[PAID BOTNET] http://play.esea.net
Always inspect in game, always assume the worst. Bet what you can afford to lose and most importantly always do the opposite of what /csgog/ says.
>Game Mechanic Info
Money System: http://i.imgur.com/dp4ZIQ0.jpg
Damage Chart: http://www.schuzak.jp/cs-go/dmgchart.html
Recoil Mechanics: http://twowordbird.com/articles/csgo-recoil-mechanics
>Ranks & Stats
Config Tool: http://csgohelp.com/autoexec
Livestreamer Guide: https://i.imgur.com/7u6wAGm.jpg
Open Source Twitch Chat: http://sourceforge.net/projects/getchatty
>How to git gud
Do this EVERYDAY: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SlCRfTmBSGs
Watch this EVERYDAY: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NUgKRtAJqwU
>Useful websites and maps/How to practice
Read and watch everything here:http://pastebin.com/zTwcpC1q
reminder to vote in csgogs knife skine poll
reminder to vote in csgogs knife skine poll
>cloud9 cluj stickers already quadrupled
>their 5th isn't even announced
Liquid stickers quadrupled in price when s1mple was announced bro, it's still triple the original price.
I'm waiting on c9 5th to sell then going to buy a fuckload of more stickers next major.
how do i stop completely spazzing out 1/3rd of the time
>spending this much time playing a mediocre game
>literally change your god tier name from "rape" to "t3h f4rm3r"
before you have gay anal sex you need to clean out your ass with a douche
you squirt water up your ass and shit it out until the water is clear
that's what "flushing yourself" means bro
Im sure it will work this time, r-r-right? 9 names my anime
ffs, really? this is why fags dont belong on this board
[s] Neither do I [/s}
I found this amusing. Nice shop.
Take it to /b/.
Let's not shit up a perfectly good general. Get it? Shit up?
What gun should I end my life with next?
missed the last thread
everybody already knows that our guy is back, right?
i hope you guys are buying the merch to support our guy
This helped me a ton
how do these shitters in pistol only DM's hold down the trigger and headshot me 5-6 rounds into their magazine? If I spammed left click with my crosshair at their head I would just whiff my entire clip yet they magically HS me all day
>its why posts get modded in literal seconds on weebtrash generals
That has to be bullshit. I've only been on weebshit generals a handful of times, and even I caught the blatant offtopic about tripfags and anime
in 1.6 the USP had a defined recoil pattern that you could follow every time and predict where you could get a HS. In CS:GO I spam the wall and the bullets never go in the same spot twice.
>playing against a team with guy making suspicious plays
>their 2nd from the bottom gets vacced in the middle of the match
>haven't played for a few months
>get back into cs:go with new ranking system with a friend
>me and the friend just 1 deag
>we drop 30 kills each match
>i get nova 2 because my GE elo was god awful
>play next game
>drop 30 kills deag only
>ak 1,2 top fraggin enemy team
>silver 3 and 2 at the bottom of enemies
I hate this new ranking system. It's unfair that an AK would be matched with silvers because the AK's elo before the ranking system change was that of a silver. Kind of like how i'm a nova 2 but I fucking destroy, it's unfair i'm at these ranks for the people who are legit trying to get better. But I guess thats what you get when you ask for a better ranking system from a monkey smashing his head on a keyboard.
I think i'll stay at these ranks because not trying and deaging only is fun as fuck
>playing inferno basically nuke 2.0 of the nowadays map pool
Hey guys, we are playing some games on EU MM, im on a gold nova acc but actually LEM, we need 2 more to play
LITERALLY FREE ELO, JUST ADD ME, WE NEED 2 MORE
hi guys im new to csgo, i was wondering what are your desk settings? desk height, chair height, mousepad thickness, cupholder size, Leg spread, angle of your arms, height of Monitor, angle of monitor,distance from face to monitor, brand of socks, brand of soap you use to wash your hands, Boxers or briefs, room temperature?
desk is about 4 feet, chair is as high as it will go (pretty comfy height still), qck+ not heavy, no cupholder, leg spread about 30 degrees, arm angle about 30x75, monitor height 27", angle is 100 degrees, about 1 foot distance maybe 18 inches, socks I have some vans socks that I got for christmas comfy and warm, soap i use ivory, briefs, 75 degrees with heater I like it toasty in the winter
mp9, mp7 or UMP. If the terrorists got a plant first round and you're CT side, bizon makes sense. They are most likely full saving and only have p250's or some shit, no armor.
got minimal video settings (as well as a bunch of launch options, an fps video.cfg from reddit, steam overlay disabled, and i literally go into task manager to close down like every single process except explorer.exe, my antivirus, steam.exe, etc) for everything except literally 1440x900 screen
playing 800x600 just seems horrifyingly ugly
Eagle, actual global, but on eagle acc.. Im on gold nova 1 but im LEM on main, ranks are just too wide apart to queue as 4, so we just need 1 more, it's literally a free win.. But guess people dont wanna join ;_;
Why is with CSS that attracts so many 30-40 year old men? And why do literally all of them have the most retarded rules
>playing gun game
>bhopping to the last guy
>whining when they get killed
and the worst
>girl on server
>old as fuck admin hitting on her
Is CSS where manchildren go to die?
Does reporting griefing even do anything when I have 2 derankers queing together in my team?
Why do people derank? Just as the 3 of us almost won they took turn shooting us and telling the other team our position
whats the point of spending 45mn in a game to do that
>tfw no esports going on to distract you from your life
>not literally welfare rank
i-i had been playing only dm/casual/demolition since rank changes
a-and get bad fps lags, can't keep up with peeks
and highest rank i ever MM against was MGE when playing with mg1 friend
pls no bully
Don't you feel shame for putting in such a poor performance?
This general in now under the control and support of r/GlobalOffensive.
