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ITT: Ask the opposite gender anything

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Thread replies: 315
Thread images: 33

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GUIDELINES:
Before you post a question, check the FAQ to see if it's already been answered.
Keep questions short for more answers.
If you're not going to like honest answers, don't ask your question.
And please no derailing arguments.

FAQ:
>Do girls/guys like <insert specific look>?
>What do girls/guys think about <an insecurity including, but not limited to: looks, physical traits, personality traits, virginity or otherwise lack of dating experience>
There is no one answer. Preferences differ, but complexes are always a turn-off.

>I'm shy and afraid of people/rejection. What do I do?
Get over it by practising and exposing yourself to it, little by little, step by step. There is no single magical moment that will instantly change you forever.

>I like someone. What do I do?
>How can I tell if someone likes me?
Ask them out.

>Where do I meet girls/guys?
Anywhere outside. Or online.

>Someone did something insignificant. What does it mean?
Nothing significant. You're overthinking it.

>XYZ happened. Interpret this for me please
We're not in their head, we don't know.

>This person did something that hurt my feelings. Why do guys/girls do this?
Because shit people are shit people. It's not a gendered thing.

>Someone has made it super clear they're no longer interested in me. Do I still have a chance?
No.

>Where do I go on a first (or subsequent) date?
Pick one or more of the following: coffee, lunch, dinner, drinks, ice cream, movies, zoo, aquarium, museum, art gallery, <activity in your city>.

>Brandon, that guy who keeps asking about cuddling in platonic friendships, fart guy and the guy who stuffs his pants
Fuck off
>>
guy asking girls. is it weird to want to know my girl's menstrual cycle? do you think she would be disturbed or offended if I asked.
>>
Literally just posted this in the old thread before this one was made.

>>18661438
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>>18661441
No. I think knowing that information usually comes a few months into a relationship. It's completely normal to want to know.
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>>18661446
that's a relief, thanks. I'm new to this if you couldn't guess.
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I started meeting women on OkCupid and the dates have been going well. However I just want to have sex. What do I do at the end of the date? Ask for sex? Usually I just hug goodbye and that's it.
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>>18661441
I want my guy to know approximately when I'll be on my period, or more specifically a week or so before it. I don't want to admit it because I want people to treat women like human beings and not just write off any and all emotions as "Oh you're just PMSing", but I also can't deny that I get fucking crazy a week or so before my period. Not even using that as an excuse to be a bitch because I'm not great at keeping track of when the crazy week is supposed to start. Next thing I know I'm crying over a video of whales eating fish and craving fast food so much it hurts, and oftentimes I don't understand why until my boyfriend asks if I'm currently in the crazy week
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>>18661465
>I want people to treat women like human beings and not just write off any and all emotions as "Oh you're just PMSing"
I guess this is part of the reason I am hesitant. I don't know how it comes off when a woman hears a question like that, really I just want her to know that I care for her body and want to better understand her needs and emotions. thank you for your input
>>
>>18661494
Usually I'm pretty chill if people ask about my period. But if I'm upset at someone and they think I'm being ridiculous and ask if I'm on my period, that'll make me pretty fuckin ornery. It depends on the chick, or even the damn month. Sometimes it's almost like the hormones never happened at all, and sometimes they hit you like a ton of bricks. Just try and be respectful and don't immediately get defensive if she takes it as you writing off her emotions
>>
>>18661441
Idk, depends for what purposes do you want to know?
If I was pretty close to him I probably wouldn't mind, hell he'd probably figure it out on his own if he's living with me. But who knows, some girls don't wanna get into that even with their own mothers. If you have a good relationship at all she should at least not be offended by asking unless you phrase it something like "I wanna know when you're gonna be on the rag so I know when you're gonna be a bitch" or something.
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Query, I'm obsessed with space, science fiction, and fantasy. It is my passion to create new worlds, stories, and adventures. Given that I'm hugely nerdy and tend to avoid what's popular (television, video games, etc.) and prefer a book and some quiet or my notes and writing. I'm not afraid of people or being social. I just want to know how screwed I am at finding somebody when I'm not really interested by society at large, acquiring a high paying job (being stuck behind a desk and computer or doing a lot of manual labor sounds like death to me.), or other "masculine" things (sports, except weightlifting, mechanical work, cars, etc.)
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>>18661462
I'd say bring up the question of what they're looking for, and say you're not really looking for anything serious

>>18661516
I don't think you're screwed at all! I don't know if you'll specifically find someone who's as disinterested with society as you, but you could find someone who's got a combination of society and anti-society if that makes sense. Like I enjoy TV and video games, but I have no interest in the lifestyle a high paying job requires, and I have no interest in being with someone who would have to have that lifestyle. And then I genuinely enjoy going to parties, but they also leave me emotionally drained, and I need my quiet alone time to recharge. My boyfriend isn't into very many masculine things, also not interested in a high paying job, and one of the things I enjoy about our relationship is that we have similar views about the weird, often shallow nature of society. It's like a game people play and get way too wrapped up in, especially considering we're all just going to die and turn into dirt
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I've had a mole about 1.5 inches up the side of my dick since I was born. It's not a hindrance to my daily life but I'm a virgin so I'm not sure if I should get this removed or if it matters at all in bedroom activities
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>>18661554
pics? just upload it to imgur and link it since this is a blue board
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>>18661554
You're probably fine dude. I wouldn't want you to get it removed and have a scar, or have them fuck up and break your wiener
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>>18661550
Glad to see I'm not alone. I've had the worst luck for the last six years when it comes to women.
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>>18661562
How old are you? But I mean no matter the answer, yeah there's a lot of people who like typical things. But every person has at least a few weird interests or qualities that makes them not 100% normal. Nobody's ever a full blown normie, we're all a little weird in our own way. Just some people are weirder than others
>>
>>18661561
>or have them fuck up and break your wiener
If he's american that's probably already happened.
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How sus would it be to wear a watch that's broken and never right but it's a nice looking watch
Like it's a really good looking watch but it thinks a minute has 62.5 seconds
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Reposting
How do I get a non fat, mostly sane, not hideous low hanging fruit gf?
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>>18661640
By being a non-fat, mostly sale, not hideous low hanging fruit guy.
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>>18661648
Bingo.
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To men: if your young female coworker offered you a neck massage because she thought you "looked a little stressed" would you accept?
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>>18661977
Why the hell not. What kind of question is that.
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>>18661977
>Would you like something that was enjoyable and agreed upon by both parties?
Wow, no shit.
Some marriedfags might say no for obvious reasons.
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>>18661977
Absolutely. I'm curious, are you looking to flirt with this guy?
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>>18661979
>>18661999
I just figured a massage would be crossing some sort of line in the work place.

>>18662012
A bit of flirting yeah, but he really does seem stressed. And since he handles a bit of my work I figured I could use this as a way to get to know him more. And not feel so awkward. I'm pretty sure he's married but he doesn't wear a ring or anything.
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>>18661571
26 years old.
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>>18662030
>married but he doesn't wear a ring or anything
Either he's not married or likes to fuck around. Have fun anon.
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>>18662032
Thanks anon
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>>18662030
>>18662032
Lots of married men don't wear rings. Doesn't mean they're not faithful to their wives. Not saying he wouldn't be open to it, but not wearing a ring doesn't mean anything.
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>>18661431
Ladies:

What are the types of things that make you fall head over heels for a guy? What are you looking for in a long-term partner? What makes you fall in love with a man?

I know this is broad as fuck but I'm curious.
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>>18661977
No. There's a nonzero chance of shit getting weird.
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>>18662053
>What are you looking for in a long-term partner?
I can only speak for myself, but here you go:

General Traits
>intelligence
>kindness/empathy
>maturity
>stability
>confidence (not excessive)
>is reasonably healthy
>good work/life balance
>good communicator
>good listener
>is down-to-Earth
>has long-term life goals
>is skilled at something
>laid-back
>gentle
>reflective

Relationship Dynamics
>equals/has neither a to need to "dominate"/"protect" me nor to "submit"/"be protected"
>best friends
>total comfort with each other
>together out of mutual love and appreciation, not dependence, fear, or resignation
>not prone to jealousy or paranoia

Niche Shit
>artistic/appreciates artistic shit
>shares my music taste if music (not identical because that'd be weird, but with significant overlap)
>shares my politics (again with some healthy disagreements)
>rarely or never gets drunk/high
>likes to eat me out
>dark hair, with stubble/beard and glasses (totally optional)

I could write more, but I think this is enough. It's a really, really broad question. I could split hairs and individually describe varying "types" that I'm into, but that'd require way more time, thought, and energy than I'm willing to invest.

And yes, I'm fully aware a person this perfect doesn't exist.
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>>18662174
literally me tbqh bby
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>>18662174
Almost me but I have a prescription for medical cannabis.
Also, define mature. It's such a nebulous term.
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hey guys/girls,
How does a bloke who looks younger attract more females? I feel as if my younger appearance is a general hinder on my dating life.

>Be 21
>Work for states police and fire IT
>Have lots of ambition
>Love outdoors and sinking piss
>Also love music and art (i.e. sculpting, making things)
>Generally outgoing personality
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>>18661977
Hell yeah, I would.
I had a coworker who was talking about how stiff her shoulders where and how she's gonna go home to her sis for a massage. I hoped the conversation would somehow lead to one of us giving the other a massage, but that never happened. Broke my heart.
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>>18661441
Not weird to me. Sure if you want to know because you have weird hang ups around periods then that isn't great in itself, but knowing is normal enough to me.
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>>18661462
Preferably get a little drunk together, flirt with her, makes sure that she knows beforehand that you're not set on a serious relationship. Then steer towards kissing at the end of the night, preferably before dropping her off.
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>>18661554
Unless it's huge and bulging etc I wouldn't bother. Bodies are weird. It's not something that I would care about in the least.
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>>18662053
I used to get all up into what kind of person I wanted to marry some day, but I lost interest because my experience so far is that I find a lot of different traits (appearance, personality..) attractive.

