/brit/

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Hello?

coloured women don't register on my sexual radar

I've got a crush lads.
On a boy.
He's absolutely perfect, I fantasise about kissing him all the time.

>>75223780
*points towards you*

Anime

maisi-GOLUM-GOLUM

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sue

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Cheer bear

>>75223850
faggot

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anime

>>75223850
describe him

>>75223850
gaybo

Just got an e-mail to interview for a nice corporate bank job lads. $35k a year including benefits, vacation, and bonuses. Really hope I get this job.

>>75223850
bit gay
>>75223866
foy

i was meant to be a JAV idol but instead i'm a big ugly man

le sigh

>>75223863
post su666

>>75223780
some beak on him

>>75223850
faggot go to your containment board

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>>75223915
is just a group one

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before

>>75223878
Everything about him is perfect, his hair looks incredible no matter how it's styled, I just want to run my hands through it, he's got dark, intense eyes that you can get lost in, he's handsome, yet cute, a smile that just melts me, he's got such cute, kissable lips, and a phenomenal body that makes me feel a bit light headed. I bet his cock is nice too.

new gimmick: not being british

man never so happy about neet as when days like this in london, fuck working in these conditions

the state of that last post in the old thread

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>>75223956
after
>>75223959
>>>/lgbt/

>>75223975
*spits out tea*
blimey!

>>75223959
when was the last time you had sex?

>>75223959
get a fucking grip

>>75224009
41 years ago

Elizabeth Cameron Turner's favourite book is Brave New World

a qt and good taste

why do british people love using the words marvellous and brilliant?

BOUGHT A WHITE LEATHER SUITE LAST MONTH.....IT HAS CHARCOAL FABRIC ON THE SIT DOWN PART BUT REST IS WHITE LEATHER....WAS IN THE SALE REDUCED FROM 5K TO 2.5K.....ITS A MASSIVE CORNER UNIT THAT SEATS 7....IT CAME ALL ON THE BOX AND WRAPPED IN PLASTIC.....I NOTICED A DAY AFTER IT ARRIVED....ONE OF THE SEATS HAD A HOLE LIKE FAG BURN IN IT...BUT WAS CLEVERLY DONE COVERED UP WITH THE SAME FABRIC :wanker: NEVER FOOLED ME....I RANG EM UP AND SENT EM A PHOTO....THEY SAID SORRY ABOUT THAT SIR WE WILL SEND OUT A NEW BOTTOM CUSHION TOMORROW.... I SAID YA WONT LIKE....YA CAN SEND IT OUT AND TAKE 500 OFF THE PRICE TOO....OR YA CAN COME ROUND TOMORROW AND TAKE THE LOT BACK YA CHEEKY FUCKERS :unlike:

SAID WE WILL GET BACK TO YOU IN THE MORNING :wanker:

PISS TAKING CUNTS

>>75223975
been doing it my whole life lad

can't decide whether I want to pan fry or grill my burgers tonight lads

a conundrum indeed

>>75223959
You just described me

Uhh where u live

>>75223959
>dark, intense eyes
ah, not me then aha
>>75223987
never had a job but i like doing diy or something in the garden on warm days
wouldn't mine doing that, but yeah fuck sitting in some stuffy office

>>75224038
screeching

>>75224003
this is the power of lighting and angles

>>75224048
don't think I've used those words for a very long time

>>75224041
probably the only book she's ever read

it's required reading in pretty much every high school in the country

>>75224009
Never

>>75224048
don't think ive heard them say marvelous often

>>75223959
think this lad's just described me

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Which eReader did you buy?

I Have loads of anglo GFs scottish, nglish, australian what have you. Would take a cute fragile 20 years asian any day of he week. Biology literally doesn't care about irrelevant constructs such as ethnicity. The dick gets harder abd the cum is more abundant. It is what it is. But of course it's all theoretical to you if you shag less than 5 new girls a year.

