ITT: Ask the opposite gender anything

Girls: Do you usually have your phones on you all the time or do you take a fair amount of time away from them? Some girls I talk to reply for a fair bit for an hour or so then disappear and I don't want to send follow ups and seem needy.

>>18383243
I have it on me, but I don't really keep an eye on it.

>>18383243
I usually have mine within arm's reach, but it's not like I'm glued to it or anything.

Stupid drama story incoming

So there was this girl I met online who had a boyfriend, but we played vidya together and fell in love, it was on and off until her boyfriend broke up and was generally a dick about it at which point it was off for a while. But the entire time, she has undoubtedly been my best friend and a companion that a person can really only have one of. We got together and stayed together happily until her boyfriend came back crying to her and I backed off for her sake. The fucker gets jealous easily, he has little sense of humor, and is quite an asshole. Hes essentially me, but with more flaws and less personality.

Skip to recently, we're playing vidya again and shes still my best friend, shes still a companion to me, and she lets slip every now and again that the love is still there, but she cant really explain why she cant leave him. He isnt as near as close to her as I am, he DOESN'T sleep with her due to various reasons, and she spends a hell of a lot more time with me than him.

I need her back, but I cant pry too much as to why she cant be with me. I know she'd be happier with me and shes said it multiple times. I think its because hes deep rooted into the family, but I dont understand why I cant be with her instead. Any girls have any idea what might be going through her head, or why she cant just tell him to fuck off?

>>18383248
>>18383249
So out of curiosity, if you see a message has been there for a few hours, would you not bother to reply?

guys, if your male friend was marrying another guy, would you be willing to be the best man or similar?

Just sleeping with another girl on the same bed isn't cheating. Though it's true my boner in the early morning might have poked her a little bit.
Should I tell >muh gf? seems like unnecessary drama
Also if a girl watches me when I sleep it's definitely the boner that caught her eyes right? yeah cant help it

>>18383277
Yeah, if theyre your friend you should respect them enough as a person to at least be there for them at their wedding. Its not like I'd have to kiss the groom or anything.

>>18383260
Depends on what the message is.

>>18383284
Sleeping in the same bed isn't cheating, but it's unacceptable-territory. How would you react if she just slept in the same bed as another guy?

>>18383305
Just a general message really. I've noticed one girl just flat out stop replying if what I've seen is more than one sentence long, I don't understand why.

>>18383311
Give an example, along with context if it's necessary

>>18383277
Sure, though I probably wouldn't book the stripper for the stag night. If someone is friends with a gay guy and good enough friends that he'd be considered worthy of joining the wedding party I don't see why that person would suddenly be repulsed by the idea.

>>18383314
Not him, but I send a message saying "Are you alright?" after they say "Ill brb" and just disappear for a day or so. They get to it about five hours after I sent it saying "yeah why?"

>>18383314
Well I sent some dumb shit, we had a laugh, I asked about her weekend and she mentioned work then asked what I was doing which was something like "Oh how was ---? Nothing today, did stuff yesterday. Tomorrow I'm seeing anon maybe" and then nothing. It happens a lot with her.

>>18383327
By which I mean I sent the message I quoted there. It's like if I write too much about things, she just drops off but I do it so there can be branches to make conversation off.

>>18383324
She was busy. People have things to do other than sit and text.

>>18383327
But she replied eventually, right?

In the end, texting people isn't a sole activity, it's something you do alongside doing other stuff. People get distracted or have to do something else, you should be in the same position.

>>18383340
Nope, nothing. No reply and I never get one until I re-initiate again in a few days. She does this all the time.

Women what the fuck am I supposed to talk to you about.

I don't care about celebrities and don't use social media. Feels like I have nothing in common with the average woman.

Is it possible to get a woman to have kids with me if I don't have a job?

>>18383347
Well I don't know if I'm "the average woman" but I love classic literature, philosophy and history, as well as art house films and vidya. Talk to me about those things. I also don't use social media, except for facebook (to keep in touch with relatives) and steam, and I know nothing of celebrities.

>>18383305
well she should have a good reason. In my case we're on a trip, I just met the other chick the same day, we were exhausted after the games, we stayed at a lodging house, most other guys and girls slept together, it just happened that I found a bed for myself upstairs, then this chick climbed into my bed. We were both too tired to be picky. Though Idk why we woke up at 8 AM in spooning position and I had a boner (nothing to do with her ass). She got up first, I continued to sleep. Then when I woke up later she was sipping smoothie and watching me. Followed by awkward greeting while I tried to conceal my boner.

If I were my gf I wouldnt want to hear these things.

>>18383347
What are you passionate about? What do you do for fun?

>>18383353
Theoretically, yes. But you would probably be a house husband.

>>18383347
From my experience, its just films and TV shows

>>18383354
can I hav you as a gf?

>>18383354
you're the basic special woman starter pack :)
how old are you?

>>18383364
>you're the basic special woman starter pack :)
Huh?
>how old are you?
19

>>18383347
If you can't figure out what to talk to me about, how do you expect to have a relationship with me?

>>18383347
You don't really have to relate to a woman. Women expect you to bring all the interest into their lives.

>>18383374
university?

I dreaded the day my mom sent me fb friend request :)
It's weird and creepy.

>>18383354
I was going to say something along this, too. Film, music, lit, art, history, philosophy. Religion, but only with those who aren't trying to prove anything. Usually end up talking about how I want to live on a farm away from the city.

>>18383383
Gap year, but university soon.

>>18383390
>Gap year

to experience life on 4chin :))))

do you like to become a house wife?
19 is a sweet age for sex hmmm

If a girl keeps making fun of me does she hate me or is she just teasing?

>>18383417
Depends on how she's making fun of you.

>vague questions get vague answers

>>18383421
eat poop

>>18383421
Mostly just making fun of things I do, calling me too sad all the time, one time I posted some pictures of sushi that I made in Discord and she started telling me I did it all wrong.

>>18383405
>do you like to become a house wife?
No.

>>18383425
My, such a witty response, the girl is probably head over heels for your charm and intellect.

>summertime on 4chan

>>18383429
sounds like she's in love with sushi

>>18383250
Women please, I'm so confused

>>18383435
:) I like

>>18383439
I'm not reading your blog post. Give me the gist of it. I'm not going to bother replying if it's a 'what did she mean when she said/did ___?' or something equally stupid though.

>>18383429
I responded to the other anon assuming it was you, my bad.

If she's taking the time to comment on your pictures she's probably just really bad at flirting, but telling a dude he's too sad just sounds bitchy, personally doesn't sound like a girl I'd bother with even if she was just teasing, which she probably is.

>>18383432
what are your top 3 aspirations? from least realistic to most realistic.
how much hair do you have down there? do you shave?

>>18383444
She left me for another guy even though she likes me more in every way and still loves me as if I was her bf. I cant understand any of it

>>18383436
Well I mean... this isn't a real life thing. I met the person online through a game, thought they were a guy at first. We exchanged some stories about our lives and then for a while she (who I still thought was a he at the time) kept making fun of me for different things, usually me being depressed. I thought it was just supposed to be banter because I thought he was a guy but now that I know it's coming from a girl I feel really hurt, like she's just making fun of me because I told her about my depression.

>>18383436
kek

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>>18383444
>>18383449
Also, here you go

>>18383435
Also I'm unsure why thread IDs aren't a fucking standard yet.

Transgirls: When you use Tinder, do label yourself as female or male?

>>18383448
>what are your top 3 aspirations? from least realistic to most realistic.
>writer
>academic or lawyer
>librarian
>how much hair do you have down there? do you shave?
I do if I'm in a relationship.

>>18383468
so how much hair
stop playing with me

you could apply to be a librarian for the local university right now lol
It can be part time work to pay for tuition fee (if your country has tuition fee)

>>18383284

Definitely tell her. Honesty is how you build trust.

Girls

Is it ok to tell a girl you met a short a time ago and who rejected you because of her bf that you think said bf appreciates doesn't her as well as she deserves and think he's using her as a substitute until he found someone who suits him more?

How come girls generally aren't interested in younger guys, even if the guy is literally only a year or two younger? Is this just a misconception I got in my head somewhere along the way?

>>18383495
Women are in general, more attracted to older guys. Older guys are more mature, they tend to know their place in life and have stable careers.

Guys are in general more attracted to younger women because they're more physically attractive and they're better for having children with for a few reasons.

Just a little basic evolutionary psychology.

Are just regular dicks attractive?
What are the aspects of a guy that women actually find hot?

>>18383507
>Are just regular dicks attractive?
I don't find dicks attractive
>What are the aspects of a guy that women actually find hot?
Hair, eyes, face, then shoulders and stuff. I'm not super into muscles. It's mainly in the face, for me.

>>18383454
P-pls respond.

>>18383508
>replying to dick question in this kind of thread

now you've done it

>>18383511
>implying girls cant bant

>>18383511
Quit being a pussy? A girl you've never met shat on an aspect of your personality. That's good, it means she cares about you. If she didn't, she wouldn't have actually said anything and probably wouldve given you a verbal Pat on the back.