For a relationship that has potential to work out, though, I'm looking for several things pre-dominantly.
>great conversational partner
I LOVE to talk and for me, recapping together on your experiences, discussing the news, comparing stances on a story a mutual friend told us and so on is a very important way to keep feeling connected and also like you keep being able to challenge and surprise each other. So I need to be with someone who feels similarly and is expressive.
>good communication skills for problem solving
Doesn't really need much explanation, I want to be able to trust that if my partner is offended/hurt by something I did or vice versa, we can still hear each other out, still give each other the benefit of the doubt, and most importantly that he is more focused on wanting to understand each other and come to some agreement than wanting to hurt me because he's angry. Also no hot tempered people. Grew up with a father who made my entire childhood about his grievances and emotional swings - never again.
>on the same page in terms of marriage, children, how we want to raise the children
Including marriage being more a token of dedication than of love primarily, and choosing to want to spend life together with the understanding that this might not be what you get excited about every single day.
>desire to build each other up
Obviously you should be able to call each other out on shit, but I see way too many couples that rag on each other in a way that is patronizing or just soul crunching. To me when you end up in a serious relationship, it is your duty to do all you can to appreciate their good points and forgive their flaws, within what's reasonable of course.
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>>18662369
These are the most important factors that would make me consider that the relationship has marriage potential. There's a lot of bonus factors (like having hobbies in common, him coming from a great family and him being both physically and verbally affectionate, and at least somewhat of a switch sexually, are deal breakers as well.
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>>18662053
>Genuine
Doesn't try to impress me, doesn't play games. Honest, upfront.
>Stable
Mentally healthy, going towards some goal in live, somewhat healthy physically.
>Relaxed
Down to earth, reserved, laid back.
>Communicative
>Fun to be around
Intelligent, curious, shares some of my interest, witty, passionate during discussion, able to justify his opinions.
I like people who are a little inflammatory, who have unconventional/strong opinions.
>Kind
Empathetic, generous, loving, attentive.

I'd date >>18662174 guy too.
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What does it mean when you actively try to spend time with a guy and flirt with him but whenever another specific guy comes around you ditch the first for the other. Cause this if fucking me up and I just want to know if i should just stop trying with this girl
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>>18662385
means it's time to ditch her and not get involved.
If you start ignoring her, she may even start fighting for your attention. I would forget about her altogether though
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>>18662308
>attract
By asking various girls on dates. Duh!

>>18662385
It means you are her backup boy or worse beta orbiter.
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Women: I have been seen as a creep/possible rapist since first day of college. What would make you think of somebody as a rapist/creep at first contact?
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>>18662482
This is a very serious label and not something that I would say about any guy as long as he did not outright assault people. Calling someone a rapist is imo entirely unacceptable.

Having said that in my experience the "creep" label most often is the result of a contrast between being obviously highly interested in women and sex, and being unable to take a casual attitude towards that own interest and just chat with them as fellow people - because of insecurity, lack of social skills, you name it.
Quick example. Sometimes when a guy looks at my body and I catch him, he'll offer a (cocky or apologetic) smile, an embarrassed look, a sheepish grin, a provocative stare, you name it. It is in that second interaction, that even if he behaves in a way I do not find pleasant (like giving me an extremely suggestive face) that he acknowledges that I am a person, and not a non-playing character, who perceives his actions in a certain way, has opinions on them, and so on.
It also happens that the man looks away the moment I look him in the face after seeing him look down. As far as I'm aware this is often a sign of a lot of respect for women and/or high personal standards: the guy is so embarrassed that he got caught sneaking a glance, that he cannot meet my gaze. However, it feels a lot more dehumanizing to have someone instantly look away. It makes you feel much more like a walking set of tits, like you're just another billboard (even if you're covered up, it does not matter, someone will look) and they see you as eye candy and not as an actual person. So the moment you want to have a human to human interaction, they reject that connection and disregard you altogether.

This is just one example of how tense behavior and horny behavior can pair off very badly. Never forget that other people can't read your thoughts. Just like shy people will oftentimes get mistaken for aloof, arrogant etc.
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>>18662496
The post was too long but my conclusion is essentially that it is behaving like you are only interested in polite, formal exchanges etc, while meanwhile it is obvious that you are sexually interested in people, can come across as insincere or downright creepy. It is the extreme difference between the message and the tone that rubs the wrong way.

Maybe this does not apply to you at all. But in my experience some variation of this is most often why guys get called creeps - excluding any legitimate reasons.
>>
>>18662496
I have never assaulted anyone. I even tried my best to have conversations with random people, including women, but when I speak with women they get visibly uncomfortable out of no known reason, ending up keeping as much distance as possible. Even if I say a simple hello.

On you second point you might have something there. I don't think of women as something other than human beings. i
Instead, if I catch somebody looking at me, whether it is a man or woman, I end up looking back while keeping eye contact till they look away. It has come as a habit of random people staring on the street, in which some of them even tried to seem dangerous.
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>>18662517
Could it be that someone spread rumors about you to begin with? That girls are wary of you because they heard that you are apparently a skeevy dude?
I also don't know how random you're talking about - it is in itself not that weird for women to keep more distance from a male stranger, in case he wants to ask them out (to be on the safe side and not feel like you led him on or encouraged him). But random people at university =/= random people at the bus stop.

I did not mean to imply that men who act this way themselves think of women as very different. Just that the amount of care they put into how they treat women, and/or the lack of intuition and experience with how to do it, can make it feel that they think you are some sort of alien while on the receiving end. I feel like a lot of people underestimate just how much their real intentions and convictions do not necessarily shine through very clearly. Hence the example of shy people who often get mistaken for feeling above talking to others, which is far from the truth. And those shy people tend to not realize that their discomfort doesn't show as prominently as they experience it.
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>>18662531
Could be rumors, but I could also think that my face might have something to do with it. As an example, I am unable to smile. I also have a severe case of resting bitch face.

All women at college get visibly uncomfortable when I try and start a conversation with them.
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>>18662531
Forgot to add. I am not exactly shy, but instead I try to keep distance sometimes, which might give the wrong impression as you said, just so I don't end up in prison. I don't have any trust in the police. I am pretty sure that this is something a lot of men has to think about when approaching women nowadays. Not saying that women will automatically accuse men of rape, but if they wanted to then they can without any consequences or the need of any evidence.
>>
>>18662591
you should've mentoin it at the very begining. Yes, that's most likely the reason.
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>>18662620
So what should I do? There doesn't seem to be a solution for my problem.
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>>18662599
Take a moment to read this. Yes it sets out to put false rape claims into perspective, but it's packaged with legitimate sources. No this is not something that many men worry about going about their life.

https://qz.com/980766/the-truth-about-false-rape-accusations/
>>
>>18662632
It is defenitely a good read, but I think it might take a bit for me to ever really start trusting people to any extent.
>>
>>18662628
is it a genetical deformation then?
you *physically* cannot smile at all?

if you can't help it via training, there are also operations and just sincere conversations - "hi, sorry about the face. If I could, I'd smile at you". It's not the best thing one can hear, but definitely not the worst either.
>>
Either or could answer

Should I confront the dude that threatened me and isn't my friend anymore over riding front seat on the way back of a trip where he had front on the way?Basically two years ago exactly on vacation in Florida my family and another family who's close friends went. The daughter is my sisters best friend..

But he weirded her out by sending unsolicited dick pics... this embarrassed me but I always put up with his flaws and didn't make a big deal of it.

This past Friday he made the biggest deal and was the biggest cut about me calling shotgun on the way back from a trip in which he had called shotgun over fb and I let him have it on the way.... so some res petty shit and I let the big stuff slide...

Should I be like I know what you did and was too nice and accepting of your major flaws to call you out on it? Like seriously I wanna be like you're a weird ass dude and since I was your friend I put up with it but in retrospect should have cut you off then. I just want him to know he's a fucked up dude.
>>
>>18662677
what
i understand nothing from this post
>>
>>18662677
I see no reason not to, but I read your post yesterday and should warn you that the chance that he will actually take it to heart is really small. Most people are pros at rationalizing threats to their ego, so chances are he goes "oh, anon is just pissed because of the seat and now he's trying to make me look bad despite never caring about this stuff earlier".

Having said that, him seeing the light isn't the only reason to tell him that he's a dick, it can also be for personal satisfaction and that you made it heard WHY you don't want to be friends with him anymore.

Basically in your position I would. Just make sure to keep it as neutral and respectful as possible and not throw a fit that can be used against you to mutual friends. And realize that it'll likely roll off him like water off a duck.
>>
>>18662666
I think it might be some kind of genetic defect as I cannot move down my lower lip in the same way that others can. I think there might be something with a muscle or two. Might need to visit a doctor just to be sure. The result is that I end up looking like a monster when I try to smile.
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>>18662683
Good idea. If it doesn't roll off after a whole I'll legit tell him over text that he's always been shitty and I put up with it. And I'll let him know of how he embarrassed me in front of two families by sending nudes to a girl who didn't like him at all. I agree I should let it blow over but even then if he apologizes I'm not gonna value him as a close friend anymore. Whenever I argue fairness he starts calling me names and gets douchey and I don't need that given how nice I am...
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>>18662681
Basically a guy who is supposed to be close friends made a huge stink over me calling shotgun. My driver friend told him to stop and that he's not entitled but the guy was still mad at me thinking I'm trying to prove something or some shit... wouldn't let it go when it should have been defused in an instant....


And I'm
Debating letting him know I know about some boosie shit he did on a vacation I brought him on and that I prob should I've cut him off over that and some other things before he cut me off over some lame shit
>>
Girls

Why do nice guys finish last?
>>
>>18662703
They only do if you're talking about the kind of guys who thing that bombarding a woman with niceties and respect will magically make her attracted to him. The kind of nice guys who happen to be reliable, good men looking for a healthy relationship, but who also dare to not treat a woman like she's made out of glass and let her know they find her hot and want her, who have self respect and don't allow themselves to be used as a doormat, those are forever the most desired men.

The fact that an asshole who shows his sexuality and obnoxious personality gets more interest than a forgettable guy who doesn't show anything of who he is and just treats women as he think he should, doesn't mean that women don't want to date pleasant men. They would just rather have an unpleasant man than a spineless lapdog.
>>
>>18662703
Good quest
Girls just want a chad that they feel they need to be perfect for. It's like a challenge perhaps to try and get with the hottest and most alpha guy. There's confidence and then there is arrogance. Nice guys typically are shy and more reserved and VERY RESPECTFUL. It's never a nice guy pretending to be cocky to get girls... but the arrogant guys who aren't so nice can appear as confident or and girls in my experience go for guys who seem like they could care less if they have them as a gf... i just think girls are attracted to the dominant side of things by nature, even if the guy is a first rate asshole that's obnoxious.

But part of me wants to believe that nice guy's sometimes have a chance by meeting a more refined and down to earth girl who doesn't care about showing off a chad bf to fake friends or social media and would actually like real conversations and being treated well...

A lot of nice guys can appear as pushovers and girls mostly find that a sign of weakness and the opposite of what they are after
>>
>>18662703
Why would you want a girl that lusts after an asshole anyways though? Sounds like the kind of person I wouldn't want to associate with.
>>
>>18662722

>typically are shy and more reserved and VERY RESPECTFUL

Yeah that's definitely me. I've been assertive enough before to tell this 1 girl what I was feeling. So I directly told her that I liked her. Her response? she told me she wasn't looking for anything at the time but when she could tell my dissapointment she said "anon, you are a great guy. You're very funny and you look good! You'll find great girl soon I'm sure of this ;)" and guess what... less than 3 weeks later that same girl started dating a chad.

