Boyfriend planned to kill himself

>plan
>date
>means

take him to the hospital
he's going to be there for a few days

>>18466639
I asked him if he wanted me to take him, and he is very serious that he does not want to go.

He is asleep right now anyways.

>>18466649
>he is very serious that he does not want to go.

He also seemed very serious to kill himself, so I don't think he's the best judge of what is good for him.

>>18466654
I know that he is not in a good place. But he said repeatedly that he does not want to go. I also would feel very guilty if I were to leave him at the hospital and make him stay alone at a place he does not want to be, even if it is only for a short time.

I will talk to him about this again tomorrow when he is awake and calm.

Yeah, take him to the psychologist, he needs to talk to a professional, or psychiatrist so he can get some pills. I've been there, almost same thing that happened to your boyfriend happened to me, and it's been a year and half from when I tried to kill myself, it botched, and nobody knew about it, and now I wish they did, so they could send me to a doctor, because now I'm just lethargic.
Take him to a professional.

>>18466654
Just because he wants to kill himself doesn't mean he has bad judgment. Fuck off retard
>>18466672
stop being a fucking nagging bitch. Holy shit. respect boundaries you cunt

>>18466672
You don't seem to understand the severity of the situation.

You have in your possession a man who IS READY to end his own life on friday. Have you established any trust that he won't try this again? Has he shown any regret for even considering suicide? Do you have any certainty he won't continue with his already established plans?

Stop listening to him. He isn't thinking straight and is subconsciously trying to stop you from actually helping him.

>>18466688
>want to kill yourself
>not bad judgement
are you literally retarded?

>>18466688
What is your problem?

>>18466700
>wanting to kill yourself
>bad judgment
are you literally retarded?

See I can shitpost too!
>>18466703
roastie whores like you ruining things

>>18466705
Why don't you go kill yourself if you're such a good judge

>>18466706
you first

>>18466705
>roastie whores like you ruining things
I'm not her. Simply fuck off if you don't have anything intelligent to add.
Also, >>>/r9k/

>>18466705
Dude...why do you have to sperg out so hard? Is this fun for you? It's sad to watch.

>>18466714
sure you aren't. I'm watching the ip count you whore. don't play stupid
>>18466716
nice projection

>>18466719
>sure you aren't. I'm watching the ip count you whore. don't play stupid

These are my posts:
>>18466714
>>18466703
>>18466687
Now stop being an asshole, and fuck off this thread.
What are you even doing on /adv/, anyway?

>>18466700
I just want to be with him on Friday so that he does not kill himself. Of course I will encourage him to seek extra help. But he is the sort of man who always has the final say in any decision he makes, and I do not want to take that freedom away from him, so I will not force him to do that. The only thing I feel comfortable forcing him to do now is to not actually follow his suicide plans.

>>18466737
Look.
The facts are if he has a
>Plan
>Date
>Means
>Drive
means that this is not an impulse
he has been thinking about this for a while
Get him help while you still have him around.

>>18466629
If it's any consolation, you won't have to worry about this for long.

Also, congratulations on being my darkest joke ever. Your very real position helped me make a killer joke...

oops

>>18466749

I dunno. Friday is pretty far away. Clearly that boyfriend isn't an industrialist at all. He's not killing himself on a reasonable schedule. He shouldn't have wasted time with a note, just stab himself in the throat with a pen.

You kinda have 2 options here, take him to hospital or watch him 24/7 and be a helicopter girlfriend/parent. I suffered the same fate (depression and suicide and is still current with me) for 10 years now. Your boyfriend if he is committed to doing this, will be 10 steps ahead of you. he made a note for you and you caught on early and you stopped him in his tracks. how many times can you do that again? those are the only 2 viable options in my point of view seek professional help and get him medicated. or find out whats going if its financial, work, stress, sex, future, living arrangements, or psychological (chemical imbalance in the brain)

>>18466754
notes are usually more for legal reasons

Alright, well if you love him so much then at least be reasonable about his desires.

Make it a double suicide and at least invite some friends over to make it a party. You could mix up some KOOL-AID.

>>18466758
Kool-Aid? They're not niggers. They need to go Jonestown and mix them up some Flavor-Aid!

I mean if you're gonna do something, you do it right.

>>18466700
This, this this.

He almost certainly is still planning to die. If you don't take this seriously, there is a very good chance he will end his life.

I cannot stress to you how important it is you call the police and have him taken to the hospital. In the morning, sit down and talk to him while recording on your computer/phone without him knowing. Discuss the suicide again with him so you have a record of it. Shortly after, as soon as you can step out, call the police. Meet them outside BEFORE they come in. Show them the note, video, and have him committed. Be prepared to come down and show a psychologist the note and video as well. Because he sounds like he's able to control his affect quite well and could fool a psychologist into thinking you're a jilted ex or an angry girlfriend, which is why you do need a recording of him saying it. There is a REASON that if people have a detailed plan and date set for suicide, they get put in a safe ward. It's because they fully intend to do it. If you don't get people involved you're risking his life.

