HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

>>94215458

>And the studio will not suffer any consequences from it, because Insurance and exploitation of broken tax systems and coverage

Can I be real for a second?

This board is fucking atrocious right now. You're all acting like a bunch of whiny, entitled little babies.

A tiny team of people made an animated adventure for you to embark on. They made it for YOU, and they're going to wake up tomorrow morning and see that instead of enjoying it, this community of "fans" picked out the 3 or 4 things that weren't perfect and are using that to fucking riot.

Guess what? The movie was never going to be perfect. It was never going to live up to your hype. It was never going to be everything you'd ever want in a movie.

What it WAS going to be was an impossibly epic adventure filled with action and funny shit. I just watched it for an hour and a half and it was exactly that. What more do you want?

Is it simple? Sure. Is it repetitive? Maybe. Is the product placement jarring and the jokes questionable and the structure unclear? Sure, fine.

But holy shit what do these people OWE YOU?

How fucking entitled do you have to be to have the appventure of a lifetime inside a smartphone and then say "yeah but…"

We should all be fucking weeping in our chairs right now at the sheer size and scale of the achievement. We should be showering the people behind this thing with the praise they deserve for pulling off one of the most inspiring movies in recent memory.

Sony Pictures doesn't owe you a good time. Yet they gave you 86 MINUTES worth.

If you have the fucking audacity to complain about it then you don't deserve it and you were never fans in the first place.

>>94215556
nice pasta

>>94215556
i hope you got paid to write this

>>94215556
see >>94215515

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>>94215556
look at him sperg

AHAHAHHAHA

>>94215458
That critic consensus took more effort than the movie's script

>>94215556

I'm gonna pirate it for the sake of shitposting, Sonygger.

>>94215556
well damn

>>94215556
I like the small details in this bait

>A tiny team of people
>Sony Pictures doesn't owe you a good time. Yet they gave you 86 MINUTES worth.
>you were never fans in the first place.

>>94215556
tl;dr
Sony didn't make this for anyone except the lowest common denominator: dumb children. It's a lazy cash grab. Sony deserves all the hate they get. They need to know it's not okay to make shitty films with no work put in. Children deserve better and you seem to not feel the same way.

>>94215556
The bait, she is good.

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>>94215556

>>94215594
All the shitposting about it was a better good time than the movie, Sony should make a sequel

>>94215458
The critics hate it
The fans love it

>>94215458
why are you laughing? is the movie that funny?

>>94215556
Jack pls

>>94215708

Yeah, but how many fans are there?

And fans of what exactly?

Is the first movie ever, how can you displease fans you never had?

>>94215556
So? If we can't mock its very existence, then what's the point?

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>>94215556
>the appventure of a lifetime inside a smartpho...

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>>94215708
>fans

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>>94215556

>>94215804
If you want to prove you're more mature than us, you're doing a pretty shit job of it.

>>94215556
>to be to have the appventure™ of a lifetime inside a smartphone™ and then say "yeah but…™"

>>94215556
Is this Tumblr? This level of antisocial autism is only possible there.

>>94215556
GUYS it's not bait.

I don't think pasta counts as bait, fish won't eat it.

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>>94215556

>All this pasta already

Please tell me that /co/ will make this the new Batman VS Superman

>>94215458
I will forever love that critic consensus

>>94215556
what movie was this originally for? can any meme experts trace this back to it's source?

>>94215515
>Trump sees the Emoji movie and gets so mad he changes the tax code specifically so that Sony gets rekt

>>94215982
B R A V O... Whorever directed this

>>94215982
BvS was actually good though so I don't think people will defend it as fervently. Still hoping for it though.

>>94216053
>BvS
>Good

>>94216069
You're right, sorry. It was a masterpiece.

I'd get more enjoyment out of this if it wasn't almost exactly the exact same situation as Pixels. Except this one is slightly more forgivable as it's supposed to be for younger children.

Shit movie gets a shit response, and it will do nothing to stop shit movies in the future from being made.

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>>94215556
Unless you got paid, there's not reason at all for display this unmeasureable amount of autism.

>>94215556
Is that the No man Sky pasta?

>>94216146
No. I remember that one had this really dumb line like "You aren't just in the minority, you ARE the minority"

>Make a neverever movie
>not a line about bloodborne
JUST

>>94215556
This is the the /co/ equivlant of "I'm sorry but did the Chargers already lose" copy pasta

>>94215556
yes..
good....

>>94216168

No, it was No Man's Sky.
Here it is.
----
Can I be real for a second?

This community is fucking atrocious right now. You're all acting like a bunch of whiny, entitled little babies.
A tiny team of people made an entire universe for you to explore. They made it for YOU, and they're going to wake up tomorrow morning and see that instead of enjoying it, this community of "fans" picked out the 3 or 4 things that weren't perfect and are using that to fucking riot.
Guess what? The game was never going to be perfect. It was never going to live up to your hype. It was never going to be everything you'd ever want in a game.