Fucking bullshit
>>
Why would anyone want to date me if there's always someone better?
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>>18662746
Yeah that's real shitty I'm a 24 year old nice guy but I've never even been told I look good by a girl. I've always been rejected when I asked girls out and don't even bother with tinder anymore since no matches are to be had... it's not easy at all to not feel bad about the rejection and loneliness and frustration. I feel it every day but I keep hearing that if I keep feeling down on myself I'll never find anyone. But it's puzzling to even brush it off and not fee some type of way...

I hope you make it, anon! I'm sure we both will some day
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>>18662758

I've had several attractive girls tell me I'm good looking and "handsome". I'm starting to think they are lying to me tho.

It's whatever at this point. I'm almost to the age where I'll be losing either way.
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>>18662766
Damn bro same it gets harder when you're older I'm sure
>>
>>18662687
you smile with your eyes, man.
Lips have nothing to do with it.
>>
>>18662766
I would rather be single forever than date an ugly girl.
>>
>>18662756
Why would you want to date anyone if there's always someone better?
>>
>>18662777
Same... and I'm not even that picky. I just need the slightest attraction physically


What really sucks is even on here when I ask girls for appearance advice, they just ignore me or tell me I'm not their type. I used to think I looked good and capable but ffs everything tells me I'm not.
>>
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>Girls
Would you date a guy with Asperger syndrome?
>>
>>18662777

Oh I much rather be single than date an ugly girl or be a step dad
>>
So I've been seeing this girl for 2 months now and everything has been going okay we've had sex and done lots of things together. But we're not officially in a relationship or anything. She's about to make a special dinner for me and take me out today. She has yet to ask me about becoming official but I feel like with all she's done for me and with today I should be the one to make it official. Thoughts?
>>
Does it ever pay off to be insistent and persistent with a girl who doesn't seem to want to be in a relationship with you yet?
>>
>>18662792
Yeah
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>>18662813
Does it ever? Yes. Does it happen a lot? No. And it comes at a price of undermining your self respect (to constantly invest in someone who does not return your feelings) and potentially being seen as pushy and disrespectful by others. Besides if a girl literally relents because you insist, that doesn't really give any relationship a promising start.
>>
>>18661431
Girls:
What would you think of a pale guy who lives in a Mediterranean country (ergo all other guys have a darken skin tone).

>inb4 Do girls/guys like <insert specific look>?
>>
>>18662766
Overall Body>face so i'd probably choose to date an ugly girl.
>>
>>18662882

Wtf

Being single is better than dating an ugly or becoming a step dad
>>
>>18662886
Like I said, face doesn't really matter to me that much. Weight maybe, but even a plain girl can look beautiful in a certain lighting. Also, i'd probably care more about personality in a long-term relationship.
>>
>>18662886

>I have an opinion
>therefore everyone has this opinion
>>
>>18662901

But what about when they start to degrade in a few years?
>>
>>18662911
Well i'll probably be degraded too. Of course i'll try to stay in shape and I expect they will too, as that's what i'm looking for in a partner, but you can't stop people aging.
>>
I was outside a bar having a cigarette when a girl came up to me and asked me for a lighter. Instead of going back over to her friends, she decided to hang around and strike up a conversation with me. Nothing particularly overly flirty was said or done (apart from a touch on the arm), we were just making small talk and asking each other a few things,. But it was mostly her who was keeping the conversation going, as I was being pretty shy like I usually am. But she only decided to go back to her friends when she said she owed one of them half of her cigarette and seemed really keen to get the conversation going as much as she could. As I left to go back inside, she stopped me to ask me my name.

What was going on here? Keep in mind that I'm not the best looking of guys, and rarely attract women, but I just happened to be dressed a little smarter. Meanwhile she was at least an 8/10. Did she have the beer goggles on, or was she just simply being friendly?
>>
>>18662775
My eyes also got problems. One of them is visibly more closed than the other.
>>
>>18662952

>I was outside a bar having a cigarette when a girl came up to me..

Lmao really? One of my friends literally had that EXACT same experience. The entire paragraph. Including asking for a light, and trying to talk to him while he was being shy and playing on his phone. And guess what, they are now engaged and living together.
>>
>>18662960
does not make it impossible to smile
>>
>>18662792
I have a friend with Asperger's and he does pretty damn well
>>
>>18662968
Well we didn't swap numbers lol.

Did they get together that night or did they run into each other at a later date?
>>
>>18662977

they didn't get together that night. Infact I don't think he even got her number that night. I thinking he ran into her on campus since she went to his Uni and exchanged numbers
>>
I am quite a mature person character wise. People have said this for many years now and I have always been a person for advice for my whole circle of friends and family. Now I am 24 and I didn't push my life yet but I want to change. Didn't have a girlfriend so far but trying to become better. I found a girl I like and I think she likes me. Thing is she is 29 and already very successful in her career. I am not intimidated or anything but for one I don't know if my age is a problem (usually it's the other way around) and also I am still a kissless Virgin and afraid if something happens that this will put her off if I tell.
>>
>>18662994

Since she's several years older than you, she's probably much more likely to be understanding.

At least you're not me. I'm 27 with less than minimal experience. So I'm sort of fucked when it comes to girls
>>
>>18662984
Was it him who approached her the second time, and how long after they first met did they encounter each other?
>>
>>18662999
Thanks dude. I hope so too. I would like some girl to give her thoughts as well if possible.
>>
>>18663002

I think he did the second time. I don't know how long after, but I don't think it was very long. I think within a few days
>>
>>18662766
>Single forever
>implying this is a bad thing how shit most women are now
Alos there's plenty of 3rd world pussy
>>
>>18663022

>3rd world pussy

True. These people are doing that >>>/int/78750931
>>
>>18662792
Maybe. My best friend of 12 years has it and you'd hardly know it without following his private social media accounts. If you can be about as functional as he is, I'd absolutely consider dating.
>>
>>18663082
>>18662976
>>18662819
Good to know, What if the guy have OCD as well?
>>
>>18663137
Best friend has also literally been diagnosed with OCD, as have I; his mild, mine mild to moderate. It's only a deal-breaker if it's severe. Good luck out there.
>>
Girls, hoe, slut or harlot, which do you prefer?
>>
>>18663163
For what? I'm not into name calling sexually if that's what you mean. But if that was your angle then I'm pretty sure that slut is most popular.

If you are just talking about words then harlot, I guess.
>>
>>18663163

Out of those, harlot. My bf calls me wench on occasion, so I might be biased towards more retro names, though.
>>
>>18663163
Hussy
>>
Girls:
1. What's your favorite cuddle position?
2. If your BF suggested sensual intimate full body massage with no sex would you be offended?
>>
>>18663183
It's a tie between being cuddled up to his chest while "on top" (him lying down me hovering over or lying on him) and straddling the guy. I prefer the first for just all around lazy Sunday morning cuddling (spooning is great too but more numb limbs and no natural eye contact) and the second is a personal weak spot especially for cuddling you hope to turn into foreplay.

I would not be offended but would only do it if he really personally wanted to. I do not enjoy being massaged at all so it would be for him, personally. I know many women who love it though.
>>
Girls:

Do any of you guys get off on the idea of being knocked up or bred? Particularly if you get creampied? I find the idea pretty hot, and it's definitely one of the overtones of bareback sex for me, but I feel like that's a weird one to bring up. Is there a way to broach the topic of that without it being weird?
>>
>>18663183

1. All cuddles are good, it's impossible to pick a favourite. Anything with max. body contact and warmth is perfect.
2. Why'd that be offending? But I'm not big on massages, so I'd be fine giving one, but not recieving one.
>>
>>18663197
They definitely exist. I personally find the idea pretty hot but would only enjoy it if I felt 100% secure in my birth control. Even then I would never want an abortion so the guy mentioning a potential child might just make me stressed and take me out of the moment, that's impossible to say beforehand. The idea is exciting though.

More than any of this I am really into pregnancy (sex), though. The concept that is as I've never experienced it, but it's a serious enough thing for me that I would absolutely question any man I might marry on how he feels about pregnant women. Not like I have endless chances to make this fantasy come true.

If you want to be on the safe side tell it during pillow talk and stress that the idea gets you off (not that you want it to happen). It's arguably the most normal kink there is so even if she's not into being reminded during sex I think few would rule this weird. Reflect beforehand on how you would try to explain it (like marking her as yours, doing something definite that cannot be undone, fulfilling the biological imperative, a full surrender to nature and your animalistic urges, whatever does it) to someone who doesn't naturally see the appeal.
>>
>>18662971
I would still not call it a smile as I always end up looking like Jabba the Hut on meth. I have seen pictures of myself "smiling" and I would not perceive it as one if I was in somebody else's shoes.
>>
>>18663208
High five, I have the same problem. I can't smile.
I fucking hate it when people say shit like "just smile" "all you have to do is smile" "start the day with a smile". That's something normiefucks can do but not me.
>>
Girls: Would you ever tattoo a guy's name on your face if you truly love him? (assuming he would do it too, if that's required)
>>
>>18663220
Absolutely never. I cannot think of anything more trashy. Hell no tattoos, period.
>>
I'm starting to feel good. A friend told me I looked handsome today. She's never said that before, no girl has, and it feels good.
>>
>>18662756
Can you cook? Checkmate!

>>18662804
Keep dating and dicking her hard. Asking the question "what are we?" is her job. If you feel like gentelman, bring her flowers or somethibg else she likes. Until she brings the subject, do NOT talk about love and related subjects.

>>18662813
Cant recommend.

>>18662876
Try badoo.

>>18662952
Is this second or third times you are asking this? (She wanted your D)

>>18662994
She will want a baby in less than a year. Are you sure you want that? Talk about babies with her asap. Otherwise it doesnt matter. And are you sure you cant date somebody younger?

>>18663226
Instead of listening to bullshit, go and ask some girls on dates.
>>
>>18663239
What makes you think I don't ask girls out on dates lol, I'm just happy I got called handsome
>>
Every time i decide to go out and talk to girls and see one that i find attractive i suddenly stop and say to myself why bother going up to her and waste time on something that could potentialy go nowhere when i can just go watch porn and fap instead, is this because i fap alot?
>>
Girls:

Would you date a complete waste of space, piece of shit, obese, 20 year old male with no aspirations, dreams, or future?
>>
>>18663251

No, it's because you're a coward. Anything outside your comfortzone frightens you, so you just go right back to the things you're comfortable with.
>>
>>18663251
Could be, but there's multiple options. Eg if you are very scared of rejection then this could be your rationalization for why it's legitimate not to try. Or the other way around - you just sincerely don't desire a (sexual) relationship that much.