>>18383520
I have lots of people shitting on me. It'd be nice to have someone in my corner for once. I can't even trust my Dad or my brother to be there for me anymore.

>>18383522
You should reach a point where you don't need anyone "in your corner" but it honestly doesn't matter what I say because if you actually wanted to get out of your depression you would've done it already.

>>18383522
She IS in your corner. Just like they said, if weren't, there would be not banter. Literally just stop being a pussy and understand that just because they arent pampering you with kind words doesn't mean they dont care

>>18383518
>getting bant from girl
>reply with my own
>she gets really pissed

yeah, no, girls can't bant

Is there a timeframe for asking girls out that you hang out with in a social group? Like after a certain point is it better to not say anything?

>>18383573
Social things like that are gauged by feeling. None of it can be calculated

>>18383573
It's not that you shouldn't ask them out, per se, it's more that you shouldn't ask them out if you don't have any reason to think they're also interested in you.

>>18383560
why generalize so broadly when there's no reason to? just because one cant doesnt mean all cant

>>18383560
It's no one's fault but your own that you chose such a moody cow for a girlfriend.

>>18383575
Um so what kind of feeling are we tallking about?
>>18383577
Let's pretend I'm socially retarded how would I have an idea that they are also interested?

>>18383586
>Let's pretend I'm socially retarded how would I have an idea that they are also interested?
You post a thread here listing all of her behaviour which gets ignored because how the fuck are we supposed to know and you never end up asking her out and dying alone.

>>18383589
Well that is fair.

>>18383586
>I'm socially retarded
step one work on your self esteem issues

>>18383586
Lol social autism is strong with this one. Social interaction isn't something that can be quantifiable. You do what you want to do , you talk to her when you want to talk to her, not out of needyness but out of geniune interest. If you wanna do it, do it

>>18383464
on /adv/ they definitely should. hard to keep track of people here, especially the original asker of a question
id definitely shitpost a lot less though

Girls, how do you decide the other person you're meeting isnt a creep?

Context: meeting female cosplayers irl, sometimes my etiquette suffers from anxiety.

I really like this girl but she's moving to another country next year. It's what's stopping me from going after her. Should I still go for it?

>>18383605
I've been trying and failing.
>>18383611
I can talk to her I just don't know if I should even try asking her out since in similar situations I've been rejected and just end up being a distant friend while they end up dating someone else.

>>18383621
>I've been trying and failing.
You've come this far and that should be an indication that you have ability and will grow with time and effort.

>>18383621
Well thats just another problem with women entirely. Pick up "The Game" By Neil Strauss

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>>18383619

>>18383643
While I don't disagree with her words it's a shame she herself is such a horseface.

>>18383643
She might have Down syndrome but maybe that's why she's honest.

>>18383643
that's just begs the question

>>18383243
Most of the day, I don't know where it is.

>>18383619
Other than what >>18383643 said, which is true, I think it's mostly your attitude.
If you are uncomfortable with what you are doing, nervous and excessively close/clingy/pushy.

>>18383676
not OP, I used to constantly touch my face and neck when I first met this girl. My guy friends think I look like an idiot. I don't think I appeared confident in the slightest. But she actually made an effort to date me, is this some kind of red flag/weirdo? So far how accommodating this chick is, even when I acted like a creep on purpose is suspicious (leering at her body, whispering lewd things, talking about her underwear, talking about jerking off etc.) if you have creepy stuffs feel free to add in I would like to try them, see how far I can go.

>>18383705
Some girls like guys who are forward with what they want. I like you are shaming this girl for her preference.

>>18383277
I'm not friends with gay guys

>>18383823
what? not shaming, I just like to tease her a bit, see the look on her face when she's uncomfortable/grossed out and then I would like to lift her skirt up and fuck her. So far she is too smiley and nice it's weird. Shit I think I might have a fetish.

>>18383619
If you're nice, respectful and don't lack social skills, then you're not a creep. A guy becomes a creep when he acts inappropriately.

>>18383850
We both know full well if some neck beard wizard was nice to you, you'd still find him creepy based on appearance.

>>18383855
Actually no. I have a friend who looks like a neckbeard but otherwise acts normal, and I have no problem with him. On the other hand, there's a guy I work with who is a pretty normal looking guy who has made inappropriate comments in the past, and he makes me uncomfortable.

Women:

what makes you sexually attracted to someone?

What makes you sexually attracted to years ur partner?

>>18383871
Still, neckbeard stranger vs normal looking stranger, which one will you assume is a lot less weird on first sight?

Yeah, thought so.

>>18383876
I was the one who approached my neckbeard-looking friend first. We met on the train, I had seen him around in classes and had noticed we had mutual friends so I thought I should introduce myself so I struck up conversation.

But go ahead, by all means, make further assumptions about me. I bet you think I'm some desperate landwhale or something too. I'm not going to apologise if my behaviour doesn't fit your worldview.

>>18383876
Neckbeard offended. Not that person, but why do men always say this when they treat fat and ugly women the same? You have the same reaction. It's natural. You think the skinny, pretty one is better at first sight.

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>>18383508
>Hair

>>18383873
>what makes you sexually attracted to someone?
Well - looking good is a big one.
Other than that, a feeling of comfort and openness, mixed with some lighthearted, funny teasing and banter, mixed with flirting.

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Hey guys, I'm embarrassed and that's the gist of it.

The dude has glanced at all the time in past classes...and there's another dude that usually stares at me and smiles. I assumed both of them were just lowkey judging me or something. The glancer intimidates me because his brief looks are just more...I don't know. Predatorial and less benign.
...honestly thought the little make-up I had on was fucked up or something and it made me feel self-conscious, which is bad. I blush when I get self-conscious.

But...what I didn't expect was to finally look at him after all these weeks, and see him bite his lip, yet not look away and stare me down. My stomach and heart flipped in sync. Honestly, what? What is that? And I remember having to get up and him just carefully but aggressively looking at me. I had looked away by then but...honestly, it was still clear what he was doing.

So yeah. I've been thinking stuff like...
>oh, wow, he must have put on a bet with his friend or something to see who can fuck around with me
even if it's stupid as fuck. How can a guy be so...forward? He can't be trying to seduce me, right? Is that a thing guys actually do? What the fuck? This is totally out of my depth and can't be happening to me of all girls...

I think of myself as a 1/10 that can't possibly be attractive. A kissless forever virgin who just got a little fitter. The attention just seems so wrong and I feel like there's some sort of joke going on here...I don't know. What do you guys think?
I'm asking half-way because I feel kind of scared to go to class now...I'm just so afraid of the attention or of saying something stupid now. I don't even know why.

>>18383935
It could be a joke femanon some guys think it's funny. Ignore him and go on with your day.

>>18383940
Damn, that's messed up but point taken. I thought it was unusually stupid when he walked by and said "sup" in a deep voice.

At least he hasn't laughed yet--means that I probably haven't reacted in the way he wanted me to.

>>18383952
Are you in highschool or college? Because if you are in highschool, this is normal behavior for boys of that age.

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>>18383243
Text less and ask them on dates more. Simple as that.

>>18383250
That isnt love. Forget about her and see pic related. Maybe keep her as friend, but for gods sake, FIND REAL GF! You know the one you can fuck and hold hands with.

>>18383277
Yes. I am not homophobe.

>>18383284
Sleeping in same bed is very edgy. True gentelman would sleep on floor in different room to not risk urges to cheat in his gf.

>>18383347
Family, job, life goals, nunber of children, personality and
https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/open-gently/201310/36-questions-bring-you-closer-together

>>18383353
You just have to ejaculate in her pussy on her fertile day. No job involved.
>will she be ok with it?
That is entirely different question.

>>18383417
She wants your D. Ask her on date. And buy condoms.

>>18383465
>>>/lgbt/
to what have i read, they hide it to evade trans chasers and to get at least some swipes (because novody wants mental issues really)

>>18383489
That is absolute retarded. Once girl denies you, cut her out from your life like a tumor. Have some self respect boy. Also you have to be 18 to be here.

>>18383495
Young guys have 0 social status and cant even eat pussy properly. 30 is the age.

>>18383511
Drop the bitch. Find real gf.

>>18383573
Ask them on date asap in private settings. Get her phone number first. If she rejects you, pretend nothing happened.

>>18383464
Just fill some name to keep your identity for the thread.

>>18383619
You are creep if you arent attractive enough for the girl. Chad will never be creep no matter what he will do. Good luck in dating game!

>>18383620
Yes, you live only once. Buy condoms.

>>18383873
Try asking better questions like
>i am dude with this and that
>what should i do to attract more ladies?
This leads nowhere.

>>18383935
Chat him up and give him your phone number. Buy condoms and even if he cum and dump you, it will be valuable life experience for you. Demand him to eat your pussy first.

>>18383965
i love you anon you give the best advice

>>18383958
College. And now I'm paranoid the one time I saw him whisper to his friend after looking at me that they were just making fun of me...god damn it. Back then I was barely conscious of him so I thought nothing of it.

