/brit/

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no

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mara

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>oi boss *kmt* 'llow man ponce a blem, yeah?

gay cunts

>>71693663
yanks welcome

I stand with Yanks (ISWY)

>>71693697
hello nigger

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the bogan goal

I've got a terrible pain my ankle lads, it's been there for a few years now and it's aggravated by any sort of movement or stretching which has become a problem. When I'm about to cum the muscles in my feet and legs almost involuntarily extend with both my feet being pushed violently down; the issue is that on more than one occasion, in the seconds immediately preceding climax, I've just absentmindedly rushed down to grab my foot that is now throbbing with pain. During one such unfortunate event I event reached a quick burst of semen right on my nose

biltong

I feel tired but I can't sleep

Wtf is going on lads?

>>71693725
nice babby shoulders lmao

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8F8HwVcqH8g
need to bring this back 2bh

>>71693715
>>71693684
pls reed op lol thx k by

why are people complaining about suicide squad getting an oscar for make up when the make up was actually good?

why are there so few white sith afrikaans online

>>71693715
>aiy wus laiyk *kmt* born in dis khuntri n ting

Derby here, It's raining here too

>>71693769
Tony Blair? More like Tony bloody Nightmare am I right!

#satire

>>71693747
my mate got cancer from biltong

>>71693779

unemployed after the empire collapsed

>>71693779
busy killing blacks

Oooocean man, the crust of a tan man imbibed by the sand, soaking up the thirst of the land
why does it have to be some dumb meme, this song is great

>>71693859
jamal

Took all day to get the puppy to have water. Bought a baby bottle and he finally started drinking

just watched some skinny black lad squirt water at a rat

>>71693779
anglo boi pussies are being bummed and boeren are obviously working like honest men do

>>71693897
pics

>>71693788
Ilson here, it's spitting but not too bad

>>71693959
d'oh! xd we've been had!

just started pissing it down here in Peterborough

>>71693959
one of the best gimmicks in all of /brit/, after of course my many contributions

>>71693897
Did you rape it haha

imagine actually being australian or american

mental

>>71693897
Remember to teach the doggo to kill while its still young or it will turn into a pussy like you.

>>71694006
He's white m8

>>71694037
do we have a lot of proxy fags today or have we really got someone in ethiopia and papau new guinea

>>71693939
are there any popular dutch/afrikaans forums etc.

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the goal
>>71694068
at least PNGlad is real

>>71694090
ultra deano

I could hack literally anything; if I so chose to.

>>71693832
highly underrated post imo (in my opinion)

>>71694090
Uni deano

>>71693959
would get involved with this gimmick but dont want to get banned every few hours

>>71694138
my bollocks please x

I'm all up for a bit of banter but sexism has no place in today's society.

>>71694178
bent twat

450mg of ketamine up the shit shoot

guy makes orgasm noise at me as I walk past. Me: "that will probably be the only time you ever hear that noise in your life"

why do gays make their sexuality the focal point of their lives? nobody else does this

*rolls up in my jag*
Alri

Someone bleeped at me from a car as I was striding down the road. I yelled "I AM A WOMAN NOT A TRAFFIC JAM".

>>71694241
FOY

Man: "Nice tits." Me: "If you're going to be a sexist pig at least be accurate. I have fantastic breasts." Silence....

>>71694255
alri deanooooooooooooooooo

you can stop now

Managed to stop white van full of men mid-catcall by shoving a big powdery donut into my mouth then smiling with mouth full

>>71694275
Men shouldn't have boobies. Go on a diet pls.

wanty dae a cry

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>>71694270
oh i see so you're in a proverbial turf war with straight people and that's why you've been shitting up these threads for the past two weeks

Bloke: 'you're a bit too thin for me'. Me: 'that's lucky because you're a bit too thick for me'.

I cannae breathe

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Post yfw Cheryl Cole will be remembered more for being an X Factor judge or having a string of celebrity boyfriends than this absolute tune:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V9Wv4SCBiTE

>>71694353
>cole
who?

MAN: "Ive got the F, C and K, all I need is U" ME: "I've got the B, Y and E, so I don't need U"

>>71694353
>Implying Heaven isn't Chezza's GOAT tune

FUCK.
OFF.

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>>71694353
could you imagine finding the perfect girl for you but then find out she's done this to her body

Him: "Look darlin, I don't mean to hassle you but…" Me: "WELL THEN DON'T HASSLE ME."
...Then he got aggressive

poo a'brewin.tbqh ngl la

>>71694405
FOY

Guy on train after I asked him to move his bag off seat: "Why don't you grab my cock?" Me: "I didn't bring any tweezers."

