RGRE: Reversed Gender Roles Equestria

>>29150732
>Lyra is Anon's Niece

This explains much about her.

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HAVE LOTS OF EQUESTRIAN FOALS
FIND STRONG AND HEALTHY MATES FOR STRONG AND HEALTHY BABIES
DO YOUR PART
POPULATE EQUESTRIA

>>29149585
>>29150510
>>29150520
>>29150551
>>29150647
>>29150686

Cross-postin' cuz an Anon told me to

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>>29150769
I'm working on it!

>The mares want to dance slow dance with the humans because their faces end up at just above crotch height.

>>29150763
Incognito is a cousin, usually, right? First cousins once removed often call each other aunt/niece uncle/nephew.
Could also be an niece by law.

>>29128315
Man. The last thread went on for an unusually long time after it hit the limit.

>>29150874
>and then anon got down on his hands and knees

Guys, tell me the best cloaked/caped heavy armour set in the dark souls games. It's for Green reasons.

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>>29150999
Fallen Knight set.

>>29151104
KYLO REN, IS THAT YOU?

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>>29151117
ok how bout the Cathedral Knight armor?

>>29151128
Deus Vult.

I'll go with Fallen Knight, thanks, Anon.

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>>29151143
>Not using ds3 dragon slayer's armour.
Also.
>No story of Anon in that armour becoming *Enter princess's name* 's personal royal guard.
Honestly you could go alot of places in RGRE with Anon being a royal guard. Could make it sad were Anon losses his best friend or mare friend in combat, and now has to move on with his life. Could make it were Anon struggles up the ranks because he's a male. Or another guard, and or, princess takes a liking to him but fears to act on it in fear of getting their rep ruined or losing their job. Or Anon secretly loves gaurd or princess.
If gaurd then it is the same problem as the guard/princess thing. If princess it's the fear that she won't have the same feelings and will turn him down or fire him.

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>>29151104
>>29151128
>not Undead Legion set

>Chrysalis disguises herself as a pony to head into town for supplies
>She overhears a conversation between two mares, shittalking a single mother for depriving her foals of a father
>They say that mares lack the paternal touch that foals need to grow into well-balanced ponies
>Chrysalis decides that her brood needs a dad
>Guess which local human male is single and ripe for kidnapping?

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Okay so. Question that may get me banned but. Why the fuck did ming fucking lee disable (You)s? Is he fucking retarded or just trying to piss people off?

>>29151250
Bit of column a) bit of column b), the idiot probably thinks that removing them would discourage shitposters from posting if they cant find their response. 5 says it goes back to the way it was in a few weeks.

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>>29151250
He probably invested his money in the (You)s, and is now going to re-sell them at much higher price come new year.

>>29151266
He'll make it so only premium users can see them.

>>29151250
MY GOD. I just noticed this. I have crippling depression. How am I supposed to fuel my (you) addiction Now?

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I'm bored, recommend some good rgre story pastebins please.

>>29151280
By yelling very loudly at Ming to fix the problem?

>>29151280
Here is .....................

>>29151294
>>29151289

This is not as satisfying. Utter disappointment abound.

>>29151233
I am intrigued. continue.

> Be Anon
> Every day, a certain gray mare flaps by your window and waves at you
> She's pretty cute, and it's a nice little happy note in your day
> Today, though, she is running late
> Well, later than her usual lateness
> You wait restlessly, worrying
> Did something happen to her?
> Did she crash into something?
> You jump, startled by a knock at the door
> You open it to find her, smiling her goofy smile
"Uh, Hi. Everything going okay?"
> She nods
> "Yup! I have a package for you."
> She digs into her satchel and pulls out a little box with her mouth
> Is that...
> It's a ring box
> You accept it with trembling hands
> This is too sudden, what are you even supposed to say?
> Derpy beams at you
> "Open it!"
> You do
> Inside is a gold ring, far too large for any of your fingers, but too small to be a bracelet
"Um, Derpy? What is this?"
> She lowers her head, shyly looking up at you, at least that's what you think her derpy eyes are doing
> "It's a dong ring, Anon. Will you be my rutbuddy? We can get it resized if it's too small."
> Your eyes fill with tears
"Yes! A thousand times, yes! I'll be happy to be you rutbuddy."
> Music swells in the background as you unzip your pants
> Derpy is a little misty eyed too as she accepts the dong ring in her mouth
> Your length slides through the ring, her tongue coaxing you deeper into her mouth
> She gags slightly as you hilt, the ring snug around the base of your member
> You slowly pull out, fighting the suction of her mouth the whole way
> With a final pop, you are free
"Let's take this inside, bubble butt."
> She blushes happily, tail twitching like mad

> Rarity fans herself, her cheeks rosy
> "As sweet as that was, darling, why are you telling me this?"
> You pull a box from your pocket
"Poor Derpilicious is worn out, we need another mare on the totem pole."
> She gasps, her sparkling eyes locked on the diamond-studded dong ring

>>29151344
> "Far be it from me to fail in my duty as a lady to help a stallion in need. I will be honored to be your second dalliancée!"

>>29151215
The helm is just way to dinky. Everything else about it is pretty great.
>That tiny detail of the abyss tendrils creeping up on the back of the cloak.

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>>29151375
That ain't ma' tendril bitch.

>>29151344
>>29151348
My dick doesn't know whether or not to say Yessss or dawww. What do I do?

>>29151344
THIS! THIS IS THE LEGEND OF DONG RING!

>"These are Kilo volts (230-700) lines being opened under a load. When the switch contacts are pulled apart an electric arc predictably starts. While the contacts are close to each other the arc runs along a straight path between the contacts. Then as contacts are pulled further apart the arc starts to bend and turn into a steep curve and its length becomes several times greater than the distance between the contacts. Then finally the arc just fades out"

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>>29151344

>>29151280
>How am I supposed to fuel my (you) addiction Now?

Custom CSS brings them back. 4chanX never removed them.

>>29151104
Crapped-pants-kun!

>>29151599
Okay call me a newfag but. What?

>>29151710
Newfag.

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>Anon wasn't the only human transported
>A small human city formed in Ancient Equestria, shaping large parts of history
>Including forming traditional human gender roles across society
>Suddenly a disaster hits the human city, forcing them to pause time in order to control the disaster
>The site became a tourist attraction , with many pony tour guides using their magic to resist the spells effects, and take their groups to the hills around the town
>Anon becomes famous as the last human visible on the edge of the tour group safe zone, frozen away from the city (cause he's a fucking loner)
>a brave science expedition is undertaken, moving past the safe zone and bring the human back
>Now anon is a few thousand years out of date, a national monument walking, and subject to a variety of exaggerated stories about the power and sexual prowess of humans
>Bonus points for dong ring

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>>29151713
Oh~ now slap my ass and call me a whore~

>>29151735
Rarity.

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>>29151738
Nice try Twilight dear, but just because you repulse cock like magnet it doesn't mean you have to be this jealous

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>>29151738
That's right darling~

>>29151733
That would be a neat premise, but it doesn't really seem all that RGRE enough.

>>29151797
Anon from traditional role s moving into 'modern' roles, as well as dealing with the fact that its the future and dong rings are mandatory

>>29151749
>She enjoying suck anon's dick

>>29151710
Paste this:

a.quotelink.ql-tracked:after {
content:" (You)";
}

Into your custom CSS to get (You)s and ellipses.

>>29151950
>>29151710

Jesus Christ, just google "4chanX" and install that shit, the website is better with it anyway

>>29151995
4chanX is shit. It's fine if you're too stupid to edit custom CSS, but have the decency to just admit it.

>>29151995
>>29152011
Shut up and write RGRE!

>>29151250
Gook-Moot took a look at the site and asked himself, "How can I make this worse?"

>>29151735
>"Harder, daddy!"
>You are Anon
>You just walked outside to get your mail, only for your crotch to slam into Rainbow's ass before you even noticed she was there.
>She had been waiting for you, ass hiked up and tail raised.
>"N-Now call me a newbie!"
"Rainbow, this needs to stop."

>>29152011
Sounds like SOMEBODY had trouble figuring out how to make 4chanX give him his (you)s back.

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>>29152148
>>29152152
>You just walked outside to get your male

>>29152167
No, see, it works. Anon went to get his mail, and Rainbow went go get her male. I'm hungover, Anon.

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>>29152167
>"Anon!"
Yes, honey?
>"You don't need to mess around in the garden today!"
>A magic glow highlights your shirt and lightly tugs you
>"You'll get dirty and I still didn't eat breakfast yet!"
>You're dragged into the castle and the door slams shut.
>"Besides, I'm in heat and I need you inside all day."

>>29152189
"Then go use that thing you keep under your bed, I have better things to do."

>>29152189
>You scoop your purple princess up as soon as you pass through the nearest secure doors, which was when she dropped her magical grip
>The whole "grab your stallion by the balls and drag him inside your marecave for sex" thing was mostly just for show for her guards.
>Twilight still got adorably bashful and sometimes felt the need to "assert" herself in front of so many others, which led to her being much more sexually aggressive with you while in the presence of others.
>She'd always explain it away as "marechismo" and make it up to you by letting you blow raspberries into her belly.
>But in private? She's still the adorkable pudgy little nerd you fell in love with.

>>29152269
>You hold her close to your chest and boop her on the nose.
>Her eyes follow the tip of your finger and her tongue laps flaccidly out of her mouth, as though she were unconsciously (subconsciously?) trying to lick you.
"Would you really like that, Twilight?"
>You hand drags down from the tip of her nose, across her lips (snagging the wet tip of her tongue) and slowly makes its way down to her tummy.
"Cuz if I worked a bit in the garden, then I imagine that I'd be all hot and sweaty by the time I..."
>You pause for emphasis.
"....came inside."
>Twilight shudders as your fingers find her tuft and bury themselves into it.
>Her tail whips around for a moment and the pungent (and mouth-watering) smell of Twilight in heat hits you like a bus.
>"W-Would you?" she asks breathlessly
"Yeah."
>You press your fingers down a bit more firmly and let your fingernails scratch her skin slightly.
>Twilight wriggles for a moment and whines in frustration.
"You'd have to - Oh!"
>After a moment of contemplation, Twilight apparently decides that foreplay time is over and that satisfying her heat can't wait.
>Her horn glows and your belt, pants, and underwear cease to exist (but you know she really just teleported them to Rarity's place to be washed... which she'll do after she spends an hour or two, eyes closed, with your underwear laying over her muzzle)
>Your vision turns purple and, for just a moment, your head tastes sideways; Twilight's brought you to your bedroom.
>Twilight's magic tugs you over to the bed, and you let her push you onto your back.
>Twilight, blushing and dripping fluids all over your crotch, plants her hooves on either side of your head and glowers down at you hungrily.
>"Oh, Anon," she giggles, "You don't need to do any silly gardening to get all hot and sweaty."
>She leans down and licks your cheek before leaning in close to your ear.
>"And I'll make sure you come inside."
>Y-You too.

>>29152269
>>29152274
I am fine with this. LONG LIVE ANALPLUGANON!

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>>29152286
>HE CUMS

>>29152286
You're a sweetheart, Anon.

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>>29152223
>"Nonononono! That won't do!"
>A magic grip yanks your ankle and drags you across the smooth, glass floor.
>"I need my hubby. I need cock. I need cum, and I want to have foals."
>A clipboard flies across the room and smacks into your face, but not hard enough to hurt.
>"I already scheduled your day for you. Those 'better things' can wait.
>You look at the checklist.
>Make pancakes for Twilight.
>Wait in bedroom for Twilight.
>Kiss Twilight.
>Rut Twilight.
>Rut Twilight.
>Rut Twilight.
Are you really sure this is necessary?
>"I'm in HEAT, Anon! If you were in my horseshoes, you'd understand!"
All I understand is that this is bordering on rape.
>"Please. You love it."
>You quickly find yourself in the kitchen.
>Your face is suddenly full of purple.
>"I'm going to shower first. Make them nice and fluffy."
>Her features soften, and her eyes grow a bit more caring, and somewhat apologetic
>"Please?"
>She's too cute to turn down.
Okay.

Twilight is a really boring horse.

>>29152274
> she really just teleported them to Rarity's place to be washed... which she'll do after she spends an hour or two, eyes closed, with your underwear laying over her muzzle
I think I figured out why clothes are lewd in Equestria. The teasingly concealing thing is secondary to the fact that they carry the scent of the body.
Socks for feet
Pants for genitals
Shirts for armpits
Hats for mane
Ponies being so sensitive to scent means that smelling these things is like smelling the body part they cover, with lewd closeness.

>>29152315
...that actually makes a lot of sense.

>>29150778
I though about this a long time ago.
What do you prefer?
Anon gets waifu pregnant.
If it's male, the baby is full human, without visible mutations, no horn, wings or hooves. In other words, no satyrs or anthros, just little quirks, like being able to cast magic, being more light or being more strong.
If it's female, the baby is full waifu race, no mutations visible or human parts, just like quirks too.
No satys or anthros too, just ponies with canines, being able to eat meat and other flora that normal ponies can't.

It could be the solution for all the problems we have with babies in RGRE.

>>29152315
Wearing clothes around town is a signal that you are preparing a little something to remember you by. Wearing clothes is generally a way of saying you are on the market. Hats are traditional, other clothes are increasingly kinky indicators of being sexually available.
Anon walking around in a full suit and tie is almost asking for a gang bang, but nopony believes a stallion would actually be open to that.

>>29152378
Personally, I'd go for female. Her non-human body will just serve to emphasize her human quirks, like her sharper teeth and shameful appetite for meat. Also possibly her ability to eat things like garlic, tomatoes, and potatoes.

>>29152380
It's like a busty girl walking around in hooker clothing, only she's blissfully unaware that her areolas are showing and that everyone can see her clit poking into her ultra-thin barely-there thong. She's just going to the library to return her grandma's overdue books (and is happy to pay the fines for her), and is really confused when people think she's dtf.

>>29151710
CSS is the graphic style of a site. Editing it by adding the portion of code someone posted before allows you to have (You)s back.
4chanX is an addon for browsers that enhances the site under many aspects, and has its own (You) system, independent from the native 4chan one, that cannot be affected by Hiro's changes.

>>29152011
It's not. I found it weird at the beginning too, but give it a few weeks and you'll wonder how you managed to do without it. Just the thread watching system, the filters, and the thread stats always visible without scrolling to top or bottom would be enough to keep using it. The combination of custom CSS with it allows you to customize pretty much everything of 4chan.

>>29152274
MOARRRRR

>>29152378
>just ponies with canines, being able to eat meat and other flora that normal ponies can't.
Yeah, much like Venus. Venus a cute.

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>>29152292
>>29152296
Same one.... i'm sorry? i got something for you.

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>>29152378
>It could be the solution for all the problems we have with babies in RGRE.
no
i dont think so

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>>29152378
None of the above because it's genetically impossible. If your waifu is pregnant, you've been cheated on.

>>29148598
>Kids grow up, but not quite old enough to leave the house yet
>Grow some teenager sass
>Anon and horsewaifu have a massive nestegg from her working and his inventions
>Just waiting for that empty nest
>sitcom shenanigans ensue
>"Uggh, dandelion and cheese AGAIN?"
"Mmhm."
>"Can't I have some money for pizza?"
>You hand the second one her own bag of lunch.
"Nope."
>Groan, exit stage left, third child approaches
>Your son
>Your sweet gayboy horse son
>"Thanks, dad."
>He's going in the will
>Fourth and last child approaches, oldest daughter, the sass master
>"Wow." she remarks with a sneer after peering into her bag, "Peanut butter and jelly, huh? Were you up all morning making that?"
>Horsewaifu frowns at her and offers you a small, weary smile in apology
>You take a big drunk out of your coffee mug
>Swirl it around in your mouth
>Enjoy the taste
>Swallow, then turn back
"No." you reply simply, "I wasn't up all morning making that."
>The kids, even your son, frown at the perceived lame comeback
>Oldest daughter rolls her eyes in triumph
"I was too busy fucking your mom." you say, emphasizing the statement by shoving oldest daughter's backpack into her chest
>Horsewaifu chokes on her coffee
>Offspring are satisfyingly silenced
"Oop -- Bus's here."

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>>29152417
>like her sharper teeth and shameful appetite for meat
>shameful appetite
I want to tease a carnivore poner about her odd habits

>>29152778
Then how do we explain Venus?
Is she and Anon blood-related?
Is Anon a cuck by accepting Venus as her daughter?
Will this make Anon a double cuck now that we know that the baby that he has with Luna is full alicorn too?