>>18383965
...And just as soon as you posted my roommate randomly had a sex talk with me with what she learned in one of her silly psych classes. Nice timing. But why me, what the fuck?

Anyway, if I could turn back time I'd definitely try fucking him...my sex drive has gone out of control ever since I lost weight. Shame that he's probably just fucking around with me.

>>18383985
You're never going to get anywhere with anyone if you have this defeatist attitude all the time.

>>18383985
>>18383985
if you lost weight he thinks you look good. no one here knows his intentions, femanon, but dont rush into sex whatever happens between you two

>>18383985
>turn back time
Silly girl. Boys are simple. If you want to fuck him, just really go to him the next opportunity you will get and chat him up. Exchange phone numbers and maybe ask him to "study" with you.

Some people in unis fuck like rabbits given the chance. You wont even be called whore, if you keep fucking tje same dude. Just really buy condoms and be responsible a bit.

Good luck.

>>18384010
I don't suggest she lose her virginity like this. Sexual liberty like this is why women have become promiscuous. Don't listen to this guy.

Give your virginity to me instead.

>>18384044
>have become
Unless you are talking about the situation compared to the fifties, young people (men and women) are actually having less sex than they used to.

http://www.latimes.com/opinion/opinion-la/la-ol-millennials-less-sex-20160802-snap-story.html

>>18384010
Guys in uni/college are extremely cautious now because of fake accusations. Going straight at it is risky, I'd turn down a girl if she straight out came onto me like that.

>>18384070
>Guys in uni/college are extremely cautious now because of fake accusations.
The US, not even once. Though I honestly doubt your average fratguy is concerned with this shit even there.

>>18384080
well they are targets of most rape accusation so

>>18384091
False rape claims are like plane crashes. They are daunting and when it happens it gets lots of coverage. They are also rare and VERY rarely involve "normal" people just out to bait someone.

Read up on it here: https://qz.com/980766/the-truth-about-false-rape-accusations/
Sure the article sets out to show that false rape claims aren't that common and don't come out of the blue, but it's packed with legitimate studies for proof.

A normal woman is not going to walk up to a guy, ask him for sex, then turn around and say he raped her. That is level 9000 mentally disturbed.

>>18384070
If you would shoo away girl which talked to you, smiled and invited you to have food with her or something, then you are definitely not boy enough.

Google estrogen in water and estrogen like chemicals from plastic and how to get naturally more testosterone.

And most rape cases happens when the boy behaves like jerk to girl after the sex. If you are nice person and dont call her whore 5 minutes after cum and post her nudes online, nobody will call you rapist.

Stop letting feminazis scaring you away from girls. Behave like gentelman and you will be fine.

>>18384098
I bet you're single. You're not the ideal man.

>>18384111
Why would you propose to her (assuming here since girls rarely do) if you didn't mean it? You don't love her if you're even making accounts in the first place. Why do you want to do this? Is not attractive? Not giving enough sex? I mean, this happens often if you had few sexual partners before her, so it's normal but not necessarily okay. Seek help or lose this girl. Your choice.

>>18384098
>Behave like gentelman

Woman detected.
This is not good advice.

>And most rape cases happens when the boy behaves like jerk to girl after the sex. If you are nice person and dont call her whore 5 minutes after cum and post her nudes online, nobody will call you rapist.

Yes, don't be a jerk. But don't be a gentleman either. It's outdated.
Be selfish and protect yourself, try to do so without being a jerk.

>If you would shoo away girl which talked to you, smiled and invited you to have food with her or something, then you are definitely not boy enough.

I don't give a fuck about being "boy enough". I give a fuck about covering my own ass, and a girl doing all that shit, is suspicious as fuck. I'd be hesitant.

>>18384126
>and a girl doing all that shit, is suspicious as fuck.
Men lurking ITT who have asked themselves or the internet why women aren't just straightforward about wanting sex, please take note.

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>>18384126
>woman detected
>not good advice
>its outdated

I'm starting to hate women because of the games they play and for men getting shafted in almost every aspect of society. How to I stop being resentful?

>>18384131
That's just one guy thinking that.
And women are just cowards in general not because they think that girls who approach men are suspicious.

>>18384167
>I'm starting to hate women because of the games they play and for men getting shafted in almost every aspect of society. How to I stop being resentful?
I think that the best way to stop hating a group of people is to get to know them.
Try getting to know more women with an open mind.

>>18384167
Ask yourself what you would tell a woman who says she's starting to hate men for the crimes they commit or whatever.

You have to realize that no woman cares if you wind up hating woman. You are the only one having to deal with your bitterness and anger, which is unpleasant enough even disregarding your dating prospects.

Literally more than half of mankind is women. That's A LOT of people, more than you will ever meet, more than you can even imagine really. They do not exactly have a single personality or disposition. And if you want to point out some patterns, the same can be said about men, eg men being more aggressive and having less self control. That you can draw those conclusions when looking at hundreds of thousands of people (let alone millions) does not mean much for picking a random person. And in comparison to all the people out there, you will only ever get to know a handful, let alone looking at the women that might be dear to you.

>>18384098
>And most rape cases happens when the boy behaves like jerk to girl after the sex.
Most are "I regretted it" actually. I knew a girl who decided she regretted all the times they slept together and pulled that shit, it happens a lot.

>>18384170
There's also men who find it slutty/vulgar for a woman to be straightforward about these things, or do not think of false rape claims as much as it being a joke or whatever.

Yes putting yourself out there is scary and women can comfortably avoid it. Most of the men on here cannot and they still don't ask women out, so you can imagine if they had the possibility to sit back and let the girls come to them. That's the female situation. But on top of that it's not as universal as guys tend to think that every guy is dreaming of a woman approaching him out of nowhere.

>>18384176
Read the actual sources we have before coming with stuff like this.

https://qz.com/980766/the-truth-about-false-rape-accusations/

>>18384167
That feminazi from the last thread has made me afraid that all women are lunatics. I know most women are normal but just the fact that someone can be so mental as to want to eradicate men is just insane.
Again I know all women aren't like that but still, it's just that she's not the only crazy one that's out there with thoughts like that.

>>18384167
Don't hate women, but understand their limits. In my experience once you get rid of the whole "we're the social justice generation, I can totally talk to this girl like we're equals" and take the dominant male role in conversation, relationships, sex, women will respect you more.

>>18384191
Dude, do you realize that as a woman, there are entire communities dedicated to hating women and sharing tips on how to effectively use them? How much more likely a woman is to be raped or killed by a man than the other way around? I bet you there is someone on r9k saying every woman should be killed in some thread right as we speak.

And you see a single woman spouting this crap and it shakes your faith?
Sure it's scary, sure it's no fun being exposed to those thoughts but it goes both ways and we all have to make do with one another.

>>18384206
It still seems like lately there's been more exposure of the feminazi view than others.
Though I'd never heard of women hating women and having tips on how to use them, what the fuck is that all about?

Ladies, what makes you fuck over your boyfriend like this >>18383416 ?

>>18384213
>It still seems like lately there's been more exposure of the feminazi view than others.
r9k has been around for years, and the MGTOW movement even longer....you see one feminazi post and you think its an army of them? dude. men use practice gfs all the time, how long have you been on 4chan for?

i know a few girls irl that claim to be feminists but i know they would not try to kill me. most are just passive and protest for men to stop raping and taking advantage of women, and 70% of it is fat positivity and self love

>>18384213
I've been here for five+ years and the way I see it, there's simply more and more female users and also more acceptance of them. I think if anything that's what makes it more visible. I mean yeah, there's batshit insane women, this just didn't used to be their go to spot and still largely isn't - think tumblr and no doubt other sites by now.

I didn't mean that they are run by women, I meant that from the opposite perspective, you already have to accept that there are many men around who at best think you're inferior but cute, like a pet, and at worst think you should all die in a fire. There is no way around that. Sure this is 4chan, but on reddit there's the red pill, and there's many communities like those of Roosh (returnofkings) that propagate against seeing women as human beings.

Again it is an ugly part and honestly if at all possible I think it is best to avoid coming into contact with those places to begin with. It adds nothing to your life, it draws a specific crowd that has little to do with the people that happen to be around you in everyday life, and it plants a seed of doubt that is hard to eradicate.
We need each other. Women and men ultimately appreciate and want each other, regardless of differences or hostility also present. Nothing is achieved by focusing on the negative. Easier said than done, I know.

I was just joking around with this female friend and she told me to feel her heartbeat (obvious sexual move), so naturally I groped the shit out of her tits and moved my hand between her legs but she seemed surprised? we ended up kissing and she let me finger her for about fifteen minutes to orgasm, she was shaking and tried to push my hand away from her crotch, then told me she had to go (that's not nice). The next day she acted cold and gave me weird look when I talked to another girl, and our hands touched when I was handing her the assignment, she dropped it. She seemed averse to my touch now, wtf? Can't we just go back to being friends? after all I did her a favor.

>>18384222
>five+ years
Shit, now that I think about it, it's more like seven+.

Jesus. Get away while you still can.

