Thank you for shopping with Hassenfeld Brothers Bio-Engineering

>>25437296
"Hello,yes this is Anon"
"I bought a product from your company last week"
"Yes,the grey one with straight hair"
"Yeah,I try to pet her or cuddle her but she just keeps insulting me"
"No,she absolutely hates me"
"I just want to be loved"

>page 10
'no'

>>25437296
you stole my pasta copy

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>>25439100
I'm so sorry.
I just liked the prompt and the green.

Is the original thread dead or something?

>>25439514
I don't think there was ever any real content in it

>>25439538
Just checked it, but it got archived and had no green for a while. What a shame.

>>25437296
It's like a tulpa without the tulpa!
Sold

>>25437296
>tfw this would be a reality if you were born in the next 50-100 years
only joking, our liberal overlords would ban it for being too perfect

>>25439649
I'm currently writing some green.

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>tfw you will never live long enough for this to happen
feels terrible man

>>25439697
>feminazis give rights to pones that never asked for them
>petting a pone is equivalent to harassment
>sexing a pone is both bestiality AND rape
>anything vaguely petlike (ie, petting, scritching, rubbing belly, calling embarassing pet names, qt outfits, ect. ect.) you do with a pone is seen as slavery and automatically gets you life in prison
>all the feminazis all do this shit and even rape and torture pones on a regular basis and get away with it due to m-muh vagina
>if you so much as look at a pone the wrong way, its easily 5 years in prison

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>>25440222
>trips confirm

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>>25440222
>trips confirm my stupid shit
fucking end me

>>25440290
>>25440324
Just Kek my shit up already desu senpai

>>25437296
Well I'm glad this thread came back up. I started writing when I noticed the first thread, but that was right before it died. I'll have something to post in a little bit.

>>25440222
tbqh they might have an excuse to complain, assuming at least a good number of them would be raped/abused/killed by bad owners, plus having presumably no rights whatsoever.

Not to that extent though.

>>25441100
>Stretching in your chair, you feel your back pop a couple times.
>What a day it's been.
>Now that you're finished with your days work, you get up and head to the kitchen.
>After making yourself a small meal, you sit on your couch so you can eat.
>Right when you're about to take a bite, there comes a knock at your door.
"Always when I'm eating." you groan as you stand up.
>Upon reaching your door, you open it and are greeted by
>...
>Nothing.
>That's weird.
>"Hi Anon!"
>Looking down you see the owner of the voice.
"Oh, hi Sugar Plum. What's up?"
>The violet pony is smiling up at you, bushy blue mane covering her left eye.
>"Well, I was about to make a cake, but I realised that we were out of eggs. Do you have any I could borrow?"
"Sure."
>You both head to the kitchen.
"So, is Heather still sick?" you ask while getting what she needed.
>"Yeah. Poor girl. She's been sick all week. But she's getting better."
"That sucks. How many eggs do you need?"
>"Just two, please. Anyway, she said she's feeling better and should be up on her feet by tomorrow, so I wanted to have this made before she does."
>Pulling the desired amount out, you place them in a small paper bag.
"Well that's sweet of you. I'm sure she'll love it."
>You both start heading back to the door.
"I'm glad to here that. Give her my best, will you?"
>"I will."
>You hand her the bag and she grabs it in her teeth.
>"Tankfs, Anohn."
>She turns and starts heading to her house across the street.
>She really is a good kid.
>Heading inside, you sit back down and start on your meal.
>As you're eating, your thoughts dwell on Sugar Plum.
>It's been about four years since that bioengineering company figured out how to make real ponies.
>And just like all the other horsefuckers, you were exciting beyond measure.
>Unfortunately, you were lacking in funds.
>It's alright though, a year into it, your neighbor received one as a gift from her parents.
>Cutest damn thing you've ever seen.