Either way, for what it's worth, approaching people and making small talk is in itself practice which improves your social and approaching skills, and having a sexual relationship is about more than getting off (better). It is just another and more intimate dynamic to have with another person, if you are dating someone you actually like it's like an intense and personal friendship.
>>
>>18663251
Idk, I think it's a comfort zone thing combined with low self esteem. When you go out and want to talk to girls, I think you should make sure you are dressed in a way that you feel attractive and also that you don't care about the outcome too much and just feel like it's a fun/relaxed thing to do.
I'm not succesful with girls but I managed to stop being shy this way. Also remind yourself that if you are the one that speaks you are already "better" than a shy guy in that sense. And if the other person doesn't respond nicely then they are the idiot shy one.
I agree with the other anon, it's a thing that takes practice. If you see someone, guy or girl, with a t-shirt of a band you like, you can try complimenting them about it and asking them about music or making small talk about it, to practice being more relaxed around strangers.
>>
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>>18663249
Because every time any girl agrees to go on date with you, she basically told you that you are handsome enough to date / fuck / marry you. So telling you it using words is kinda pointless.

>>18663251
Try drinking alcohol a bit. And yes. Try no fap no porn for 14 days. Maybe then you will find some desire to have sex.

>>18663255
Wouldnt it be easier to improve yourself instead of shitposting?
>>>/fit/ sticky and
https://www.mcdonalds.com/us/en-us/careers.html
>>
I am a guy and I was wondering how women imagine their ideal first date with people they got to know from an online dating site.
>>
>>18663263
Should girls accept me for who I am? Seems kind of sexist that I'd need to improve myself to meet their standards.
>>
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Ladies, can you dance like this?
Gentlemen, does your wife material gf have to dance like this?
>>
>>18663269
In a public place, not a high pressure date (no fancy stuff, just drinks or, preferably, coffee). Everything I find important has to do with how the guy behaves (e.g. do I actually get an impression of who he is, does he listen and ask good questions, does he show humor, do we have things in common, is there chemistry, does he keep his phone in his pants, you name it) and not with anything to do with the date idea itself. There's time enough to plan dashing stuff when it's clear that you like each other a lot, I feel it's a bit much for a first introduction and seeing if you even get along.
>>
>>18663275
It doesn't run for me but no doubt I can't, I'm a crappy dancer. Would like to learn it some day because it seems lots of fun if you actually get into it and don't feel self-conscious.

>>18663272
In terms of base respect, absolutely. But accepting someone and wanting to date you are different things. You are probably dreaming of having a svelte girl yourself and not your female equivalent.
>>
>>18663272
Depends on what kind of girls you want to date. If you would be willing to date anyone who has your same problems and maybe other problems too then you are fine I guess. Although there's that theory that women aim higher and men aim lower, not sure how much it applies.
>>
>>18663275
of course not, that looks like shit
>>
>>18663276
So, keeping it plain or maybe ordinary is preferableon a first date.

What locations would you suggest?
I guess somewhere where you get not distracted too much from your conversation partner.
>>
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>>18663272
Nobody is entitled for love or companionship. Your only right is to die alone. I bet you wouldnt date female version of yourself either.

And now go to /fit and start the unfattening process asap. Recommended speed is 1kg per week you fat fuck!
>>
>>18663286
1kg per week is pretty aggressive, isn't it? That's nearly a 8,000 calorie deficit per week. If my TDEE is 2000 calories, that'd be like 800 calories per day. Enough to survive, but probably not healthy.
>>
>>18663275
>Gentlemen, does your wife material gf have to dance like this?
No, twerking is degenerate. I'd rather we waltzed or slow danced.
>>
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>>18663298
500 kcal deficit daily + low or high intensity cardio. And it depends on how super fat you are. At start your body can shred fat like nothing and then it will slow down when you will getting closer to healthy weight. Also not all of it will be your fat, more then often it is water as well.

>healthy
With lowering your weight your life expectancy will rise so much (and chances of various funny diseases go down rapidly) that no doctor will object.
>>
How important is it for a guy to be able to dance right? I also can't jump the rope, I never thought I'd be required to as an adult. Is this a red flag?
>>
>>18663309
First find a girl. Then if it will get serious, you can easily go together to lectures of dance as dating process.

If you are well rounded husband material, no girl will ever ditch you because lack of dancing skills.

>just dont try to court club whores because that is probably the only place where refuse for dancing looks weird.

>>18663278
>I can't
Confirmed for never been drunken and simply enjoying herself on party.
>>
>>18663309
being able to dance is a sign of confidence, not giving a shit about what others think and feeling at home in your own body. all definitely good things. but you can be all those and still dance like a freak, so it's not necessary.
as for the rope jumping, idk, how can you not be able to do that? that's really weird and you might actually have a body coordination issue. maybe let a doc check on that. it might be related to you dancing like a retard...
>>
Can loving yourself too much be a turn off? I love myself in a playful way but a girl recently told me I am too in love with myself.

I see it better than how I use to be, I use be a self loathing and self pitying faggot.
>>
>>18663255
Hey I just got rejected by a girl for a complete loser.
So anything is possible.
>>
>>18663330
>I love myself in a playful way
Is this euphemism for masturbation???
>>
>>18663255
of course not
>>
Girls, if you aren't dumb, why is it more difficult to teach something to an old lady than to an old man?
>>
>>18663346
No, for example.
A girl and myself often joke about how we are going to get married etc.
So we were joking about our kids and I said they would be fine as long as they get my great looks and brains.
>>
Is it sexy for girls to watch men doing manual labor or using their hands in general?
>>
>>18663352
cite your sources for this claim.
>inb4 I tried it with two of my grandparents
>>
>>18663353
it's not loving yourself.
it's saying your gf is a dumb piece of an ugly shit. Pretty egoistic, indeed
>>
>>18662876
Just get a tan. Now is the right season.
>>
>>18663375
She is just my friend and I said it in a teasing manner.
>>
>>18663387
that's reasonably ok then
>>
Don't want to start a new thread for this:

Me and a friend (both guys) met a girl at the gym. She was disrespectful towards me from the start, before I even really said anything. First I was like "really?", then I basically told her to treat me respectfully or I'll just ignore her (because who the hell needs people like this). Later I started ignoring her and did my own thing because she didn't stop, and she and my friend just went on talking.
Two days later she wants to add me on facebook (but not my friend) despite knowing only my first name and what I study, which means she must have actively searched for me (must've taken some time).

Can someone explain?
>>
>>18663408
She is a tsundere obviously
>>
>>18663408
Give her the dick my boi.
>>
>>18663213
Yeah, I have received the same comments from people. I don't see how a person is supposed to smile just like that. It is just like when people comment on your silence, e.g "you don't talk much, do you". How am I even supposed to answer to that question?
>>
>>18663408
Certain people show affection in this way. Ask her on date.
>>
>>18663434
it's fake it till you make it kind of problem.
You train and bite through untill you learn how to do it and it comes with ease for you.
Ask a friend for help. Mother if a friend is unavailable.
>>
So I'm a 20 year old virgin, just put a condom on for the first time. It was a regular sized durex invisible, I pretty much filled it out.

That big enough?
>>
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>>18661431
Ladies

No beard
Slight beard
Full beard
>>
>>18663451

Yes. It should be snug.
>>
>>18663451
you should get a pussy before worrying if you are big enough
>>
>>18663408
give exemples of disrespectful behaviour
>>
>>18663466
I have to figure myself out first, knowing I'm not small is a nice thought though.
>>
>>18662876
as a pale guy in italy, it pretty much sucks
apparently the only thing most girls have to tell me is how pale i am
it's annoying but it's actually good, helps me to cancel them from the list, dont need some rude tan focused bitch in my life
>>
>>18663453
Slight beard.

>>18663479
I ragazzi pallidi sono oggettivamente i più belli.
>>
>>18663494
>oggettivamente
è chiaro che no
se sei un chad va bene che tu sia pallido o abbronzato
ma se sei normale o bruttino IN MEDIA piaci meno se ti mimetizzi con le lenzuola
>>
>>18663471
Something like "you look like a total nerd xD" (in a negative way) and stuff. No plain insults, but kinda insulting anyway.

>>18663437
>>18663419
>>18663413
I thought something like that, too.

While I'm at it, here's another one:
I asked a girl out whom I've known for some time now (but always just friends), she said no (only wants to be friends) and it wasn't a big deal for me. I didn't act differently towards her after that and didn't treat her differently. Everything was normal for a few weeks and now she began to act very disrespectfully towards me, too. The only thing that changed was that I feel I became a lot more confident in general, but I have no idea if she (or everyone else) even noticed that.
If she felt like I was still trying to get her, she could just ignore me (but doesn't)?

Could it be the same thing?
>>
>>18663370
Kind of?
My boyfriend has been renewing our furniture lately and I find it extra hot.
>>
>>18663498
refuse her friend request and keep ignoring her
tsundere my ass, learn to behave you stupid bitch
>>
>>18663497
Io sono una fan.
I ragazzi pallidi o comunque chiari di carnagione sembrano sempre un po' più eleganti e meno coatti.
>>
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Should I tell her I have feelings for her? It would fuck up our friendship - I spend a lot of time with her and another male friend, camping and doing karaoke and shit like that, and I value that dynamic a lot. But at the same time I've gotten attached to her to the point that I can't focus on other women, and there's usually one day a week where the tension reaches an unbearable degree and I make posts asking for advice on Rwandan potato farming imageboards.
The thing is that I have no idea if she knows that I'm into her, but I don't think it's reciprocated and I don't know how much of a point there would be to telling her except for my own mental health - which probably wouldn't be improved by disintegrating our little group.
So I'm trying to figure out if she would appreciate the honesty, or if I should do it regardless of her feelings, or what - I'm broadly and generally confused.
>>
>>18663510
ne conosco alcune che ragionano così, grazie di esistere
per la maggioranza però ricevo solo insulti, certo non hanno molto altro da dire quindi posso capire che insistano
mi piacerebbe sapere dove si nascondono le ragazze con un po' di tatto
>>
How do I handle or get over feeling guilty for insecure guys?

I've attracted a lot of insecure/shy/introverted guys over the years and I never know how to deal with them and reject them. I try to be as nice as possible, because I am actually really proud they would step out of their comfort zone like that and take the chance, but I always feel so guilty because I know they take it hard/personally.

I've tried being blunt with them, and they either get really down about it or worse REEE at me.
I've tried letting them down subtly/ghosting them hoping "well maybe if they see me as a bitch anyway they won't feel so dejected and realize they deserve better or something" but I feel like that's the wrong approach too.
>>
>>18663524
Either jump and risk burning in the skies or never do anything and the ethernal pain and regrets are certain.

Dont talk about love. Simple ask her on date. Buy her flowers and use word DATE. She will then reject you, crush your heart and after a while you will be able to move on with your life.

Do not use words like relationship, love, oenitis or crush. I repeat, do not talk about love. Simple flower gesto will do the talking for you. Ask her on date and either recieve gf or quick death. Both results are better than suffering for ethernity.
>but you know what you should do, you just lack courage to do it, dont you?

>>18663586
You dont. Even though the clean cut hurts a lot, it is the most humane thing to do. When you have to kill pig to obtain bacon, what do you think is better? Torture it for weeks or fast death out of nowhere?