>>18384222
Women and men need each other for different reasons. There's no reason that going back to a patriarchal society can make those needs unfulfilled.

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>>18384220

>>18384230
What's so different about it? Are you one of those "men have no feelings, women no sex drive"?

>back to whatever
There's only the present and the future. The world looked different back then. There is no way to erase what happened in the meantime.

>>18384236
The future does not exclude returning back to the ideas of the past.

Girls:
If a guy whom you rejected and made clear wanted to go out with you cut all contact with you and would act like you don't exist (you're classmates), how would you feel?
Also, how would you feel if he said hi after many months of basically not acknowledging your existence?

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>>18384222
>We need each other. Women and men ultimately appreciate and want each other, regardless of differences or hostility also present.
That makes me feel more comfy. Luckily I haven't encountered lunatics from either side irl and I hope I never do.

>>18384240
It isn't just a singular idea that can be incorporated in a new setting. It's an entire way for society to be structured. What do you plan on doing, telling generations of women who apply themselves more than men in schooling and are better educated that tough shit, because biologically they get pregnant they have to let go of that silly idea of having a career? How do you see that working out realistically speaking?

>>18384230
There is - not all women want to have that role in society, not all men want to have that role in society.
I agree that we took things too far in certain ways, but disregarding the needs of a whole bunch of people is silly.

>>18384221
The reason men use practice gfs is because no girl wants a guy who doesn't even know how to unhook a bra or kiss properly. I think all guys ideally would love a loyal gf to spend his whole life with, but the reality is very different from that.

>>18384244
Assuming we weren't really friends and this was the most significant interaction we had, I would've felt uncomfortable with it when I was younger, like you were probably angry or thought I was a bitch, I would retrace all my steps wondering if I did something wrong or could've been nicer about it etc.
As of now (24) it would just be a bleep on my radar, I would assume that you felt uncomfortable or embarrassed and keep my distance in kind. Once you said hi I'd happily reciprocate.

>>18384258
Well, we talked nicely and were kinda hitting it off but then it went to shit when I asked her out multiple times and she said no (I thought she was being hard to get, so I pushed and pushed) to the point she wouldnt return my messages and then we met randomly a few cms from eachother in the shopping, going up the automatic stairs I said hi, she said nothing so I just turned my back, unfriended, trying to readd of FB, she declined...And we still saw eachother in class many times, but I always made sure not to look at her, since I felt uncomfortable and there would be no point to it, she would just thinking it was harassment or something.

>>18384213
>tips how to use them
Mgtow
Pick up artist
>hating
Practically half of r9k

>>18384220
When you bring up cuck fetish into your relationship, you sort of throw it into bin yoursrlf. Even femdom have its female fans, but cuck fetish brings 3rd party to your relationship and majority still want monogamy.

>>18384223
You sort of behave like manslut. Either apologize to her and ask her on date and upgrade this to proper relationship or leave her be. Some girls are so submissive they are sort of unable to say STOP once you have your hand in ther panties, but it doesnt change the fact that you were forceful and maybe now she thinks less of her thanks to you.

Apologize and ask het on date or leave her be.

>>18384232
I agree some of us are super stupid and i am sorry for all girls who will have to put up with such bullshit. The meme
>manchild
is fucking real. Our culture is party responsible for this, when as a boy, you are supposted to lose virginity before 15 and fuck as many sluts as possible.

>>18384244
Stop overthinking nonsence and keep ignoring her.

>>18384248
I feel the same about girls. We all gonna make it.

>>18384251
Imagine future where man are no longer and only lesbians are born thanks to eugenics and crispr.
https://phys.org/news/2016-04-scientists-skin-cells-human-sperm.html

Imagine future where girls are totally obsolete and no longer needed.
https://www.theverge.com/2017/4/25/15421734/artificial-womb-fetus-biobag-uterus-lamb-sheep-birth-premie-preterm-infant

And now tell ne which future is more sad and scary. Personally i wouldnt want to see all girls go extinct / obsolete or passed laws about banning new boys to be born.

>>18384255
Practice gf is very ugly idea on itself, but since your 1st relationship almost never work, almost everybody had the practice girl at some point.

>>18384232
>manlets
>men
Nice try, though.

>>18384258
>Once you said hi I'd happily reciprocate.
And give him hope again. Fucking women.

>>18384268
>I pushed and pushed
>I said hi, she said nothing, so I just turned my back, unfriended

Yeah this is unfortunate. You no doubt left a bad impression on her. Did you start greeting her again? If you are only going to see her until the end of the school year, I would honestly just keep not acknowledging her at this point.

>>18384278
If me acknowledging someone's existence makes them think I want to fuck, that's not my responsibility.

>>18384269
>And now tell ne which future is more sad and scary.
Effectively reducing a huge source of the diversity of people and a recurring theme throughout human history and the general human narrative is a horrifying thing to me. Choosing between no men or no women to me is like picking the left or right half of the Earth to be shot to ashes, or like choosing to keep your left or right leg.

>>18383221
Questions for the grills, What way do you like getting approached when at a bar or a club or just out drinking?

I have trouble approaching people, like the very first part. Lets say I'm at a club on the dance floor, see a hot girl, do I just go up and say "hi"? or is that weird?

>>18384269
>And now tell ne which future is more sad and scary
Both sound pretty shit. The fact is most people are heterosexual and going prison gay can handle only so much.

For both genders actually.
What is the thing that made you think "she/he's the one"?

>>18384303
Say "hi" and comment on the music, the place, the drink, whatever to get a discussion going.

>>18384303
I don't care about how you approach me, as long as you
>are not swaying on your feet level drunk
>approach me from person to person to talk/flirt/dance and not try a gimmick on me - so no pick up lines or whatever, those set the precedent for a type of interaction you don't actually want
>you take my cue when I don't feel like talking

If I do want to talk it's because I feel like talking, and/or I find you sympathetic from the first impression, and/or the conversation itself is easy going and pleasant. It has nothing to do with any perfect intro or something.

>>18383619
OP here, just went to a con, and I met this male cosplayer looking very sketchy, but dont know what makes he looks like so. I don't want to be one.
>>18383705
That girl sure have must suffered a hit somewhere in her head, most girl I knew will make an effort to avoid such man

>>18384291
I did not and have seen her and her friends staring at me every single chance we were in the same vicinity and hard stares (which I always ignored and never reciprocated) everytime I passed them in class to go to my seat . And we're all in college.

>>18384305
She gave me boner. Her smile was enough for me to forget how to talk and walk. Too bad our life goals were totally incompatible (house and children VS travelling abroad and wasting her heritage money). Let the fate be kind to that carefree whore :-)

>>18384314
Well, everyone fucks up but you have to realize that to her friends you are the guy who did not take her seriously when she told you no, multiple times, until the point where she alienated you because you did not get the message, and then you went full high school drama over that in turn.
It is not surprising really that they're no fans of yours. You essentially have two options: either you reach out to her and tell her you regret the way you handled it and you want her to know that, then start greeting her pointedly. Or you can accept that you fucked this one up, you made a bad impression and there's some hostility accordingly. Yeah it's uncomfortable but no one goes through life only making friends.

>>18384315
she chose traveling over having children? wew

>>18384307
>>18384308
What if you're with a group of friends? Would it not be strange if I just butted into the group to talk to a single girl?

It's strange, I have no problem approaching and talking to girls in literally any other setting

>>18384321
Yeah sure, if it's completely out of the blue. That's why you throw her a smile first, make eye contact and see if she holds it. If she shows interest (smiling back, getting flustered, staring at you or instantly looking away shyly), you do it once or twice more then make your way over there when you feel you've let enough momentum build.

>>18384317
I sent her a message a long time ago with that, pretty much and she did not reply. It's over and done with and really doesn't seem to be a point in ackowledging her existence.
i reached out, told her that I harassed her when I shouldve taken the hint and said I was sorry (that's the basic idea, anyway) and she didn't even say k. So it's insane to feel awful about alienating a chick I, for all intents and purposes, don't know and hates me.

>>18384323
Hmmm that is solid advice, it was exactly what I was looking for, thanks

>>18384325
Then you did what you could reasonably do. No way to go back in time. If I were you I'd try to find a middle ground. Like not happily smiling and giving a cheery hi when you see her, but also not avoiding eye contact in a setting where it is very unnatural to not have it at all. Distant but cordial. If she responds you can work your way up to greeting terms.
If not, see it as a lesson learned and try to find some closure for yourself.

>>18384326
No problem at all. If you're lucky her friends catch on and point it out ("ohh look that guy there is looking at you") which only builds excitement. Good luck!

>>18384327
I think I got all the closure I need when we were literally face to face, I said hi and she said nothing.

what can you do to make conversations with girls interesting? I've always had a struggle to find an interesting topic, and mostly I'm the one that stops texting back because it would look weird to force it not to end

>>18384332
Doesn't really sound like it when you are still actively thinking about it and wondering how to handle the situation.

Also people are not machines. It is rude and embarrassing to not acknowledge someone to their face, but it was the outcome of what happened between the two of you. It's not really surprising that if you treat someone disrespectfully that is going to impact how they treat you in turn.