What it WAS going to be was an impossibly big universe filled with mysteries and weird shit. I just played it for 2 hours and it was exactly that. What more do you want?
Is it buggy? Sure. Is it repetitive? Maybe. Is the inventory system imperfect and the multiplayer feature questionable and the structure unclear? Sure, fine.
But holy shit what do these people OWE YOU?
How fucking entitled do you have to be to explore an infinite universe in a spaceship and then say "yeah but..."

We should all be fucking weeping in our chairs right now at the sheer size and scale of the achievement. We should be showering the people behind this thing with the praise they deserve for pulling off one of the most inspiring games in recent memory.
Hello Games doesn't owe you the world. Yet they gave you 18 QUINTILLION of them.
If you have the fucking audacity to complain about it then you don't deserve it and you were never fans in the first place.

>>94215556
tl;dr Take your bitch fit and fuck off

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>>94216444
Oh my god.

>>94216444
wasn't there one that ended with "thank you sean murray" or am I thinking of another pasta?

>>94216444
OH YEAH I remember this now.

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>>94215556
>Sony Pictures doesn't owe you a good time.v

Good thing they didn't deliver!

DO HO HO HO!

>Days without leeching the game division to keep the entertainment division afloat: 0

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>>94216543

>>94216010
Best timeline

>Trump demands new seasons of that show with the stupid dog

>This is the same studio that fired Spider-man because of "honor".

>>94215556
Don't make art if you can't take criticism

I watched the Emoji Movie in a theater earlier today. A friend of mine paid for the ticket, he was dragging me along for the meme value.
I would try to describe how bad the Emoji Movie is, but it is beyond your comprehension. Words cannot describe it. I'm scared that it was made, and I'm scared that people have, and are going to see it.
It reduces all of human achievement backwards by several decades, just for being made. Alien species, on making contact with us, will think less of our whole species for the existence of the Emoji Movie.
We could arrive at a foreign planet, and find sentient life banging rocks together and struggling to invent fire. We would attempt to subjugate them, but one thought, one concept, would light a fire in the strange organ that corresponds to their hearts that would never be extinguished.
The fact that, out of the whole of the galaxy, no matter what the future holds, it was us, humanity, that created the Emoji Movie, and not them.
Behold. I give you the superman. He is the . he is the madness.

>>94216633
Find who wrote it and we find the Antichrist

>>94215594
Would have been funnier if it was the poop emoji

I feel like this is, in some part, critics drawing a line in the sand and telling Hollywood they aren't accepting shit like this, almost like a reverse GG situation.

>>94216756
Critics love to tear apart bad movies when they're not getting paid to give it good reviews. That's why they're called critics.

>>94216633
I hate that people go see bland, soulless garbage ironically and the companies that made the garbage still make money off it. Sony is even counting on that, which is why they partnered with jacksfilms after he made those videos making fun of the film. It's exactly what Sony's planning on.

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>>94215458
>This movie should be filed under federal crimes.
>Why is it crime?
>not only do i feel robbed, you couldn't pay me to get away from this fast enough!
DOHOHOHO

>>94216633
>Words cannot describe it.
Have you tried...emoji?

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>>94216588
>Expecting Sony to make intelligent decisions.

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>tfw the movie will make the money back in less than a blink becaus normalfags and kids love dumb shit like this

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Guys what the fuck? I think I googled this movie maybe once a month ago to see if it was cancelled. Why the hell am I getting a notification for it? This has literally never happened before.

>>94216756
No, this is Critics playing to Hollywood's tune. This is exactly the buzz that whichever company made this shit wants. "Come one, come all to see the worst movie ever made. Oh, but we didn't say that because it wouldn't be cool if we were in on the joke. But seriously, watch it because it's bad. Call it irony, you little shits.."

Critics drawing a line in the sand would be silently boycotting the film.

The audience score is 48% now

>>94216897
welcome to the NSA/Ads inbreeding internet age!

>>94215556

>>94216898
>But seriously, watch it because it's bad.
At least half the reviews I've seen are telling people not to see this movie, or encouraging them to see or do literally anything else. So there's that.

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>>94215556

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>>94215556
Holy shit that is some fucking hilarious pasta autism

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>>94216916
kek

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>>94216814
emoji toys do sell well, any kids that I see with emoji merchandise always has those simple designs modeled after the iphone emojis. But with these movie emojis, their eyes are too complex to sell anything well for what should be a simple design.

>>94216898
Is that why everybody is saying "Seriously, this movie is dangerous, keep your kids as far the fuck away from it as possible"?

I watched it and it's fantastic. The critics saying otherwise are not smart enough to understand it. It is full of hidden meaning and underlying themes, it's incredible.
It's meant to be shallow at first glance because that's part of the message it's trying to send.

>>94217088
Go to bed, JOHN.

I saw it cause my friend got screener tickets for it and I never saw no to a free movie. (I live in LA so ticket prices here are pretty much $20).