>there isnt worse fate that being friendzoned imho, just look at the poster above
>>
>>18663586
Their insecurity isn't your problem. It's not your job to coddle them and you don't owe them anything. Be blunt, but not impolite. If they REEEE, feel free to act like a bitch. It's what they deserve.
>>
>>18663524
Yes.
It probably won't go well though but I would advise you to tell her how you feel.
I did it recently and got rejected but I feel better now because I can move on, it can be hard looking at her but at least she gave me direct answer.
Go for it, it will either end up good or alright depending on your react.
You can be a shallow faggot and get mad at her or shrug off the rejection and be a good friend or maybe, just maybe she might like you back and say yes.

Ask her on a date and make you it is not a friend date.
>>
>>18663595
Yeah I know that deep down, but I still feel bad. Like I'm the reason they gave up on love or something.

Thankfully I've only had a couple guys make a scene, unfortunately one of them was while I was working so I was pretty powerless to retaliate. "The customer is always right" after all. The other one I just walked away from. So long as he didn't physically do anything to me like grab my arm I was just gonna remove myself from the situation without causing an even larger scene. It was embarrassing because the whole food court went quiet and stared but at least that was it. I at least feel a little bad when they do crap like that, but still. I'm partially concerned for what would happen if someone did grab me or something when I tried to walk away, but I assume there would be at least one good person in the area to draw a line and help me if it got physical like that.
>>18663594
Thats the worst part sometimes, is when I don't even wanna be friends with the guy because I know his intention isn't to be my friend, just lie and wait for me to change my mind, or try to change it for me
How do you say "I don't even want to be friends" without looking like the bad guy? lol.
>>
>>18663621
whoops *I at least feel a little better when they do crap like that
>>
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>>18663621
Can i ask you how are you attracting boys? You see in the recent time there was a quite a influx of
>tfw no bf
femanons and they all struggle a lot with 0 attention from boys. So are you just femme fatale or is there any advice so they can also chase boys off (instead of becoming cat ladies)?

And how can you tell they are shy when they actually went and asked you out?
>>
>>18663621

what do you do that you attract this type of guy?
>>
>>18663640
>>18663653
Well, I guess I don't immediately look like "stacy" or something. I have nerdyish hobbies and I'm not fat or hideous at least. I just happen to align with a lot of common traits with these types of insecure/introverted guys but I'm not otherwise interested in the insecure/introverted types. I'm still a rather social person despite my hobbies saying otherwise, I also enjoy going to parties, getting drunk at the bar with some good friends, I'm a jack of all trades really and want someone similar to me.
And again, because I really just want to be the nicest and most encouraging person I can be they come to me because I won't give them the cold shoulder off the bat, I usually will at least talk to me a bit without shutting them down in a cold/rude matter.
I'm starting to wonder if I should be a little more firm because maybe my kindness is just sending wrong messages. I just never used to really think there was any harm in having a simple conversation with them even if I already knew I was highly unlikely to be interested.

>And how can you tell they are shy when they actually went and asked you out?
The approach usually outs them, they do it with little confidence and stumble a bit. Which again, I applaud for going out of their comfort zone and I really do want to encourage them to keep doing this despite my rejection. Even if you stumble that's no reason not to keep at it, because the only way to get confident asking girls out is to keep doing it over and over.

Also some of them I've known beforehand through various outlets, I had classes with them or worked with them or we had mutual friends.
My roommate, god love her, keeps trying to set me up and while I appreciate the gesture, she's a shy introverted girl and therefore only has shy introverted guys to show me. I've since talked to her about talking to me beforehand when she wants to do this though, since she just kept springing these guys on me unannounced and putting me in a bad spot.
>>
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>>18663594
>but you know what you should do, you just lack courage to do it, dont you?
This is definitely a big part of my hesitation, but we've also been getting closer/more physical over time and I'd rather see this progress to casual fwb rather than serious dating at this point in my life. Just finished with a few back-to-back LTRs and have little desire to jump back in. Not that I see either situation as being realistic with this girl, but in an ideal world I wouldn't want to be formally dating her.
>>
Question for everyone, I suppose. Been trying to get this girl who was my first kiss off my mind over the second half of summer, and it was alright. I couldn't just be friends with her, so I tried to cut her out of my life after hanging out a few times in June. She reached out once, but I kept my response short and didn't really start up much conversation. Classes started, and we're in the same program, so we're in every single class together. I tried to be strong, but she was eager to talk to me on the first day and I broke down. However, she was apathetic towards me the rest of the week, and when we exchanged messages when I asked her to hang out, she said she wanted to do it some other peeps from class. I asked if anything was wrong, since we were able to hang out one on one just fine before, but she said she would be more comfortable with other people there. We talked, and I shared how I felt and why I didn't communicate over the Summer, and she seemed relatively apathetic in her messages. It seems obvious to me that, at this point in time at least, she doesn't really care to be available as a friend or anything else. I can't really stop how I feel, nor can she change how she feels, so I would just like to know from you guys, how do you survive in the same environment where you have to co-exist with someone you care about for a year? It's pretty hard whenever I hear her voice or see her doing just fine, my face gets red and has blood rush to it.
>>
How do I meet odd or weird girls? That get maybe a little too obsessed with things, maybe a little bit of the joke autism ? Cuz that's what I'm like, and I can blend into normal society but I'm only ever really comfortable with someone like me.
>>
>>18663661

to me it seems hypocritical to want to be nice and encouraging, and then complain at the same time. you should probably be as curt as possible if you're not interested
>>
>>18663687
>>18663687
you either have to buckle down and suffer through it - accept the pain and try to find some romantic/tragic recompense in the fact that life has given you this opportunity to really *feel* something, even if it hurts - or you can go the opposite route and flirt with other girls while she is within earshot, try to get some petty revenge. Or you could try to find another friend in the class, open up to them about this issue, and keep them as an ally in your struggle.
Whatever you do, forget about your chances with the girl. It's done.
>>
>>18663696
Move next to a liberal city and make an OKC account.

Disclaimer-most of them have dyed hair and have tumblr tier beliefs.
>>
>>18663661
I knew it that the advice would be: just exist lol, but thanks for sharing your life story anyway.

And definitely dont talk to them much, because it gives off the wrong message. Even more when you are like the first girl ever in their lives which treated them nicely (this is very true for below average boys). Or mention indirectly that you already have boyfriend so they get the message within first convo.

Have a nice day femanon.

>>18663679
Do you know the difference between friends and relationship? You dont sleep with your friends. Go for it. You already know each other and for whatever reason you like each other to hang out together. Add in passionate sex and boom: you have relationship. Ask her on date already and aim for kiss at minimum. Good luck?
>>
>>18663708
yeah you're right. i think suggesting a date could mayyybe actually charm her a bit, and if she's repulsed enough to veto that idea i can just peace out happily. i'd feel bad though, we have a couple camping trips planned and there's that side of me that thinks i could just forget. i mean i'm 25, my sex drive isn't as mind-controlling as it used to be. though apparently i'm still just as much of a pussy, looking for any way out of this. how can I commit to something like this
>>
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... friends with ex-GF / ex-BF?
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>>18663733
Nope. Contact is only okay if you have a kid together, and if you have a kid together, I wouldn't be dating you.
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>>18663732
Flip a coin. If tails, ask her on date. If heads, flip again. This way you wont even need courage.

>>18663733
Only if you are masochist and enjoy inflicting pain on yourself.
>>
>>18662756
There is always someone better than someone else. When you like someone or fall in love with someone, you don't compare. You just like the person and no one else. At least that's how it works for me.

>>18663183
1. I enjoy being hugged from behind or putting my leg over him while he's lying on his back
2. No, I wouldn't be offended

>>18663220
I would never do that

>>18663309
I guess it depends on the girl, but I couldn't care less about dancing. I don't know how to ride a bike, so not being able to jump the rope is not such a big deal, I guess (but it's really easy, it's just jumping. How come you can't do that?).

>>18663370
Yes, it is. I love manly man being manly

>>18663453
Depends on the face

>>18663524
Well, if you really want to find out, you can tell her and promise her that if she's not interested, things can just go back to normal. I have a friend who recently told me he had feelings for me (I don't have feelings for him) and it did make things kind of awkward for us. I don't like hanging out with him as much as I used to because I don't want him to get the wrong idea.
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>>18663744
>Flip a coin. If tails, ask her on date. If heads, flip again. This way you wont even need courage.

This.

This is how I asked my first girlfriend out.

And if you feel bad that you landed on the wrong side, well, you know what do either way.
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>get a girls number on Saturday

>ask her to meet me for drinks on Monday night

She said yes but I feel like I might have fucked up. She seemed really into me but at the same time it might be way too soon.

what do the fem anons think?
>>
>>18663275
that looks awful
>>
>>18663733
Being friends with your ex is the biggest fucking mistake you can make. It's a red flag because either a) you're not over them and you're an orbiter or b) you're stringing them along as a backup plan
>>
>>18663696
Either online dating but I'd recommend going straight to the source and going to events for (slightly) autistic people. Eg lectures on how to make the most out of/optimally work around autistic traits during your college studies, some sort of peer groups or whatever if those exist where you live. Girls who are autistic tend to get much better at covering up the signs that give them away so they tend to be less "odd" externally than they really are. In general you can safely assume that most of the "lol I'm so weird" girls are normal girls trying to be cutting edge. Meanwhile the actual weirdos keep their head low.
>>
>>18663275
too skinny.
>>
>>18663751
Girls dont go on dates with boys they dont want to date / sex / marry. Now the only real question left is her hidden agenda. I hope you have a ring ready anon, she wont let you leave.

Dont forget to SMILE, TALK, smile and escallate a bit by kiss / handholding.
http://www.improveyoursocialskills.com/conversation
Have fun?
>>
>>18663751
I'm personally not a fan of long texting in between. Takes the momentum away, I do not like frequent texting under any circumstances, and I don't want to spend time building someone up in my head when I don't even really know how we click in real life. Plus all the energy that goes into second guessing your phrasing and trying to be witty. I don't think it's too soon, essentially.
>>
>>18663275
No, I actually took 9 years of ballet.
>>
Nice threads ,but I noticed there's one dude with the same advice that replies to a billion posts at once and says the same things over and over lol
>>
In about an hour I'm going to "swing dance club" because it's the only thing going on campus today.
I'm going alone and have no friends, how do I look natural and not just be the weirdo standing off by themselves while everyone else showed up with a friend or already knew the people in the club? And how do I get to friend level with any guys who might be there?

I'm a little nervous because I don't really have that much of an interest in swing dancing, but I also can't say I hate it. I've never really tried it.
>>
>>18663783
Could you be any more new here?
>>
>>18663787
Well probably not, just started checking them o it yesterday. Why, is he a meme or something?
>>
>>18663791
bad advice brian
>>
>>18663786
Don't worry too much. No one pays as much attention to how you look as you do. If you are standing there with a constipated face feeling awkward, people will notice. If you are clearly enjoying the show and relaxing with a drink in your hand like your friend or partner could return any minute, no one is going to wonder or care whether you came with anyone.