>>75223959
>dark eyes
ah yes, a so called nigger

>>75224041
>good taste
literally find it on any best books list

>>75224130
He's as white as the driven snow

>>75224101
ah right
this explains things

when you don't have sex, your body/brain starts to get confused
first you'll start thinking you're gay and want to shag a "nice bloke"
shag a female prostitute as soon as possible, before you go down the deep end

Nowhere else makes me laugh as hard as this place.
And yes I am laughing AT you

trap remix of smb64 music is decent

>>75224168
I've always like boys though.

>>75224142
look, i know you're the typical autistic little contrarian that shits up this site, but something being popular isn't a bad thing

Keep a low profile in my grey trackie

>>75224226
no
you're just confused
shag a woman
it'll fix you

>>75224111
Kobo

>>75224168
>shag a female prostitute as soon as possible, before you go down the deep end
FONT

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My fucking daughter was raped in Algeria on holiday. She has a picture of the guy. I'll fucking murder him.

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>>75223780
Alri lad
>*he says while giving you the benevolent look an alpha gives to an inferior member of the species he nevertheless feels compassion for*

business idea: global cooling

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>>75224226
pedo cunt
reporting this to GCHQ

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STOP TELLING THE TRUTH

>>75224113
im saying this with complete sincerity; i genuinely consider you more mentally fucked than tim
i think if you went to a psychologist youd be diagnosed with something on the same day

so fucking hot

>>75224247
Girls don't even get my dick hard, I hate them

>>75224144
>dark eyes
no he bloody well isnt

don't like bo burnham

>>75224267
Oh nice

>>75224277
Algeria has zero tourists my little lad

>>75224279
how tall are you? I'd break your nose with ease you little scrote

>>75224318
yes they do
they're just not trying hard enough
you have complete control over yourself

>They want us to turn on our muslim neighbours

I see this argument all the time, and I think it's the biggest load of horse shit I've ever seen. All ISIS cares about is the body count, they couldn't careless if you beat Rasheed to death or let him fuck your wife

>>75224348
He's 5'8

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Why are so many Mancunians parading around with 'I love My Chemical Romance' banners? Poor timing surely?

should I stay on antidepressants forever? I don't see the bonus of coming of them

>>75224230
doubt she's read any other Huxley

>>75224335
Yeah, it's a pretty good product.

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>>75224279
you don't greentext action posting

>>75224294
thats not even what they're saying kek
leftists are literally mentally ill

>>75224345
She's not a tourist, she's an explorer, travelling the world, and now she's a wreck, stuck in her room because of what that evil bastard did to her.

Take me out tonight
This ship of fools i'm on will sink

Is requesting an early interview time good?

I figured it shows that you're a morning person, and that being the first to be interviewed has it's benefits.

http://astronaut.io
just plays youtube videos titled IMG_xxx and DSC_xxx with less than 10 views

ahh yess I know what, I'll reply to it!

The Algerian has his fishing rod out again

>>75224366
this is my joke and I will see you in court.

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anyone know of jobs where you go away for year(s) at a time (not the army)

>>75224376
the bonus is you don't have to remember to take them and you don't have any bad side effects when you forget

>>75224331
He is, got dark hair with hints of red and beautiful white skin.

>>75224428

Merchant navy

>>75224428
the navy

>>75224387
Sorry lad. I'm not familiar with all the gimmicks yet.

>>75224349
I'm happy being gay though lad. No girls has ever made me feel the same way a guy does.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j4gm2dRjy7g

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Gormless ugly twat

>>75224453
>>75224459
seaman may be your thing lads but not for me

>>75224376
been on mine for a year now
hope to come off by the end of the year

>>75224435
blind gaylord that fancies a non-white that would probably kick your head in if you told him

>>75224428
English teacher

>>75224474
but you've never had sex so you don't really know?

>>75224486
the air force

>>75224481
Would smash his stupid paki face in without hesitation if it still existed.
Going to take DMT and mushrooms, open the third eye and travel to the dimension his soul now exists in and twat the bent cunt

>>75224409
Good site. will be using this alot. i really like soft non erotic voyeurism, like overhearring people on the bus. this really satisfies that need.

