Mr-Jackpot edition
tfw no gf
first for nignogs
am i gay?
god bless america
my home sweet home
which post is clackmyass-tier, you big bully
this is why we should reply to posts we're replying to it gets confusing if we don't
*dabs on em*
kaitlin
what is wrong with this utter fucking retard
i completely agree
thanks for agreeing
>\we should reply to posts we're replying to it gets confusing if we don't
I'm probably the best poster in /cum/
There isn't much competition
>>75202093
He's white.
>"anon come sit with me hehe :3"
wut do
>>\
pretty sure there wasn't a backslash in my post honey :^)
>>75202122
dont know
haha no problem, i appreciate a good idea
>>75202122
cum in her tummy
>>75202122
not interested in women or asians
Check out this pasta, /cum/
Man my wife did the same thing. She was going on this big work trip but I knew she was full of shit. I thought maybe if I get could her some kind of super sex toy she might not go through with it. I think she really was going there for work but had also planned on banging some other dude.
Anyway I went to this sex shop and asked for the best dildo they had. They dude behind the counter said well I just got one of these check it, the voodoo dick. He had this fancy wooden box with voodoo dick written on the side, he then said "voodoo dick the counter". I shit you not this huge voice activated dildo drone came hovering out of the box and started hammering the counter. Fucking take my money I bought it, $1900.
Anyway I give it to my wife, tell her to say "voodoo dick the door", damn thing nearly pounded a hole in the door.
So yeah a few days later she leaves for her trip, it's like a 4 hour drive, and I get s call that she's been arrested. Turns out she got bored on her drive, she's wearing a skirt, pulls her panties aside and says "voodoo dick my pussy". Well the voodoo dick jackhammers my wife's goodies and she can't control the car. She also can't stop the voodoo dick. Whoops.
So sure enough she gets pulled over on suspicion of DWI. The cops walks up and she says "sir I'm so sorry I can't make this thing stop. ". The cop says what the fuck is going on and she explains it's a voodoo and she can't stop it. The cop then skeptically says "voodoo dick my ass!".
>>75202122
>wearing shoes inside
Bye
the no ass girl stares at me
maybe because she likes me or maybe because i look at her too.
i hope is the former
>>75202155
garbage
>>75202155
fuck off dad
my pizza still isn't here im fucking hungry
update: finished making my tea
>>75202167
typical yuropoor
>>75202181
>>75202192
It cracked me up!
stole some Chicano's pizza, lmao
I hope everyone remembers to report avatar posters
>>75202203
if you wear shoes inside you're an animal
>>75202202
keep me posted
You couldn't have stolen my pizza if we're in different states
>>75202197
How long have you been waiting?
>>75202207
wow rude :/
>>75202217
shut the fuck up imbecile
i don't see any characters from the series avatar the last airbender being posted here, sweetie. ::^)
>>75202240
it's like 20 minutes late
>he thinks I havent mastered cross country teleportation
I give you $200 dollars, what do you buy?
>>75202247
I won't you fucking mongrel
>>75202236
He must have stolen someone else's pizza then. Still rude.
Haven't posted here in about 2 weeks. Hi boys.
Long brown hair with hips and an unconventionally attractive face is objectively the best female form
>>75202263
kys you fucking racist
>>75202265
I bought a bottle of this stuff at christmas and now I'm seeing it everywhere on the 'net. are you one of the jewish scientists?
>>75202265
kraken rum is really cheap.
fuck niggers
>>75202280
haha thanks
Tired of these white people stealing my pizzas
>>75202265
New headphones maybe. I wouldn't buy alcohol with it.
fuck cumskins
>what year is it
ive been drinking kraken rum since the first season of true detective.
niggers? i hate em
white people? i like em
reddit? i love it
for dummies books are actually really useful for broaching new subjects. they typically have very good info. don't tell anyone, that's my favorite secret
fuck shitskins
I'm considering calling the pizza place
FUCK the white working class
>muh terrorism
>muh mexicans
>muh feminazis
kys cletus
1% milk isn't really milk
*cuts his phone line*
heheheh
Nice try commiefornian but my pizza just arrived (I still tipped the deliveryman of course)
>>75202372
these are legitimate complaints
o boy
Have some more soccer /cum/.