That's the same problem we had at the start and at the end of the story.
Nobody wanted to get to that part because is complicated.
And to be frank, i should be working, not thinking about genetics of imaginary cartoon horses.

>>29152378
I like it

>>29152778
take your no fun elsewhere

>>29152781
Ha! I like this Anon.

>>29152781
>"I was too busy fucking your mom."
kek

>>29152378
>>29152778
>>29152821
Genetics? See, the thing is, Equestria already has hybrid species. Griffons and minotaurs are clearly made up of two genetic heritages, yet are still reproductively viable. Moreover, the way they hybridize is clear, with the species manifesting traits above and below the waist. Minotaurs even have a human element mixed with a quadraped livestock element. By that example, humanxpony hybrids would be satyrs with some pony features manifesting on the head, such as horns.

That said, if you like other hybridization schema, that's fun too. I like the idea that humans are one of those mono-gendered species in pony fantasy land, human males using mares to bear their sons, with the daughters having slightly monsterous human traits.

>>29152914
That's assuming that Griffons were born from cats fucking birds or birds fucking cats, and that minotaurs were created from humans fucking cows or vice versa.

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>>29152914
>you will never lay a pegasus and give your children wings
feels bad man

>>29151250
Dots are the new (You).

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>>29152781
>>29152906

>>29152930
No but its a nice thought, also the idea of making comfy times with waifu as your kids slowly grow inside make the emotional dick strong

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>>29153008
I want to cuddle the pregnant waifu.

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>>29152914
>>29152930
>>29152928
So...pic related?

>>29152689
Aww, you shouldn't have. That's going right up in with the others.

>>29152648
>MOARRRRR
>Later tonight. Wink.

>>29152802
There's a penis joke in here somewhere.

>>29152914
>That said, if you like other hybridization schema, that's fun too. I like the idea that humans are one of those mono-gendered species in pony fantasy land, human males using mares to bear their sons, with the daughters having slightly monsterous human traits.
>Anon in MonstergirlQuestria when

>>29153013
I would make her feel weird that I'm paying more attention to her, rather than lose interest now that I've done my job of ensuring an offspring. That's probably not how horses work, but I believe it.

Someanon call for a pathetic cloppy prompt?
> pone genitals don't show up until it is time to get busy
> this always happens in sync cause magic
> first pone that gets him out of his sully clothes (rarity? Purple?) is highly confused why her horsepussy isn't showing when she sees the dong
>something something rgre

I'm a little overwhelmed at the myriad of ways this concept could play out.
I like the idea of it explaining why clothes (specifically those that cover ur junk) are considered lewd. You'd normally only cover yourself thusly when in heat, so waking around like that is announcing that's ur showing. Once pone realizes that anon IS always showing, they agree he should remain clothed but it makes him all the more lewd.

Yes I'm mixing "when a couple is ready" and "when in heat" up. Ffs u expect me to put real effort into this shirt?

Anyway, anon is essentially a Rambling Rose to those that know. This super sexy stallion with an unheard of libido and attitude on sex.

I dunno what I'm saying. I shouldn't post when I'm feeling cloppy.

>>29153089
Yeah...thinking with the dick is pretty difficult.

>>29153082
>There's a penis joke in here somewhere.
All kinds of jokes, lewd and otherwise. Tease her until she gets used to it

>RGREquestria has always had a shortage of males.
>A way to normalize the colt birthrate without adverse effects still hasn't been found.
>Until Equestria finally gets ahold of human genes.
>Everyone is shocked when Anon's waifu gives birth to their 4th son in a row.
>Just having two in an entire family is considered a godsend.
>4 sons in a row is like getting hit by lightning 10 times inside a rubber house.
>Something in the human genome flips the colt birthrate, but the Equestrian scientific community simply cannot pinpoint what.
>Later, Anon gets a vauge summons from the princesses, something about "Saving Equestria from itself" along with some begging for forgiveness for "Giving a male such a tasteless task."
>Not even 2 lines into the letter, and he knows what they want.
>And he's not happy.

>>29153406
Why couldn't I just have two dozen colts with my waifu?

>>29153406
If its sperm samples, I would only be mildly annoyed, if they want kids they gotta get through mama. And papa wont let her back down.

>>29153436
>If its sperm samples, I would only be mildly annoyed
I would flat out say no.

I'm not donating sperm, fuck that noise.

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>>29153013
Love your waifu. Repeatedly. Finishing inside.

>>29153008
and the literal dick too

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>>29153473
oh yes

>>29152315
>>29152359
A+ world building.

>>29152648
>Venus a cute.
truth

>>29152378
Hmm. It's interesting, because in the with real creatures, almost compatible species that make unfertile hybrids (especially the various equines) almost always have dramatic differences depending on sire and dam; so much so they almost always have distinct names. Mules and hinnys, zorses and hebras, etc.
Check out Panthera and you get stuff like ligers, which have gigantism, vs tigons, which look like funny colored tigers.

But they don't tend to have differences based on the gender of the child. Male and female ligers are both giants, for instance.

Anyways, Equestria is a land of magic, with lots of weird chemeric creatures.
There's every reason to believe that their DNA is made up of harmonious sequences of loyalty, laughter, generosity, honesty, and kindness held by links of pure harmony.

There's no canon to go by, so it's kind of silly to act as if some random segment of reality MUST hold true while all of the consequences of that reality are clearly different (eg, DNA and natural creatures in Equestria).

There are plenty of great stories where ponies and anon are interfertile, and plenty where they're incompatible.

>>29153082
>That's probably not how horses work, but I believe it.
Just like humans this can be a personality thing. Since a mare can lose a child just by having sex, some stallions are very hover-y over their mate, making sure no other stallions try to fuck over his legacy. Others apparently feel done once a rut has taken and spend their energy getting other ones pregnant.

>>29153089
I've seen ideas where pony genitals don't exist when they could be seen. They practically have to wear blindfolds to give head. Clothes that cover the crotch are lewd because it mean the genitals are always present.

>>29153563
>There are plenty of great stories where ponies and anon are interfertile, and plenty where they're incompatible.
Ponies and Anon are compatible, but their offspring are sterile.

>>29151287
I haven't read that many myself, so you may've already seen all these suggestions. Some are recent too. But here goes nothing.

Unfinished but probably some of my favorites:
Twilight's Dadanon
http://pastebin.com/4FTQmPf8
(The very short Orphanon by the same author is good too)

Just a Good Ol' Girls
http://pastebin.com/SuSFAc4e
(A bunch of other shorts by the same author are great too. Ruby's Dad Has Got it Going On is great.)

Two Nohooves trash:
Don't Stand So Close to Me
http://pastebin.com/Xn4riUdY

Golden Opportunities
http://pastebin.com/8d6dqhEH

And of course both of those writers have more RGRE.

There are quite a few good writers.
I've heard good things about Cow Tipping from this guy, but you could investigate his other writings:
http://pastebin.com/u/brandnewwritefag

I know I've read at least one green I loved by this guy, and there's some rgre tags in their bin:
http://pastebin.com/u/HeliAnon

I feel like I might be missing a big one, but can't recall right now.

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>Not all ponies have this same level of RGR
>Earth ponies and pegasi both have only little reversed roles mostly in relationships but in other aspects of life they are mostly normal
>Earth ponies less reversed because they value strength and in most communities both gender needed to work during past centuries, because they were doing cheap and physical labour
>Similar with pegasi, thay were the most "warrior" tribe and nowadays most pegasi work with weather so gender isn't really this important
>Unicorns make nobility, and for them the most important thing is magic, so because males don't get as good magic education as females they really can't support themselves
>This is the most prominent in big cities full of nobility like cantrelot

>Anon move to Ponyville before the timeline start, have rather normal life, horsewaifu, maybe some kind of semi-dangerous job like luberjack or blacksmith
>wild Twilight appear
>she's disgusted that male is used like this
>try generously help him by informing princesess and guards about abuse, contacting him with psychologist and things like that
>then she aggresively confront his marefriend about how bad pony she is
>Anon need to help his waifu escape from clutches of obssesive unicorn

Is the thread's pastebins and google doc master lists even maintained anymore? How many stories are just disappearing after they've been written?