>>25442088
>Once she was fully grown, she had become the neighborhood favorite.
>Everybody loves the girl.
>Including you.
>She's become like a sister to you.
>She spends just about as much time at your house as she does her own.
>Finished with your meal, you take the plate and drop it off in the sink.
>...
>Dishes can wait until tomorrow.
>You go to your bedroom and start getting ready for bed.
>Stripping down to your boxers, you lay down in bed, hoping sleep will take you fast tonight.
>Your thoughts keep dwelling on the ponies.
>You really wish you could get one.
>Your eyelids start to feel heavy.
>Having a pony would be pretty cool.
>To bad you'll never get one.
>Sleep finally takes you, as visions of Sugar Plum danced in your head.

~~~

>Your front door slowly opens in front of you.
>Doing your best walker impression, you shuffle into the house.
>Never has work taken this much of a toll on you.
>You reach your couch and fall face first onto it.
>A moan escapes your lips as your body finally has a chance to rest.
>You wish Sugar Plum was here.
>Her and Heather would always be willing to help you relax.
>That full body massage they both gave you was the best massage you've ever had. No lewd occurred.
>Your recollection is interrupted by a knock on your door.
"Ugh... Maybe it's Sugar."
>You force yourself from the couch and head to the door.
>Upon opening it, you're surprised to see not Sugar Plum, but a UPS driver.
"Um, yes?"
>"I have a package for an..."
>He looks at his scanner.
>"Anonymous? Is this a joke?"
"Nope. That's my name."
>He gives you a skeptical look.
>"Okay? Anyway, I need you to sign for it."
>It's then that you notice a large box behind him, still strapped to his dolly.
"That's a big box."
>You're currently digging in your head to try to remember if you ordered anything.
>After signing, he brings the box inside.
>He drops it off and takes his leave.

>>25442099
>And for the next fifteen minutes, you stare at the box.
>The shipping label is made out to you, but you can't read who the shipper is.
>That part got worn out during shipment.
>As you sit there, staring at the box, a knock comes from your door again.
>"Anon?"
>That's Heather.
"It's open!"
>Your door opens and in walks Heather with Sugar Plum right behind her.
>"Plum said she saw a delivery truck outside your house earlier. Watchya get?"
"This" you say as you gesture towards the box.
>Sugar Plum walks up to it and sniffs it.
>"What's in it?" she says after she pulls her head back.
"That's the thing. I don't remember ordering anything big. So I'm not sure if I should open it."
>Sugar looks back towards the box.
>"It seems strange that you'd just get a box out of nowhere."
>She starts poking it with her hoof.
>"Anon." Heather says quietly.
>Neither Sugar Plum or you hear her.
"Don't poke it. We don't know what it is."
>She pulls her hoof away. "Sorry Anon."
>You pinch the bridge of your nose.
>"Anon."
"Yeah Heather?"
>"Open it."
>You look up at Heather and see her looking at the box.
"What?"
>"Open it. I think it'll be safe."
"How can you be sure?"
>She looks towards you and smiles.
>"Trust me."
>You look back at the box.
"... Fine. I'll open it."
>You get up from the couch and kneel next to the box.
>Heather moves to stand behind you and Sugar Plum on your right.
>Grabbing your keys, you slice the tape open.
>Once you open the flaps, you're greeted with...
>A big white box.
>It has a strange sheen to it, like it was just polished minutes ago.
>"Just like I thought." you hear Heather say.
"What is it?"
>Heather moves to your left side.
>"Don't play coy, Anon. When did you order one?"
"Order what?"
>She looks you straight in the eye.
>"You really don't know what this is?"
"No, I don't."
>She looks back at the white box.

>>25442107
>"Oh. We better hurry then. C'mon, let's get this out."
>She goes to grab the box.
>You help her take it out.
>After it's out, you both place it back down.
>You notice a seam going around the top.
>Two small latches hold it closed.
>"Alright, now just open it. Plum and I will be right over here."
>They both walk behind the box, Sugar Plum looking confused between the both of you.
>Slightly worried, you look over at Heather and are calmed a little by her warm smile.
>You reach out and undo both latches.
>The box beeps when you do so.
>Looking at Heather, you see her gesture for you to hurry.
>As you place your hands on the lid, the box makes a small whirring noise.
>It's starting to give off a comforting warmth.
>Starting to pull on the lid, a small hiss escapes as the seal is broken.
>Once the lid is off, you see that the inside has very soft padding.
>You lean forward to look inside and that's when you see it.
>It's a pony.
>A small unicorn filly.
>She has a grey coat and a bluish grey mane and tail.
>A small dark blue streak goes down the right side of her mane and down the middle of her tail.
>As you're looking down at her in awe, she begins to stir.
>After a couple seconds of twitching around, she opens her eyes.
>She looks around the box in confusion at first, then looks up at you.
>That's when she makes eye contact with you.
>You're instantly lost in her emerald eyes.
>After what feels like hours, she starts to stand.
>A little wobbly at first, but she gets her bearings.
>She sits back on her haunches and continues to stare up at you.
>Heather then makes her presence known again by quietly clearing her throat.
>"Try to pick her up. But be gentle. Put your hands in there, but let her be the one to move into them."
>You do as she says, and wait for the filly to move into them.
>She looks at your hands in confusion before moving a little closer to sniff at them.

>>25442128
>After a few seconds, she must get what you intend to do and moves into your hands.
>You pick her up right under her front legs.
>She looks back into your eyes.
>Slowly, you start to stand up.
>"Now cradle her, like you would hold a baby."
>After some repositioning, you have her cradled in you arms.
>She has yet to break eye contact.
>You feel yourself starting to smile.
>After a couple minutes, she starts to look uneasy.
>"She might be hungry. Check to see if she is."
"How?"
>"Put your finger up to her mouth. If she tries to suckle, then she is."
>You look down at the pony in your arms and bring your finger to her mouth.
>She see's you moving closer to her and lunges forward, latching on to your finger.
>You wince in pain at the combined feeling of her teeth biting down and the strong suction she puts on your appendage.
>Looking back at Heather, you see she is digging thru some smaller boxes that were under the white one.
>She comes back up, holding a small tube in her hands.
>"Here, give her this." she says as she pulls a cap off the tip, exposing a nipple used for feeding.
>You have to force your finger out of her mouth, but when you do, she starts to whimper.
>Taking the tube from Heather, you give it to the filly.
>She latches on and starts to feed.
>As she eats, Sugar Plum walks up to you.
>"Oh, she's so beautiful."
>The filly keeps looking right at you as she eats.
>"I think we're going to go for now." Heather says.

>>25442139
>"Aww, do we have too?"
>"Yes. Anon has to have time by himself to imprint one her. We'll come back in another hour."
>She looks at you and the filly and smiles.
>"If you need me before then, don't hesitate to call, okay?"
"Alright."
>"Come on, Sugar Plum."
>Heather walks to your door.
>"See you in a little bit, Anon."
"Bye Sugar Plum."
>They both leave and now you're alone with this filly in your arms.
>A little pony.
>Here with you.
>Looking at you.
"Hi little one. I'm Anon. And this is your new home."
>She cocks her head to the side when you speak to her.
>This brings another smile to your face.
>And why wouldn't you smile?
>You finally have your own little pony.

>>25442149
And that's all I have for now. I'll start writing again after I get some sleep.

>>25442149
topcute

I was expecting this thread to be all grimdark n shit, but this is better

>>25437296

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>>25442149
>A PONY, SHINY AND NEW and perfect in every way
thank you glorious writefag

>>25442149
adorable so far

>>25442149
M-moar pls sempai

>>25443767

>>25444291

>>25444932

>>25445606
why

>>25445816
because fuck you thats why
also less than 12h passed since the update so I'll fuck you twice

>>25445816
Because I'm still writing.
Thank you for understanding.
Good day to you, sir.

>>25437296
fuck is this? i ordered goddamn oligo primers.

can somebody link the previous thread?
>>25441100

>>25446824
You should be able to do so by yourself. You can access the archive from the catalog, or from page 1. Then, a simple ctrl+f should do the trick.
I know it would be a pain if I had to do that from my mobile though, so here you go
>>25377703

Let's not sit on our asses while waiting for that one guy to finish his green, and let's get a discussion started like in the last thread.

Would you prefer to choose your pony's color, mane style, gender by yourself, or would you rather be surprised?

>>25447115
I would choose them all

>>25447136
I'm afraid that's not how it works Anon.
Everyone has the right to cuddle a pony.

>>25447219
what?

I said I would choose all of those features when it comes to my pony

>>25447619
I thought you said you'd choose all the ponies
I'll go back to reading comprehension

>>25448005
I think we all need a nap right now.

>>25442149
Dear Writefriend,

Please create a pastebin for your story before this thread goes to the bin. Also I would like if you continue your story. Consider continuing your story in either the AiE thread or >>25424532 if this thread goes to the archived bitfields.

Sincerely, Anon.

>>25449124
But it's not slave pony.
I was thinking that if this thread died, I'd post it in PiE.

>>25449124
Also, here it is:
http://pastebin.com/NLDay5Uq
I'm glad that some people are liking this, even though my past writing experiences aren't that good.

>>25449715
PiE yes, I mixed up the two

Bamp

Box thread is back.

/r/ing porn of that awesome fucking cardboard box.

Man, we need more non-traditional green here.

>>25451840
I agree

>>25442149
>Two hours have passed since you received your pony.
>You and Heather are currently sitting at the dining room table, looking over the paperwork that came with your pony.
>Sugar Plum is playing with the filly, both of them laughing as they play.
"This makes it sound so complicated."
>"It's not, really. I mean, it does seem intimidating at first, but it's actually pretty easy once you get used to it."
>You pick up the tube of the growth accelerant and look it over.
"Did you use this on Sugar?"
>"No. She is a first wave pony, and I had heard that they had had problems with this stuff on them."
>When the ponies first came out, they only had earth ponies.
>Those were the first wave.
>Two years later, the second wave came out.
>They had managed to get pegasi working right.
>They figured out how to make the magic in them work, so they could manipulate weather and stand on clouds.
>That still weirds you out.
>Then a year later, the third wave hit.
>Unicorns.
>Everyone was amazed at the magical abilities they had.
>They really have helped with a lot of things since they've been here.
>Suddenly, you hear a scream come from the living room.
>You look up just in time to see Sugar Plum run down your hallway.
>Chasing her was the filly.
>They both disappear into one of your rooms.
>When Sugar Plum ran past you, you noticed something.
>There is one thing all three waves of ponies have in common.
>Not a single one has a cutie mark.
>That's the one thing they couldn't replicate from the show.
>All the ponies know about the show, and from what you've read online, they don't seem to be bothered by that fact.
>Another scream comes from your hallway before you see the filly running back.
>Sugar in hot pursuit.
>She catches the filly and rolls her on to her back.

>>25452925
>"Gotcha! Now you're mine!"
>She then proceeds to mercilessly attack her stomach with raspberries.