It was indeed awful, but I did really like the sexual tension Sony REALLY tried to push with the devil and angel emoji.

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>>94217088

>>94215708
DWAYNE?

>>94215585
>falling for the piss easiest b8 imaginable

>>94215556
Was this pasta written back during the ASM movies? Alot of it sounds like it would have been.

>>94217128
>(I live in LA so ticket prices here are pretty much $20)

LAfag here. Do you exclusively go to the fucking Arclight? Ticket prices out here range from $11-15 and the higher prices or for 3D, IMAX or Dolby. Unless you're only going to high end specialty theaters, you're making no sense.

Go to a god damn AMC or Edwards. Damn.

>>94216868
No one went to see Norm of the north so i doubt it

What the fuck is wrong with Sony?

>>94217249
They're Sony. That's what's wrong with them.

>>94217249
They're run by monkeys.

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well /tv/ was right about one thing
this flick is lolikino

>>94217249

Well Sony did also make Baby this year, and that was great. And Spiderman, that was good, and yes, even Sausage Party. But man, when they miss they fucking MISS.

>>94216898
Here's the problem though. This movie isn't even funny bad it's just dull bad. Every review I've seen has pointed this out.

>>94217127
kek

>>94217249
A crazy woman runs the film division.

>>94216490
This movie, man.
I barely thought it would live up to the hype, let alone exceed it. I've been watching it for four hours straight across only two movie theaters and about five sound systems, and it has been absolutely and utterly humbling. My breath is being taken away at every turn.
I just laughed watching them desperately try to make their way out of the Candy Crush app, with ominous bots startling me from far across some rocky, eroded mountains against the backdrop of a massive dark blue system. Earlier I was marveling at a herd of grazing Emojis on a little yellow snapchat with a pink filter. Creatures were screeching in the distance and tinkling piano chords played in the background.
I very much appreciate the technical and leveling aspects such as CGI and voice acting, but most of all, this movie has been an extremely emotional experience for me so far. I could barely pull myself away from my first scene once I took a seat. No matter what I'm looking at, I have this excitement and this wonder and frustration that I am inevitably missing so much. I have never, EVER felt this lost. The Movie just beckons, wordlessly. What a beautiful, beautiful, titanic movie. I have no words.
Enjoy, everyone. And thank you, Sony and Tony Leondis. Jeez Louise.

>>94217278
>Baby
You mean Baby Driver? The only input they have there is making the brilliant decision to leave Edgar Wright alone and let him work.

>Spiderman
You can't tell me that this wasn't all Disney.

>Sausage Party
What the fuck anon?

>>94217335
Why are you still here?

>>94217335
>>>/tv/

>>94217278
>, even Sausage Party.
That movie was distributed by Columbia Pictures, not Sony.

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>>94215556

>>94217382
Wait shit, nevermind, apparently they're a subsidiary of Sony, sorry about that.

Now I realize Sony will never die, it will just live on in some other host body.

>>94217324
Isn't she the same person who suggested a Aunt May Solo movie based off Trouble?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GyM3eHf-zvE

>>94215556
>5556
anyone who couldn't tell this was pasta is retarded.

>>94217474
People know it was fake, they just want to be in the "Epic Screencap".

Is smiler actually Jailbreak's mom or was I bamboozled?

>>94217017
Seriously?
Because if true that is hilarious

>>94215458
I'm sorry, but did The Emoji Movie already lose best picture? Oh, that's right. It isn't even out yet. In fact, it comes out next month. Does not having box office sales before it's out count as a loss? Is that what you're saying? Because if you're saying that I can assure you that you're wrong. Why would you make this topic when the movie isn't out? The Emoji Movie is still playing next month and Sony has been the best studio in Hollywood for how many years now? It's playing during one of the worst seasons in film and Nolan just happens to have a lead because they're feeding off the energy of alt-right drumpfkins. But you know what? He still fucking sucks. Sony is still one of the best fucking studios in Hollywood, they had hits like Sausage Party and Don't Breathe last year and would have won Best Picture if Paul Feig didn't choke. Maybe you should shut the fuck up before you make retarded topics like this. You know why? Because you're going to be embarrassed when The Emoji Movie wins best picture and someone bumps this topic. Oh look at that, a critic just gave The Emoji Movie a fresh tomato. Are you a fucking drunk? Are you retarded? Are you autistic? You are a fucking idiot and you should never make a topic on this board again and I'm fucking serious. I almost have a feeling you're the only guy making all these anti-Emoji topics because you're a faggot hater who doesn't like the movie because it's good. Fuck you, be good at something in YOUR life and then maybe try to troll these fucking movies on the board, like I give a fuck. It's so easy to spot out your threads now, you're a retard. Always doing stupid shit like this. Why don't you try to be a good poster? Just for once? For once in your fucking life try not to make a topic like this. That's just you, you're always right at getting it wrong. Fuck you. You are nothing.

>>94217664
I feel like calling this bait would be an insult to bait.