>>18466737
The thing that you don't seem to understand is that you can't keep him safe or help him, whereas a hospital can. They can literally make it impossible for him to kill himself and give him some time to reset and stop thinking in that way. Now if you're afraid of the blame he'll put on you, there are ways to get around that. You can collaborate with your mother or someone and have them insist that THEY called the police after a conversation with you- you can even literally have them do it for you.

This isn't something you can just hold his hand thru and hope it goes away. If you don't have him committed, it's very likely he'll just commit suicide after you go to sleep, or on a different day.

>>18466765
Get you some MAD DOG 20/20.

>>18466773
Like I said, they're NOT niggers. I mean look at how well she writes and how she's not beaten or gang-raped.

They could go full white-bread and OD on PBR and Oxycontin.

>>18466746
This.. ffs how dumb do you have to be. She's gonna wake up to his corpse

>>18466781
Which she will kiss millions of times in order to hear his heartbeat... or whatever it was she said.

>>18466746
>>18466756
I think I will try to spend all of my time with him on Thursday and Friday, to give him lots of kisses and cuddles and talk to him to calm him down.

After that, I will point out that Friday has passed and that he did not die, and that there is reason to live life. Then I will tell him to get medicated to keep him sane and strong.

I know there are alarmed people saying to get him to a hospital immediately, but I know him well and I imagine this to be the best way to convince him to get medication.

>>18466727
r9k and pol occasionally leak over here.

But yeah, try to get him to take some help, whatever that may be.
>>18466771 is 100% correct.

Call 911, they will force him to go to the hospital which frankly is what he needs.

>>18466785
Enjoy your manslaughter charges when he kills himself and it was found out you knew and didn't do anything to stop him.

Living past Friday is not a reason to continue living for him. Stop trying to think for him. His brain and your brain are completely different and his isn't working properly.

S E E K
H E L P
I M M E D I A T E L Y

>>18466785
>I know him well and I imagine this to be the best way to convince him to get medication.
>The scariest part is that he was showing absolutely no signs of having unhealthy thoughts.
>I have never even seen him cry before.
Apparently you don't know him that well. Enjoy having a dead boyfriend on your hands and wishing you'd done something instead of trusting a CLEARLY suicidal person to not kill themselves because you asked really nicely.

>>18466785
If it helps, I have just removed all of the things he could die with - any toxic liquids, sharp objects, charcoal (he intended to die with carbon monoxide poisoning), and fire starters. We live on the 2nd floor of our building, so he won't do that either.

>>18466797
A suicidal person can kill themselves with nearly anything. Once a handcuffed person shattered their glasses, and used the shards to slit their wrists and then ate the rest of the shards.

You are not a professional and you cannot help him in this state beyond getting him to the people who can.

>>18466785
>After that, I will point out that Friday has passed and that he did not die, and that there is reason to live life.

Yeah dont mention this to him, it will sound like this: "Hey faggot, Friday came and went and you didnt do the shit you planned out to do. You are a loser who never keeps his promises, daddy was right you lil chickenshit cunt."

Obvs idkwtftd, so just call a professional. That suggestion of you to secretly record the convo and show it to the cops is a no no.

>>18466797
Don't forget shoelaces, shirts, pants, belts, etc. There's lots of ways for an industrious moron to off himself.

>>18466797
You're so irresponsible and deluded it's unreal. Do you plan to stay awake for the next week straight and follow him into the shower to make sure he hasn't hung himself? He can get up and go outside and end it as soon as you fall asleep idiot.

>oh jeez this guy is about to kill himself
>"Take him to the hospital"
>oh no i wont do that, the guy who was going to kill himself told me not to

fucking lmao

>>18466804
>That suggestion of you to secretly record the convo and show it to the cops is a no no.
If you're going to make an argument give a premise (reason) as to why your argument makes sense other than "its a no no"- what are you four?

>>18466816
christ alive lmao
it's become comical at this point, OP has no intentions of actually helping him so let's point and laugh

>>18466629
Rekindle your love and give him a reason to live.

>>18466809
He's not going to do it in the morning, not if he cannot do it peacefully and alone. He already told me this, he said he cannot do it in the spur of the moment. I am on top of him now, and I am a light sleeper, so he will not wake up without waking me up.

I will report back to this thread to prove to you that he will not be dead tomorrow. I know this man well enough to be of help to him until he is comfortable to get medication.

>>18466833
>I know this man well enough to be of help to him until he is comfortable to get medication.

