New Zealand 182/4 (20 ov)
vs Sri Lanka
West Indies 330
BBL: Thunder vs Scorchers tonight
Lads I unironically think we should have an Auckland meetup at the T20 this weekend.
There are at least three of us right? Me, that one guy who said he was going and Daniel. Statscunt apparently is too but fuck him.
>your sitting at home
>your neighbour Holly sees you over the fence
>she yells out
>"hey anon, want to have a bat with me"
>"come on, anon. I'll be right over"
>get your dick out
>start start having a bat
>Holly walks in the door
>she's carrying her cricket gear
>there has been a misunderstanding
hello lads. i once spent two weeks in new zealand once does that qualify me to post itt
>Is the ONLY Kiwi who doesn't care about his "e-persona" and doesn't actively try and seek attention
>Is the ONLY Kiwi who doesn't have an inferiority complex
>Is the ONLY Kiwi who isn't a mental manlet
>Is the ONLY Kiwi who isn't a memespouter
Stop giving him compliments and confidence like this.
Posts like this are EXACTLY what turned AMS and Statscunt into the insufferable faggots they are. You are just fueling his ego and eventually he'll start feeling the need to keep up his e-"""persona""".
This site has nothing to offer anybody. There is no quality content you cannot get more quickly and efficiently elsewhere. This is an addiction which reduces your productivity, attention span, and free-time. You are becoming more bitter, narrow-minded, haughty, and old. Leave now and block this site. There is nothing here but slow, lonely suicide.
People do not have arguments here. Posters do not engage one another on key points, they nitpick with greentext and mock each other. Nobody is interested in the truth; people are battling for fleeting moments of superiority. Active commenters are loud jackasses who tumble into one internet fight after another, anxiously keeping ten tabs open to ensure they keep the last word in all of them. An insightful post is one in ten thousand, and no matter how hard you filter this place you are still searching for diamonds in a garbage dump.
This place is not making you happy. You are not having fun. You are not gathering stories to tell, learning, or growing as a person. Instead you chuckle every thirty minutes and are occasionally spurred to masturbation by libidinal posts or pictures. You are addicted to readily available information and pressure free social interaction. This place is slowly poisoning you with misogyny, narcissism, a false dichotomy surrounding normalfags, and insecurity.
I'm not telling you to be yourself. I'm not telling you to go outside. I'm not even telling you to make friends. Just leave 4chan. Do anything else.
the old order change up meme
dont you wish australia had maxwell right now
>Mitchel Johnson in a Powerade ad
I wonder how the contract for that works with him quitting test match cricket.
>sign endorsement deal with a cricketer
>cricketer quits the most widely covered version of cricket
>return on investment btfo
"You're here forever." 4chan is addictive, and many, if not the majority, of people who post here are deeply addicted. People can come up with justifications as to why 4chan is better than other internet communities, but no matter where you go you're basically reducing human interaction to internet comments.
It's like if I'm smoking ounces of weed a week and saying "at least I'm not a drunk." Don't try to justify what 4chan is, you're getting even less out of it if you do.
I'm a drunk. Does alcohol help me in some ways? Absolutely. Is it also a deleterious way of coping with life? Absolutely. Don't go out of your way to defend 4chan, it doesn't care about you.
The Australian media is purely white, and australia is historically racist.
I'm not trying to take the piss, but I honestly think they want the big black guy to fuck off because he doesn't fit the nice white guy image the BBL is trying to sell.
There isn't a single brown person in the australian cricket media
I didn't used to lump you in with him, but he's right, you've become a massive faggot recently. It's basically ever since Daniel took off as a meme and you got bitterly jealous, your posts have been less and less interesting and more and more fucking memespouting angry seething garbage. That, combined with the fact that you are 28 and unironically talk about racial purity, just makes you sound like a complete knob. There was a time when I was unironically interested in meeting you irl but that time has long passed.
>There was a time when I was unironically interested in meeting you irl but that time has long passed.
I have way too much at stake to ever reveal my true self to anyone on here. I only shitpost when I'm bored - wagecucking takes away too much of my energy to do it consistently.
Ok, but he's looking in the wrong place.
I don't really care, but I'm just letting you know that your e-celebs are somewhat confused.
I'm not sure what happened to the poster formerly known as AMS. I think he's gone into hiding because he regrets doxxing daniel.