>>75224428
oil rig?
>>75224496
nary a letter

swansea bomb scare turned out to be a hoax
some 22 year old thought it would be a good idea to plant a fake bomb in the city centre the day after a legit terrorist attack
absolute runt

>>75224348
Same as Connor

business idea: tall dutch gf

>>75224474
what about your parents? Do you enjoy making a show of them? selfish cunt

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>Going to take DMT and mushrooms, open the third eye and travel to the dimension his soul now exists in and twat the bent cunt

>>75224494
I would NEVER fancy a non-white
>>75224506
I've sucked cock

>>75224474
Lads we've taken the ironic gayposting gimmick too far, now this poor fella is actually gay lmao

business idea: soft non-erotic voyeuristic dutch bf

scots. they live among you

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YWEr-nmhT9g

>>75224558
been there don't do it

>>75224567
>I've sucked cock
so?
you claim to be gay and yet you've never had sex
you're clearly not gay

>>75224567
you already do, bender

>>75224496
My taxi driver was telling me about this, along with some of his mathematical theories, different dimensions and frequency waves, oh and how the plasma energy in our brain is as powerful as the sun.

>>75224496
horse dung.

>>75224486

Ambassador

>>75224535
>>75224521
>>75224495
>>75224459
>>75224453
don't like the sound of any of these ;/

want to suck a willy

>>75224558
need a dafne schippers gf

is it just one person doing the gay gimmick?

>>75224294
woah woah woah, who even mentioned terrorism?

that guy is a serious BIGOT

What's your autistic hobby?

Need a gf to sleep with at night

Weezer is a shit band

When are we going to deal with the elephant in the room?

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IMPORTANT

>>75224640
*pants accidentally fall down in front of you*
*lack of underwear can be plainly seen*

>>75224680
quite like trains

*blows a raspberry on your tummy*

>>75224670
most ""gimmicks"" on /brit/ are one guy

>>75224294
doubt it, Islamists probably watch tons of porn

>>75224563
How have I done that you thick, gormless paddy twat. And to be quite honest I wouldn't care if I had
>>75224601
alri then fuck me and we'll see how I feel afterwards

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lads what's to stop you booking a hotel/airbnb for one person and just sneaking a guest in to stay and split the cost?

>be brit
>eat shit
nonce
>>75224446
>>75224573

haha look the mentally ill bloke exploded himself and some others

>>75224628

Prisoner in a a foreign country

Alright guys, if this post gets 10 (you)s, I'll tell you the ulimate secret to get super hot girls. Otherwise, I'll jus go have dinner.

Put your mother in a straight jacket you punk ass white boy. Come here and tell me that; I'll fuck you in the ass you punk ass white boy. You faggot, you can't touch me - you ain't man enough. I'll eat your asshole alive, bitch. Fuck you hoe, come say to my face, l'll fuck you in front of everybody. You bitch, come on you bitch, you scared coward; you're not man enough to fuck with me. You won't last two minutes in my world, bitch. Look at you, scared now hoe. Scared you little white pussy, scared of the real man. I'll fuck you till you love me, faggot.

Lads you ever do something as a joke and then take it too far and too seriously and refuse to stop doing it?

>>75224713
chebs are so much better in bras

got a pay raise today lads
wahey

>>75223959
benders out

>>75224680
I buy shitty furniture in charity shops then sell it for ~4 times the price on etsy aha

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>will my pony recognise my voice in hell?
>will he still be blind or do they go by smell?

>>75224728
>alri then fuck me and we'll see how I feel afterwards
you don't have to ask people on the internet for sex

just go to a gay bar/club
it's piss easy

>>75224750
nonce

>>75224715
all me

>>75224760
Did that with pretending to be gay for a laugh now I have a bf desu

NIGERIA

Literally no better feeling than having a pair of tits in your face

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what did channel 4 mean by this

>>75224704
obviously you'd not be wearing underwear if your pants just fell down you idiot

wing chun training session today lads

i'm turning into a hand to hand combat machine

>My brother just got pulled on M6 Toll by what he is saying is military police, checking every vehicle and checking everyone's ID