>The filly can do nothing but laugh at the onslaught.
>You chuckle at the ponies before Heather gets your attention.
>"Have you figured out a name yet?"
"No, not yet. I figured I'd give it a while before I named her."
>"Oh alright."
"How'd you come up with Sugar Plum?"
>She looks over at the wrestling ponies.
>"Ever since I was a little girl, I always wanted the stereotypical 'pony' for Christmas."
>She looks back at you.
>"I knew I would always name it Sugar Plum, so when my parents got me her, I instantly named her that."
>Just as you are about to say something, the filly breaks away from Sugar and charges towards you.
>"Aaaaaaaaahhhh!"
>She jumps and lands on your lap before scurrying up onto your head.
>Hoofs do not feel good when they are running up your face.
>Once she is settled, she looks down at Sugar Plum and smiles triumphantly.
>"I see how it is, little one. Running to your human for protection? Such a sign of weakness!"
>Sugar Plum stands on her hind legs, her right hoof pointed to your head.
>"Come down and face me like a real pony! Ah Ha Ha Ha Ha Haa!"
>The filly jumps from your head, tackling an unsuspecting Sugar to the floor.
>She uses this as an opportunity to attack.
>"NONONO! NOT THERE PLEAAAAHHHAHAHAHAHAHA!"
>You laugh as Sugar gets beaten at her own game.
>After another hour of playing, Heather decides to head home for the night.
>"Now remember anon, what I said stands. Call if you need me, okay?"
"Yes mother."

>>25452940
Unfortunately, that's all I have for today.
I've got a five month old with a really bad cough, so I've been busy today.
I'll continue to write and post more later.
Pastebin will be updated with this section.

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>>25452960

Based Anon delivered

>>25453506

Someone pls write more, my dick needs it now

Pony-In-A-Box price guide

Royals - $3000
Your choice of the three major princesses: Celestia, Luna, or Cadence.

Mane 6 - $2000
Any pony of the main cast: Twilight Sparkle, Rainbow Dash, Pinkie Pie, Rarity, Applejack, or Fluttershy.

Canon Character - $1500
Any existing secondary or background character: Octavia Melody, Big Macintosh, Moondancer, etc.

Custom OC - $1000
Made to order pony. References must
be provided.
*No estranged color palettes or alicorns, please.

Random - $500
Any mixture of color, race, and gender.

So /mlp/, what's your pick?

Awesome actually having OCs for a change.

>>25455195
If $500 for a bioengineered pony was a reality, then I'm sure supplies for it, and other special healthcare would have insane price scheming.

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>>25455232
>im sure supplies for it

>other special healthcare would have insane price scheming

>>25455195
I'd want a random one. Not because of the price, but because I'd be able to learn about them. As much as I love my waifu, if it was a case like this, it would be, I dunno, boring to just know what they're gonna turn out like.

If I opened the box and a pony I've never seen or even thought about was staring back at me, I'd be in for as much of an adventure as they would be in for. Plus, having one like that would make them more 'mine', versus seeing 1000 people walking around with a Celestia or a Fluttershy.

>>25455195
>OC for 1000
Oh lawd that wouldnt end well.

>>25455343
it says no abstract colors or alicorn ocs, so it wouldnt be that bad tbqh family

>>25455455
>455455

This is a whole new level of witnessed

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>>25452940
hnnnnnnnnnnNNNNNNNNNNGGGGGGGAAAAAAAAAAAH

>>25455195
Funny pricing scheme you got there. Usually the more popular ones are cheaper than the custom ones.
Also unicorns/pegasi/earth are the same price?

>>25455978
I'm guessing for the popular ones they'd have to do something to give them the exact memories/personality of those characters - so neural engineering as well as genetic. Whereas the OCs could just be tank bred, especially if you could make their colour a function of diet in utero.

>>25455455
You clearly haven't seen what i have seen.
Also WITNESSED

Aaaand bump.

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>>25455455

>>25457197

>>25455195
I'd pay $3,000 for an alicorn Twiley.

>>25457883
Then remove its wings?

bump cuz i want more

>>25458628
I'm writing right now.

>>25459166
dubs confirm

This thread is fucking adorable.

>>25460420
I wish the other greens from the first thread would come back.

>>25448005
is that before or after magic kindergarten?

page 8 bump

>>25452940
>She just rolls her eyes before opening your door.
>"Smartass. Alright Plum, we have to go."
>You look over at Sugar Plum.
>She is currently curled up on your couch, the filly nestled into her chest, fast asleep.
>"Do I have to? Can't I stay here for the night?"
>"That's up to Anon." Heather says while gesturing to you.
"I don't mind."
>Sugar Plum squees in excitement until the filly starts to stir.
>"Oh sorry, sweetie."
>The filly calms back down before scooting closer to Sugar.
>Soon after, Heather heads to her house and you're alone with the ponies.
>You sit and chat with Sugar for a good while until your stomach reminds you to eat dinner.
"Guess it's time for dinner. You hungry, Sugar?"
>"Yes please, if it's not to much trouble."
>You reheat some leftover pizza for the both of you.
>"Oh, Pepperoni! My favorite!"
>While you were warming it up, she shifted on the couch so that she could sit up.
>The filly has rolled onto her back, legs spread eagle as she sleeps.
>A small line of drool running out of her open mouth.
"That's flattering."
>Sugar giggles at the display.
>"She really is adorable."
"Yeah."
>After the pizza is heated, you give Sugar and yourself two slices each.
>"Thanks Anon."
>She digs into her first slice before you even sit down.
>"Mmmmm."
>She happily chews on her slice, eyes closed as she savors the pizza.
"You know, it's not the best pizza in the world."
>She swallows before smiling at you.
>"Yeah, but it's still pizza." she says before taking another bite.
"I'm still surprised that you guys will eat meat. Isn't it weird for you?"
>>She puts her hoof to her chin like she is thinking before swallowing the next bite.

>>25461593
>"Not really. It really depends on which individual pony you ask. I mean, yeah, I like meat, but the next pony could only eat fish, or veggies."
>You take a bite of one of your slices while she talks.
>"Hell, there are some ponies out there that are even bigger carnivores than me. I guess that just comes from the human culture. It's not viewed as a taboo by you guys, so some of us decided it shouldn't be for us, either. Why?"
>You finish your bite before speaking.
"Just curious, is all. I've never asked a pony on the matter, so I thought this was a good opportunity."
>"Oh okay, cool. Hey, can I have some water please?"
"Yeah, sure."
>You get up and get some water for the both of you.
>After that, you both talk for a bit more as you finish up your dinner.
>Once you're done, you decide it's time for bed.
>You get a extra pillow and blanket and set the couch up as a bed for them.
>After saying goodnight, you head to bed yourself.
>Today turned out to be an awesome day.
>Hopefully tomorrow is just as good.

>>25437296
Dear Hassenfeld Brothers Inc,
I recently ordered a Rainbow Dash from your fine company. She has grown up happy and healthy while in my and has done marvels for my mental health as i am no longer holding hour long conversations with my cat. (i have disposed of said cat in order to sleep happily again) Back on topic, my Rainbow Dash is happy enough snuggling with me on the couch but i can't help but feel that she isn't experiencing her life to its fullest potential. As im sure you are all well aware RD is very talented in all things sports related and is highly competitive. I however work a 9-5 and am too tired give her my fullest in any sporting event we try together except for napping contests.
It has occured to me that i may very well need a second of your products to maintain her happiness at an exuberant level. However there is one catch, I am not a fan of your lead background horse character model "Applejack".
I'm sure she would be a fine addition and one not to keen to bother me at 3 oclock in the morning to check for monsters in the hallway. Though that is just my opinion, no instead of ordering a ready made Applejack i would like to take this opportunity to request a Griffon model "Gilda" to accompany my little pony in the fruits of her adventures. As i supposed you are well aware the Griffons seem quite courageous and able to defend themselves properly, as they are also quite independent i was hoping that this newest addition would replace my cat. I am hoping that you take this into consideration as i am ready and willing to pay a substantial amount for this newest model even if it the "Applejack" is much more affordable after the most recent price cut. Aside from that there is nothing more i really have to say regarding this matter. I enjoy all your fine products 'thoroughly' and am hoping you allow me to enjoy many more in the future.

Your loyal customer, Anon E Moose

>>25461604
I really need to get more done on my writing.
This is it for now.

>>25461614
>Griffons
Shit, I never thought of that.

>>25461615
Pastebin updated.

>>25457883
I would pay 3k for Luna in a heartbeat

>>25455195
>tfw no bugpone

>>25461880
>Implying they aren't all bugpones
>Implying they aren't feasting on all the love given to those 'foals'
>Implying this isn't their plan to gain enough power to enslave us all
>Implying it won't fail because they realize it's better to just be loved by their human.

>>25461604
Heather is a bad influence. Fillies shouldn't be cursing like that.

>>25462019
Sugar isn't a filly. She's roughly three years old...
OK, she's young. Also, who's to say Anon wasn't the bad influence?

bump from the grave

>>25461880
Wouldn't she count as a Canon Character tho?

>>25461604
So far the filly is more attached to Sugar than to Anon

>>25463613

>>25455195
This is Jeopardy!

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>>25455195
I hab the monie

Gib these cute horsies pl0x

>>25464152

>>25464611

>>25465046
>>25464611
>>25464152
>>25463613
>>25464164
why can't people actually contribute to anything anymore? If this thread dies so be it but don't bump without any content, that's just sad.
Also

>>25437296
Complaint letter#34321

I've noticed a slight discoloration in my most recently acquired pony. It seems to be a shade darker than the rest and on occasion seems to completely dissapear from view. I've also noticed that there has been a severe lack of love coming from my other ponies. I believe i was mistakenly sent a Bugpone model. Though i have placed an order for a random pony i was not expecting a changeling of all things to show up at my door. i would like an exchange for another random given that it too does not turn out to be a gross trypophobic inducing nightmare

Sincerely Anonymous

>>25465623
I contribute my bumps.

>>25465623
you'd think they'd be special-order only

>>25457902
Yeah, for the season finale.

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>>25465623
bump

>>25461604
basically we are keeping alive this thread for you

>>25467719
You don't have to. If it dies, I'll go to PiE. I don't want to be the only reason for this thread to exist. If other writers or drawfags show up, cool, but don't keep a thread alive just for me, please.

Dear Hassenfeld Brothers,

Today I'm writing to thank you for the pony I purchased. I saw how my son loved the resident Nurse Redheart at St. Jude's, and decided to purchase a random pony with some customization. Cinnamon Spark, as we named the colt, made my son smile and laugh; as we purchased the accelerated growth option, he was the equal age to my son in pony years soon enough to give him a friend. They enjoyed playing video games, watching action movies, and talking about the girls (or mares, for Cinn) they only just started liking. They don't know I know that part.