>I'd rather watch a guaranteed rained out draw then an exciting Wallop20 match
>I think he's gone into hiding because he regrets doxxing daniel.
Yeah now that you mention it, he was a lot more coherent in his posting and had some semblance of a soul.
The one we call AMS now is just the same loser from /nrl/ who walkcunts with zero replies about 50 times a thread.
I am LITERALLY the only New Zealand poster.
Daniel, Statsgook and AMS are products of my imagination, and you are all pawns, falling for my elaborate ruse. You are nothing but cockroaches to me.
stove better send out GOATges next for some more padding
we can get him to a 90 career average surely
No daniel, my posting style is incoherent to newcunts like you.
Most of the kiwis here are furious because they only started coming here since the CWC and don't understand the subtleties of classic 4chan posting. Quite a few of the aussies do though.
The fact that you are furious about a post not being a reddit-esque essay speaks volumes about your autism.
No Australian. U srs cunt?
I'm unironically a /pol/ tier coloureds hater, and even I'm put off by the covert racist treatment of Gayle. Also, that cunt would've laughed it off if a blonde blue eyed white boy like Beaton or White said that
Couldn't find your shovel to get it out of the Hangi in time?
>haven't spoken for four months
She's literally more autistic than me, I'm telling you lads
Why is /cric/ so much uglier and more beta than /afl/ and /nrl/?
>get in /poo/ for being killing african wildlife
>"b-but my wife had just died, that makes it ok"
I only date white women, I just have to pretend I don't have that preference.
So fucking stupid when you think leftists say its your choice with who you love provided you don't have racial preferences
Sodhi actually could be good as a meme cricket spinner. He has a googly and that's literally all you need to be good at T20 spinning
Need it for certain reasons, and I made all my posts pre-last year private.
>/holly/ will never fuck you with her strap on, while calling you her little bitch
Why even live?
>"so you want to hear Bulls on Parade anon? I'm not sure if I can play that"
This, I'm not a faggot that takes pictures on a tramp
(well except for this one, but that bridge was dank)
Yep. That pic is from "the windows" in a tunnel.
Am still trembling
Anyone want to support my /kickstarter/ for the surgery?
>I'll take nude selfies for you when it's all finished
When /cric/ goes to the beach do you stare at topless qt's like a creep or is that just part of your culture that you don't care about.
>tfw I was 14 me and my cousin were at Manly beach taking pictures of all the topless women
Good day to play some cricket lads
i dont doubt he'll try it, he's literally talked about doing exactly that
The other day he was posting webms of men sexually assaulting women in public and masturbating in public. He is literally perverted.
He's probably actually dangerous enough that someone should probably report him to the police. I just cant be arsed doing it.
I don't think he is. I think he just plays it up to 1) justify in his mind his own pathetic existence and 2) play up his "gimmick". he is a huge attention seeker. His "fame" on here is literally the highlight of his ""life"".
/cric/ we're mainly Aus and NZ at the moment. Thoughts on this fucker?
>His "fame" on here is literally the highlight of his ""life"".
This. How many times does he bring up his schizophrenia just so he can talk about it?
Can't be arsed reporting him - it's not like it affects me anyways :^)
I just bought 2 bottles of red wine - 16 standard drinks - for $10 total. Now That's What I Call Value!
>not being able fall asleep after fapping in the living room
>not being able to turn up the TV and shit with the door open so you don't miss the cricket
>not being able to do everything in the nude
Impressive. how did you manage that one?
Lads, I'm a fucking idiot.
Kane is bowling all the wildcards at the death because he wants them to get as much prep before the WC. He knows Boult and Southee will do it at the cup, but in case they get wallopped he needs his other players to step up.
Kane on GOAT captain watch.
This has been the worst period of cricket I can remember.
Seriously every fucking match is either a domestic T20 or an international T20. The tests haven't really been interesting either. The most interesting games to watch have "literally" been the Afghanistan vs Zimbabwe ODIs.
GODt ElliGOAT on Nobel Prize watch.
>Holly will never lock you in a chastity cage, tease you with a body on body nude oil massage every night, and tell you she will only let you out when the West Indies wins
Why even live?
Both of these teams will get pounded in the Wt20 if they play like this
IMO the best t20 teams are >us, India and Englel (unironically). >We would be clear favourites but without Starc it's alot more even and >we have no spinners. India have no death bowling but their batsman are good enough to win it for them. England's problem is they have no good t20 seamers, Ratshit will be really good in Indian conditions tho.
fuck me lads
I was sitting behind this curry chick at a lecture today and she looked like a major fucking qt. But get this lads, when I looked closer her whole back was LITERALLY covered in hair.
what the fuck, how do curry men handle that shit?