>sports
i'll pass
>>75202385
Grow a dick.
stop reminding me of spore it makes me think of disappointment which makes me think about my entire life
>>75202390
i already told you baseball is the number one sport here
>>75202406
shit they're not legitimate complaints anymore. how'd you do that?
>>75202385
No, they are not.
see that mountain?
>>sports
>i'll pass
>MUH TAXES
>fuck socialist OBONGO and his healthcare
/dead/
>>75202421
The Matterhorn?
>>75202406
>>75202420
>>75202442
I'll remind you to grow a dick when you're getting bombed. I'll remind you to grow a dick when you're getting beheaded. I'll remind you to grow a dick when you're jobless. I'll remind you to grow a dick when you're castrated. I'll remind you to grow a dick when you're silenced. I'll remind you to grow a dick when you decide to grow a dick.
This is why /dixie/ is popular and we're not. Because of dickless Californian faggots like you. Grow a dick.
>>75202406
other guy is right
get bombed you worthless nigger lmao
>>75202421
>>75202421
already climbed it
sorry zeruda
I want to plant my dong between Tammy's thong
>Obama is a KENYAN MUSLIM
>muh latte salute
>muh spicy mustard
>muh head scarf
>Michelle is not a woman
>fuck FASCIST COMMUNIST OBONGO telling my kid what to eat at lunch and shiet
just stumped by index toe and im almost positive i broke it
>>75202542
wish someone would bomb this thing instead of little kids
>>75202544
can i suck on it?
>>75202542
Truck of piss pls
cooking some steak, burgers and asparagus buds
How dare Obongo eat spicy mustard!!
So arrogant and condescending!!
MAGA
>>75202475
I prefer the Matterhorn at Disneyland
>>75202542
TURN UP
>>75202625
pour-quoi
kys trumpflakes
What's the best way to dispose of an uppity nigger?
goddamn buds, Twin peaks is back and its 10/10
>>75202574
*invites myself over*
looks good bud
>>75202390
Nice fanfic where povertykick isn't a sport for girls and where it's popular in the US.
>>75202652
a good lynching
>>75202655
HelllooooOOooo jackpot
Should I drink some beer tonight, or wait to drink rum tomorrow?
>>75202574
>pre-made burger patties
>all that weird seasoning shit on the steaks
They should've never gave you niggers meat. Enjoy your poverty slop
>>75202679
You should drink a glass of milk with every meal and never touch alcohol again.
>>75202679
wait until the weekend and then have some in moderation
>>75202652
Collide them with a downity nigger
>>75202093
Spotted the durka
Stop doing you-know-what
>>75202652
An NBA contract
>>75202697
clackyourass knows whats good
Do acting like a retarded leftist is just a gimmick some kids here are doing right
>>75202014
>tfw no black gf
>>75202265
8/10 eth
It's hard to be a communist, when you hate the white working class.
>>75202770
kys trumpflake
>>75202263
Damn, forgot those existed, pinnacle of entertainment right here
>>75202770
Acting leftist ironically is a poor gimmick. Only the most uncreative and poor posters engage in this behavior
Yea it's definitely some shit kid looking for replies.
>>75202696
>p-people can't have different opinions
>it must be bait
Did I hurt your fee fees, trumpflake?
Ironic lefty posting his /brit/ tier, doubt my /cum/ would stoop that low.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IGUboLZx3Tk
really like this song, iIBQH
>tfw your opinions trigger trumpflakes
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f4oRAdbIAm8
cute video of varg playing with his kids
>>75202896
>ywn be homeschooled by varg
the worst feeling
No Trump!
No KKK!
No fascist USA!
>>75202896
Why arent they murdering immigrants?
>>75202896
Why is Varg speaking some Scandinavian language? I thought he was French
>oh shit he said I was pretending to be retarded better show him that I actually am
>ywn have your children fight eachother in your backyard
>>75202945
>>75202945
thats Louis Cachet
Sorry for invading your safe space, trumpflake.
