the fuck kind of person gets addicted to suffering?

>>17456794
I don't think they get addicted to suffering as much as they get addicted to the attention the receive from suffering.

However, as for people who do get stuck in periods of loneliness and feeling down. I think of it as a loop of sorts. Not necessarily an addiction.

op here, what if I don't want to experience any highs because I can't handle the lows? is that still fetishizing suffering?

>>17456805
Nah, it's just being emotionally immature. It's the equivalent of never trying new food because you might not like the taste, so you stick with the same old things that you know are never going to betray you.

It's not the worst way to live your life, but it's not good either.

"Fetishizing your own suffering" mostly just means that you believe pain and depression will help you grow as a person so you consciously or subconsciously make poor decisions and do things that you know are going to bite you in the ass. While it's true that bad experiences can teach you lessons, purposely seeking out bad experiences is just going to make you a damaged and bitter person if you do it for long enough.

>>17456861
how is it emotionally immature to want a quiet life?

People also don't like change. The unknown can be really terrifying, so they avoid change because the fear of change is worse than the fear of staying the same.

There's also some cases where reinforcement has trained somebody into continuing a bad behavior, and they're not consciously aware of it or believe that they're in the right for behaving this way because "every time I try to change the world punishes me for it, so I should just stay like this"

>>17456794

most people who suffer. everyone tends to get addicted to their lifestlye. this is equal parts being afraid of change and the need to define themselves as something important.

now you may be asking
>how does suffering make you important

but look around you. as soon as one person whines, someone else chimes in about how their life is even worse. its just as bad here as it is on tumblr. the difference is tumblr focuses on oppression and 4chan focuses on depression.

but most people here basically think that they are the most depressed person in the world. thats what makes them special, unique. no one could understand their pain, tehy'rej ust too tragic, forced to live a life they just want to escape from, but staying around for friends and family, they see themselves as too noble to commit suicide (when in fact they just dont want to).

if they made strides to be happy, they wouldnt be able to define themselves as the saddest person they know. they are no longer tragic. its no longer them vs the world, with them managing to hold strong against it.

they're just another random person. and that terrifies them more than being sad.

File: 1435005274663.jpg (14KB, 310x464px) Image search: [Google]

14KB, 310x464px

>>17456913
so they dont want to suffer but what do they want?

>>17456950

to suffer. they do want to suffer. they'd also be happy being happy but they dont know that. its like wondering if you're going to like a really gross sounding food. it may be delicious, but ur fine eating mc donalds cuz even if its bad for you, you are used to it and think its okay.

>>17456879
If you're an ascetic or something and you're truly satisfied, then it's not immature, it's a lifestyle choice that makes you content. But the context of anon's question was that he didn't want to take risks because the highs wouldn't be worth the pain of the lows. That's the immature side. And even if you adapt to it and tell yourself that the reason is contentment, if it originated from fear of pain or complications, then the root of the problem was still immaturity.

I was dumped two years ago and I'm still not even close to over it. I won't go into it but as an example at work today I saw a pair of shoes that looked like shoes my ex owned and I almost started crying because of all the memories. This thread has really caught my attention because I lost her due to my own shitty decisions and won't forgive myself for them. I wonder if I qualify for this. I listen to sad songs that remind me of her constantly, it really does almost feel like I'm addicted to the longing and unrequited love. The memories. I don't know.

>>17456794
I guess I kind of fit into this.

I'm pretty depressed and suicidal, don't really have that much to lose. So I pursue a career where I can get put into dangerous situations, as well as outside of work. After a certain point if I'm still around, I'm probably just going to travel around Asia, the Middle East, Europe etc. with the hopes of just bumping into the wrong person/people some day.

Meanwhile I could try working on my issues and fixing my life so I can live normally and be happy, but at the same time I really want to just continue down the path I'm on now since I actually enjoy the excitement and adventure - and I can't have that unless I'm miserable with nothing to lose.

But at the same time, I hate being miserable all the time and just want to live a nice normal life and settle down with someone.

It's very conflicting.

>>17456950
sympathy, validation, attention, an excuse to not have to try harder at life.

validation is one of the more important human psychological needs. attention and sympathy feel good. and having an excuse not to try harder is great if you're either lazy or have been beaten down by life and don't want to try anymore. learned helplessness is a real thing. it still needs to be fixed, but I wouldn't look down on someone too much just for having it, they just need to recognise it and try to fix it.

so as you can see, it's really easy for people to justify continuing suffering because they can usually come up with a valid-sounding surface reason and because the deeper motivations boil down to meeting unmet needs or seeking better feelings.

>>17456794
i dont know but i am
im a bitter bastard who sabotages all of his relationships and i thoroughly enjoy the ensuing misery

>>17456861

Naw bro it's buddhism. It's chill.

>>17456794
The people over at >>>/r9k/

>>17456794
its called major depression, where you stop expecting to be happy to not be let down, you have mixed feelings of saddness and happiness at the same time, or try to distract from pain.