHHH! BABIES! BABIES, COME TO MAMA! MAMA NEEDS HER LITTLE SEEDS!"

> Be Anon, hanging out in the Crystal Friendship Castle Playset library in your boxers
> It's your compromise with the "clothes are lewd" thing the ponies have
> It was a little embarrassing at first, but you got used to it eventually
> They'll just have to keep their winking to themselves once it gets colder
> In the mean time, you earn your living drawing portraits of pony nobility
> This is not to say that you are especially good at portraiture, just that there is something of a trend among the nobles to have an "Authentic Human Rendition" made
> Far be it from you to turn down plentiful money, and you only make one once a month
> This, of course, drove the demand up rather high and with it, the price you charge
> The job security is all well and good, but it also means that there was a great deal of contention before the Princess of Bureaucracy stepped in and made a schedule
> Understandingly, there were those who wish to cut in line, offering bribes, ambushing you outside of your apartment, that sort of thing
> It got to be such a hassle that you ultimately moved into the castle of a certain purple princess
> It helps that the library is extensive, you have always liked to read
> "Huh."
> Looks like your reading buddy has something she wants to share
"Yes?"
> Twilight's voice is slightly muffled by the book hovering in front of her face
> "It says here, that, uh, 'Minotaur penises vary in length and girth, both before and after erection, sometimes irrespective of it's previous state.' Is this true for humans too?"
> You are pretty sure the question isn't entirely academic, but there probably isn't any harm in answering it
"Yup."
> You aren't the most helpful of research subjects
> "And in your, ah, personal experience?"
> You look up from your book
> Despite her efforts to hide behind the book, you can see her blushing
> To be fair, you aren't exactly comfortable with the question yourself
"I'd rather not say."

>>29842920
It is my turn to go where I have fallen asleep!

>>29842916
> She lowers the book, embarrassment shifting into concern
> "Is that why you insist on boxers? Some sort of size-based insecurity?"
> You frown
"There's also the whole modesty thing, I know I told you about that."
> She sets the book down, staring straight into your eyes
> "I understand that, but you are already becoming desensitized to casual nudity. Anon, you don't have to worry about having a penis smaller than the average stallion's. When it comes to mares, the size doesn't matter, we're just happy to see a dick."
(Just an idea that has been rolling around in my head.)

>>29842881
Yea, but primal instict is about perpetuating the species, which you will note niggers do quite well if you look at the birth rates. They breed like rabbits. Having a few days a year to get knocked up is way less advantageous than a few days each month.

Besides, we are talking about physiological differences as much as behavioral ones. You can take the nigger out of Africa, but you can't take the Africa out of the nigger. If, however, you put the nigger in an environment more conducive to the development of intelligent species for a good long time, he develops different traits from his ancestor. But even that analogy is bad, because comparing horses and our little ponies is like comparing humans and our ancient relatives.

>>29842916
>>29842920
>>29842931
Gonna be honest senpai, I'd get irritated real quick with that line of questioning and conversation.

>>29842940
Well , Buddhism doesnt allow monks to touch women , so maybe the marriage between a monk and a man is fine ???

>>29842934
>>29842881
Fuck off back to /pol/, thanks. This kind of autistic shit is why writers are rare.

>>29842949
>Anon and munk stallion
D-don't be stupid! Beside, anon is a man, he can't bear a child

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>>29842978
>can't bear a child
That is not a problem, all he need to do is drink from the Spring of Pregnancy.

>>29842983
wut.

>>29842990
HE SAID THAT IS NOT A PROBLEM, ALL HE NEED TO DO IS DRINK FROM THE SPRING OF PREGNANCY

>>29842973
Because this is 4chan? I don't think that's an issue on 4chan. Writers are rare because writting is hard, most need inspiration beyond the broad topic of a general, most generals suck and are very niche anyway, and this place has a habit of not sucking people's dicks all the time which is actually great in most cases, but very bad when you want people to put their dicks out there for you to suck on. You all tend to drive away writers with autistic outbursts against people who don't like the things you like more than over politics or sociology or biology anyway.

How many blacks browse this shit anyway, much less contribute to it? You shouldn't be such a puss. A little bit of on topic debate never hurt any thread.

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>>29843000

>>29843000
>SPRING OF PREGNANCY
Nnnnnnnnnoooooooooo

>>29843022
>Writing is hard
Debatable. I disagree but whatever.
>Most need inspiration beyond the broad topic of a general
Have you seen the number of prompts and ideas people post? C'mon.
>Place has a habit of not sucking people's dicks all the time
What? Any new/old writers are praised and encouraged unless their writing is legitimately shit (excluding the occasional autistic screeching).
>You all tend to drive away writers with autistic outbursts against people who don't like the things you like more than over politics or sociology or biology anyway.
I'll agree with you on that, buuuut...
>On-topic debate
Is this bait? On-topic to an off-topic post doesn't count, buddy.

>>29842949
That is a fucking retarded line of thinking.

Many centuries ago, a great evil was sealed beneath Canterlot Mountain. It took representatives from each of the major races of Equestria to do it, and after the hard-fought battle, they set up alarms tied to their bloodlines so they and their descendants would know quickly if the evil ever showed signs of breaking free from its imprisonment.

Cue Anon, in present day RGRE.
Hiking around the Canterlot foothills, he stumbles across a nearly completely hidden cave, overgrown by plant life and clearly forgotten. Within is a strange structure, one so interesting he simply must get a closer look… until Pinkie Pie shoots up out of his pocket, startling him and causing him to demolish the structure entirely through improbable happenstance and luck.

Beneath the structure, Anon finds a passage deeper into the mountain. Compelled to continue exploring (Pinkie shouting "Do it, faggot!"), he discovers a misshapen form composed of a mish-mash of numerous animal parts, curled into a ball, softly slumbering.

Anon, having realized he's totally fucked up and landed himself into some bastardized shounen anime trope, tries to nope the fuck out before it's too late, but his hasty exit only serves to wake up the obvious super powerful ancient entity that used to be taking a nice nap in the center of the room.

The form uncurls, stretching its limbs and yawning with a particularly feminine tone to its voice. It is, of course, the dreaded Space Pirate/Chaos Entity Eris, and she's very attractive to Anon- I mean, attracted to Anon- wait, that's not right- grateful to Anon for freeing her from her long torment. Or possibly all three, and she intends to show him just how "grateful" she is.

Meanwhile, the descendants of those who sealed her so long ago have felt the disturbance and panicked, dropping everything to get to Equestria as quickly as possible.

Anon's life is about to go full Tenchi Muyo, and he never got past the Kagato arc. Ryoko is best girl, anyway.

>>29843022
You know, you say that, but tell me. How many of your shit generals, your obviously butthurt over dying on you, are left?

>>29843312
You use green to denominate prompts buddy, otherwise....its something? Not entirely RGRE, but I think it could go somewhere here, I guess.

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>>29843313

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>>29842655

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>>29842973
>complaining about autism
>on 4chan
>on its pony board

>>29843312
>Be Anon in Animuquestria
>You are a dudette from some sort of earth place but you are now in Equestria for some sort of poorly-explained reason.
>You are the little boy here because gender roles are all backwards
>But you don't give a shit about that because you're poking around under Celestia's housetain
>There's got to be some sort of cool shit down here.
>Pinkie is with you because she's your sidekick or something.
>She's carrying lunch and stuff for the two of you so you're not going to tell her she can't come.
>Anyway it's all crystally and miney down here.
>The diggy hole kind of mine, not the explodey when you step on it kind.
>Ponies didn't get that second kind of mine until you taught them about them, and being new they are not in dusty old places like this.
>They're out in pony-cambodia blowing legs off the unlucky.
>You and pinkie have just gone down another rickety old ladder when you come across something cooler than the rest of the mine so far.
>It's a ominous stone doorway with loads of runes on it.
>This likely means it's got treasure behind it.
>So you and Pinkie swing your picks and smash it open.
>There is indeed neat stuff inside, all sorts of jewelry, wands, arks and other enchanted looking stuff.
>And in the middle of the room is a strange statue.
>It's a mishmash of all sorts of animal parts on one being, with text on the plinth reading 'Discord'.
>Fucken Jackpot!
>The two of you end up splitting the treasure between you, selling and donating the stuff neither of you has a use for.
>Like the statue, which you give to the city statue gallery because you don't have anywhere to put it.

>>29843312
>>29843473
>mfw he did it

>>29843473
>After the big treasure haul things go back to sort of normal for a while
>Pinkie goes back to Ponyville citing plot-related reasons
>You stay in Canterlot in the Human Embassy, which as the only human defaults to being yours to stay in for free.
>After a few months of fucking around you start getting odd visitors.
>Like that Prince Sashimi of the Grifons.
>His older brother Prince Aleka who came along a week or so after Sashimi first showed up.
>And that red-scaled Siren guy, Washout.
>All of who have been asking about the adventuring you've done recently.
>They've been trying to find some kind of carbonite sarcophogus by the sound of it.
>You told them that you didn't find anything like that, and you wouldn't even know what carbonite looks like to start with.
>But you certainly didn't find any mummies down in the mines.
>They've decided to stay in Canterlot and keep coming by to see you.
>You really get the feeling that there's more to this than they're telling you.

>>29843473
huh

durnk, its been a while since you've written some madness lately

>>29843537
What you call madness, I call amazing.

aww I just made myself sad by reminding me of Magical Boy Anonymous.

>>29842655
Is OP's pic supposed to be reversed gender roles? I've met more girls than guys that do that irl.

