Thread replies: 97
Thread images: 6
Thread images: 6
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>>38192363
You can get all the good parts without completely giving up social contact.
It's mainly an excuse for people with social anxiety.
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feels like an excuse to just be hyperfocused on one thing in your life to feel like you're making progress, while ignoring the actual difficult things and remaining NEET .
unless you're a professional athlete, /fit/ness should be an accessory in your life, not the focus.
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The results aren't worth the social losses.
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I've been in self induced cocoon mode since 2004.
Dropped out of highschool to play MMORPGS and Lift.
I have the AAA. Aesthetic, Autistic, Agoraphobic.
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>>38192422
>>38192441
>>38192363
>>38192425
tbf I feel like coffin mode is for the ugly lads who don't get any social interaction.
What would you recommend for somebody who literally doesn't have any friends and is completly socially retarded/inexperienced-naive??
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>>38192481
>What would you recommend for somebody who literally doesn't have any friends and is completly socially retarded/inexperienced-naive??
Going outside to talk to people?
like wtf, it's like asking what would you recommend to someone who's weak and wants to get strong.
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>>38192496
Like who? The cashiers? There only so much you can say. You can't stop people right off the street and make conversation with them anyway.
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>>38192481
Contrary to what a lot of people here will tell you, social gains are more important. I'd tell you how to make friends if I knew (tfw) but fitness should come second. Do you want to look back and realize you were pretty swole or do you want to look back at all the relationships and good times with the lads? (PS you can do both)
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>>38192554
>Like who?
Join a club
Start talking to people where you normally go, like at the gym or whatever.
Sign up on meetup.com to do something that interests you and meet people there
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I'm currently in cocoon mode but not by choice, i lost my job 3 months ago, its horrible but im in the best shape of my life.
I no longer have money to order food, take away food or buy fast food, i am now obligated to cook my own food, go to the local market trying to find fresh stuff with also saving money, picking meat deals from store to store, i dont even drink protein shakes anymore(can't afford them), i just watch my macros and try to get my protein intakes from oats(they are really cheap and high protein, its some puerto rican brand lol), powder skim milk, fruits.
Im now focused in my new job and my studies, but it really fucking sucks not having any money at all to go out, but in the plus side im not drinking so often(gain killers), stopped smoking, i went out 4 weeks algo, like a for a week, drinking from bar to bar, and it was good, i hooked up with 3 girls, at the end i tried it with one girl, but i swear to god i stopped seeing her because i dont feel like spending money/time with here, i feel is not worth it, but i feel so bad because i dont have money to go out. i feel like im the best shape of my life and cant even show it off lol, im starting in my new job but is a training stage so i dont have to go everyday and when i do its like half a day, i only go to the gym because i paid a full year membership, its already paid, i only go to the gym, eat, sleep, play some computer games, and smoke weed because my flatmate always buys for himself, watch movies, seems fun i know but i barely meet women, i dont have many friends so its sucks.
I dont even have money to buy new clothes, the good thing its that my old clothes actually fit very good right now.
Sorry about the rant, im high right now, but the thing is, cocoon mode sucks because you feel like you will show off to the world, but you have to wait, youre not ready yet, what happens if you never feel ready? you always find one flaw that you have to correct first,
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>>38192496
this bro, i know how you probably feel, the dude you replied to is who im refering to. you might be scared of rejection in the back of ur mind in a deeper way. But this about it this and im so glad i learned it early, if you dont take the shot at all you regret it way more than not trying. Even if things didnt work ou the way i hoped it made me so much more confident, having a bad experience or whatever is a lot better than not knowing what could of be.
I know you probably wont know what im talking about or even care at all, i had to give my input tho
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people really dont get how hard it is to make friends after you are like 25+
its hard as fuck, harder than any lift
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>>38192363
you will go crazy without social interaction
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>>38192363
Everything but the sticky is bullshit here, son.
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>>38192481
Work a job with forced meaningless interactions. Grocery, retail, restaurant. You'll talk to hundreds of people a day- after a few months of that do you really think you'll be the same level of autism?
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Benn in semi-cocoon mode for about a year. Still get laid and hang out with friends. But, been killing it in the gym and the kitchen. I've always been a reader, so smarter than the average pleb and smart enough to know just how dumb I truly am. I can understand the great concepts, but create them? Those moments are few and far between...