NO YOU OBVIOUSLY FUCKING DONT IF YOU HAD NO IDEA HE WAS SO DEPRESSED THAT HE HAD A FUCKING PLAN TO KILL HIMSELF AT THE END OF THE GODDAMN WEEK

YOU'RE SO FUCKING LUCKY YOU EVEN FOUND A NOTE AND NOW YOU'RE JUST GOING TO LET HIM OFF WITH A SLAP ON THE WRIST AND ENABLE HIM TO TRY AGAIN

FUCK
KILL YOURSELF TOO

>>18466833
Oh my god OP he needs help. He's going to fucking die lmao. It's going to be your fault, too. Get him some help already, he has serious psychological issues that you aren't qualified to deal with. Sit him down, tell him you care about him, and you're terrified of losing him.

Suicidal ideation with a plan is the sign that you need intervention from a professional--and now. Unless you have a medical degree, you do not know/cannot help him with this.

You can't love away suicide any more than you can love away a broken arm. The only option within your control is to either take him to the hospital yourself or call the police; they often have someone on staff trained to assess this sort of situation to determine if hospitalization is necessary.

>>18466785
You knew him well until you found out he was going to kill himself. Without even a hint shown on his face

Think about that. If you didn't find that note you still wouldn't know.

>>18466819
Privacy laws. To secretly record him without his knowledge. A better idea would be just to talk to him and say you are going to record the convo. Ofc a doc doing this is much much easier and "trustworth" meaning that the convo will not somehow go on FB and if it did the doc went to med school for nothing cuz of the consequences.

>>18466629
>unhealthy thoughts
Only retards like you think stopping yourself from feeling horrible unending pain is unhealthy

>>18466746
>help
taking him to a doctor is not help
adding to his stress is the opposite of help

>>18466771
>betraying a loved one this hard

i hope you never inflict yourself on another human

>>18466944
Doctors are always stressful regardless of ailment. Doesn't mean we should avoid the office. This is a life-threatening situation...that sure as hell requires medical attention.

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You need to go away with him on vacation. You need to remind him of the small things in life that make it all worth it in the end. Whether it's your beagles howl or your beagle sneezing in your face. Sorry I love beagles ;_;.. your a good person btw best of luck pulling him out of that hole.

>>18466954
>medical attention.
drugging him to the gills had never been the answer to suicide. the only way to stop someone from killing themselves is to remove whatever it is that's making their life so fucking shit

>Oy Vey how dare dis taxpayah think he can Jew me outta my tax dollas OYYYYYYYYYYY

>>18466629
Follow your loved ones.

>>18466959
You seem to have a fundamental misunderstanding of typical drugs prescribed to somebody suicidal. Maybe you were given a medication that did not work--that sucks. But sometimes there is nothing making life shit except biology. That was my case, and after about a month on meds all suicidal thoughts stopped.

>>18466966
Does ur dik still work?

>>18466983
Only the first ten inches of it.

>>18466629
honestly you wrote it all out. He keeps his problems to him self. he doesn't share his pain and internalizes it. That happy guy who seems so positive is wearing a mask. A mask he thinks he has to wear probably from the abuse.

>>18466927
You have no idea where OP is, or if she's even in the united states. She's not going to post it on facebook and if she has any tact at all he'll never know there's a video to begin with. I never suggested she give him the audio file- I specifically said she should show him the video from her device because of how good this guy is at controlling his affect.

http://www.dmlp.org/legal-guide/recording-phone-calls-and-conversations

>>18466949
If you think calling the police on a suicidal loved one who has a plan is "betrayal" you're mentally ill yourself. I've had to do this to an ex before when he started smashing his head on the wall, and he was incredibly angry for a couple days, until he calmed down and thanked me for doing the right thin and even told me he knew how hard it must have been to make that call.

>>18466816
this, basically

>>18466629

Sorry OP, I've got nothing here to offer you.
But my heart goes out to you and your bf....I really hope things work out for the both of you.

>>18466688

What the fuck is your problem?
Did you fail junior gym class and are just angry at the world?

>>18466795
>>18466796
>Enjoy your manslaughter charges
>Enjoy having a dead boyfriend

What the fuck is wrong with you guys. You are terrible at giving advice. I know you tried to help but when someone doesn't take your advice that doesn't mean you should say this shit.

>>18466629
Best thing you can do at this point is convince him to seek medical help. He's already shown that he can mask his pain and plan to off himself without anyone knowing a thing. You found the note before he could go through with any of that. Now you need to help him down the road to recovery WITH MORE THAN YOURSELF. Support him and comfort him but let the professionals do their work.

>>18466629
>>Any suggestions to help him are welcome.
Well you didn't specify what method he was planing to use, but I guess you could buy him a gun. That'd help the process along smoothly.

>>18467160
He didn't say it to wound her, he said it because it's the truth. By not getting him help there's a very good chance he will kill himself and is lying to appease her until she backs off. It's literally a life or death situation, how you don't see that is beyond me.
>>18467187
this

>nobody will ever care about me like this

that guy is so fucking selfish for taking you for granted.

welp i don't see any point in me being alive anymore.