>>18384337
Things you have in common (interests, hobbies, school, people you know, whatever), interesting memories/anecdotes, random banter, your day, her day. Just like with guys.

>>18384337
Texting in general is a shitty medium for real quality conversation. In my opinion it's best to limit texting to practical things (did you get home safe? is tomorrow still on?), fluff (a cute picture you came across, a good night text) and sexting if you're into that. For real talk there's conversations face to face.

As for what to talk about, people most like to talk about their dreams/goals, the human relations in their life (ask about their childhood and the kind of family they come from), and the things you have in common (like bonding over professor anecdotes, or sharing a hatred for something or someone).

Once you know each other well enough to know what interests the other, asking questions about their work/hobby/study is good, as is focusing on shared interests. If you have a good enough connection you can talk about virtually anything and make it interesting because you can link the most mundane observations to your outlook on life.

Is heartbreak the worst feeling? Do you feel it physically like in your chest?
Plz state gender.

>>18384350
>Is heartbreak the worst feeling?
No.

>Do you feel it physically like in your chest?
Yes. I felt like suffocating for days.

Female.

>>18384340
Oh it's not so much actively thinking but the stares kinda creep me out. I have accepted the loss long ago and try to ignore her existence but them stares. They could return to courtesy and act like I don't exist.

>>18384354
They absolutely could, but you have no control over other people and sometimes just have to deal with their attitude. Especially when they aren't actively doing anything you could reasonably call them out on.

>>18384350
Yes, but it's not the heartbreak itself but the emotional responses that come with it. The depression, anxiety to try again, self doubt, insecurities, and memories that haunt you. You have to be very in love to experience this. If you breakup with a short term partner, you will not feel the same pain as you would with a long term one. I have felt it strong enough in my chest, almost like my heart was pierced.

>>18384310
yeah I hit her head
with my dick
lmao
I really appreciate her being nice to me and all but now it seems she's a bit of a weirdo

How would you react if your crush told you about her ex bf not being good in bed?

>>18384390
I'd act like it's usual because it is usual

Or I would let her know my ex is better in bed than her

>>18384223
m8, you molested her. Be glad you're not in jail

>>18384396
Even if you never had sex with her?

>>18384213
You feel. Men have been misogynists since the dawn of time and you are threatened by a fairly new movement called feminism. You're weak
>>18384248
Sleep with one eye open :)

>>18384415
then she isn't my crush :)

>>18384396
>>18384423
How come it's usual though?
I know, i'm naive

And I don't get what could be wrong with telling such thing about an ex desu

>>18384417
>muh soggy knees
come on now, drop the misandry.
i love how feminists are so oblivious to the truth, they're becoming the monsters they want to fight: people who discriminate by gender.

>>18384427
I was just fucking with you :)
what's your question again? I need more details

>>18384417
To be clear, it's not the threat of women, it's the threat of men who enable them.

>>18384390
Oh great, if I date him he'll share my intimate information with everyone.

I thought I was flirting with a girl on facebook (she was sending me hearts, and selfies of her lying in bed etc), so yesterday I confessed my interest for her.
Then she got mad saying it was all a joke and unfriended me from facebook.
This morning she logged back in and says we should forget the whole thing and invited me for coffee with her sister.

WTF is going on here /adv/ ?

>>18384455
>WTF is going on here /adv/
you made up an ok story. In this story the sister likes the main character but I'm sure you need anons to tell you that.

>>18384437
But I didn't share it with "everyone". But with someone I trust and I feel comfortable with.
Maybe it was childish and immature, but I don't see it as something really wrong

>>18384468
I wouldn't take it so hard.
first of all, it's not really significant. It may be seen as a bad sign of you talking behind other people's backs, but it also can be viewed as a compliment once you finally fuck and you tell them they are so much better.
Finally, it seems like a normal part of the response about his physical traits

all in all, I wouldn't care. (Unless I felt insecure about being competent in sex myself)

>>18384455
maybe it was some kind of a very reatrded test
And if so, you failed it

>>18384428
>they're becoming the monsters they want to fight
nah, it doesn't work that way.
The feminazis hate men from the beginning and just piggyback on feminist philosophy to be viewed as reasonable, oppressed and cool.

The feminists themselves are just normal, calm people, wanting nothing over equality

>>18384350
guy
The worst I ever felt was when I thought I messed up my chances with one girl (with whom I was just flirting/dating at that time). Partly because she manipulated me emotionally, very badly too.

When I was left alone/cheated on I felt more depressed (that is - emptiness, nothing at all), than bad.

but being a cognitive science student I can assure you, you indeed feel it physically.

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Please talk me out of making a move on a close friend of mine.

Guys: there's no chance he likes me still, is there?
>met a few weeks ago go out for a drink etc, we hang out and he says how glad he is we met
>go out three or so more times, sleep together etc. He uses some phrases like 'I like you 10/10' and 'it's so cool to meet someone on the same page' and 'I can't believe I met you', 'can't believe you're into me' etc
>all going cool until yesterday. I asked him something personal (ish) and he was like can we hold off on emotional talk. this is all going a bit fast etc.
>then I'm like let's clarify what we're doing here, are you sleeping with other people etc. He says he hasn't been with anyone in over a year but doesn't know if he can commit to anything long term
>I say I didn't say anything about long term, just let's hang out and stay optimistic, if some obstacle comes along we can end it then but there's no reason to end it now.
>he says he doesn't know but it's too fast and he has 'stuff he never got closure on' from legit years ago, and that relationships hadn't been on his radar.
>I said well I'm not looking for a casual sex thing so let's call it a day
>he says 'can we please go to the pub and be together as people'
>umm no thanks
>'but it's so rare to meet someone on the same page about things and life' and he's legit tearing up now that I don't want to be mates with him
>I don't just want to be friends, I like you
>well, I'll still see you at X (where we met) sometimes right?
>I hope not tbqh
>he's looking sad, I'm feeling sad
>then I kiss him and say 'just... change your mind. There's more joy to be had from this before it blows up in our faces I'm sure'
>yes, okay, yes
>we sleep together
>afterwards I'm being catty af to try and seem like I'm not hurt and don't care that much
>see you friday at X then
>yeah whatever I don't even care, I say
>then he leaves my place.
>under one minute later, knock at the door
>'I forgot to say goodbye properly' and gives me a romantic af kiss and says see your friday

>>18384537
>like I'm not hurt
why the fuck should you be hurt in this situation?

And why would you treat him like shit, especially after you broke him and changed his mind?

I fucking don't understand neither of you

>>18384553
I was hurt that he wants to call it off, I'd thought we were dating and it could well lead somewhere.
It wasn't really like shit, just nonchalant and not trying to seem needy or something.

a year/18 months ago:
>super depressed and anxious
>crying all the time
>skinnyfat, don't eat well or exercise
>no friends/hobbies
>no life plans, pretty much a NEET
>desperately looking for a relationship, every time it wouldn't work out bc they weren't that interested and I'd be crying and unable to eat or sleep for days, weeks to get over it

a year or so later and:
>go the gym four times a week, lost two stone then gained half a stone of muscle
>got a job, and it's kinda my dream job
>become involved in politics, through which I've made new friends
>rekindled old friendships
>seen a counsellor about my anxiety
>generally doing so much better

Here's the kicker though. I avoided dating for the last year, trying to focus on myself and not put out the desperate vibe.
Then I met this grill and I was so chill, didn't come across as desperate, had loads to talk about bc not a neet anymore etc.

Then she ends it with me after a few weeks and I feel JUST LIKE I DID A YEAR AGO. THIS ISN'T FAIR I DID ALL THIS WORK ON MYSELF I SHOULD BE ABLE TO BOUNCE BACK.

>>18384390
The more you talk about your ex the more i want to break up. Keep the past shit off record.

>>18384521
Do it frogposter!

>>18384537
Stop behaving like retarded femanon and keep dating him. He is obviously hurt from past and havent got over with it and your insecurity about him seeing other girls is not helping at all.

You want him to buy you engagement ring when he isnt even sure he will live long enough to see marriage.

Stop pressuring him to confess to you, you are obviously only girl in his life atm and that should be enough for you. You dont have to sleep with him, but certainly pressuring him wont solve anything. Be nice girl and hang out with him.

Or decide that you have no time to waste with guys who dont know what they want yet. Works both ways.

dating a girl for nearly 3 months now, have had some rough patches but going decently smooth...

weird thing is she likes to call me very late (mostly weekends but sometimes during the week when she goes out with friends/also while shes drunk), I always oblige because I usually don't go to bed until between 12-1:30 (worked nights all winter long so my sleep clock is still fucked), we usually just go get late night shitty fast food, cuddle, watch a movie/show, then fuck and go to bed, like its not the worst deal on earth at all and im not complaining about it, but she feels guilty about it the morning after, like she texted me this morning on her way to work after I spent the night and was all "im sorry again, lol". I assured her that its nothing to feel bad about.

but should I be weary of that? we've hung out and spent whole days/nights together plenty of times but as of recently late nights are about the only time we've hungout.

maybe she just wants some late night dick and she knows im always around at those hours? or is this something to keep pursuing?