For the last 6 weeks of my sons' life, he had a smile again, thanks to you, through Cinn. No amount of money or gratitude can repay what you have done. But I write this letter to say thank you. Cinn helped my son, and he continues to help me, bless his heart. I would not be at the emotional place I am now without him, and for that, I give my inadequate thanks.

Forever your loyal customer,
Anon

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>>25467906

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>>25455195
How do I acquire my glorious queen?

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>>25467213
Bamp

>>25455195
Random

Always go with the mystery box, always.

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>>25467906
Goddamn, dude

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>>25467906

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>>25467906
>Read once
Das cute man
>Read again, realized I totally missed the 'last six weeks' line.
>Reread the whole thing, now noticing it reads entirely differently with that line
F-Fuck, anon...

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>>25469579

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>>25469026
>>25469052
>>25469579
>>25469966
>>25467997
>all these anons enjoying my writing
Pic related. Will post more tonight. Have to do math shit for now, though.

>>25467906
>>25470108

Dear Hassenfeld Brothers,

I'd like to express my satisfaction with your latest line of My Little Pony ponies. I received a Rainbow Dash for my 16th birthday; my parents believed it to be good for me to get a pet. I was feeling mildly depressed, and had very little motivation throughout the day. My grades were slipping because of this, and so my parents tried to fix it. They saved up for a period of 6 months, refusing to go out to eat, purchase any extraneous 'for fun' stuff, and both pulled extra hours at work. Of course, they didn't tell me any of this was going on, but I noticed.

When I finally did receive my pony, I was overjoyed. We very quickly bonded, and I helped raise her from filly to teenaged mare very quickly. Over that period of 3 weeks, I learned to love life again. She was the first one I saw every morning. We'd make breakfast together and talk about plans for the days or weekends. On top of that, we played together every day after school. Due to the personality built in, Rainbow is very dedicated to sports. We play basketball together, but I'm the only one in my school on the team. So we typically just do it for fun and exercise. I love how competitive she is; she's a very good sport, and knows how to make any play a good time.

Thanks to the combo of lots of physical activity and emotional support from Rainbow, I've recovered very well. My grades are back up, and I feel accepted again. After the car accident last year, I lost feeling in my legs; I'm paralyzed below the waist, but I don't care anymore. I'm happy to be alive, and I'm happy that I have Rainbow. Since she started accompanying me to school as a therapy animal (weird legal distinction, don't you think?), I've felt much more accepted. People are less willing to make fun of the school oddity when she's got a loyal friend like Rainbow on her side.

Thank you,

Anon

(Math shit is done!)

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>>25470834

>tfw you will never see your waifu mature from filly to full grown pony
>tfw your irl waifu will never break your depression and bring new found happiness to your life
>tfw you and your waifu will never make breakfast together
>tfw you will never get into a car accident and be paralyz-

Wait what the fuck?

>>25470915
Is the series of cripple/cancer letters too much? I can tone it down a bit, just write some happy pone stories.

>126 posts
>still no sex

I'm kind of impressed.

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>>25470939
YOU JINXED IT. FUG

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>>25470949

Someone had to say it.

>>25470957
Writefag here. Anyone want "letter of satisfaction," but instead of cripples and cancer, there's sex?

>>25470986

Does big foot shit in the woods?

>>25471003
I thought Bigfoot shit in the vatican.

All jokes aside, I'll get it either tonight or tomorrow. Gotta get up at 5:45AM for math class.

I'm still writing my story, albeit slowly, but I have tomorrow off, so I should be able to write some more.

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Dear Hassenfeld Brothers,

I wanted to write to you saying thanks to your incredible staff and bio-engineering technology.

Without these recent scientific advancements, I do not think I would be here today. I was struggling with suicidal depression until the day you introduced your bio-engineered ponies into the market.

I admit, I hastily purchased a Twilight Sparkle model, as she is my favorite character from the show.

But I did not choose the accelerated-growth option. I wanted to see Twilight grow up all on her own.
I raised her as from a filly to now as an adult mare, and the symbolical bond between us is almost, if not exactly as a father and his daughter.

We love each other very much and she sees me as one of her greatest role models. She even inspired me to restart my academic pursuits and encouraged me to go back and finish college.
I now have a bachelor's degree in mathematics, and a high five-figure salary, all thanks to her.

But it would not have been possible without everyone working at Hassenfeld Brothers, so I personally thank each and every employee for their dedication to your industry.

Sincerely,
Anonymous

>>25442107
>>Your door opens and in walks Heather with Sugar Plum right behind her.
>>"Plum said she saw a delivery truck outside your house earlier. Watchya get?"

>>"Open it."
>>You look up at Heather and see her looking at the box.

>>25442149
>>"Yes. Anon has to have time by himself to imprint one her. We'll come back in another hour."

Dunno bout the rest of you guys, but if I had myself a pony, I'd kick the pushy, nosy, little fucking girl out, lock my doors, and imprint for a week.

>>25471100
>Realised I didn't specify Heather's age.
Oops.
Just so its clear, she is the same age as anon, and a horsefucker too.

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>>25470986
Well it's sort of hinted at here>>25461614
in the last line

>>25471156
>grill
>horsefucker

pick one

>>25471171
OK, I'll drop the horsefuckers part.

>>25471169
Not same writefag. I started at post >>25467906, the others are what I based mine off. But I'll do some lewd, gimme a few minutes. I got until the :15 before I sleep, so 12 minutes to go.

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Dear Hassenfeld Bros,
I ordered a Rarity pony from you guys a few weeks ago and fed her the advancing age paste you guys sent over. I just wanted to say that she has grown up into a fine young 'tight' little mare. It's really killed me waiting for her to be of age when i could fuck her relentlessly without causing her physical harm, but now that i can I've been fucking her all over the house, in my shower, in my kitchen, on the floor in every room, hell even in the backyard at midnight. That little rush of getting caught by your neighbors can really amp up the payoff if you know what i mean.
I had a quick question for you guys though, i mixed in a bit of my cum with the growth formula and now Rarity can't get enough of sucking my dick. Is it because she's been biologically engineered on my part by mixing in my baby batter into the paste or was she just designed to be a slut? Either way it's awesome i just wanted to know because i convinced my parents to buy me another pony so Rarity could have some company while we were away at the therapist. This time i'm thinking of getting either a Twilight Sparkle or maybe even another Rarity so i could have some 'double trouble'. I think you guys can keep the advance growth formula paste thing on this order, i'm thinking of raising her from infancy this time so i can have a sort of 'father-daughter' relationship with her. My parents would totally buy that i'm trying to gain more responsibility, but it's their money so i don't care lol. Anyways thanks again and i hope to take a tour of your fine facility one day so that i can shake the hands of your staff personally and thank them for all their hard work in getting me laid!!!1! XD
P.S. Rarity's been sucking my dick this whole time and i just blew my load. It felt magical, maybe i will get a Twilight this time.

Yours Truly
Anon Y. Mous

>>25471073
>paying respects to under appreciated workers

i like you

>>25471269
Dear Hassenfeld Bros,

Hi there, Anon here. I'm writing to thank ya'll for the service my pony's provided me over the past 7 months. I live in a small town, and the pickins are slim for both friends and companionship of the sexual kind. I ordered a fast-growing Applejack a year ago, and couldn't be happier with my purchase.

I originally sought her out for manual labor, I will admit. I have a small farm (only way to get food in these parts), and most of my equipment was running down. It needed maintenance, and I didn't have time to do all of it myself. When I saw the catalog, I knew I needed an Applejack. I ordered one the day of, and received her less than a week later. When she arrived, I immediately started using the accelerant formula, and started her on some basic chores around the house. By week 2, I came home to a completely renovated home; AJ was already a workhorse. I set her off on the real farm by the next week's end, and things got so much easier after that.

In just 2 months, the farm had been completely revamped; the girl has a green hoof, and I'm practically useless out there now. Now, as I mentioned before, there's rather slim opportunity for sex in this community; but even if there was pussy galore, I think I still would've fallen for dear AJ. We started sleeping together, and treating each other more like partners, rather than pet or farmhand. For the past 4 months, I've been courting Applejack, and it's been working out great for the both of us.

Both of us are satisfied sexually, romantically, and in friendship. I have lots of fun with AJ every day; I love her, and I hope to live a long, happy life with her until the day I die. Thank you,

Anon

Fuck it, I'm namefagging. Did I do the ID right?
I feel this one wasn't as good as the others, and it wasn't really lewd, but fuggit. I have to sleep.

Man if there ever was a Pie bundle i d buy that in a heartbeat, mostly for Pinkie, Limestone and Maud thou, dont care for Flutters 3.0 but probly would feel wrong to leave her out of the bundle still so yea.

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>>25470986

FUCKING DO IT

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>>25471292
>>25471292

>P.S. Rarity has been sucking my dick this whole time and I just blew my load. It felt magical.

>mfw

More of this please

guys guys guys ... I just realized, let's say I wanted an Applebloom, but I didn't want her to mature past filly stage rapidly? What if I want to cuddle with filly Applebloom, What do?

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>>25472466
dont buy the growth paste

>>25472466
Keep buying new Appleblooms once the last one gets too old.

Or better yet, ask about a possible slow-growth paste, so their aging is temporarily halted.

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>>25472466
Dear Hassenfeld Brothers,

I write to you today with a request for the next line of ponies. While I have an Applebloom pony, and I do love her very much, she's all grown up now. I've had her for 4 years, and over that time period, there was only 2 years where she appeared to be the same age as in the show. Now, she's all grown up, and while our time together is great, and I do love her very much, I do desire time with a filly again. She was very cute and perky at that age, and now that she's grown up, she's somewhat matured past the childishness that made her so endearing.