>>18466705
>>>/r9k/

>>18467160
Somebody who refuses to take their actively suicidal SO to the hospital because they "don't want to take that choice away from them" is doing the wrong thing. That's not up for debate, it's objectively wrong, and it's not bad advice to tell them that - in the harshest possible terms if that's what's needed to get the message to sink in.

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Why do people always think they have the right to tell someone else not to kill themselves?

>>18467336
It's a personal thing yeah, but the idiot could have broken up before trying to suicide.
Leaving a note like that is just a cry for attention in a retarded way when he already has a gf.

>>18467336
You don't have the right to just up and kill yourself. Not legally, and not morally (as far as the rest of us are concerned, anyway; I don't really care whether or not you agree, you're outvoted).

I'm actually pro-euthanasia. I think people with painful and untreatable illnesses (for instance) should have the right to end their lives. That's an unfortunate but rational decision, to be made after all other options have been exhausted. It's a very different thing when somebody with clinical depression decides to kill themselves. They're not making a calculated, rational decision, they're acting irrationally, and nobody else has any obligation to stand by and let them do it.

>>18467385
>you don't have the right to choose what to do with your own life

>>18467441

If a person tells someone else not to kill themselves, aren't they just choosing what to do with their own life? Their choice just includes someone else in the equation. What's the difference? What makes you think people DON'T have the right to tell people not to kill themselves?

>>18467451
>why don't I have the right to force my will onto other people?
>aren't YOU just as bad as me for telling me I don't have the right to force you to do things you don't want?

I can't believe there are people out there who actually think like this.

>>18467459

Explain your reasoning instead of hiding. Nobody's forcing anything on anyone. You specifically said:
>Why do people always think they have the right to tell someone else not to kill themselves?

What makes you think people don't have the right to tell anyone anything they want?

Sure, you can kill yourself. I can't stop you. But I can tell you not to.

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You hopeless people are endlessly promoting pills to OP that have a plethora of very negative side effects - and above all else, completely drain the emotional life out of its users. Not only that, you believe that promoting these toxic pills, which OP'S boyfriend could just as well overdose on anyway, is, without a SINGLE doubt, the right thing to do.

You do this because, whether or not you realize it, you pill pushers are all a bunch of COMMUNIST SLAVES. Your governments told you (in exchange for all sorts of pharmaceutical money) that taking this sick, nauseating "medicine" is the right thing to do; and you obey your masters like the medieval SLAVES that you never evolved from.

I came to Canada from Belize when I was 14, and I've spent almost half of my life here. It's crazy to see that Belizeans, despite having a much lower standard of living, are much happier than you - because they don't open their ass for their overlords at every fucking chance they get, and aren't retarded enough to eat pills that have suicide listed as a side effect ON THE FUCKING BOTTLE, unlike you dumb niggers.

This thread reminds me that I don't belong in Canada anymore, and that I should go back home. Seeing you slaves criticize OP simply for not wanting to kill her boyfriend's imagination with "antidepressants". You know, I have all of the things that would make you successful in the modern Western world - the job, women, home and car - but if in Belize I met a girl that had the loyalty and respect that OP is showing to her guy, I'd never come back to soulless Canada (and I think I can).

The rapid decay of the Protestant western world is long overdue. You people are not in touch with nature. Many of you are absolute FREAKS. You think that anything short of mental imprisonment (or physical, be it in a hospital or a jail) for anybody who isn't content with the rapidly decaying quality of life is not enough. The rest of the world will not feel any pity for you when shit hits the fan.

>>18467471
Preach it, brother. Maybe cool it on the civilizational rhetoric, though. The "slaves" to the pharmaceutical people will be outbred by people who aren't completely fucked in the head. Not every westerner is this stupid.

It's the survival of the fittest. He doesn't fit the list. Well i've been in that state before, you're totally fine, and then suddenly when the demon takes control, you are not in control anymore. But there is a way , to get through this - Jesus
AND BY THE WAY DON"T POST EXTREMELY PERSONAL STUFF LIKE THIS TO THE EXTREMELY IMMATURE USERS OF 4CHAN(excluding me) GET YOURSELF OVER TO REDDIT INSTEAD!!!!

do we have shareblue on /adv/ now? there is a lot of samefagging and shilling here today. it's all so tiresome. I fucking hate people so much.

>>18467507
209202020330302% yes

>>18466785
>calm him down
He was calm until you discovered the note, this isn't driven by emotion.
He isn't planning suicide because he's distressed, he's already told you why he's planning on doing it; because he doesn't hold hope for the future.
You talking to him, giving him "lots of kisses and cuddles and talk to him to clam him down" doesn't change that. There's quite clearly a bigger history at play (abusive family, etc.) and you're just not qualified to deal with that.

You "know him well", but you were clueless about the planned suicide until you accidentally stumbled across the note.
This has been avoided by accident, you need to make the most of that accident, and that involves calling the police.