>>29842824
>implying intelligence and estrus existing together is impossible

I honestly cannot understand why you think being intelligent eliminates certain traits...just cuz.
Estrus is actually incredibly beneficial to the intelligent - the higher your IQ the least likely you are to have children. The more developed a country, the lower the birthrates. An estrus cycle in an intelligent species would prevent the current problem of smart people having no or few kids compared to very dumb or poor people who tend to have a ton of kids. In fact, an estrus cycle might be why Equestrian is such a utopia, ignoring the outside threats. The ponies themselves live in relative harmony, probably because all the smart and kind ponies actually had kids too.

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>>29842735

Actually, that's exactly how biology works.
Humans have a constant reproductive cycle because we live in a highly competitive environment where a high reproduction rate ensured our survival and rise in the food chain.

An environment like Equestria where anything outside the Everfree Forest has nothing to fear (with the exception of the occasional villain) a more restrained reproductive cycle makes perfect sense from a biological standpoint.

>>29842824
Humans are intelligent and advanced.
We all still want to fuck and be fucked like the rest of the dirty animals. In fact, we're even worse, more than half of women have rape fantasies for Christ's sake.

We have 120+ IQ girls desperately begging for cock, by your logic that is impossible. We have 120+ IQ lonely virgin NEETs who want nothing more than to hold hands with someone, by your logic this should also be impossible.

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>>29842973
If your writers stop writing because of a few post they dislike, then your writers are fucking shit and need to grow some damn balls. This is fucking 4chan.

>>29843719
Especially since ponies live a very cyclical life if you have noticed. Everyone has their set routines. Seasons and weather are planned out in advance. Estrus would fit perfectly into the current universe, there would be a specific time for it, probably have some sort of festivals or other cultural things about it. In the following months there'd be Baby Month when all the estrus babies are born.
This is of course off-show because its a little kids show designed to sell merch, not make parents explain sex and being horny.

>>29842792
>pony with lipstick covered lips
Why live?

Hey, new writefag checking in. Hopefully I didn't mess up the tripcode

I've written a Anon/Gilda short story, to test the waters. Let me know what you think/critique.

> Feeling the soft grass beneath your paws, you silently move through the dusky woods of the Everfree forest.
> The clock must have passed ten on this still warm summer evening. The sun has just set an hour ago, but there’s still a faint light even in the woody gloom.
> Having visited Rainbow earlier in the day, you figured you’d take a detour through the greens to snatch up a rabbit or maybe even a small boar before you return to Griffonstone.
> You shut your beak in a small clicking noise, more to break the monotony of the surrounding foliage, than for a specific purpose.
> Walking past the trees, you can hear the sounds of life, bird chirpings and squirrel rustling, dim to a low as you move past, only to pick up again behind you as you pass.
> The forest is bountiful with life, you just have to know where to lo-
> The sharp snapping sound of a branch being thread on echoes through the woods.
> You stop dead in your tracks. Not moving a muscle, you scan your surroundings, sniffing the air, listening for new clues on what caused the sound.
> The wind is blowing from your right side, and the sound emanated from the left.
> You’re upwind, you muse. You won’t be able to smell whatever it is that made the sound.
> Waiting in stock still anticipation, five minutes pass in silence. The noises of the forest has grown silent as well, you notice.
> Bracing your hind legs for a frantic jump in case something charges you, you spot it.

> A tall biped creature begins moving. It’s only because of its movement that you can see it. Its body is covered in deep-green clothing, with pieces of coarse leather strapped to it here and there. Its face is painted in a mix of hazel brown and leaf green.
> Or, rather, him.
> Anonymous, the “humon”.

>>29843798
> You didn’t get to meet the guy when you visited Ponyville.
> You’ve hear Rainbow mention him, a tall creature, with physique like a minotaur. Or, similar to a minotaur. You’ve certainly never met a minotaur this silent.
> As he begins moving further into the forest, you can see more details on his equipment.
> A large broad spear is held firmly in his hands, with another two smaller ones lodged in a large quiver across his back. A knife sits comfortably in a sheath at his sides.
> Sweet Celestia, that knife is the length of one of your front legs…
That’s a ‘noife, son.
> A rugged looking knapsack hangs from the side of the quiver, with another smaller one on his hip, next to the knife.
> He hasn’t spotted you, either that, or he’s blatantly ignoring you.
> Despite his impressive size, he moves effortlessly through the underbrush.
> Waiting for him to get a good deal ahead of you, you stalk in behind him, your curiosity getting the better of you.
> As the two of you move through the forest, you wonder what kind of prey he’s hunting. Rainbow did mention that he ate meat, but not what kind. Glancing at the large spear ahead of you, you conclude that he’s not here for the fishing ponds…
> You don’t know what parts of you that make you follow in his footsteps. Could be curiosity, could be the desire to know how this stranger hunts. Could be some spec of griffon stubbornness about how it’s the hens that bring home the game, and not the cocks.
> Silly cocks…
> All of the sudden, Anonymous stops. You do as well.
> Leaning down to your left, you spot a large stag standing some forty feet from you.
> It’s blissfully unaware of both you and Anonymous. You’re upwind again. You can smell the stag, and the faint smell of sweat from the humon.
> Surely, he isn’t goi-…

>>29843802
> Anonymous crouches down on his hunches, and places his long spear in the moss besides him. Fishing forward one of the smaller spears on his back, he retrieves what look like a long string of leather from the bag on his hip.
> He places one end of the leather strap around the base of the digits on his hand, the other end in a nook on the end of the spear from the quiver.
> What is he doing, you ponder. He can’t fight a stag that size.
> Silently, he rises up again, curling his digits around the spear.
> The stag looks up, scanning the surrounding area. Anonymous, on his part, is still again. When the beast continues grazing, he hefts the spear up near his head, almost as if he wants to throw it.
> The realization hits you as the fibers and tendons of Anonymous’ arm flex and throw the spear at mindboggling speed. You didn’t even see it fly, before it struck the stag in the side. A meaty “thunk” sounds through the woods, before a pained cry from the animal is
> The stag sensing the danger and the hurting in its side begins fleeing.
> Grabbing his spear again, Anonymous takes the chase, forgetting everything about staying silent. You scramble to catch up to the humon, his long legs giving him an impressive speed.
> You can smell it, the blood covering the leaves you brush past. He must have hit near an artery or something.
> You’ve never seen anyone hunting like this. It’s exhilarating. The chase, the anticipation, the strength of wills put against one another. It’s unlike anything you’ve ever experienced.
> The staggered breathing of the wounded stag is a clear indication that this short chase is nearing its end.
> You come up to a small clearing in the woods. The stag, having realized the meaningless aspect of trying to flee, squares up in a final stand against the predator. The spear is stilled attached firmly in its side, paining its movements and breathing.

>>29843803
> Seeing the stag has given up trying to escape, Anonymous readies his broad spear in his arms.
> Rearing up, the stag begins running at him in a last-ditch attempt to kill its adversary.
> Anonymous, on his part, places the end of his spear firmly in the ground, sitting a leg on it. Leaning forward, he points the pointy end towards the charging animal, bracing for the inevitable collision.
> Speechlessly, you watch from the side as the stag reaches the spear, impaling itself upon the metal head. The body struggles for a moment, before accepting its fate, and the beast collapses on its side.
> He doesn’t waste any time celebrating the results of his efforts. Anonymous immediately withdraw the spear from the chest of the stag, drying of the tip in the long grass.
> He reaches back into the bag on his side, producing a long piece of rope. Carefully, he begins tying the legs of the stag together in two parts, before tying the two ends of the rope into a rough harness.
> Before adorning the newly made harness, he picks up his weapons, placing the small spear back in its quiver, and the larger spear in a holster on the side of the quiver.
> He tightens the ends of the harness against his broad chest, and begins dragging the corpse back the way he came.
> The same direction you are currently sitting in…
> As silently as you can, you scramble to get out of the way of this humon. He’s clearly on a whole other level of hunting than you are. You’d need at least three more griffons to take down a deer that size.
> Grunting, Anonymous continues along the path the three of you made in your chase.
> Following behind, you begin to think.
> A guy of that size probably weigh in the range of 180 pounds. That’s ~84 kg for you non-capitalists.

>>29843805
> How does he move so silently, you wonder. He must have covered his hind legs in some sort of cloth. Perhaps if he knows Rainbow, he might know the purple egghead as well. Maybe she enchanted some of his equipment…
> With these thought-experiments in your head, you mindlessly snap your beak deep in ponder.
> Anonymous stops in his tracks. Oh drat, he heard that, you realize.
> Quickly untying the ropes across himself, he quickly leap into the foliage on his left.
> You lose sight of him immediately.
> Shit shit shit…
> You throw yourself down on the forest floor, to minimize your profile
> This is not good. You’ve got a thinking predator sneaking around the area. It’s armed with deadly weapons. It’s aware of your presence, but not where you are…
> Quickly mulling over your options, you quickly sort out the most obvious. You can’t fly away. The foliage is too thick, and the tree tops blocks the skies. You can’t run from him, you only barely managed to keep up with him on the chase.
> Perhaps you could f-fight him?
> Yea girl, no chance.
> He’s larger than you, coupled with the further reach from his spears. Even if you managed to close the distance between the two of you, he’s still got that knife.
> Not a sound is heard in the woods.
> That is, until a whizzing sound flies past you before a “thunk” is heard. Instinctively, you look in the direction it flew. One of his spears, still dangling, is lodged firmly in the trunk of a large oak.
> Wait a minute, if the spear flew that way… That means tha-…
> Before you can react, a large burly hand snap out of the bush besides you, closing its digits around your beak. Frantically trying to escape, you flail your claws in the direction of the arm.
> Your claws only scratch the hard leather surface of the bracelets covering the arm.