I had a qt curry ex gf. her back was covered in hair but it was very thin hair, barely visible. didnt really care. it sounds a lot worse than it was. i'm sure the thickness of back hair varies between curries though
the popular and respected third kiwi has ONLY been revealed after a particularly muscular cricket opinion was posted under a NZ flag (normally an oxymoron) and is NOTHING like statsgook, Daniel or A. M. Spouter
Don the trip, earn my respect and you might end up with a marine tank of your own mate.
>LE FUG LE HAIRY WOMEN xD xD
I'm sure her hair wasn't that atrocious. Besides if you dated her you could always convince her to wax if it puts you off so much taking her from behind.
>Holly will never spend the entire day punching you in the balls while you watch the cricket, because you told her there aren't going to be any pink balls in the test today.
Fuck off Daniel, she's clearly trying to rekindle your friendship after you ignored her messages like a complete fucking cunt.
Seriously, you always post about how depressed you are and how no one invites you to shit, well it's pretty fucking obvious why that happens.
Fuck me, you are an irredeemable autist Whois ENTIRELY responsible for EVERY situation you find yourself in
That's "literally" not what I said at all. The fact is that beta as fuck faggot has probably never got laid in his life, so fucking a cute girl that has a bit of hair shouldn't be so much of an issue for him.
le "search the picture for things you can point out and speak negatively of in an attempt to undermine the person's post" well memed friend
Not sure if I ever told you this but she "literally" friendzoned Hugh two years ago. As in, he was all "I think we would be good in a relationship" and she was like "lol go away". She's currently going for some guy way out of her league
some of them, yes, some of them no. this one? not really. was a bit flat desu
She was wearing that overall denim meme outfit girls buy these days >>64732383
Lad I'm telling you this girl could choose ANY handsome intelligent white man, chink or BBC if it weren't for the back hair
Nah another guy who she's had a crush on for a while. He evidently must have broken up with his girlfriend but I don't really know, I'm just kinda piecing together from the few bits of group chat I read.
I don't actually know if she ever met Ajay in person, she just posts his status updates in group chat
Can we get our facts straight? The girl who I was somewhat interested in was not Chloe, although I did kinda fuck it up (especially given she actually made the first move), but I could potentially revive it, it wasn't a major fuck up.
Chloe's been in Australia for a month and I'm still not really sure if I want to pursue her. She's evidently into me.
>Holly will never make you wear her panties because she thinks your tiny dick is more like a clit
why, is your last name Marsh? Welcome to the team m8, here's you're baggie green
Get her to send you her tits on facebook. don't just rush into it like a freak; start up a chat, talk about normie shit, if she's actually responding start asking shit like her outfit for the day (chicks actually like getting asked that shit), but not "what are you wearing?", and there progress from there
>Chloe's been in Australia for a month and I'm still not really sure if I want to pursue her.
>cuckiel sperged out so she come to GOATstralia to get drilled by BIG STRONG AusGODS
answer the question you faggot >>64732640
Daniel, have you seen Back to the Future? I'm willing to help you laid:
>I get Ivana out on a date
>easily done, I'm pretty good-looking and charming
>I'll park up with her
>sexually force myself on her
>maybe rip her panties if she's wearing any
>you jump out of the bushes
>KTFO the bad guy
>get the girl
Nah not spoiling too much. Besides, this is total conjecture, I don't actually know if there's a thing between them but there are hints that there is.
I still have to go back to uni, I'll see her then.
>Get her to send you her tits on facebook.
Brilliant advice, thanks.
>So you're the one who had a girl ask you to get coffee with her and then ran off to /cric/ for advice
No, at least not that I can remember
>it's a latest developments in Daniel's love life thread
How's your love life, pajeet?
I think it's fairly obvious that me wanting Ivana was a short-lived one-month long meme that grew out of isolation. As much as saying it is a meme, she would be far better as a friend than as anything more.
>real cricket is bigger news than fake cricket
>I don't care about her but I'll go running back to her the moment uni goes back and I realise I have no friends
Fucking neck yourself Daniel, I mean it.