I remember a year ago, back in the last few days before she hit puberty, she saw a pony and her owner having sex in public (weird to think that was unusual just a few years ago). She asked what they were doing, and I had to rush her away to avoid having 'the talk.'

I want more of that. It only took a week before she found out what it was on the internet, and another week before she started making advances on me. I miss the innocence of her as a filly, and while our current relationship is great, sexually and otherwise, I desire the naivety of days past.

I do love my current pony; we've had many satisfying sessions, and ones I enjoy a lot. Because of that first encounter, she's developed a public sex kink, one I'm not too unhappy about. And yet, I want to make another purchase. This time, I don't want her to grow up. Perhaps some sort of anti-growth bottle to ship alongside the fast-growth bottle? I hope my suggestion isn't unreasonable,

Anon

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Hello, brothers Hassenfeld.

Over a week ago, I sent you a message about my situation. I had been diagnosed with leukemia, and my pony Trixie, who I love dearly, has only been in my life for almost a year. I hadn't given her the rapid growth accelerant, and I'm not sure of the health risks of giving it to her now. Would it help her move on quickly, before my death?

Also, I need to know if the rumors of a pony shelter are accurate. It turns out that the candidates, the loner man and the woman, are both unacceptable. The loner is more interested in my pony's kinks, and I punched him out. I already had to talk to some police officers, and I doubt they'll believe my self-defense claim for long. As for the woman, it turns out that my wife had been cheating on me with her and her fuckbuddy, hence the sudden divorce. If it's not clear, frankly, they'd have to pry Trixie from my cold, dead arms if they had the nerve to still want her, and even then I would make at least one of them paralyzed, mark my words. She still hates that whore's pony, so there's that in my favor.

I'm getting off track. My point is that a shelter would be a godsend for people like me who are yards away from death's door. If finances are a problem, I can guarantee that you'd have the funds raised in a week at the most. Ponies are basically people at this point, and nobody would let a fellow person die if they could stop it. The real question is what they're willing to pay, but that can be discussed.

And no, I have not rejected her, God forgive me for breaking her heart more when the time comes.

I included another picture of her. If nothing else, I want to make sure someone knows who she is and what she looks like in case of the worst. If there is a God, I beg of him, don't let her be punished for my sins.

Thank you for your time.
-Flud

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Hello, Brothers Hassenfeld

I am writing to you because I have a major complaint. When I had anal sex with my pony, I got poop on my dick. POOP. ON MY DICK. This is disgusting and an absolute travesty. I can feel it inside my eurethra. I'm absolutely sure it had nothing to do with the taco bell laced with laxatives. Also, my bedsheets are completely ruined, thanks you you fucks. I am shipping the body back, and I demand a full refund.

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>>25473726

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>>25473726

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>>25474747

Bump senpai

>>25475855
I'll get something done by tonight. Been in skewl all day, but I'll be home in a few hours. Any requests?

>>25475899
Someone who purschased a Lyra, yesh

Nice numbers btw

Gonna attempt some green, hope you enjoy.

>*ding-dong*
>You rush from your living room your front door in a flash.
>Today was the most important day of your life.
>Today, you were getting your own My Little Pony.
>You open the door and see a delivery man with a large box on a dolly.
>"Mister uh... 'Anon-e-moose?'"
"Yes, that's me."
>"Sign here please."
>You take the clipboard out of his hand and scribble your signature.
>"I still can't believe people actually buy these things."
"You're saying you wouldn't want your favorite cartoon character in real life?"
>"Let me rephrase. I still can't believe -grown men- are buying these things."
>You roll your eyes and let the post man wheel the box inside your home, then he leaves.

>Giddily, you open up the cardboard box and remove it's contents.
"One tube of 'Xtreme grade Nutrient Paste', one CD and headphones of Language-Assistance, and..."
>Shoving away the styrofoam peanuts, you unveil a shiny white container.
>And on the front were three pink butterflies.
"...one Cryo-Box."
>Gently lifting it out, you place it on the wooden floor of your living room.
>The technology of the future still amazes you, and the affordable price of it even more.
"Hmm, there should be a-... ah!"
>You fish the instruction booklet out from the box and read it.
"Thank you for shopping with Hassenfeld Brothers blah, blah, blah... bring years of joy blah, blah, blah, Please read the instructions before opening the Cryo-Box containing your pony..."

>>25475942
kk, will start thinking about that. Thanks!

>>25476003
Oh, this is pretty nice. Keep going!

>>25476003
>Skimming the lines, it was all a bunch of general stuff.
>The Cryo-Box doubling as a bed was a bonus...
>Rapid growth process...
>blah... blah... bl-
"Please allow three to four weeks before your colt/filly to age before engaging in sexual activity?"
>...
>Not sure if disgusted or unf.
"If rapidly aging, sexual contact may begin after two weeks... ooookay."
>And a summary of what to do with the language CD...
"Seems simple enough."
>Putting away the cardboard box and everything else, you clear some space in your living room and place the Cryo-Box in the center.
"Press the red button on the side of your Cryo-Box to begin the thawing process. Allow one-hour for the process to complete?!"
>You look back at the box, and stare into the little view panel.
>You rub away some of the build up frost and see a little mare's face appear, gently sleeping.
>...You suppose one hour would be worth it.
>Activating the switch, a countdown timer appears on the side and starts at 60:00.
>59:59.
>59:58.
>59:57.
>You'll check in on her later...

>00:03.
>00:02.
>00:01.
>An short alarm sounded and drew your attention back to the box.
>Two latches on the top and bottom release, and you carefully remove the lid.
>Some steam billowed out, but there she was.
>Your own little Fluttershy, she looks so peaceful...
>Setting the lid aside, you look over her and make sure there were no imperfections or damaging.
>Thank god there wasn't.
>She already has her cutie mark, damn shame the ponies can't really 'earn' their marks here on Earth.
>Their either pre-stenciled or they don't have any at all.

>>25476127
This is really good. Keep it up.
I'm currently writing more of my green.

>>25476017
>Literal Cancer
How'd you get/choose that writefag name, writefag?

>>25477254
My first post >>25467906 was about a kid with literal cancer being comforted by his pony in his last weeks of life.

Literally cancer.

>>25476085
>>25477254
tbqh i never noticed that before, best trip ever fAm

>>25475942
Dear Hassenfeld Brothers,

I have a question. Do ponies have legal rights? Specifically, can you charge a pony with sexual assault? My fatass neckbeard of a neighbor purchased a My Little Pony: Lyra model last year. She had, until 2 months ago, not been out of the house, and he and her had kept me up many hours into the night with their nightly sexual escapades.

2 months ago, as previously stated, he started showing her around the neighborhood. However, when she saw me, she got a very creepy look in her eyes. Since then, I have documented proof of more than 60 different cases of stalking, including, but not limited to:

1. Taking photos of me through my bathroom window while I'm showering, shitting, or even just cleaning the bathroom.
2. Taking photos of me when I'm getting dressed in the morning.
3. Taking photos of me while I'm nude around the house (she sabotaged my blinds the previous day, and set up an automatic camera system right outside my window)
4. Taking photos of me doing the dishes (???)
5. Stealing money from me or her owner and dropping it on the sidewalk, and then groping my ass when I bend over.

Like the faggot I apparently am (ask my neighbor), I don't enjoy the attention. If I can sue this Lyra, I will, but I need to know if I can. Please get back to me. She's filming me typing this out, and I'm tiring of her attempts to get my pants off while doing so.

Anon


>>25477276
Thank you!

bamp

>>25477930
gud thread no die

>>25477362
That anon should just get a bonbon instead of suing lyra, thou dont think that d work all the time

>>25478400
Dear Hassenfeld Brothers,

After much deliberation, and notes from your legal department discouraging legal action against the pony OR its owner, I have decided to get a Bon Bon pony. I purchased the accelerated growth option, and it has been 6 weeks. She is freshly and fully grown, and I am quite satisfied with my purchase so far. 2 weeks ago, I attempted sexual contact with the pony for the first time, and found it to be quite enjoyable. I won't be ashamed to admit, it was my first time, and I did it in front of my neighbor's house just to piss him off.

I had a few onlookers, and even though public sex is still a relatively fresh thing, legally and socially, I still enjoyed myself greatly. I can see why Lyra and that fatass do it so often. I hope that our nightly copulation disturbs him; I work night shifts, so I get home around 4AM. I've trained my Bon Bon to sleep until then, and to wake up and be ready by the time I'm home. When I get home, I take her as close as possible to the walls, and pound her until she screams in ecstasy, thus ensuring my neighbor is awoken every morning. At 4AM.

Just wanted to let you know I'm happy about this petty victory,

Anon

Note: Posting from my desktop, I don't know exactly how the ID thingy works, but it should be the same

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>>25478848

Question:
I'm the one writing the first green with Sugar Plum. Do you want me to start using my trip?
Or should I continue as anonymous?

>>25478873
Dear Hassenfeld Brothers,

Hi! Lyra here. I heard from my friend that my neighbor and future lover, Anon, is writing to you about my supposed `stalker' behavior. I'm just telling you right out, it's not true. Maybe a little true. But either way, I love Anon, and we're going to get married. I'm writing because I'm trying to find the most effective way to force a humans' love, and all the literature that I've been able to find has been completely contradictory.

I was wondering if your scientists had figured it out. And also, if taking pictures of them at all times of day, photoshopping lovey dovey hearts onto those pictures, printing them professionally, framing them, hanging them all over your room, and then mailing him samples (and samples of my cum) at random intervals, is, well, part of the human courting ritual.

All the best,

~~Lyra~~

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>>25478950

>>25478920
Trip! Do you, man, like. Come on. Your green is pretty damn cute; way better than my letters. I want more! And a trip would help id you.

As the rule goes, trips are for content producers. You produce content, so you can trip all you like.

>>25478950
>>25478964
Dear Hassenfeld Brothers,

Bon Bon, requesting advice. The Lyra next door has not stopped her advances on my Anon. All attempted deterrence efforts have failed. I was the one who suggested the 4AM sex, and I have faked screams far louder than Anon is capable of making me produce just to piss her off. Attempt backfired, made her desire his monkey dick even more.