>>29843809
> Another arm shoots out, clamping your two front legs together. Hefting you up, the two arms throw you on your side, effortlessly. A knee is placed atop of your claws, immobilizing them, while the digits retract, unsheathing the knife at his belt.
> Your efforts stops dead cold as the feeling of the metal blade is pressed against your esophagus.
> The two of you sit there for a few moments, before he speaks.
> His deep baritone voice revels no emotions, only a calculated usage of precious air.
> “Nod if you understand me,” he says.
> You nod feverishly, or as frantic as the knife permits.
> Sighing, and displaying what can only be obvious annoyance, he continues
> “Why did you follow me?” he asks, removing his digits from your beak.
“I-I’ve never seen a humon hunt before,” you stammer.
> “It’s “human”, birdbrain, and I’m not buying it” he corrects. You don’t dare make a huff in indignation.
> “Do you know Twilight Sparkle, purple pony with wings and horn, the whole package?” he continues, awaiting your response.
> Again, you nod, sensing an escape from this.
> “Great,” he says. “Then you can explain to her why you were following me.”
> Drat.
> “Great, and seeing how you’ve got some explaining to do, you might as well take your fair share of the workload back.” He smiles a hideous smile, revealing rows of shimmering white teeth, with the occasional canine.
> Double drat.


That's it, anons. Let me know what you think I could correct/do better another time.

Pastebin is here: https://pastebin.com/abk5qXPB

>>29843022
>How many blacks browse this shit anyway, much less contribute to it?
probably none tBh

>>29843719
That's retarded, purple fag. There was a pre-Equestria horse land, you know. We had a whole episode about how life was harsh and unforgiving and drove the ponies into conflict. A restrained reproductive cycle doesn't make sense for any creature unless they are incapable of rearing children without it.

>>29843755
That's dumb too. So because the wage slave has a very planned-out life, with a consistent daily routine, vacations laid out months in advance, and a long-term plan to climb the ladder at work, it makes sense that his reproductive cycle should be severely limited?

I think you are missing the point here though: stop having fun. I get it, estrus is a hoot, and everybody loves the idea mares craving dick uncontrollably, and you like the idea of having some sort of Easter like holiday built around ponies fucking. That's not how it would work though. Stop having fun.

>>29843812
M o a r
o
a
r

>>29843812
http://vocaroo.com/i/s16VmvDHAeK3

>>29843812
That was pretty good, it actually felt tense & like anon was a serious predator.

>>29843812
good stuff

>>29843833
I don't get it. This guy posted "stop having fun" like 80 times and you're all still arguing with him. He's not even trying.

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>>29842677
Know the warning signs.

>>29843734
>wah wah wah why won't people provide a service for free in an environment they don't enjoy being in abloo hoo hoo I'll just call them all pieces of shit WHY ARE THEY ALL LEAVING
This is why we can't have nice things.

>>29844046
Get lost bitchfag, your just mad we are still here. If you want to suck off a useless namefag, go to Fingerbang.

>>29844021
Meh, its hard to tell if he is just trolling or he's being serious. There are some retards that think like this>>29844046

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>>29844118
Oh christ, the discordfag's back.

>>29843833
>life was hard so restrained reproduction doesn't make sense

Tell that to the thousands of species which live in the wild and have restrained reproduction

>>29843833
The wage slave's life is a personal one, not the same for everyone. Equestria as an entire world is incredibly tightly run, everyone's lives follow these cycles while unique in their personal choices.

>>29844046
I'm not whining about it, I don't care if they go or stay. I'm just saying, if periodic racist posts scare them off then what are they doing on 4chan or mlp in general? This site as a whole is toxic as fuck, this board is especially toxic and fucked up.

I think it's silly that such small things would make them leave, Im not saying they dont have a right to or that I care about it.

>>29843812
Is gud. Want more.

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>>29842940
Well then quit being a bitch and whip it out.

>>29843719
I wonder how many people here think estrus is a thing only horses have. The estrous cycle is a lot more common in species of the mammalian class than the menstrual cycle, and there are plenty of animals who can bear offspring all year round, including horses given the right conditions.

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>>29844023
A mare's tongue will easily dominate your own. Losing the kissing match is seen as a sign of submission and she will fuck you then and there.

>>29843812
moar catbutt pls

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>>29842792
>playing with a zebra's big, sexy hoof
That's right, ponies, even your HOOVES are too small for these humies! STRIPED!

>>29844428
>"Anon is devoted to only me. I'm glad I found him in the Everfree."

>>29844428
>>29844451

Shitposting level legendary.

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>>29844428

>>29843755
That's kinda cute to think about, actually. An estrus festival.

>>29843812
Hey, that's pretty good. Now lemme share mine. https://pastebin.com/TCcd1EUz

>You both take off from the ground flying towards Ponyville.
>”What are these Gods of yours like Gilda?” Fluttershy asks cruising alongside you out of the forest.
>Well that’s not like opening a can of worms only to find snakes.
>Better to start with the family friendly stuff first at least.
>The old ways tend to gross out other races at least.
“To start most of the Gods started out like any other griffon, born from an egg to either exceptional parents or just your normal average clutch.”
>”You mean like how Twilight turned into an alicorn?”
“I don’t know all the lore, but I think that’s how it went. The first two to do so are pretty much the founders of my people’s way of life really.”
>”What are their names then? Maybe we can ask them for the zap root for Anon!” Fluttershy says in excitement. It is a shame you have to poke a hole in Fluttershy’s bubble.
“Nido might let us for just a kiss or some lost knowledge no one else knows, I swear he is the reason all the cocks back home always knew everything that happened back home.”
>”Colts aren’t much better a-actually, y-you don’t think they share information do you?” Fluttershy asks nibbling at her lip.
“Would not surprise me in the least, but at least our cocks have a reason to be a bunch of doddering roosters, they had supernatural myths to take inspiration from, your princesses just collect colts like trophies.”
>”H-hey that’s not really fair, besides a kiss doesn’t sound too terrible…”
>Oh, oh sweet summer child.
>You can’t help it, but you let out a chirp of laughter at Fluttershy which causes her to hover in place as you have to land to catch your breath.

>>29844786
>”I-I don’t see what’s so funny, it sounds easy enough!”
“That’s all well and good, but you don’t know about Nido’s wife, Grifga.”
>Fluttershy simply looks at you with a frown across her face, “What’s so terrible about her then?”
“Fluttershy she’s our matron of Fate, Battle and Death.”
>”Oh my.”
“That’s actually a funny story about how she became the Goddess of Fate, she used to be just in charge of Battle and Death.”
>Adjusting yourself on your cloud you let your claws play amongst the clouds as you retell the story. Fluttershy looks interested enough so you continue your tale.
“The Fates, of which there are three, are named Dru, Divarend, and Dlusk each representing the past, present and future respectively. Now the three other hens were trying to woo Nido away from Grifga by offering him one of his greatest weaknesses, knowledge.”
>”Wh-what happened to them?”
>Sunlight glints of your beak as you smile widely, “There /is/ a reason why she’s called the Battle Matron you know.”
>”She killed them!?”
>Shaking your head you wave off the accusation.
“Of course not, you see Nido was tempted by the three who each had a unique power, one to see the past, another to see the present and the last was able to see into the future like I mentioned before. Each wanted Nido to herself, but failed to account for Grifga when she arrived.”
>”So, what did Grifga do to them then?” Fluttershy asks looking torn between being scared for the Fates to interested in what happened next.

>>29844788

>Flicking your wings as you let them stretch from flying you chuckle.
“Grifga beat each one till they were ready to molt, she was a feather away from ending them for good, but she found their talents useful and bound them to her through rune and blood. That’s how she earned the title of Fate Seer and then there was some legends that talked about how those brave enough to kiss Nido and live after Grifga’s wrath earned a wish. That started a bunch of deaths that just lead to a few clans dying out as a result.”
>Strange Fluttershy looks awfully pale all of a sudden, “A-are all your Gods this, this mean?”
>Staring at Fluttershy you click your beak before motioning with your head to town.
>”O-oh, right.” Spreading her wings Fluttershy takes off as you follow after her still thinking back to what Fluttershy said.
>Mean?
>That was just what any right thinking queen would do against someone trying to poach her tom!
>Ponies have to have something similar to make sure their colts stick with them right?
>It’s not like they just let those nice, juicy, thick spu-
>Working the kinks out of your wings you grumble to yourself
>Stupid stallions and their stupid sexy dicks...

>>29844791

>”I-is there maybe a God of Animals? O-or even one about plants, plants are nice, they don’t try to eat you, mostly I mean.” You catch from ahead of you as the words tumble past.
“Relax Fluttershy not all are that mean, some are actually just harmless or a bit eccentric, like the couple of mountain and ocean.”
>The outskirts of Ponyville are starting to come into view now as you both glide down.
>”That’s an odd couple to have together isn’t it? Are they just griffons made of water and stone then?”
“Only their wings are actually and-” Shaking your head you land on the dirt road leading into town. “Hang on, let’s get the others first. I’ll get Rainbow and what’s the orange colored one called again?”
>”Applejack, Gilda please you know her name.”
“Looks it’s not my fault that she just blends in the background so well!”
>”Gilda, Applejack’s orange, how do you not notice that?”
>Fluffing up your crest to defend yourself you let out a puff of air.
“Can we just get on with it already? You go get the ones in town I’ll get the others.”
>Sighing Fluttershy nods before taking off towards the center of town while you head off towards the clouds.