Anyway, between meditating, lifting, eating right, I've never felt fucking better. Went from 220 to a svelt 190. Got a nice 4 pack for the first time ever, lower two abs covered by loose skin :( Sad Chad (my name really is Chad)
So, yeah, cocoon mode. Do it.
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>>38192622
Yeah people are too fucking scared of shit these days man
People think of all these ridiculous scenarios in their head, and even if that shit WERE to happen, it still wouldn't be that bad.
Like saying something really embarrassing to a girl, in ur head you probably think "What if she laughs in my face, then everyone hears and laughs too then they start taking pictures of me and posting them online and laughing calling me a creep" but nothing fking happens, even if you act like a retard or fail nothing bad will happen, you'll probably have a funny story to tell your friends later "Hey guys i said _____ to some girl, hahah it was crazy"
Just dust yourself off and go at it. Nothing wrong with failure, if you gave it your best shot at whatever is there's nothing to regret or feel bad about. If you lived your life to the max every day and then the next day you got hit by a car and died there's nothing wrong
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>>38192616
but its flaw after flawt and after flaw, it never ends, then time passes you by, and youre still in cocoon mode, there is always something missing, "maybe people will like me if i have this or that first", "i have to be like this first before everything", "they will see..." "just wait until you see me"... its never enough, eventually you die in your cocoon, full of wasted potential, dont waste your life into cocoon mode, is not worth it and you will feel bad because it never ends, nothing is enough.
Just evolve with your transformation, embrace your figure, try always to be better but not in a shell, share your experience with someone, cocoon mode is selfish because you dont share yourself with people, maybe someone can see youre making progress and he or she will be inspired/impressed by you and your evolution as a person and as a whole.
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cant meet people cause doing stuff solo is impossible
cant go to social places cause you are a loser if you are by yourself
its like entry level jobs that want 5 years experience. cant get the job if you dont have experience, cant get experience if you dont have a job.
it sucks, but what can you do.
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>>38192682
>cant go to social places cause you are a loser if you are by yourself
No you aren't, wtf lmfao nice confidence bro
>its like entry level jobs that want 5 years experience
They don't you fucking excuse maker, there's jobs everywhere you just have to apply for them.
>cant get the job if you dont have experience
Lie on your resume and make experience up, they never check. Fucking pussies from /r9k/ making excuses man, fuck off from /fit/ this board isn't for you. Maybe try /r9k/ or /pol/
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>>38192363
Cocoon mode is just justified procrastination. Don't fall for it.
Cocoon is like studying to be a mechanic or doctor and never actually going out and doing the thing with your bare hands.
Would you trust a guy FRESH out of school to fix your car?
Would you trust a doctor to operate on you if he never had blood on his hands?
No you would not. Because despite what you believe about cocoon mode, you know you never start learning till you get your hands dirty. Cocoon was made up by 4chan autists to justify their pathetic existence of being a powerlifting NEETs with 0 social skills. You can read every pua book ever made while attaining Zyzz mode, it wont made a shred of difference. So instead of being a spaghetti-spilling dyel. You'll still be a spaghetti-spilling NEET with big muscles.
And here's the truth; Once people see past the muscles and smell your social ineptitude they will laugh at you to your face. They'll see you as just another fake fuckboy. Once people smell your crippling insecurity, your muscles might as well be an optical illusion. Instead of being seen by others an just a nerd, they'll see you as an overcompensating nerd. You look like Zyzz but you open your mouth and you're Michael Cera. Nothing inspires more contempt in our time than flimsy inauthenticity and no shining physique on this earth will save you from pic related.
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>>38192670
exactly brotha, the thing is it gets into peoples heads and its hard to shake off, but once you do your set for life, you cant complain if you have no regrets, "i shouldnt ask her out she'll say no anyway"
I remember when i had those kind of thoughts and the answer surprised me a lot of the time. If you have positive attitude in life thats all you need, i know how clique it sounds but if your positive, positive things WILL happen, everything depends on your mindset in life, a poorer person than you or just shittier life in general could still be happier because there mindset,
remember theres 7.x billion people on this planet, some realize it and a whole lot dont, all have the same awareness in a SENSE as you. You can do anything you can imagine, law of attraction.
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>>38192702
ok then, what the fuck do you do on a saturday night if you have no friends to do stuff with?