>>75202923
Fuck Drumbf
>uneducated lower class whites unite
>this is the result
>>75202945
Yes, Varg is a common French name and I believe he is from the Loire valley.
>>75202967
children are for cucks
So is this leftypol wannabe a chicano, black or just the average white commiefornian
Going with commiefornian
>>75203033
Probably west coast, certainly a bad poster
Wish I didn't feel sexual attraction to women.
So which one supplied barron with the autism genes?
>>75203060
>wanting to be a faggot
Looks like the alt-right is dead.
I can't wait for the democratic super majority in 2020.
>>75203033
>>75203056
getting triggered wont make it stop, trumpflakes.
i didn't say I wanted to be gay...
stop posting gooks
Is there a place on earth which has spring weather year round? I didnt expect it to get so hot.
I have racist thoughts sometimes
>>75202561
sure, its hurts to much to apply ice so that would be incredibly thoughtful of you
>I can't wait for the democratic super majority in 2020.
so he is retarded and doesn't know what super majority means
reckon this is the first election he's ever watched, strikes me as a 19 year old faggot with che guevera shirts and #feelthebern stickers
i want a gf
>>75203146
it's 80 degrees here right now
way too fucking hot
The butthurt never ends.
experiment
https://t.me/joinchat/AAAAAA4DqdlGAtShnpJxow
>>I can't wait for the democratic super majority in 2020.
>so he is retarded and doesn't know what super majority means
>reckon this is the first election he's ever watched, strikes me as a 19 year old faggot with che guevera shirts and #feelthebern stickers
>>75203198
I aint clicking that
>80 degrees
>hot
A topic controversal?
>>75203203
it's a telegram link.
>>75203221
can't fool me hacker man
>>75203213
stop laughing
this is too much for me
>30 degrees
>cold
Reply to me if you're a pimp
>>75203232
Sorry, but it seems I did. Just by seeing the link, you're now hacked.
>mfw an oregonian and montanan thought they knew what hot weather was
Regretting unfiltering Fist of Flames already
You're a player hater
>>75203265
I'm not a pimp
>was -7 yesterday
>12 degrees today
hmmmmm
>my idea of superiority involves sweltering in extreme heat
no thanks
>Celcius
my best female friend is really cute.
>>75203330
this proves it
global warming is real
>faeranheight
>>75203358
can i fuck her
Obama was the greatest president since Jimmy Carter.
do you think elephants that are chained up have dreams of someone setting them free and taking them back home?
>hey guys we should make 32 degrees as freezing and 212 boiling XDDDD that'll show em were different and special
>>75203388
why
like my card?
foxes a q t
about to play some overwatch ama
>>75203456
do you mean ana
>>75203456
whats your favourite subreddit
>redditwatch
>>75203456
why aren't you playing the far superior tf2
lets play tf2 bois
>>75203463
no but she's my favourite support
>>75203466
/r/neoliberal
>>75203470
I haven't found tf2 fun since 2009
>>75203470
tf2 died a long time ago
>>75203456
>stale meta lasting close to seven months
>4 out of 6 hero spots are chosen by the meta every single game
wow so exciting
>>75203485
um haha don't feel like stomping a bunch of noobs today
>>75203496
me playing a game is enough to breathe life into it
what the HECK
>>75203456
Is overwatch a game where people watch television until all but one have fallen asleep and the winner is the person who is still awake?
>>75203529
don't you have community servers lol
ban porn
i sprained my ankle when i was 17 and it's still giving me problems
>>75203529
man the logo is so bad.
>>75203543
>germanic """""""humor""""""""
>tf2
>memewatch
ill be playing wolf: ET, the real mans FPS
>>75203573
fite me quake
>>75203529
there are 1000 people ahead of me
>>75203543
no it's an fps game with cute girls
once i sprained my ankle so bad that i lay on the sidewalk almost passing out because of the pain.
5 minutes later i was running again, i think i have super ankles or something, may be the double jointedness.
>>75203194
Thank you France.
>>75203568
>>"""""germanic"""""
>>75203606
shut up maricon
>>75203087
I don't think he's autistic he acts like a lot of 10 year olds but he looks 16 and dresses like he's 30.