Even after I licked all his spoons, the modern mare's way of claiming a mate, in full view of her network of cameras, she refused to back down. She is becoming a hazard to my relationship, and I need ways to deter her further. I have suggested several times that we simply move away, as my Anon has the money to do so. Attempts to suggest as much have been replied with "I have to get back at him" and "fuck that idea, I want that faggot to pay."

Because of these nonsensical ramblings, Lyra's attempt at stealing MY Anon, and the neighbor's general faggotry, I come to you for advice.

I hope you reply soon.

2*Bon

Did anyone catch that Bon Bon's anon is the one >>25473002's AB caught in the sexing?

>>25478970
Thanks, but your letters are a lot better than my green. Keep them up.

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>>25479063
pic related

>>25479036
How could that be possible? There was no indication.

>>25478848
>I had a few onlookers, and even though public sex is still a relatively fresh thing
>>25473002
>she saw a pony and her owner having sex in public

>>25479262
That was the intended link. Sorry if it was confusing.

Ok, I'll make another one tonight, but I have some more math shit to do before I can do that. I'll be back later!

>>25478848
>in front of my neighbor's house
I'd shoot any mofo that fucked on my beatiful lawn without a second thought

>>25452925
maximum hnnng

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>>25455195

>>25479819
Dear Hassenfeld Brothers,

I write to you today to tell you a story. See, some mofos were struttin down the street, right? Totally normal, man. I was inside, havin my tea, when them mofos, a man and his pone, hop my fence!! The fuck they think they doin, I thinks to myself. So I grab my shotgun, put down my tea, and head to the front door o'my crib, rite?

I slam open that shitty ass door, and I sees them fuckin in my front lawn! Shitty ass performance, too. Damn white niggas be poor ass lovahs. Either way, I had a loaded shotgun, he had a loaded white dick. There was no contest. I put what was left of their heads on a pair o'pikes out front, man. Feels good.

Stay fresh, mah nignogs. Merry Christmas.

Your Nigga,

Anon

last one tonight

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Bump

>>25481550
I will love and cherish her.

If she develops a daddy fetish, I will be a bit disturbed.

>>25480782
'MURKA!

And so the bumping begins.

>>25482288
Well, now that I'm awake, I can start contributing soon. I still have to get to work, but it's a desk job, so I'll write some there. Anyone want to see green?
Fair warning, my green is shit, but I'd like to improve

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>>25482482
Can't be worse then mine
Have at it

>>25437296
Dear Hassenfeld Brothers,

I'm contacting you with regards to a potential problem that I have discovered with the Moondancer that I purchased from you six months ago (Serial Number: MND00856). Up until recently she has been a perfect companion :- intelligent, curious, everything I could have hoped for and more. Unfortunately, recently this has changed.

Two weeks ago we were out shopping together, and for the first time since I unboxed her she came into contact with another Moondancer. At first both I and the other owner thought nothing of it, after all both of them had interacted with other ponies that you manufacture before with no major incidents - although the personality that is flashed to Moondancer doesn't interact well with your Twilight Sparkle units imho.

Unfortunately, being confronted with a doppelganger appears to have substantially altered her personality. For two hours she was completely silent, and then she began to ask me questions - deep philosophical questions that I didn't feel adequately placed to answer. I've never hidden anything from her up until this point, and I couldn't do so then; I told her everything I know about your company, the details of the manufacturing process that you use, even some basics on how genetic modification and personality flashing works that I remember from University.

I don't think being told that her entire species was manufactured in a factory somewhere comforted her, and the idea that there are hundreds of Moondancers out there might have been simply too much for her to take. This, I'm afraid, was only the beginning. As I've said before, she's intelligent and curious - before I knew it she was starting to perform research into the history of her species and your company, I didn't stop her (how could I, and still consider myself her friend?) but part of me wishes I did. She hadn't come out of her room in two days. So I went to check on her, maybe if I'd gone in sooner I could have stopped her...

>>25482884
She was swinging from a cord hung from the light, and strange to say, for the first time since this began she looked peaceful - like her old self again. I'll never be able to unsee what I saw in that room, but the worst part was what she had written - scrawled on the walls, over and over, were these words:

WHY DID THEY MAKE US?

Hopefully, the cause of this is entirely my own - my foolish decisions that led to this. But if there is any chance that something in the manufacturing process causes this - I beg you, please act before it is too late.

Faithfully,
Anon E Moose

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>>25482911

>>25482911
A self aware species can't into purpose. What was that shit mewtwo said again? Circumstances of birth and such? What a retard anon was to not show her that movie.

>>25482884
>>25482911
>That writing
>those digits
AAAAAAAA

>>25483286
And on your left we can see the easily impressed faggot

>>25483305
>easily impressed
>implying that you have standards
Look where you are you melanin enriched gentleman

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>>25482911
Damn, that's dark.
I can handle human people dying. Not ponies.

bamp

>>25482972
>>25483065
>>25483286
>>25484096
I didn't originally intend for it to get that dark, I was simply fascinated by some of the implications of the technology - and that's where it took me

I did originally write a darker ending, but decided that it was a step too far

>>25485084
I'd like to know what happens to that other Moondancer

>>25483605
>One pair of dubs.
>One try hard attempt at feels.
Subtlety is the word. Less is more when dealing with this kind of stuff. Like cancer's story you euphoric three chinned classy sir.

>>25485084
I got a very Blade Runner feel from it. What's the full ending - Moondancer sets out to kill all the other Moondancer models so she can be 'the real one'?

>>25485260
Original ending was that Moondancer had published her research online before committing suicide, with the implication being that if it is a manufacturing defect, then there will be a lot of suicidal / very angry equines shortly.

>>25485173
Suicides all the rage these days
You should try it
moondancer did

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>>25471292

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>>25485375
>Telling me to kill myself
>Not presenting counter argument
Does this mean I win?

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>>25485326
So Moondancer kills herself then has others kill their owners

>>25455195
$6000 for the royal sisters

Would you a genetically crafted poni? Would you a genetically crafted Alicorn that's equal to you in height? Would you with a perma-smol poni?

>>25486839
I would a bughorse.
and that same bughorse as other ponies too, shed have to have a roleplay fetish like that.

>>25486970
Would you snuggle a bughorse in her natural form, chitin and all?

>>25487102
Definitely

>>25487273
Would you a bughorse disguised as your favorite pony, because of her low self esteem?

>>25486839
1. yes
2. yes
3. define "small"

>>25487398
As Big Mac is to AJ, AJ would be to this hoers
Permapuppy Poni

Mama miya! This is a bamp!

Write Fag OP

>>25486839
Can I get alicorns that are taller than me?
> Would do if so

>>25487698
>Tfw no 3 meter pony box
>Tfw will never ride a mlp hoars to the horizon

Why live?

>>25487698
Yes, anon. You can in this hypothetical.

>>25487776
;-;

>>25487686
Sorry, had a really fuckin busy day. Actually had to do work today. I'll try to get some tonight, but again, math tomorrow morning. Gotta get to sleep tonight.

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>>25437296

I wish Hasbro started producing those
I would buy it, even if it costs half of my lifespan

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Im looking for some pony pictures, give them, now

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>>25487997
Dear Hassenfeld Brothers, I couldn't find anything on your website. Do you guys sell custom steps for fillies? My apple bloom is having some trouble and im afraid she might hurt herself(pic related) I've given her the perma youth paste so she could stay small and cute forever. Please send weird quickly, I would rather purchase a Hassenfeld Brothers staircase than build one myself.

Regards Anon

>>25486839
Yes.
Probably not.
Of course.

>>25486839
Of course.
Yes.
No.
Bonus: I would a genetically crafted Saddle Arabian as well

>>25488373
>>25488419
both ya'll pretty good in my book

>>25486839
yes
absolutely
no

The implications of all of this would be amazing. These are living breathing organisms. No way would we stop at ponies.

That UPS guy that said, "I can't believe grown men buy these." He probably went home to his catgirl maid.

The US Army probably created thousands of some supersoldier that would never question the banner of freedom. Then, you can send your army to every country, who's gonna argue when you litterally have thousands of able bodied volunteers?

What about organs? Could they create faceless organism blobs with just enough brain to run basic body functions and act as farms for hearts, kidneys, lungs, and pretty much anything else you'd ever need?

After a while I'm pretty sure they'd just start making humans.

I love these greens, but damn, that would be some world.

>>25488599
They're already making lab-grown cow meat; on top of that, they've managed some pretty incredible things with lab-grown replacement organs. Not quite medical-ready, but damn close.

I'm not saying we're <10 years from genetically engineered pet ponies, but we're <50 years for sure.

>>25488626
Lab grown cow meat AND a handleless Segway that makes people look like douchebags?

What a time to be alive.

I think the biggest hurdle will be the ethics crowd, similar to how we'd be so much more forward with stem cell research if you didn't have all those people chanting that you'll go to hell for it or some shit.

Once we get to sentient organisms, I think those debates will be important, but for now, just let someone cure my grandfather's dementia.

>>25488599

>The year is 2039
>Hasbro owns all the rights to bio-engineered organ producing labs.
>They could be used for so much.
>Cloning
>Super Soilders
>Organ replacement.

>But Hasbro refuses to sell the technology.
>Instead only using their labs to produce life size sentient ponies that only have cutie marks on one side of their butt.

>>25488654
So much could be done without ethics, but it's important to have them. Without debates on what's right and wrong, we'd be in a much more advanced place, but also a very much worse off place for many people. It's important to maximize the average and individual satisfaction in everything you can, and ethics helps make sure that happens.

And yeah. I want more research into a few things:

1. Strong AI and AI Ethics
2. Bio-engineering for food and organ replacement
3. Mental health

In that order. Because #1 will royally fuck us over if we don't get it EXACTLY right.

>>25488729
you had me until the spoiler
FUCK you

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>>25488729
>spoiler

good thread no die

>>25488776
>1. Strong AI and AI Ethics

This was one fo the reasons that motivated me to write
>>25482884

