/HEEM/ - WITCHCRAFT EDITION

1st for mobileschaubposter

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Threadly reminder

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>>76262387

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>>76262404

This thread will be deleted after he spams

>>76262430
He already is, see >>76262426
>>76262404
>>76262387
>>76262330

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>>76262426

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>>76262449

>lol Tony would beat Conor bro
How? Striking, wrestling, submission?
>He just would bro
K.

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>>76262441
Just posting qt crowdshots lad

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>>76262470
>Mcgregor can take that leglock

KYS faggot

>>76262470
>conor would win because i like jerking off to him

k

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Why is Claudia Gadelha's voice deeper than the ocean?

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rory

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ALL THE BELTS

>>37432226
Interesting insight on Schaubsperg

Friendly reminder that if frankie wasn't injured 2 years ago and he took the fight with conor when the ufc offered it, it all would have ended there, mcgoobs would have gotten pummeled just like Yair.

>>76262538
you would think you'd come up with a new shtick in 2 years. post your "le running away man" picture again.

>>76262525
an even more interesting insight into schaubsperg:

>>>/r9k/37432226

>>76262567
Exactly what I tried linking.

>>76262553

have sex/get a dog

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>>76262494
>Tony would win because of his meme kicks and meme exercises

Is this the worst PPV card of all time?

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>get home
>see Australian is still trying to frame me as the spammer
>Australian trying to sever my friendship with Spain
>someone made an r9k thread with a Schaub image that I do not even have in my folder.

Why are people putting forth such a valiant effort to destroy me?

>>76262619
The spammer is looking for an easy scapegoat, he said this when he was talking about why he got you banned. False flagging

Who is your favorite unranked UFC fighter?

>>76262627
It's pretty annoying honestly. I know some people hate me, but I don't want everyone to hate me.

who is cyborg fighting at ufc 214?

Who is your favorite #8 ranked UFC fighter?

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>>76262629
He should be ranked already, it is only a mater of time before he's the champ

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>>76262652
Nate

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lads, i think im falling in love

aldo looks like shit for 30 years old

>>76262673
He definitely lied on his passport

>>76262673
He needs to shave for sure.

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>>76262341

>>76262711
God what an awful post. The spelling, punctuation and grammar are atrocious. That loser will never make good money.

>>76262290
This is the thread

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>>76262290

>Codyfan btfo notepad so bad he's stopped making threads and probably deleted his webms again

>>76262758
>Codyfan

literally cringed

>>76262758
Codyfan is SO based

>>76262673
He looks about 25

>>76262774
Look here
>>76262774

>>76262810
that's because you have crippling autism and need anime to tell what's going on in a face

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>>76262810
Do kids work in coal mines where you live ?
Cause that's the only explanation I'd have for a 25 year old to look like Aldo

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>>76262567
>the state of heem personalities

>>76262843
Just sit down and wipe the tears, it'll be alright

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>>76262758
just haven't felt like it
been too busy consuming media and socializing with actual irl friends to partake in heem

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Is Dana dating Miesha?

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>>76262888

>not for gay Jesus

what did Yoel mean by this?

>>76262879
The fact you instantly showed up when someone mentioned you, disproves that. This all you have

MMAFighting is such a joke anyone who unironically uses that is a piece of human shit

>>76262921

What are your go-to MMA sites besides heem.com?

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>>76262900
Seriously though that was a ridiculous situation, some faggier members of the MMA journalist population were calling for him to be suspended and everything, but he didn't even say the damn words!

>>76262942
Following a few MMA accounts on twitter is the best imo.

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>>76262902
i actually showed up because i saw the r9k thread where a schaubposter admitted to eating his own semen

>>76262963
That was you that made that wasn't it

>>76262942
bjpenn.com, themaclife, champions.co, markhunt tv, mikeswick, and mmaimports

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>>76262843
Never watched an anime in my life unless you count Arthur when I was 12-13
>>76262856
Maybe it's just how he dresses or something but I don't think he looks old

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>>76262992
for sure i would never do anything like that my man

>>76262963
>posts on R9K
Figures, no wonder you hate every decent fighter

>>76263010
>champions.co
Had to unfollow Dan Henderson, Randy Couture, and Michael Bisping because they shill this site so hard.

