Ultimate Marvel Storytime >What's being storytimed?

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Was going to do this yesterday, but some things came up. Let's finish this universe!

>>83484939
Dude.
Holy shit.
It's been weeks, how can you dtill be doing this?
Are you okay? Is your brain still working?
Must've been hard, working through so much shit.
Please tell me we're almost done.

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>>83485030
>Are you okay? Is your brain still working?
It's supposed to be mushy right?

>Please tell me we're almost done.
Almost! Finishing it tonight!

Cataclysm #0.1
Ultimates: Cataclysm #1-3
Cataclysm #1-5 (storytime of pain)
Survive #1 (storytime of pain)
All-New Ultimates #1-12 (storytime of pain)
Ultiamte FF #1-6 (shit art, god tier writing)

>>83484982
Oh, so this is what people meant when I asked about 1610 Vision.
How the fuck does this romance even work?

>>83485110
>He cannot be stopped.
>He must be stopped.
Bitch, you fucking what.
Are you daft?
Who the hell programmed this faulty A.I.?

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>>83485123
Same as 616 Vision and Wanda I suppose

>>83485181
I feel sorry for Sam.

>>83484939
> 0.1

Marvel has just completely lost it at this point, haven't they? Because they clearly don't know what a ".1" issue is anymore. I picked up that big Deadpool teamup issue, which was split into a bunch of .1s when it should have just been Deadpool #13. That's not how Point Ones work, Marvel!

>>83485161
>The Thing is still made of rock.
Then when the fuck does he go purple?
Did I miss that already?

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>>83485220
My favorite was the Fantastic Four .1 where it followed the F4 from another universe and was even admitted by Brevoort to be a terrible jumping on point.

>>83485251
Nah, he can turn it off and on.

>>83485286
>he can turn it off and on.
I'm just gonna stop asking.
Fuck this god damned Universe.

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>>83485324
kek I thought it was neat

So, OP, what are you gonna do once you're done?
Where will you go?
Will we be able to see you again some day?

>>83485369
>Breed Richards.
Ew, no.

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>>83485447
Storytiming Jonathan Hickman's runs on SHIELD, Secret Warriors, Fantastic Four, Ultimate Marvel, Avengers, and the entire Secret Wars event.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HKtsdZs9LJo

>>83485478
>Breed Richards
Keep reading

>>83484939
Thank you for this entire storytime OP! I havent read any of these before and its one of my favourites now.

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>>83485558
You're welcome anon, thanks for reading!

>>83485550
>That spoiler.
Now I know for sure you've gone mental, mate.

>>83485550
>Keep reading
Please don't tell me someone actually fucks the madman.
Who would do such a thing.

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>>83485666
Better than that, Satan.

>>83485738
This cover is pretty nifty.

>>83484982
Did I miss something with Ultimate Vision? Cause last I saw in Reconstruction they weren't a robot body.

>>83485800
>Evil space robot giantess.
That's something I'd expect to read on one of those fetish threads on /aco/. Not on a Marvel comic.
My God.

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>>83485855
Based Fialkov was here to save the Ultimate Universe.

>>83485876
1610 MODOK is absolutely nuts.
What the fuck went wrong in his life, I wonder.

>>83485916
>That fucking anatomy in the last panel.
Wew, laddies.

>>83485995
I see Herc is fucking based no matter what Universe he's in.
That's great.

Glad to see you're back OP.

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>>83486114
Thanks anon, good to see you too

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To be continued in Ultimate FF, but first...

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STORYTIME OF PAIN

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This isn't as bad as Ultimate End, but it's worse than Ultimatum

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I can't decide if the flying Triskelion is cool or not

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I like that Thor design and having the F4 members on Ultimates is cool, but why did this have to be Bendis?

>>83486342

What an horrid cover.

>>83486355
At least Galactus wasn't defeated with venom blasts who the fuck is buying Bendis' comics? Why won't Marvel fire him or Slott

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>>83486763
Everything in this is awful. The art is awful, the colors are awful,

>>83486487

I hate this page. Can the new 616's Triskelion fly?

>>83486528

It's not. It looks retarded.

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>when you forget to turn off auto
The writing is awful, the lettering is awful, and the covers are awful Just wait until you see who dies and how they do it.

>>83486802
616 has a Triskelion now? Let me guess, it's heavily MCU inspired.

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>>83486756
>>83486782
>Ben changes between pages for no reason

The worst part of the Ultimates was "Reed's revelation".

Bullshit.

>>83486855

Well, it looks like the Ultimate one. It's the base of "The Ultimates" and the Wakanda embassy.

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>>83486904
???

>>83486911
I suppose that's something at the very least

>>83486950
I mean of Cataclysm.
When Bendis writes Reed turning good again because he saw his 616 life. It's bullshit.

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Fucking hell

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>>83486983
Oh, yeah. At least SpOck was acknowledged

>>83486985
Bendis should have been barred from Ult. Reed.

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>>83487030
Bendis should have been barred from Marvel. I wonder if DC would scoop him up if he got fired. he's written for them before.

>>83486905
Why is ultimate cho bald?

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>>83487070
To let more oxygen into his brain???

It's funny how similarly paced Cataclysm and Ultimate End are.

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>>83487157
They may as well be the same comic

>>83486325
Man I love Machine Man, every incarnation of him. Bump

>>83487137
>reed getting choked
Who the fuck approved this shit

>>83487137

Reed don't need to breath, don't he?

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>>83487199
Thanks

>>83487204
Just wait, it gets worse

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>>83487219
Nope, no organs.

>>83487230
Fuck. Reed admitting he was a sociopath is the most Bendis has ever gotten on my nerves.

And this is right after Fialkov retconned that shit

>>83487230
Sadly, I would've been surprised if it didn't get worse.

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>>83487117
I am so mad right now I can't even see straight

>>83487305
>Spider-Pig plushie.
What.
>>83487347
Oh, hey, Bendis remembered Spider-Men was a thing.
Holy shit, that's impressive.

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>>83487379
I thought the plushie was cute

>>83487383
Oh god fuck this shit.
Reed already knew all of this.

Didn't Bendis read UFF?

>>83487367
Fucking hell, did they actually just reuse an entire page?

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>>83487411
Read it? He wrote for it!

>>83487422
YEP! In the SAME issue

>>83487443
I mean, the Marvel Zombies crossover.

Reed KNEW how other versions of him lived.
This is bullshit.

>>83487383
>>83487406

Disgusting.

>>83487462
I missed Ulti X-Men, who's Jimmy's mom?

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>>83487472
I know, but the fact that he doesn't even keep up with books he's written for in such a small continuity boggles my mind

>>83487476

Bendis waifuism is about to became ultimately retarded.

>>83487502
Magda Maximoff

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>>83487502
He;s siblings with Quicksilver and Scarlet Witch so Magda Lensherr

>>83487536
OH GOD I FORGOT ABOUT THAT

>>83487552

Is that true?? Magnito a cuck.

>>83487561
>>83487552
Wait, fucking what?
Logan fucked Magneto's Wife?
How even.

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>>83487608
Ultimates 3

>>83487629
So...
>>83420486?
Is that where it happens?

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>>83487689
No. >>83379638

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RIP ULTIMATE CAPTAIN AMERICA fuck Bendis

>>83487739
Thanks, man.
Guess I have things to catch up on.

>>83487763
He had it coming ever since he let Peter die.
I for one am glad.

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Fuck this comic

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When waifuism gets out of control

>>83487867
Deus Ex Kitty to the rescue!
Fuck you, Bendis, at least try harder to mot make it so damn obvious.
It's disgusting.

>>83488000
OP, I'm so sorry that you have to suffer through this shit.
My condolences, truly.
But thanks, anyway. You're a great man, and I love you.

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>>83488034
Love you to anon, thanks for suffering with us.

>>83488053
Got nothing better to do.
It's either this or reading Avengers Disassembled and House of M.
I chose the lesser evil.
Besides, I got you to make this more tolerable.
I'll miss you once this is over

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>Ultimate Thor and Rick Jones were not in the Ultimate Universe when it went.
I wonder where they are and how Galactus got out.

>>83488097
Well bye Thor

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>>83488096
I'll still be around >>83485550

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>SHIELD helped take down Galactus
>Better dismantle it!

>>83488340
Cap didn't want children on the battleground, but yeah sure he would've loved this

>>83488312
>Valeria has her FF suit in this.
>>83487305
>But she's wearing a blue variation here.

Who do I blame for this fuck up?
Artist? Colorist? Bendis?

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>>83488408
Everyone

>>83488449
You're probably right.
Bunch of mediocre fucks that can't follow five issues worth of continuity.

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Your enjoyment of this will vary from person to person.

All New Ultimates was horrible for me. I honestly believe this would've been better if written by Bendis. He did create all these chaacters

>>83488481
>This is classified as storytime of pain.
Why? I remember it being extremely mediocre, but was it that offensive?
What the fuck does this book even do to make everyone hate it?

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>>83488549
>>83488534
I hated it too
>silenced mango

>>83488571
Jesus fucking christ.
This art is horrible.

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Will say this, Fiffe's passion was great. His blog showed that he knew his Marvel stuff and was actually trying.

>>83488605
Too bad he failed.

>>83488605
I miss it when Bombshell would curse left and right every other sentence.
That definitely is better than this.

>>83488619
Someone please remind me why Jessica decided to turn dow the Spider-Woman name in favor of Black Widow.
Like, it makes no sense to me looking back.

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>>83488695
Because reasons

>>83488724
That makes perfect sense.

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I also don't like that Fiffe has Jessica turn full dyke in this. It feels very pandery especially since Johnny got her spidey sense tingling. I'd believe bisexual, but those don't exist according to Tumblr

>>83488785
>Johnny got her spidey sense tingling
10 bucks say that's intended to be an euphemism for sex.

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>>83488846
They made out

>>83488911
Does anyone in 1610 ever get laid?
Or fo they all just die being fucking virgins?

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>GOAT covers
>shit interiors
The Marvel Method

Bump...welcome back, Mate.

>>83488948
First damn page and everything is already a fucking mess.
Gotta give props to the writer. How often does that happen?

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>>83488955
Die virgins.
>inb4 Preacher Anon posts the Ultimate porn

>>83489006
Thanks

>>83489032
>Die virgins
Fuck this universe, then.
Glad it's gone.

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>>83489061
You won't be saying that after Ultimate FF

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Why is everyone so damn ugly?

>>83489128
Better question.
Why are you so damn sexy?
You make us all look ugly in comparison.

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>>83489187
>gulp
Th-thanks anon

>>83489196
I wonder if anyone actually believed that she'd stay gone

>>83489196
Two ossues in and someone already "quits" the team.
I hate this shitty trope.