He can be helped, but that help isn't going to be pretty, and that help has to be administered by a professional.

Has your boyfriend ever gone to see a psychiatrist before? Some psychiatrists are more helpful than others. If he has had bad experiences in the past, you might try looking for other doctors in your area, until you find one who is great.

However you confront your boyfriend, try not to make him feel guilty, but tell him how this has made you feel. You can highlight the things that you love about your relationship, how you've come to depend on him, how he is an irreplaceable person in your life, and how his death would affect you. You might try going over the suicide note with him privately and ask him what he meant with certain phrases or sentences. It may help him to open up about his issues or stresses with you.

If he really does come from an abusive family background, one bad enough for him to disconnect permanently (eg. 6 yrs plus...), it's very possible that he has borderline personality disorder, perhaps a more introverted form, or something like it. He may not give off any signs at all, but under the calm surface, he may feel extreme emotions. He may idolize people before debasing them. Little things might make him go from OK to suicidal. I think you should definitely talk with him, tell him how this recent suicide discovery makes you feel, and suggest that you both make an appointment with a psychiatrist, just to see if it helps.

Something serious is obviously going on in his mind. He might be intelligent enough to not show it, to mask it from others, and he might not trust doctors. If you try to hospitalize him, he may act calm and deny everything to medical professionals, and if there is no clear evidence that he has harmed himself or intends to harm himself, they will have no choice but to release him.

Obviously, if you find further evidence, I would call an emergency line and get him hospitalized. As is, I would try to talk with him, and try to get him to commit to seeing a psychiatrist together.

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i am OP's boyfriend

goodbye cruel world

p.s. i hate niggers

FUCK niggers. god DAMN

>>18466629
>Right now, he is laying in my arms after crying himself to sleep.
Oh boy, he's going to get cheated on and then he finally kills himself for real.

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>>18466688
someone is triggered

>>18466629
>Right now, he is laying in my arms after crying himself to sleep. I have never even seen him cry before.
Now that he's shown weakness you need to drop him for a real man OP.

>>18467782
>>18467795
The sad part is that the majority of women would do this.

I think OP'S guy has been trying too hard to keep in some serious demons, felt that he couldn't comfortably do so anymore, and decided that he'd rather kill himself than get cheated on for showing weakness.

Such is life. You should never unconditionally love any woman - only your own children deserve unconditional love.

>>18467817
To add to this, this sounds especially true because he doesn't have any family members to talk to about his feelings, only his gf who would presumably leave if he became soft enough.

That's a tough scenario.

Man I really wish I had a GF that was worried about my suicidal thoughts and plans

>>18467795
>>18467817
>>18467824
Maintaining life and relationships is such a fucking tightrope walk. A tightrope walk where you also have to balance of bunch of spinning plates on sticks.

The instant you start to stumble even a little bit, everything you've been trying to balance all starts to fall over at once and compounds with each other to cause even more falling and before you know it it's all gone from just one little misstep.

Call a fucking ambulence or something and have him taken to hospital. A quick search on google about suicide wuld tel you that ot os at this stage where this shit isn't up to him anymore. If you love him and don't want him to die you will get him to the hospital and get him the treatment he severely needs immediately. No more fucking around this is your boyfriends life.

>>18467385
>you're morally obligated to keep living your shitty life for decades and decades to not make other people sad
nice moral system you got there
>you're outvoted
who gets to vote?

>>18467471
>COMMUNIST
>In exchange for all sorts of pharmaceutical money
what communists did they get this money from?

>>18466687
This. Call a hotline and get advice or from a psychiatrist/Psychologist. I'm so sorry to hear that, you guys sound like you have the life I wish I had with my GF. I had to take her to the hospital after she tried to OD on her heart medication, it was a bad night, but there is help out there, he will be happy, and he has you, you're an amazing woman to care to stand by and help him through this.

>>18466688
Fuck you and your devil trips. You don't deserve to live you absolute shim scum. You are probably an overweight, pathetic, neckbeard who fantasizes about mass killing and paedophilia. Fuck you

I find it so insulting that people here think he needs a psychologist. No OP, you are doing what any good person does. Clearly he tried to repress his emotions leading to deep depression within. Just be there for him, tell him he is safe with you and that he CAN talk. Like you said, you never saw him cry before, I think it just shows how long he's been keeping his sorrow a secret.

The first step to recovery is admitting your problems and asking for help. You sound very mature in handling him, so I think he's in a good place.

>>18467949
retard

>>18467032
>You have no idea where OP is, or if she's even in the united states
Dur, pretty much every country has some form of privacy laws. Whether you're in Saudi Arabia or China, europe or Australia.

>>18466672
There's this saying in the suicide prevention fields "better mad than dead".
Definitely do bring him to the hospital. Though I'd make sure to get the best hospital you can.

I heard th clinic around here is a terrible place to go so I'm reluctant to bring my gf there. However if she were aa serious as your boyfriend I'd definitely bring her there as a last resort.