>loves mandrama
>spams scat
>is a paedophile
you will never get /heem/ moved. stop trying

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>>76262942
BE might be shitty but at least they've got a high ratio of real news compared to 'guy said a thing' articles. Sherdog used to be fantastic but they got new ads that make the site perform like shit on my browser, so I don't bother going there even for fighter records these days.

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>>76263065
Did you make that post on /r9k/ trying to make me look like a sicko? I bet it was you.

>>76263072
Bloody Elbow has some decent investigative articles and articles discussing the inner workings of MMA but they still have a bunch of clickbait and repost whatever Rogan said on JRE

Sperg op doesn't have irl friends

Are you knuckleheads really using a thread by the mentally ill gay spammer?

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Is there ever a moment KK isn't qt?

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>>76263133
never

>>76262946
that file name

I don't need to stoop to your level to make you look like a sicko; your collection of toddler and scat images does that for you

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>>76263133

>>76263115
Maybe it's an elaborate ruse conducted by the insane samefaggot that inhabits /heem/
I mean that Aussie that literally only posts shit about le spammer is kind of suspicious.

>>76263072
>>76263110
I honestly really like BE. What exactly is their problem?

>>76263163
What's with the toddler and pedo stuff? There's never been pedo spam?

>>76263185
I think you'd be surprised.

>>76263185
Baby Cynthia ? I dunno she seems to be triggering to spergs

>>76263174
They've got a blatant sjw culture if you ever bother to read their comments. They cover pro fucking wrestling occasionally. Clickbait-ish articles pop up a lot.
That said it's not really much in comparison to places like MMAfighting now that I think about it.
>dude look what these fighters said on twitter lmao

Last thread was really good guys, super proud of all of you

>>76262888
a better question is, is caraway getting cucked? howcome they are never seen together anymore and skanksha is always whoring it up with a bunch of other dudes.

>>76263174
Nanny state comment section, smug liberal know it alls. The latter really coming through on Twitter

Didn't Stevie Ray just fight?

>>76263225
>lol spamming is cool guys as long as it pisses off a sperg!!

-Attention whoring sperg

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>>76263133

>>76263249
>>76263271

I never bother to read comments on any news site. How do they inject SJW bullshit into MMA?

>>76263023
You should watch this
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Animatrix

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>>76263225

>>76263269
Stop projecting your cuckold fetishes onto other people's lives.

>>76263302
One example, they'll ban you for using the wrong gender pronouns for Fallon Fox.

wait so the schaubpedo scat spammer is also literally /asp/? LOL what a funny guy

>>76263269
Miesha and Caraway are both gay. They beard for each other

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>>76263321
I don't post on /asp/. I don't watch wrestling. I don't spam pornography. It's an Australian for whatever reason singling me out and trying to pit this on me.

>>76263321
Youre trying really hard to force this, aren't you?

>>76263319

Fucking hell.

>>76262888
>>76263269
seriously why is that dude all up on meesha like that tho

>>76263333
Francis Ngannou will lose to the Black Beast

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>>76263307
Cheers but I've never seen the matrix films so I wouldnt get it

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>>76263345

>>76263333
higher altitude fights in 5,000 years

>>76263319
Nate Wilcox (founder of BloodyElbow) worked for the Democratic party for 15 years.

>>76263345

I would be overjoyed to see Lewis be the one to derail the African booty scratcher's hype train.

>>76263249
The only blatent SJW writer is the chick and who cares about comments anyway

I would be overjoyed to see Lewis brutally heemed by Brendan

>>76263377
They literally all are. It shows on Twitter a lot more though.

>>76263363
Isn't that Mickey Gall's girl?

>>76263377
Nah there's also that faggola Karim Zidan who can't write an article without crying about the injustices in Chechnya.

>>76263396
it's mickey galls property yes

>>76263391
The cuck trio would become complete

Brendan < Browne < Black beast < --I
^---------------------------------------------------------I

>>76263397
At least he's doing legitimate journalism

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>>76263397
what a faggot

Since Strikeforce my guy

>>76263441
Jorge and Dustin

>>76263441
Im really sorry about your situation

>>76263377
completely untrue

connor is
zane is

maybe that guy they have on the vids sometimes who was campainging for rand paul isn't? lol

they all are!