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>>94215556

>>94217275
>a loli this good in a movie this shit

fuck this gay earth

i had no plans to see this movie
now i'm thinking of buying a ticket to see just how shit it really is

their strategy is working

>>94216543
I read that in the voices dammit!

>>94217732
Wait for the bootleg

>>94215556
saw this screencapped on /tv/

came here to laugh at you

>>94217780
>/tv/

There goes the thread.

>>94216818
You got me again!

>>94217701
lol nice job

Why do I feel Tony Leondis is posting all the pasta on here in a drunken stupor to justify his poor excuse of a life's work?

Why is there so many pastas in this thread?

>>94217836
the first one got a bunch of replies so summer /co/ tried to ride that post's coattails and post more

>>94216007

It was for No Man's Sky

>>94217898
he'll really just do anything these days, huh

>>94215458
I don't know things about tomatoes. What does Critic Consensus: no-sign mean?

>>94216010
>trump
>doing something that benefits the american people
nice joke, anon

>>94217917
Generally they try to sum up the general critics' view in a paragraph or so. Here they used one emoji as a sort of joke to sum up the complete critical rejection.

>>94217898
Talk about a shit stain on his career.

>>94217964
what if he died upon release.
>last credit to his name is the emoji movie

>>94217898
sad

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>>94217898
More like Pootrick Stoolwart

>>94217967
It'd be a load of bull.

>>94217998
>>94217997
>>94217964

do you all feel good about yourselves

>>94217249
They've been cursed by the ghost of Harold Ramis for raping his IP.

>>94218003
Two of them are mine, so pretty crappy to be honest.

>>94217997
ULTROS BOOGIE

>>94218003
I always feel good about myself

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I'm sorry I did this. These barely resemble the actual characters at all like humanizations should, but Smiler's old because she's the original emoji, and the mom's supposed to look like kind of a soccer mom.
Probably gonna draw more though

>>94218074
cute

>>94215556
http://vocaroo.com/i/s0be1qBcRSVQ

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>>94218300
>http://vocaroo.com/i/s0be1qBcRSVQ

LEGO is a thing. Angry Birds is a thing. Even advertising mascots are things.

Emojis ain't a thing. Why did they make a movie about a not-thing?

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WTF

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>>94215556
kek. 10/10 copypasta anon

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>>94218300
African booty scratcher?

>>94217249
Idiotic jews.

>>94215756

There has been an effort to make the emoji characters popular to children. McDonalds was giving away emoji plushies in Happy Meals for a while. If you go to the toy aisle in Walmart or Target, you'll see bins of emoji plushies there too.

>Disney makes Wreck it Ralph and Inside Out
>Sony: We'll make our own Pixar movie.
>Spend millions of dollars on rights to Emojis instead of making original characters and hiring people who know what they are dong.

>>94218614
But emojis isn't a thing. How do people keep making money off something that isn't a thing?

It just came out, and it's already outdated

>>94218625
They are a thing, It's just a dumb thing. I don't really understand your statement of "emojis are not a thing." it's the new retarded but fun leet speak for kids. Instead of spending 5x more creating one sentence out of not real letter, they do it with little pictures because it's fun to them.

Of course teens and kids are the biggest fans of these because it makes them feel unique and fun talking in a different manner than they have to for school and other shit.

>>94218706
Emojis aren't a thing like grass isn't a thing. It's just something that's there.

When did they stop being emoticons and start being emojis anyway?

>>94218706
Obviously they want it to be a thing so make money off something out of nothing.

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>>94218593

>>94218723
Smartphones. The main difference betwen emojis and emoticons is this: Emoticons are made through punctuation. So things like :-) and all that shit falls under the definition of emoticon. Even the shit the japanese do now in their phones are considered that. Emojis are just images. Mostly exclusive to phone use also, but that is slowly becoming globalized to PC use as well as you can see with discord and facebook.

>>94218300
Thoisoi?

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>>94218747

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>>94215458
>tfw you realize the word "emoji" and the ideograms themselves only exist because of Japan.

>>94218804
Two nukes weren't enough.

>>94216916
>52% of people with obviously no standards or expectations were still disappointed

>>94215556
Wew, theres a lot to pick apart there but I'm gonna go with

>Sony Pictures doesn't owe you a good time.

They actually do. I'm literally exchanging money to be given a good time.

>>94217275
a serious question here

What exatly is IT about her design that people like?

Im among the same group so dont misunderstand as not liking her but I just cant place WHY her design is good to me.