If you're a guy you're also pretty much set, there's always more girls than guys who want to dance at these kind of events.

And if all else fails, narrate it in your head and see it as a thing that you tried. Better to be disappointed than to have to Beat yourself over the head years later because you never took a chance.
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>>18663791
>Why, is he a meme or something?
More or less. You could make a post about your mothers funeral and he'd tell you to bring condoms. That or settle for a fat chick.
>>
>>18663804
Well its a club meeting so there wont be any alcohol, or refreshments in general I'd assume, but I get the metaphor at least.

Unfortunately no, I'm a woman looking for guys. Which I know this is likely to be a tacofest but as said, only event going on campus today. I've got other things lined up down the week that might be more balanced at least but I'm also not sure where to go for a sausage party other than sports events and I just cannot even pretend to be interested in baseball/football.

In my experience, I've beat myself up more for feeling embarrassed than the "You didnt even try" thing.
But lately both have been feeling equally miserable so I'm trying again
>>
>>18663812
That is unfortunate in terms of the chance that someone is dying to have a dance partner, but the part where no one is going to care as much about your (lack of) company as you will still stands. Also when there's few guys they will likely alternate partners anyway and the threshold will be lower to ask for a dance because it's less personal with few male partners being available to begin with. If all else fails ask a girl who does a good job whether she'd like to show you a couple of moves, most people love an excuse to talk about or show something they love themselves.

That's the thing, it is easy to do that short term. But years from now you are not going to feel embarrassed that you did something fumbly or you went to an event that sucked and was trying to make friends and essentially just working hard to grow into your own and make a sweet life for yourself. There is nothing shameful about that and many of your peers are in the same position, whether you can tell or not. Yet you will feel sorry if you passed up on every chance you got when it only becomes harder to meet a bunch of new people the older you get.
So basically try to keep your expectations of what a success entails low and give yourself more credit for pushing back in the face of less than ideal options. I hope you have fun!
>>
>>18663255
No
>>18663275
I can dance better than that.
>>18663309
Dancing is more like a bonus, not a requirement
>>18663453
Full beard
>>
>>18663769
>>18663766
wow, thanks guys <3
>>
Ladies, what's the appeal of the hairless (excluding the top-of-the-head kind), athlete look for males? Shaven beard, legs, arms and everywhere else. Body is also in good shape so I don't look like a twink etc
>>
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>>18663811
>>
>>18663852
Personally body hair, notably but not exclusively the pubes + happy trail combination, are one of the things I focus most on when thinking of or seeing a male body. So this would absolutely never fly with me.

There are women who hate body hair, though, and no doubt even more women who don't have a strong opinion of it.
>>
Is there any interaction in life thats not influenced by sexuality?
>>
>>18663864
I don't think so if you want to be really puritan about it and include absolutely everything (e.g. even disgust rooted in sexual associations). But if you go that far then "influenced by sexuality" becomes a meaningless label really, because there's so many factors influencing the interaction and sexuality will in many cases not be one of the more prominent ones.
>>
>>18663839
Yeah I can always meet other women but idk I'm not really interested in friends at this point.

Lol dude I still cringe about shit I did in middle school that keeps me up at night. Hell one reoccuring nightmare of mine is a memory of accidentally turning down a one way road the wrong way when I was 16 and newly driving. No idea why that embarrassed/scarred me so much but my subconscious seems to think it was a big deal. I know that's not particularly normal but shit I hold onto the most random embarrassing events of my life and let it eat me alive. So I try to avoid adding to them as much as possible because after all this time I don't see that changing. Just who I am. I wish I could look on the bright side of those embarrassing moments and appreciate I learned something, but I can never get around the cringe of it all to get there.

But I know, I have to take the risks to do anything, so I'm going, but I prefer to have a plan to avoid making this another cringe memory to contemplate suicide over for the next 10 years no matter how silly and mundane it seems to everyone else.
>>
>>18663864
Clarify?

Sexuality is one of our deepest rooted attributes. Without the capability of long term sustainability of any species, there's really no need for any secondary characteristics.

Separating sexuality from humans would defeat the entire concept of humans as a species.

So, answer to a more generalized question would be no. The entire purpose of genders is to allow for genetic diversity and reproduction.
>>
>>18663852
Aesthetic. Not really much else I can think of, other than maybe rooted things from childhood?
Like me personally, my dad's a very hairy man, back hair, chest hair, everywhere ironically except for his head lol. I remember as a kid any time I wanted to take a bath there were always fucking gross ass curty chest hairs in the tub/drain I had to clean out before filling it up. Suppose that maybe created an aversion at a young age, but I obviously had a disgust for hair to begin with.

Pubs though are another story. Nobody likes to suck a hairy dick.
>>
Guys;
What would you think of a girl who sends you nudes (if you asked for them and she enjoyed herself) before you are bf and gf?
>>
>>18663893
That's the main thing anyway (about approaching girls), not so much that you form a friendship but rather that you have a back up plan in case you feel too awkward standing by yourself and there's no guy in sight. There is also a chance that you can arrange dancing with someone through someone else, e.g. by asking if she knows whether any guy swaps partners because you'd like to give it a try as well.

I don't blame you for losing hope after all this time but I take it that you are still at most in your early twenties. There is a reason why everyone says that you stop giving (as much of) a fuck as you age. Now I'm not trying to say that you don't have above average anxiety or might benefit from medication/therapy or whatever else, just that it is too early to assume that it'll be this way forever. In the grand scheme of things hardly anyone has really come into their own yet in their teens or even twenties, coming of age is called that way for a reason.
For what it's worth, I do recognize what you say and while it was never -as- bad for me, I absolutely have many memories that have haunted me for years and years including rather normal kid stuff (like acting uncharacteristically bratty towards my mom when I was literally four years old, shit stayed with me for ten+ years and even now I do not like to recall the memories) and for me the sharp edges absolutely have softened. In part because at some point I got so fucking tired of always being afraid and feeling ashamed and guilty that it was like a switch was flipped and I was suddenly convinced that I'd rather be mortified sometimes than live a wasted life cowering in inflated embarrassment. It wasn't a magical cure but it set things in motions and in my mid twenties I am more relaxed and less easily embarrassed etc with every passing year. All of my friends (and my older sister) recognize this. Again if you come from a worse place then it will likely take more, but I do believe it will improve.
>>
>>18663908
I would think that she's a human being, who happens to be a woman, who is the opposite of my gender, who also appears to be in the mood for reproducing.

You strike me as the type of person that didn't shove a lot of things up your butt as a kid.
>>
>>18663908
Mostly just turned on.
>>
>>18663908
guys only accuse or perceive women as slutty if they see her acting sexually towards someone else. when its directed at them they feel special.

unless , yknow you actually ARE a slut or something
>>
Ladies,

What do you look for in a "good" tinder or bumble profile other than physical attractiveness?
I know my looks obviously won't be winning anyone over, so what can I do otherwise?
>>
>>18663908
I think she would be just teasing and mocking me.
>>
>>18663908

I would think that she MIGHT want to sleep with me, or she might be one of those people that just gets off to showing off but never really wants anything more (AKA, a tease).

Either way, I wouldn't mind it. I'd enjoy it for what it is. It's pretty fucking sexy.

That said, if it were looking like something more than casual, I'd have to ask if she does that kind of thing alot, when she likes guys.
Regardless of whether or not it's a red-flag to a guy, it'll be nice to be prepared in case he accidentally stumbles onto nuder of you on the internet.

I mean, shit, unprepared, all bets are off, her could react with a "nice... she's hot" or it could remind him that at some point, it was another guy making you cum, and that could bother him a bit.
If he knows to kind of expect it (assuming you sent nudes to other people) then it won't bother him so bad.

So really, you should only be concerned if you looking for anything more than casual, like emotionally investing in that guy or whatever.

And if you are looking for that, warn him about your past BEFORE he gets too attached. Seriously, it does make it easier to deal with.
>>
>>18663940
Just wanted to say that this is not true. I have heard men complain about women fucking (them) on the first date, sending nudes - hell, today on here I spoke to a guy who assumed a girl was a slut because she approached him to give him her number.

There is definitely truth in what you say, that they are much more critical when it concerns someone else, but her fear isn't entirely unfounded.
>>
>>18663959
damn thats a good point

i personally would never do that, sex on a first date sounds like a dream come true for me

probably depends on the type of man
>>
>>18663940
>guys only accuse or perceive women as slutty if they see her acting sexually towards someone else.
I had man calling me a slut just because I was wearing a tight top, or because I did the first move with a guy a liked (literally talking to him, not even flirting).
>>
Why does my ex only talk to me when he's high
>>
>>18663945
>accurate pictures (preferably several pictures in different settings, e.g. one with natural lighting, one dressed up, one casual, one comical one) to get a proper idea of what you look like and make sure that I would recognize you outside so to speak
>quite clear description of what you are looking for (not just either for a relationship or casual, but specifications like do you want to "hang out" or do you want to go to a museum or bar together, are you looking for casual stuff only or casual without ruling out a possible relationship, are platonic contacts also welcome - you don't have to address all of these of course as long as it's obvious what you have in mind)
>some clue about what I can ask you about (not travel, food or music but more specific stuff)

Also invest in learning how to flirt/tease!
>>
>>18663964
It absolutely does. It's a complicated issue, there are many factors at play. Eg sometimes men care personally and they just find the girl not that attractive anymore when they have learned that she is "easy". But sometimes they do not personally care much but feel like their friends would look down on them (cuck/beta, whatever) for it and that hurts their ego. Sometimes they are intimidated by the behavior more than turned off.. and so on.
>>
>>18663974
Because he feels horny and/or sentimental.
>>
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>>18663924
True, I know networking is the way to go in finding a date, but I also feel like my intentions are obvious when talking to other women, I don't actually care to get to know them I'm just trying to go through them to meet other people.