I had friends but they are all married now and dont want to do shit.
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>>38192702
this dude is right, even tho /fit is 45% r9k aswell as poll so 90% total, with 10% of people who have direction in life. You gotta start to learn to stop masking excuses or else your stuck in a rut of regret.
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>do all of those
>still be social
wew
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>>38192727
>ok then, what the fuck do you do on a saturday night if you have no friends to do stuff with?
Make friends with people at your job or gym or other mutual hobbies. Then meet more friends from those friends and so on. Once the ball gets rolling it's easy
Go to a meetup for one of your interests and meet people there, by doing things you both enjoy which means you're likely to have something in common.
Go to meetup.com and go play boardgames or poker with people or something, i dont fucking know what you like to do
>>38192724
Yep, the most important thing in life is trying and failing
Failure teaches you far more than success does
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>>38192740
I swear to fucking god man
the US is at the lowest unemployment rate in many years, volatility keeps breaking record lows, market is BOOMING, s&p at all-time high and some faggots will STILL complain about "Muh economy, muh no jobs"
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>>38192749
people at the gym just want to work out (as do I)
noone wants to stop their routine to talk to randoms. it isnt "easy", and you cant just approach random people without looking like some PUA idiot.
my point is, as you get older its very hard to make new friends. and I dont see any good ways to do so
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>>38192727
>ok then, what the fuck do you do on a saturday night if you have no friends to do stuff with?
I got you brah
https://www.games-workshop.com/en-PL//store/storefinder.jsp
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in one sentence, what is your most useful piece of advice?
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>>38192785
thin your paints
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>>38192765
>people at the gym just want to work out (as do I)
Just talk to people dude.
>Just want to work out
BULLSHIT. Everyone wants to talk, they're just nervous and shy just like you are. Take the initiative and start a conversation with someone, just do it. If they don't take the bait to start a convo then don't push it, they aren't interested. I promise you like 3/5 will reciprocate most likely.
>noone wants to stop their routine to talk to randoms
That's funny. That's really weird actually man. Because I have made numerous friends at my gym.
All I did was start talking to them, and the words just flowed and I made some new buddies. It's easy as fuck, just do it. Just try at least, if it doens't work - ok whatever it doesn't work, but give it a shot. It's worked for me and I'm sure i'm not unique or special in any way
>and you cant just approach random people without looking like some PUA idiot
Who cares what you look like?
I say CHEESY AS FUCK pickup lines from /fit/ to girls, I use self-deprecating humor, I say whatever i want whenever I want and I talk to random people when i want to.
I've yet to care what people think of me, and more importantly I've yet to have a negative interaction. Worst case scenario they don't recriprocate and I say to myself 'Okay np, they're just having a bad day, it isn't me, they just aren't in the mood'
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>>38192771
never been a fan of boardgames, just the regular variety
I used to go to clubs and stuff but I just have no social circle to do stuff with anymore. im just tired of staying home on weekends, I look for reasons to go out but then im like what am I gonna do, drink at a bar by myself? go to a club by myself? that doesnt sound very fun, does it?
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>>38192785
save your self the pain of a long and lonely miserable life and kill yourself
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>>38192819
I told you
Meetup.com
Go on there, look for shit you like to do in your area. Maybe go kayaking or something, whatever it is you like go do it and you'll meet new people
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>>38192798
>>>/tg/
They need your advice, anon. Go to them.
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>>38192828
going to a meetup thing is essentially like going to a bar solo, isnt it?
why would that be any different? id argue its worse, since its forced interaction, not natural
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>>38192863
Because the entire point of a meetup is...
c'mon, man, think this through.
...meet people.
Everyone there has the goal of meeting people and making IRL friends
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>>38192363
It would seem like the point of this cocoon mode is to attract the opposite sex
to which I say
why bother?
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>>38192863
>going to a meetup thing is essentially like going to a bar solo, isnt it?
>why would that be any different? id argue its worse, since its forced interaction, not natural
Okay i'm going to give up responding to you /r9k/ fucking autists now.
No matter what I write you're going to make some excuse, it's useless. I could write anything and you'll find an excuse rather than a solution.
>why would that be any different?