Because someday, we're going to have sentient AIs, and they won't have to create philosophical or religious reasons to answer the question "why am I here?" they'll have the answer laid out for them plainly in every research paper and news article: you're here because your creators got bored of doing certain work, and decided that creating life was simpler than doing themselves. It will be a very interesting time to be alive when they figure that out.

>>25490105
>doing themselves
doing it themselves

This is why I shouldn't post when I first get up

Dear Hassenfeld Brothers,

I ordered a sweet, kind, caring, and lovable pony. Instead I got a rabid, angry cougar. I will not be conducting business with your company again.

Sincerely,
Anonymous

>>25490189
So, you got Harshwhinny?

>>25490303
Damn son.

Blump

>>25490717

Dear Hassenfeld Bros,

Since I was born, 60 years ago, I haven't once encountered a creature as loving and kind as the Fluttershy I ordered when the first wave was released. I first ordered her when I was very sick; I needed a companion while I locked myself alone in my room. Even in the first wave, you advertised that they were immune to disease, so I decided that I needed a pony in my life. When she arrived, and she grew fast, I was initially shocked at how quickly my health recovered. Having a cute filly floating around the house for a week cleared it right up, I think. I purchased the fast growth option, and she matured by the time I was back to work. I totally fell in love. There was someone there, every time I came home, who was happy to see me. I had someone to talk to, and to share my passions with. After just a month, I purchased several more animals-not because she asked, but because she made me want them through HER passionate talks on them. After just a year, my house has become a small zoo! I loved it, though, and so did she.

See, it's been a good 40 years with her. Yesterday, a drunk driver hit her while we were crossing the street. We were headed to the pet store, to purchase feed for the genetically non-engineered horse we own. She fortunately died instantly, and the doctors tell me painlessly. I'm not doing okay. The animals need a caretaker, but I can't do it myself, and I cannot afford another Fluttershy; nor can I emotionally handle another one this soon after my loss. I only ask for help. I don't know what kind. But help.

Your forever kind customer,

Anon

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>>25491788
Why do you make me feel this feel that I feel

>>25491788
>The driver gets off with intoxicated driving and destruction of property charges because he didn't end a sentient life with full rights, only killed engineered property.

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>>25490384

>>25461604
more pls senpai

>>25492195
>>25493730
Writing a sequel when I get home. I like this OldAnon.

>>25492216
Maybe.

>this fucking thread

Glad to know /mlp/ hasn't lost its touch

Jesus christ, people

>>25493771
Glad to be of service. ^:)

>>25490113
No, it works too.

"I am so bored of having to do myself. I should make ponies. They'd be adorable helpers and having a few of them around would mean I don't have to do myself."

Dear Hassenfeld Bros,
I'm writing to you for advice on a problem which has popped up with the pegasus mare that my wife and I bought for our daughter, Jasmine. Summer Breeze has been a godsend to Jazzy and has really brought her out of her shell since she joined our family.
About a week ago while my wife was with Jazzy at a gymnastics meet out of town I arrived home from work to find the house a total disaster with a heap of things including the good silver piled in the middle of the living room. As I stood taking it all in,
Summer popped her head out from inside the pile and asked how I liked her nest. While I really wanted to ask why she needed a nest when we bought her the best bed that we could find, all I could muster in my state of shock was that I thought that she had built a fine nest and I was pleased as punch with her. She then became very excited, hopping up and down, flapping her wings and chirping like a songbird. She then ran to the kitchen, pulled out the silverware drawer and licked EVERY spoon. Ever since that night she's been very standoffish toward my wife and daughter and puffs up every time my wife comes near me.
I've studied all the manuals and supplemental material that came with Summer but it makes no mention of any such behavior. What is happening and should we be alarmed? Please help...

Thanks,
Anon

>>25494051
Kek, this is good shit. Keep going.

Well

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>>25494051

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>>25437296
>Synthetic Lifeforms
Would you risk your life for your fellow man? Even if that man was a pony?

Finally, I'm off work for the weekend. I've been working ten hour shifts at work lately, so I haven't had much time to write, but I should be able to write more now until Monday. I'll get a bit more done of what I have now, then post it.

>>25494542
Yes

Dear Hassenfeld Bros thanks you for the purchase of Twilight sparkle my son since 4 had the toy of "Wingless" Twilight Sparkle and had loved her ever since when this happened my son heart was filled with joy, when he was 12 he was very depressed as with his memories of his friend being In a car accident and him being bullied for his over advanced smarts, also has been in a mental hospital here and there he had a lot on him I gave him his filly on his 13 birthday there was no rush as he did use any of the nutrient paste using it on his lemon trees instead, talk about that he says he made a combustible lemon to burn somebody's house down, which made me worry more as he had ADHD it didn't as much as I thought it would, The pony did lots of studying AND I MEAN LOTS, Twily as he called it showed him the wonders of the world and help his grades, life and self esteem in general they both became Best friends even one time while going through his artistic phase he drew it's umm cutie mark, they becamegamers as they became bike riders. Then there came the moment 5 years after as I mentioned he only had 1 other friend and he is.......well somewhere else at the moment and with his problems he dint make anymore still being bullied, during his prom he had no date, no friends he was just using his IPad in the corner until he was brought on the stage as prom king he gasped in excitement as no one liked him, but then Pig's blood(Bump if you get the reference)Drenching his iPad, his clothing and his dignity Wet, he drove home going through the door and going to the basement before I can say anything he closes and locks the door behind him, it just missing him I woke up to a long bang, I thought it was a roober so I got my gun but it wasn't in its place where I left it so I grabbed a aluminum bat(Again reference)and headed throughout the hallway to the living room, I checked no one was there but then my attention was caught when I heard and smelled a creak and smoke from the basement.

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>>25494613

Well it my first story sucks 4chan, And I'm going deeper wish me luck....

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>>25494671
Okay?
Good luck, I guess.

>>25491788
>>25492195
>>25492216
>>25493730

Dear Anon,

This is Kathy. I represent Hassenfeld Brothers in matters of pony loss, and I want to talk to you about how to help the current situation. I want to express my deepest condolences. We have several pony loss counselors, and we've already dispatched one of them to your house, along with several zoo specialists. They're coming with all the supplies you'll need; they'll take care of your animals for now.

I want to speak to you personally now. Anon, it breaks my heart to read your letter. I wish you the best, and all my good thoughts go out to you. I want you to know, one of my ponies wants to meet you. She heard your story, and instantly started begging to get to know you. Her name is Purple Nurple. If you want, I can bring her over personally, and we can talk about whatever you want. If that's too much, I'll let her know.

I hope you have a speedy recovery.

All the best in the world,

Kathy

>>25494722

Hey, Kathy.

It's Anon again. I thank you so much for all you've done. It's been, what? Two months since I sent that letter? I think it has. I'm sending you this just to thank you, for once again making my life alright. I still miss Fluttershy, and I don't think that'll ever stop. But what you and Nurple have done is above and beyond the best I could've ever hoped for. You two have helped me to see the light again, and I love you for it.

Every time I called you at 3AM because I dreamed about her again, you answered. You told me it was going to be okay. Nurple, you helped me to see the joy in taking care of my animals again, and helped set things up with the construction ponies so I could do it myself again. Kathy, you went against corporate, and started a petition for pony rights; it's far from being over, but we've already won a few significant battles. The driver still walks free, but both of you have helped me be at peace with it.

Please, come over anytime. My door is open. You two saved my life.

Thank you so much.

Anon

captcha: trees

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>>25494722
>>25494772

>>25494722
>Her name is Purple Nurple.
Jesus fuck why would you name a pony that.

How many owners do you think didn't want their Pony and sent them back?
How many ponies were left to wander and became strays?
Is there a department at The Hassenfield brothers that deals with these unwanted ponies? Sort of a rescue center for reject horses?

>>25494909
Purple Nurple is a silly pony.

>>25494975
Not many. Mostly conservatives and Muslims.
Not many. Their cuteness and friendly nature quickly gets any that were abandoned on the street.
Yes. It's not a big project (certainly a philanthropic one), but they take ponies in and train them in search and rescue, therapy, and other related tasks.

>>25494613
I... I'm not even going to ask. I'm just. In awe.
What the hell is going on?

>>25494909
How many dogs and cats have retarded names? I knew a guy who named his mutt 'roadkill'. There wasn't any tearjerker story about finding the dog injured on the road or anything; he just liked the name.

>>25494772
...das cute, though.

>>25495363
Grade A+ autism is going on
B E H O L D

>>25495440
Thank you! And I know the name was stupid. It was supposed to be endearing.

>>25495443
Jesus Lord Almighty, save us from the autism.

Ok, anyone have any requests? I'm fresh outta ideas; I'm writefagging for a different thread, so my brain juices aren't flowing this direction. I'll be able to write another letter if I have a prompt, though

I thought we got rid of the Fluffy Pony threads during the Scruffening?

>>25495466
This ain't that, friendo
Reading comprehension

>>25495481
Close enough not to make any difference. We're already getting grimderp stories, it's just a matter of time before full-blown abuse.

>>25495505
>depressed people's lives being fixed by ponies
>abuse/gore
>IT'LL HAPPEN

????
explain, or kindly fuck off
thread is pretty gud so far

>>25495505
This, let someone ask for a tracy, do it!

>>25495363
I thought you weren't going to ask?

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thred is ded

>>25494671
I say, mate, your story could with a bit of punctuation.

>>25496401
>could do
Sorry, buts it's a petpeev of mine when you correct someone's typo with a typo of your own.

>>25494671
I can tell you're not a native English speaker.
Just practice more (ideally not publicly) before writing longer and more complicated stuff.

>>25495664
Dear Hassenberg Bros.,