After reading this whole thread, I can't even begin to explain how retarded OP is. Like, seriously retarded.

>lots of kisses and cuddles and talk to him to clam him down
If you believe you can convince a rational suicider with emotions, you should actuall kill yourself, stupid cunt.

Seriously, you OBVIOUSLY don't know him so stop trying to play the hero, you aint one. AT BEST he will play cool and wait a couple days and weeks, before just killing himself, you mentally challenged piece of trash. He has to talk to someone who knows how to deal with such people, not some pathetically emotional bitch which will rist the life of her bf just to not "hurt him". Reading your shit made me want to vomit into your face.

>>18466845
>>18467471
Just kill yourself man. Why don't you go make an account on ABOVE TOP SECRET. Com and circle jerk your BS over there.

>>18467949
Dunning-Kruger winner of the day right here

>>18468270
Sadly it's not him who gets the Darwin award.

>>18466629
>Even when his father died last year, he was doing his best to show absolutely no negative emotion and put a smile on people's faces.

Major red flag. You should have taken better care of him.

>>18466629
>Boyfriend planned to kill himself
>suicide note that he recently wrote.
>he planned to die on Friday. He said that he felt completely hopeless for the future, and also that he felt worthless because of his family life
>Any suggestions to help him are welcome.

Here's one:
Get him professional help, quick.
You aren't qualified to help him, you can't fix him, he planned to do it, seeming happy doesn't mean he will put it off or get better, that's what people who plan suicide do.
The sooner he gets professional help and works through his problems, the better, telling you isn't going to fix it, especially as you won't understand, will try putting words in his mouth or bring up your own selfish anecdotes.

Source: Part of my job involves looking after people who self harm or intend to commit suicide, if I was dealing with someone with your boyfriend's intentions, suicide note and mental health, he would be put straight into a very safe room with 24 hour dedicated supervision and have very weak blankets that he can't hang himself with.

He isn't going to think about what it will do to you, you aren't delaying it, he planned to kill himself and will do it at said date and time and wanted to leave his problems behind.
GET PROFESSIONAL HELP FOR HIM

I'm the OP.

I woke up to him this morning, and he was calm and collected. We talked some more about his feelings. He says that he was too scared to tell me anything negative, for fear of coming off as weak. Because of his family situation, he says that this left him with nobody to talk to. He says that if he felt comfortable sharing his feelings, he wouldn't have planned a suicide. I guess I understand where he is coming from, but I also feel really betrayed that he took the idea of being "Mr. Perfect" so far that he would have rather killed himself than admit his imperfections to me. He also said that the biggest reason he was "concerned for the future" is because he would have to continue to play the facade if we were to get married and start having children.

I told him that I can forgive him for this on two conditions: if he is open about any negative feelings he has in the future, and if he starts seeing a psychiatrist. He has agreed to both of these conditions, and tomorrow we are going to set an appointment for one. He still refuses the idea of medication - and honestly, I don't have a problem with that. I think he would be miserable on medication.

>>18466629
> I found a suicide note that he recently wrote.

>I immediately confronted him, and he told me everything.

>He said that he felt completely hopeless for the future and also that he felt worthless because of his family life.

How do guys like this even get a girlfriend ?

I actually make an effort to stay positive and talk to (attractive) girls every day.

I get' stood up' on dates and rejected everytime.

And yet you're his girlfriend ?

>>18468559
The psychiatrist is going to prescribe him medication. Why do you think you know what's best for him better than a person who has literally spent a good portion of their life studying mental illness and depression?

>>18468300
>major red flag
By that logic I should kill myself as well.

>>18468632
If you read the OP, you'll realize that her boyfriend really went out of his way to pretend to be happy, for years.

>>18468645
Okay I re-read her post, but don't women see/notice when a guy is faking/pretending to be happy from a "mile" away ?

I see women ignore and reject guys who don't really mean what they say and do all the time.

It's like they have a "detector" when it comes to this stuff.

>>18467949
Recommending him to a psychologist is just as much for her health as it is for his. A professional knows how to take care of a suicidal person. This girl thinks that her loving him is enough to make him want to live, which is going to backfire to her self esteem when she realizes that it ISN'T ENOUGH.
Look at this
>But I also feel really betrayed that he took the idea of being "Mr. Perfect" so far that he would have rather killed himself than admit his imperfections to me
If her response to his pain is to feel betrayed, she obviously has no idea what he is going through. She obviously has no idea what kind of irrational logic depression can put through your head.
Depression is like a monster who's sole purpose is to make you want to die. It will grab onto any stupid reason. She's taking this personally, instead of realizing that his brain chemistry is NOT NORMAL. You CANNOT USE NORMAL LOGIC with depression.