Please visit the link below to read about this general's new rules.
no, it was on point af
altho i do feel bad that those 10 kills consisted of killing enemies that couldnt see me and were shooting someone else, duelies kills in a pistol round, and the rest pro90 rushes and sprays
so literally gn1: the rank
a pretty awkward map, the sites are like Mirage A on steriods
plays are pretty repetitive, and if you get a good tactic for rushing a particular area you've pretty much guaranteed to get a kill
outskirts of map are empty, long, boring, and not really useful
snipers are pushed right into the heart of battles, really makes everything cod-tier
it fit source's requirements of having: a bunch of long corridors for awpers, and large open empty sites for gunfights
but as a csgo map it's shitty
>lost password to steam account like a year ago
>tried to send reset password to email but never got it
>search old steam name in community
>comes up with an account that was once called my nick
>has my old group and games and achievements and "du hello" message i put ages ago
>but now name is changed and guy is from dubai apparently
what in the actual fuck happened
is this the fucker that hacked my account?
or does steam randomly give out inactivate accounts to people?
what in the actual fuck
>LE before rank adjustment
>MG1 after rank down
>win 2 games
>lose a game to a SMFC smurf
serves me right for playing right after steam sales desu
i dont understand how a paid game can have such a gigantic problem with smurfs
IS THIS REAL
AM I DREAMING
HAVE OUR SKINES FINALLY BEEN SABED
what are your favorite songs to listen to while bhopping /csgog/?
>tfw your mom hasn't gone to bed so you can't smoke weed yet
this new system man
im at least 20:10 wins:losses and i havent ranked up, and 6 or 7 out of those losses were derank duos.
casual is pretty fun lol
Alright fuck it this better not have been a meme
Why doesn't valve just shadow ban cheaters and put them in a "cheater pool" where they're only allowed to play with other cheaters or is that something that would require Valve to have some semblance of competence
it would require them to have some semblance of giving a fuck about this game
but they made like $1.7 mil within the first 24 hours of the revolver case being released so why would they?
>team is just rushing in and killing everyone so you get no kills and it looks like youre getting carried
>forced to rush too and die like an idiot all the time
who /london/ here
YOU KNOW I AM AWAKE AT THIS CURRENT HOUR
>decide to spray doors with my ak
>get a triple headshot
>get called a hacker
I know this feel and then when you're staying back to make sure the enemy team doesn't come from behind they yell at you
>do good the first 3 or 4 rounds of competitive
>after that I start sucking shit
>that feel when bad at csgo
>that feel when bad at everything
>that feel when failure
better never to have been honestly
It was a meme.
A reddit meme at that.
Prices doubled in the past 4 hours and are returning to normal. The guy who made this post had his account for 5 hours and made a fortune. At least 1k.
Which one do I use. I'm one character over the nametag limit.
>YO SKRIL AWP IT HARD
>YO SKRLL AWP IT HARD
considering valve added shit like the R8 revolver, do you think we'll see alternatives to the AWP that cost around $5000?
of course, why would valve add weapons and equipment that are used by real tactical forces when they can add in $850 pistols that one shot with 100% move accuracy?
>heavy substitute for XM
>slug ammo, tons of damage, meh armor pen
>same or slightly faster fire rate as XM
>12 rounds/mag, one spare mag
AWP already has "substitutes".
>"Thanks for coming out today anon. So, tell us about your in-game accomplishments.
I can see through smoke without external assistance
Are you implying I'm not?
lmao stay salty I got my hater blockers on
>jackass buys bomb
>hides in t-spawn
>jackass buys bomb
>team kills someone else who bought a bomb
But I was thinking about, if you could buy an extra C4 for something like $10,000 and you only need to plant one of them for the round win. Maybe let you keep it if you're carrying it and survive.
In a stupid what-if scenario.
So call a fucking strat. "alt mid to a, i'll watch flank" "rush cat, fuck it" "play for picks" "i'll fake b, you guys can go fuck yourselves". Anything.
ye shit is infuriatiing, i dont even mind running in first, but half the time theyre not even following while i scream GOGOGOOGOG CYKA
>get 2 kills on a site in peeking battles
>entire fucking team just keeps waiting and waiting and waiting
god damn you A site mirage
>People who complain about me baiting them
Like cmon a fisherman's only as good as his bait so like you should be thanking me for making you look good.
I'd like to market chips like that one day but make it smegma flavored but label it as something else
Well someone has to put you cs "pros" in their place. Maybe you could learn a thing or two kiddo.
The cs community wasn't like that until cod kiddies showed up
>tfw 3 guys on my team are playing on laptops and using their fucking trackpad instead of an actual fucking mouse
This is going to sound odd did they buff the shotguns and nerf the five seven some. Because I can't hit shit with the five seven anymore, and people are shitting on each other with the shotguns now
>get into a comp match
>team consists of a girl, one really creepy fedora beta hitting on her, and a nigger
>decide taking the cooldown for abandoning is better than dealing with these retards
>not going out with a bang and griefing as many rounds as you can before they kick you
>mfw after the rank shift i might have a chance to play with the pros
in the tier 1 pro scene, his aim is decent. he's a fucking pugstar and cloud9 are literally a boy band. They needed to not have dropped hiko, that was literally the dumbest shit ever
hiko left because he thought the team was fundamentally flawed and would never be able to win, they didnt practice enough and focused on streaming, and nothing smoked his weed
>mfw wired mouse
literally feels like i got superpowers or some shit famalam
This. Everybody knows m0E is the best player NA.
>don't want to play ranked because I feel like i'm letting people down being unable to 360 no scope collateral people at the drop of a hat
>don't want to play casual because there is no tactics and it boils down to who has the most AWPs
>deathmatch is good to learn how to shoot in but nothing more.