>>94215556
Look at me mom! No hands

>>94218617
Reminds me of a story an old (like, now in his 60's) programmer friend of mine told me.
He was working for one of the offices of a company that Atari acquired, and was just doing his job, when management came in, and ordered everybody to stop, because one of the executives form Atari was coming into the office, and he had big, important news that was going to "completely reshape the company's future."
So, they all get pulled into the cafeteria, and this executive, who has the biggest, shit-eating grin on his face, makes this bold proclamation: "We're going to make games based on fairy tale characters, because they are in the public domain, so we don't have to spend any money on licensing for the IP, and the public already knows about them so we don't have to spend any money on advertising, and this idea is going to save us so much money, and you don't even have to design the characters because everyone knows what they look like..."
The executive went on for about twenty minutes about how this idea was clearly the best thing ever, how "everybody knew" these classic fairy tales and it would be so incredibly cheap to make these games since there was no-go else profiting off the back end.
There was no design document, no interest in the content, no decision on type of game, not even an explanation of what system it would be for, just "fairy tales are cheap, get to it."
And then he left.
Nothing ever came of that meeting, because programmers are smart enough not to start a project with no goal or purpose.
Sony animation, is clearly not that smart.

>>94216444
How the hell did they manage to brainwash someone this bad

>>94218718
Grass movie 2019

>>94216825
hehe

>>94215556
Add me to the screen, 9gag!

>>94218962
The silver ratio, Japan's version of the golden ratio except more square-ish than rectangle. It's the same proportions as A4 paper. It's why /a/ is so popular

>>94216825

underrated post

>>94219480
what?

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>>94215556
Come on anon, you should have known by now this board is completely ran by Tumblr, even the /co/ mods are from there to. Even /v/ is slowly on its way to be ran by Reddit and NeoGAF, it shouldn't be surprising how many social media trash that are cross siting and taking control. Be real about THAT son.

That being said.
>They made it for YOU
You don't make things people don't ask for. 99% of the time you just piss people off.

>>94219801
Yup, just measure her facial proportions. Especially her eyes in relation to her face. Silver r/a/tio

Now you know

Hot white people have perfect golden facial ratios

>>94216897
The lesson is to never google anything.

>>94217732
>>94217763
The theater experience might be worth it, especially in an "urban" neighborhood.

>>94216897
Duh, Facebook and whatsapp probably has a catalog of all the illegal stuff you fapped to. This is not surprising

I vote we destroy every copy of this movie when it comes out on DVD and Blu-Ray.

>>94215556
put me in the screencap senpai!

>>94219850
Im not good at that ratio stuff anon,

no seriously I was never good at math, please explain for dummies.

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>>94215556

>>94215515
this is some springtime for Hitler shit isn't it?

>>94215556
Shut the FUCK UP Tony VINCIQUERRA

>>94218519
wtf
indeed

>>94215458
Serious question, but why are you guys being so autistic over this one movie? Okay, it's shit, most people could tell it will be shit since they announced it, but what singles this one shitty movie out as a target for this level of sperging? Is it because it's made by Sony?

>>94222229
The title sums the reason behind the hate

>>94222229
People want this movie to fail because if it doesn't, we're gonna see a rise in this kind of shitty animation in the future.

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>>94215556
Theme music for this pasta
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gIuotFZnBtk

>Why tf am I seeing posts from people saying not to take your children to see the emoji movie?

>From what I tell of the synopsis it’s about completely breaking out of the mold society puts on you because of a natural neurodivergence.

>Do you not understand how many neurodivergent children need to see this message wrapped in a movie with visuals they can understand. Autistic children especially, since they have trouble with communication. Emojis and other images have been helping us communicate with people for a long time. Immediately they will become engaged because they already understand the social situations being portrayed (which is rare).

>So fucking what if you think emojis are dumb charcter designs or if you think the animation is bad. YOU ARE NOT THE TARGET AUDIENCE. You have every right not to see the movie but don’t try to convince other people not to take their children, especially when it has the potential to help children who too often already go without help.

>>94215556
>How fucking entitled do you have to be to have the appventure of a lifetime inside a smartphone and then say "yeah but…"
thats when i saw it was a bait

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It moved up

>>94222548
>Autistic children
>4chan
>not the target audience

>>94222592
And even then, the only "good" review calls the movie mediocre.

RT should really add a middle ground between rotten and fresh.

>>94215458
I'm so tired of hearing about this movie. Everyone wants to dunk on it but when a legitimately good animated movie comes out it's crickets. Fuck that. And fuck all these soullessly polished movies.

>>94222592
Who was it?

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>>94222592
>>94222622

pic related

>>94222622
It's a review where she says it's "meh" and it's considered positive?

I actually worked for the same company being paid to post stuff here when Sony hired them during the Ghost Buster's thing, now I work for one doing another big company's shilling.

Honestly threads like this just fill me with dread. In 10 years we are going to have bots who are able to write this kind of stuff and people like me will just be filling out captchas.

What the fuck is the world going to be like then? How will anyone tell what's real and what's not? The worst part is if this wasn't 4chan you wouldn't be able to tell these people apart from the Billy Bob Everyman who just really really likes Larry the Cable guy and so Cars 2 is amazing and Cars 3 is going to be better. We will have thousands of them.

Places like this won't be immune for much longer. It's scary. Tbh.