You are LITERALLY a sociopathic cunt. I'm going to unironically beat you up the moment you step out onto the tarmac in Australia
it was pretty smart tbqh
>cant end game until 5pm
>declare @ 4:50pm so the game ends for the "changeover"
>guarantee Warner doesn't sperg out and ruin his average
Stove is a fucking elite captain
>Holly will never feed you a bottle of viagra, tie you up and lay you on your back, then use your "stump" to practice run outs
What the hell is your problem? Are you "literally" 13 years old? Because that's how your post comes across.
Pretty sure it sounds like you still want to fuck her brains out.
This, while his technique is solid, his hand eye coordination doesn't seem too great. He's not the most creative batsman I've seen either, so he will get figured out soon enough.
>How's your love life, pajeet?
Literally nothing to show for. Went to a boy's school, ended up studying Mechanical engg which has exactly 2 girls in the class of 60. It's difficult to meet girls outside of school or work.
Thank Ganesha for arranged marriages though.
>Pretty sure it sounds like you still want to fuck her brains out.
How? Have you seen her? Her best feature is unironically her personality.
Mecheng here too in case you didn't know. We've got about 25% girls which is pretty impressive. There are about 4 (four) that are attractive. Five at a push.
Yeah I had that for a while when I was applying to go to med school. I was going to be a doctor just like my parents, but I got a promoted to an executive level. Who knows, maybe my life would have turned out for the better had I chosen a more noble pursuit.
I have fond memories of that time, mostly because I was with my gf then. So I'm going to bring it back now you brought it up. Might even help you guys out and start up a medical advice thread like I used to do.
I hope Gayle bankrupts the shit out Fairfax
he was dropped like just 10 minutes before, he was giving less of a fuck once he got to 100
>LE YOU ARE PROJECTING
Fuck off Daniel. Yes, I did use to be a pathetic little beta like you who cried about my sad and depressing life on 4chan, but I worked my way out of that and now enjoy a healthy and active social life with a diverse group of friends. I've LITERALLY tried to help you soany times over this last year and you just ignore EVERYTHING myself and others say and keep on making the same mistakes.
You ARE a pathetic shit and you WILL continue to be one unless you take some positive action, serving you seem to want to avoid at any cost
Everyone here is a mess to at least a certain level. My mess got exposed, and therefore everyone rampantly shits on my behind the wall of anonymity to make themselves feel better. They can see that I'm a mess (true), and while they probably concede that they themselves are a mess too, I can't see that, and therefore they use this as an opportunity to put themselves on a fake higher ground.
I do come off as a cunt sometimes though, but the guys I've met from here know otherwise.
Case in point >>64732949
Don't be coy mate, the fact that she is a plain jane and rejecting you is only making your penis harder. You would give anything to hate fuck her after all she put you through.
>Chris Gayle's management have retained the services of a "leading Australian media lawyer"
>You ARE a pathetic shit and you WILL continue to be one unless you take some positive action, serving you seem to want to avoid at any cost
Oh fuck off mate have you not been paying attention in the last month
>I have a job at a large firm
>I'm putting more effort into meeting girls, and have met girls
>I'm cutting off toxic relationships
>I'm spending more time with people who I consider friends and care about me (my band)
>I'm literally and unironically playing cricket again
>I'm literally and unironically doing exercise again
If that isn't positive change then what is mate
>you will never get life advice from krazykrezja because you always blow him the fuck out with your muscular cricketing knowledge and he's still seething you found out his reddit account while he still hasn't found yours
feels bad man
Never said that, I said not sure. I'm no doubt gonna take her out a couple of times to see whether or not she fits but right now I'm not certain. No way I'm not giving it a shot, for the exact reasons you said.
KEK, to think you spent THAT much time typing up those lies to feed your massive ego and seek attention on 4chan.
You really are a loser, and you have been EXPOSED as a liar.
You were NOT diagnosed with depression by anyone but yourself.
You are NOT clinically depressed.
You are NOT going through a hard time in your life.
You have NEVER experienced any hardship.
You ARE a young cunt idiot with a massive ego, who pretends to be depressed on 4chan for attention because you have no one in real life to attention seek to because you have alienated yourself by being a delusional vain cunt who thinks he's smart, when you are in fact a retarded idiot who has achieved NOTHING in your life, and you NEVER will.
Stop posting here
Stop coming here.
You are absolute human garbage, and a fucking leech on those who are actually worthwhile.
You are nothing and should seriously