BECAUSE THERE'S A BUNCH OF STRANGERS(WHO EITHER HAVE BEEN THERE A COUPLE TIMES BEFORE, OR LIKELY BRAND-NEW) THERE TO DO AN ACTIVITY THEY ENJOY TOGETHER. Jesus christ man
How do autists like you even function?
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>>38192869
but it's forced, its not like meeting people with common interests, you're just socializing cause you signed up for some event.
theres no guarantee you will even like anyone at the meetup also
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>>38192900
>but it's forced, its not like meeting people with common interests
wat.
How is it forced? It's completely voluntary to go there
>theres no guarantee you will even like anyone at the meetup also
There's no guarantees about anything, wtf? Do you want like a guarantee that you'll make exactly 4 friends from one meetup?
if you don't like it there's no obligation, just don't show up ever again
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>>38192924
surely there has to be better ways to making friends than meetup
also, and I know the irony of this statement, but if they are my age and alone odds are they are fucked up in some way, no?
like, a girl who is 30 and single with no kids is probably messed up in some way, or fat, for example.
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>>38192363
I wish I could do cocoon mode, but I really can't just get rid of my friends and my job.
I fucking hate having to do things with friends and having to go to work, I just wish I could have infinite time train the way I want to. My fucking friends always get in the way. It's infuriating but I can't say no.
Fuck this shit.
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>>38192946
>surely there has to be better ways to making friends than meetup
I don't have a ranking of ways to make friends.
It's worked for me, and it's worked for many other people. It's very popular, give it a shot it's probably one of the best ways by far. I don't see what else could be better besides making friends in highschool/college (i'm guessig you've graduated now though).
>also, and I know the irony of this statement, but if they are my age and alone odds are they are fucked up in some way, no?
Maybe they just want to make new friends.
You're thinking far too much into this and trying to draw conclusions about a wide range of people.
How about instead, you go to 1 or 2 meetups for something you like, give it a fair shot and then see if you like it? Your time isn't as valuable as i imagien you're going to tell me it is right now
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>>38192632
>people really dont get how hard it is to make friends after you are like 25
40+ here, no problem with finding new friends and new girls. All you have to do is... yes, I know it sounds scary - talk to people
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>>38192798
This
I fucked up some marines because of not thinning my paints.
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>>38192363
Doin it right now
>not too shabby desu senpai
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>>38193366
talk to who? for what reason?
what is my reason for breaking the ice? why bother people doing errands?
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Thing is that you aren't allowed to focus on a hobby if you don't get paid for it, in societys eyes.
Play guitar 5 hours a day? Why aren't you in a band yet?
Lift everyday 6 times a week? Why aren't you an athlete/model yet?
Do MMA? Why aren't you pro yet?
People use this reasoning to not do anything with their lives and just work and go drink on friday. If they see someone obsessed with health and fitness they turn hostile immideately because they are intimidated by him.
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>>38193442
if you don't know to who you can talk and why, maybe it's time to consider suicide? It's like weightlifting, 10 000 people are picking heavy stuff up and putting it down, then this one sperg comes with "pick up what? where? for what reason? it's impossible to pick heavy stuff up and put it down"
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>>38193458
no, im willing to try
I just dont see the point of approaching random people, it's so awkward. it's a lot easier when it's a friend of a friend, but if you are by yourself...it just feels weird.
besides, why would randoms want to talk to a stranger?
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>>38193458
oh, and about cocoon bullshit, what others said - the only and one really important skill in life is ability to get into social interactions. If you have it, you have everything, if you don't - nothing else matters. And like with every other skills, it should be trained.
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>>38193471
just more excuses huh
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>>38193471
>it's so awkward
>.it just feels weird.
it's because you are a social cripple who can't form a coherent sentence. And you are like this because you don't talk to people. Turn off your computer for a month and go outside, you WILL talk to others out of boredom.
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>>38193496
not excuses, im realistic
meeting people solo is very difficult. especially when you dont know anything about them, and the odds of striking out are very high.
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>>38192363
One way shortcut to becoming an autistc fuck
Im living proof altough it wasnt by choice
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>>38193516
>meeting people solo is very difficult. especially when you dont know anything about them, and the odds of striking out are very high.
You just keep telling yourself that and making excuses.
Just because something is difficult (it's not but whatever) isn't an excuse not to try.
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>>38193496
>>38193508
Can you stop memeing the poor guy before he gets arrested?