>>94217249
Nothing? This thing is the definition of made-by-committee movie based on market analysis and current trends.

Expect a fidget spinner movie from either Sony or other studio soon.

>>94222592
Fucking hell, there's always the one asshole that wants attention.

>>94222592

Was it Arnold White?

>>94222756
>calling Armond Arnold

Pleb

>>94219411
There already was a grass movie it was called The Happening by M. Night Shabadoo

>>94222730
To be fair, it's really hard to get a rotten from Common sense media, unless it's a hardcore XXX porn movie.

>>94222592

>3%

Boo, you whore.

>>94215556
Shut up, Jerry.
Popeye died for this shit.

>>94215556
There are so many replies to this post, nobody will notice I'm a girl.

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@94222934

>>94217920
Well maybe not you, Paco, but you're not technically American anyway.

>>94215556
I think they made it for (YOU)

>>94215556
Even the faggots at TV Tropes, the guys who have to suck the dick of almost EVERYTHING, are bashing this movie. That's how bad it looks.

>>94222652
so is this movie a kid's movie

if so whats with the very harsh critics blasting it

>>94215556
I don't understand how a rehash of a shitpost in favor of No Man's Sky got so many replies.

>>94215860
underrated

>>94215556
>They actually replied to the edited No Man's Sky pasta
This board is fucking dogshit

>>94215607
I'm going to pirate it and then not watch it.

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>>94219411
If it's another Microcosmos why not.

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America's is consumer city. Suddenly hates corporate greed?

People here would probably like Norway's tugboat movie than this.

>>94223377
Well you replied too.

Best news I heard all day

>>94216897
Seriiusly though, why can't google just asks us right away instead ofbtrying to guess
Like, let us manyally build a number of profiles so we have better control over search results and ads

This movie will be a massive success.
Kids eat up anything with lots of color and goofy stuff on screen.

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>>94218300
God bless you and whatever shit part of the shit-world country that spawned you, my friend

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>>94218300
Underrated Post

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>>94219956
It's a ratio that when followed can make really appealing looking shapes.

>>94216133
stop taking the bait, summerfag

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>>94215556

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>>94215458

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/co/ BTFO!

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How will anons ever recover!

>>94216897
Is that a Sony phone?

>>94224387
>>94224394
Okay who do i believe in?

>>94224387
Well shit, looks like it's a good movie.
>The only positive review is a 3/5 that still says the film is "meh" in the summary

>>94217898
He's well past the age of caring anymore.

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>decide to check my local movie theater to see how it's doing
>see this

>>94224714
>SOLD OUT
n-nani??

The person who pitched the idea for The Emoji Movie should have been fired on the spot, and blacklisted.

>>94215556
hi sean murray

>>94224714
I was gonna make a joke about some guy who went to a theater showing with a shitload of guns and found himself in an empty room but now I do hope some asshat shoots up a theater.

I read the final chapter of the novelization to confirm just how fucking terrible it is and get this: One of the major subplots is resolved by an act of god (or rather, the kid holding the cellphone doing something on a complete whim)

>>94217898
The man has years of respect and money from acting on stage, tv and film. He probably takes jobs for the lols at this point.

>>94215556
>>94215653
This is one of the most well crafted pastas I have seen in recent days
>reddit spacing
>entitlement callouts
>gatekeeping fandom
>misrepresenting team behind product
>it wasn't perfect

The being that made this has studied reddit exxtensively and produced a work of art

>>94215458
At what point did anybody look at this idea and think it was a good one?

>>94215556
>guranteedreplies.exe
Holy shit the newfags in this board. And I thought /pol/ was easy to bait

>>94223278
Because it fails at even being that

>>94215556
Holy shit man this was fucking gold.

ARMOND WHEN

>>94218614
Exactly. You'll see them in stores and bins, but you'll never see them carried around by kids. They aren't selling merch. Every single person who understands what a cell phone is knows that the premise of this movie is fucking retarded and wants nothing to do with it. The only people who are paying to see it are hoping for a freak show.

>>94215556
bait 8/10
you almost got me...but
> We should be showering the people behind this thing with the praise they deserve for pulling off one of the most inspiring movies in recent memory.
>most inspiring movies in recent memory.
yeah... sure

>>94222652
Of course it's fucking Common Sense Media.

>>94217088
shut up snyder, your movies suck

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>>94224794
>The Emoji Movie
>the novelization

>>94216010
>Trump
>not changing laws specifically so these loopholes can be exploited more easily by people like him.

>>94225003
Yes, the Junior Novelization, several of which I've seen at my employer's return counter.

>>94215556
There he goes
There he goes again

>the only fresh review is from a middle aged woman who probably doesn't completely know how to use internet and for her it looked like a random colorful cartoon
We're still good.

