The Bible is interesting and all, but what was God's tax policy?

>>10025263
Give unto Caeser what is Caeser's

>>10025264
/thread

>>10025263
Death

>>10025263
>>>/biz/

>>10025264
What did He ment by that?

>>10025264
literally this

>>10025263
Taxation is theft, and God's the biggest thief of all seeing as how he stole so much of my time just so I could read the dullest book in the history of literature. Seriously, each episode following the fickle God and his chosen people as they fight assorted unbelievers has been indistinguishable from the others. Aside from the gloomy imagery, the book's only consistency is its lack of excitement and ineffective use of prophecies, all to make miracles unmiraculous, to make action seem inert.

Perhaps the die was cast when God vetoed the idea of Satan directing the book; He made sure the book would never be mistaken for a work that meant anything to anybody, just ridiculously profitable cross promotion for His ideology. The Bible might be pro-Gnostic (or not), but it's certainly the most anti-Greek pantheon in its refusal of wonder, beauty and excitement. No one wants to face that fact. Now, thankfully, they no longer have to.

>a-at least the prose was good though

No!

The writing is dreadful, the book was terrible.
As I read, I noticed that every time a character had a child, the author wrote instead that the character "begat". I began marking on the back of an envelope every time that phrase was repeated. I stopped only after I had marked the envelope several dozen times.

I was incredulous. God's mind is so governed by cliches and dead metaphors that He has no other style of writing. Later, I read a loving, lavish review of the Bible by Joseph Smith. He wrote something to the effect of "if these kids are reading the Bible at 11 or 12, then when they got older they will go on to read golden plates". And he was quite right. He was not being ironic. When you read the Bible, you are, in fact, trained to read Joseph Smith.

>>10025971
god btfo

>>10025971
7/10

>>10025971
8/10 liked the meme references

jesus was a socialist

>>10025263
I didn't even vote for this guy

>>10025263
God actually does have a tax policy

Exodus 30:13-15

>13 This is what each one who is registered shall give: half a shekel according to the shekel of the sanctuary (the shekel is twenty gerahs), half a shekel as an offering to the LORD. 14 Each one who is registered, from twenty years old and upwards, shall give the LORD’s offering. 15 The rich shall not give more, and the poor shall not give less, than the half-shekel, when you bring this offering to the LORD to make atonement for your lives.

>>10026198
> The rich shall not give more, and the poor shall not give less.

Words to live by. As the Romans would say: "Fuck the poor!"

>>10026198
It's so badly written.

>>10026221
That was his policy in Exodus. God was raised by a conservative family and became a socialist in his later life.

>>10025263
turn the other cheek

>>10025971
nice

>>10026198
>after the Romans destroyed the Temple they made all the Jews regardless of their age pay this tax to the temple of Jupiter Capitolinus

>>10025264
I dun geddit, am dum

>>10026241
Pretty much this.
>Matthew 19:24; And again I say unto you, It is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle, than for a rich man to enter into the kingdom of God.

It is impossible for a camel to go through eye of a needle. Rich people don't go to heaven, full stop.

>>10027603

Right, and the mustard seed is the smallest of all seeds in the world, yeah?

>>10027613
Ya

>>10027282
Jesus says this in the Bible, it means "God doesn't concern himself with thr state, God transcends the state" because the truth is the truth regardless of those in power.

File: therealpepe.jpg (81KB, 960x874px) Image search: [Google]

81KB, 960x874px

>>10025640
>>10027282
It means pay your damn taxes to the state. Pay what you owe temporally because you must, but offer your spirit to Christ. Early Christians were already persecuted by the Jewish deep state for heresy, and didn't need to be giving local governors reason to crack down on them.

>>10025971
>t. mental midget who was defeated by the Old Testament

GJGE

>>10027603
Not impossible, just improbable.

>>10027659
The OT didn't defeat me, it's just shit and full of extraordinarily boring sections, like basically all of the articulations of Jewish law as well as the genealogy parts

File: baitesrb.png (26KB, 603x222px) Image search: [Google]

26KB, 603x222px

>>10027696
>greatest story ever told
>"just shit"

10/10 got me to reply, richie rich.

its called tithing

>>10027710
>the OT is the best story ever told
Nice reverse bait

>>10025264
get a load of this guy

>>10025263
Is this the best Bible review?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a7g9GONtznI

>>10025263
10% up front, sonny Jim, and give the man what 'e wants.