>>71694418
make me

Male colleague: "Don't mind her, she's on her period." Me: "If I had to bleed to find you annoying, I'd be anaemic."

can always spot the newcunt when they use the foy gimmick incorrectly

>>71694459
foy

>>71694391
didn't she get turned down for the US xfaxtor because yanks couldn't understand her

flashed at on a bus when I was 19. Snorted and said I'd seen more meat on a butcher's apron. Flasher got off bus head low

my mum keeps trying to set me up with one of her younger friends who has a 4 year kid.

>>71694138
Hack the planet

>>71694478
i remember a lad on /brit/ revealed that he has a criminal record because he mooned some rozzers out of a bus window

A man once pointed out loudly that I have huge boobs. I looked down at them and screamed like I'd never noticed them before

>>71694481
just do it la try the normie life

>>71694508
*and report back

>>71694275
How is having nice tits sexist?
Are you saying men cant have beautiful breasts?

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>i remember a lad on /brit/ revealed that he has a criminal record because he mooned some rozzers out of a bus window

men are getting absolutely slated by these brave, strong women ITT
This is the final result of feminism

venus in cancer

>>71694353
Fuck Nadine Coyle was hot in that video. Wasn't she like 17 though?

incorrect use of jayposting

>>71694537
pretty sure jay would be the one claiming to have mooned rozzers. learn how to gimmick correctly, arsehead.

>>71694544
feminism only exists because women are inferior

>>71694391
Nadine > Kimberley > Sarah > Cheryl >>>>>> the ginger scouse one

*surreptitiously opens the video*

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>pretty sure jay would be the one claiming to have mooned rozzers. learn how to gimmick correctly, arsehead.

>>71694544
man hating
yeah, we know

sometimes I wish life was an arena shooter like quake where I could just double jump out of tricky situations

>>71694620
accurate i rate it

>>71694620
>Liking The Inbetweeners

>>>LADbible

>>71694648
That would get pretty tiresome after some time.

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>accurate i rate it

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http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-us-canada-39108194

>US President Donald Trump is seeking to boost defence spending by $54bn (£43bn) in his proposed budget plan for 2018, which is about a 9% increase.

>The blueprint, sent to agencies on Monday, also calls for cuts to foreign assistance and environmental budgets.

>But Mr Trump's plan leaves large welfare programmes such as Social Security and Medicare untouched, despite Republican calls for reform.

interesting

>>71694691
kinda accurate, i sort of rate it

>>71694681
you reckon?

>>71694230
>>71694257
>>71694275
>>71694307
>>71694336
>>71694369
>>71694396
>>71694425
>>71694454
>>71694478
>>71694506
*Forces your head*

why is everyone in ireland a manlet?

Bought a new pair of Wranglers today lads
They're very comfy

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>>71694353
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rvpw4rJ-oJE

I honestly used to be obsessed with her and thought she was the most beautiful woman in the world when I was younger

>>71694719
Not him but thanks

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>>71694726
fucking (You) bonanza, I'm going into a hypo here

anyone here gone off the radar before? How'd it go?

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need a feminist gf

>Car insurance 'set to soar' after ruling

brilliant cheers

>>71694787
put my hood up on the way to greggs once

pizza for dinner last night. had the leftovers for breakfast and lunch today. still got a couple of slices left.

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>pizza for dinner last night. had the leftovers for breakfast and lunch today. still got a couple of slices left.

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>>71694771
Genuinely thought she looked better during the early Girls Aloud days when she was a geordie charva.

suicide mondays lads

this is the price i pay for mdma

>>71694819
shame. i guess i'll just have to use public transport instead. the government clearly dont like us driving so they have invested lots of time and money into making public transport in this country state of the art.

oh wait

>>71694815
Cuck

>>71694861
Postie her roastie

>>71694876
i did mdma over the weekend too. as well as 2C-B, ketamine, acid and whatever my mate kept putting up my nose. probably poppers or something the gay bastard.

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>suicide mondays lads

>this is the price i pay for mdma

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OH, it's brutal

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your opinion on these?

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>i did mdma over the weekend too. as well as 2C-B, ketamine, acid and whatever my mate kept putting up my nose. probably poppers or something the gay bastard.

>>71694876
for me it lasts like 4 or 5 days
have some vitamins, surprisingly there's actually some decent info over on the 'dit

>trying to milk a one-thread gag
shameful

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>there's actually some decent info over on the 'dit

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>>71694866
under every manky chav there's a beautiful woman

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>>71694947
Wish the twats didn't discontinue the honey-roasted cashews

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>under every manky chav there's a beautiful woman

>>71694990
>"over on the 'dit"
proxyank

>>71695035
How can't you tell he's quoting a post? It's literally 2 posts higher.