>>29844798

>Collecting Rainbow was easy enough and it only took the both of you to simply carry Applejack to Twilight’s castle for the meeting.
>Glad to know some things never change with your old friend.
>The cowpony however is in a mood from the mare handling that you both did to her.
>Meh.
>Not like you’re that invested in her to be honest.
>”...and so Gilda has brought us together so we can try to help Anon.”
>Oh, the princess of books is done rambling, that’s good.
>Why’s everyone looking at you?
>It takes Fluttershy clearing her throat to bring you back to life.
“Ah! Right, well uh, from the looks of it Zecora said we need an herb from Mt. Halla, Fluttershy insists that we need as much as we can get so yeah. That’s pretty much it.”
>Twilight fumes as she stomps a hoof on her seat, “That’s what I just said!”
>”Yeah, but you tend talk a lot with twenty something syllables most the time Twilight.” Rainbow said leaning back in her seat hooves behind her head.
>”Well excuse me for trying to broaden your vocabulary.” Twilight mumbled to herself before looking over at you. “Gilda do you have any experience you can share about Mt. Halla? I’ve read a few stories about mentioning it, but they are rather vague.”
“It’s not something we like to advertise to other races to be honest.”
>”Oh well I wouldn’t want to get you in trouble.” Twilight said looks down with her ears splayed back.
“All I can really tell are tales that involve the Gods that live there really. Matter of fact trying to lead any non flier is risky as it is…” Shifting in your seat your tail twitches around your front letting you sink your claws into the tuft cleaning it. “Most of the people that live there are of the old crowd if you catch my drift.”

>>29844801
>”Darling whatever do you mean by that?” Rarity asked looking confused, “I would think they’d enjoy some modernization on that mountain of theirs.”
>”What Ah think she means is that it's full of a buncha them non-unity types that don’t like other folks.” Applejack said crossing her forelegs together as she gives a stink eye. “Did Ah hit it on the head there?”
>Wincing you shrug waving a wing back and forth.
“I mean, they're not racists, just a lot of them have experience that tells them stuff that pretty much says they are right.”
>”But that was thousands of years ago!” Twilight argued back leaning on her big table of friendship wings flaring out in outrage, “Why would they hold onto such terrible beliefs?”
>”Yeah, it might have something to do with them living on that mountain forever ago Twilight.” Rainbow said back you up.
>You knew it was a good idea to share stories of your people with Rainbow back at flight camp.
>Even if the camp had the /stupidest/ of songs.
>”Well in that case consider me on the team, I’m going to be having a strong word with your princess about having such a terrible mindset like that.” Twilight said looking determined.
>The image of the little chubby nerd trying to argue with Grifga has you trying so hard to hold in the laugh.
>”What?” Twilight asked looking at you insulted.
>Fluttershy is shaking her head using her wing to mime cutting it off.
“No offense, well I’d be lying, but Twilight, Grifga is our people’s Battle Matron, she who bound the Fates, slaughtered the King of Labyrinthia when he raided our nests for our eggs, you trying to ponify her is just…” You hold a talon up to your beak trying to stop the laughter, you are trying to make friends with these ponies after all can’t laugh at their stupidity.

>>29844808
>Twilight frowns at you with a stubborn look in her eyes as she crosses her forelegs as she looks away, “I still want to be on the team, who knows maybe it’ll open new relations between Equestria and Gryphonia.”
“Tch, do what you want, just don’t go crying to me if Grifga rends your wings off your back.”
>At the silence you crack open an eye to see the whole room sans Rainbow staring at you in shock.
“What? Grifga plays for keeps when it comes to her home and household.”
>”Grifga sounds an awful lot like a bully to me.” Pinkie said balancing a set of cards atop each other.
>These ponies.
“Ugh, aren’t you ponies supposed to be all smiles and understanding? Can we just say it’s a griffon thing and leave it at that?”
>The girls all murmur amongst each other before Rarity speaks up, “It’s fine I suppose, I’d just hope they don’t try to cause us trouble when we go to visit, though Darlings I think we’ve forgotten something.”
>”What’s that Sugarcube?”
>”Who is going to look after Anon while we’re gone?”
>Oh Grifga’s saggy crow’s feet.
>You completely forgot about that!
>”Oh! OH! I could stay with Anon!” Pinkie exclaims bouncing up and down in her seat.
>No.
>You can already see it now.
>The poor rooster all alone and needing healing, the nurse outfit Pinkie would wear to seduce your poor cock…
>”Hey this is a really neat idea Gilda!”
>GAH!
>Shaking your head you look to Pinkie grinning absentmindedly at you, just like at the party.
>No, no.
>Don’t let her get in your head Gilda, that’s how she won last time.

World building! Pony Antics! Tales of Caution! What next? Who knows I'm tired and should sleep more. Hope this appeased those catbird enthusiasts out there!

>>29842792
My dick can't take it.

>>29842655
Not someone who follows this thread, just curious if anyone knows the artist for the picture in OP.
I like their work.

>>29844893
His name is shoutingisfun, if you want to find him then he not on this 4chan or any drawing thread.

Just go mlpg.co and then /art/

>>29844907
Also derpibooru.

>>29843812
Finally, an Anon that actually hunts. I am interest.

>>29844907
>>29844944
Thanks

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>>29844814
>>29843812
The world can always use more catbird

>>29844907
shout is kill

Bonobo

>>29845006
Saw Bonobo a few weeks ago. Good shit, great music.

>>29843805
You use 'on his part' a little too much.

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>>29843812
NOW TAKE HER VIRGINITY WHILE SHE'S HELPLESS

>>29843921
>>29843994
>>29844019
>>29844144
>>29844179
>>29844945
>>29845001

Thanks for the words of encouragement, anons! I'll try and write some more tonight, and post tomorrow.

>>29845090
Thanks for pointing that out, Anon. I'll keep an eye of for that. Also rewrote it in the pastebin

>>29843937
Thank... you?

>>29844786
Senpai noticed!

>Ponies think that Anon is super lewd in all his clothing
>Convinces him to go around in shorts and spend the entire day outside (to show Ponyville that he isn't, in fact, a slut who wears lingerie all day)
>Ponies are horrified when they find out that he's become sunburned

>>29845342
kek

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>>29845342
>word gets back to Celestia

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>>29845374
>Celestia herself descends from Canterlot to wrap him gently in her wings and apologize

>>29845380
Then she loses it and in her mad frenzy nukes the sun. Equestria is plunged into eternal darkness.

>>29845374
>Luna is smuggest horse

>"The gentle caress of moonlight upon your skin shall never harm you, fair Anonymous."

>>29845342
>Ponies horrified that Anon begins shedding skin and healing
>Ponies don't naturally regrow skin under their coats like this, relying on their innate magic to renew and replace.

>>29845451
>"I told ya he was a reptilian! We even already knew he was an alien, why was him being a snake man beyond consideration?!"

>>29845493
>I'll buy it when he licks his eyeballs, this is just like griffons molting or something"

>>29845493
>Applejack keeps claiming she sees Anon in the apple orchard, leaving apple-circles
>Accuses him of abducting her cows

>>29845505
>Twilight watches as you peel off skin.
>She's just... Watching.
>You watch as her tail wags eagerly as you peel off each piece.
"Do... Do you want some?"
>You say holding out a large piece of skin.
>Her eyes go wide and she holds out her hooves noding.
>You place it in her hooves.
>She looks at the skin her face in awe.
>"I-I can have this?" She ask hope in her eyes.
"Uh, sure?"
>She lets out happy horse noises before galloping off the skin in her magic.
>You go to peel off more but you notice a shadow caused by something behind you.
>You turn around and find Luna.
>"May... May we have some of thy skin Anonymous?"

>>29845523
"It's called "going on a date", Appplejack."

>Anon hears about Equestria's cows
>He asks Applejack about getting some milk and meat

>>29845556
>When griffons molt, they give their old feathers to loved ones
>By giving out bits of dead skin to anypony who asks, Anon is basically creating a herd

>>29844814
thank you Comfy, this is so good

>>29845560
>You cuddle Applejack closer, holding her to your bare chest.
>It had been a lot of trouble for the girls to convince you to start going around naked, and in the end you compromised and basically stripped down to your shorts.
>"A-Anawn..."
>You shush her and stroke her mane, working your fingers through her thick, blond hair.
>It's just as soft as a human's, and it smells just as sweet.
"I know."
>Applejack weakly paws at you and looks around nervously.
>"No, y'all don't understand!"
"Shhh..."
>You move from running your fingers through her mane to rubbing her cheek, and you can't help but smile when she raises her chin up for you to scratch.
>Her eyes are closed and a blush is erupting on her face, and you can feel one of her hind legs kicking against your lap.
"It's just us, Applejack."
>She opens her eyes and looks at you with heavily-lidded eyes.
"I know we had some misunderstandings about the cows and the apple-circles, but we can put that all behind us."
>" T'aint proper," she croaks, trying and failing to tear her eyes away from yours, "Temptin' a hard-workin' mare like me..."
>You smile and shake your head.
"It's not 'tempting' if we actually go through with it."
>Applejack whimpers and shakes her head 'no'.
>"N-Not till yah got a r-ring..."
>She twitches and twists just a little bit as you slowly bring your face closer to her's.
>She wants to stay, but at the same time she wants to leave.
>You had no idea that a simple farmpony had such hidden depths.
>You just smile and cup her cheek, just to make sure she can't turn away from you.
"That can come later."
>Her eyes flutter shut as you make your final approach, and your's begin to follow suit.
>You can feel her hot breath on your face, and you unconsciously begin to synchronize your breathing; she exhales, and you inhale. She inhales, and you exhale.

>>29845643
>>"Applejack? Ah tho- Applejack!"
>You and Applejack's eyes snap open and you stare at each other in surprise.
>Applejack scrambles to get off of you, pushing your arms away without any of the delicacy she normally reserved for stallions.
>Standing in between two trees is none other than Applejack's little sister, Apple Bloom.
>She looks outraged in the way that only small children can.
>"A-Apple Bloom?! Ah thought Ah told you-"
>>"Y'all said you were callin' Anon for soup!"
>Applejack does an unhappy little horse dance and groans miserably.
>"Ah was!"
>Apple Bloom stomps her hoofs angrily.
>>"I'm tellin' Granny!"
>"No, don't!"
>Apple Bloom rushes out of the orchard, and Applejack sprints off after her.
>Dinner was awkward that night; Big Mac called you a slut, and Granny said that you had something called "Foal-sirin' hips".
>Today was a "Apples is complicated" kind of day.