>Intelligence services now believe that Salman Abedi who detonated the nail bomb in the foyer of the venue was a ‘mule’ using a device made by someone else

It's fucking happening

>>75224805
Willy up the bum stimulating your prostate

>>75224807
radical centrism

>>75224760
doing that with being a virgin

>>75224805
>tfw will never experience this
>tfw will never lick a pussy

>>75224827
don't like underwear that slaggy

>>75224728
>he thinks being gay isn't being a complete failure and embarrassment to his parents
The jews really did a number on you

>Northern Ireland is the safest place in all of the West
feels gooooooood

>>75224826
i feel like getting pulled by the MP when you're not a crim would be pretty cool

love those Wood Rocket interviews on youtube

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The only one I see, has carved her way in to me

Everyone has been burned before, everybody knows the pain

>>75224885
It isn't though, and my parents are failures, my father is a degenerate
Do NOT say that is why I am gay.

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>pass the salt anon would you?

>>75224864
>lick a pussy
little beta-boy twat

>>75224901
*Carbombs the statistics*

>>75224728
bet your dad wishes you were dead

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>>he thinks being gay isn't being a complete failure and embarrassment to his parents
>The jews really did a number on you

>>75224927
I wish he was dead

1 irish car bomb my good man

>>75224912
definitely party the reason

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How many days do you have to be on antidepressants until you don't feel tired and sick all the time?

>>75224923
*nobody dies*

>>75224921
Literal faggot detected

>>75224959
stop taking antidepressants
go outside
do exercise
just be yourself

>>75224919
she has a black kid

>>75224921
why do you say that?
don't care if it is though desu, i would like to do it

>>75224575
>ironic gayposting

always hated that.

>>75224959
first fortnight was hell for me

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>Everyone has been burned before, everybody knows the pain

>the queer has daddy issues
I AM SO SHOCKED BY THIS REVELATION

bet he was molested too

Shipping centre in Swansea got evacuated today because of a bomb scare.
Not surprised desu. You walk down some parts of Swansea and it's like you're in fucking Islamabad

>>75224959
you could try a different one

If its not on the 6 o'clock then it ain't news

>>75224959
About a month.

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>>75224959
>Actually taking antidepressants

It ain't gonna end well boy, especially those SSSI or whatever

>>75224919
she has, by a large portion, much more muscle than me on her thighs.

>>75224943
??? jews dont like fags

>>75224959
stop taking anti depressants and go into the forest

the forest is the white man's natural habitat and thusly where he feels best

ideally you should live in the forest

imaging being such an emaciated americanised little twat that you go around calling people "fags" and "faggots"

fucking grim

>>75224997
I actually was not molested

>>75224998
Not being edgy but some parts of Swansea could really do with a bomb going off and starting over again

Absolute dive

*waddles towards the bar*
*places one cheek on one stool*
*places other cheek on another stool*
HEY MAAAAN GET ME ONE IRISH CARBOMB

>there doesn't exist a single mentally stable homosexual that grew up in a loving, nuclear family and wasn't molested as a child, IN THE ENTIRE WORLD
this... this makes me think

>>75225059
Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha it's just a bit of banter lad don't get upset

>>75225019
I'm actually on those, have been for months, what's wrong with them? I'm scared.

>>75225080
there isn't you bent twat

imaging being such a faggot that I get triggered by being using the word fag

fucking grim

>>75225059
Faggot is frequently used in Northern Ireland because we don't eat the gay food and all the English colloqualisms for homos sound homo in and of themselves.

>>75225102
>faggot
fuck off yank

>>75225087
should have said bro instead of lad
would have really cooked him good

Fucking hate the Irish so much

>>75225101
>the yank can't read
I AM SHOCKED

>>75225087
Fuck off pawn

>>75225093
They fuck with your serotonin Inhibitors

>>75225028
>>75225059
>>75225087
>>75225102
>>75225107
>>75225110
FUCK OFF FAGGOTS

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>stop taking anti depressants and go into the forest
>the forest is the white man's natural habitat and thusly where he feels best
>ideally you should live in the forest

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*hides a smirnoff ice in your shoe*

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>why no, i am not gay

>>75225136
gaylord

>>75225155
And what does that do?