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Why do breeders need to make everything about their sexuality.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WpYeekQkAdc

great song with a powerful message <3

https://youtu.be/p4SFs7f6gLs

just got an offer from chester uni

i'd be finishing my course at age 26, not sure if i'm gonna accept

>>71695074
*whips out fedora* of course I can tell, the point is there's self-awareness in that phrase which makes hatposting with it unnecessary

>>71694876
>mondays

isn't it tuesdays
i usually don't feel it until midweek

>>71695127
insecure loser. no one cares how old you are, arrogant wanker.

Missed train and got the brunt of the rain on the way back
Hour wasted, day wasted desu

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>>71695127
do you think 26 is old or summat

like your life is already over by then

Ahh yes, Norwegians

http://i.4cdn.org/wsg/1488041103569.webm

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oEp7NDzsLFw

choooooon

>>71695292
wow what a truly shite song

>Need to sort something out at uni
>Email the two people I think could sort it out
>get two replies
>First one says i need to sort it out with the second one
>Second one says i need to sort it out with the first one

hmmm, real head scratcher

I am SO SOOOOO tempted to get this laptop but I just don't have the funds for it right this minute

http://amzn.eu/aLTmZwI

Should I take out a payday loan?

>Nobody knew healthcare could be so complicated

wew

>>71695325
shut the fuck up you raging deano

>>71695222
alright lad don't get your knickers in a twist

>>71695267
nah but it'd be a bit weird trying to get entry level positions at 26-27

I am a mess, a miserable mess

>>71695337
how about you be patient and learn to live within your means you dumb capitalist twat

>>71695127
Why did you apply then mongo

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Accidentally deleted all my pepes

went to the physio
he put some tape on my shoulders

>>71695377
i'm a cheeky lad who lives for the thrill of pointless ucas applications

>>71695387
Could do with that for my weird shoulder hair tbqhwyl

why the FUCK is there not a fascist party in power RIGHT NOW

>going to uni

just start your own business lmao

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>>71694947
>Sweet chili
Oh gawd yes~

>>71695332
What a classic situation :DDD

Starting to dislike you lot

>>71694947
absolute fucking belter
BUT
hate the residue that builds up on my fingers as i eat them

>>71695445
use chopsticks

>>71694947
rank 2bh

salted or dry roasted desu

>>71695354
>it'd be a bit weird trying to get entry level positions at 26-27
not really
so many positions require x ammount of experience now that people of all ages are applying for entry positions. Whats the course?

>>71695484
sports journalism

feeling a dis one

https://youtu.be/JNN4Tc9va_c

you'll never get rich working for someone

sweet chilli flavour is the ultimate runt-flavour

why does /brit/ have such shite taste in music

>>71695484
software engineering

>>71695498 imposter

sweet Thai curry

http://www.thedailymash.co.uk/news/society/man-claims-hius-life-being-ruined-by-immigration-but-cant-explain-how-20170227122932

lol!

>>71695525
i'd fucking floor you in one punch but im too busy eating my sweet chilli chicken

http://i.4cdn.org/wsg/1488181965436.webm

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gf just sent me this

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>you'll never get rich working for someone

stargate sg-1 s01e01 has full frontal nudity. nice. hairy bush too.

>Saturday
>Bring girl back to room
>Can't get it up
>She sticks about for an hour or so trying to help then leaves

Literally never been so pissed off at myself in my life. Looks like I'm dying a virgin after all.

>>71695527
what do you listen to

My life is falling apart lads
I haven't been to work in three days, I can't fucking sleep at all, they're going to fire me, and I'm going to be homeless

What do?

>>71695515
What about sports players

>>71695531
oh no worries then, programmers obviously don't care about experience and would much rather see that you spent 3 years and £30,000 on a piece of paper

>>71695544
hot

>>71695531
just do it lad. Software engineering is a RELATIVELY new field so you get a lot of people who trained in other fields switching over, it's probably got one of the highest rates of mature students.

>>71695579
vote green

>>71695515
don't want to be rich, just comfy

running a business yourself seems stressful and soemthing you can never take a break from

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>a pint of wine

>>71695562
You can do it lad, I did that the first time I brought a girl back, just lost my virginity three weeks ago, just keep trying

>>71695562
>>Bring girl back to room
how did this happen? legitimately, i'm confused about how to do this.
I've only ever had sex with one girl. We were at a party and she started kissing me and then we were together for two years. I dont know how people have sex normally.