>>29153573
>Ponies and Anon are compatible, but their offspring are sterile.

God, that's somehow even sadder than Anon and love not being able to have kids at all.

>>29153625
>Pegasi and Earth ponies are even more RGR because someone minding the home is even more important when one half of the family is out fighting or farming.
>Unicorns are less RGR because magic is an equalizer between genders, as magical strength is not tied to one's sex. But the RGR still exists as an artifact of the past, due to ponykind being slow to change.

Thinking about manga genres...
> Shoujo
A mysterious and prickly mare author hires a young stallion to take care of housekeeping. Over time, the stallion finds more and more about the mare, seeing the small kindnesses and the things the mare cannot handle well. While the stallion does the grocery shopping, a mare the same age hits on him, trying to lead him away. The author mare swoops in angrily, yanking the stallion back home, scolding him for not being cautious.
> Shounen action
Luna's school of battlemagic used to be an all colts school, but recently became coed. Dawn Twinkle is an average unicorn mare with immense potential and a poor upbringing. She struggles with haughty aristocolts, distant honors students, and flirtatious upperclassmen.
> Cute colts do cute things
Four colts bond together, overcoming difficulties in romance, testicle size insecurities, school, and [special interest] club.

>>29153597
>Just a Good Ol' Girls
>Twilight's Dadanon
>Jeff
It was fucking good. hope they update soon.

I'm watching you...

>>29153625
Neat. We need some green of this.

>>29153642
Nyet, I like the other one better.

>>29153658
I read your "Cute Colts" one and all I can envision is FF15

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>>29153640
wow that would hard pretty hard

>>29152299
>>"I'm in HEAT, Anon! If you were in my horseshoes, you'd understand!"
>You deadpan hard
"Twilight, remember those tests you did on me a long time ago?"
>She tries to remember... but fails
>"Anon, I did a lot of tests"
"Remember calling me out on 'I am ready year round'"
>She seems to remember
>"Oh, those tests"
>You look at her
>"So you are ready to go now, perfect"
>You face palm hard
"Not the fucking point twiggy"
>"So Ill take my shower, get those pancakes ready, and when I am done eating we rut on the table"
>Before you can tell her no, she poofs out
>You may love horse pussy
>You may love twilight
>You are half mast right now
>But are able to not fuck her because fuck you twilight I had better shit to do today
>Now that better shit will get done tomorrow and if she interrupts it again, she will be on the couch 2 days in a row...
>She gets to learn a harsh lesson in cause and effect
>She tells you to get in the kitchen and be her dildo, you fuck off and hang out with rarity for the day, maybe sleep over with pinkie

>>29153640
>Congratulations, you thought humans weren't extinct for a couple of years.

>>29153473
>That image.
>"Look momma I'm flying!"
>"That's it kiddo! Remember to keep your arms steady!"
>Biting your hooves to the quick you can only watch in agony as your child flies like a loon.
>You wouldn't want to deny her, her heritage, but oh goodness her form is all over the place!
>Not to mention you don't think humans were meant to fly...
>Though from the way Anon keeps shouting out praise and tips on how to fly you're left wondering.
>OH GOSH SHE'S GOING TO HIT THE TREE!
>You about take off but stall as your darling girl manages to peel away only ruffling leaves and making the tree sway from her passing.
>You're going to wind up as grey as Mayor Mare at this rate...

>>29153625
>Twilight is fully aware that throwing Anon's marefriend into the dungeons/getting her arrested on false charges is morally reprehensible
>One of the first things she learned to prepare herself for making friends in Ponyville is that just because ponies do something you don't approve of, doesn't mean that they're wrong
>Decides that the only way to "free" Anon is to be a better mare than his marefriend and win him over

>"D-Don't worry, foal!"
>Twilight nuzzles your thigh, doing her best to hold her tears back.
>"I'll be back soon! J-Just keep being b-brave for me, okay?"
>Anon shrugs and goes back to work
>He's sure this will blow over soon.
>Who even WAS that, anyway?

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>>29153743
She already is as gray as Mayor Mare

>>29153743
Poor Flutterbutter, Dash is helping Anon and his kids learn how to fly like a dad. Just sitting on a chair and watching while drinking a beer and shouting vague encouragement.

>>29153745
Kek, does Twilight follow them around town while Anon and waifu do their daily shenaegains?

>>29153625
>"Shh!"
>Twilight strokes your face with a hoof.
>You'd try and shy away from her touch, but you're a little tied up right now.
>HAH!
>No, you are literally tied up right now. Like, with rope.
>"Shhh.... shh-shh-shhh.... I-it's alright now, Anon. The bad mare can't hurt you any more; not while you're here, safe in my basement."
>Twilight's eye twitches and she struggles to hold back a giggle.
>You're going to die down here, aren't you?

>>29153767
She does. If they go to a restaurant, Twilight will order more expensive versions of what Anon's waifu orders.

>>29153754
>Mayor Mare has a dye job
>Think the gray hair makes her look more experienced

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>>29153743
Stress overload.

>>29153778
Anon proceeds to not notice what she's doing and ignores her, then when the conversation slips to Twilight Anon drops the question, "you mean that mare eating by herself over near-X, she must be kinda fat". Then keeps on talking like nothing happened. Twilight is a confused poner and cant imagine why he would think that as she shovels Hayburgers down her gullet.

>>29153743
>She
Um... Comfy... Timber's a boy.

>>29153802
I don't think he really cares about satyr thread's canon.

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>>29153642
>I rather think that among Pegasi we have something like among vikings or some evolution of ancient roman laws, beside if pegasi fought a lot, gender ratio was balanced becase mares simply died during wars, like in ancient arabian countries and their polygamy just reversed
>with earth ponies it's even simpler when mare is pregnant someone still need to tend to crops, of course sometimes there are other mares in herd but sometimes not, also the physically stronger atallions were really valuable at farms, hell, women often worked at farms even when they are weaker than men
>and among unicorns without proper magic education you don't have much in the field of magic and in places like Cantrelot, close to princess and in noble families (Twilight) reversed roles are strongest, among the highest class of pony society msres want to remain in status quo (like among magnates or in oligarhy) and don't allow stallions to have to much power

>>29153802
We are not talking about that shit heap thread and its cancer OCs. I cant tell in the image who it is so it can be anyone.

>>29153815
I'm sorry what?
https://derpibooru.org/tags/oc-colon-timber
Also check tags.
https://derpibooru.org/546913

>>29153817
>>and among unicorns without proper magic education you don't have much in the field of magic and in places like Cantrelot, close to princess and in noble families (Twilight) reversed roles are strongest, among the highest class of pony society msres want to remain in status quo (like among magnates or in oligarhy) and don't allow stallions to have to much power
A unicorn without magical education would be worthless, even less useful than an earth pony. Thus it is fucking stupid that they would not teach every single unicorn to use their magic. And given that it is not something that requires one-on-one teaching, and something that *can* be taught en-masse, then it would also be fucking stupid to not just put the males with the females in the classes. There are not so many that it cannot be done.

>>29153826
Stop.

>>29153826
>He's got a horse cock
>Half human Half Pony
Why are you doing this?

Why you gotta ruin the fun?

>>29153815
This. The satyr thread is cancer.

>>29153826
Which part of >>29153818 did you not understand?

>>29153815
thats a rather feminine boy...

>>29153625
>Anon is good friends with some mare
>They aren't together
>Enter Twilight
>With her view on gender roles, she can't help but see their behaviour as intimate and familiar
>Is disgusted when she sees that his "marefriend" let him get a dangerous job
>What if he gets hurt?!
>Is shocked when his "marefriend" playfully punches Anon on the shoulder
>Like in >>29153745, Twilight decides to try and win Anon over to free him from his clearly abusive relationship
>Meanwhile, Anon is ignorant to all this
>Suddenly, a tiny purple unicorn is trying to attract his attention
>Anon and Twilight end up becoming a couple naturally
>It isn't until a number of months together that Twilight brings up taking action against his "abusive ex-marefriend"

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>>29153827
Not without any magic education. Without expert level magic education. It's like saying that a human without university level knowledge cannot tie his shoes or pay the taxes. It's just the most prestigious and well paying jobs require that "mare-only" kind of education, aka not telekinesis.
Pic unrelated

>>29153854
He look like a prince to me

>>29153745
It's good but I think that early, socially inept Twilight would rather go full warmonger, maybe not to the point of throwing marefriend into dungeon but rather some kind of intervention or constantly spying to make sure that everything is ok
"A ha, I knew it, you put love potion into his coffe"
"What? You feed him with meat? You cruel monter"
"Did you just wear socks to tempt this poor colt? You truly are whorse"

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>>29153864
>He look like a prince to me

>>29153854
Satyr thread is halfway to homohorse 2.0 so it's no surprise.