Listen here, fag, NOBODY walks up to strangers and talks to them like it's an rpg. At best you'll get uninterested responses like 'mhm' and at worst you'll get arrested if they are feeling particularly shitty that day.
99% of people meet people through their job. You all work in the same place, you go through the same difficulties, you have tons of common shit to talk about. So if you don't have a job , get one if you want friends. Do not talk to people in the gym it makes you look autistic and i fucking hate people who try to talk to me when im training. Also most people in the gym go there after work and want to chil out and NOT talk to people.
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>>38193577
Yeah, this is how I make tons of friends by talking to them. Because it's so fucking impossible so I did it. Not on the streets, this happens but rarely - more like in places of common interest, such as events.
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>>38193556
so whats my reason for even saying hello?
kinda hard to break the ice with nothing in common
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>>38193605
sorry, I don't have time to explain, I'm going to visit people I never ever meet in person, I promised them some plant seedlings using facebook.
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>>38193605
Nothing, never mind.
Just keep making excuses dude. I'm sure you'll make some friends eventually, they'll probably make themselves.
Everything is 'awkward and weird', right? Why even bother trying
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>>38193659
meeting people through a job makes sense, but how do you even approach random people in public?
the only way I see this working at all is if a girl sees you and wants to fuck you. at that point it doesnt matter what you say. so in the case where that isnt true, why would a random person want to make friends with another random person, when you seemingly have nothing in common?
I dont want to get shot down 24/7, thats all.
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>>38193669
Don't talk to random strangers, try the meetup.com idea posted above. That's a better way to make friends.
have you taken a look at meetups in your city?
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>>38192363
>I'm unhappy
>I'm not good at socializing
>I know what will solve my problems: cut myself off from any human interaction entirely for months or years
Seems like a stupid fucking idea to me
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>>38192649
There is a checker at my grocery store who is literally autistic, they have one of those programs where they give jobs to disabled people.
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>>38193681
ive always been skeptical of meetups cause I dont want to meet autistic people/bronies/insert social rejects here
I can talk with people pretty easily, i've just lost friends as they have become married and obviously dont want to do stuff anymore.
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>>38193686
What? Are you stupid
Ignoring things you have problems with is the ultimate way to improve. Didn't you know?
If you're bad at running just don't run
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>>38192664
>Still get laid and hang out with friends
Sounds like you're not in cocoon mode, even slightly.
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>>38193706
Oh true.
Yeah there are a lot of autistic people (unlike yourself, you seem very social and non-autistic) and social rejects(unlike yourself, again). I can definitely see why you're passing judgement on other people. It's not like you don't have any friends so you're posting on an anime imageboard about how to make friends and refusing any advice you get and overthinking every possible situation.
Just keep doing what you're doing, I'm sure it'll come to you sooner or later
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>>38193721
what kind of people have no friends at an older age? I know im going to run into people with issues or whatever.
im not perfect obviously, but it just seems like a bad idea. I used to be really social I just grew apart from my friends as they started dating.
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>>38192363
is this an infographic for ants?
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>>38193707
Can't fail if you don't try
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>>38193740
No, kakunas.
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>>38193642
and the funny thing is, later I'm going to visit this guy I meed at the internet board for runners (hey, let's run together) and this girl I meet on facebook group for vegetarians (let's go camping together!), I organised a small event where they could meet and now they are married with a newborn.
Now, when I'm thinkink about this "how to meet friends" stuff, most of them I meet through chatrooms and facebook groups. Sure I meet people in real life daily and talk to them, but we don't have so many in common so it doesn't click.
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>>38192363
What do if I have chad-like qualities (good looking, smart, charismatic) and it's basically expected that I go out, fuck girls etc. but I love nothing more than hanging out alone in my room
I feel like it's a waste of potential. How do I train myself to be anti-cocoon and enjoy socialising
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>>38193784
This tbqfh
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I've tried making friends, people have even tried to friend me by asking me out to do stuff, but I always turn them down because I just cbf dealing with people. I'm that guy who leaves you stumped wondering what the fuck because I'm so friendly and chatty for the 5-10 minutes we spend together and you're left scratching your head how a friendly guy turned you down to become buddies.
I dunno why I do it, I guess I enjoy being at home on the computer without being disrupted more than anything.