Yeah I suppose, guess I'm just waiting for the age where my life and personality are gonna be concrete. I want off the pubertycoaster man. Ironically I know a lot of this shit is just age related, I had to take a course on adolescent psychology for my education degree even, but I still can't help feel like I'm the exception. While also knowing adolescent psychology dictates of course I feel like that so does fucking everyone and the reality is we're not that special.
College is better than high school I will say, I've done shit and taken risks on things with 20 somethings I would have never even humored doing as a teen, because I knew 20 somethings would take it way less seriously than teenagers would. (Fuck teenagers still scare me, and I'm gonna teach em history in a few years lol at least the power inbalance of being their teacher makes me feel better lol)
But I'm also afraid if I just sit around with my thumb up my ass until I'm 25-30 I'll be really behind in life. My close friends and relatives have all settled into relatively stable relationships by this point and have secure friend groups while I haven't gotten all that yet. 5ish years from now they're gonna be sending me wedding invites, then a couple years after that I'm gonna be going to baby showers, and I'm scared I'm gonna be seriously behind on it all. I'm also in my 5th and final (god willing) year of college while a lot of my friends are starting their first career related jobs so that doesn't help my anxiety of being left behind, and I also feel like I've wasted my college time stuck in the books. Never went out and partied, never went out to socialize much, just stayed in an struggled enough to keep my grades passing.
>>
>>18663968
basically because he saw you and thought he would never get with a woman as confident as you

as far as i can tell men dont really care about these sort of standards, it all stems from jealousy
>>
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>>18663903
So can ugly people ever be happy?
>>18663875
So, can ugly people be happy??
>>
>>18663989
Ah well, there's a lot of grey area in between using someone and wanting to learn about their deepest truest self. If you are to talk to women they will likely also not want to spend a very drawn out time chatting to you, not because of lack of interest necessarily either. As long as you treat people respectfully and do pay genuine attention to them for as long as you interact, they are not going to care. Hell if you dare to go there a quick "hey sorry that I'm bombarding you but I feel a bit out of place here" can work wonders with a lot of people. It is disarming and virtually everyone knows what it's like to feel odd and self-conscious somewhere.

Teenagers can definitely be scary, heh, that's some next level shit. But yes one of the best things about twenty somethings in comparison is that most people have grown out of the extreme insecurity that makes them want to do anything to feel better about themselves, and flat out being mean or impolite for no reason in most situations does not get the same silent approval.
Either way it is totally normal that you would feel worried about getting behind somehow, but as trite as the saying is, you are really only trying to live and better your own life. There is absolutely no saying at all how those lives will pan out. Most people would vouch for a longer time figuring themselves out over mindlessly living life until they are hit with a midlife crisis and existential doubt. Or just divorced. It is not like the time you spend now, trying to work on your issues and do something outside of your comfort zone and reflecting and what not, doesn't count at all just because it isn't the typical milestones. All that is investment in yourself and your personal growth, and it builds a foundation for whatever life brings you.
An example is that I used to be friends with a bunch of late bloomers and we all lamented not having had our first kiss or boyfriend yet at x age, then y age, then z age. Post too long..
>>
Girls when you're walking on the street with a guy coming up to you, do you prefer he gives you some subtle greeting like a smile/wave or just moves on past you?
>>
>>18664028
>>18664028
I used to feel like I would never catch up with girls who had been dating since they were thirteen or fourteen. Now I actually have some friends who had lives like that and yes, sure, they learned things but at the same time they got damaged by the inexperienced relationships (what no one tells you about puppy love is that it can be brutally cruel because there's two hormonal, naturally insecure and self-centered people with little experience and not fully formed empathy together) and had to unlearn some of that and try to reprogram their ideas about men, love or sex for years to come. It isn't black and white, once you have an experience in the pocket that's a solid positive. And vice versa.

This is also a fairly random realization but if you have the option, I can very strongly recommend working in customer service, particularly a place where you talk to 100-200 people a day like a busy call center. I worked jobs like this and it helped tremendously for giving me social perspective, because I did not just intellectually realize but understood by experiencing it again and again that I cannot single-handedly influence the outcome of any interaction. And am thus not responsible for any outcome. Because if you treat customer A as polite, quick and kind as you can, they are pleasantly surprised and grateful. At the exact same treatment customer B doesn't react because they think it's the least they can expect for what they pay or because they think it's hollow and fake. Customer C is having a bad day or just a less than nice person and snarls at me to be quicker and hangs up before I can ask them if they want to know anything else.

I can imagine many reasons why you'd be opposed to this but just wanted to put the idea out there. Either way I hope some of this was somewhat helpful.
>>
>>18664036
Absolutely nothing? If we happen to make eye contact then a little smile is fine, but don't go out of your way to do anything.
>>
>>18664021
First of all, that I said everything is in essence influenced by sexuality does not mean that it is sexual. Eg say that you are doing something with your father and he is standing too close to you or touching you in a way that makes you uncomfortable though not being objectively inappropriate. That unease stems from being a sexual being and having associations with being that close that you do not feel comfortable feeling around your father, or simply around a man. But that doesn't mean that it's sexual interaction in itself. Just that your sexuality plays SOME factor in how you perceive it.

Secondly, sex doesn't have that much to do with good looks. People in nursery homes fuck rampantly.
>>
>>18664036
For me a smile, but it's a bit of a knee jerk reflex I have to look for eye contact with anyone coming towards me, and smile whenever it happens. For whatever reason I have always found it uncomfortable to not acknowledge someone in that situation, unless I am with someone else or genuinely distracted/lost in thought.

Having said that I would think nothing of a lack of acknowledgment. A lot of people do this as well. It isn't abnormal in any way.
>>
>>18663945
Something fun and self-aware.
So guys who only have pics of them clearly posing are out.
Also clear, life-like pics of mediocre guys >> artsy fartsy distorted photos of handsome guys.
>>
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>>18664021
>sex = happiness
>>
Girls
If your bf is a virgin, should he tell you before or after sex (she probably wouldve noticed)

I dont know how to deal with this situation
>>
>>18664043
I don't mean to ignore you, but I have nothing to say in reply - I did read and got things from your reply. Just saying, because I'm about to reply to this anon with more interest and don't want you to take it personally
>>18664068
I get the greentext but why the image? Does it mean something or just a face? Kurt was borderline asexual, please explain clearly your reasonings.


I will add that I have struggled with this for a long time, not because I'm ugly but because I am possibly aspie and have always seen beauty/sexuality = your value to others.
>>
>>18664041
This
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>>18663989
>>18664021
>>
So.

I knew a 40 yo woman who says she's a sub wicca into all kind of kinky sexual stuff.

now she wants to have sex with me. What should I expect?
>>
>>18664101
Kinky sexual stuff.
>>
>>18664104

thanks genius. What the fuck is a wiccan sub?
>>
>>18664109

>What the fuck is a wiccan sub?

Why the fuck are you asking us what you can expect from a person we know nothing about? Ask her yourself, genius.
>>
>>18664101
Never heard of a Wiccan sub as a sex thing but google also hasn't and given what I know of Wicca shit she probably just finds it highly important for her sense of identity to stress her spiritual beliefs. For many people with beliefs like these it is not just about what you believe might exist in terms of the supernatural but rather an attitude towards life, more comparable to buddhism. Wanting to live in a wholesome way, be humble about your place in the universe, empathetic and understanding etc. Though I don't rule out that she likes pagan elements in kinky sex but I don't think it's this whole kinkscene in itself.
>>
>>18664075
bump pls
>>
>>18664077
>I am possibly aspie
Not possibly mate, you are.
>>
>>18664117

I asked because maybe someone in here knows more than me about this category.

I asked but she said something vague and talked about kinky things. I think there is more.

also don't be an asshole, please.
>>
>>18664124

thank you
>>
>>18664126
If you're going to tell her anyway, before. Personally I would want to know but I can understand not telling, especially outside of a relationship.

It all boils down on the girl, some won't care and will just accept that you got cold feet, whatever. Others will feel upset that you didn't trust them to have a good response. Or for taking your first time without realizing it and perhaps taking the lead more etc.
>>
>>18664131

>also don't be an asshole, please.

You're the one who started off with the attitude, bruv. You're asking us to make assumptions about someone based on the fact that they identify as a "wiccan sub". The woman was vague as fuck. We literally know less than you do about the situation so why are you asking us and not her? "Wiccan sub" is not a species of Pokemon. We have no idea what that means. Fuck off.
>>
>>18664075
You dont build relationship on lies anon. What do you have to lose by being honest? Except your virginity?
>you wont last even 10 seconds anyway
Dont forget to cuddle and let her teach you how to eat her out properly!
>>
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Girls: I've hooked up with this girl about 4-5 times now. Would it be weird to sit down and talk to her about what she likes sexually? Right now I'm just kind of winging it and it's working, but I feel like I know her enough now that we could start trying to do more things.
>>
>>18664152
http://mojoupgrade.com/
Go ahead but dont complain when she will tie you up and peg you later.
>>
>>18664141

Don't mind man, I'm confused at least as you are. Thanks for answering btw.
>>
>>18664164
If you've ever used mojo upgrade, you'd know that it only suggests things that both of you would like to do.
>>
>>18664152
It isn't weird but the sad truth is that many people just are weird when it comes to talking about sex. Whether they are fifteen or thirty-five and whether they already had sex with that person a thousand times or never. How she reacts will have more to do with her attitude on this in general than with her feelings about you.

The safest way to go is to amp it up over time. Start with encouraging her the next time to provide more feedback. You can get away with a lot as long as you pass it off as dirty talk (= passionate, rather than instructive or confused). "I want to make you go crazy, tell me what you want". Or before going down on her whisper in her ear that she better give you feedback because you plan on making her come. Stuff like that. If you do not do dirty talk during sex then ask her what she'd like to do during foreplay.

The goal here isn't to secure a shitload of information with a few lines in the heat of the moment. But if she reacts normal enough to this (which means, she doesn't freeze up or get turned off), you can introduce talking about fantasies during pillow talk. I highly recommend being positive and starting with the angle that it is a turn on to freely discuss sexual thoughts, not that you are fishing for ways to improve your sex life. An easy opening is starting with something you love about her - either her body or (better still) the way she acts or a move of hers. Ease her from complimenting you in turn to talking about general patterns she finds hot. Eg if you say that it gets you going how much smaller she is than you and how easily you can move her around, that makes it easier for her to say she's into being dominated. Do not expect her to feel like revealing actually stigmatized kinks/fantasies to you, though.

If all this goes well the potential final step is to ask if anything could improve for her, indeed let her do mojoupgrade or kinkquiz.com, tell her you want to scratch some things off her bucket list for her.
>>
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>>18664189
>>
>>18664093
Ty, saved that pic.
>>18664128
Idk if aspie is real or It's just how I adapted throughout life. Life is pretty bad in general. Have a bad day...
>>
>>18664109
A wiccan is a retard into stupid pagan shit after they got high and went to /x/. A sub is a person who is subservient in bed.

I'm such a fuckin genius for deciphering this riddle wrapped in a mystery in an enigma even though you could have googled this shit.
>>
>>18664267

Thing is that she presented her identity like it is a dangerous mistery. Of course sub + wiccan is what you said.

Howewer I feel relieved.
>>
Girls

Do you find attractive a confident guy even if he is ugly af?
>>
>>18664280
Only when he is moderately ugly
>>
>>18664280
>Anonymous 08/28/17(Mon)12:05:29 No.18664189 â–¶>>18664212
>>>18664164
>If you've ever used mojo upgrade, you'd know that it only suggests things that both of you would like to do.
No. Confidence helps, especially if you're average, but it's not going to make an ugly un-ugly.
>>
>>18664279
>Thing is that she presented her identity like it is a dangerous mistery.
Wiccans are fucking retarded and all pretend they're geniuses and mysterious and DEEP.