>>18384559
>tells you he has problems
>doesn't want to get too close tou you
>you ignore it and force him to
>thought we were dating
what

>>18384573
>Stop behaving like retarded femanon and keep dating him
so you think it sounds like he's still a bit interested at least?

I find it so hard to understand when people say they have stuff to work on on their own or w/e, cos I'd always rather be in a relationship regardless of how much of a mess the rest of my life is lol

>>18384572
I hate to break it to you, bro, but girls are also people.
They sometimes don't want some potential partners, because of many possible reasons

>>18384583
Yeah you're probably right. At the time it felt like a pivot between putting it out there and going for it, and letting it fizzle out. But I guess if I were saying those things to a bloke I know it would be a coded message that I didn't really like him that much.

>>18384589
I didn't mean that to be a rant about the girl, sorry.
It was intended as a rant about me- how can I have put all this effort into bettering myself but still be so pathetic and desperate romantically?

>>18384579
I should also clarify that she says shes extremely appreciative of me coming over to make sure shes okay (this was also while she was drunk). im just on alert because I grew up with alcoholics and was told by my mom to never ever take a wasted persons too seriously,

just worried that she gets drunk, says/does things with me that she doesn't mean to do, regrets it, and then apologizes.

>>18384595
you still don't get it.
it has nothing to do with you being pathetic. It's just the matter of statistics - you haven't met the right girl simply because of (bad)luck. That a certain female doesn't love you, doesn't mean the next one won't as well.
It means nothing, really

>>18384586
That is the ultimate problem in
>girls vs boys
Girls are sooo complicated, scheaming, demanding, and mix it with insecurities and period and boom. Even yourselves dont know what you want.

And boys are super simple super easy. He told you
>can we please be together as people
and it means exactly what he told you. HE WANTS TO BE WITH YOU.

He probably cant put labels like girlfriend and relationship on it yet, because obviously his soul is still bleeding for some reason (i bet his ex is the cause).

It is up to you to make him trust you so he can maybe share his pain with you, cry on your shoulder a bit and you will tell him it will be ok. And in return he will trust you more than anybody else in world.

>>18384601
But wouldn't someone more well adjusted just be like 'ah well she's not the right one' instead of dissolving into a patheto-puddle?
She might mean nothing (objectively) but my response means I'm still a loser.

>>18384602
>be together as people
I think he meant like just be friends.

But how should I handle it when I see him on Friday? Should I talk more about it or just be friendly and relaxed and be with him, at the risk that I'm just having casual sex when I know I don't want that?

>>18384607
no.
it only means you're desperate, which is perfectly normal after this period of abstinence.
I've been in a similar position. Once I satisfied my desires, I calmed down and started acting/thinking more rationally.

nothing is wrong with feeling down when you are let down

>>18384613
I would ask him straightforward.
Seems like he knows pretty well, what he wants

>>18384619
Thanks anon. I feel a bit better now :)

>>18384602
Not her but I'm a guy and I disagree man. She made it clear she wants something serious and doesn't just want to have sex. This guy wants to have his cake and eat it to. THATS what he meant by lets be together as people. It's fucked, and I hate myself for being him once and having sex with girls I knew I wouldn't be with long term. I guess it's just what you do when you're really hurting.

Femanon, don't ditch him. He needs a friend right now. But don't sleep with him either. You can cuddle or something, but until he commits, don't bother giving him sex. He wants everything while giving nothing. Not fair on your end or his. He'll feel the guilt later.

>>18384613
From the mess you managed to type about what he told you, i bet you mean to him much more than some casual sex machine.

You dont cry and tell these things to strangers you sleep with. I understand your need to put label on everything you do in your life (sort of like autism :-), but you should be able to postpone that for a while.

Just chat him up and see for yourself if he will feel better. In best case scenario you want him to cry on your bed where you soothe him and use this bonding experience to forge your future husband.

>>18384634
He sounds more like broken man than dude utilizing cum and dump tactics. But maybe you are right and crying is part of his manipulation tactics.

>>18384642
>He sounds more like broken man than dude utilizing cum and dump tactics. But maybe you are right and crying is part of his manipulation tactics.

Damn you hit the nail of the problem on the head there. This is the thing I have to figure out and I guess I just don't know how to do that. Like ask him outright, or say how I feel or just be chill and see how things go?

>>18384573
>Do it frogposter!
NO I SAID TALK ME OUT OF IT GODDAMMIT
I KNOW IT'S THE WRONG THING TO DO

>>18383346

I've known people like this, I also would like to know if females could answer. To me it just means that that person isn't so interested in talking. So I just let the conversation die, if she doesn't want to talk, then there is no point in you trying to keep the conversation going.

>>18384653
You are supposted to filter cum and dump dudes by not giving them sex and seeing how they will react. The ones who wants you for more than sex will stick around longer than the others.

But since you slept already, you are sort out of luck. And admit it, you enjoyed the sex too, so what is the big deal?

And i bet my anonymous reputation that he is honest broken dude you need to repair before you marry him. If anything, he will fear YOU will use him and break his hearth again.
Whatever you decide to do femanon, good luck. And obviously you like him a lot, you wouldnt make these posts otherwise.

>>18384660
Buy condoms and DATE THE BITCH!
Or tell us why do you think it is bad idea.

>>18384653
You will know with time what his intentions are. Whatever they may be, prepare for the worst so it makes things a little bit easier. Good luck femanon and next time be sure to communicate what you want before you sleep with a man.

>>18384670
>>18384676
Thanks anons. I think I'll say this to him:
'hey, I think I got scared off by it going too slow and you by it going to fast. How about we just hang out without sex for a while and see what this develops into, friendship or otherwise, without all that emotional or sexual pressure?'

>>18384692
that's my girl.
godspeed and be more empathetic

>>18384692
That sounds like autism, but i guess we all here have it to some point.

Yes, it can work. I only wonder how will you resist your own urge to hop on his massive D.

Good luck.

>>18384718
how does it sound like autism lol i would mentally prepare too

>>18384718
Maybe I do have autism. I have heard that it's harder to recognise in women.

Guys,
>how old are you?
>how much older would you be okay with your gf/wife being?

>>18384722
Forget about it. It is probably your personality and part of who you are. I hope he is your future husbando and that it will work out well. If i am right, you will have to cut out his ex from his life and head like tumor. Good luck and try to make him trust you so his first step is to share his pain with you.

>>18384670
>Or tell us why do you think it is bad idea.
Dating a close friend is always a bad idea. One is never supposed to ask out someone you're already close with.
Also, she's my bros ex gf.

>>18384804
Nonsence. Pussy is pussy.
Dont forget to eat her out before you insert for bigger fun.

>>18384728
23

I think the biggest problem is that I'd have little to offer to somebody much older than me.Someone comparable, like, say, 5 year older should still be fine.
The body of some 30-something year old might also be good enough, but what topics would we have? She would have her work career already, I would be just beggining, providing less cash, etc.

There are plenty of issues with age differences, unless you want to have a fucktoy.

So personally I'd rather stick to someone younger

>>18384728
27
-9

Girls how much of a turn off is a guy with a high voice?

Guys,

How do I give you directions when you're eating me out or fingering me? I don't want to seem like I'm barking orders or I'm having a bad time.

>>18384728
29
4 or 5 years.

>>18384865
Instead of saying "yes, right there! Right there!", say what you want in an excited way.

I want to befriend this girl's tits. Wat do?

Do you think it's true that women regret the men they sleep with and men regret the women they don't sleep with?

Don't really wanna make my own thread for this so I'm hijacking yours

I've lost a friend to hard drugs, and I can't help them out. I think they told me about it as a cry for help, but I don't know if that's really the case, nor can I actually do anything to help them.

Unfortunately I have to just let go and accept they might end up dead and there was nothing I could do.
Its really bumming me out and I have no idea how to get it out of my head now.

>>18384857
If it's a really strikingly unpleasant voice (nasal, whiny, high) that's a serious turn off. But just on the higher end of average, sure it's not ideal but it's not like everyone doesn't have flaws.

>>18384925
Maybe by and large, but I absolutely have had guys express regret about sleeping with girls to me, and girls lack of regret about sleeping with guys (even if there was obvious reason to be wary of it in hindsight). I think it mostly depends on the person. Yes there are men who want to be selective about their partners or feel uncomfortable with fucking a random person for the sake of fucking. Yes there are women who legitimately don't see sex as a big deal. Maybe not as much as the other way around but it's always an individual case in the end.

>>18384865
Grab the guy's head and apply more or less force depending on whether he's guessing right or no.

>>18384941
Have you really tried all you can? Not so much in terms of personal effort but perhaps alerting someone close(r) to them or something? I would look up on what's typically advised to loved ones of off the deep end addicts, and see if you really exhausted your options. Just for the sake of knowing in case things do go wrong, that you did what you could.

Other than that, this is a serious and tragic matter, it is only normal that it will haunt you for a bit. Perhaps look for an online community with people in the same position.