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>>76263433
Someone fucking tell me what the story about that image is already.

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>you're in the club
>you sit down, relax and order a drink
>meanwhile this guy gets in your face and loudly and profusely starts chewing gum

What do?

>>76263478
https://twitter.com/TP_Grant

he was campaigning for him, zane made fun of him for doing it lol

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>>76263478
Theyre all nauseating lefties and/or smug pretentious know it alls

>aldo nuthuggers super confident he's going to walk through max even though betting lines are basically a pick em

gee where have i seen this before

>>76263433
Jorge Masvidal and who are the other 2?

>>76263546
Frankie vs Yair
Holloway fans are the Yair fans right?

>>76263555
please dont be serious

>>76263555
Jon Fitch + Vitor

Jose Aldo uses steroids. He was an embarrassment to the sport after the McGregor loss. I really hope he loses.

>>76263504
Circle left and bix

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nice to see Springsperg getting BTFO while I was at work, keep up the good work boys

>>76263573
Shut up

Are Brazillians the most insufferable pricks in MMA?

>be one of the best in your division
>obtain champ status
>lose
>start being a whiny bitch

This description applies to so many Brazillians

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>>76263570

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>>76263604
>i...i never lost
>it was a fluke
>i still consider myself the champ

>>76263570
That comparison really doesn't work. Holloway has been putting on amazing all-round performances against top fighters, Yair had been knocking out mid-level guys and a decrepit BJ Penn.

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Still my boy.

>>76263570
Andre Fili is like Holloways 6/7th biggest win as opposed to biggest

>>76263555
Buddy valastro and war machine

>>76263604
YES brazil is the worst just not maia

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thoughts on this """man""" /heem/?

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>>76259912

>>76263698
not tall enough to ride most amusement park rides

>>76263604
Name 4

>>76263607
You think Max hits as hard as Conor? His only way of victory is points

>>76263735
Max is weak verbally and physically to Conor

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>>76263702
all places should have height charts like hershey park

>>76263668
Maia is ethnically half Russian on his mother side. His dad is Brazilian and he grew up in Brazil but his mom is straight babushka

>>76263718
Aldo
Werdum
Silva
Nunes (soon)

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>>76263752
>You must be this tall to ride the Hershey Highway

Aldo is one of the nicest guys alive, people hating on him and celebrating is defeat is sad to see.

>>76263799
How is he nice? He had no personality until he got ktfo and then we learned he's an insecure sore loser and a crybaby.

>>76263799
Casuals have extremely short term memory

>>76263836
This. He's fucking awful. I've been watching MMA since the 1990s.

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eyo wassup heemlords

im listening to danny elfman on this comfy thursday night pre champions league's final + waldolloway

life is beautiful because im surrounded by hot chicks at my job

and i love you, guys

always did, always will

:*

>>76262619
Why is Conor's head so much bigger than Schaub's?

>>76263836
>He had no personality
I don't want loud exaggerated personalities. Jose is a very respectful guy and a great fighter.
>>76263861
Even if you don't like him you have to understand how devastating it would have been to get bullied like that and then knocked out in 13 seconds. It would have been easy to leave the sport and retire like people telling him to. Instead he let it fuel his fire.

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reminder that Ricardo Lamas almost beat Josay aldo

>>76263836
>sore loser and a crybaby.
He knows it was a fluke, he has to talk his way into a rematch or he will never get it
He has every right to be upset.

>>76263898
Aldo has hardly ever been respectful youre just comparing him to conor

>>76263967
When has he been disrespectful? Only when other fighters started it. Aldo would happily do no trash talk

MAX DROPPIN AS IT IS

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I3XAxlZsxLo
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I3XAxlZsxLo
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I3XAxlZsxLo

>>76263907
No he didn't, at all.

>>76263357

wtf is this image

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>>76262616
211ers are real

>>76264139
Alan Joubon is so badass he doesn't care about doxxing himself

>>76264001
He talks down on everyone all the time. He's a whiner too stop acting like he's an angel saint youre just anti conor

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>>76264139
>wtf is this image
alan jouban's address

Watching tuf

Joe Stevenson story is sad af

Also Cody finally won a fight that they shouldn't have

>>76264140
>tfw making fun of 196ers was 10 years ago

>>76263357
>>76264156

Thought Jouban would have a nicer house desu

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>>76264170
>youre just anti conor
I'm really not. Are you just a Mcgregor fan boy?