>>75225172
what's point of drinking flavoured vodka srs is it good? just seems like a waste of money

>>75225188
manages the symptoms of depression

I fainted at work today

I must must have looked a right idiot but at least I got some sweet, sweet attention

My manager took me into a room and we talked.
It was probably because I skipped lunch but she kept asking about medication so I told her the antidepressants were the only new thing I was on

I got back to work after that despite being offered breaks and food

People asked how I was, hope I didn't say anything stupid or look stupid

I just know that I was sweating heavily and I was told my lips turned white
I became pale and other generic stuff

Does anyone realistically see their life ending in suicide? I don't think I'll ever graduate college or live a normal life. The entirety of it has been a constant state of agitation and confusion and deadening apathy.

>>75224959
its a gradual change over months, if you want immediate short term change do lsd with good friends

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do the prozzies in amsterdam let you kiss them while you're fucking?

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>>75225136

They are really going overdrive on the whole Muslims are peaceful victims thing this time

>>75225201
it actually tastes good, literally like a soft drink, but that's not why people buy smirnoff ice. either you're drinking it because you're 15 and don't like that taste of alcohol or you're buying it to ice people with

>>75225233
think about it often but i have no realistic means of doing it

>>75225225
Well I am more depressed than I ever have been, even with an increased dose

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>>75225229
>hope I didn't look stupid

>>75225259
vodka tastes alright anyway though? especially if you mix it yourself, just seems like you're paying more money for them to mix it for you?

Also, the fainting happened right after I easedropped on the tranny's conversation again

Turns out all her housemates are trans too and some are insane, threatened a GAP or something

>>75225233
Yes, told my GP this

>>75225299
screaming and howling
state of this paki freak

Rorkes aren't mentally stable.

>>75225233
Yeah I've figured for ages now that's how it'll go, like >>75225273 though I haven't got a real way of doing it, I just try strangling myself or stabbing myself to death, haven't made it work yet

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>Rorkes aren't mentally stable.

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>>75225233
yea but not until my family hates me

>>75225341
>Britians
A yank made this

>>75225355
you self-identify as a Rorke

your condition

HATE:
pakis
irish
wogs

LOVE:
pints
white brits
the french

>>75225402
what the fuck are you on about

Realised there's something totally repellent about my personality but not sure what it is

>>75225341
me in the bottom right

>>75225393
yeah it was me

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TRUTH

>>75225405
racist fart

>>75225439
no its humans actually

>>75225304
straight vodka tastes disgusting. especially if it's room temperature

>>75225439
fucks sake

>>75225376
same

>>75225327
I look a little better now

Admittedly my hair sucks most of the time and I didn't shave today

>>75225416
y'know

>>75224383
>>75224335
>>75224267
>>75224111
fuck off dave

>>75225456
no its biological life actually

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Ah yes, the Welsh

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6KVXKdoGQ7w
>Get muh snow-nigga books n shiiieeet

I think varg has finally lost it

>>75225467
pics

>>75225439
There is literally no refuting this

>>75224428
prison inmate

Free accommodation, food, and healthcare provided

>>75225439
*kills you like a man*

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Cannot underrate a pleasant shit

>>75225499
moar

>>75225506
They're coming, my glasses are in the post

>>75225439
fucking hate MEN
edit: whoa, whats with the downvotes, I obviously meant only white men

going to call the wifes son lysander https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XsW4FoRzhQw

Will never have kids.

dont have the courage required for killing me self

>>75225576
are you new, straight from reddit?

>>75225183
*puts you in the accident & emergency

addicted to wanking

my wifes son lost his virginity before i did

>>75225616
get an onahole

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>>75225555
Nothing special desu

>>75225614
*it's closed down because of tory cuts*

>>75225608
Steralised yourself too?>>75225614

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>>75225439

>>75225616
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=miGUnKWcYeo

>poleaboo is back
fuck!