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>>29844814
nurse poka

>>29844814
Very nice to see this continue

>>29843819
I know atleast one does

>>29845648
>Big Mac called you a slut, and Granny said that you had something called "Foal-sirin' hips"


Top Kek

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>>29845648
>>Dinner was awkward that night; Big Mac called you a slut, and Granny said that you had something called "Foal-sirin' hips".
Apple family most entertaining family

>>29845657
>"Anon, quick! I have to blow you! It's the only cure!"
"Wh-wha?"
>"Let me suck on your party cannon!"

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>>29843812
Gimme gimme gud grif green

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>>29846007
yiss

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i want to cum inside changeling worker #2206

do you think if i give her enough love she will become a queen

>>29843812
Holy shit, and you're a new writefag? Kek, I give up trying to write

>>29846360
It worked for Thorax.

>>29846417
Note to self: never give Changeling Worker #2206 enough love to become a queen

>>29846470
You're a mean one, Anonny.

>>29846360
I want to do a study on how changelings (particularly changeling queens) manage to stand with legs that are so full of holes. There has to reach a point where it becomes structurally unsound.

>>29846481
Their exoskeletons are very sturdy and powerful.

>>29846360

>Finally, your latest molt was complete.
>And it was a doozy.
>You do a 360 in front of the hyooman sized mirror and inspect your new form with no small amount of satisfaction.
>Gone was your hard chitin shell, replaced with thick skin coated in plush black fur.
>The holes in your legs has closed, leaving your limbs whole and strong once more.
>The same goes for your new, glossy wings.
>The fin on your head was gone and in its place was a silky mane worthy of a royal 'Ling.
>Even the build of your body had changed.
>Your head and muzzle had lost their angular shapes. Now you had a more rounded head and a softer muzzle.
>Your neck and torso had also elongated and thinned slightly.
>Turning around, you inspected your behind.
>Gone was your bony backside that was made for aerodynamics. Now you had a full rump, wide hips, and a narrowed waist that you're sure mammals would find most enticing.
>A flick of your tail confirmed that the changes you felt INSIDE your body during the molt were no trick.
>You now had everything you needed to breed and give birth like a mammal.
>Such drastic changes. No wonder your instincts told you to cocoon up for this one.
>You had been in the cocoon for 2 weeks. Your beloved most be worried sick by now.
>With a flicker of thought, you will the cocoon scraps around the bedroom to float to the trashcan. The scraps oblige with a green glow.
>A smile forms on your now soft lips. Your dear human had done so much for you. Putting up with your changeling eccentricities and feeding you the purest of love without asking for anything in return.
>A pony stallion would never be so accommodating.
>Your eyes turn to the bed and your smile turns into a smirk.
>It's time to repay him.
>And what better payment than a female tailored to his tastes?

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>>29846470
You don't like Fairy changelings?

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>>29846514
YES

>>29846514
I NEED more anon please

>>29846514
>Command Line: Fug Bug.

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>>29846514
How would you guys feel if you actually COULDN'T breed with your waifu and magic was not able to simply hand wave it away?

What if humans and ponies turned to changelings to be used as surrogates? Changelings being the only race that don't have any problems interbreeding with any species?

>>29846387
Fuck is that supposed to mean? Keep at it dude, I want to read whatever you write.

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>>29846514

>>29846514
>>Such drastic changes. No wonder your instincts told you to cocoon up for this one.
Fun fact: caterpillars dissolve into a goop when they turn into a butterfly. Changeling waifu here turned into pony-goop and then reformed into what we see here today.

>>29846647
I would love my waifu even if we couldn't have kids. All it does it give us more time the snuggle under the covers and/or in front of the fire.

>>29846647
> Changeling surrogates have about the status level of tertiary herdmare
> That is, something like a sister in law with benefits
> It's common for herd alpha's to insist on being the only thing the stallion sees as he inseminates the bug
> Others prefer the bug to copy their form for the entire procedure up until just after birth
> More open-minded mares treat the bugs as fellow herdmates
> The offspring itself has a strong resemblance to the father, but it will gain some of the traits of others in the herd depending on how much those mares give of their love to the bug

>>29846780
nice

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>>29846647
>>29846780
>tfw no qt brood changeling

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>>29844814
>World building
This is why I like you best.

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>Some pegasi eat fish, and they have a variety of ways to get some fresh.
>Many just using fishing poles like people.
>Others...
>Sometimes, you can spot Dash and other athletic pegasi hovering high over the river looking down intently.
>Then she dives into the water at breakneck speeds, and hops back out with a wriggly fish, looking proud of herself.
>She brings it to you after realizing she has no idea what to do with a fish and assuming you know how to cook.
>Another day with adorably sexist pones.

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>>29845426
>NMM wasn't borne of Luna's jealousy, but her smug arrogance
>She is the reason sex tends to happen at night
>Celestia was worshiped as the pure goddess that no colt wanted to blemish and is beyond /r9k/ levels of permavirgin

>>29847373
>>Celestia was worshiped as the pure goddess that no colt wanted to blemish and is beyond /r9k/ levels of permavirgin

>Being a Sunfag is suffering
>Anon was finally able to praise the sun, and her bounteous behind
>But when the ponies found out he had 'defiled' her
>That he had seduced their pure Princess with the power of HMD
>The once peaceful ponies suddenly wanted to lock him in Tartarus.
>Because only an evil Incubus could even desire, let alone achieve such a thing.

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>>29847365

>>29847373
I want a socially-oblivious, awkward Luna to try and seduce me. She'd probably see-saw between m'lording me and ranting about "those bucking chads" the entire evening

>>29847399
lol

When Celestia and Luna were young, before the whole princess alicorn thing, the gender roles were like ours, over time they changed to what they are now.
Celestia and Luna are uncomfortable having to be like they remember their father being. They would rather be like their mother, and be doted on by the stallion instead of the other way around.
Enter Anon.

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>>29847365
Sounds kinda beautiful to watch, pegasi dive bombing into a lake after fish, shooting back out with a stream of water droplets following them, manes wet, wings sparking and slick with water.

Yes, very beautiful.

>>29847591
>Throughly amazed one second
>Then touched when they drop the fish in front of you
>Then disappointed when they want you to make it for them because they don't know how to cook fish
No longer pegafu material

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>>29847373
>>29842655
>>She is the reason sex tends to happen at night
>Luna is a known as Princess for Sexual
>By pony standards.

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>>29847625
Says you, I'd filet that fish right fucking there and have a cook out right there by the lake with all the qt pegasusus there.

>>29847669
If she was offering the fish to say she could provide for you, then fine.
If she just wants some food because you're the closest male, and all males can cook good, then you could find a better birdbutt.

>>29847669
This, famalam.

>Not knowing how to cook fish for your waifus
It's like he's not even trying. Meet'em halfway, Anon.

>>29847679
Oh, shut up. It's cute horses doing cute horse things and hoping for a yummy grilled fish treat.

>>29847679
Just cook it for her and the other pegapones fishes as well, then you can demand cuddling in payment. Maybe even a few feathers from each and every mare present to stuff a pillow with, a downy soft pillow.

>>29847687
And then claim half that fish for yourself.

>>29847702
Well, of course. Grilled fish is fucking delicious.

>>29847707
What's your favorite? I fucking love northern and panfish, like sunfish and bluegills.

>>29847713
Oh man, I don't even know. It's been so long since my dad took me fishing. I'm not even sure what we caught, but it was good. I gotta go out and catch something again someday.

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>>29845426
>Anon prefers the night.
>Despite Twilight's best efforts she can't get him to hang out with her and her friends.
>Twenty minutes later she and Pinkie learn a valuable lesson.
>They and Anon can make accommodations to their schedules and meet at times that would be convenient for both of them.

>Meanwhile Celestia is still, after nearly a year, riding the high of the joy of having her sister back.
>But lately she's noticed how lonely Luna is.
>Then she receives a letter from her dear precious student.
>She learns more about the "hyoo-mun" Anon.
>She gets what she feels is an absolutely brilliant idea.
>Anon is nocturnal by choice. Her sister is the night.
>She'll introduce them.
>Luna will obviously be overjoyed, stallions that prefer the night usually turn out to be "stallions of the night."
>Maybe she'll finally have a non-sister friend that can understand her.

>Celestia deeply underestimates her sister's reaction.
>Luna decides to latch on tight and never let go.

Honestly he only reason I'm not nocturnal is because I have classes.

>>29847808
>>Luna decides to latch on tight and never let go.
My desperate loneliness demands more.

>>29843819
I do.

>>29847879
AYOOOOOO

Anon moves to the Crystal Empire, mostly because their gender roles are still "archaic" (like ours) and because he was irritated by Chublight and her friends constantly pestering him.

His new home is right next to the Crystal Palace.

Anon becomes "the girl next door" to Cadence, who finds herself increasingly tempted by him.

However, not only is he oblivious to her growing crisis, obstacles include Bro-Luna, who frequently drop by, and Celestia, who keeps trying to woo him with extravagant displays and gifts... and often self-foils.

>>29847931
>and often self-foils.

>Celestia sort of catches on to how he's basically a mare
>Tries to think of presents to give him that she herself would like to receive
>"Why didn't he like that enormous vibrating dildo I sent him?"

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>>29844798
>>”Applejack, Gilda please you know her name.”
>“Looks it’s not my fault that she just blends in the background so well!”
Kek

>>29847808
>Anon and Luna's nocturnal adventures.
>It's either creepy silent shit during the darkness or high octane chariot chases, shootouts and explosions.
>Interrupted by finding and eating at those cool places where the locals only knows about or awkward romantic silences and introspection while looking at the stars.
>they're not even looking for trouble they just somehow walks into it.