My fucking aunt is one and she's shoved every pantheon you can think of into some wretched amalgamation. It's like fucking fanfiction when you get down to it. God I hate family reunions.
>>
>>18664309

oook.

I'll stick again on my dear right hand, a porn of Elsa Jean will do the job. Way better than these bullshits.
>>
>>18664280
Depends on his other qualities. If he really is ugly as fuck (which I doubt but let's run with the premise) then he needs more than confidence itself to be downright quite appealing.
But I do find confidence sexy on a conventionally unattractive guy. Very, in fact, because it cannot be faked as easily as confidence on someone who has everything going for him. It takes nerve to for example flirt boldly when most people would find you ugly. I like that. Appearance is (to me but I'd wager to most women) not the core of sex appeal at all and a man being confident about his sex appeal despite not having looks only drives home to me that we both know that's not what matters when shit goes down.
>>
>>18661431
Guy asking girl, what do you do after a hook up where you want more?
>>
>>18664335
What I would do? It has never happened but I'm pretty sure I would try to casually send funny images/gifs with enough time apart that he doesn't think much of it, but is reminded that I exist. And then probably get drunk some night and text him that I still masturbate to the memories.

If you mean what you should do, the first step is to try your best to make sure the sex is good for both of you, there's no awkwardness around the morning after and so on. Then tell her "I had lots of fun, I'd like to see more of you" or some variation. At this point you establish that you're not looking for a relationship if that wasn't clear already. Send her a text some time later and when she replies ask to hang out again. The second or third time ask to be FWBs as you have a good connection, are compatible, are on the same page with expectations etc. Try to bring it up casually as something that could just make a lot of sense for where you are in your lives.
If it's too late for all of this and you cannot casually re-insert herself in your life to hopefully re-insert yourself in her body, your best bet is giving her a booty call that makes it both clear that she really got to you and that she's in for quite a night if she shows up. For the record I'm talking dirty talk, no dick pics (unless you know she likes them).
>>
>>18664348

as soon as I read these things and I realize that they don't happen to me anymore I feel like I'm gay.
>>
>Get QT Tinder girl's number, chat
>Arrange a date that falls through
>Last night, She seems to ask me to come over
>Offer, and she talks about it for a bit
>Then she gets nervous and does a 180
>She just seems to want to snapchat now
it's sunk lads innit
>>
>>18664381
You can still save it by working with Snapchat and then getting to "we should do this some time". She probably got cold feet because she doesn't know you at all.
>>
GIRLS

What's the consensus about hair on chest? I'm not body-builder shredded by any means, but I have some decent muscle. I feel like girls would probably appreciate a clean chest more than one with hair on it but fuck me; seems like a lot of hair to keep under control.

Do you get a pass if you've got a bit of hair but you're in good shape?
>>
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>Be friends with girl for 5 years
>Went to party together
>She ended up getting really drunk
>Sitting next to each other at bonfire
>She starts telling me things
>"I only hangout with you because I have no one else"
>A bit shocked and confused so I ask what she means
>"If I had more friends I would hangout with them instead, it's not hard to make friends as a girl, I'm just lazy so I just settle for you"
>She starts listing my faults one by one
>And why I'm so horrible to hangout with
>I'm completely stunned as she tells me everything she hates about me


She went on to tell me about how we would never hangout if she had more friends and how we will most likely grow apart once she starts getting "newer and better" friends as she put it, this is the girl I've spent the last 5 years being best friends with, keep in mind we're not romantically involved in any single way and we've both been in relationships with other people but remained close friends, she has NEVER said anything this hurtful before to me and I have no idea what to do, she came to me today asking if I was alright and acting like everything was fine and I just said yes, I don't think she remembers telling me any of this, she has also NEVER acted like this or ever said a hurtful thing to me before

Do I bring it up?
Do I shrug it off as some kind of sick fucking joke?
Do I ignore it and continue being friends?
Do I tell her everything and never speak to her again?

I'm honestly heartbroken, feel like I've just been stabbed right in the back.
>>
>>18664493
Completely drop her. You're just a prop so she isn't alone.
>>
>>18664093
Look at me, choosing to be happy. I'm deciding to be happy.
Oh wait...
>>
>>18664493
You'd be surprised what fucked up shit can come out of peoples' mouths when drunk, but she sounds like a cunt man; even alcohol couldn't be good enough excuse for something like that.

Could be that maybe she wants something more with you, but she's 'scared' of committing and has sort of subconsciously decided instead of looking at you as a best friend for another 5 years she might as well just say something super cut throat to try get rid of you.

Best advice would be to honestly just ask her about it and then make what you think to be the best decision. Communication has always been key if you want to keep relationships stable.

Ask her about it, get her side of the story, decide if you think what she's saying is justified enough or she's just making up complete excuses. Judge if she's actually sorry and actually cares, try figure out the root reason as to why she said it to begin with.

Stay level headed and try make the best decision possible, in my opinion worst thing you could do is ignore what's been said and keep on keeping on like nothing's happened.
>>
>>18664529
Solid advice, but I worry because what if she plays it off as a joke? Says something like "Oh I was just kidding" or "Geeze can't you take a joke?" and try to turn it around on me?

Not to sound sexist but girls always seem to try to flip the situation so it's the other person's fault, and I honestly don't know how I would handle it if she did, I could just be honest and say that it hurt be greatly but then she might get pissy or think I'm being over dramatic because she wasn't thinking straight due to the booze.
>>
>>18664381
Seems to me at least that she's getting cold feet; like everyone does really.

It's all really nice talking to someone, imagining everything that could be in your imagination. And then comes the time where you actually have to nut up and talk in real life, put yourself out there, put your flaws on the table, be willing to accept their flaws, have your unrealistic expectations crushed, have your realistic expectations crushed, etc, etc.

Seems like she just wants to either get some filthy chat out of you, send some nudes, and help each other out in that way. Or she wants you to just come over real quick and smash her. From what I can gather seems like she's interested in something longer term but just unsure and scared of jumping in at the moment.

All speculation of course, you're the better judge in the end.
>>
>>18664465
This is like asking if girls like vanilla ice cream. Some do, some don't.
>>
>>18663239
>>18662994
>She will want a baby in less than a year. Are you sure you want that? Talk about babies with her asap. Otherwise it doesnt matter. And are you sure you cant date somebody younger?

Why you assume she want a baby at all?
Plus you think hitting 30 means she have no time left to be a mom?

Worst advice I've ever heard.
>>
>>18664552
Just have to keep level headed man. If she really said some pretty nasty shit like, "I'm only with you because I have no one better to hang out with, and if I did I would drop you in a second."

That's not really a joke; that's called being a cunt. And that's what you'd have to say to her I guess, "So what? You think that pointing out how quick you would be to drop me if you found a better friend is a joke? Didn't really seem like a joke, if it did sound like a joke do you think I'd even be bringing it up now?"

It is really just as much a testament to your character as much as hers. Are you willing to accept alcohol as a justification to her actions? Are you willing to give a second chance for something like this? How much do you value loyalty?

I'm a bit biased, especially how I've phrased the questions but in all honesty - if you're willing to let it be water under the bridge then you can always see how she continues to act after the fact; if she tries to make up for it.

After all, actions speak louder than words so she might know she's made a mistake and just be too proud to admit it in words. Just make sure that if you go down that avenue you don't just ignore all the bullshit she might pull because 'things will get better.'
>>
>>18664558
Fair point, thought it would be down to a preference thing.

I guess any decent girl who's not a fan will just mention it in some way or another and then I can change it then - probably wouldn't want to be with a girl who considers it a 'deal breaker' anyway.

Just a matter of getting the girl to begin with hmmmm
>>
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>>18664573
>"worst advice i've ever heard"
>this coming from the guy with the name "Hot handjob thread"
>>
>>18662994
Go for it, a 5 year gap it's absolutely not a problem.

And for the virgin issue, if she loves you there won't be any problem, she wants you for a long term relationship not for one night stand.
>>
>>18664590
Forgot to change that.
I'm laughing so hard right now. Hahahhaha
>>
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>>18661431
what is it like to be the same gender as Donald Trump?
>>
>>18664669
What's it like to be the same species as Donald Trump? I don't identify with him because of how i was born.
>>
>>18664669

Amazingly. Except for the fact that you have to work hard become rich like Trumps to fuck the most appealing women, because your gender monetized sex.
>>
>>18664687
This.
>>
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>>18664692
>>18664687
Supply and demand brothers. If you weren't buying there'd be nothing to sell. As the consumer you have full control of the market, and thus only yourselves to blame.
>>
>>18661431
how do I not lose hope of finding someone?
I'm rapidly approaching thirty and I'm a kissless virgin and I want to marry another virgin because of anxiety disorder and various personal reasons
I've tried going to meet-ups for various mental shit that I have (or shit adjacent to mental shit that I have)
every person I met in real life was old or ugly, maybe one or two were average-looking and they were in relationships already
a month or two ago I started trying on-line dating
almost every single person on there is ugly, the few that aren't are mediocre
I'm not a huge stickler for looks and I don't think they're the most important thing but I want to date someone I'm attracted to
also I really doubt even the autistic chicks have never had a single date like me
how do I find someone that's as much of a lost cause as I am?
>>
>>18664697

No.

Sex is the most natural thing in the world, and your gender craves for it more than our does. It's like you are selling the sunlight. Immoral, cheap, and evil.

So, coming back to your question, it feels amazing to be born with a penis.
>>
>>18664718
The market don't lie, plus even biologically speaking women tend to have lower sex drives than men on average.

Face it, you're driving the market. You can just jerk off for free, you spent many years doing it. But you want better so why should it be free? You gotta buy it friendo.

Also wasn't my question, just pointing out how "WAAAHHH I HAVE TO WORK FOR SEX" falls more on men than women. You're your own reason you have to work for it.
>>
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>>18664714
>anxiety disorder
>every single person is ugly
>want to marry virgin
>approaching 30
Mate, you got so many problems and as a bonus you sound super shallow, obnoxious and boring. Try solving your "anxiety", you are old enough to grow up from fear of talking to strangers and lower your standards. A lot.
>>
>>18664280
Absolutely yes. My exboyfriend was ugly and short af, but he would get the prettiest girls all the time and they would madly fall in love with him. I fell for him hard too. He was just really smart and confident
>>
>>18664465
I guess it depends on how much of it you have. And depends on the girl too. I don't mind body hair so much. If there's way too much of it, I think that's a turn-off for almost any girl (but like, waaay too much)

>>18664493
It's not her fault the way she feels, but she shouldn't have told you that. I think you should never speak to her again and go your own way. You have to have some dignity. There are people out there who will want you as a friend and not as a last minute option
>>
>>18664730

women has higher sex drive.

Either you're trolling me, or you're missing the point. If I jerk off you miss the dick, and you need it. You sacrifice your pleasure for money. Your gender is Jew.
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