>>94216897
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_kBlH-DQsEg

>>94218962
>round imperfection-less face
>big puppy eyes
>small mouth and nose
>long Thick hair
>long neck that's too long but half of it is covered by a scarf so it looks both long and concealed giving a sense of shyness
Gee I wonder

>>94224714
See? kids love those yellow little shits, there's no escaping it; parents these days are just incapable of saying "no". At least back in my day we had to throw a big tantrump to get something and more that half the time it would be a slap but these days the kids don't even know crying or yelling because they don't need it.

>>94224854
Most of the replies are the same person.

>>94224854
>>94225372
And the rest are about the original No Man's Sky post.

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>>94216543
10/10

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>>94222934

>>94225331
Do you not know anything about kids these days?

In the store I work at one of our products are fidget spinners, and there are CONSTANT tantrums happening because parents not getting one for their kids. I'm talking like screeching as loud as possible while flailing on the floor tantrums

>>94224816
>reddit spacing

this meme needs to die, go back to /tv/ please

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>>94217275

>>94225446
Wouldn't the solution there be just to let them wear themselves out? When they're tired you pick them up and take them home.

>>94225487
HelIo reddit

>>94225524
Kids can go for a long fucking time, man. My Little Brother had a tantrum that lasted over half an hour.

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>>94225504
>shadman

>>94220035
That's what I'm wondering. I can't wait for the documentary about the REAL story behind The Emoji Movie ten years from now.

>>94215556
Gold

>>94225446
Really? I go tot the supermarket and they don't, when a kid throws a tantrum it doesn't even last a second because the parent is already appeasing their demands.
Only times I hear kids cry is because they fight over things they want.

>>94225331
I hope you're not implying that you expected parents to oppose this shitty movie.

Let's face it, the majority of people who go to see movies will watch it without being aware or caring in the slightest about of a bunch of angry nerds being outrage about it on the Internet. Normal people who aren't into modern medias like comics, videogames, etc. just don't give a shit about the quality of these kind of products when they consume them, they see the little quirky faces featured in the movie are the same ones on their phone and think "wow this looks fun :) what a great and relatable premise for a normal person like me, this movie doesn't look deep or hard to get or anything like that, I'll use it to get my quick fix of harmless mainstream-approved fun, haha :)".
And of course there's kids. Kids are dumb and will lap up ANYTHING, even moreso those of today rather than past generations since digital-age social pressure compels them to act "up to date" and care about stuff other "cool" and popular people are into. Maximum exposure to advertisements, celebrities being paid to talk about it and a plethora of knock off stickers, gadgets and whatever featuring this little yellow turds ensures they see this movie as something they are supposed to like.

It will be a mild success at worst, there's no escaping it.

>>94225541
hello /tv/, your memes are shit

please go and stay go

>>94224714
>Sold out
ENEMY STAND!

>>94224267
So this is the final lesson...over and over...thank you, /co/...that's all I can think to say right now.

>>94225572
Honestly the fact that he's well aware of this catdog meme is just hilarious.

>>94225655
You're right in that normalfags don't care much about quality or deeply analyze shit too much like some of us do, but when you say that even as individuals they don't have some standards that's over exaggerating. They may not rant on the internet and with their friends about the state of the film industry and the exploits of the big capitalist market but the can at least tell sometimes when a movie is just dumb. And that's what I've seen, normal people who go out and have mainstream approved fun all the time do know that the emoji movie is a dumb as bricks concept.
And I didn't expect parents to strongly oppose the movie, but I could've entertained the idea that they would have some control on the kind of media they want their kids to watch and would've disliked the idea of taking them to watch such a shitty concept when there are other movies out there right now that are more promoted by the mainstream media for "modern family values" and shit like that. I didn't expect theaters to be empty, but I am beyond shocked to find about screenings actually selling out.

>>94224714
Someone on /tv/ got a ticket.

>>>/tv/85572250

>>94215556
dude screencap lmao

>>94222668

Look on the bright side anon. If computers get smart enough to write completely natural looking replies, then those computers are also smart enough to automatically detect and remove those replies.

>>94224714

BRAVO.

>>94225846
he is?

>>94226469
Yes.

https://twitter.com/Shadbase/status/885404914356150272

On Thursday, the Emoji Movie was beaten by Atomic Blonde, only making $900,000: http://variety.com/2017/film/news/box-office-atomic-blonde-emoji-movie-thursday-1202509367/

>>94225673
It is way too easy to trigger /co/mblr

>>94226651
How much was the budget of the Emoticon film?

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>>94216543

>>94225446
This is why you spank them when they do something fucked up like that.

>>94226685
$50,000,000

>>94226685
$50 million

>>94225524
Hope you got all week. Their little bodies require less fuel to keep going, so they can cry for hours and hours.

I should know. My upstairs neighbor's kid is in the habit of three-hour tantrums.

>>94216053
Emoji movie is better than BvS though

>>94215709
about as funny as a pile of burning fat people.