>>29847950
Sounds fun.

>>29847950
>Replacing the chocolate in Celestia's cakes with laxative chocolate
>Kek

>Celestia has had a long line of suitors over the years.
>But none of them ever stuck around for long.
>They claimed to love her at first, but they loved the idea of her, Celestia the Princess of the Sun
>They didn't love Celestia the pony

>They weren't gold diggers, or faking their interest in her (most of them anyway)
>But they couldn't handle the reality
>And when their image of the Perfect Pony Princess, who would cater to their every whim, was stripped away
>When they got to see a glimpse underneath the mask she wore, and saw the real her underneath, they didn't like it.

>That she got sad, angry, frustrated, and afraid just like everypony else
>That she wasn't always prim and proper
>That she had responsibilities
>That a crisis could and would happen at any time, and she would spend her days trying to keep her life's work from unraveling at the seams
>Facing horrors that only she can.

>That she would spend the majority of her time in court, listening to the requests, complaints, and demands of her subjects
>Or dealing with the nobility and the bureaucracy.
>Trying to juggle the needs of a kingdom instead of devoting all her attention to romance

>After the first few centuries of romantic failure, she resigned herself to the inevitable
>That love was an ephemeral thing, something she could only experience for a brief time, before it disappeared.

>She accepted less and less when a stallion would declare his love for her
>Knowing that the time would come when they would leave, having never really loved the real her at all.
>She wants to experience the real thing so badly, but it has eluded her all these years.
>When the pain of loss recedes, she lies to herself, that maybe this time, things will be different.
>And she indulges herself in this poor substitute for real love, until the high wears off, and it all comes crashing down again.

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>>29848026

>>29848026
>>29848057
oh my god make her happy, my heart can't take it.

>>29848026
Come Anon
>He's Realistic
>He's faithful.
>Doesn't complain about her working long hours.
>Prepares a nice bath and waits for her return.
>Makes her tea when she's stressed out.
>Listens to her problems.
>Takes her bad times in stride with the good times.
>Her anchor in the storm.
>Loves her for who she is
>Dies in sixty years.
>Love really is an ephemeral thing.

>>29848075
What is The Spring of Immortality/etc?

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>>29848075
t-thanks

Marelets, when will they learn

>>29848075
>He gave her one thing that would endure beyond his passing
>That would prevent her from spending all the years to come alone, should Luna's return go poorly.

>A daughter
>A mare who would soon claim the title of the Princess of Love

>>29848075
>Celestia's heart couldn't take it anymore becomes Nightmare Star.
>Subjugates all the enemies of Equestria within and without in mere days.
>Anon is resurrected because of a series of convoluted and practically retarded events that involves Pinkie Pie discovering the Colonel's 11 secret spices, the mirror pool, Anon's body and three fiddy bits.
>Celestia returns to normal and Anon is wondering why everyone is scared of his sweet heart.

>>29848149
sheeeeiiiiit

>>29848158
>Beloved dies.
>Subjugates all the enemies of Equestria.
What is the relevance?

>>29848172
>This is your brain on Crazy

>>29844814
Gilda...Pinkie is one of the few beings that could fuck with Grifga till she submits. You cant win here.

>>29848158
>Instead of Anon coming back to the world of the living he haunts her.
>He is saddened by what his Tia has become.
>Celestia sometimes feels something rubbing the side of her neck in bed like Anon used to when she was in a poor mood.
>She will occasionally see him in court, he always looks so sad.
>She doesn't understand.
>She thinks it's because she isn't being strict enough.
>That must be it!
>His mood only gets worse.
>Whenever she sees him he's now crying.
>She no longer feels a touch in bed, she only hears a slight crying next to her.
>She doesn't care anymore, that's not her husband.
>He's dead.

>>29848075
>sixty years.
Cancer so quickly.

>>29848350
Assuming he isn't an underageb& that would put him at ~80 when he died.

>>29848365
If you believe hard enough, it must be true.

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>>29847808
>Luna goes full-on "Kind and Chivalrous Knightess of Olde" for you.
>Play along and be her "Fair ManMaiden", both because it's adorable and it makes Luna genuinely happy.

>>29846765
That's some Evangelion shit nigga

>>29848311
STOP

>>29843812
Pretty good. I'd like to read more.

>>29844907
>then he not on this 4chan or any drawing thread
You're very, very wrong.

>>29848311
More bad feel come on I wish to have my spirit crushed

>>29848906
I like my romantic greentext where Anon is ambiguously immortal and/or the issue of him eventually dying is never ever addressed. Let me dream, they're all I have.

>>29847654
He has to show them why. It's his duty to educate them.

>>29847585
Do it, faggot.

Hey again, back with more green about humans and catbutts.

>>29846387
Thank you for the compliment anon. I've only written some small short-stories Both of which you can find in the pastebin /ShamelessSelfplug).
As well as a trainwreck of a story I wrote earlier

If you're having problems writing, the best piece of advice I can give you is to try and find what areas of writing you're not so good in. For me personally, conversations are difficult. I often catch myself writing something like "And then he said, and then she said, but then they said..." and so on. I like to write out the conversaitons on in a rough style and then add more details and thoughts to it afterwards.
But I digress.


>>29843812
> As it turned out, Anonymous’ idea of “sharing the workload back” consisted of crafting you a harness as well. He had taken a new length of rope, and using one his bracelets, made you a small strap similar to his.
> His bracelet was placed in front of your chest beneath the coarse rope, to prevent it from gnawing in your plume. Had to give the guy credit, he came up with that on his own. It even helped dissipate the strain from the dragging.
> Also, it felt kinda nice to have a guy tuzzle your fluff.
> MommaLikes.purr.
> Anonymous stops his adjustments of the rope, giving you a questioning look. Awkwardly, you hold a claw to your beak and cough.
“Sorry, got something in my throat,” you say.
> “Suuuuure,” he says, a smirk dancing across his lips.
> Buck.
> He moves to your left, adjusting the straps. Following the length of the strap, he comes up to the ropes connecting on your back. They’re joined together with his own harness, making it impossible for you to flee without dragging him and the stag along for the ride.

>>29849171
> Moving down your back, he probes your thigh with a digit, tracing the curvature of your leg.
“Wha-what are you doing?!” you ask miffed.
> “Nothing, nothing. Just wondering how much pull there is in those scrawny things,” he mentions nonchalantly.
“Pl-plenty enough for this, you jerk!” You splutter incredulously. He laughs softly. “S-so, how are we gonna do this?”
> Looking his own harness over again, Anonymous stands up, and points at what you expect to be the direction of Ponyville.
> “You’re in the front, I’ll guide,” he explains. “If we make good speed, we’ll be back in roughly one hour.”
> Nodding, you wait for him to begin walking and you fall in line in the front. It feels kind of strange with Anonymous walking a couple of feet behind you.
> It’s been only been five minutes, but it’s already getting on your nerves. The only sounds are the quiet dragging of the stag, and Anonymous’ and yours breathing.
> The silence of the woods starts getting on you immediately. The constraining feeling of the strap preventing you from flapping your wings, how the ropes moved with your body.
> You have to break the silence, or you’ll go crazy.
“So… um, big guy, what’s your story,” you begin, hoping to both break the stiffness of the situation and to maybe get on his good side. You might even get some juicy details you could use later.
> Huffing in thought, Anonymous goes quiet for a moment.
> “My name is Anonymous Incognito, and I’m a human”, he says. Nothing new, you muse.
> “As far as I know, I’m the first of my name, and the last of my kind.” He continues. The sudden gloominess of his statement catches you off guard, making you stumble.
> You turn your head to look at him. A wide grin on his face.

>>29849177
> “Nah, I’m just pulling your tail,” he laughs. “Twilight did some magic mumbo-jumbo summoning ritual. Whatever creature she hoped to summon, saucy alien or whatever, it sure wasn’t little old me, she expected to turn up in that circle of kitchen salt and theatrical blood.”
“Aha…” you answer, not really knowing how to respond.
> “She’s been hard at work at finding a way to send me back, but to be quite honest, I’m not in a hurry.”
“Why’s that?” you ask baffled. “Don’t you have a place to return to?”
> The silence returns for a time. The creaking of the ropes is the only new sound every now and then.
> Glacing back over your shoulder, you see him looking to his right. His features are hard to read. Studying his face in detail, you make a small note of the sharpness of his features.
> A pointy nose protrudes from his flat face. Combined with his wide brows and semi-long beard, he has this aura of confidence surrounding him. Commanding respect to his stature. His beard is a mix of dark-brown and black streaks.
> He turns his head back to look at you, a small smile on his lips.
> “Let’s just say that I’m okay with where I am right now, and keep it that.”
> You nod, opting not to probe at the subject.
> “What’s your name, birdie?”
“Gilda,” you answer. Humming, he accepts your answer.
> As you turn to continue on your way back, Anonymous begins whistling. The sounds is melodic, and carries a nice little charm to it. It swirls in momentum, depth and span, echoing through the woods.
> You have to stop yourself from chirping along. You’d downright die from embarrassment.