>>18384960
I'm neglecting to tell some details about the relationship between me and this person for some reasons I have to withheld, I'm sorry.
I'm not someone significant in their life anymore, we've broken apart, and this is where they've ended up.

They won't listen to me and I'll only damage things further if I try.
I'm only close to them as a person and not those around them, I haven't a clue who to contact if I ever took that road.

I had to let go of them once, and now knowing they're being self destructive it feels like I have to let go all over again.

In a serious relationship, do you feel it's important to keep your significant other informed of the details of your day-to-day life?

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>>18384956
>If it's a really strikingly unpleasant voice (nasal, whiny, high) that's a serious turn off.

Little children legit laught at me because of my voice.
I guess it's over.

>>18384980
I think they'd appreciate it if you did

>>18384728
25. Anywhere between 25 and 40 is fine

>>18384728
18 on the dot
Ideal gf age: 19

Maximum age : 28

>>18384977
>I had to let go of them once, and now knowing they're being self destructive it feels like I have to let go all over again.

Yeah, I can imagine that very well.

If you know for a fact that nothing you can do will make anything better, your options are incredibly limited. I recommend picking a moment when you are rested and have plenty of time at hands, and wishing them well in your head. Think of the good memories, feel empathy for the choices they have not been able to avoid and all that led up to that, relish in your (past) affection, gratitude, whatever you felt and feel for this person then mentally tell them it's out of your hands, you wish them all the best, you hope they live to see a brighter day.
It might also feel good to do something in their spirit. Like pick up something in the community or donate to a cause you know they personally cared about. It doesn't have to be something big but it can feel great to have this small concrete thing you can actually DO to put your feelings into action. Best of luck.

The guy I like is 20, I'm 25... I'm not sure if the age difference isn't too big. Thoughts?

>>18384982
I'm sorry man, that fucking sucks. It's always about your package deal, though. No one is dating just your voice (or any other part of you, for that matter).

>>18384995
Ask him how he feels. Maybe he prefers older women and finds you more mature and alluring.

>>18384995
not a big deal

What's more important for a guy to be, from a girls perspective? To be funny/make her laugh or to be interesting in a more serious way?

>>18385019
Like-minded, interesting, and if you're funny and serious that is good too. Just be you because it will work out if she is similar to you.

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Where do people buy condoms?
Never seen anyone do it down in the mall, does everyone order from online?

>>18385019
It's in part personal and a matter of what they are looking for in a relationship. A girl who is young, doesn't want to date seriously and just sees a guy as a fun factor in her life will probably value humor more.

I'd wager by far most women (myself including) value being interesting more. And with interesting I don't mean having inane knowledge or having lived some wild life but just, you know, being able to express your inner monologue well, being good at having conversations about a variety of different topics. That is what keeps it interesting to talk to one another even if you know each other inside and out.

Also for what it's worth, I value humor very much in a partner but I care much much more about being able to laugh together and having (in part) a similar sense of humor, than that he needs to be able to have me rolling on the floor laughing.

>>18385022
Tesco

>>18385022
7 11

>>18385022
I buy from Amazon cause im too embarassed to fucking buy them from the self checkout. But don't be a fag like me. Just buy them anywhere

>>18384865
like most things you have to train the guy over a long period of time first before he will do it right. If you want him to do it right then you first have to let him do ti badly. Then it is all about positive reinforcement. It could start out at first as simply sharing your appreciation for him caring enough about how you feel to make the attempt at all. Then it should be stuff like "rewarding him" or letting him know when he hits a right spot or does the right move.Then he will be more inclined to keep doing that thing. Eventually it will start to become habitual. If you are too negative or too critical then he may start associating the act with these negative emotions. Keep it positive, let him know when he does something right, make sure he knows he did something right, and then reward him with positive emotions. Also when making suggestions start with the most minimal change that will require the most minimal amount of effort from him.

I got some girl's number whilst completely shittered last night.
How do i start an interesting text convo? Usually I know more about the person to go off.
Also can i wait till tomorrow or will i be forgotten?

>>18384995
depends on if you are going for a short term or long term relationship. Plus the question of whether the age difference is too big or not is up to you for the most part. Women generally tend to be attracted to men with a high status. Seeing as how he is only 20, my assumption is that he is just starting out his career. Of course it is entirely up to you if his status really matters or not. Also with that general tendency that means that as he moves up in his career and gets older he will look more and more attractive to younger women. Thus you have to wonder about the possibility of him "trading in for a younger model". Of course you very well may have a very strong relationship, where you both love and trust each other that this shouldn't be a concern. Then there is the question of having children. You may start feeling like you want to focus on a family and children at 30, which s a perfectly reasonable age. That would mean that he would have to want to have children and start a family at 25. That may be early for most men, however this guy could again not follow that tendency. This is all speculation based on general tendencies obviously so it mostly comes down to the specifics of your relationship with each other.

She said she would help me find a girlfriend. That means she's not interested in me, right?

>>18385046
>Heading out to Whole Foods, want me to grab you something?

>>18384998
Yeah, the rest of the package isn't much better. Oh well.

>>18385064
kekked. But i would probably assume wrong number and not reply so...

Women, how do I tease my sister about getting hammered last night?

She's just sleeping right now, but I wanna just rub it into her when she wakes up. I'm not that good at making jokes though.

Help! >>18384909

>>18385311
Buy them dinner.

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GUYS:

What do you mean when you tell a girl that you care about her future? He was talking about investments and I'm not as bold as he is.

>>18385346

>What do you mean when you tell a girl that you care about her future?
That they care about your future. Nothing more nothing less.

Men say what they think and think what they say.

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>>18383221
>Meet a girl through a friend
>She seems interested in my life and laughs at all my jokes
>Ask her out for a coffee 2 weeks ago, afterwards we end up walking along the beach and talking about our lives for two hours even though we hadn't planned to do so beforehand
>She seemed keen to meet again, even made some suggestions for activities
>Since then I've invited her out twice but both times she said she already had plans (seems like she's telling the truth based on facebook pictures and she told me when we met that her mum was coming to visit for a week)
>She never initiates the conversation on facebook/whatsapp but likes pretty much everything I post, and when I initiate the conversation she always responds quickly


How long do I keep trying before it gets creepy?

>>18385367
Haha, I guess so. I guess I just want to know if by saying that he sees me in his future. (We're dating)

Women, what's the appeal of effeminate men if there is one?

If there is "feminine penis", what would be a "masculine vagina"?

>>18385346
He's trying to come across as a provider/protector, some girls are into it and some aren't.

>>18385410
Ask her when she is free. Instead of dancing around.

>>18385411
If he was saying a collective "our" probably. If he just said your then that doesn't mean anything either way

>>18385445
Thank you. With talk of the investment, it's very provider-ish.

>>18385447
Doesn't that come across as pushy/desperate? Are you a girl?

>>18385464
Nope I'm a dude.
It's less pushy than frequently asking are you free today.
Just give her a window " we should X, you free this weekend?" plus then it becomes more obvious if she is judt fucking with you or not.

>>18385463
If it makes you uncomfortable just tell him and he should back off. It's hard for us to know the right balance if girls don't make it clear what they want with regards to men 'taking charge' of things.

>>18385438
Long clit. ugh

I'm a millennial (born 1999 but w/e) and I'm having a hard time connecting with girls around my age?
I have only been in love once in my life, and it was with someone in their late twenties.
Obviously she didn't love me back, but whatever.

I haven't felt that way with anyone else before.
I can't seem to get that feeling from other girls in my dating pool.

I don't know what to do. I feel pretty empty.

Suppose a close friend's partner is very attractive and thinks you're attractive, too. If you could enjoy a few hours of sex with them and your friend would never find out about it, would you do it?

>>18385527
No.

>>18385523
What made you fall in love with her?

>>18385527
No, I'm not a shitty person.

>>18385057
Probably.

>>18385532
We just talked for a long time and I just connected with her and who she presented herself to be.
It was slow at first but once I started feeling something it snowballed into something else until I went full autismo and admitted it.

>>18385523
You learned that relationships are built, not found

>>18385546
Fuck.
;_;

>>18385553
I guess so...

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I have a GF. There is one guy who was supposedly trying to be my friend, if I am moody he tells "what's wrong, I am your friend, tell me". I don't consider him a friend, and never did. As soon as he acknowledged I have a GF, he started to write her constantly, GF once said he complained to her about women.

How soon I am going to be cucked? Am I making a deal out of nothing? I must admit I am somewhat insecure piece of shit in my daily life and managing to hide it with passion.

>>18385478
Doesn't make me uncomfortable at all! I love traditional gender roles and love that we seem to so easily slip into them. I want more of this! With his text message, I was hoping it was a good sign that this is long term.

>>18385464
>>18385476
I'm a girl and it doesn't seem pushy.

>>18385523
>I can't seem to get that feeling from other girls in my dating pool.

How are the young women around your age group?

>>18385548
There is nothing wrong with telling her that you have feelings. It shows that you actually care about her. A lot of women, myself included, wish we had men like that in our lives.