>>29153855
Kek, that sounds pretty fun.

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>>29153872
This. We're talking fresh out of the Canterlot complete sperg librarian Twilight, not the winged version 6 seasons down the line.

>>29153826
>You're timber
>"GET BACK HERE AND BUCK ME!"
>"S-STOP! SIR!"
>"PLEASE! I JUST WANT TO KNOW YOU!"
>"COME OVER HERE!"
>Right now you're running away

>>29153745
Ya smell that? THE SMELL OF THE DA DA DA DA Twilight Neigh.

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>>29153894

>You are Anon
>You just brought few rabbits from the Everfree and are drinking your tea
>Some ponies may frown at you but considering prices of meat in Ponyland, all four griffon living in Cantrelot buy it from you
>You hear some noise from your storage-freezer room
>This purple unicorn stole your meat
>Again
>fuck
>You should probably go help your marefriend before little thief start harrasing her
>Again
>Last time she put your boar corpse in her bathtub and started questioning her why she torture this poor stallion like that
>You still can't understand what this all is about but your bits just disappeared
>Looks like your marefriend is paing for lunch
>Again

>>29153970
>taking anons bits
>taking anons meat
>harassing anons marefriend

cuntpunt inbound.

>>29153827
This. Stallion can be scribe or shop assistant but not profesor or excellent artist

>>29153970
thats theft
which is against the law
which is a call to the guard station

>>29153983
>And on that day Anon realised that the nearest guard post is in Canterlot

>>29153976
I don't mean this like Twilight being some kind of Ponyville pseudo-villain but rather she was raised in such that she thinks thats she's helping poor Anon.

>>29153987
that doesnt make it any better, just because she thinks ahes helpin poor old anon doesnt mean she is. or that she isnt braking the law.

>>29153987
Not only twilight... every pony.

>>29151197
>The newly crowned Princess Purplesmart needs her own guards
>Celestia insisted on it.
>She sold it as tradition and just part of being a princess
>But the real reason was that mare was just a magnet for trouble of all kinds
>Despite beating her mentor in raw magical might, she just wasn't experienced enough to get away with having no guards.
>There were plenty dangers out there that lurked in the dark corners of the world, both mundane and otherwise.
>Celestia (and Luna) had tangled with many of them over the millennia, and knew that Twilight was more vulnerable than she realized

>Enter Guard Anon
>An unusual guard, for an unusual princess facing unusual threats.

>>29153625
Let me give it a shot:
Earth Ponies-Light RGR
>all earth ponies are expected to be able to work, clean, and cook
>the main difference is that the stallions do the shopping and handle finances while the mares make the rules
>due to social influences from the more RGR races modern earth stallions are more inclined to acting as househusbands

Pegasi-Mid RGR
>being bulkier, stallions were on average slower and clumsier fliers, making them less capable of manipulating weather and more likely to fall through the clouds, as such they were expected to stay in their homes
>their physical strength was not of tremendous importance when most things in pegasus society are light-weight, but respected whenever they had to fight or work with earthly material

Unicorns- high RGR
>unicorn colt's are usually physically frail and tend to have breathing problem
>often they are stillborn
>despite usually growing in to strong and capable adults, this combined with a slightly lesser capability in magic than mares lead to unicorn society becoming very protective of them

Zebras-full retard RGR
>during the early ages of the zebras, the tribes were visited by an entity that called itself the monkey king
>said monkey king was the fist human to arrive in equis, a /pol/ack who decided to mess with them for fun
>he declared that all zebra males should speak in rhyme, and that all mares should brag about their huge rears, talk in ebonics and give their children dumb names
>not being particularly fluent in ancient Zebrican, he got the genders mixed up.
>he spent centuries pulling other such pranks on the races of Equis before settling down in a giant temple with his Orangutan wives.

>>29154137
>>unicorn colt's are usually physically frail and tend to have breathing problem
>>often they are stillborn
that got sad quick

>>29154108
Guard anon engages attackers by snuggling them till they don't feel like fighting anymore

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>>29154137

>>29154137
Or maybe different pony races have different gender ratio. Pegasi and Earth ponies 1:2/3 and unicorns 1:4/5.
And breeding beetwen tribes was frowned because it led to many genetical problems.

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>>29154195
>You're faggot.jpg

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>>29154137
>>>during the early ages of the zebras, the tribes were visited by an entity that called itself the monkey king
Even in modern times his children like to fling shit at filthy ziggers.

>Sexual predator in equestria when?

>Silly Twilight, stallions can't rape mares!

>>29153406
But the entire premise falls apart when Anon doesn't have a shit tier waifu and is boinking Celestia or Luna.

I suppose it'd be preserved if he's with Fleur, though.

>Rather than the usual 'Celestia and Luna are sad that stallions are such pansies today' trope that gets used in RGRE, it was even more extreme back in their day and the present is actually super progressive compared to it

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>>29153573
>>29153640
>Satyrs can also breed but only with eachother.
Anon has to breed with at least 256 diferent beings to ensure a viable genepool

>>29154412
That Smug Celestia

> Anon gets adopted by Granny Smith as an adult because the younguns need a stallion to keep them in line
> This technically makes him their uncle, but Applebloom likes to call him Pa
> Anon isn't really sure what he's supposed to be doing, so he just helps around the house and mentors the Apple orphans as best he can
> Helps Big Mac with his fine motor control and massages the knots out of his withers
> Applejack consults him about stallion troubles, and he helps her train for competitions
> Applebloom regularly confuses him for a tree, when not begging for help making this new dessert Sweetie told her about
> The ponies in town find this all heart warming
> If only there was some well mannered mare to keep him company...

>>29154390
>Big Mac got a lot of attention for his resistance to what "stallions were supposed to be like" when he was younger
>Too much attention
>It's part of why he's so reclusive now.

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>>29154412

>nopony ever sees that, right?

>>29154176
Tactical combat snuggles?

>>29154420
>If only there was some well mannered mare to keep him company...
>It turns out that him and Applejack were actually fucking
>We're not related, so it'll be okay.

>>29154302
This.

>>29154442
Kek, that's kinda hot, does Dash drop by so it isn't weird and gives Anon a double team?

>>29154412
That Luna is very pretty.

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>>29154137
Yeah, sure, fuck it, I'll accept this until somebody can prove otherwise. Nicely done, Anon. The differences in pony physiology and how it relates to gender roles was well thought out.

>>29154390
>"You think this is bad, Anonymous?"
>Celestia punches you in the shoulder and laughs.
>Big belly laughs.
>"This is the part where we throw our heads back and laugh" laughs.
>"Whoo!"
>Celestia recovers and wipes a tear from her eyes, her body still quaking with the aftershocks of her mirth.
>"Anonymous, when I was a filly, you didn't even bother teaching stallions how to read."
>She shrugs impassively at your incredulous look.
>"Ponies just thought it was a waste. If they weren't allowed out of the house - unless it was to either plow the fields or go to a church for their wedding - then why put the time an energy into teaching one anything useful?"
>She rolls her eyes and pours you and herself another drink.
>"For the Old One's sake, Anonymous, we weren't even sure that stallions were sapient at the time."
>Jesus
"Sounds awful."
>Celestia downs her drink and reaches for the bottle.
>"You have no idea."
>She burps and covers her mouth with a hoof.
>"Colts really have no idea how good they have it. 'Misandry' indeed."

>>29154412
Why does Cadence look so ragged in that picture?
>"No, Anon, quit being a pussy. I can handle meth."

>>29154412
I wonder how their expressions (and thus their attitudes) translate to RGRE
>Celestia: smug
>Luna: happy & bashful
>Cadence: content
>Shining: his happiness and optimism: gone

Maybe Luna has a crush or something, and Celestia is just happy to have broken her dry spell with somebody who lasts longer than 15 seconds?