>>29849180
> Finally, after what feels like eternities, you arrive on the outskirts of Ponyville. The human points to a large wooden house near the edge of the forest.
> As you get closer, you can spot what looks like a herb garden on the side of the house. The soft smell of garlic, rosemary, basil, dill, parsley, and even thyme surrounds the entrance to his home. On the other side, you spy rows of tomatoes and potato stalks.
“Aren’t tomatoes and garlic…” you begin.
> “poisonous to ponies? Yes, they are.” He begins loosening the ropes around himself, and the ones connected to your harness. “Had one hell of a discussion with Twilight about growing those. Luckily, my “stallionly whimsy” won in the end,” he says with a smirk.
> He reaches into his tunic, producing an iron key hanged in a brass chain from his neck. “Go on open up the door, I’ll be there in a second,” he says, turning back to the stag.
> Walking up to the front door, you insert the key into the keyhole, and twist the doorknob. As you open the door, Anonymous speaks up again.
> “Oh yea, you might want to know that I live with Loki.”
“What is a Lo-“ you say, only to feel the weight of a large furry creature ram your side, tackling you on your back.
> The soft fur and self-righteous growling of, well, a pony-sized dog permeates your sight, hearing and smell.
> A thunderous laughter erupts from Anonymous. “I see you’re already well acquainted,” he comments. Hearing its owner voice, the dog snaps to his side, craving its master’s attention.
> You wobble back onto your paws.
> Petting the dog affectionately, Anonymous then lifts up the stag onto his shoulders, and moves sideways through the door. You follow behind the menagerie, Loki brushing up and down your side in affection.

>>29849184
> Moving carefully through the house, Anonymous leads you to a large white-tiled kitchen. Placing the deer down on a small raised platform, also covered in the tiles, he moves through the room, lighting candles.
> You sit down on a chair by a small table. Loki, on his part, sits in front you front, wearing the droopy happy smile only a dog can.
> You awkwardly extend a claw to pet its head. The dog closes its eyes, seemingly content with your poor excuse for pets.
> After a moment, Anonymous has lighted up most of the candles in the room, and places down a cylindrical leather piece on the table. Unfurling the bag reveals rows of tools.
> Bone saws, cutting knives, tongs…
“T-that’s for the stag, right?” you hesitate.
> “Huh? Oh yea, that’s for the stag,” he confirms. “Never really like the taste of fowl…” he mumbles.
“What’s that supposed to mean?” you croak.
> Anonymous chuckles, “Relax, catbutt. I’m not going to cut you up.” He reaches over for a small knife in the bag, and moves back to the deer. Carefully, he begins skinning the animal, starting at its hooves. He works slowly, and steady across the length of the animal.
> You watch him, fascinated by his methodical way of work. He works tirelessly for hours.
> As he tugs off the skin of the stag, he grabs a small shower head, and hoses down the body of blood. He places the hide to the side, and retrieves a large knife and the bonesaw.
> As he begins to cut through the stag, you feel your eyes get heavy. It had been a long day, and the trek back had taken its toll on you. You lean over the table, relaxing your spent body.
> Before you know it, you’re fast asleep.

>>29849187
> You open your eyes from a dreamless slumber. Looking around you reveals your placement on a sofa way too large for you. A heavy sheet is draped across your body, and a soft pillow acts as your headrest.
> The soft smell of black coffee welcomes you to the world of the living. You spy the dog laying in front of the roaring fire in the hearth across the room.
> Only the occasional crack of the fireplace breaks the silence.
> You hear the sound of a door opening, and you turn your head to watch Anonymous step through the front door. In his hands is a small bag marked “SCC”, a clear indicating of his visit to the local bakery.
> “’Morning, I remembered I ran out of bread last night, so I went to get some more. I also hope you like coffee, it’s the only thing I got to spare,” he says.
“Yea, sure, it’s fine.” You reply, smelling the delicacies in the bag.
> “I’m gonna make some eggs as well, how do you like yours?” he asks, moving back into the kitchen.
“Fertilized,” you say unabated.
> Realization of what your stupid brain just said hits you like a cart. A feeling of absolute horror comes right after that.
> Anonymous stops, and looks at you. “Scrambled, got it,” he says.
> Someone please kill you.


And that's what I have for now. Let me know if I screwed up in a line or if there's somewhere I can improve. I'll be updating the pastebin in a sec.

Take care, anons.

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>>29849191
>> “I’m gonna make some eggs as well, how do you like yours?” he asks, moving back into the kitchen.
>“Fertilized,” you say unabated.
Cheeky, I like.

>>29849187
> After a moment, Anonymous has lighted up most of the candles in the room...
Although lighted is appropriate here, lit may be a better fit, since Anon performed the action of lighting them, making the more verb-appropriate 'lit' fit better.
Plus, it helps the sentence flow better, in my opinion at least.

>>29849206
You realize, as an egg laying species gryphons might not eat eggs.

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؜>>29842655

>Not posting full pic

>>29849191
Oh....this thirsty little burb is asking for a breeding. SCRAMBLE HER EGGS MAN, SCRAMBLE THEM HARD!

>>29849269
You realise that eating other mammals babies has never been frowned upon in human history, thus making your argument invalid.

>>29849297
Wait, is this the real DWK? Does he come here? I thought he would spend his time on the glimshit threads and HHH.

>>29849297
I hate that one particular Flurry Heart so much. It's one of the only things that triggers my autism.

>>29849191
>Fertilized
My sides cant handle

>>29849368
>You realise that eating other mammals babies has never been frowned upon in human history, thus making your argument invalid.
I'm sorry Anon, I didn't realize that you were an expert on the cultural practices of a fictional race of sapient bird people. Srs, not even from an ethical point of view, but economically eating tiny baby animals is more expensive than letting them grow into something that actually provides a decent amount of meat. inb4 veal

>>29849269
Chickens will eat unfertilized eggs if you let them.

>>29849297
That one comic this dude made where Cadence slapped the SHIT out of Flurry Heart almost gave me an erection. I was so disappointed when it turned out it was just a dream.

>>29849171
>Also, it felt kinda nice to have a guy tuzzle your fluff.
kek, I don't know why I find that line so funny. I guess coming from my preconceived notions of Gilda.

>>29849191
>“I’m gonna make some eggs as well, how do you like yours?” he asks, moving back into the kitchen.
>“Fertilized,” you say unabated.
Yet more hilarity. good job. I'm already liking this Gilda.

Thanks for the update and the laughs QoC! I look forward to reading more.

>>29849429
To give just one example, in Iceland, only a few decades ago, it was quite popular to eat nearly fully developed chicken eggs. In fact my great grandmother did it all the time.

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>>29849368
>You realise that eating other mammals babies has never been frowned upon in human history

What?
No, not at all.
In my country alone historically eating young lamb (and other mammals) has always been done, without any form of stigma whatsoever.
I forgot what mammal it is, but there's a niche food made out of digested mother's milk and grass in the youngsters of that animal that is considered a delicacy.
And it's not rare either, all over the world eating other mammals youngsters is pretty common and has been common all over history.

To be specific the meat of the young is easier to rend and digest, so it makes perfect sense that humanity would consider it a delicacy.
The trend of "all life is sacred animals must be protected and treated humanly" is pretty recent, for most of human history humanity itself was #1 and beasts were just treated like...well, beasts.

Sometimes i really feel like some incredibly sheltered millenials that literally don't know shit about anythin post here.

>>29849558
>>29849429

>You realise that eating other mammals babies has never been frowned upon in human history
>I'm sorry Anon, I didn't realize that you were an expert on the cultural practices of a fictional race of sapient bird people.

What?
No, not at all.
In my country alone historically eating young lamb (and other mammals) has always been done, without any form of stigma whatsoever.
I forgot what mammal it is, but there's a niche food made out of digested mother's milk and grass in the youngsters of that animal that is considered a delicacy.
And it's not rare either, all over the world eating other mammals youngsters is pretty common and has been common all over history.

To be specific the meat of the young is easier to rend and digest, so it makes perfect sense that humanity would consider it a delicacy.
The trend of "all life is sacred animals must be protected and treated humanly" is pretty recent, for most of human history humanity itself was #1 and beasts were just treated like...well, beasts.

Sometimes i really feel like some incredibly sheltered millenials that literally don't know shit about anythin post here.

>>29849558
>>29849566

untry alone historically eating

rend and digest, so it makes perfect sense that humanity would consider it a delicacy.
The trend of "all life is sacred animals must be protected and treated humanly" is pretty recent, for most o has always been done, without any form of stigma whatsoever.
I forgot what mammal it is, but there's a niche food made out of digested mother's milk and grass in the youngsters of that animal that is considered a delicacy.
And it's not rare either, all over the world eating other mammals youngsters is pretty common and has been common all over history.

To be specific the meat of the young is easier to rend and digest, so it makes perfect sense that humanity would consider it a delicacy.
The trend of "all life is sacred animals must be protected and treated humanly" is pretty recent, for most of human history humanity itself was #1 and beasts were just treated like...well, beasts.

anythin post here.

What's happening

>>29849595
l life is sacred animals must be protecte treated humanly" mother's milk and grass in the youngsters of that animal that is considered a delicacy.
And it's not rare either, all over the world eating other mammals youhelpmengsters is pretty common and has been common all over history.

To be specific the meat of the young is easier to rend and digest, so it makes perfect sense that humanity would consider it a delicacy.
The trend of "all life is sacred animals must be protected and treated humanly" is pretty recent, for most of hum To be specific history humanity itself was #1 and beasts were just treated li beasts humanly sacred animals must be protected

AAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!

>>29849634
Did you snort crack before posting?

>>29849634
WAAAAAUUGGGHHH!?

>>29849641
People are stressed...

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>>29849634
WAAAAAAAAAAAAGH!

>>29847654
Plot twist: all ponies fall asleep immediately after sex, no matter how much energy they had beforehand. No exceptions.

>>29849634
>>29849655
>>29849712
No, look carefully. The guy is totally throwing up.

>>29849269
Actually, some species of birds eat the eggs they lay if they're unfertilized to get the calcium back if it's not in ready supply.