>/r/neoliberal
what did he mean by this
>>75203590
you play as well? there are a lot of finnish players on both of those games for some reason, also the best fraggera are from finland too
>>75203638
>>>""""what""""???
trump > rand > mcafee > everything else
>>75203656
yes, really enjoyed qc, too bad my gpu took its final breath recently so on a gtx 650 now, gotta wait for vega
>>75203654
It's one of those reddit parody things, it's all socialists who pretend they are avid neoliberals as a joke or something
celtics making a come back
>going to reddit
>telling us about it
>>75203771
if they tie/win the series, I'll be ecstatic
>>75203739
displeased the only /cum/ poster in my city is a redditor
>following qt actress
>first time I google her she's in the late 20s
>next time I check she's 33
>next time I check she's 36
>now she is nearly 40 years old
i want to be the flash and travel thru time
>displeased the only /cum/ poster in my city is a redditor
there's literally nothing wrong with reddit
>there's literally nothing wrong with reddit
i wish i wasnt autistic, probably gonna end my life when im 25
>>75203866
just bought this book
pleases my autism greatly
>>75203884
save this cap and post it in every /cum/ thread
>using reddit flags
>complaining about redditors
>>75203867
there is
i was reading though some emulation related posts and someone starts saying this is why capitalism is bad
>>75203884
and he plays overwatch and likes kpop as well
insufferable little twat, would glass him if he ever agreed to a fight irl
>>75203899
just did
STOP FIGHTING RIGHT NOW!
>>75203935
t. reddit
Bought an ebook textbook for my class off some guy on PayPal
Account got shut today, says i need to contact them because of that purchase
What do? Pretty sure it's illegal to buy copy right material what do i say
I think I want a chicano gf lads
what's wrong with me?
REMINDER: there is nothing wrong with regularly visiting reddit and listening to kpop
used reddit for one day several years ago and they banned my immediately for hating women
>>75203886
seems like something I would like because I like inforgraphics, but would never admit to owning it
I browsed reddit when I was 16. Don't remember it being as bad as it is.
This was funny though.
>>75203974
whos this alpha
>>75203946
say you thought it was legit or something
and also
>paying for pirated goods
shig
did he even send it?
>>75203960
has lots of great colored data maps, even of really specific things like the other jobs musicians have
>>75203944
STOP. DON"T
reminder
https://www.reddit.com/r/WomenHate/
>>75203995
>japanese men
>alpha
>>75203998
Yea dude photocopied all the pages on impossible to find textbook
>>75204014
1. he's korean
2. why do you hate asians so much
>>75203995
Some Korean politician: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kim_Moo-sung
>>75204014
its a korean you avatarfag god i hate you
>>75204006
wew wtf that's look mentally unstable
>>75201968
HELLOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
watching joe dirt
>>75204020
well hopefully you didn't have money in the account
thought it was some store or something
lesson learned about paying with paypal
>>75204045
cum lol
At night I'm driving in your car
Pretending that we'll leave this town
We're watching all the street lights fade
And now you're just a stranger's dream
I took your picture from the frame
And now you're nothing like you seem
Your shadow fell like last night's rain
Got a nice new fun coming in the mail tommroow
>>75203904
you couldn't beat up an armless man
>>75204060
what makes you say that
>>japanese men
>>alpha
Joining army after university. What do /cum/ students plan on doing after they graduate
wish i lived on my own with a big garage and a nice shop
would be comfy
I DON'T MIND SPENDING EVERYDAY
OUT ON YOUR CORNER IN THE POURING RAIN
LOOK FOR THE GIRL WITH A BROKEN SMILE
ASK HER IF SHE WANTS TO STAY A WHILE
>>75204090
going back to school
>>75204090
Why after? Or do you want to be an officer?