She thinks that making him promise to talk will make him talk. IN FACT that will make him NOT TALK. Because, OP, you have just given his monster ammunition. You've told him that he's done something that requires forgiveness. That means that he fucked up and is a bad person and made you sad and that he should just be done with it and die. That's what the monster will tell him.

He's had a LIFETIME of bottling everything up. It's going to take A LONG TIME for him to unlearn that habit. Which means that he's going to slip up and bottle things up. But you've said that that's not something he's allowed to do. So he has to hide the fact that he's bottled things up. He has to pretend that he isn't bottling it up and that he's fine and there's NOTHING WRONG.

You are making the worst obvious mistakes that one can make when dealing with suicidal people. You don't realize it, but you're alienating him further.

YOU CANNOT DO THIS ALONE. YOU WILL LOSE YOURSELF, OP. YOU WILL LOSE HIM.

>>18468816
My getting emotionally compromised by this situation made me overlook the fact that OP is going to see a psychiatrist. I'm disappointed that they chose a psychiatrist over a psychologist, but whatever gets their foot in the system.

OP, I would suggest that you see a psychologist too.

>>18466672
Imagine how guilty you will feel when he's dead because you didn't take him in for treatment.

>>18467471
Spoken like a true ignorant.
Do you also believe vaccines cause autism?

>>18467817
The sad part is, this 'tough guy facade' is propagated by men and women actually like men who are more in tune with their emotions and sensitive side.

See? I can generalize too.

>>18468816
As someone who has been treated for suicidal depression, OP FUCKING READ THIS

>>18469233
Thanks for the reply. I'm glad that my panicked ramblings were read and appreciated.

>>18467471
>pills that have suicide listed as a side effect ON THE FUCKING BOTTLE,

okay, listen, I know you're trolling, but fuck off. don't scare OP.

OP, it is true that suicide is included in the "side effects listed on the bottle", but there's a reason for that.

think of depression as a deep ocean. in the ocean, there are various layers of light. at the deepest, there is no light. at the top, there's lots of light.

when you get to the deepest layer, that's the part of depression where you stop feeling *anything at all*. nothing can reach you. you have no motivation for anything, you feel nothing, taste nothing.

when you take the pills, it's like someone is pulling you back up to the top. but on the way up, you have to pass all the shit you sunk past on the way down. that means if, before you got all the way down to the numb bottom, you felt suicidal, you will feel it again, because now you can feel. and you have the energy/motivation to do it, because the pills are pulling you back into that area of motivation/energy.

if you can come back to the surface in time, you will be okay. that's why it's important to take the pills regularly, instead of going off/on them whenever you feel bad, instead of doing what the doctor says and taking them on a regiment.

the other anons who are telling you to get your bf help are right.

>>18468559
>I can forgive him on two conditions

That sounds so wrong. Youre gonna make him feel worse that he needs to "apologize" for the way he feels. Whether it hurt you or didn't doesn't fuckig matter, he's the one trying to kill himself, don't play the victim

>>18468559
OP, what the fuck. You'll "forgive him"? Jesus christ.

This isn't about you. His depression isn't about you. His hiding his feelings ISN'T ABOUT YOU.

IT'S NOT ABOUT YOU. HE DOESN'T HAVE ANYTHING, A N Y T H I N G, TO APOLOGIZE FOR.

YOU DON'T NEED TO BE GIVING HIM ULTIMATUMS.

YOU NEED TO GIVE HIM COMPASSION.

Jesus Christ. I talk to my girlfriend about this stuff, I try to be as open as possible, she's understanding and never judges me. Even then, I leave things out, and don't say things because I don't want to be a bother. And that's in the most supportive relationship I've ever had.

I'd be damned if I told her ANYTHING if she implied I had to be FORGIVEN for my fucking illness.

This >>18468816 is absolutely right. YOU ARE NOT QUALIFIED TO FIX HIM. You can't love away his illness.

>She thinks that making him promise to talk will make him talk. IN FACT that will make him NOT TALK. Because, OP, you have just given his monster ammunition. You've told him that he's done something that requires forgiveness. That means that he fucked up and is a bad person and made you sad and that he should just be done with it and die. That's what the monster will tell him.

This, absolutely. You don't understand the way his mind works. Come forward with that. Tell him you DON'T UNDERSTAND, BUT IT'S OKAY.

He needs to be told he is okay more than anything else. Don't judge, don't make this about you. This is about him.

>>18467275
Came here to say this.

I wish I could find a nice /adv/-anon gf.

He seems like the type that thinks his emotions are just in the way..
You need to get him drunk and talk about it. I can guarantee he will spill his guts. He needs to get a lot off his chest and you should be there to tell him the positives.
My boyfriend is like this and I need to pry out what he feels because he won't admit it.
He's still savable, just make sure he feels your support that you'll be with him even if he isn't strong and he can vent to you about real shit.
Love him
Hug him
Make sure he feels appreciated because right now he feels as if he's just a lost cause.