>>18385559
Why does he want to be your friend?

>>18385573
Annoying. I know one girl who seems normal, never draws attention to herself, just acts like a normal person, and best of all she has athletic hobbies.
(But she's so reserved it's difficult to talk to her)

Its a rare catch in my small section of the world.

>>18385575
I'm a lot younger and it drove her away at the time. We're on good terms now, but it was really something I should have kept to myself because it ruined one of the best friendships I've ever had. Ghahh

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>>18385577
He never exactly stated that he wants to be my friend. For what I have noticed, this guy is very, very cunning, type of guy who speaks 24/7, has one fucking billion acquaintances. For once he'd tried to get into my flat politely, like, I said in the middle of conversation I usually mix alcohol with juice, he asked three times why didn't we go to my flat, I said no, and got the answer "why?". Second time, he told me to write him up to my project in credits for a bottle of beer, I haven't received anything still.
We once met each other while I've been hanging out with GF recently, and next day he asked if we already had a sleep over, he will never tell anyone. Also, she mentioned him several times, like, "this fag irritates me with his jokes". I can't avoid this guy since I have to see him every day.
What do I do?

>>18385593
add: my friend said I should have already broken his knees with truncheon

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girls: I'm a 22 latino dude who has never been in a relationship before, not a virgin but not good at sex either. I have no point of reference because all of the women I've been with were either drunken party girls or hookers (I was in the Military) so I've never once made an emotional connection with anyone. The one time a girl told me what my problem was left me fucking confused, she said I'm just "distant" even when its obvious I'm trying to be friendly or trying to flirt. What does this mean? how do I fix it?

Girls what does maybe really mean?

>>18385602
Try to be more intimate

>>18385602
You don't know how to make an emotional connection and girls need emotional connections to feel close. That's why she said you're distant. Find a good girl and vet her and start opening up to her about with your thoughts, feelings and other vulnerabilities.

>>18385610
In what context?

>>18385613
How? I give someone my complete attention, I try to connect but its like there's something in the way that never lets me connect. I have to get drunk or high to get over it hence the heavy drinking or weed smoking

>>18385563
If you want more then make sure he knows.

Cuddle him, smile and say "I like it when you take charge" or something like that.

>>18385617
Asked girl out to frat Formal month and half ago, says yes have good time, hang out with her currently, ask her to cousins wedding she says maybe.

>>18385622
I let him know for sure. This was over text and afterwards I hinted at giving him oral. He's truly amazing.

>>18385628
Not that anon, but seems like a big jump from a frat formal to a guest at a wedding.

>>18385616
Actually you may have a point, I've come to the realization recently that I'm terribly uninteresting, I can talk to dudes and make fast friends but I can't do the same with women. I have a hard time digging up fun memories that I can share with a girl because they're things only dudes could really appreciate, I'm a /k/ommando at heart and I get autistic about it. I've been forcing myself to get into pop music and movies that I never really cared for just to have something to talk about, besides that I'm just blank

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>>18385593
Bumping.

Also, this guy said to her that he has an ability to drive me mad. Several times he asked how am I doing and how my GF is doing.

So, breaking knees is the tactic?

>>18385610
"no"

>>18385640
Someday you might meet a woman who is a /k/ommando at heart and she gets autistic (passionate) about it

>>18385636
We knew each other as friends then just decided to say "fuck it" and let's try something

>>18385046
Bump?
I don't need like a one liner or anything just some tips on steering conversation. I'm bad at new people and text messages. And I've never spoken to her remotely sober so...

>>18385640
You sound like my boyfriend who has spent his entire life in the military. (He's in his 40's.) He's very difficult to talk to and sticks to very safe and utterly boring small talk topics. In the first week of meeting him, he told me the same 'funny' story twice or maybe three times. Getting him to talk about anything deeper is like pulling chicken teeth. However, he treats me like a queen, is a tiger in bed and I know that calm waters are deep waters and I look forward to slowly getting to know him (hopefully) for the rest of my life.

>>18385655
I live in California and won't be leaving for a long time, I highly doubt it. Nowadays I just go for hikes alone and take in the glorious Shasta mountains or save up what little I have to buy ammo and go shooting at the range

>>18385663
I can't imagine what it must be like to be a Senior man in the military and have to find something to say, a lot of the things I did when I were terrible, I find myself telling those same "happy" stories too but I barely have any stories from before that are interesting because I had a boring childhood too. I always tell my friends to let go and move on with their lives and leave what happened in the sandbox in the sandbox and most of them take it to heart but I'm failing to take my own advice at the same time.

>>18384865
Tell us, show us, give us feedback.
>>18385039
We boys are simple and easy, but you almost described how to train pets. You dont have to be this indirect :-D

>>18384909
Ask her on date. Become her bf and you will be allowed to cuddle her tits every day.

>>18384925
I regret the girls i havent sleep with.

>>18384941
Police, parents, slap them. Try harder.
Dont be hard on yourself if you fail to save them. And remember, even in jail they will at least stay alive.

>>18384980
Dont go full retard, but practicing communication is always good.

>>18384995
Just date him.

>>18385019
>pro tip
Girl will laught any lame joke you tell her if you are attractive enough for her. They do it subconsciently.

>>18385022
Drug store aka pharmacy. Any supermarket.

>>18385046
Introduce yourself, ask her if she remembers you and invite her to dinner.

>>18385153
Be nice to your siblings. They are your family and will help you if you will ever need it.

>>18385346
He sees you as wife material girl. Ask him, not us.

>>18385410
Keep asking her on dates dummy. Like one invite per day. Until she rejects you, keep going.

>>18385523
Dont fall for casual dating hook up system. You are still young. Try being single for a while. Take it cool.

>>18385527
If you have to ask here like this, you are just fishing for confirmation bias. Go ahead whore.
>if you really cared about your partner, you would never risk cheating them
Whore.

>>18385559
>>18385593
Sounds like psychopath or narciss. Cut him out from your life. Tell your gf to block him.
>>18385647
Cut him out from your life. Stop talking to him and instruct your gf to do the same. Dont openly call him names or do something to him. You dont want to give this type of people reason to hurt you. Be careful and firm.

>>18385602
>distant
Talk to people about your true feelings more. Dont hide facts, truth and opinion from them. Cuddle more.

>>18385628
>maybe
Indecisive bitch. Just ask her again or drop her.

>>18385690
I can't imagine either. He puts on this front of happiness and I could see right through it since day one. He's complex and interesting and I just want to sit there and soak it all in.

>because I had a boring childhood
That's in the eye of the beholder. I might see about a dozen people during my work day (and that's busy!) and I have friends that just hang on my every word about it. It's all in how you tell it. You can be terse and monotone and yeah, that's going to be dull. If you try going into extra detail, especially on something that will be important later, (let's say this customer has a toupee and go into detail about his hair at the beginning of the story and then the punch line is that a bird took off with his toupee ... like how a good stand up comic will bring the whole segment back to a joke at the beginning).

I don't find guns particularly interesting, but my guy showed me his big 4' rifle and let me hold it and told me about how it's used and how he had to lug it around for days, I found that really interesting because he found it interesting and you could hear so in the way he talked about it.

>>18385711
I grew up in the desert and we had like a mile of space between the next neighbor, I just plinked away with my .22 or played video games when I was a kid, I did some criminal stuff as a teen and nearly dropped out of high school, I only went to public High School for the last semester of my Senior year, my only friends were my cousins and a black kid who got murdered in a drive by. Its easy on 4chan to say this but I can't say it in person, its just not appropriate

>>18385731
I grew up in the sticks in mid western Canada. Town (which was a cross roads with a general store) was 15 minutes away. Closest place with a movie theatre: 2 hrs. I wandered in the woods most of the time catching frogs. I have a few frog stories that people have been really enthralled to hear... yeah, catching a frog can be interesting! It's just how you tell it.

I'm not saying you need to be the life of the party with interesting stories, but any story can be interesting depending on how you tell it, so don't sell yourself short. If you want a connection with a girl, then you're going to learn how to open up as we girls need a bit of that comfort. You don't need to be an open book, my guy certainly isn't, but you need to give us something so we feel safe and secure with you. Don't change who you are, but understand that you may have to do a bit of growing if you want to have a relationship.

>>18385749
I wish I could say I get what you're saying but I don't, there's something missing here and I can't put my finger on it

>>18385760
It'll come to you! I have to get going but if you want to shoot me an email for whatever reason, it's htk at eml.cc

>>18384980
Yes, it's how we can stay close and keep things interesting.
>>18385527
Absolutely not. You have to be a very horrible person to even consider this.
>>18385593
18+ kid
>>18385619
Sounds like you've got social anxiety and need to work on your social skills.
>>18385760
Sounds like autism. Femanon is saying that what makes a story interesting is how it's told. The more details, the more interesting it is. Women want you to share more details about yourself so they can feel more comfortable with you and you're not some mystery they cannot understand.

What are the biggest red flags?

>>18385902
China, Turkey, Morocco, and Soviet Union.