>>29849413
>>29849297
>>29849451

>Anon is in the Crystal Empire's Royal Herd with Shining and Cadence
>Cadence has given birth to both of their children
>Anon takes issue with how much of total brat teenage Flurry Heart compared to Venus, his daughter with Cadence
>He tries to discipline her
>However in herds with more than one stallion, its generally not acceptable for one male to discipline another male's child
>Shining and Anon start fighting over this

>>29849840
Like Shining would fight back. He's a total bottom bitch.

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>>29849991

>Anon and Cadence double-teaming Shining in the bedroom

>>29850007
>Anon and Cadence double-teaming Shining in the bedroom
They literally wrestle in the palace bedroom.
>They've got him in a lock!
>1!
>2!
>3!
>Shining is down! Gentlecolts and Ponies, the new tag team champions, Cadence and Anonymouuuuus!!!!!!
>Crowd roars.

>>29850044

>teenage Flurry Heart is actually justified in being completely done with this shit because her parents have literal wrestling matches in their bedroom with a full audience and announcer
>It's always at night too so she never gets any sleep

>>29848906
Okay.
>>29848311
>Be Celestia.
"Chrysalis. For your crimes against Equestria, I hereby sentence you to life in the dungeon."
>"B-But, I changed! I've seen my wrong doing! Please!" She begs as you guards drag her away.
>She should have known better.
"Court is closed for today."
>You begin to walk away, your old student looks disappointed but holds her tongue.
>You don't care, she failed you when he passed.
>Luna walks up to you as you exit court.
>"Sister, perhaps you should have been more lenient on Chrysalis. Miss Sparkle did say she was sorry. She could be refor-"
"Luna, I've been running this contrary for far longer than you. I know what I'm doing, do not question me."
>She looks taken aback.
>"Sister please, you must forget about An-"
"If you know what's good for you, you WON'T finish that."
>You say glaring down at Luna.
>She backs away, her ears back.
>You are about to lay into her until you hear a familiar voice.
>"Please... Don't... Tia..." It whispers.
>You turn around to look for him but see nothing.
>You huff.
"I'll be in my room. Do not disturb me."
>You say walking way from your sister.
>"She's... Right..." The voice whispers again.
>You ignore it and keep walking.
>"Please... Forget..."
>As you pass guard the salute.
>"Please... For... Me..."
>You enter your room and slam the door shut before collapsing on your bed, tears staining your cheeks.
>You feel a cool breeze wrap around you as you lay there.
"I can't."
>You say in between sobs.
"I can't forget you... Please, please come back. I miss you. I need you!"
>Your once radiant mane is now laying down flat.
>It's normally like that now, you just use magic to make it look like normal.
"I'm so sorry I failed you..."
>That was the last thing you said before you cried yourself to sleep.
>You swear you could hear a slight crying beside you.

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>>29849191
This is cozy. Also I get that reference.

>>29850150
>I've been running this contrary for
that contrary sure is a hard thing to run, aint it. And the entire premise is bullshit because AJ can just tell her he's there with Sparklebutt doing magic shit to establish a communication line, like a living caller id detector.

>>29850198
Fucked up on Country because of a quick click on Microsoft word, Sorry man. I tried to do good, sorry you didn't enjoy it.

>>29850166
jokes on her, thats my fetish

>>29850166
Huh, gryphons are even uglier in anthro form.

Can someone help me get in touch with BrandNewWrightfag? I'm getting the 3 cows from cow tipping made, one pic for each, and it would be unbelievably helpful if the artist can ask him questions
I'm paying $35 per pic so I want it to go well

>>29849231
Thank you for pointing that out. Rereading the segment, "lit" is the better option. It's been corrected in the pastebin.

>>29849462
Thanks, I'll need some time to think over how to progress from here, but I'll definitively keep you guys updated.

Also, how would you guys feel if the PoV is shifted from Gilda the spaghettimancer to Anon? Of course, only when necerssary, the PoV would still mainly be burd.


>>29850166
So happy someone caught that.

>>29850272
I'm even having my girlfriend do toppless reference pose pics to make the art better

>>29850278
Post the reference pics here.

>>29850525
G to /s/ if you want to see human tits, homo

daniel

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>>29842677
Ah, the time of year when ponies fuck and you at least get to watch, as you don't secrete the right pheromones to get mares' attention. Plus they want foals, so yeah...

In an attempt to impress Anon, Cadence signs up for the "Rough Mudder" competition to show she's a "real mare".

To her and everyone else's surprise, Anon also signs up.

Drama, drama, Luna and Celestia spying to see a half-naked Anon sweat during training, yadi-yada.

>>29850737
Get lost cuckboi, we fuck cowgirls, bug girls, catburds, and sirens here.

>>29850737
uh... it's the mares that secrete the pheromones

>>29850765
Its an idiot that doesn't want to get laid, just point and laugh.

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>>29850765
And they also tend to be interested in anything that smells like a male, even their male owners.

>>29842677
Little fun factoid for ya'll: The length and fequency of estrus is governed by how much light there is in a day. So basically, Celestia can make ponies go into heat whenever she wants

>>29850785
>I learned everything I know about horses on /mlp/

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>>29850785
s-so it's true they can smell boners?

>>29850809
>he hasn't heard the stories or seen the videos of mares backing themselves into ranch hands or horse owners during estrus

>>29850765
Both female and male urine contains characteristic smells.

>>29850765
I was going to say while stallions have a scent/pheromone I think it is the mares scent/pheromone that is much much stronger and is the attractor.

>>29850275
Shift PoV if needed for story progression but I am kinda liking Gilda's perspective.

>>29849191
...Damn you and your faster updates...
That being said don't be afraid to try experimenting with new mannerisms for our local catbutt. Mainly stuff like what they call males, Cocks and Roosters, other things of that like. Though we could try to go for alot of catpuns since they are part cat...

>>29850825
I work with horses daily. A mare doesn't normally recognise humans as sexual mates unless she has learned to. I'll leave it up to you to figure out how that can happen. Also, it's a somewhat common mating ritual for mares to back up towards stallions when they're ready to mate, but very rarely directly into them. I've heard the stories and they're pretty far-fetched.
This is just another popular misconception that appeals to "horsefucker's" fetishes, like the "self-abortion" ability, or the vaginal muscle control nonsense.

>>29850901
Are you on the discord? Ask BNW about >>29850272

>>29850816
No cadance fuck off

>>29850875
You're right. Stallions don't need to signal that they're about to ovulate. Men don't definitely don't smell like stallion, though, but I don't think it makes sense to call these smells "pheromones", but then again I don't know the exact definition of the word pheromone.

File: 1382641__safe_artist-colon-frenkieart_big+macintosh_cloudchaser_flitter_prince+blueblood_shining+armor_thunderlane_male_parody_sign_stallion.png (1MB, 2450x1100px) Image search: [Google]

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>Due to some bizarre 500 year old laws, stallions can only legally be paid in goods, not bits

>>29850914
So, what is actually true then?

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I want to service my mare after she comes home from a long day of work.

>>29851039
I want my mare to know that she can rely on me and looks forward to seeing me at the end of the day.

>>29850951
[email protected]
Ye ye ye just go ahead and send him the details here my man. He's at work atm

>>29851090
Thanks

>>29851017
You need to be more specific. I can't think of many reproduction-related things, but off the top of my head - for example fillies start ovulating pretty young, at 16 months or so, but they grow up fast, stallions can actually ejaculate semen directly in the cervical canal and beyond, mares really do start their cycle in summer after a period of anestrus, there's nothing wrong with consensual horsefucking, horses do have four legs.

>>29851039
>>29851058
Don't, the femdom fag will come back.

>>29851151
>Welcoming your wife home from work with a hot dinner
>Not spitting in her face and telling her to make it herself
Absolutely degenerate.

>>29850977
I love that last frame.
>"Not just a sex object, huh Thunderlane? Sure thing, babe, whatever you say. Lemme cop a feel of that chest tuft, sweet cheeks."

>>29850914
>Nothing about horse assholes.
Ponuts confirmed for marvel of evolutionary biology.

>>29851146
can a normal sized man please a mare?

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Human on RGRE Equestria Girl.

>>29851258
I ask myself the same thing every day.

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>>29850750
Just having good fun triggering estrusfags, memeboi. No need to get your jimmies in a rustle for my amusement. But if you insist, by all means do.

>>29850825
Really? Then I suppose some of those pony mares who're as intelligent as earth horses would settle even for you if they were retarded enough to think you could give them foals.

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>>29850150
How much would Celestia suffer if instead of simply passing away, Anon suffered alzheimer and is slowly losing his consciousnes and there is absolutely nothing she can do about it.

The man she loves is nothing but a shadow off his past self, he can't even eat by himself anymore.

>"Where's your unicorn student Cely?".
>"Twilight is an alicorn now dear, we had dinner with the elements in her castle last week".
>"N...noo I mean your favorite student.
>"Anon?"
>"the one with the red mane, I was teaching her how to play poker, but nobody in the castle tells me where she is".
>"Maybe I should ask to the pony with the beard, What was his name?"

According to some posts from the Zoophilia forum, mares sometimes pretend to be in heat to get the human fuck them.

Very interesting.

>>29850750
You keep using that word. I don't think it means what you think it does.

>>29851293
Yesssss

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>>29842677

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>>29851393
The rest of it is soo lewd

>>29851393
GriffonXPony is disgusting.

>>29851393
Racemixing is fucking disgusting

>>29851293
>"Hey there, hot stuff. Want me to carry those books for you? You've got algebra next, right? Cool, cool. The name's Rainbow Dash - remember that, 'cuz you'll be moaning it by this Saturday night."
>You are Anon, and Twilight fucked up on getting you home; you're now a 17-year-old high schooler at horse-human school.
>You do your best to stay positive and try to consider this an opportunity to breeze through high school and enjoy an extra ten years of your life.

>>29851258
I've seen video that suggests yes.