>>29154442
>>29154484
>Familial bonds are strong in Equestria
>If you adopt a foal, then that foal is regarded as though it were your blood-related child; even if that foal is a completely different species than you are

>Applejack and Anon fuck in the barn
>Applejack gets off on the taboo (despite being unrelated, a completely different species, and neighbors for 2 years)
>Anon just likes fucking horses
>Rainbow Dash comes by and sees them fucking; is horrified and disgusted
>"What if you get mutated foals!?"
Logic was never a pony's strong suit.

>>29154759
I would say Dash is just being an idiot in this situation, not just everyone would be grossed out at this.

>>29154390
>>Rather than the usual 'Celestia and Luna are sad that stallions are such pansies today' trope that gets used in RGRE

Oh, is that common? Darn.
I felt kind of clever planning a bit where Twilight complains to Luna about changing social customs regarding stallions, how she thinks the progressive attitude is a bad one. And Luna bitches her out, saying that the whole "keep them in the kitchens" thing is a modern perversion to her perceptions. In her day Equestria wasn't stable, it was still subject to invasion and large scale magical beast attacks, so large, strong, aggressive stallions were always in the front lines, and by god did the mares around them fight twice as hard to protect them.
It's a bit like how modern perception of gays is that they're limp wristed and prissy, compared to the Thebes Sacred Band being one of the most feared fighting forces.

>>29154420
>Anon tries to teach Mac to stand up for himself
>Mac takes this advice and joins stallionists
>Anon finds Mac doing something inappropriate
>Taps him on the shoulder
>"We're going home."
>The walk back to the farm is dead silent
>Mac is sweating buckets
>Anon sits him down
>Mac expects Anon to yell at him
>Anon just sighs
>"I'm sorry, Mac. When you all accepted me into this family, I knew that it was my responsibility to try to impart some knowledge and wisdom, and just try to do some good. Clearly, I didn't do it very well."
>Anon goes BEYOND the "I'm not angry; I'm just disappointed" parental attitude
>Big Mac cries himself to sleep that night

>>29154822
I actually really want to see Anon being a mix of Earth-dad and RGRE-dad.

>Can be his foal's rock and is there whenever they need him
>Can also make his foals feel horrible without ever saying a word

I'm sort of picturing Anon waiting up for his teenaged foal to come home at 2 in the morning, wearing an old ratty bathrobe and hair curlers.

>>29154856
>>Can be his foal's rock and is there whenever they need him
>>Can also make his foals feel horrible without ever saying a word
Nigga, that's just called being a dad.

>>29154856
>and hair curlers
....Why, did Anon want to have a joke for himself by dressing as trailer trash?

>>29154876
My older siblings never did any of that shit, so I'm basing my knowledge off of 90's cartoons.

>>29154873
....O-Oh, right. Y-yeah, my dad did things like that all the t-time.

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>>29154856

>>29154780
its not common at all in practice, just in that everyone likes to imagine celestia and luna as being from a far less rgre time, shit changed and now it's basicly modern feminism.

Few people go this way or even write the rulers at all in a more than one 4 line post meaningful way.

From the last thread

>>Her horn spirals clockwise instead of counter-clockwise
>>Her cutie mark is a full two inches lower down on her flank than it should be
>>She is the equivalent of that ugly kid you knew whose eyes are just slightly too far apart and it's really weird on an unconscious/subconscious level

>Anon gets a herd of antisocial mares that he thinks are absolute babes
>The mares who are 'that ugly/fat creepy guy' in our world are super grateful

Mixed with this >>29154944

The cringey beta guys who wear fedoras, flameshirts and spout off the edgiest things ever.

Anon thinks their pony equivalences are awesome.

>"Whoa, you can really conjure up black fire with your magic?!"

>>29154774
>Dash is just being an idiot
And all was right in the world

>>29155105
>>"Whoa, you can really conjure up black fire with your magic?!"
You know what? I'd let a pony in my pants if they could do that. It isn't cringey if they can actually do it in real life.

>RGRE universe where all ponies are land-based deep-sea fishes
>Unicorns have that light thing that some deep-sea fish have
>Earth ponies are like goblin sharks
>Pegasi are one of those scary fish with the needle-teeth
>Something something RGRE
Make it happen, Cap'n.

Noticed something. Most siblings in the show have a significant age difference.

Rarity and Sweetie
All three Appuls (Big Mac is several years older than AJ, and AJ is significantly older than Bloom).
Twiggles and Shining Armor

The only exceptions seem to be actual twins (Flitter and Cloudchaser, the Spa Ponies, The Cake Twins) and the Pie Sisters (and Pinkie and Marble are supposed to be twins as well IIRC)

I wonder why the long gaps between kids in most cases?

>>29155324
It's all to produce a psychological gap between siblings. You ever hear of the whole, "Type A, B, C" personality things? The last-born child is typically a type C. But if there's a significant gap between births of second-to-last child and last child, then the last-born child's personality is more likely to be a type A. It's all about diversifying things and making sure that one family isn't full of a bunch of assholes.

>>29155215
Not to us, but in their world it might be.

>"Did Anon seriously let that mare with the serpent sword collection join his herd? Her wings have a different hue towards the tips! Urgh, I thought he had taste!"

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>>29155361
>Her wings have a different hue towards the tips
I would.

>>29155361
I'd put out in a SECOND. I won't lie, Anon, I'd be a really huge slut if I were in RGRE.

>>29155105
>You are now thinking of that (adorable) picture of Rarity with a chode horn

>>29155403
Bleh, tiny horn.

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>>29155397
I'd grab a single mare and make her the happiest she's ever been.

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>Be Anon
>Sitting on your couch and watching pony tv after a long day of selling horseshoes
>Damn stallions are fucking picky and retarded
>Hand tucked into your pants you flip the channel to catch the new episode of MLH
>Sure the show is inane drivel but damn if it doesn't have some waifu's in it.
>Just as the show starts you hear a knock at the door
>Cursing you stomp your way over and throw it wide
>You are about to call them on interrupting your show when you notice its your marefriend Rainbow Dash
>And on her back is a literal MOUND of pillows and blankets
"Uhh...whats up Dashie?"
>She stares at you expectantly for a few seconds before rolling her eyes and marching off to your living room
>You stand there stunned and try to think of a time that Dash has ever not talked constantly around you
>Before you can come up with an answer you hear furniture being scraped across the floor
>You rush in and see that in the minute she has been out of your view your living room has been...transformed
>The couch has been pushed back and a thick comforter layed down
>A wall of pillows and blankets form a circular area between the TV and the couch
>The later of which has been covered in tons of pillows
>Dash looks up from where she is smoothing out the floor and gives you an almost bashful grin
>She spreads her wings and chirps at you a few times
>You just stare at her with a confused look on your face
>She lays down in the middle of the pillow fort with her belly facing you and turns her head away from you
"Uhh Dash. This has to be the most adorable thing I have ever seen but I have no idea what you are trying to tell me.
>She looks up at you irritated
>"Anon how dense are you?! Its a nest! I made you a nest."
"And why would I need a nest?"
>She puffs her cheeks out in anger
>She flies over to you and gets right up in your face
>"Because I'm pregnant you numbskull! See a nest! Don't you humans know anything?"
>Your eyes go wide as her words hit you
"Oh."

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>>29155409
>The chubby, greasy shut-in mare who is on 4pone all day.
>Half the time she's on /pol/ or /mlh/.
>You will never slowly pull her out of her bitter shell.
>You will never steadily work her into being more social without losing what makes her unique.
>You will never motivate her (sometimes with sex) into exercising and being healthy.
>You will never be in the background of her smug OP pic when she makes her last ever thread on /r9pone/ titled "See you never, dykes >Tfw 10/10 not-slut bf"
>You will never take a mare who would have died bitter and alone and turn her life around with your love and care.