>>76263907
>reminder that Ricardo Lamas almost beat Josay aldo
(You)

LADS

ALDO IS BROKEN IN THE INSIDE

WHAT IF HE LOSES?

WILL HE AN HERO?

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>>76263546

I'm not confident at all, I'm actually very nervous

>>76264211
It's in a real nice area, probably smart to only have a small house when you're a 35 year old fighter

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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=15KyTUId0go
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=15KyTUId0go
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=15KyTUId0go
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=15KyTUId0go


MR COKER COMIN WITH THAT FINE ASS STRIKEFORCE 2.0

>>76264245
No. Youre clearly just a contrarian aldo fanboy

>>76264299
Shut the hell up

>>76263546
>looking at betting lines to for an opinion

lmao

blowgay asshole fucking sucks i hate him so much

>>76264391

Bellator unironically has better videographers than the UFC

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>>76263623

>I swept and controlled him yeh
>that boy got lucky
>I ate a few too many breakfasts, I wasn't actually hurt at all
>in my mind, and technically, I am still champion, because I never put my belt on the line and will bring the belt with me to the press conference of the fight in which I got finished

Much better, you're right

Holloway will get embarassed, Aldo is way out of his league, it will be the same as UFC 200

Aldo needs to move up, its not fun watching him beating these scrubs no more, he needs to hang with the big boys, there is so much more fun matches for him at 155

Aldo x Kebab
Aldo x Ferg
Aldo x Nate(kek)
Aldo x Barboza

>>76264593

If he beats Holloway it makes sense for him to move up. I don't think he'll "embarrass" Holloway though; even if Aldo wins the reason he did so well against Frankie was partially because of the size difference and he won't have that advantage in this fight.

>>76262457
hnnnngh

>>76264593
Holloway isnt generic wrestleboxer #4563. Holloway knows how to actually feint and cut angles, maneuver the pocket. He also can mix it up with kicks

>>76264608
>not "wassup vitor how are you lmao ees normal" filename

disappointed desu

>>76264593
>>76264633
He'll be ridiculously undersized at 155. He's not even a big 155er anymore.

>>76264551
And Conor's opponent grew three sizes that day

>>76264633
Size means nothing when Aldo has more reach
Aldo is just too technical for that division, even at 155 probably only Conor and one or two guys can trade shots with him
>>76264649
Frankie Edgar is a better striker than Holloway, also Holloway is pillow fisted and has ZERO head movement

>>76264670
*big 145er fuck

>>76264456
I'm a huge Aldo fan, but I in no way hate Conor or any fighter. The truthis you've spoke shit about Aldo but haven't used any evidence to back up your claims and you're now getting upset.

>>76262460
1st for passable trap

>>76264702
>Frankie Edgar is a better striker than Holloway

Lmao @ u rn bud

>>76264670
Aldo body changes a lot depending on who he is fighting, I could see him bulking if he were to fight Khabib, for example, he would be almost as big as Tibau and ten times better

>>76264716
>I'm a huge Aldo fan

All that needed to be said

>>76264670
He would be undersized but not ridiculously so, a bulkier aldo would be about eddie's size.

>>76264745
Holloway was having trouble with Pettis jab, and Pettis was never known for his great jab
Aldo will outpoint him easily while he punches air all night

>>76264245
that's exactly what he is

Who is left hook Larry and why should I worry about him?

>>76264456
>Picking the best FW ever is contrarian
wew lad

>>76264819
Thought so

I miss Marcus Brimage

>>76264796
>>76264747
He would be alot smaller than any ranked fighter, and putting on a shit load of muscle is the last thing he needs considering the way he fights and his previous endurance problems.

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Somebody needs to update this with his Bellator misadventures

>>76264804
>Holloway was having trouble with Pettis jab
Actually fake news. That jab was non-existent for 95% of the fight. Pettis also has a significant reach advantage.

>>76264851
You literally cant read for shit. You must have autism

>>76264911
He would be of comparable size to eddie, al, and dustin.

Anyone have webm of Ariel dancing backstage without knowing he was being recorded?

