The new iphone update is SUCH ABSOLUTE TRASH. Ive never been

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The new iphone update is SUCH ABSOLUTE TRASH. Ive never been to this board but came here because i need to discuss this ABORTION of an update.

So there i am and my phone has been giving me "OH I NEED TO UPDATE PLEASE UPDATE" message for a few days now, and of fucking course i dont want an update. Why would i? Every single update has changed NOTHING. Its pointless. But on the other hand, the none stop notifications telling me WE WILL UPDATE AT 2AM (even though that never happens EVER) are getting annoying i decide fuck it, lets get it over with.

After near 10 minute of the staring at that pretentious stupid iphone logo my new updated OS pops up AND LOW AND BEHOLD ITS UTTER DOGSHIT.

1) HAVE TO PRESS BUTTON TO GET LOCKSCREEN. Why?!?!? WHATS THE POINT?? Its been the same for years and not a single person said oh wow i sure wish i could PUSH A BUTTON TO GET A LOCK SCREEN. Now every time i swipe to get a lockscreen, but instead see that fucking useless calendar, i Feel nothing but white hot pant shitting rage

2) APPLE, IN ALL THEIR BRILLIANCE, FUCKED UP MUSIC TOO. Now you have to pull up the little window at the bottlm, SCROLL TO THE SIDE to get a DIFFERENT menu, and T H E N PRESS PLAY. Why the extra step!??! WHY ARE YOU MAKING THINGS MORE COMPLICATED???

3) everything is grey. Why. I get that it compliments white, but why is it "kinda see through" grey. THATS UGLY YOU TONE DEAF SHIT STICKS

STEVE JOBS PROBABLY OFFED HIMSELF TO AVOID THIS TRASH UPDATE. WHAT IS THIS AN WHY. I would rather have my balls STAPLED TO MY LEG then to even LOOK AT MY PHONE ANYMORE.
I WOULD RATHER PUT NAIR DOWN MY URETHRA THEN EVEN PLAY A SIMPLE SONG, ONE OF THE FEW JOYS IN MY BLACK AND VACANT LIFE

THIS PHONE WAS A GIFT, BUT IVE COME TO ABSOLUTELY HATE IT. I HOPE EVERY SAMSUNG PHONE OWNER tHROW THEIR PHONE AT YOUR BUILDING AND THEY ALL EXPLODE SIMULTANIOUSLY DESTROYING ALL OF YOUR TECHNOLOGY AND EvERY SINGLE EMPLOYEE YOU HAVE BURNS ALIVE. FUCK. YOU.

REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE