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Ask a 34 year old kissless virgin anything.

The stories and information posted here are artistic works of fiction and falsehood.
Only a fool would take anything posted here as fact.

Thread replies: 123
Thread images: 8

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Ask a 34 year old kissless virgin anything.
>>
>>729750527
What do you really want?
>>
>>729750615

Be happy?
>>
>>729750527
Don't off yourself just yet.
>>
>>729750527
31 kissless virgin here
how do i not become you?
>>
>>729750645
By what actions?
>>
Do you have a good job ?
>>
>>729750693

why the fuck are you asking him
>>
>>729750527
why not just buy a hooker and be done with it brother?
>>
Buy prostitutes
>>
>>729750663

Don't plan to.

>>729750693

Don't age I guess. Offing yourself would accomplish that.

>>729750829

Shitposting and violently masturbating.

>>729750873

Haha. No. Been looking for a job for more than a year now and meanwhile working half days in a supermarket.
>>
>>729750527
How ugly are you?
Do you have social issues?
What have you done to change the situation if it bothers you?
>>
>>729750878
because i'm desperate and out of ideas
>>
>>729750527
>>729750693
Buy a whore and get it over with, you fucking losers
>>
>>729750966
Why haven't you fucked yet and why do you chose to remain a loser
>>
>>729750527
Why?
>>
>>729751014
>How ugly are you?

Plainly average. 5/10

>Do you have social issues?

Yes. I'm a spaghetti machine.

>What have you done to change the situation if it bothers you?

Tried to chat up girls. Going to bars, taking courses, online dating etc.
>>
Hit the gym
>>
>>729750693
>24 virgin
>Meet a girl who was working as a laundry contractor in the plant where I worked
>Knew her when we were kids together in middle school
>She's got two kids
>Ask her for coffee
>Bring her home after
>Bra off making out on the sofa
>She tells me basically she's a hellua slut
>Second date
>Making out on the sofa
>Tell her I had a crush on her when we were kids
>She was with the guy she later had the kids with
>Tell her I'm a virgin
>"Will you take my virginity?"
>She says yes
>I take her to the bedroom
>Clothes off, lay down, she kisses me, grabs my cock
>Diamonds
>"Put me in you"
>Oh yeah, she says. Moves my cock head around her entrance to get it wet
>Sinks down on my cock
>Gives me like a second to get used to it
>So hot and wet inside
>She rocks back and forth on my cock getting more excited
>Tells me later it was just hot to take a guy's virginity, she'd never done that
>I know she's on a copper IUD
>Tell get I'm going to come
>"Can I come in you?"
>Oh yes do it, your first time!
And that was how I lost it. What a great experience. We did it a few more times after, but even 20 years later I remember my first.

You've got to do it. Make friends. Have sex with one.
>>
>>729751241
>Yes. I'm a spaghetti machine.
Wot?

What happened on your dates etc.?
I do understand being shy and not taking any first steps but eventually you usually stumble over a grill who will...
>>
>>729751009
Do you WANT to be a kissless 30 something virgin forever?
>>
>>729751353

OP here. I do. Regularly. But I am still far from being buff and I have reached a plateau.
>>
Why do you keep posting this you clueless morons?
>>
>>729751241
If what you're currently doing isn't working then stop doing it you loser. Lower your standards and make yourself look decent. Lose weight if you're fat, get a clean haircut. Nicly fitted cloths. Be confident and look confident. If you have bad habits fix them. Make yourself desirable. Clean your room and house if it's messy. Be clean.
>>
>>729751353
is this a solution to that all?
i mean seriously, i wanna know
>>
>>729751467
Post a selfie
>>
>>729751449

Never even managed to secure dates.

>I do understand being shy and not taking any first steps but eventually you usually stumble over a grill who will...

Taking first steps is usually (though scary) not the problem. Not looking like a fucking autist while doing so is the problem.
>>
>>729751241
Learn to recognize and then target girls with low self-esteem. Look for damaged inventory and work up your skills then upgrade periodically.

Just hit the gym and dress better. Any one that notices is a potential mark.

You can do this
>>
>>729750527
I'm 12 and what is this virgin?
>>
>>729750527
Why haven't you killed yourself? Honestly.
>>
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>>729751579

This is about a month old.
>>
>>729751659
Fake news.
>>
The good thing about this thread is that almost every 4ch can answer op questions
>>
>>729751580
>Not looking like a fucking autist while doing so is the problem.
So much this.. same anon and can 100% relate to that.
I can talk to everybody including women without getting nervous or something as long as it is not about a date or sumthin like that.
>>
>>729751733

Nope. That's really me.
>>
>>729751590
seems actually legit
>>
>>729751386
I could have had my first time around 22.
>out barhopping with group of friends
>as we're walking, female friend starts holding my hand out of the blue
>no idea what's going on, but i roll with it
>she tells me she's feeling horny
>i have no idea how to respond, so i say nothing
>we get to the next bar and never speak of this incident again

The girl you found sounds like more of the exception rather than the rule in the way she handled knowing about your virginity. Also, I'd be terrified of fucking someone I barely know without a condom, even if she claims she has an IUD. Too many men's lives ruined by that sort of thing. Or maybe I just read/watch too much shit online.
>>
>>729751852
then whats your fucking problem?
faceaidscancer?
>>
Best advice: stop being a lazy piece of shit and a loser scumbag. Take care of yourself and become someone you could take pride in. This applies to looks and personality. Ugly people can at least be fit and have other redeeming features. There's no excuse to be a virgin at that age besides yourself. Stop being a bitch
>>
>>729751659
No reason you shouldn't be getting any unless your face is butt. Learn to take good smiling selfies. Copy the behavior of good looking guys who get action.

Get on tinder and swipe right on everything. When you get hits act 50/50 funny and arrogantly cool.

Don't make dates. Just make fuck partners with maybe a single meet up before hand.
>>
>>729751500
It's much more interesting than Andy Sixx's shit, atheist troll girl, and endless reposts of unfunny ylyl memes.
>>
>>729750527
how often do you visit /pol/?
>>
>>729750527
LOSER!!!!
>>
>>729751917
Eh, I was going to kill myself anyway unironically. I tell kids nowadays to wrap their shit up for real.
>>
>>729751960
Looks aren't everything, despite what everyone says. Just like money isn't everything. OP has a well above average body.
I'm >>729750693 and make well above average income. We just have shit personalities.
>>
>>729752240
Wrong!
Seriously do you think a girl who wants just dick gives a fuck about your personality?
There is no need for personality for a fuck.

What you need is a functioning dick and if OP doesnt suffer impotence then i see no problem.
>>
if you're over the age of 17 and haven't gotten laid you're probably gay, if not you will be, your best bet is to kill yourself cause dying from aids sucks, sorry faggot
>>
>>729751963

I'm not buff but I am fit. Not that it would matter.

>>729751979

My face is average. And I can neither act, nor have I a good eye for behaviour.

>>729752131

Never been there.
>>
Just rape.. easy
>>
>>729752416
A girl who wants just dick is going to fuck Chad. Why would she settle for me or OP?
>>
>>729752445
>Still thinks it's okay to get laid in high school
Before you do, read literally anything on the epidemiology of STI in high schools. Lots of guys are getting laid, but only a handful of girls, what does that mean? Sticking your cock in some witches brew of disease infested semen?
>>
>>729752469
You didnt still tell us your problem then.
You can meet them, you look fit, have a dick,..
Where does it go wrong?
>>
>>729752445
I know you're just trolling, but I can guarantee I'm not gay. I jerk it to women almost daily, and men don't do anything for me.
>>
>>729752567
well thats the thing: you have to be the one around

if you are you get laid - would you care about a bitches personality if the only thing you want is pussy?
>>
>>729752606
>tasting another mans dick
Sorry fam, I only fuck virgins
>>
>>729752609

Shit personality. Simple as that. Not funny, not witty, not eloquent. Just a fucking robot.
>>
>>729752700
You're on /b/ im sure you have a trap obsession, seriously though, sex isn't everything dude, whats more important is to find a girl and have babies with her. i guess thats kind of the same thing but people who don't have children are failures
>>
>>729752765
Cant you at least be cynical?
I cant even imagine what you mean.
Never met somebody like that - or i am not aware of it. Would your friends agree with your statement of being robotic?
>>
>>729752469
Sounds like a personality issue
>>
>>729752765
you need to learn how to suck a dick, that will really bring out your personality, even if you're not gay, just try it man, when i sucked my frist dick I became so much more socialised and enegetic
>>
>>729752714
Make sure you come in them too. Mark your territory!
>>
>>729752903

I don't have any friends.

>>729752904

That's what I've been saying.
>>
>>729751659
I'm having a hard time believing your a virgin
>>
>>729752709
A girl who wants no strings sex just needs to go on tinder or whatnot and pick the three most attractive men in her area. Odds are, one will be over to fuck her within the hour. There's no reason to settle for the flawed guy who happens to be at the same bar.
>>
>>729753032
jesus op.. your family?
i dont believe you dont have any friends.
you should work on that first of all if thats true.
>>
Not even your drug dealer is ypur friend ?
>>
>>729752836
Finding someone who wants to spend life together and have babies is even harder than finding someone who just wants to fuck. Why would I be able to do the former if I can't even do the latter?
>>
>>729753097
i am getting the feeling you want a 10/10
like another anon said.. go for the low self esteem grills. or the 6/10s.
>>
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>>729751659
you got a small dick OP, women only like 8" black cock minimum, looks like ur out of luck, also, send pick of someone who looks like you so we can see what ur face looks like
>>
>>729753034

Your imagination is shit in this case.

>>729753188

Don't have that much contact to my family. Visit them maybe twice a year.

>>729753338

Don't do drugs
>>
>>729753437
Maybe u should start then

Bitches love cocain
>>
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>>729753377
omg its this autist again
>>
>>729753358
I tried pretty hard to get with a 3/10 when I was in my early 20s. She humored my advances for a while, but I was just too awkward. She ended up leaving the country.
>>
>>729753354
Duh, find some desperate girl in her 30s (their fertility will be in decline so they'll let anyone put a baby in them). fake a personallity, take some uppers or some 5-HTP suppliments to boost your mood, and shamelessly rip off someone elses personality, like pewdiepie or something, eventually that will become the real you. even if things dont work out you've now both gotten laid and passed on your genetics!
>>
>>729753437
youre giving us a hard time ya know.
you dont give proper answers and information.

tell us why do you dont have any friends and what your family thinks about your social behaviour.

and you can have friends even with shit pers.
>>
>>729753555
>trips checked

thats some long ass time ago if youre OP then.
maybe she just wasnt into you. even if you look lit and its a 1/10 she may just find you not her type o'guy.
>>
>>729753788
>88
hail hitler
>>
>>729753666
Hail satan
>>
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>>729753856
>>
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>>729753891
>>
>>729753666
>tell us why do you dont have any friends

I don't know. Never was able to form any friendships. Most people don't like me.

>and what your family thinks about your social behaviour.

Never talked with them about it.
>>
>>729753967
>Most people don't like me.
Is this an assumption or did they tell you?
If so, what did they say?

>Never talked with them about it.
Thought maybe somebody mentioned something weird.

You really should start with having friends though man.
>>
>>729750527
Why do you lack self confidence, conviction and why are you so anxious and paranoid.
>>
>>729754078
>Is this an assumption or did they tell you?
>If so, what did they say?

They didn't tell me. But I was always excluded from groups in school, university, clubs etc.
>>
>>729753967
>I don't know. Never was able to form any friendships. Most people don't like me.
Everyone probably thinks you're gay, and thats why they dont want to be your friend, maybe stop shoving crayons up your ass and wearing frilly wigs and dresses
>>
>>729754078
How does friendship work once you're 30+? I used to have friends as a kid, but we would just play games and shit. Do adult friends just sit around drinking beer and complain about their lives, or is there something I'm missing?
>>
>>729751051

get a hooker you fucking retard

you have no standards at this point
>>
>>729754374
this, actually a hooker may boost your confidence at this point, worth a shot
>>
>>729754374
I've considered it many times, but I'm worried that would only make me feel worse. I'd just go from a guy who can't get laid to a guy who's so unattractive that women will only fuck for money.
>>
>>729754486
U are a retard op like a whore could make your situation any more worse.
>>
>>729754486
if you can take a hooker, and fuck the shit out of her, like really fucking plow this slut, you will become confident, trust me. Also, have you tried nofap?
>>
>>729754204
Fuck, i feel sorry for you.

I wasnt really a bully in school but we somehow managed to make a girl change schools back then. I still feel terrible for that and if i saw her on the streets today i would run to her and still would apologize. I cant forgive myself for that. Shit is 15yrs ago...

So i really feel sorry about your situation too if you tell it like that.
Not much of help i know, but i would've guessed people get different when they get older.
>>
>>729754340
actually a good question.
but yeah pretty much what you said. if i meet friends outside of a club or event we pretty much just drink beer or smoke some weed and complain or laugh at and over our lifes.
>>
>>729754576

I was never actively bullied. People were simply neutral towards me.
>>
>>729754568
not op but what is it about nofap?
>>
>>729754486

No. Stop pretending to have standards. You're fucking 34. I lost mine when I got bored at a house party when I was 18. Sex isn't some fucking magical profound adventure through each other's bodies and souls like your fucking disney movies make it out to be, you're shoving your meat in a girls' hole. That's it.

If you stand around crying and drivelling at how the world doesn't work around your expectations you're gonna get jack shit out of life and frankly 34 years is a fucking achievement.

Either get laid or fucking dont, its your choice but you have to change.
>>
>>729754730
idk op.
i would really like to help you.
just please make friends. fuck everything else. you need friends, they will catch you if you fall.

you can go to a hooker for pussy.

but its not like nobody would care. i should be playin witcher like for over an hour by now and i am still in this thread.

make something out of it op.
>>
>>729755043

So how do I make friends?
>>
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who likes femdom because they are virgin losers?
>>
>>729750527
How many spells you know?
>>
>>729755142
maybe you can hit up with somebody you knew as a kid or in your youth? or usually from my expirience friendship comes from mutual interest.

so find somebody who likes what youre doin.
gym, drink, whatevs.. that gives you a good basic for conversation
>>
>>729755246
i often watch fems dominating other fems in porn
never enjoyed watching fems dominating men
what does this mean, dr freud?
>>
>>729755504
that youre not into that kind of porn.
>>
>>729755246

I think even the idea of a woman dominating me is retarded

I get my girlfriend to sit on my face frequently but thats because i tell her to
>>
>>729755471
>maybe you can hit up with somebody you knew as a kid or in your youth?

Living at the other end of the country at the moment.

>so find somebody who likes what youre doin.
>gym, drink, whatevs.. that gives you a good basic for conversation

Try to regularly talk to people at the gym. Ask them about exercises and shit like that. Or just regularly greeting them. They answer but they never really reciprocitate.
>>
>>729750527
How has your day been.
>>
>>729755764
I guess its a good thing to talk to people at the gym. Never was at a gym so i dont know how the atmo there is.
But i guess youre doing something else besides the gym.. like working, playin,.. you have neighbours?

I dont know if it would help if youre open about your problems with the people you talk to. I guess depending on the other side it could help. Not because they pity you then but because it could feel reliefing for you to get this out and then it might be less weird for you.
>>
>>729755810

Been working in the morning and then went to the gym. No shitposting and writing job applications.
>>
>>729756066
sounds nice.
>>
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>>729755504
check out pov femdom. in those videos the domme will talk to you and humiliate you.
>>729755693
your submissive then.
>>
>>729756020
I wanted to add that making friends usually means also making firends with their friends and their friends... and sooner or later girls are within that pool too. And having a girlfriend, even platonic, is a good thing.

I always fuck those friendships up because i either sleep with them or try it and then cant look at them anymore. So just dont be so stupid like me.
>>
>>729751009
>Shitposting and violently masturbating.
Are you me?
>>
>>729756020
>But i guess youre doing something else besides the gym.. like working, playin,.. you have neighbours?

How I spend most of my time is by sports (bouldering/climbing, running, cycling), cooking, reading, video games.

I do courses now and then (currently in a yoga course).
>>
>>729756316
Dafuq man you live a more social life than me by far, like real far.
I cant wrap my mind around that you wouldnt have friends then. That sounds like the best prerequesites.

where you from?
and what are you playin?
>>
>>729756181
i've seen some pov femdom videos
doesn't do anything for me
my interest in bdsm is entirely as an outside observer
any fantasy that includes me is much tamer
consensual sex in the missionary position and whatnot
>>
>>729756701
>where you from?

I'm German

>and what are you playin?

Mostly strategy shit like CKII, EUIV etc.
>>
>>729750527
Explain in short why you consider yourself an old kissless virgin?
>>
>>729757044

Because I am old and a kissless virgin?
>>
Story
>37 year old kissless virgin
>Met ho on POF
>Blow it at the last minute
>Said ho starts seeing someone two days later
>Spend 2 fucking years in a friendzone that involved me putting up with way too much shit
>Finally tell her to fuck off last Friday
>Got laid last night for the first time

Kinda feel confused about it, but whatever
>>
>>729756861
>German
Nice

Well you guys know how to make beer at least.
All i can tell you at this point is that even online you can make good friends if they are out of your region.. made good friends with people i was just playin together in the beginning.

gtg
I genuinely wish you all the best anon.
Hope youre doing fine real soon.

Was great to meet you.
Take care.

Hope to not meet you in a thread like this anymore but somewhere else.
>>
>>729757930
he posts this thread at least several times a week, so i'm sure we'll see him here again
>>
Hey OP, I won't ask you anything, sorry.
Have a nice day and godspeed
Thread posts: 123
Thread images: 8


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