>>76264991
I know what the word literally means.

i will be laughing so hard when Aldo 49 - 46 Holloway

sometimes people forget how good Aldo is, so let me remind you

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_JYqt5Lepws

and this was aggainst a Frankie Edgar who was on a streak and looking great

>>76265155
lol no one cares about your roiding excuse making crybaby

>>76265150
Cool. Youre as smart as a 1st grader

>>76265022
You'd be surprised as fuck lad

>>76265155
>frankie edgar is a better striker than max holloway

>>76265249
I dont get why people think Max is that great of a striker
He leaves himself open to counters, gets hit a lot, got no knockout power and throws wildly
Frankie got none of these traits and skill got BTFO, what makes you think Holloway wont?

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>>76264738
i think you'd be surprised

>>76265337

fuck thats hot

>>76265155
Max took Conor to a decision. Aldo got slept by him in 13 seconds.

>>76265371
>MMA math

>>76262457
Would colonize.

>>76265425
no woman would ever have sex with you

literally how would Aldo vs McGregor 2 go?

>>76265312
>frankie has none of those traits

HOWLING. He's a target that bobbles in a straight line

Max also moves around infinitely better than Frankie and most certainly has power. He wears down his opponents more than anything though and can actually mix it up with kicks. He also isn't nearly as hittable and wild as you think. Him getting engaged in flurries doesn't mean he's wild. If anything he leaves himself more open while he's on the outside waitin to strike

>>76265451
McGregor by KO, just wouldnt be so fast
As much as it hurts to admit it since Aldo is my boy, but Conor is a nightmare matchup for him
Styles make fights

>>76265361
gay

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are these tits natty?

>>76265500
when was the last time you saw Max Holloway dodging a punch

>>76265451
Aldo would outclass Conor and embarrass him for a few minutes then Conor would land one punch and put him to sleep. Aldo is the more skilled fighter but Conor hits harder

Genetics>Skill

>>76264702
>Size means nothing when Aldo has more reach
You're retarded. Aldo will be punching up, there will be a distance where Max can punch Aldo in the face but Aldo can't punch him in the face.

>>76265022
Definitely not, Poirier walks around at 180 in decent shape.

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can she beat jessica eye?

>>76265709
Last fight. You clearly don't actually watch a lot of his fights

Aldo punch still hit McGregor even when Aldo was unconscious
I believe McGregor isnt fast enough to dodge Aldo punches, he just punched faster but also got hit
A rematch would be pretty interesting

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>>76264284
He still has his burgers

>>76265831
It's the reach

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>arguing about aldo and holloway for 10 hours straight

>>76265720

First off, Aldo won't need to punch up because Max will widen his base, because he won't want to have to punch down. Second, if Aldo punches up, his shoulder and arm will raise above his ear and create an obstacle to block max's punches

>>76265909
Isn't it only 2 inches more? Thats not much desu when you realise reach is wingspan. At most he has 1 more inch one each arm. More likely he's slightly broader or has longer fingers.

It's his power and huge hands that matter

>>76265952
well, it will probably be the fight of the year so yeah

>>76265952
Better spam more heads and friend simulate i guess

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>>76266028
its going to be a war heh?

>>76265996
>because he won't want to have to punch down
He won't be you mong, a few inches is the perfect height advantage to have because your shoulder is level with their face.
>Second, if Aldo punches up, his shoulder and arm will raise above his ear and create an obstacle to block max's punches
Irrelevant. The statement "size means nothing if Aldo has more reach" is fucking retarded.

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>>76265779
maybe

>>76266099
it is what it is

>>76266026
Its 4 inches. That's a lot.

>>76265779
in an ugly contest

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>>76266169

>>76266028
If Max wins its gonna be sad because Aldo will look old, if Aldo wins its gonna be a war.

I hope Aldo wins, all these vets usually get upset by the young guy im hoping for once the old guy wins, also Yair vs Frankie doesnt count Yair barely got past that afro nigger, Max is totally legit.

if we never get Aldo x Conor 2 its a fucking loss, i still got blue balls from that fight

>>76266238
I posted it again xD

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>>76266278

>>76266267
Aldo style doesnt rely on his athleticism so much as flashy fighters like Silva and Conor
I can see him fightint at GOAT level until he is 35 or something

>>76266306
hahaha le homeboy

I'll level with you guys, I would fucking destroy Conor but would get destroyed by Tony

>>76262538
Frankie wasn't injured, he ducked.