>>94216543
>>94216818
why has no one made a "mystery science theater" type show of just Statler and Waldorf ripping bad movies

>>94217249
it's Sony, they live in a weird alternate reality. Read the leaked emails, you'll see what I mean

Reading the leaked emails is bizarre, it's like watching aliens talk to each other about humans, I'm not even sure they are human

>>94217339
Sony had control of casting, which outside of the 2 leads, was the worst part of Spider-Man, and some story input, which if you've read the leaked emails, you can completely tell which scenes were Sony's idea

>>94226660
>/tv/ anon tries to push dead newfag /tv/ meme
>/co/ anon says it's shit
>TRIGGERED! /CO/MBLR!

lad

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>>94216868
>>tfw the movie will make the money back in less than a blink becaus normalfags and kids love dumb shit like this
CR was right. White people and the west are not worth saving.

>>94217505
why

>>94219372
I don't think the author of that post was sincere
I think they were just trying to rile up people for an entertaining thread

>>94219372
You must be new here
Every post on /v/ is made of bait.

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>>94224647
They're both liars
This is the greatest movie in existence

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How could we fix the Emoji Movie?

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>>94215458
>the biggest and brightest of the American left in an attempt to battle against Donald trump came up with The EMOJI MOIVE

>>94227412
/pol/ pls

>>94226976
Link?

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>>94227408

>>94225331
>tantrump

>>94227433
Im not /pol/ Im just pointing out that this movie was

>>94227408
Porn of jailbreak.
Preferably futa since it was cause /pol/ to have an aneurysm
>implying shadman isn't making this as we speak

>>94227510
>some shitty exploit movie
>IT WAS A LEFTIST ATTACK ON OUR PRESIDENT
>not /pol/

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>>94222652
It's just some old confused hag who didn't like it that much.

There has to be some middle ground rating for RT.

>>94217898
He's pulling a Robert DiNiro. He doesn't give a fuck anymore and is willing to do shit that he finds fun.

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>>94227539
>IM SILLY

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>>94227412
>the biggest and brightest of the American left in an attempt to battle against Donald trump came up with The EMOJI MOIVE

Proofs?
Main villain of this movie looks like a cartoony Hillary Clinton - that alone kinda spoils such a hypothetical intent.

>>94227412
/pol/, please stop appropriating the shittiest aspects of society. The well is already poisoned.

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>>94227539
>>94227510
>>94227433
>>94227412
Okay, found proofs.

>>94228182
That's like a fucking simpsons "Stock Photo" joke.

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>>94227408
there's only one way

>>94228182

>voice actor

Okay, now how about someone who actually matters?

>>94222652
I think we found the movie's target audience

>>94215556
They did a bad job then.

>>94217382
Just an FYI, Sony distributes under these names

Columbia Pictures is their mainstream stuff

Tristar is for smaller projects, but still a bit mainstream. Also distributes most of their Christian movies with the exception of

Affirm Films, Sony's Christian movie label. Sometimes they distribute under this, sometimes they just produce

Sony Pictures Classic is their arthouse label, and the only division that I don't hate (Whiplash, The Red Turtle, Crumb)

I'm pretty sure SPC is United States only though

>>94227303
Should've gave the 90% movies 0% for shits and giggles.

>>94215556
I remember No Man's Sky

>>94215556
I'm saving this for /v/

>>94215556
Great copypasta tho

>>94218300
Thank you anon

>>94223795
>kino

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r8 my screencap

1) Shit
b) Extra shit
iii) Emoji movie-tier shit
Quatro) why u no include epic reaction images?

>>94227408
Cinematic universe with Foodfight

>>94228596
If you want to make it really epic for the win, you should include the reaction images.

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>>94215556

>>94215556
This is brilliant

>>94228596
fuck off

>>94228596
You didn't even try/10.

>>94228182
>some nobody says some retarded shit for attention
dont take the bait, newfriend

>>94228596
It's just the No Man's Sky pasta, why is it a big deal?

>>94228895
Considering he felt the need to post the screencap, he's either a newfag or has a extra chromosome

>>94215556
>never going to live up to your hype
What hype?
Haven't you been on any of the thousands of threads of people talking about and placing bets on how bad it was going to be

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>>94215556

Nice copypasta

I can't believe this wasn't on /tv/ first

>>94228614
>click "Yes" button

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>>94215556
huh, what?

>>94227303
I fucking hate kei-tai but not as not as EmojiShit

So whose going to bite the bullet for all of us and get a Soda Cam recording of it?

>>94228895
>why is it a big deal?

Ask everyone who replied to it

>>94224710
Sometimes that's a good thing
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cAkl0_Fs3kc

I'm a """movie reviewer""" for my College newspaper and not even meme-ing with you guys but like while watching this movie for the first time in my entire life I was mouth agape and at a loss for words...the product placement in this movie was actually fucking insane like they were namedropping facebook and instagram and "pokemon go to the polls"-tiers of trying to be cool.

I'm actually disgusted that this movie's budget was only $50 million because Sony is less likely to bomb.

Some websites predicted this film is gonna make $90 million. Would that be enough for Sony to make a franchise out of this shit?