>>71695544
my dad looks a bit like obama. if obama was white that is.

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Bunch of bloody whiners on here desu

>>71695562
this is why everyone should have some cheeky viagra lying around

What helps on a comedown lads?

Already had plenty of vitamin C. Other than that I'm just trying to distract myself from the emptiness and self-loathing.

posted a shirtless selfie on my snapchat
what am i like

>>71695579
Why haven't you been to work you numpty?

>>71695649
weed and benzos

>>71695649
have a chat with your gf

>>71695642
howling at people who are "proud" of being literal wagecucks

>22 and hairline is already receding
Death's sweet embrace can't come quick enough.

>>71695658
Tried to kiss a married woman, needless to say she reported me.

>>71695658
I can't fucking sleep
I've got maybe 4 hours sleep in the past 3 days, I can't do anything properly

>>71695586
lad how am i supposed to get experience in it if every entry software engineering job requires some kind of apprenticeship qualification or degree

>>71695689
at least you're not short as well

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Buzz Lightyear to star command! I have successfully landed on the alien planet of /brit/! No sign of intelligent life in sight!

>>71695700
thought you just drunk texted her. fucking liar.

>>71695711
you were supposed to get a job straight after college and learn while you were, you know, actually programming

>>71695625
Will do. Feel bad though, the girl from Saturday's really nice but she was quite offended I think.
>>71695627
It's the first time in my life I'd ever noticed cues in body language 2bh. She was playing with her hair and putting her legs up to mine. Eventually I just suggested heading back up to the room.
>>71695644
Speed, alcohol and beta-blockers probably ruined any change of viagra working 2bh

>>71695724
How did you know?

>>71695649
MDMA comedown?

just have 5htp before bed for the week after you do it

There's some girls at work I'd love to fuck 30 minutes after they died

>>71695753
>Eventually I just suggested heading back up to the room.
what, just said "do you want to go to my room?" or something?
fuck i've missed so many opportunities

>>71695757
lol i know you post on here, you use /brit/ memes in your everyday speak

>>71695649
fruits

How Can The News Be Real When Our Eyes Aren't Real

>>71695753
Just text her and apologize
Worst case scenario is that she is still offended
>>71695792
That is how sex works, yes

>>71695824
autist here, I didn't know people said that either

>>71695752
i have been applying since i came out of college at 18 and been working min wage in the mean time, when i came out i was applying for every job going, most employers wanted 16 year olds that they could legally pay £100 a week

spent £102 tipping camgirls today

someone kill me

Oh look the nigger film won the Oscars what a coincidence eh

>>71695858
I used to be autistic as well, but its literally just watching for body language and having a bit of timing, you fuck it up a few times first and then you get it down pat

>>71695730
Benis :D:DDD:D

*kills 74*

la la land and moonlight are both shite anyway lol who cares

>>71695919
seen all of them including the sequels they were alright desu

>>71695874
why do you do it

love a good dance me

>>71695337
how is amazon vs your national stores for price

>>71695919

Hollywood is cancerous as are all award shows

Who /drinkingtocopewithdespair/ here?

>>71695563
ed sheeran, little mix,

>>71695824
FUCKS SAKE
couple weeks ago i was drinking with a girl who kept playing with her hair, literally saying "oooooh you're bad" etc
desperately wanted to fuck her but didn't know how to move it towards that
im so FUCKING retarded

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>>71695874
Why not tip a real lady and actually have sex?

>>71695919
haha yeah everything is stupid

>>71695933
moonlight is another film about bent people and la la land is another tribute to the world of hollywood and "classic" american cinema
nothing of value at all

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pretty confident in most areas of life except women (in a romantic context). shit at initiating conversation, physically incapable of making moves on them, terrified of rejection and always overanalyse situations.

and im just getting older so the chances of getting myself a good-hearted qt are getting slimmer every day. my only options are soon going to be dried up slags, single mothers and horrible cunts.

im literally going to be alone for the rest of my life and die miserable.

>>71695953
Meet up with her again

>>71695949
awful tactic, never ever works for me

>NBN Planned availability: Jan 2018*.
reeeeee they said before this april a few months ago
lying cunts

So the Oscar bait won an Oscar

>>71695986
lmao

Was on a pretty shit comedown on the train and suddenly started sweating like hell and shivering. Must have looked like a terrorist.