All the "chad lost because of short camp" stuff spooked him out over taking a short notice fight.

are you guys getting the most out of your free month on fightpass? i dont really know what to watch. i've been catching up on welterweight title fights from before i started watching

>>76266357
lol you're an idiot he's a weathered roider

>>76266491
Frankie shitcans Conor blindfolded

>>76266564
Maybe, but Conor without a blindfold would win inside a round.

>>76263357
>jouban lives in reseda

what the fuck

>>76264156
That's fucking retarded.

>>76266555
Do you have to punch in your credit card number? Because fuck that

>>76266797
Ah, there seems to be a misunderstanding from a grammatical error. Frankie while blindfolded, shitcans Conor

>>76267010
nah, you just needed to put in a code and an email but the code was only for last sunday

>>76267010
>mommy won't let me use her credit card
Don't worry bro, you don't need one.

>>76267090
Yes you do

>>76267090
lmao

Claudia is the only one Joanna has struggled with so far.
And a third time would be hard for Joanna too.
I don't see any other women to be hard fight for the champ.
There is a big gap between Joanna and Claudia and the rest of the division.
Unless Karolina bring something good for her next fight.

>>76267398
i guess you didnt see that sheematoma jessica gave her huh?

>Anderson Silva x Cormier actually happened

heh, I remember how crazy /heem/ went when the rumors were spreading

>>76267450
Andrade lost all 5 rounds, JJ didn't struggle at all.

>>76267543
that fight sucked

>>76266267
Akdo isnt old ya facking jabroni

Rashad vs Sam Alvey in Mexico lads

>>76267543
i forgot that fight even happened. UFC 200 was a joke

>>76267708
Alvey by KO

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can someone shop semi-transparent laughing joanna faces over this like those conor memes?

Aldo is missing weight by a pound and a half, you heard it here first

>>76267900
The fight is in brazil, the commission will find a way to allow it

>>76267886
no because
WMMA = WGAF

>>76268003
t.someone who picked andrade

Lol gonna be so awkward when Rogan interviews Cyborg in the Octagon

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>>76267886

>>76268056
No I had Eddie, Frankie, Joanna and Stipe accumulator

I was just watching that fight and even though Joanna did good all I could realise was how sloppy both were

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>>76268189
u da real MVP

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I have 13 pounds left in my account

Should I just do these?

I can't support any fighters who don't support the Reebok deal.

>>76268398
what fight?

>>76268398
Put it all on Vitor by ko

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>>76268189
ok now do it with this pic instead

>>76268427
Vitor vs Nate sorry
>>76268443
I think its a good bet, I think normally Nate wins but with it being Vitors last fight he'll probably be juiced to the gills

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Lads i'm going to be on a plane all day Saturday and I might miss the fight.

Post
>aldo won the decision, holloway won the fight
for me

>>76268619
What budget airline are you flying that doesnt have internet?

>>76268674
I ain't paying $20 dollars
>Look, I never payed for UFC in my life
>On June third, I ain't doing it

>>76268852
Get internet on your flight you cheap zilch.

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>>76268619

Save this version

Someone liven this thread up and post some scat.

>13 seconds

>>76269263
everybody is watching basketball. its pretty bad but im watching it too

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any body else got /yaya/ fever?

>>76263604
sounds like Luca Rockhoza

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>>76269606

Holly Holm and Betch would make the greatest ultimate surrender match ever.

The high test females finger banging against the cage.

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>>76269673

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This is what Hunto-Lewis will look like

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dont let heem get heemed like we did during the superbowl

>>76269606
That tennis ball shit is impressive

>>76270330
nigga he gets hit with half of them and the one's he doesn't were going wide anyway watch it again

>>76270654
EDIT: the ones he doesn't

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>>76270092
Hunt is deleted desu. He landed clean elbows on Overeem and barely wobbled him. Prime Hunt would have deleted Overeem with a jab. Lewis hits hard and he is durable enough to survive weak Hunt.

>>76270654
>nigga
Literally cringed