>>75225629
not a spacker

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>>75224279
i could tear you from limb to limb
only thing you outsize me in is that fucking schnozz on your face

got this weird tension in my front teeth like they're being pushed together like a retainer does

internet speed is fucking pathetic

4mb per second dl speed

fucking shoot me

SSRIs are ZOG mind control pills
benzos are the pills you want

>>75225667
i got 2 in japan

>>75225633
not a fan of the marker pen brow, its only one step away from Romanian gypsy.

>>75225643
ah thank fuck
never thought i'd say the words, but i'm glad poleaboo is here [not blown up / arrested]

>>75225643
fucking kek no
I just hate them

TOO

DARN

HOT

>>75225668
Why are you in the women's toilet?

>>75225708
Grow up

met a bloke who was in elementary school with me when going home, he was getting bullied at lot back then
turned into a meathead

>>75225684
*shoots you in slow motion*

>taking any pills at all
don't do this

>>75225700
>lads i definitely pulled in japan when i went to japan that's why i love japanese women love shagging japs
>*smash cut to anon wanking using a plastic child's vagina in his hotel room*

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98KB, 720x866px

Bollocks are drenched

>>75225762
t. knower

>>75225692
give em to me then

>>75225730
Piss off you little rodent

Business idea: gonna get a slaggy uk gf before the brexit hits

>>75225751
>elementary school
FOY

I fainted at work today

I must must have looked a right idiot but at least I got some sweet, sweet attention

My manager took me into a room and we talked.
It was probably because I skipped lunch but she kept asking about medication so I told her the antidepressants were the only new thing I was on

I got back to work after that despite being offered breaks and food

People asked how I was, hope I didn't say anything stupid or look stupid

I just know that I was sweating heavily and I was told my lips turned white
I became pale and other generic stuff

>>75225665
>>75225704
Awww, you're too sweet!

Taking the rail replacement bus service home, could be about 2 hours

>>75225763
I pulled absolutely no punches when I went to japan. fucking battered at least 20 nips

>>75225701
Eyebrows are my test for if a girl is gf material or not.

Anything drawn on and/or over-exaggerated is sign of a slag or a vapid immature girl. The key is well-kept but natural 'brows.

>>75225751
ah yes bullied kid had the last laugh hehe

>>75225790
*smugly winks at you on our deathbeds while I'm surrounded by loved ones and you're all alone*

>>75225799
you fuck off

>>75225751
>bloke
>elementary
>bullied
>lot
>meathead

These are English words, Pierre

never reply to me again

>>75225725
unisex sweetie xx

>>75225779
not londonderry is it

>>75223780
>>75224277
>>75224279
So tell me /brit/, why is your thread littered with pics of Nassim?

>>75225762
I'm currently taking

25mg Cypro
8mg Estrogen
150mg magnesium
50mg Biotin
1.25mg Finasteride
50mg Sertaline

>>75225815
nah he just has muscles
stillhas a monstruosity of a face

>>75225763
literally the reality to an extent (i did also unironically pull)

>>75225809
its not the best test ever but in a pinch i expect it will do.

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20KB, 631x185px

>>75225834
Nah, says derry right there lad learn to read

>>75225816
Woah, you really convinced me now, what a fool I was
I'll be dead soon anyway

>>75225851
>literally admitting to being a literal actual 100% genuine NONCE

>>75225826
hitler was an immigrant

>>75225839
Who?

>>75225826
>REEEEEE pointing out the negatives of mass immigration is literally fascist. 600 jews did in the Holodormor, never forget

>>75225842
yes and you fainted today
VERY healthy

>>75225864
i'm not even prod

Why has he posted it twice

>>75225910
Good lad

baby boomers: conservatives
gen x: moderate leftists
millennials: far-right
gen z: communists

>>75225892
It could be the Sertaline alone or just because I skipped lunch

It happened to me back when I was 17 too in Sixth Form,.it was an STD presentation

>>75225817
FOY

>>75225826
>every single instance of mass immigration in human history has meant the host nation's native people were all but wiped out of existence
>immigration is good