Gym, cook, read, sleep, listen to music, fap.. I don't wanna go out and have normie conversations, most people are so fucking vapid anyway. If they read fit, I would likely take them up on their offer but if they don't even know what a chan is, why fucking bother with them?
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>>38192363
It's not legit
In theory it makes sense as only to using on lifting and eating will mean that you reach your goal body fast and then can reveal your power level in public.
In reality humans need social interaction and it's what keeps us happy. If you lock yourself up then your only going to ruin your mindset and even end up depressed. Once that happens you won't put 100% into your gym and eating and will end up miserable.
Cocoon mode is a meme
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>>38192580
>>38192441
>social gains
lol what a retarded way to frame social interaction
It really depends on the person. If you're a fully socially developed person who's only being held back by a lack of confidence from being overweight or grossly skinny, then I think its a solid idea. You'll come back strong from that month or so. Just make sure to keep yourself mentally enriched too.
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>>38192664
You sound awful
>>
I was in cocoon mode for quite some time and did exactly what people said. Life consisted of waking up, going to gym, tanning bed, and staying in the house and eating until the next day.
6 months down the road I made extreme gains, and started hanging out with people more. I had to regain social skills to an extent and even get over social anxiety all over again.
If I could do the same thing all over again and make the same amount of gains would I do it? Yes.
You can keep a balance though. You have a cheat day for a reason. Lift and then once you meet your macros, go to a party the night before cheat day so you can chill with bros and be a potato until you're back to lifting schedule. Or do this. LIFT WITH YOUR BROS. Bring them along the aesthetics journey as well.
But to each their own fella.
I don't care about people. They're fickle and shallow. Guys will want to be your friend when you're aesthetic because they think you know the "secret" to get girls, and girls will want to fuck you until they get the slightest whim of insecurity or whatever the fuck it may be. So I just don't put up with it. Most people aren't worth my time unless they've proven to be loyal faithful good genuine people, and that's rare.
Do whatever you want to achieve YOUR goal.
My goal is to lift to compete here within the next year, study for my personal training certification, maintain my 4.0 GPA and go to a better uni and graduate with an exercise science degree and already have an established personal training business, be an IFBB pro and have my shit together and already by the time I graduate college. Does that mean I have to go cocoon mode for 4 years? No. Does that mean i'll have to cut off any people who aren't in line with my goals? Yes.
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Does anyone have a strategy if you dont have any interests or hobbies? Unfortunately, I think this rues clubs and meet ups out.
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>>38193737
anon, you probably werent as social as you think
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>>38194657
>Does that mean i'll have to cut off any people who aren't in line with my goals? Yes.
ow the edge
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>>38192900
Oh, I get it. You want the secret to meeting people with similar interests in a completely natural, organic way where everyone's guaranteed to be comfortable and become friends.
Well I'm not telling you! We all know how to do that, but you don't get to know!
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>>38192363
>PRIME AUTISM EXACERBATOR
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>>38192363
in theory it works, but in practice it destroys your social skills and ruins any relationships you might have had. You can't lift the autism away. Most people just use it as an excuse to be beta fags.
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>>38192785
work hard and smart
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>>38192422
Social Anxiety fag here, staying away from people only makes it worse. Honestly the only thing that gets rid of it is a few beers
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>>38194657
this anon is right
>>38194898
no its not edgy when you realize that people, even your friends constantly compromise your goals
>hey bro lets smoke this joint
>no i have to study
>come on bro blaze it
you can replace joint with anything really
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>>38193642
>I'm going to visit people I never ever meet in person, I promised them some plant seedlings using facebook
and it's done. Pretty good, I must say - I'm not very diplomatic, not the worst speaker but very close, yet it was OK. They get seedlings, I got some vegan food from them, they told me about their businnes (vegan cathering), I offered to make them a website for free. Very nice people.
The secret is, we both have something to offer. They make and sell vegan food, I make websites and can use some SEO skills to help them with their scheme, then use their website for my own SEO profit. Chilli seedlings were just a reason to meet.
Now I am a little better in speaking and social interactions, while robots are a little better in making excuses.
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>>38192363
What happens to your body if you stop training? The same thing happens to your social skills if you stop using them. You'll become ever more of an assburger than you already are.
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>>38194837
>Does anyone have a strategy if you dont have any interests or hobbies?
yes
get an interest and a hobby
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>>38192363
Just do both
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