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>>29155509

"Oh shit."
>You can see the look of aggravation turn to one of fear and anger
>She starts to pull back from you but you pluck her out of the air and hold her close
>Your mind is going a mile a minute but one thought is at the front
>You dont want to hurt her
>"Lemme go!"
"No. I'm not letting you go Dashie."
>She valiantly struggles against you but you know her heart isn't in it.
"Damn it Dash hold still. Remember when we first met and you had to explain that all those mares were hitting on me?"
>You feel her nod against your chest
"Remember when you kept posing in front of me to show that you were interested in me and I had no idea what that meant?"
>She hesitates and nods again
"This is like those times. A nest doesn't really mean anything to humans. Its one of those differences between us."
>She looks up from your chest and you can see the tears in her eyes
>"It doesn't matter. I saw the look on your face Anon. I can tell you are a upset that I am pregnant."
>You rap your knuckles against her head hard enough to make her wince
"Yes it does matter you feather-brain! I was shocked. I didn't think you COULD get pregnant from me."
>You lean down and kiss the tip of her nose
"There is no mare I would rather have a child with."
>You gently set her down on the couch
>She goes to protest and you quickly swoop in for a kiss shutting her up
"Sit right here for a second. I will be right back."
>You rush out of the room and grab something from your sock drawer
>When you get back she is exactly where you left her
"Right...well I meant to save this until a better moment but I want you to understand how I feel."
>Kneeling in front of her you pull the box out from behind your back and open it
"I know its typically the mare who does it here but from where I am from its the man who proposes."
>She freezes and here eyes widen
>From the box you bring out a simple necklace

>>29155312
You know how crabs just take their legs off, like they're all "Yeah, I don't need this any more"?
Seaquestria RGRE is like that too.
>"Whoops!"
>Twilight accidentally drops something heavy on her leg
>It makes a horrible, not-soft-leg cracking sound
>"Darn!"
>She lights up her horn and rips her leg off
>She notices your horrified look and smiles comfortingly.
>"It'll come back next time I shed my shell, Anon."

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>>29155521
>A gold chain with two hands cupped around Dash's cutie mark
"So Dashie...Will you horse marry me?"
>She throws her hooves around your shoulders and kisses you deeply
>After what seems like hours you two finally break the kiss
>"Of course I will dummy."
>She almost gasps it out

>Several hours later
>Dash has explained to you about nest building signalling pregnancy
>You kept calling dash adorable until she shut you up with kisses
>She decided to show you how marely she was
>Currently and Dash are snuggled up together in her nest
>Shit was cozy as fuck
>Especially after you got naked
>You are both laying there while you stroked her hair lovingly
>"You know Anon this wont do."
>You frown at her
"What?"
>"I cant have you out mare me. You know I am gonna have to propose to you before we can tell anyone."
>You roll your eyes
>These ponies
>Bringing your hand down to her belly you let it rest there
>Dash is pregnant with your child and she agreed to marry you
>By all rights you should still be freaking out about it
>Yet all you can do when you think about it is smile
>You lean forward and whisper in her ear
"I love you Dash."
>You feel her shiver against you
>"I love you too you big monkey."


look guys I made a thing

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>>29155537
MOM DASH
BEST DASH

>>29155409
This book ego-strokes men

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>>29155537

It was a good thing. Very cute.

>>29155384
I like her, She didn't blink.

>>29155509
>"Where else will I lay my eggs?"

>>29155537
Is good thing, much like. Chirping pegasus is hnnngggg, nest top comf.
The necklace is an interesting proposal item, but it makes sense that it would stay on the easiest of all jewelry.

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>>29155514
That sounds nice.

>>29155514
>She will never experimentally try to give you oral
>She will never start by spending a solid thirty seconds with her nose pressed up against your junk, smelling you

>>29155573
>didn't blink
What the fuck man. Just because she blind that not mean she can't see.

>>29155514
MAKE IT HAPPEN! We need 4pone 12/30/2016
New Year!

>>29155597
... uh, yes. That's what being blind is.

>>29155521
>You will never shock your mare by proposing before she does
Seriously, we don't have enough stories where pone-waifu proposes to Anon. I thought that was the most staunchly held male-exclusive thing there ever was.

>>29155537
You are great. You should stick around and write more.

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>>29155537
yes

>>29155573
what

>>29155610
>Appul wants to propose
>Being an Appul, she's old fashioned
>Keeps getting mentally stuck at the part where she's supposed to ask his Mother's permission first

>Sirens have the attention span of a goldfish.
>After snatching him from the beach they forgot why they brought him back to their colony.
>They just assume he came willingly.

It actually explains why they tried to take over the school after Sunset's attempt failed
>"Why do we have a male here, anyway?"
>>"I dunno. A mate, maybe?"
>"Naw. He's way too cute for that. Maybe he just... followed us home?"
That's actually not a bad lead-up to "Anon in RGREqG and also Sirens"

>>29155669
Please ignore how the sirens have been there for thousands of years. I don't watch the movies and I don't intend to start now.

>>29155659
>Appul gets pregnant before getting horse married
>Now has to find a Mare to adopt Anon and then pull a shotgun on her to force them to marry

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>>29155537
Shockingly maternal Dash > Smug mom Dash

>>29155659
>>29155679
I love this. Perfect lateral thinking solution.
>Dear Princess Celestia
>I know I don't write you often. I'm sorry, but I have so little to learn about friendship.
>I hope your nation running and sun raising is going well for you.
>My apple crop this year was quite bountiful, praise you.
>Anyways, I was wondering if you would mind adopting my coltfriend and then giving me his hand in marriage.
>Thanks in advance.
>Yours Honestly,
>Applejack

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>>29155558
>>29155571
>>29155620
>>29155629
>>29155701
Glad you guys like thing. I will continue to make more things for you guys.

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You are the little spoon.

>>29155686
Granny Smith would be more than willing to step in for Anon's absent Mother.

Ain't no Grandaughter o' hers gonna shack up with a stallion and have a foal without getting hitched. Just ain't the way Apple's does things.

>>29155702
Dear appul

Fuck off he's my horsebando.

>>29155702
kek
>Celestia walks a confused and bemused Anon down the isle to give him away to the bride

I like to think that the groom outfit is basically a tux, only a bit more dainty. Not faggy, but more close to Victorian-era clothes, where frills around the wrists were more common.

>>29155720
It's also just like the Apples to marry their adopted siblings.

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>>29155717
Best.

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>>29155702
>Dearest Applejack
>It's wonderful to heat from you
>I am very happy to hear that your farm is doing well
>If you touch my man I'll do things to you that are illegal in every civilized nation in the world
>Please tell your grandmother that I said hello
>Iwillfuckinggutyou
>Yours truly,
>Princess Celestia Solare, Lady of the Sun, Ruler of Equestria, Ten-Time Pie Eating Champion

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>>29155701
Why not both? She can be shockingly maternal to her foals and terribly smug to her friends at the same time.

Just a thought, but we've had the story of love at first sight being a thing for ponies along with the whole song and dance number.

So what happens when we have Anon being swept up along with the love at first sight magic that reacts with him? I'm thinking something along the lines of either heartfelt devotion or just a small nuclear orgy of sexual energy that turns everyone omnisexual and makes Cadence stiffen all the way from the Empire.

>>29155774
>Dear Applejack, holder of the Element of Honesty
>Do you have experience eating pussy?
>Let me know.
>
>No homo,
>Princess Celestia

>>29155537
I wonder if dock rings count as proposal rings?

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>>29155701
J-JUST YOU WAIT GUYS

DASHIE IS JUST PRETENDING

SHE'LL BE THE HERO OF THE ARC

>>29155778
>Brags about their accomplishments
>Brags about how her body bounced back from the multiple pregnancies
>Threatens to gut you if you even look at her foals wrong

>>29155778
It comes off as pretty fucking mean.
>enjoy dying alone losers, you'll never know a love like mine
Just makes Dash look needlessly cruel.

>>29155774
>"Anonymous, in order to foster a positive relationship between our peoples in the event contact is reestablished with your world, I feel that we should get married."
"Isn't that normally what leaders and royals do? I was literally nobody back home."
>"But you're certainly a prince to me, Anon~"

>>29155837
>Celestia absolutely means every single word

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>>29155837
>>29155843
Yes. YES.

>>29155832
What? No, smug at the fact that she was the FIRST and the FASTEST one of the group to have foals, constantly poking and prodding at them to hurry up and get foals of their own already so hers have playmates, etc.

>>29155789
>Anon was just going to town to pick up some fruit for a fruit salad
>When his eyes met a flower vendors eyes he was frozen in place
>A wonderful horrible alien feeling ran through his body
>He suddenly was filled with the desire to sweep this mare off her feet and carry him home with her before making sweet love in the missionary position for the purpose of procreation
>Judging by the blush on her face she feels similar
>He comes to eight hours later laying in a bed next to the mare covered in fluids
>He has vague memories of what happened in between but there is no lingering feeling of love
>Just a sudden feeling of despair like he lost something dear to him

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>>29155717

That would be a good thing.

