Ask a PHP programmer anything

>>58460086
how do i kill myself with household items?

no bleach or hanging, though

>>58460107
Slit your own throat

>>58460086
How do you like your coffee?

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>>58460086
stop supporting php

>>58460107

Jump off a cliff

>>58460086
why can't you learn a decent language? are you that stupid?

ps: did you ride to school on a short bus?

pps: that girl is fugly,

When are you going to learn a real language?

>>58460156

I didn't choose PHP.

PHP chose me.

I wish I could do anything but PHP, but it's matter of money.

>>58460142

60% coffe 40% milk

What makes you think using php is considered programming, are you literally retarded?

>>58460086
What do you think this outputs?

<?php 
echo false[0];

>>58460107
bag over head

is it ok to still use php 5.4 ?

or am I forced to update ?

Also do you know any good portable xammp alternatives? At long as it has sql support as well

>>58460157
i don't have a cliff in my house

>>58460131
should have added 'painless'. even more so, that would make a mess.

>inb4 exit bag

>>58460251
why would any sane person run outdated php versions.. they are full of unpatched exploits

>>58460251

7.0 is 25% faster upgrade at all cost.

Why would you get rid of the almighty xampp? It is by far the best.

Your alternative is to install apache and sql...

>>58460216

false is reserved and thus it will return an error

>>58460179
40%? I could understand if it was a latte and it was foamed, but 40% milk in a regular coffee, not foamed milk and not even espresso?

And you use PHP...

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>>58460415

>Likes foamed milk
>Criticizes other people

>>>/out/

>>58460347
wrong.

>>58460469

On 5:

>FATAL ERROR syntax error, unexpected '[', expecting ',' or ';' on line number 2

On 7:

>>58460156
That guy is a hero.
I don't understand why people like programming either. It's just means to an end. Necessary evil.

>>58460494
https://3v4l.org/X972s

>>58460156
>"Ugly problems often require ugly solutions."
Makes you think.

>>58460179
>60% coffe 40% milk
Kill yourself, faggot.

Also how long are you doing this? How much do you make these days?

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>>58460576

I am making 40 k €uros/year

Have been doing this for 3 years.

>>58460086
do you have a job, and did you need a degree for it?

t. soon to be a college drop out

>>58460734

Of course I have a job it is the only way I would ever touch PHP.

I am actually a college dropout too and I regret it immensely. I will go to college again on September but I am 25 years old now. Think twice before dropping.

>>58460632
Lol 40k a year
P a t h e t i c

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>>58460785

it is a decent payment here

>Be american
>Elect a meme as president
>Get shot

>>58460781
im 26 and cba dragging my shitty math degree any further

>>58460819

Should I ask when did you begin?

>>58460107
Become alcoholic, within 10 years the problem will resolve itself. meanwhile you get to be 24/7 drunk.

>>58460884
when i was 22. i won't be able to finish this degree in 2 years because i still didnt pass calculus 3. i told my story before here in /g/ and people recommended me to learn webdev and try to find a job.

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>>58460975

>Listening to advice from the internet
>Listening to advice from 4chan
>ever

>>58460785
I make $69k/year. I would happily give that up for €40k/year. America is burning to the fucking ground; I don't want to stay in Christian Iran any longer than I have to.

>>58460086
what is PHP?

>>58460107
roll a frisbee and shove it down your throat

>>58460283

Latest release of 5.6 fixes most exploits. There is so much php software out there for running simple dynamic websites that I'd consider it safe enough for most usage.

If you're writing a new site, it's best to avoid PHP altogether, but lots of shops have 10s of thousands of man hours making PHP libraries and classes that do a lot of heavy lifting without much problem. If it ain't broke...