Let me talk to him

This is the most diverse thread i've read in a while, here we have:

>People who are actually trying to help
>Angry virgins from /r9k/
>Trolls from /pol/
>"tfw no gf" betas

really interesting, best luck to you and your bf op.

Man

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>>18469225
>and women actually like men who are more in tune with their emotions and sensitive side.
Do you want me to point you to the 40 year old male feminist virgin?

>>18466629
CALL THE SUICIDE HOTLINE
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H
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>>18468559
>I also feel really betrayed
>I can forgive him for this on two conditions
>I don't have a problem with that (him not taking medicine)
>I think he would be miserable on medication

Honestly, OP? You're a retarded bitch, which thinks it's alll about you and you're risking his life because YOU think that you know better than a person which has studied this shit. You're a horible person, OP, and the worst kind of person you bf could have to hang on. As a suicidal person with shitty upbringing and depression I can tell you that he will try to kill himself if you don't move the fuck away and let someone who know his shit help him. Don't fucking make it about yourself you entitled cunt. Nothing here is about you, you're merely the person hich found the note and you know shit how to handle it.

If you do nothing due to your ego, I hope he makes it an extanded one.

>>18470731
You should get on the bandwagon and kill your self too

>>18466629
How about letting a grown man live his life and end his life as he chooses. It's called freedom. All these fucking morons in this thread calling you to institutionalize him is going to make things WAY fucking worse in his mind.

Think about this... If you wanted to die how fucking angry would you be is someone physically tried to control you. Someone infringed on your rights, someone abolished a basic human right to suicide.

I fucking hate everyone who ever posted anything about stopping someone who wants to kill themselves UNLESS they are trying to harm someone innocent.

Straight up fuck you OP. You are a fucking piece of shit for being so selfish. God damn millennials are the worst at being respectful of others wishes and privacy.

>>18467795
>>18467817

Get back to your containment board, scum

>>18466629
He needs to seek help. Simple as. He booked work off, had he planned how he would do it? He told you his reasons. Just because you stopped him this time doesn't mean he can't do it soon OR that you just being around would stop him.

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OP here again.

This bait thread is still getting very angry replies from depressed losers two days in. I've had a lot of keks, but I would now ask that you stop replying.

I don't think I have ever seen such a successful bait thread in 3 years of using this site.

>>18471010
>haha I just played beig retarded and wasting the time of people which thought a human live hangs on it
That's not bait, that's being scum OP.

>>18470784
I'm a woman, faggot.

Though it's understandable that you may not interact with women enough to realize this.

>>18466629
i dont mean to rude but
did u try
S e X ? ??

I felt exactly like him last year. I was extremely close to killing myself, but then I felt better eventually after a few months with a lot of support from friends.

Just talk to him whenever you can. He'll probably have new anxieties every few minutes, so just make yourself available to him always. With your love, he will heal. Your calmer, more tame perspective on things will be a great help.

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>>18471024
OP here.

This post >>18471010 is just a troll, please ignore it.

>>18472854
Hmmmmm

Nice bait

>>18466771
Wow well this is one way to take a suicidal man and push him off the cliff, are you psychotic or autistic?

OP talk to him and be there for him, try to gently convince him to see a professional, don't make him feel bad or guilty just be understanding.

Hey it really is summertime and the underage edgelords are in full effect.

This thread is ridiculous, OP just talk to him and get him to see a therapist on his own volition.

>>18466785
>give him lots of kisses and cuddles

Do people this dumb exist thinking this can in any way help a person that's so far gone they have their suicide planned out? What world do you live in?

If I was the deppressed person I couldn't care less about your display of affection. I'll assume you've given them before as well and you two have been close and warm to each other, that didn't stop him from spiraling down and coming up with the idea of killing himself, did it?

>>18468085
this all the way thank you for voicing my thoughts, anon. I've been suicidal before too and people like OP make me go mad with rage

>>18468559
>I told him that I can forgive him for this on two conditions:

Lol OP has already lost respect for the bf -- it shows by the fact that OP has gone from affectionate and concerned to demanding and assertive and conditional. The bf failed to maintain face. Life can be cruel sometimes, but if this bf survives, he will realize his mistake in time.

>>18468775
All this proves is that the bf was smarter than OP. I've convincingly faked optimism for long periods of time through multiple relationships. It doesn't really matter how you feel, it matters how you maintain your relationships and reputation and skills. That alone will give you as much power to change what affects your feelings as you are ever likely to get in this world.

>>18466629
I am educated in clinical psychology. Ill be very brief and to the point.

He needs a doctor. Immediately.

That is all you need to know.

Also count yourself lucky you have a chance. A very good friend of mine shot himself in the head while his gf was home. Nobody, not even her knew something was wrong.

>>18466629
He's obviously wanting to do it because he feels alone in his suffering due to always hiding his emotions tell him to tell you everything and just listen and tell him that he should never feel the need to hide his emotions