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>arsepooshitehamvilleton

>>71695986
just don't think about the shit you do and man up lmao

>>71695990
nah can't even remember her name
it was at a party

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>no booze in the house
>bottleshops are all shut
>six hours til opening time

>sack Ranieri
>give Craig Shakespeare the job

literally WHAT

>>71696062
>just don't think about the shit you do

Wish I could do this 2bh

>>71696063
Ask who you went to the party with about her
Don't be a pussy

>>71695986
mate you literally just described me

>>71696062
nah. something wrong with my brain. just going to kill myself i reckon. wont have to suffer all the years of pain that way.

>>71696067
when i was an alcoholic i'd always work out like a madman before i could get drunk again

wew

http://i.4cdn.org/gif/1488205524898.webm

>>71696134

Fug :(

fucking hell

you lot are a bunch of proper 10/10 sperglords

>>71696043
>El Pooreshitdenté de los Poonited Sharts of Arsemericack, Toilet Bog Fart

>>71696084
>>71696099
lads you're going to be dead soon just don't be afraid of shit like that, dive into it

>>71695986
Same lad. Except I'm so bad that when a girl actively made all of the moves for me, I rejected her out of fear.

a BENT black bloke?? wow what a social commentary

>>71696153
>you're going to be dead soon

hope so

>>71696009
Hidden Figures and Fences was closer to oscar bait

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>suicidal ideation

>>71696174
be the man you want to be

>>71696166

>When its real nigga hours but Brokeback mountain just won't do

>nearing 22 and my cum has only just started taking on a full white colour

>>71696165
I don't reject them or invite them, I just don't do anything because I don't know what to do in that situation haha.

shan't be taking life lessons from potatonigger runts

>>71696177

Refuse to watch hidden figures 2bh

Gooch is fucking reeking lads

Already showered today but reckon I'll have t have another

>>71696091
wouldn't that be a bit weird?
"hey remember that party a couple weeks ago, who was that girl who i was talking to?"
feels like the moment has passed. I guess I will just do better next time

>>71696109
cats can actually survive falls of that height because their terminal velocity is so low, and they have a chance in the air to right themselves and spread their limbs (as that one did). If the fall had been about half as high the cat probably would have landed on its side/back and died

just got my first erection since the whole thing on Saturday

The most annoying thing is that I hadn't wanked in a week before it

Really do think Casey Affleck did well though

>>71696206
u have a bf?

>>71696177
Fences actually sounds good
does this mean its worth a watch? no

>>71696313
might have low testosterone lad, go get it checked

got absolutely ripped by the stacey gf earlier lads

http://i.4cdn.org/gif/1488057178215.webm

>>71696280
Its about the way you go about it
If you phone your friend and ask them what her name was because you want to hunt her down and wear her vulva as a hat it will be taken poorly, if you say you thought she was cool and wouldn't mind hanging out with her it might work

>>71696320
I'm hetero, m8

>>71696285
.... Sticker ...

the gf farts in her sleep lads it's disgusting

>>71696009
Same as every other year

>>71696406
braaap

>>71696406
does she shit the bed

>>71696285

Like to believe he is a highly underrated art piece x

>>71696376
ah k must've been some other flag

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7KQZ102OoJ4

VERY cute video

>>71696406
did you sniff it?
i know you did

>>71696455
He is to me. He gives me hope. If he can be happy and live, I could have a shot. x

>>71696406
do ou find vaginal mucus and period blood on her sheets and pjs?

>playing rising storm 2 beta
>it ain't me starts playing on every game

>>71696109
How did it not break its legs?

bought some sniff online but because its good shit its a bit wet and sticky. how to dry it?

>>71696508
pmsl that's not very PC is it?! lol

>>71696554
gross

>>71696514
RARE

>>71696514
Need a gf like this to manhandle me.

>>71696567
>gross
literally fuck off you yank twat

>>71696554
YEa

>>71696591
fuck off paddy this is /brit/

>>71696514
half circle forward, half circle forward + kick

>>71696639
then why are you here you yank spastic

John Oliver needs to come back to the UK and lead the Radical centrist revolution that will dethrone corbyn

Keylogger inside the redditflags extension is giving terrific results

File: britcore.png (1MB, 2677x2296px) Image search: [Google]

1MB, 2677x2296px

reminder

>>71696664
go join the lid dems red tory blairite

>>71696664
john oliver does a huge disservice to the image of britain overseas
I hate him so much

>>71696697
shit taste

>>71696728

>>71696702
I'm so centre I'm even between the lib dems

>>71696709
Did you not see his '2016' episode? It was absolute comedy gold, I felt euphoric


These captchas are getting so stupid

>>71696259
your uncle didn't either and looked what happened to him