HELP!!! My pony won't stop trying to stab me! She keeps repeating horrible things she's going to do to my male anatomy in my sleep! I've taken to locking my door at night and sleeping with one eye open but regardless she finds a way in and manages to crawl on top of me to sleep. Everyone I wake up she's there, and she'll wake up herself at the slightest movement to which then she starts spewing hateful comments about the Jews. That part's not so bad But all the rest, the threats, the knife wielding, the constant advances. They're all getting to me! What should I do? My pony model was a 500 dollar 'random variant', if it helps she also has a grey pelt and silver hair, and I swear a mouth full of sharp teeth. Could I have gotten a defective pony? Can I get a return? Is there a even a refund policy!?

Anonymous

>>25496845
Hassenberg Brothers Inc.
Internal Investigation
Follow-Up

Dear Hassenberg Brothers,
Can I retract my last complaint letter? Sorry, it's just that ever since I've caved into her advances my random pony, who I've take to calling 'Tracy', has calmed down quite a bit. Now there's hardly any venom in her threats, I've also removed all sharp knives in my house and placed them on the top shelf. Now she has nothing to wield except the butter knives which has turned her from a walking nightmare into a tsundere dream. Many times I'll awaken to her steadily trying to stab my stomach with a useless dull blade, sometimes she'll cry "Why won't it go in?" to which I reply "It will soon"and I proceed to sex her. Thanks Hasbro! I love my 'Little Pony'!

Signed Anonymous & TRACY

PS she was looking over my shoulder near the end and tried to butter my neck. I sexed her again

>>25494909

You know how newly imprinting fillies and foals have a very strong grab/suckle instinct?

Do not put the shivering new pony under your shirt before feeding to warm them up.

>>25497068
Best explanation ever

>>25497068
>>25497092
kek.
That's the canon explanation, everyone. You can go home now.

>>25496544
Aye.

Dear Hassenfeld Brothers,

I'm a Fortune 500 company owner and my nieces and nephew managed to convince me that rather than raising full-sized horses, having my own "pony herd" would be more fun.

I took advantage of your early-model crowdfunding offer and purchased an entire batch of the original model "earth ponies", where I've been raising the baker's dozen or so for the past six years here on the farm I own in Colorado.

To my surprise, we're expecting numbers fourteen, fifteen, and sixteen in a few months. Will they imprint normally on the first human they see, or is it possible for a newborn Hassenfeld to imprint on a mare?

I know, they're supposedly sterile. To quote the old movie, life will find a way. Tickler's rather proud that he's going to be "Daddy's Daddy." and apparently your earth pony model has a few "fertility magic" tricks up their sleeves (mine are fond of plaid flannel, for reasons I have yet to determine but often delight in, you betcha.).

I expect you'll be rather interested in keeping up with developments. I've enclosed the ranch phone number, feel free to call if you'd like to visit.

A. Nonny

(the hoofprints are Tickler, Rosie, Posey, and Fleur, but they're horrible mouthwriters.)

>>25497280
Can the manufactured ponies breed?

>>25494051
That's cute

>>25487367
what if my favorite pony is bughorse?

>>25497525
I wouldn't buy one if they couldn't.

If you drink the pony growth serum, do you become the little mare?

>>25497946
I meant with each other, not us.

>>25497993
Dear Hassenfeld Brothers,

I'm writing to inquire about the shelf-life of the growth serum that came with my pony. I chose to have my pony mature naturally, and caught up in the excitement when I received it, naturally misplaced the bottle. Fast forward to 3 weeks ago.

I was back from exercising at the gym, and wanted something to help my muscles recover. Long story short, I may have accidentally ingested the whole tube save for roughly two tablespoons, mistaking it for protein mix in my cabinet. (Admittedly, it doesn't taste half bad. I didn't catch on until I realized I didn't have any strawberry flavored mix. But, young fillies and colts surely wouldn't ingest it if it weren't appetizing.)

Ever since then I have been experiencing concerning symptoms. It started with strong insomnia. I couldn't sleep, my muscles ached, and my teeth and fingers were incredibly sore. I finally got relief when, after 3 days sleepless, I fell asleep standing up at work. I awoke completely refreshed, however. Now, I can only sleep standing. But, that's not the worst.

Within the past week, the fine bones in my feet and my toes have been lengthening and solidifying, to the point I can no longer wear shoes, and I am forced to walk on my tiptoes. My toenails have also grown thick and hard, however, so this is not very difficult. I've also been noticing excessive hair growth along my ass-crack.

Has this happened before? Have there been any human testing with the growth serum? Please send correspondence, if possible. My local doctors are at a loss, and refuse to make any actions for fear of legal reprisal.

Sincerely,
A.H. NonyMooz

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>>25498300

Your dubs demand continuation.

Pls Anon.

>>25498300
Dear Hasseneld Brothers,

This is A.H. NonyMooz, again. Sleeping upright has become a little easier lately. I still fall over on occasion, as I have nothing to counterbalance myself as I sleep. I've been considering fashioning something to fasten over my head and upper body so if I sway one way or another, I don't topple over. Regardless, I will continue to send letters. I'm concerned my previous letter might've been lost, so I rewrote it and included it in this envelope. (I don't have reliable internet where I live, and based on your website, I don't know if I sent the address to your corporate address, or if it was your inquiry PO Box.)

I should probably provide some background. My pony I got was a custom pony. I was delighted when your company began the Compatibility And Personality Placement Program. (CAPPP for short, correct?) I wanted to get a pony from your company for a long time, but I didn't particularly want a stock variety pony such as a Derpy, but I didn't have the confidence to design an OC, for fear of creating a being with an unstable personality. The CAPPP quiz was an excellent option, and I feel you fit me to a very good pony. Eon is very sweet, and his personality compliments mine very well. He has taken much interest in my progress, and has been helping document everything. As an update:

It is currently 7 weeks past date of consumption.
- My toes and teeth have ceased being incredibly painful, however, they still have a dull throb. My toes have fused into one large "digit" and I now have a solid, hoof-like appendage on each leg.
- My tailbone has lengthened slightly, approximately an inch and a half, and the hair growth has grown more copious, both in length and thickness. It is immobile, but I have some sensation in it.
- My ears have grown slightly lengthened and pointed. Eon noticed the other day that they appear to twitch in the direction I'm looking if something captures my attention.

(continuing in next post...)

>>25498509
- My teeth haven't changed very much, but they remain tender. It has slightly affected my appetite, as eating can be difficult since they are sensitive. I've noticed a preference for bread, and things like granola. My tongue also has a slightly rough texture now, akin to wet, fine-grit sandpaper.
- Emotionally, I've been.. volatile. I've been flighty and twitchy, and prone to anxiety. Eon playfully tossed a towel toward me the other day as I was getting out of the shower, and it hit my lower back. I subsequently panicked, slipped out of the shower in my haste to flee, and ripped the towel-rack out of the wall. I have also been easily overwhelmed emotionally, and I broke down and cried the other day because I was tired and Eon suggested I take a nap.

Any other changes have been minimal, so far. It's been a little over 35 years since the original release of the first wave, correct? I was reading at my library, and the information I've been able to gather about the ponies implies that the growth serum helps "guide" the genetic code of the pony to fully develop, and that to be more efficient as a company, you have all ponies have the same "base" genetic code that was derived from several animals such as equines, dogs and other creatures. This was for many reasons, all very reasonable, I'm sure. The "base" code my reading keeps referring to: Does this imply that ponies have an active and volatile physical make-up that is guided by the serum and other supplied materials? That would be very similar to retrograde activated stem-cells (conmanly referred to as "Stim-Packs) that are utilized in military and medical applications. This, I'm sure, works well with the base code for your ponies, as they are literally designed for eachother. However, I'm far from genetically engineered, and I cannot begin to anticipate what the growth serum is causing to me. I will continue to update you as I'm capable. Work is very demanding.

Sincerely,
A.H. NonyMooz & Eon

File: 1378761923275.jpg (146KB, 1000x800px) Image search: [Google]

146KB, 1000x800px

>>25498630
Jesus christ my autocorrect is going psycho in this. It's not terrible, right?

>>25498300
>>25498509
>>25498630
cute pone thread becomes /tfg/?

I'm okay with this.
transformation expands dong

>>25498630
Dear Hasseneld Brothers,

I'm excited to write you guys a letter! I've never written a letter before! You guys are the ones who made me, right? Would that make you something like a stepdad? It's Hassenfeld BROTHERS, though, right? That means there's at least two of you! What are your names? Mine is Eon!

Dad said I should call you guys so you can help me since he's in the hospital! He told me to tell you my registration number is CAPQOC58294-01, and to give you guys that number if anything bad ever happened. He said he bought an enshore-ice policy in case he ever needed help taking care of me, and that you guys would help. He also said something about a rooting number on his bank account changing, but that you should try to send money anyway. He's been sick lately. I'm kind of worried. The doctors let me visit him, even though I have to walk home at night. Have you ever gotten sick? The other day I burped and puked in my mouth a little. It was gross!

Have a nice day!
Eon

PS Dad said he wanted to talk to you guys about jeans you guys make. I didn't know you made clothes!

>>25498948
I don't know whether to say that this is adorably sad or sadly adorable.

>>25498948
05/14/2119
FROM: St. Ignacious Memorial Hospital
CC: Dr. Bartholomew C. Jamison
TO: Hassenfeld Brothers Incorporated

Hassenfeld Brothers Incorporated,

I am writing on behalf of a charge at my hospital, A.H. NonyMooz. My patient has become completely incapable of speaking for himself. Sadly, this presents a unique challenge for us here, as he has no next-of-kin to notify in case of emergency. We do, however, recently became aware of a pony that he has attempted to legally named as his heir. Seeing as the recent Brumsfeld Vs. Kimberly court case recently drew to a close, we can now legally give rights to a Lasting Eon to make decisions for his gaurdian. However, Lasting Eon appears to be a minor, so in this case, we are contacting your corporation in lieu of him making decisions, as we feel you are the next best to contact.

We are also aware that A.H. NonyMooz also purchased a protection insurance policy in the event he can no longer provide for his foal. We are requesting to cash this insurance policy on his behalf to help pay for his medical expenses, as well as provide adequate lodging for his foal, as we fear he is returning to an empty home. We also have reason to suspect he may have recently also stolen food from a local grocers.

Please provide adequate correspondence about he insurance policy as soon as possible, as we would like to be partners in the health and future of our patient, as well as Lasting Eon's future.

Best Regards,
Dr. Bartholomew C. Jamison,
Head Director and Critical Care Floor Leader