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>>29155870
That would be fine if it was just AJ, who has gotten to turn down thirsty as fuck stallions, but the rest?
>Nerdvirgin Twilight
>weeb FlutterNEET
>shot down hard by every crush Rarity
>literally caused her to fuck with the timeline out of despair Glimmer

There is no way Rainbow can be smug about her relationship to those poners without emotionally torturing them.

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>>29155895
>>He has vague memories of what happened in between but there is no lingering feeling of love
>>Just a sudden feeling of despair like he lost something dear to him

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>>29155895
>>He has vague memories of what happened in between but there is no lingering feeling of love
>>Just a sudden feeling of despair like he lost something dear to him
no
You're a bad person, Anon. I mean it.

>>29155608
You can be legally blind but not totally blind. Dumbass.

>>29154420
Wait, why does Anon needs to be adopted?
Maybe he gets accepted by Granny to help the farm.
Maybe he gets in the family between young and normal Applejack.
...
No, fuck it.
The question here is:
Would you fuck Granny Smith and become Grandpa Anon?
Maybe putting a new pie in the oven?

>>29155895
Exactly. Magic wouldn't have a lasting effect on Anon. If it had any effect at all to begin with.

>>29156009
>>29155946
I guess you dont like bad ends?
>>29156039
I just like the idea that magic doesn't always work on anon as intended. Like his body isn't wired right but the general effect does get through.

>>29156039
>>29156057
So that could be a story, like okay so the intial effect takes over, but because of lack of magic circuits or any other organ for Anon to hold that charge aside from his brain, it just goes away after a while.

However this would peak Anon's interest in said mare and he would through hard work and preserverance manage to hold onto this relationship that just dropped in his lap.

depending on how the writer takes it, it could go with a drama of Anon and waifu struggling to make it work because waifu expects the love of magic to take over for certain everyday things like getting used to each other's habits and quirks. Or something like a bit of comedy by having Anon going off and building a harem/finding the rest of his herd via this single love look type thing that happened. Now it becomes a competition to see whose alpha mare material amongst all the mares that he found.

Too much? Too silly?

>>29156083
Or Anon just randomly gets the Love and First Sight bullshit happening to him. Losing control of his faculties because of "fate" or some garbage.

>>29155946
>>29156009
>>29156039
>>29156057


> Cadence makes an emergency house call
> It seems Anon can be affected by magic, but his natural dissipation rate is far higher than any pony
> He has to wear a love crystal crystal pendent, to keep the magic circulating though his system
> It's a bit like a pacemaker, but for emotional balance
> Anon and flower vendor pone move to the Crystal Empire, where the ambient love magic levels are higher, and Anon doesn't have to get his crystal charged every month
> They are a little sad to leave their Ponyville friends behind, but Anon and waifu can live together in true love

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>>29155934
>a literal princess
>a literal model
>simply has shit taste in stallions
>went crazy over her first friend and made no attempts otherwise

>>29156083
Personally I would go

>Anon basically got magic raped
>realizes its not the mares fault
>Tries to make it work with her
>Mare is desperate to make it work as she is head over hooves for him
>cue dating and romance
>they eventually have a fight and she decides that she cares more about him being happy than her being happy and leaves him so he can live his life as he wants
>Anon realizes he was so used to having her around that now that she is gone he feels empty
>They hook back up and stay together

>>29156091
nigga if you NEED magic to stay in love than its not love. ITS FUCKING MAGIC MINDRAPE.

>>29155946
>>29156009
I don't get it.

Why the sudden feeling of despair?

>>29156131
He felt true love, and lost it.

>>29156138
Ah, it all makes sense now.

>Anon's interactions with the background magic of Equestria can be...strange
>Unpredictable
>And to Twilight's frustration, it changes as time goes by
>She nearly drives herself mad trying to figure out the pattern
>When 'love' magic starts getting involved, she gets Cadence in on her research

>It takes a while, but they eventually find out some things.
>Firstly, much to Twiggles satisfaction: Friendship really was Magic, even for Anon.
>As he became less of a loner, and actually became friends with ponies (and other species if applicable) magic began to affect him more "normally"

>Though it still wasn't a sure thing
>Much to Discord's glee: even at Anon's most predictable, there was still that element of chaos
>You just never knew for sure what was going to happen...

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>>29156131
Imagine meeting someone and feeling an unbelievably deep emotional bond. Like soulmates level bond.

Now imagine having that ripped away suddenly and it all seem like a fever dream.

>>29156057
I don't like bad ends, Anon. I come here for happy feelings and to escape reality.

>>29156150
>Imagine meeting someone and feeling an unbelievably deep emotional bond. Like soulmates level bond.
I don't think it's possible for me to feel those feels senpai.
I'm an apathetic emotional black hole.

>>29156121
> Elemental, spontaneous magic matches highly compatible beings into mating pairs
> Skips all the pain and uncertainty of dating, being rejected, and wondering if you really love someone
> ...
> Magic mind rape
It's not like you have much control over who you love in the first place, you may as well call normal love "chemical mind rape".

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>>29156118
>Its not like Celestia and Luna are beating them off with a stick
>Who hated every second of the attention she received
>Can't help what gets your clit hard
>Has never looked at another stallion except her husbando

None of them would bee too out of place on /r9k/

>>29156091
As long as it's a "this is how things are supposed to work and Anon is just a magical vacuum" and less of a "let's drug him up" thing, then I'm down to clown with that. Like, if the magical pendant works as an anti-depressant, and Anon is still in full control of his facilities.

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Hey Ephemeral if you are reading this, I just want to say I really like how your story is coming along both in its theme and content and its really nice to see a writefag juggle a couple of plots at once without ruining one for the other.

Also Im not sure if the lineage idea was yours but if so well done it was very immersive and adds a real good flavour to your story

>>29156171
Celestia and Luna are also over a thousand years old and likely no longer want to bear the pain of losing lover after lover to time.

>>29156160
Well refer to my story >>29155509 for happy end.

Any magic that fucks with Anon leads to a bad end
>>29156169
Brain chemistry love is internal. Magic is an external force that can be forced on you as seen through Cadance.

>>29156183
That is only an issue if the reciprocate, there hasn't been a single story here where there are stallions pining for the attentions of the princesses without ulterior motives.

I'm going to say this right now.

I'm super down for "love at first sight" magic taking hold as long as it's a "I've found what I'm missing" thing and not a "MAGIC SAYS YOU LOVE THIS HORSE NOW".

The concept of soulmates makes my heart hurt in a good way.

>>29156202
That's because every single story has been self insertion wish fulfillment.

You should know this.

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>>29156225
Well, yeah. I mean, the entire premise is "Author/reader-insert character suddenly is competent and all the girls like him". It's about as unrealistic as you can get amirite AHAHHHahh

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>>29156225
Well then even more to the point, what are those poor mares going to do without HMD?
And what kind of cruel monster would mock them for that?

>mfw I realize that this line of thought is exactly why herding became a thing.

>>29156238
Pretty much.

The immortal goddess rulers of an entire nation most likely aren't going to be too romantically interested in you. Or any of us.

>>29156259
Let me have this; I have so little.

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>>29150732
>hold your horses

>>29156279
Saying this right now: Perfect pone size. You can hold them and cuddle them and you can't actually enter any of their buildings because the roofs all come up to about your chest.

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>>29156294
Yes.

>>29156183
>>29156259
> Anon finishes his presentation on why Kiyone is, in fact, best Tenchi Muyo girl
> Ponies stare in confusion, Fluttershy screeches in outrage
> Anon starts glowing, then gains a halo
> Countless arms and wings kaleidoscope from his back, fading in and out of reality
> He is now the immortal Prince of Waifu Wars
> As the first male, non-Discord, non-Sombra immortal, jaded immortal ladies come out of the woodwork to woo him

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>>29156325

>>29155837
Speak for yourself, I'm from royalty you fucking peasant

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>>29156325
>Kiyone is, in fact, best Tenchi Muyo girl
Sure Anon isn't the Prince of shit taste?