*makes you squirm*
i want to be an alpha male but i cant grow facial hair
>>75204076
you're canadian
>>75204114
OH MY FRIGGING GORD MAN JUST EMBRACE THE CLEAN SHAVEN LOOK YOU ARE LITERALLY 6'3" IF YOU JUST WORKED OUT YOU WOULD BE LIKE A 7.5 TO WOMEN AT THE LEAST I AM A MANLET AND WOULD SRSLY CONSIDER BALDNESS IF I COULD GAIN A FOOT EVEN THO I AM SORT OF PROUD OF BEING SHORT
actually never mind i would never take that deal but still
>>75204140
i wouldnt grow a bread if i could it just makes me inferior
>>75204140
Im bald at 6 2 its not that bad, thank fully i have a nice head shape and dont look like mr potato head
>>75204175
Btw Lost it at 19 first month of uni was a bummer
>>75204168
just be proud of what you got. a white man in america who is not a manlet and not poor (???) what more can one man want
>>75204175
honestly you're so tall most people can't see the shine on the top of your head
>>75204192
a gf
>>75204192
being able to grow facial
>>75204192
Bitch part is started balding at the crown i still have a perfect hairline reee
>>75204216
i can help you with your facial ;)
the gf
im always sad, i keep constantly thinking about sad things that have happened to me and depressing thoughts. But i manage somehow, maybe some day things will look up and ill be better
im actually not white
I always feel a little better about myself when I read a news story about a normie commiting suicide
>>75204234
this is an innuendo
>>75204244
i believe it
holy fuck /cum/. stop being /r9k/.
kaitlin
>>75204212
that is something to be earned, not given at birth
*COUGH* OBTAIN NUMBERS *COUGH*
>>75204216
just reverse psych yourself and look at nu males with facial hair till you hate it
>>75204227
just go full johnny sins
>>75202122
sit next to her, carefully take her sneakers off, and then put her socked foot on my nose and sniff the shit out of it
>>75204216
just look at glorious men with beautiful beards you will never ever have
>>75204272
Does this make sense though?
going to pray to elliot rodger for facial hair
Thoughts on this? >>>/r9k/37218670
god spare me
Do you guys ever talk to girls on the bus?
Watch out /cum/, I'm a crazy psycho bitch
We're all gonna make it buds, it's gonna be OK
>>75204282
jesus christo just smother your face in rogaine foam and see what happens
>>75204281
which part confuses you
>>75204297
I don't talk to anyone ever.
>>75204297
>Do you guys ever talk
not really no
>>75204259
You're right I should just be myself
>>75204297
I would but honestly it feels like a lot of women don't want to be bothered. then they give you a cold metaphorical shield and you just feel like a shitty creep. if a women is really responsive to me tho that's definitely a gem
seen a lot of this
>>75204310
The sniffing socks part.
>>75204297
A girl talked to me on a bus once
We were former classmates though
Also I was high as shit and she quickly noticed
Don't think I spaghetti'd too hard though, luckily
>>75204362
lol who gets high on the bus...
>>75204369
the homeless
>>75204357
sock sniffing is an important part leading up to toe sucking
you put them up to your nose and breathe deep
I don't know I do that with ass too but maybe I'm just too freaky
>>75204369
I was still in high school at the time, I smoked with some friends after school then took the city bus home because I didn't have a car
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D3dR7u7TPNo
>>75204398
too beta imo. when I was more socially outgoing I would just take off womens shoes and just start wearing them around and have them follow me asking for their shoes back or whatever. that's ALPHA
>>75204431
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yHNfvJc99YY
I think we need to be more open minded to the Islamic culture, and stop this bigotry once and for all. Being Islamophobic should be illegal. If you're close minded and not able to open up to the world, you should not be in public. This is the only way we can progress, and if you try to oppose this, you will be punished. Comprende?
>tfw racist britbongs voted for brecksit
>isis will never get a chance to get rid of the monarchy
All this fucked up shit I'm doing needs to stop.
I like this picture.
askaskaskskksaks
only pedofiles like anime
edit: Thank you for the gold stranger!
>>75204447
Femdom foot fetishism is stupid as fuck. I just like the way a pair of Superstars smells after a long, hot day.
>>75204491
only anime girls can look good with green hair
>>75204481
at least someone in the world cares about their own culture
>*talks in my green voice*
I listend to this song when I walk to the store
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lkYVo0wgLq4